Something wasn't adding up.
That was all Bella knew for certain.
What she wasn't so sure about was what exactly was wrong. As she sat in her empty apartment, she tried to come up with a reasonable conclusion from the facts she had hastily written on her notepad.
#1. Jasper Whitlock brings back so many memories of Edward. I find myself thinking about him more than usual since Jasper started working at Heaven.
#2. I found the coat I gifted Edward years ago in Jasper's closet.
#3. Jasper's personality is so much like Edward's –same charming smile, charisma, and appeal. To me, at least.
#4. Jasper and Edward seem to have the same effect on me. They can calm me, comfort me…make me feel loved.
So what did all of that mean?
She had no flipping idea.
Bella rubbed her face and slumped further on her couch. It was already one in the morning and she was tired as hell, but she knew she wouldn't be able to sleep. Not with the whole Jasper situation eating away at her.
She guessed she had no choice but to figure everything out, then.
Staring at her notepad for the nth time that night, Bella tried her best to think rationally. The common denominator for everything she'd written was Jasper having a lot of things common with Edward, so that meant that the two were just simply alike – probably a little too much, but there was nothing peculiar about that. People had similar personalities all the time.
There. That was a perfectly logical explanation. The reason why Jasper reminded her of Edward was because they behaved in the same manner, had similar reactions, and just happened to have the same article of clothing. Done. The end. Problem solved.
Except it wasn't. Despite her reasoning being completely plausible, Bella couldn't help but feel like it wasn't correct. There was something more to how Jasper and Edward were the same that she just wasn't getting.
"Well, what else could it be?" Bella asked herself loudly. "They have matching personalities – that's it! It's not like they're exactly the same person…"
And then suddenly, an idea hit her.
The man she had only seen again a few weeks ago made her think of the man she still loved…because they were one and the same.
Jasper was Edward.
Bella started laughing at her own thoughts. "Really?" she choked out. "That's the best you can come up with?! I need to stop watching the Sci-Fi channel. And sleep. God, I need sleep."
The more she thought about it, however, the more it seemed to be logical. Bella saw Edward's actions and heard his words through Jasper because they were Edward's. The smile, the pull, the mannerisms…it was all him.
And the coat! The damned coat she had given him some Christmases ago. Sure, it was probably just coincidence that Jasper owned the same kind in the same color, but what were the odds that it had the exact same coffee stain on the exact same sleeve as Edward's? Bella could still clearly remember the day she accidentally spilled her drink on the coat, and she could remember what the stain it left looked like, too.
Then there was the day when Bella broke down crying in Jasper's arms. He kept saying sorry in a tone so sincere that one might think he was the cause of her distress. What if he really was? If it truly was Edward acting at that time, then the apologies would make sense. And the way she felt comforted by his words…
But how is that possible? Edward and Jasper being the same person? Maybe they had switched personalities or something, like with Freaky Friday except the switch lasts for weeks instead of a day. Is that even a thing?
Already feeling crazy enough, Bella decided to take it up a notch and actually look up 'personality switch' on Google. She didn't find much save for a couple wikiHow articles about how to change your own temperament, and after Googling more ridiculous phrases like 'is it possible to switch bodies' and 'can personalities be copied', she was going nowhere.
Until she came across a site that discussed supernatural possession.
Bella had to admit, she was wary to click on the link at first. The idea of possession just sounded so…demonic. Seeing Paranormal Activity only days before didn't help either. After a second of hesitation, though, she entered the site anyway, thinking that she had already gone insane – might as well be thorough.
The website was surprisingly void of any pentagrams or dark imagery. In fact, the whole interface was actually quite relaxing with its calming background and simple font style, and this encouraged Bella to begin reading.
The blog post was titled Possession: The Soul's Second Chance and talked about the fifty-day journey a person went through following his death. According to the writer, people generally don't get the chance to walk the Earth a second time by possessing hosts, but those who do get the chance only do it because they have unfinished business or because it was not yet their time to die. They are therefore given fifty days to settle everything before finally being at peace, or even returning to their original bodies.
As Bella's eyes scanned through the article, more things began clicking in her head. Edward had been in an accident that could have been fatal, but it only left him in a coma. That meant that though his body was physically resting, his soul could still be wandering around.
Was it possible that he chose to possess Jasper to 'settle everything' and get back to his body?
"This is crazy," Bella shook her head. "This is absolutely crazy. What the hell am I doing?"
And with that, she shut her laptop off and headed to bed.
…
Bella kept thinking that her brain would come up with a better explanation for the whole Jasper-Edward debacle, but she was dead wrong. For some reason, no matter how hard she tried, she just couldn't shake off the possession theory.
And that was exactly why she spent the next two days silently watching Jasper's every move.
It wasn't easy – she had to resort to hiding from him as much as she could – but in the end, she was successful. That's what she thought, anyway. She had managed to observe him properly, at least, and though she only got to watch him for a few hours at a time, she still saw so much of Edward in the way he interacted with customers and co-workers.
So, what does that mean? That you now believe that Edward's soul has possessed Jasper's body so he can get back to his own?
When she saw Jasper run a hand through his hair – a very Edward thing to do – Bella knew the answer.
Yes, I do.
...
Bella was practically frozen as she stood outside of Northwestern. It wasn't because of the weather (thought the temperature was certainly beginning to drop), but it was because of her nerves.
"You're being silly," she whispered to herself. "It's just Edward. Or well, Edward's body, anyway."
Still, she couldn't help being a jittery mess. After finally accepting that the possession theory was true, she desperately wanted to see Edward – the real, physical him – but now, she was beginning to feel scared. Somehow, she felt like if she would come in contact with him, or even just be in the same room as him, something would happen. She didn't know what, but she was afraid to find out.
"Quit being such a wuss," Bella said more forcefully. "Nothing horrible's going to happen. Just go in there and do it."
Gathering as much courage as she could, she marched through the doors and managed to reach Edward's room in a few minutes. Nobody was in at the moment, but Bella was thankful for that. She didn't think she could handle putting up a front for Esme, or God forbid, Rosalie.
Bella took a deep breath before she approached the lone hospital bed in the room. Seeing Edward's form resting there stabbed her heart, but she kept moving forward until she was seated on a nearby chair.
"Hi," she greeted in whisper after a moment of silence. "Um…I…well, I'm sure you still remember, but…um…it's me. Bella.
"I know we haven't really talked much in the last couple of years, but…you're still my friend. My best friend. And I'm sorry that I let my feelings get in the way of that.
"I still saw you every day, you know. Still heard your voice in my head. Even when I tried to forget about you, you were still there. Never leaving me."
Bella tentatively reached out to hold one of Edward's hands. "And these past couple of weeks, I felt your presence even more – like you were there to really talk to me, physically hold me, apologize for…for…"
She inhaled sharply, and shook her head as if to shy away from her memories. When she spoke again, her voice was trembling.
"I- I miss you, Edward. I miss you so, so much. You're everything to me – you always have been – and I don't care if I'll only ever be your friend. Just please…come back."
A sob escaped Bella as tears began to flow freely down her cheeks. "Edward, please. Come back. I love you."
I know, l know. Long time, no post, and when I finally do, the update is short. So sorry for that, but all I can say is: finals hell weeks. That's right – more than one.
I promise to post a longer chapter as soon as I can after my exams :) Please pray for my accounting grade.