Dear Angel - Chapter 16

A/N: Alright, guys! This is Will's POV after reading Sonny's letter. It will continue in the next chapter as well, with him going to work and facing Sonny for the first time after reading his letter. There will also be some interaction between Will and Chad in the next chapter, which I hope I can put out tonight, or at the latest tomorrow morning. I am still not sure if I should do a Sonny POV where things left off with him realizing that he lost the letter and Will has probably already read the letter. Your feed-back about this would be very helpful. My personal opinion is that it's not needed because we already know without a doubt, that Sonny is terrified of losing Will and that he's going to have a difficult time to face him after this. But if you want a POV from Sonny, I will write it. Just let me know, okay? - Roxy

P.S. This chapter is not Beta. All mistakes are my own and I had to hurry to get this done this morning. Mama duties!

(Will's POV)

To say that I was angry after ready Sonny's letter was putting it rather mildly. I was infuriated and consumed with anger.

After the initial shock of finding out that Sonny was indeed My Anonymous, I grabbed the waste basket from the kitchen and walked over to the door and picked up the pieces of shattered glass off the floor, being extremely careful not to cut myself in the process. Once the floor was cleared off of all the evidence of my latest outburst caused by my lack of better judgement, I grabbed a roll of paper towels from under the sink and patted the floor dry and tossing the soiled towels in the waste basket before pushing it aside.

I sat for a few minutes with my back leaning up against the counter and desperately tried to make sense out of everything that had happened tonight. But somehow, nothing made sense to me anymore.

I was normally a calm and collective person when it came to controlling my anger. I was dealt with stressful and uptight situations on a daily basis. With corporate asshole breathing down your neck, telling you that "you better make sure you meet that dead line", or "you better make sure you seal that deal or else", was enough to infuriate anyone beyond their control. Despite that fact that on many occasions I had to bite my tongue back from telling them off, or hold myself back from punching the stupid smirks off their faces, I always managed to find a way to keep myself from boiling over and kept my raging temper under control.

However, this...reading this letter pushed me right over the edge.

This was something entirely different and something that I've never felt before.

I wondered if this is what it felt like to have a broken heart...

"How possibly stupid could I have been to not see this coming?", I asked myself repeatedly as I got up off of the floor and took a seat at the counter. I buried my face in my hands and took a few deep breaths to try to calm myself down before reading over the letter again.

Finally, after what seemed like hours, I slowly pulled my hands away from my face, and stared at the letter that laid there, flat-out on the counter.

I knew it was stupid of me to wanna read the letter over again. The right thing to do would have been to crumble it up, toss it in the trash, and just forget about it and simply move on. But there was something...something about Sonny's letter that made me wanna read it one last time...

I grabbed the letter off of the counter and headed straight to my room. I didn't even bother to change out of my cloths before getting under the covers, cause honestly, what would it change anyways? It's not like a change of clothing would change the fact that Sonny lied to me for an entire week, or that he lied to me about who he was, and somehow managed to use this to his own advantage to try to get me to fall in love with him.

Which almost worked, until...this letter.

I laid back and tried very hard to get comfortable as I got ready to read My Anon- I mean, Sonny's letter one last time before I made a decision whether or not I could get past this somehow, and forgive him for lying to me and pretending to be somebody that he wasn't.

I took a deep breath and started reading the letter out loud, hoping to find something written inside this letter that could possibly change my mind about giving up on something that for the first time in my life, felt real.

Our love for each other felt real. Sonny felt real...

The question now is, can I get over the all the lies and the betrayal the happened...

"Dear Angel, My name is Sonny Kiriakis, and I am the one that has written you all those love letters as your anonymous.

If you're reading this now, that probably means that I wasn't able to see passed my fear of being reject by you and tell you face to face about my identity. Guess that makes me a coward in every sense of the word.

I'm very sorry that I had no option other than this letter that I wrote today. I wish that I could have drawn up the courage to march up to you and tell everything that I felt for you from day one. Things could have been so different between us. Instead I chose to hide behind the letters, which was probably a bad decision on my behalf, cause now, I might have lots the only person that I've ever truly loved...

That's you My Angel...

"Sometimes it's hard to love someone because you're so afraid of losing them." ~ Anonymous.

But loving you, My Angel, was one of the easiest thing in the world for me. It was like breathing air into my lungs...

You're probably feeling very hurt and angry at me for lying to you about who I was and for keeping my anonymity a secret. That's completely understandable considering the circumstances of the relationship that we have together, or maybe I should say had...

Because now, I probably ruined any chance of a relationship with you by keeping my identity a secret, and for what it's worth, I'm truly am sorry...but sometimes, sorry just isn't enough...

My intention was never to hurt you, My Angel. All I wanted was to be able to love you like you deserved to be loved. I was so scared that once you found out who I was, that your feeling for me would change and that you wouldn't feel the same way about me anymore. I want you to know, that no matter what you decide after today, that my feelings for you will never change, My Angel. I will love you no matter what you decide.

All I can do now is pray to god that it's not to late for us.

"Sometimes you love something so much that it hurts to leave it, but you must. Sometimes it hurts too much to hold on to that thing you love. And sometimes you let go of what you love because it hurts, but then just sometimes you get it back and live happily ever after." ~ Anonymous.

That's all I can hope for now...

I know this isn't the happy ending you'd hoped for, and honestly, it's not the way I wanted things to end between us.

After reading this letter, you're probably never going to want to see me again or listen to anything that I have to say to say to you, but still, I need you to know that I meant every single word I wrote to you in those letters.

"True love doesn't have a happy ending, because true love never ends. Letting go is one way of saying I love you." ~ Anonymous.

I love you, My Angel...That's why I'm letting you go...

"I know that we can never turn back the pages of time, though we may wish that could be able to. To relive a happy moment, or to say goodbye one last time, but we never can, because the sands of time will continue to fall, and we can't turn the hour-glass over." ~ Anonymous.

I'm not going to beg for your forgiveness, nor am I going to beg you for a second chance. That would be very foolish and very selfish of me to ask this of you considering everything that I've done to cause this in the first place. I don't believe that I deserve your love after what I have done.

I broke us...

"When you are in love and you get hurt, it's like a cut. It will heal, but there will always be a scar." ~ Anonymous.

I have no one else to blame other that myself for what happened between us. But as the quote says, there will always be a scar. But scars heal, My Angel. I hope that with time, I will be able to reflect back on this day as something other than the day I broke your heart. Only time will tell how long that's going to take for us to get passed this, and to heal our broken hearts.

But one thing for sure though, is that I am never going to stop loving you or forget you, Will Horton. And despite everything that has happened between us, You will always, and forever be My Angel.

I love you...

And for what it's worth, I truly am sorry...

Your Anonymous,

Sonny Kiriakis.

I took the letter and placed it on the night table and turned off the lights. I laid back and thought about the things that Sonny said in his letter. I wiped away the tears from my eyes and buried my face under the covers, hoping that sleep would finally catch up with me at some point and that I could forget about all of this when I woke up in the morning.

However, that never happened...