You have no-one but me. The words resonate in my mind as I lie enfolded in the darkness. I know it's true.
I imagine sheep jumping fences, one by one, for hours.
I could have Foreman if I wanted. His interest is anything but discreet.
I don't want Foreman. Being a bitch keeps people at bay; Keeps them from discovering who I really am. Allison Cameron, however…Well, not even House could dissuade her from caring. I suspect, however, that her caring is a shield just as my bitchiness is. She gets what she wants…gets under people's skin – they don't get under hers. I doubt even Chase has, really.
Her stare follows me around the hospital. I pretend to ignore it.
Once in the hallway our eyes meet. I am surprised to see hurt in hers. It makes me interested.
I find her a few days later in the changing room. Her eyes hit the floor and stay there. I move in close beside her. My breath hits her ear as I speak, moving her blond hair. "You actually expected me to come to you" the phrase is somewhere between a question and a statement. I don't move. I'm too close for her. She fidgets uncomfortably but doesn't respond. I let a grin pass over my face, triumphant, and make my way to the door.
"We can't go through these things alone, you know."
I spin to find her watching me. "You do" I throw back.
A pained look crosses her features briefly. "I have…"
"Chase?" I cut her off. "Bull, Cameron." I chuckle coldly. "You're interested by people who don't want you. Like House." 'Like me' I almost add but don't. "Chase doesn't know you. He's convenient" I let the word hang, vicious. I'm being cruel but I don't care. I want a reaction. I don't get one. Her eyes betray nothing as she shoulders her bag and walks past me, silent.
Her stares continue to haunt me, fascination mixed with hurt. It makes me want to scream.
"What?!" I explode at her a few weeks later in the parking lot. She pulls out an earphone and looks up at me impishly.
"Yes?" she inquires, irritatingly polite.
"What do you want?" I demand.
She shrugs. "To understand" she replies simply. She gestures to the passenger side of her car.
I roll my eyes but walk around and climb in. "What do you want to understand?" Perhaps she'll leave me alone if I answer…
"Why" she replies, a glance to my lap indicating her meaning.
It is my turn to shrug. "If you don't know I can't explain it." I answer truthfully. Green eyes examine me again and determine I am telling the truth. I glare. "Will you leave me alone now?" I demand.
She shakes her head. "No."
My eyes narrow. "For the love of God why not? I gave you your answer!"
She doesn't respond. Perhaps she doesn't know. I watch her carefully and eventually her green eyes turn to meet my blue ones. Unconcealed interest lies there. But interest in what? The question forms on my lips. "Why do you care?" My voice is a whisper.
She shakes her head, as confused as me. "I don't know."