This chapter is dedicated to saraofearth, who gave me the best review ever and inspired me to finish up this chapter!
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"Roy? Where are you going?" Ed called sleepily from his room.
"Hush, Ed. I'm going to work. Go back to sleep."
"Let me come with you," Ed whined.
"What? Why? Don't you want to sleep?" Roy ran a comb through his hair and then tucked it into his pocket, entering Ed's room and looking down into the mess of blankets on Ed's bed.
"I'm bored. I can't sleep and Al says he's tired of taking me places but I'm tired of reading. Can't I walk yet?"
"No, Ed, you can't put weight on that ankle. And coming to work with me would be far duller than staying here with your lovely teacher. I need you to make sure she doesn't do anything insane in my house," Roy told the boy, pawing gently through the blankets before finally laying his hands on a black tank top and a stomach. He pulled the blankets off Ed's groggy face and straightened them over the blond.
"But she won't let me do anything..." Ed yawned up at Roy.
"Your ankle will heal faster if you rest it."
"But I'm bored."
"Where's Al?" Roy asked, stroking Ed's hair away from his face.
"Downstairs. He got tired of playing 20 questions last night and stayed down there."
"It's still early, go back to sleep," Roy said, smoothing Ed's hair with his hand.
"Why?" Ed tugged on Roy's sleeve.
"Because I said so," Roy chuckled, leaning down to nuzzle Ed and give him a hug. "I've got to go now," he said, pulling away and leaving the room. Ed didn't say anything more. It was still dark and he fell asleep to the sound of Roy brushing his teeth.
"Be glad you haven't been promoted, Lieutenant. One day it will happen, mark my words. Then you'll be the one sitting here nursing paper cuts while tirelessly struggling through all of these reports," Roy yelled after Riza after she brought him a new stack of papers and went back to the main office room she and the other four of Roy's minions shared.
As she shut the door, Roy thought he heard an exclamation of surprise, but chose to ignore it as he looked over the stack of reports he'd requested.
A moment later, Roy heard shouts and gunshots from the main office, which he simply could not ignore. He opened the door and saw that Riza was the only person standing. Fuery, Bred and Falman were hiding under the big table-desk in the middle of the room and Ed and Jean were holding up shields made of a mysterious substance while they cowered in separate corners, Ed behind the couch.
"What are you doing here, Ed?" Roy inquired as Riza lowered her gun. Ed only answered with pleading golden eyes. Roy came over and lifted Ed onto the couch, taking away his metal shield. Strange metal, one he'd never felt before.
"The Major and the Second Lieutenant here were just having a swordfighting contest," Riza said to Roy as Jean reluctantly handed her his shield and blunt sword. Roy saw Ed's in the corner.
He raised his eyebrows at Ed and the boy's expression went from shamefaced to shocked to worried in one facial stride.
"We were just playing, Roy," Ed pleaded.
"How did you get here?" Roy asked. Ed grinned.
"I called the pizza place nearby and when they delivered, I made the pizza boy give me a ride. It was on his way."
Roy blinked. As he didn't know how he should respond to that, he said the first thing that came to his mind.
"Why are you swordfighting with Jean? You used to be scared of him."
"WHAT!" Ed yelled.
"Really?" Jean asked.
"Royyyy," Ed whined, begging him not to tell Jean.
"Um..."
"Were you scared of me?" Jean asked, walking over and picking Ed up. Ed kicked and shook his head and Jean rocked him in his arms.
"Put me down!"
"Jean put Ed on the couch and let him use my lawnmower to make shields and swords!" Breda complained. Roy stared at him.
"Your lawnmower?"
"I brought it in to work so Kain could fix it for me," Heymans grumbled.
"Ah. I...see..." Roy said, nodding his head.
"I can fix it," Ed told Jean, wriggling until the other blond set him down on the couch, being very careful with Ed's ankle. Ed took the two swords and shields and transmuted them into a machinal monster.
It had four wheels under a squarish platform, but there its resemblance to any lawnmower mankind had ever seen ended. The platform was rimmed with steel teeth, gleaming like evil chompers of death. Breda started shaking, his hands balled into fists.
"You think that's funny?" he yelled at Ed who scooted close to Roy.
"I don't know, that's close, right?"
"Colonel," Breda snapped, "Do something."
Roy smiled and shook his head at them. "You can take some money for a new one out of Ed's research account. I think you learned something from this experiment," he said to Breda and Ed, smiling humorously. "Why don't you two go now and the Second Lieutenant can take a lunch break."
Ed looked surprised and Breda looked irritated.
"Go on, the State Alchemist's office is just on the second floor, you know where it is." Roy held Ed up on one foot and Ed reached for the crutch he'd transmuted that morning. He sighed as he wobbled out the door.
Breda didn't wait for him pretty soon Ed realized he couldn't see he man head of him. He must've already gotten in to the elevator. Ed bit his lip, halting for a moment before sitting down in the middle of the hallway and using some of the tile floor and his crutch to transmute a large skateboard thing. Sitting on top of it, Ed used his hands to push himself and went flying past the people in the hallway toward the elevator. He saw Breda angrily holding the door for him, but he hadn't estimated the distance correctly and went flying past into the wall. He yelped as the contact between wall and skateboard jolted his ankle and he was bumped off onto the floor, laying still for a moment to calm down and assess the damage.
His ankle was throbbing badly and his arm hurt where he had fallen on top of it, but other than that he was fine. He heard people in the hallway laughing as he pushed himself to a sitting position and turned to see Breda walking quickly toward him.
Ed opened his mouth to defend himself, but the redhaired man simply put one hand under Ed's back and another under the boy's knees, lifting him, although not as easily as Roy or Jean did.
"Mmph. Come on, we'll get your skateboard on the way back," Breda sounded resigned as he waddled to the elevator and waited for it to come down again.
"You don't have to carry me."
"Do you want to walk?"
Ed didn't really have an answer to that.
"You don't mind when the colonel or Havoc carry you and if you're too banged up when we get back, they'll probably blame me," Breda sighed. Ed leaned on him, noticing how different Breda felt than Jean or Roy. More cushy. He shook his head.
"I don't think so. Roy wold blame me, anyway."
"Hmph. You're a big kid," Breda grunted as he tried to shift Ed's weight to make it easier on his arms.
Ed didn't mean to giggle, but somehow the sound escaped even without his authorization. Breda called him big!
Heymans snorted with laughter at Ed's giggle and finally stepped onto the elevator.
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"Colonel Mustang speaking... What do you mean? ... What? Second Lieutenant Breda? ...OK, hang on." Roy hung up the phone and yelled, "Havoc, Fuery, go to the phone booth on the fourth floor and see if either FullMetal or Breda are up there."
"I thought he'd been gone awhile," Kain commented as he and Jean exchanged looks while walking to the elevator.
When the doors opened on the fourth floor, Jean stepped out of the elevator, then jumped backward onto Kain.
A blur of colors: red, orangey-red, black, yellow, blue, went zooming by the two officers. IT also appeared to be screaming.
"STOP LEANING, AAUGH!"
"DON'T STICK YOUR ARMS OUT, YOU'LL KILL SOMEONE!"
The blur also left a scorch trail on the clean tile of the hallway. Kain and Havoc followed it, running at top speed until they somehow circled back to the elevator without getting close to it. Fuery suggested they wait for it to make a loop again and then catch it when it came around. Jean nodded, unable to speak for panting. They both took off their jackets and waited.
When they heard the screams again, they raised their jackets and then threw the jackets over the screaming projectile. The screams became louder and exponentially more frantic as the third scorch trail on the floor began to zigzag. There was a BOOM! and then the hallway filled with smoke.
Havoc and Fuery jogged to the crash site just in time to see a window be transmuted in the wall to let the worst of the smoke out. Breda met Jean and Kain carrying on his shoulder, the two of them coughing as they led the way back to the elevator.
"Hey, Havoc. cough."
"Hi, Breda. Whatcha doin'?" Jean replied.
"Oh... Just playing."
Ed stopped coughing and suddenly started laughing like a crazy person. Jean raised an eyebrow.
"Can I take that for you?" he offered Heymans. The smaller man was red in the face and he nodded, grateful to be relieved of the weight.
Ed wriggled and continued to laugh while Jean settled him against his shoulder and situated his arms under Ed, holding him like a baby.
"Alright, alright, settle down and tell me what you were doing," Jean commanded Ed. The man saw tears well in up the corners of Ed's eyes as the boy started kicking with joy and shaking his head. Jean looked to Breda.
"Um, his idea. Rocket blaster on the back of the skateboard."
"Good grief..." Havoc shook his head. "I'm taking you guys back to the colonel."
Ed just continued his current pattern: laugh extremely hard, them gasp for breath. Breda's mouth twitched to a smile.
"So. Which one of you first suggested attaching a mini-rocket-blaster engine onto the back of your giant skateboard? I need to get this story straight so I can explain this to the higher-ups," Roy said to the two apprehended daredevils on his couch. They pointed at eachother.
"Breda said it would be more fun if it had an engine!"
"He said he knew how to use water and some metal to make a rocket blaster!"
"OK... How many laps did you make around the fourth floor? I don't even want to know why you were up near Information..."
"Three laps," Ed said.
"How much damage did you do?"
The two looked at eachother.
"Scorch marks," Ed said.
"Took out a door someone left open," Breda said.
"Did we rip Fuery's jacket?" Ed asked Breda.
"I think we might have. Actually, wasn't it still on the front when the engine exploded?"
"Yeah. And then I transmuted a hole in the wall to let the smoke out."
"Oh God..." Roy put his head in his hands.
"You shouldn't have even tried to put a steering wheel on there, it would have worked better if we'd just leaned." Breda glared at Ed.
"Did it feel like sledding to you? No way we would have avoided Mrs. Hughes," Ed snapped.
"Your steering still gave her a heart attack. I think the lieutenant colonel threw a knife or two into the back wheel."
Roy started rythymically banging his head on his desk.
"Yeah...Sorry," both culprits told him at the same time.
"Speak of the devil," Riza poked her head into Roy's office, "Hughes is here to see you."
"Bring him in." Roy sounded tired.
"I'm going to make sure you never see the light of day again." Maes Hughes walked into the office, sweat and veins standing out on his face. "You nearly scared my beautiful wife to death. Can you imagine the tragedy? My little Elysia could have been left motherless!"
"We weren't expecting her to come out of your office. We thought she'd hear us screaming and stay inside until we got past," Ed defended Breda and himself. Hughes' eye twitched and Roy stood up.
"If Gracia needs anything at all, please advise her to request it of these two. How is she doing?" He tried to sound sincere.
"Hm... She says she's fine but I'm sure she could use to be waited on hand and foot for a few weeks."
"How about just for today?" Roy negotiated.
"It would be a start," Maes conceded.
Ed and Breda looked at eachother.
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Now Hughes will have his way with Ed and Breda! What ever will they be forced to do?
XD
R&R please!
