Alright!! Who's ready for another chapter?

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"Hey, wait!" Ed fairly shrieked, struggling off the couch. "You can't leave me with my feet stuck together!"

"I know you don't want me to, but the boss might not stay too angry at me if he knows I made sure you couldn't booby trap his house."

"I still have alchemy!" Ed pleaded, trying to convince Jean there was no reason to leave him shackled.

"Sorry, Ed, gotta go."

Ed stared as the door slammed shut and the lock clicked.

Mason ran across the street, no longer taking any chances that Central's drivers would bother to avoid him should he not cross in the absolute shortest time possible.ยจ

'Just a little further, almost to the house.'

If it weren't for a certain, special someone, Mason would have been well and ready to get back to Dublith where the honking of car horns was a rare noise.

He took out his spare key and unlocked the door, quickly slipping inside to the sound of... fireworks?? Crashing, banging noises were coming from the kitchen and Mason suddenly realized that he was inside a house- with a real live burglar!!

He took of his shoes so he could use them to knock the thief unconscious and then crept out of the entranceway only to find Ed sitting on the kitchen floor holding one large metal stock pot over his head with both hands in preparation to slam it down onto another stock pot rolling on its side in front of him.

BANG BANG BANG CRASH BANG BANG

Ed mercilessly battered the pot on the floor, the one he was holding also sustaining damage in the form of dents and dings. He didn't even notice Mason watching him.

After several more minutes of pot banging, Ed picked up a long, thick wooden spoon beside him and held up one of Roy's plastic cups, all of which were scattered on the ground around him. He tossed the plastic cup in the air and batted it with the spoon, sending it shooting into the fireplace. Mason ran for his life as one sailed into the railing on the staircase and bounced into the laundry room.

When Roy came home and turned on the lights, the first thing he saw was Edward fast asleep on the kitchen floor, surrounded by all of Roy's pots, pans, plastic cups and wooden spoons. The largest wooden spoon's head had been broken off and was lying near Ed's foot.

Roy was so tired he just wanted to lie down next to Ed and crash but something told him he wouldn't be very comfortable. So instead, he left the blond and went upstairs and crashed in his own bed.

Roy was woken from his death-like sleep by strange little noises and a bright pair of yellow eyes next to him.

When he rolled over to stare at the eyes, the whole creature began to move away and Roy reached out to grab it before it could disappear into the dark.

Ed felt Roy grab the back of his neck and a shock of protest jolted him when he realized it was still sore from when Roy had been holding him there earlier. He gave a tiny whine and let Roy pull him closer, shaking his head a bit to see if Roy would be willing to let go. Roy's grip tightened and Ed bit his lip, knowing he shouldn't have come in here but... But he knew Roy was home and Roy had promised...

"Ed...?"

"Mm-hm," Ed replied, feeling guilty he'd woken Roy when the Flame didn't want to see him.

"What are you doing in here?"

"When did you get home?" Ed tried to distract him.

"Uh, hours ago...maybe. You were- what were you doing with my cups and pots?"

Ed squirmed and tried to lift Roy's arm away but Roy kept a firm grip, his barely visible expression demanding an answer.

"Just- just playing..." Ed shook his head again and Roy pulled against his neck, causing Ed to utter a tiny, "Mmf" of weak protest.

"Ed-" Roy warned.

"Roy! Let go, that hurts," he cried.

"You know I'll let go if you answer my question!"

"I was taking it out on them." He suddenly folded his arms stubbornly.

"What?"

"I was taking it out on them." It was obviously all he was going to say, but Roy thought he sort of knew what that meant. Maybe.

"OK, then, why are you in here?"

"Because you said.." Ed sounded very accusing and Roy guessed, "You want to cuddle?"

Ed didn't reply.

When Ed had caused a scene earlier that day, Roy had been seriously considering withholding cuddles for a few days but at the moment he couldn't really see how that would do anyone any good. He let go of Ed's neck and patted the space beside him.

Ed started to climb in when Roy stopped him.

"Hey, wait a minute, don't get in while you're still dressed!"

"But Roy!"

"Nuh-uh. Don't you have pajamas?"

"No."

"Transmute the ones in the top drawer of bureau then." Roy was too tired to get up himself. Ed opened the drawer and got up on his tiptoes to reach the fire truck pajamas folded inside. Roy was wearing a nice black set he'd just bought and was not grateful he hadn't burned the fire truck ones.

Ed transmuted them and ran back into his own room to change. On his way back, he heard a funny noise... He could hear Roy breathing but he could also hear... snoring!

"Roy!" he scurried back into the room and turned the light on, blinding Roy.

"Agg, Ed! Turn it off!"

"There's someone in the other room!" Ed flapped his arms, looking ridiculous in his little flannel pajamas.

"Yeah, I know, now turn off the damn lights," Roy said shortly.

"You know?" Ed crept closer to Roy, looking over his shoulder.

"The Curtises left Mason here."

"Really?" Ed crept out of the room.

"Ed! Get back here, what are you doing?" Roy hissed, sitting up.

Ed opened the door to the inhabited guest room and peered into the darkness. Creeping a little closer, he tripped on a suitcase and banged his head on the corner of the bureau. Mason snorted quite loudly in his sleep and Ed squeaked and made time getting back into Roy's room and jumping into the bed next to the dreary-faced Mustang.

"You didn't wake him up, did you?" he asked Ed. Ed shook his head 'no'.

"What was that loud thump?"

"I tripped and hit my head on the dresser."

Roy looked sympathetic. He reached behind Ed and pulled his hairband out. "Come on, go to sleep," Roy said as he lay down. "But first, turn off that light."

4:00 AM:

Ed kicked off the covers to let cool air in while snuggling closer to Roy's warm body and for the forty-ninth time in as many minutes, Roy grabbed the covers and threw them back straight.

Ed sighed and Roy let his own head drop back down onto the pillow, thinking the sound had been a relaxed, sleepy sigh.

Really it had been more of an 'I'm-hot' sigh. Ed lifted his right leg and sent the blankets sailing over onto Roy.

"Ed..." Roy growled.

"No!" Ed refused, having predicted banishment from Roy's tone of voice.

"You are torturing me!" Roy rolled over angrily, dragging Ed with him.

"It's hot," Ed whined.

"Well don't get so close."

"That would defeat the purpose!"

"Go sleep in your own bed. Open the window for all I care."

"I'm opening your window." Ed got on his knees and reached for the window next to Roy's bed.

"Oh, no you don't." Roy seized him by the waist and slammed him back down onto the bed.

"Roy!"

"The noise keeps me awake."

"Well you didn't have to-"

"I'm not arguing with you. Not now. Go to bed."

Ed sat up and stared at the already dozing Roy, battling dual emotions of rejection and annoyance.

"Go awayyyy," Roy moaned.

"No!" Ed flopped on top of Roy and wrapped his arms firmly around the sleepy colonel, satisfying both a desire to be close to Roy and also one to exact vengeance on the annoying man.

"Ed! I need sleep!"

"What if I don't want you to sleep?" Ed churned out an easily adaptable line that he sometimes used when he was biding time for his brain to come up with something better to say.

"Oh, go away. I mean it, that's enough. Leave me alone."

Ed didn't move.

"Edward Elric, you had better disappear pretty damn fast right about now."

"Um." More than a little taken aback, Ed shuffled off the bed.

"Thank you. Goodnight," Roy told him on his way out, softening the deserved rejection.

5:00 AM:

"It's these damned flannel pajamas!" Ed growled, stripping them off with disdain before toppling over on top of his bed and dozing off happily at last. Damn things, but he wasn't going to cuddle up to Roy in his shorts!!

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Roy dragged himself down the stairs to the fridge and opened it, staring deadly at it for several minutes in search of breakfast. Finally, Ed interrupted him, having been waiting at the kitchen table for Roy to come down just in case the man tried to leave without him.

"Roy? Are you hungry?"

Roy slowly twisted his neck to stare at Ed.

"What are you doing up?" he croaked.

"I'm- I'm coming with you!" Ed suddenly seemed unsure.

"Oh, no, Ed, please!" Roy groaned, plopping into a chair clearly wishing Ed wouldn't.

"But I'll help this time! Really, I can help!"

"Ed, your handwriting is so bad I can't let you sign anything, Hawkeye transports all the documents already-, I mean," Roy stopped there. Ed got up and pulled an apple out of the fridge, turning on Roy after he'd washed it.

"All of your other subordinates get paperwork of their own, isn't that right?"

"Don't play dumb, Ed. I've been taking care of yours for years."

"I know. But I can do it for now. Let me!"

Roy shook his head. "You wouldn't know what to do with them."

"Why-" Ed suddenly faltered, "Why can't you teach me? You know I can learn fast when I have to."

Roy sighed. "Can't you just leave it? Go back to bed, sleep late and go explore the city with Mason or something."

Ed was silent. After a moment, he put the apple down on the counter and walked back upstairs.

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"Boss, you gotta let off some steam," Jean informed a raging pyromaniac of a colonel when he brought him his coffee.

"This day even started badly!" Roy yelled, ready and willing to unload on Havoc. "You have no idea what it's like to have to deal with Ed! All of a sudden, he always wants to be near me! After years of hating my guts and avoiding me like the plague and now he desperately follows me to work! Work! Where I don't pay attention to him, where he always gets in trouble- ugh! When I tell him no, he begs and pleads and then he gets mad at me! But I can't have him in here humming and yelling and doing stupid things that distract everyone and I don't trust him with paperwork!"

"Bait and swap," said a voice from the next room, obviously having overheard Roy's rant.

"What?" Roy asked dully. Breda appeared in the doorway.

" 'S a kid thing. Bait and swap. You say, 'You can have this if you give me this'."

Roy frowned slightly.

"So find something he wants and tell him, 'You can have this if you stay here and wait,' or whatever."

"Hm... I guess it's worth a try but thanks to this morning I already know I'm going to come home to a mess."

Jean grunted, "Better drink your coffee while it's still wake-me-up burning hot."

Roy raised his mug to that and winced as the hot liquid burned the roof of his mouth.

So Mustang didn't need his help? Didn't want him around? Well that was just fine with Edward Elric because it just so happened that unlike a certain bastard colonel, his brother really did need him.

"One ticket to Risembool," Ed demanded loudly of the girl at the ticket booth. She flinched at his tone and wordlessly traded him a ticket for the money he was holding out.

During the train ride, no one dared sit anywhere near the FullMetal Alchemist. He sat up for the whole ride, neither dozing nor thinking, just sitting on the train.

When he finally arrived in Risembool, Ed didn't stop at Winry's house. He went straight East, looking for any clues Al might have left him. He hadn't asked his little brother to leave a trail, but Ed hoped he'd thought to do it anyway.

The first possible clue he found was a three by three foot pit dug in the sand with one little green shoot growing in the very middle. Ed didn't know what else it could be, so he assumed he was going in the right direction.

"Wish me luck, Lieutenant."

Riza smiled a bit, "Good luck, Sir. Try to get some sleep."

Roy nodded and picked up his jacket to leave. He walked home, feeling more anxious by the minute. Ed always took things so hard...

He noticed Mason scurrying across the street ahead of him and blinked at the man's back, wondering why he was running. It was a warm night, no reason to be escaping from the weather. He broke into a jog to follow more closely and caught up with Mason at the door.

"Hey, Roy. Gettin' back late again?"

"Same as you. Why are you running?"

Mason laughed nervously. "I'm sure I seem like a real hick, but I swear those drivers are trying to mow me down!"

"Oh," Roy laughed. "Traffic here is definitely more of a hazard than it is out in the country."

"You're telling me!"

"So, did you and Edward speak to each other this morning?" Roy asked quickly, hoping to get his answer before entering the house.

"Oh, no. He was gone by the time I got up."

Roy frowned imperceptibly. "When did you get up?"

"A-around eight or so," Mason replied, confusion showing through in his voice.

Roy opened the door quickly. He had a gut feeling Ed had gone somewhere as soon as he left and probably wasn't back yet.

"Ed?" he called. No answer. Mason watched Roy check the kitchen and laundry room and caught on wordlessly; he checked upstairs and he and Roy met in the hallway. Mason shook his head and Roy's jaw tightened.

"He gone somewhere. Possibly Risembool and if he did then he's headed for the desert."

"Where everyone's disappearing?" Mason went wide eyed.

"Exactly. That's where his brother is."

Mason sputtered uselessly, realizing there wasn't much they could do. Roy was feeling even worse. There was just no way he could leave his office right now to go looking for Ed, even if Ed was right in the middle of the mess he was working on.

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Whew!! Finally finished typing that up!

And before anyone asks, this is a COMPLETELY, 100 percent Parental fic!!! Ed sleeping with Roy does not mean...erg, that he's sleeping with Roy. Got me?

Thanks for reading!