"LolomgwtgDairyQueenlolomgwtgbbdq." Someone was singing in a rather good voice. Axel squinted, wondering if he was hearing things. The song made no sense whatsoever.
It was a typical night in the World's End Tavern. The smoke was heavy and the crowd was as mixed as it was possible to be without a blender being involved. At a nearby table, a pair of tiny guardian dragon spirits were squaring off for a bought of fisticuffs. People around them were already taking bets on the outcome. Suddenly a wizard staggered up from the bar and started to scream an incantation as the bartender cut him off. Axel winced… the bar was protected, but still… but a witch down the bar idly pointed a finger at the wizard and muttered a cantrip. The wizard doubled over in a massive sneezing fit, and the bouncer hit him neatly over the back of the head. There was clapping as the bouncer dragged him out to dump in the alley. The witch got a free drink for her help.
"Wizards have no business drinking if they can't hold their booze." Axel remarked, drinking his Demon's Tears. "How do you like the Winter Wine, Sora?" They were celebrating a bit, so Axel had gotten them a bottle of the Winter Wine to share. Sora beamed.
"It's great! I love it." Roxas sipped his carefully, savoring the flavor. They wouldn't be able to get a second bottle. After this, if they wanted something, they'd have to settle for a lesser vintage. Sora wasn't as careful, and Axel winced a little as he gulped his wine. Still, he was definitely enjoying it.
It was six months later, and their training was going much better than Axel had dared hope. Mongo and Kilsera were just giving Sora and Roxas finishing touches now… and Axel himself was sparring with them both. They would be able to end the lessons early, and that meant they would still have a bit of a nest egg when they started looking for work. That was good, since it wasn't necessarily easy for brand new mercenaries to find work. You got a reputation over time. Although being trained with Mongo and Kilsera would help.
"Axel!" Axel looked up with a blink as someone very familiar arrived at his table. The tanned skin, brilliant grin and spiky red hair were unmistakable.
"Rude. How's it going?" He glanced over to the door, but couldn't see Doctor Rufus. "Where's your boss?" That was a bit odd. The good doctor could usually be counted on to show up for alcohol. Rude shrugged, grabbing a chair and sitting down.
"He's got a girl these days. She's traveling with us." Rude grinned, a touch evilly. "She's my girl too." Axel blinked, but quickly understood. Rufus and Rude were lovers and in love, although neither one was prepared to admit it. But they both liked girls just fine as well. "You know her, her name is Froggy." Axel blinked again, then laughed. Given what he know of Froggy's sexual preferences and love of action, she was probably fitting in like jam on toast. Rufus must have purchased her contract. Probably at a cut rate, since her first owner had lost half his payment.
"Sounds great! Good for you. Froggy's the best. But did you want something? …Besides a free drink." He said dryly as Rude stole a small glass of winter wine. Rude grinned, sipping it slowly.
"Actually, yeah. The good doctor is putting together an expedition in a few months, and I heard you're about ready to take off. He might be willing to give you a down payment to come along. This looks to be a really good one." Roxas and Sora both looked interested at that, but Axel was dubious. A good one by Rufus Shinra's standards was a horrible one by most normal people standards. And Rude's standards were just as skewed.
"What do you mean by a good one?" He asked, and Rude grinned.
"Suspicious! Well, you see, the good doctor has found a world that was just recently connected to the Twisted World. It's a rather remarkable place, and they're already trading plenty of precious metals, gems and biological, ahem, items. Furs and whatnot. But you wouldn't believe the quality! Anyway, tourism isn't being allowed because apparently this place is very odd. There's some kind of ambient power, and if you stay there long enough you start turning into demons or angels, depending on where you live. Although all that means is you adapt to hot or cold, and get a few extra powers, apparently." Axel frowned. This sounded odd, but it was no stranger than Mongo and Kilsera's homeworld. He nodded and gestured for Rude to continue. "Now, peace has broken out between the demons and angels recently. Something about someone named Bon-Bon. Be that as it may, that means the demons are launching all kinds of trips into the deep south to find and bring back those biological riches I mentioned. Over half the expeditions aren't coming back, so it's a bit rough down there. Normally we'd never get to go on a safari there, but Rufus went and talked to the High Lord personally. And amazingly, he's your dop alt! What a thing."
"Mine?!?" Axel blinked, a bit taken aback. His one experience with dop alts had been anything but positive. The man had screamed something at him about why did he have a heart, and promptly tried to remove it. Mongo had needed to half kill him to make him go away. "You're kidding, I hope." Rude smiled and shook his head. "We're not going."
"Oh, come on Axel. You won't meet him and he's alright. Rufus already mentioned you to him." Axel glowered, quietly wishing a plague of fleas on Doctor Shinra. "The High Lord gave us permission to go, but we have to be in the Dark Land a few months before we start to adapt to the heat. Otherwise we'd choke… apparently, the air gets thicker the farther South you go. Fortunately, adapting to the heat and pressure happens quickly."
"Why did the High Lord give you permission to… oh. You're going to catalogue things for him, aren't you." Axel sighed to himself. Rufus wasn't interested in money… he was already stinking, filthy rich. He was a scientist and explorer, and he loved finding treasures, be they new animals or ancient ruins. He reminded Axel of Indiana Jones… only worse.
"Indeed. Apparently, even though he trusts plenty of the demons that are going down there, they have all the scientific sense of a bunch of rabid raccoons. So he's willing to let Doctor Shinra have a go." Rude said cheerfully. "So. Are you interested? We're paying a fee up front, and a percentage of the profits." Axel considered. It would be very dangerous, or Rude wouldn't be approaching them.
"How much money are we talking about?" Axel asked, and Rude named a figure that made him blink. "…Huh." It was very good money. And that wasn't counting the percentage. "Ah… we'll have to talk about it. Will you be here tomorrow?"
"Of course! And the rest of the week too, most likely. Froggy and Rufus should be by tomorrow, too." Rude stood, grinning. "See you later then." Axel watched him go thoughtfully, and sighed to himself.
A safari in an unknown world filled with demons… and half the expeditions didn't make it back. It would be dangerous, alright. Yet somehow, he was sure they would go.
Maybe it was fate.
Riku leaned against a building, and spat, nailing a roach dead on. Pests were a major problem in the Twisted World. With all the travel between different worlds, it was probably inevitable that every rat, bug and fungus known to man would show up eventually. If there was one profession that was never lacking for work, it was the exterminators.
She, on the other hand, was just getting by. Being a bouncer at a local titty bar was getting seriously wearing. Especially when the customers figured out she was a girl. Riku was sick to death of being called a bull dike as she threw someone out. It made her want to kick some serious balls.
"I need a new job." She mumbled to herself, then sighed. Breaking into the mercenary trade without any references was turning out to be harder than she expected. Her keyblade should have been a plus, but half the people she spoke to didn't even seem to know what a keyblade was. But at least her job as a bouncer was paying the bills, and hopefully she'd find something better soon.
"You are dead!" There was a scream nearby. Everyone on the road ignored it, and Riku was tempted to ignore it too… but then she heard a familiar voice begging and pleading.
"I'm sorry! I'm sorrysorrysorry! Please don't hurt me Axel please!" It was Sora. Riku still hesitated until she heard another scream. Then she swore and called in her keyblade. It undoubtedly wasn't HER Sora, but she still had to do something.
When she reached the alley, she immediately spotted the problem… a man with red, spiky hair had Sora pinned against the wall and was shaking him violently as the brunette cried pathetically. Little sparks were dancing in his hair. But he hadn't actually harmed Sora yet, and Riku licked her lips before sneaking up behind him. Sora spotted her and his eyes widened… just as she slammed him over the head with the flat side of the Way to Dawn. The redhead went down like a sack of grain, and Sora screamed again.
"Axel!" He was kneeling beside the red haired man, and Riku blinked. "What did you do that for?!?" He yelled at her, and she rocked back on her heels for a moment. Had she misread this completely? Had this been some bizarre lovers spat?
"He was hurting you." Riku pointed out reasonably. Sora winced, looking down.
"I deserved it… hey, are you Riku? You look a little different." Sora stared at her for a moment, and suddenly blinked. "Hey, you're a girl!" Riku tensed, giving him a dirty look.
"Thank you for pointing that out. I wouldn't have noticed." Sora winced, realizing he'd offended her, and hastily tried to explain.
"I'm sorry! But I met another Riku in another world and he was a boy so it was a surprise." Riku frowned, but relaxed a little. That was a better reason for mistaking her for a boy than most. "I think Axel's okay…" Sora looked at his friend with a woebegone expression, and Riku kneeled down to check. He was breathing easily and she thought he looked fine, although he was probably going to have quite a knot on his head.
"He's fine. Now why do you deserve to be treated like that?" She asked, and Sora flushed, looking away.
"I… I did something terrible." Sora whispered the next part, and Riku had to lean close to hear, her silvery hair brushing his face. "They were out of lube so I gave them… I thought it was lube. But it was… glue." Riku blinked, as her mind tried to rearrange that sentence a few ways. No matter how she worked at it, it wouldn't come out right.
"Glue. As lube." She tried to imagine what would happen, and failed utterly. "…Was it painful?" Sora nodded, tears filling his eyes.
"Roxas is in the infirmary and I'm so sorry!" He started to cry, and Riku hesitated before she pulled him into a hug, gently patting his back.
"I'm sure he'll forgive you once he's feeling better." Actually, she wasn't sure of that at all. What had happened? She didn't want to know and her imagination just wasn't up to the task. "Here, I'll help you carry your friend here home. You said his name was Axel?" Sora nodded, and Riku sighed. "I knew an Axel, but he died."
"That's terrible. Axel's a really great guy and he loves Roxas so much…" Between the two of them, they managed to carry the lanky redhead back to a black stone building. As soon as they stepped inside, the girl manning the front desk went into hysterical giggles.
"H-h-hi Sora! Oh, Roxas wants to see you. Something about shoving something up your ass." She managed to say brightly as Roxas spikes drooped to the point that his hair was nearly flat. "I see you've managed to take out Axel, good job!" Then she dissolved into giggles again. Riku hesitated, then shrugged. It hurt a bit, but… this Sora wasn't her Sora. So…
"Why don't we make ourselves scarce for a while?" She suggested to Sora, then spoke to the girl. "Can you get him to the infirmary?" If Roxas was there at this moment, that probably wasn't where Sora wanted to be. She nodded with a grin. "Thanks. C'mon… lets go get some Sea Salt ice cream." Sora brightened at that.
"Thanks Riku!" He grabbed her arm, and Riku smiled through the pain in her heart. He was so cute… the way Sora had been, before they had needed to save the world. She could feel him catching her heart all over again, and wanted to cry. But she was helpless to resist… Sora had always been her sunshine, and despite the pain, she had missed him so.
It would all end the same way. There was no real hope. But for now, at least, Riku could have a friend.
"Hey Riku… you have a keyblade, right?" Sora asked as they ate the Sea Salt ice cream out of waffle bowls. Riku nodded. She hadn't had the blade out long in the alleyway, so maybe Sora had missed it. "Where'd you get it?" Riku tilted her head… she had a feeling the question had more behind it than idle curiosity. But she shrugged.
"Well, the first blade I had was the Soul Eater. It's a long story, but I can tell you if you have time." Of course, right now Sora had nothing but time. It was going to take a while for his friends to calm down. He beamed at her.
"Sure!" Riku sighed and related the story of Kingdom Hearts. It took a while, and she edited some of it… she hated to look like a complete bitch, although she had been part of the time. But mostly, she stuck to the truth and by the end of it Sora was gaping at her. But he seemed… happy? "Wow, you must be really good with your keyblade then, right?"
"You might say so. Why?" Riku tilted her head to one side, sure now that he was asking for a reason. Sora beamed again.
"We've got a friend who's putting together a safari! We've decided to go, so we're going to be leaving next week. But maybe you could come too if you want? It's going to be super dangerous but it's a lot of money." Riku blinked. A safari? That sounded… interesting actually. She'd always loved seeing new places.
"How much money are we talking about?" Sora told her, and Riku whistled. "I'm in, if he wants me. How do I get in touch with this guy?"
"Just come to the World's End Tavern tonight." Sora assured her. "We'll all be there. Err… we might all be there." He amended. Axel and Roxas might not be up for it and if they were… Sora might be there. He might not be able to walk if Roxas caught him. "Just ask for Rude and Rufus… oh no!" Riku looked up, and saw a redhead and a blond had entered the store. Sora whimpered and Riku smoothly ducked under the table as they spotted him.
"Sora! Come here and take your punishment like a man." Axel said firmly, and Sora made a break for the door, just managing to get past Roxas. They immediately went after him, and Riku stayed put, shaking her head.
She'd do a lot of things for Sora, but not defend him from the two guys he'd accidentally given a tube of glue to. There were limits to friendship and even unrequited love. He deserved a spanking.
Riku stepped into the smoky tavern and coughed. She'd been in places like this before, of course… but not since she had been part of the darkness with DiZ. She glanced around, and quickly picked out Axel and Roxas. That red hair was as good as a stop sign. But Sora wasn't with them, and she sighed as she headed over.
"Hey there. I'm Riku." She offered, deciding not to mention that she was the one who had beaned Axel earlier. He hadn't really caught a glimpse of her so he probably didn't know. "I was with Sora earlier and he mentioned a safari I might be interested in?" Axel and Roxas exchanged a glance, and Axel shrugged.
"Why not? The more the merrier. You have a keyblade?" Riku nodded and called it up. Axel blinked, then eyed it, interested. "Nice. Have a seat." Riku vanished the keyblade and pulled up a chair.
"Where's Sora?" Although she had a very good idea. Axel confirmed it with an evil grin.
"The infirmary. He'll be fine by tomorrow." Riku decided not to ask. Whatever his punishment had been, she was sure it had been appropriate. "We're going to be heading out at the end of the week, did Sora mention that?"
"Yeah, he did." Riku looked at the sad, lonely bottle of wine on the table. It was almost empty. "Let me go get us something. Do you like Winkles Old and Very Peculiar?" That was a beer that Riku had gotten quite fond of. She wasn't sure what was in it and had decided not to ask. Axel shrugged and Roxas looked interested.
"I'll drink anything if it's free. Thanks." Axel replied, and Riku smiled, going to the bar. Soon she came back with three mugs. Roxas tried his and choked.
"Ewww?!? This is chunky!" Riku shrugged and took a deep drink, pausing to chew a few times.
"That's the part I like. Kind of salty. Like bar snacks and drink in one." Axel looked intrigued and gave his a try.
"Not bad. But what goes into it?" He asked, and Riku shrugged.
"That's the kind of question I try not to ask." She turned and frowned as a passing undine threatened to collapse on her. The water elemental managed to hold itself together long enough to make it out the door, and she wondered what it had gotten drunk on. The World's End Tavern had something for everyone. "So can you give me a rundown on this safari thing? I didn't get much of a chance to ask Sora questions." Axel and Roxas both filled her in, and Riku listened carefully, intrigued. This Dark Land sounded fascinating. It also sounded deadly, but it wasn't like she had a whole lot to live for. "Sounds good. D'you think the Doctor will want me?" That was the other question.
"If we put in a good word for you, he'll take you." Roxas said confidently. "And if Sora likes you that's good enough for us." Sora tended to be a pretty good judge of character, even if he was a complete idiot sometimes. Riku smiled faintly.
"Then I'm down." It might kill her, but that would be the breaks. And if she came back alive, it would be a good start to building a career as mercenary.
For now, that was all she wanted.