Chapter 49

"Come on you," said Ariana as she picked up Poppy's lead. They were off for a walk. It was mid day of a mid week afternoon. She had a lot on her mind and she had to get out. Besides she knew her way about Hogsmeade perfectly well by herself now. She could go alone.

Poppy jumped up, excited and barked. The two walked down the stairs into the bar, Ariana wrapped in a big jumper to keep out the cold.

"See you soon darling," said Aberforth as he watched her exit. She had been acting weird lately. Even more so than normal. She would come to him when she was ready and not before though.

"Yup." She said with a smile.

She walked out of the village and straight out to the fields. It was a place she had become rather familiar with since she had Poppy. They often walked out this way together. The excited puppy pulled on her lead by Ari didn't go any faster. She wanted the time to think over well everything.

Everything was so different to how it was.

She tried to think back to how things had been when she was ill. But she couldn't. There were only sketches of time. Images of a nightmare.

On each side of that there were moments of happiness from a happy childhood and her time at Hogwarts. In between there was very little. And she wished there was. She felt as if she had been denied the childhood she would have loved to have enjoyed. And to have been a child... had she ever been a child? Yes she knew she had always been childlike, she had needed the same things as other children but she wasn't sure she had ever been a child in the truest sense of the word. And now here she was.

About to make the most adult choice of her life so far.

When she looked back on her time with Harry she knew she had no regrets. They hadn't wasted a moment. And the times when they had been together and they had not been touching were because they had needed to get to know each other, or they knew the other one needed time out.

She thought back to the day when she had told him that she was going to be starting school and that she had been scared because she had not had her mother there to help her make the choice. She missed her still and always was going too. But she didn't need her there to tell her what to do anymore. She had her own life. And she used her own mind. And things were never going to be as they were.

But was that so bad?

She sometimes spent so much time thinking on the past, she mused, that she might forget to live. Didn't every ones lives change?

Ages. The years that go past. The people we love, those we hate. Didn't they all change? Who we knew.

Who we lose.

Why were the changes in her life so special? What made her pain any different?

Her thoughts turned back to Harry. Sex. She wanted him in new ways she now knew. Things were different.

She was different. She wasn't scared. She was thrilled at the idea of them being so intimate with one another. It was going to bring them together in ways she didn't know before.

She was sure of it.

But she wanted it to be special. And it certainly wasn't going to be that evening. But soon... soon she planned to surrender herself to him entirely.

It was then that her deep contemplation was interrupted by a park. Only it was not Poppy. It was another dog. She knew it though.

But he wasn't there.... he wasn't at Hogwarts ... unless...

The dogs master came up behind him and a huge smile spread across Ariana's face and relief swept her heart. There was a certain kind of warmth that only a familiar face of an old friend could bring to her.

"Hagrid..." she whispered in a tone of joyous unbelief. The size of the man who was moving towards her made it impossible for it to be any one else so close to Hogwarts. It could only be him. He had Fang with him. But when she saw his face clearly her heart lurched. He was battered and bruised. He had been hurt. "Hagrid!" she cried this time louder.

"Well if it isn't 'ur Miss Ariana." He beamed. It was so good to see her. He had been told by Hermione, Ron and Harry when he had seen them that morning that Ariana had left the school. She seemed pretty well on first glance he thought to himself.

Running into his arms she was sure to keep hold of Poppy's lead but threw herself into the giants embrace which were wide open and very willing to receive his young friend who he had missed so much in the time that he had been away. He had not forgotten those who had been waiting for him to return, and his young friends certainly had been.

When she drew back he noticed there was something different about her. She was not so young and in subtle ways she had indeed grown since he had been gone, yet her eyes told him she was still the Ari who he had so loved teaching. She had matured somehow.

"I missed you so much and am so glad your back, Hagrid but....your hurt." She said as her eyes traced the bruises which smothered what must have been his aching face. "Are you ok?"

He nodded. He didn't want her to make a fuss over him. The bruises were necessary if he was going to keep his brother safe. Aberforth would understand he thought to himself. He would do anything for his little sibling as well. But Ariana... would she understand? Was it safe for her to know?

"Don't worry; really, I'm fine," he insisted but he knew she was not convinced. She was wearing the same looked Hermione had had on her face when he had told her he was fine.

"How can you be?" she asked. The thought of anyone hurting someone she loved hurt her.

"Please Ariana, really," he insisted once more. She didn't know what she might be able to argue to make him tell the truth. Her eyes seemed particularly expressive that day and they bore into him as they asked the question that was itching to get on to her toughed and out of her lips – who has done this to you?

She did not response.

"Come back to the pub," she urged him. "Aberforth would love to see you I know he would," she said to him. And he was far more likely to get the truth out of him than she was.

"Ok," he said. He knew she was only worrying because she cared.

The walk back to the Hogshead after their warm reunion was rather stiff, which was not like them she thought to herself. They had never had an awkward silence between to contend with before but she didn't know how to break it.

Aberforth when he saw his friend was also duly concerned about him.

"Ari love why don't you go on upstairs?" he quickly made the suggestion.

She hated to be treated like a child but she knew Hagrid was never going to say anything with her there and so offering a shy smile she did as she was told and climbed the stairs.

Letting Poppy off her lease when they were back in the flat she sat down on the sofa and worried. She knew Hagrid had been out of the country on an order mission. So what on that mission had hurt him so badly?

Downstairs meanwhile Hagrid recounted to Aberforth what he had been through over the past six months as he had tried to get Grawp back to the castle and into the forest.

"I couldn't just leave him there."

"Of course you couldn't, he had to be brought back so you could take care of him."

If anyone could understand the love an elder sibling had for the younger, it was him.

-

"Is he ok?" said Ariana quickly as Aberforth came up. It was nine o'clock and he had got into the habit of coming up about this time to check on her. In fact he normally checked in on her more than one time in a night but he had got so engrossed in his conversation with Hagrid he could not leave.

"Yes my dear, he's fine. It is nothing for you to worry about." He knew she was going to be left quite unsatisfied by that answer but he could not help that. He had said to his friend he was not going to tell and so he wasn't. "I am sorry I left you for so long today up here, but we got talking. Did you get yourself some dinner?" he asked.

She shook her head. She had been busying thinking about what they were talking about that dinner had gone quiet out of her head.

"Oh Ariana, what am I ever going to do with you girl? If your head wasn't screw on I am sure that you would lose it." He said to her and she shrugged as a way of giving an apology.

"Tea and toast do you for tonight. I fancy it has got so late that you don't really want anything do you?"

"Not particularly." She shrugged. She'd rather go to bed and wait for Harry.

"Well you have to have something." He said to her. It was more out of habit than anything else he made her eat now she thought to herself.

"Some of your big brothers special tea and toast then?" he said and she nodded. Brushing his lips across her forehead, he smiled. He liked to feel needed.

"I am going to go and get my pyjamas on." She said as she turned to the hall way that lead to her room. She considered trying once more to get whatever Hagrid had said to him out of him. But she knew what Aberforth was like. Loyal to the last. And if he had said he was not going to tell her then he was not going to tell her.

"Go on then my lass, it is going to be ready in a moment."

-

Harry awoke with a start. He knew it was not morning yet, how could it be. But he was wide awake. He wasn't the only one. "Did I keep you awake?" he asked.

"No."

"Liar."

She gave a soft chuckle but in truth she was concerned for him. He had not stopped tossing and turning ever since her had got in that night. Even if she had wanted to sleep his constant fidgeting would have prevented her. But she had stayed up running her fingers through his hair trying to soothe him. To no avail. She had been rather worried that if he had been any louder that he was going to wake Aberforth. They had been lucky so far that he had not caught them.

"What were you dreaming about? Was it the corridors again?"

"Of course it was."

Taking her hand he kissed it tenderly. She was so good to him, staying awake with worry like this. His eyes traced her face.

"I don't have to come if you don't want me too – if I am keeping you up." He offered.

"Don't be stupid. I really wouldn't get any sleep if you were not here with me." She said. She didn't know how she would feel if he were not there. If he was not there to keep her safe and to love her. It was a terrible thought. He watched as her expression of concerned turned to grief and sorrow.

"I didn't mean it love. If you want me here then you know as well as I do that I am always going to be here." He reminded her.

She nodded. There were moments when she had to ask if they were real. "Come here," he said as he took her back into his arms. He wasn't sure if he was going to get back to sleep but he wanted to hold her close if he was not going too. Kissing the top of her head he let his eyes wonder to the window. He thought about nothing in particular but there was a fear in his heart and he found himself quite restless for the rest of the night.

November when it came brought no relief to the couple. Harry was banned from playing Quidditch after he got into an argument with Malfoy. Albus was busier than ever as he tried to keep the Order going and his place at the school. During all this there seemed to be little Ariana could do to help any of the men in her life. All she could do was be there and hope in some way she was helping, whether she knew it or not.

However just because he was stressed, it did not mean that harry became less ardent in his affection. If anything it only served to heighten it. There were moments when they were in bed together when she sensed all he wanted to do was what Hermione had explained to her about – entering her.

There were moments when she almost allowed him but for some reason he never quite did it. He always pulled back.

In truth he felt it was disrespectful in a weird way. The two of them had never been about what was physically between them and now he wanted to do was ...

Ariana had almost a couple of times tried to talk about this with him, if he wanted to do it – but it was obvious he did.

So there was only one thing left to do. Make it obvious to him that she was as desperate for him as he was for her. Make sure he knew that she was no longer as Victorian in her morals as they all thought she was.

It was then that a plot hatched in her mind how to do this.