Chapter Fourteen
Matt became very skilled at changing the subject every time my mind got anywhere close to my subordinates. My thoughts and emotions apparently relay directly to my face, so I'm not very good at hiding what I'm thinking or feeling. Every time Matt saw my face become clouded over with something other than happiness, interest, or boredom, he'd immediately change the subject of what we were talking about, or what we were doing.
Most of the time he'd just start kissing me, which shut me up and stopped my thinking processes with the fastest results. Kissing would lead to touching, touching would lead to the removal of clothes, and the removal of clothes would lead to sex. Always. That's just how it worked for us. There was no stopping us once we got started. Sex with Matt was amazing. Beyond amazing. It was euphoric. It made me feel like a god, and only made me want to touch him more.
It had been another week since I found out about Jay's death, and Matt was at work doing whatever the hell he did. I still wasn't allowed out unless I was with him, but I was becoming accustomed to living in his apartment, being alone for a few hours every other day. It wasn't as bad as I originally thought it was. Because I knew Matt would be back.
As it was, I was sitting on the couch, not wanting to work on the Kira case at the moment. I could have cared less. My mind had been on Jay for the last hour, which I knew was a bad place for it to be. But with my mind on Jay, it slowly moved over to Matt, and how he'd been distracting me for the last week. He distracted me quite often. I could swear there were some times when he distracted me, and I hadn't been thinking about Jay, the bomb, or anything of the sort, but maybe that was a figment of my imagination. Either way, I got to thinking about Matt. I knew and accepted that I was bisexual the moment I realized that I wanted to jump my gaming best friend.
That wasn't the hard part. The hard part was realizing that I loved Matt, more than a best friend. It was then, that I was sitting on the couch, that I accepted the fact that I loved my best friend. I loved my Matt.
It was an odd sensation. Part joy, part euphoria, part nervousness, and part pain. The joy and euphoria are easy enough to explain in that I was happy that not only had I realized that I was in love, but that it was none other than my best friend. Who better to fall in love with? The nervousness, well, that's also pretty easy. I had never been in love. Was this the real thing? Did Matt love me back? That I couldn't answer, and I decided not to ask Matt. What if he said no? What if he said I was just a fling?
The pain is a little harder to describe, let alone understand. I think it was because of the nervousness, and not knowing how Matt felt. Not knowing brought me to the worst assumptions, letting me think that he would only see us being together as a fling. As something to pass the time for him.
But at this point, I didn't care. I loved him, and that was enough for me right then. When I glanced at the clock, I realized that I had been sitting on the couch, thinking about Matt, for a little over two hours. I didn't care about that either.
I smiled to myself, thinking more in depth about my love for Matt. I thought back to before I left Wammy's for America. How Matt and I were always together. We studied together, we played pranks on others together. I thought back farther, to when we were little. We played together, we teased other kids together. For as far as I could think back, we were never apart. We did everything together, and were always close to each other.
I sat on the couch, shell shocked. I couldn't believe I never noticed it before. I didn't just love Matt now, I'd loved him the whole time. I'd been in love with Matt for years. This new revelation had me floored. Or should I say couched? Either way, I was stuck in shock until I heard the lock click and Matt's voice.
"Hey Mels, I'm back!" I nearly jumped to the ceiling, but forced myself to turn around calmly, plastering a smile over my face.
"How was work," I asked, trying my best to sound at least slightly interested.
"It was the same as usual. Paperwork on top of paperwork, phone calls, and bitchy suppliers." He looked at me weird, and I couldn't figure out for the life of me why.
"What? Is there something on my face?" I started wiping at my face, thinking I maybe had a smear of chocolate or something.
"Nothing but a giant, cheshire smile. Why are you smiling like that?" Shit. I hadn't realized I was this bad at acting, that I'd have to change my expression. Well, here goes for my improvisation.
"You're hot. I've been thinking. And basically, I want to screw you." Good enough?
"You're a liar, but I'll let it go." Dammit. He can see right through me. Every fucking time. I thought I was the smarter one? Oh well. I am, or so I keep telling myself. As does he. Back on subject, he smiled at me, a little devilishly, laughing at my statement. "Seeing as I like your cover up."
Score! I wonder how many times we've had sex in the last week.. I can't even remember, it's been so often. He even called in sick from work one day. We've been like fucking rabbits. Literally. Fucking. Rabbits.
Matt walked over to me, removing his suede vest before he got to the couch, throwing it in an aimless direction, not caring where it landed. He removed his gloves next, throwing them in the same direction as his vest, then sat down next to me on the couch. He looked at me, smiling. He opened his mouth like he was going to say something, but closed it before a breath of noise came out. I wanted to ask him what he was going to say, but I was scared of the answer, so I left it alone. Instead, I just leaned in and kissed him, lightly spreading my lips across his. I breathed against his lips, licking lightly along the lower one.
He complied immediately, parting his to allow me entrance. Our arms still lay at our sides, the only body parts touching, our mouths. It was a little awkward, but so sweet, in an innocent sense, that I didn't want to move. I just wanted to keep kissing him like this. If it weren't for the fact that my hands were just itching to feel Matt's skin under my own, I would have been able to just kiss him like that for the rest of my life. For eternity.
As it was, my hands did itch to touch him, and his itched for me. He wrapped his arms around my neck as I slowly pulled his hips on top of mine, making him straddle me. Never once did we break the kiss in this process. It was too sweet, too intoxicating to break. Neither of us wanted to lose it. Unfortunately, the need for air came all too soon, and we had to force our mouths apart. I opened my eyes and looked up to see Matt's green orbs staring down at me, lust, submissiveness, and something else I couldn't fathom, shining in his eyes.
