Hey everyone ;)

The new chapter is here! I had a LOT of trouble with writing this one, rewriting the whole thing two times at least because I wasn't happy with it, so I can only hope you will find it okay now.

I love you guys, this one is for you,

AGirlThatDaresToDream


Chapter 23

It seemed like the world stopped for a moment, that the seconds Damon's mind usually took to comprehend someone's words turned to hours and his eyes were slow in finding hers. His body was frozen in time, its control taken from his rational mind and left for his emotions to play with. He was shaking, stuttering, sweating like a fire has just been lit inside of him and its flames were now licking his veins, warming his blood to the point of his cheeks burning, which hasn't happened in decades. His heart was hurting, his eyes watering, it hurt him to think. The fire was spreading, its sparks dancing, jumping, its smoke smothering the things he himself was never able to. Darkness, anger, loss disappearing quicker than he was able to close his eyes. Joy destroyed them, ate them, straightened them with the ground, now urging him, encouraging him to move, telling him that he was strong, that the shock was helpless now, helpless against the fire that took over his heart and dictated its rhythm.

In two steps he was next to her, and when his hands found her waist he could have sworn she wasn't the only one flying.

….

Alaric's eyes turned from the scene which was happening in front of him quickly, the teacher convincing himself that he was doing this in a rush to see the other's reactions and not to be able to get rid of the horrible taste that suddenly started to acerb his mouth. This was him, the vampire was him a decade ago, there was no other way to put it. He had just gotten everything he has been hoping for, he has gotten her and although the caution that settled in his heart the moment he has seen Elena and Damon together for the first time hasn't left him yet, he would be lying if he said that it hasn't decreased. How could it not, when he has seen the expressions that were now lingering on their faces? When his eyes had once been just as full of joy as the vampire's were in this moment? There was no way he was using her, no way that what they were all seeing now wasn't real. He loves her, the creature for which they weren't even sure can feel loves her… And they have been wrong.

The teacher's eyes met Ethan's first, the lack of shock in them surprising to Alaric until he was able to see the deep ocean of pain and longing that overflowed them, blurring his friend's vision. He was staring at the smiling couple dreamily like he wasn't even be able to see what was happening in front of him, and Alaric knew that his most sacred memories or the most beautiful scenarios he could imagine must be playing in his mind. His hart clenched at the sight of the love-struck expression on Ethan's face. He knew it was stupid and wrong, since nor himself nor his friend had any power over the things that happened in the past, his conscience gnawing at him in the moments that it happened, yet he couldn't seem to be able to stop it. The feeling appeared every time Ethan returned from one of his visits. He has been too selfless to let himself drag her into danger and get everything he has ever wanted, saying that she didn't deserve to live like this, that she shouldn't have to be scared for her life on daily basis, that it would be too risky and that he would never be able to forgive himself if something happened to her. Years have passed since he tried to stop all contact, but failed miserably. She meant the word to him, despite never being his, sleeping in the arms of another and carrying children he wasn't a father to. He loved her too much to let the pain stop him from visiting her every other Wednesday, thought, never refusing to drink beer with her husband or babysit their kids, playing with them and loving them like they were his own. He never had her, but at least she was there. She was loved and happy and by any means not sleeping in the coffin at the Mystic fall's cemetery like Alaric's wife was. And he envied him, he envied him even if only for being able to look at her. He envied him so much in these moments, hated that he wasn't strong enough to stop the sickness in his stomach as he realised what he just thought of. They were only moments, yet guilt never failed to hit him a second after he managed to remind himself how much his friend meant to him. It pressed heavily on his chest, accusing him, punishing him and never truly left.

Kylan's face was full of uncertainty, his eyes darting across the room like he was looking for a life saver, while Lynn's loving ones drew lines connecting them to the vampire and the girl who was held in his arms, the amount of awe mixed into her features most definitely worth worrying about. And Jonas, who was standing next to the pair looked completely undisturbed, his expression as blank as a brick wall, like the scene was completely boring or like he somehow managed to figure out what to expect before it actually happened; only moving his hand to stop the outraged Bill who was shooting daggers not just towards the vampire but towards most of them as well, his expression reminding the teacher of just how rough and desperate his voice has sounded the evening before.

"You can't seriously be considering this, right? Tell me you aren't considering this!" Bills voice echoed through Ethan's weekend house's dark front yard, illuminated by the moonlight as the trio made their was closer to the front door, the lights inside inviting, the shadows that they saw moving across the closed curtains giving Alaric a feeling of coming home.

"Does it matter?" Ethan's voice sounded tired. "It's out of our hands anyway, my voice is no stronger than yours or theirs are."

"Then don't tell them! Do they really need yet another thing on their shoulders, yet another conflict? We can deal with this alone."

"Maybe." The old man nodded to the teacher who has already started to search for the keys in his jeans pockets. "But these are not the rules. And we need to learn. We all need to learn how to stay united even when we disagree with things."

Their friend's response was cut by the click of the lock, and a second later they were greeted by a predicted, almost frantic dog yelps and the sound of Kylan's voice, laced with worry.

"We got your message. Is everything Ok? I thought you said you were going to spend the night there."

"There have been certain…complications. Is Lynns here with you? And Jonas? "

The curls on Ky's head shook when he nodded. "Exchanging stories in the living room."

"Great," his mentor gently tapped him on the back before leading the way. "We need to talk."

"So what? She asked you to acknowledge her rules. Can't we just agree to the rest and let this one slide? The protection of her and her family, letting her have a veto on the things regarding her… I think we can all agree that her wanting to have a reassurance like this would be in place. It doesn't mean we have to let her get all of the points, right?" Luka's voice sounded higher through the speaker of his father's mobile.

"It's not that easy," Alaric broke the silence for the first time since they sat in the car. "She basically has us against the wall. She said that if we don't meet all of her demands she is not coming."

"Oh, come on guys, she is just testing us. What other choice does she have? It's not like she can just stay hiding forever. And the vampire can't help her if he wanted. There are freaking millions offered as a reward for his head!", Kylan ended his thoughts with raised voice.

"You told her what we need her for, right?" Jonas jumped in mid conversation and turned his attention to Ethan. "What did she say?"

"Basically? That we have the same goal, but she would be more than able to reach it herself, or at least flee to Europe if we don't let the vampire come with her."

"Well, she is bluffing. There is no way they have a plan reliable enough," Luka continued from where they left off.

"She is not bluffing. She is ether brainwashed or compelled." Bill sounded like he wouldn't care less in the world, but Alaric who was standing beside him was even without trying able to notice how much his hands were shaking. "The only thing we should be discussing right now is how to get her out of there as safely and as quickly as possible."

"And what if she is not?" Lynn challenged him fearlessly. "What is she just wants him with her because he helped her? Because he makes her feel safe?"

"He is a monster, not an effing puppy! He did this to her, everything that has happened he did to her and now you are telling me she would be able to just forget that without him compelling her or threatening her? He is using her! The only reason why he forced her to include this was to spy on us, find out what our plan is and then stab us in the back!"

"Yeah? And how do you know that?"

"You… You haven't seen her. You weren't there to see how scared she looked." Bills voice broke a little. "We have to get her out of there."

"What we have to do," Ethan interrupted, saving his friend before Lynn could find another argument, "is vote. In the morning, though. She expects the answer by ten and I think we all need some thinking to do until then. We need her. You know we do. For everything we have ever wanted. For everything any person has ever wanted, she is the key. Let's not forget that." He rose from the couch he was sitting on. "I will see you all here again at eight, tomorrow morning. And I know that this is a tough decision, but I expect you to have your answers ready. Whatever the majority decides will prevail." He looked between Lynn and Bill almost strictly. "There will be no arguments. If we want to succeed, we need to stay connected, whatever happens."

The sound of the door slamming shut was what brought Alaric back from his thoughts, making him realise that Bill was now nowhere to be seen and that a tense silence has fallen over the room. Everyone was half-trapped in their minds by the never ending replay of what they have just seen happen between the vampire and the girl, while others stared blankly into the door or even carefully observed Ethan to see what his non-existing reaction would be. At last, Jeremy cleared his throat with a line that made Alaric almost want to kiss the ground in front of the kid's shoes. "Hm… Would anyone here want something to drink?"

….

A loud bang was what denounced that the door really did slam shut like Damon intended them to do when he kicked them without bothering to look over his shoulder, his back still sore from forcing them to open by bumping into them, but the pain he felt was distant, like an echo of a long lost memory as his hands rested on the waist of an angel. She was giggling as he twirled her around, her hands locked securely around his neck, her wings flapping gracefully, victoriously until he only supported the shadow of her actual weight. Did she even know how much she meant to him in that moment, with her silky loose hair, her rosy cheeks; marked by the extreme happiness she was feeling and her smile as bright as the sun? She was his joy, his pride, his strength. He had been swayed by her long ago, he knew, but this was different. The fine line he has been balancing on with her was gone now. His heart was ready for her, his soul open. She was everything to him right now, from this moment now on, till always.

And every single glance, every single though that concerned her was suddenly different. She was far from the broken girl he once saw hidden behind the walls she put up in the centre. She was her true self now, free, kind, stubborn, in control. She was magnificent and divine, and all he wanted to do was tell her. Tell her how proud he was, how happy he was, how happy she had made him, how she will never have to be alone again, feel alone again, be sad, hurt, scarred. That he will be right there with her to take it all away, no matter where they were or what was going on, but he knew it wasn't the time yet. That the words themselves would let him down. That what he was feeling was too strong, the emotions running through him too fast, too undefinable to be able express them with the intensity they deserved. And so, all he could do was look into the depths of those gorgeous pools of brown that mirrored her soul for everyone to see, and hope that she was able to feel them too, watching in awe as she landed slowly, never breaking his gaze. Her scent was welcoming, tempting as she buried her head into his shirt, with her neck too close to his lips for his liking, and yet the urge he expected to fight never came. Her hand was in his hair, her soft breaths warming his chest... And it felt right.

Playful growling was all he heard, his arms hurting from the force the dog was trying to pull the rope-like toy out of them, its claws drawing lines onto the cold, expensive looking floor he was sitting on. He didn't care, though not when he was, after what felt like a lifetime, finally doing something just to remember how his face felt when he smiled. He had always wanted a dog. Ever since he was a little kid this was what he wished for every birthday, until he was old enough to learn what having a pet really meant. Responsibility. One that he at twelve wasn't sure he could handle, so he and his parents made a deal. If he, after growing up a little, learning about how much time and dedication a dog really needs, figuring out what the best way to train one was and where it would have to sleep still wanted a dog, he would get one at fifteen. Something that would never happen now. It was all gone.

The sound of the toy dropping to the ground was what brought him from his thoughts and his smile widened at the small victory, before realising that the dog hasn't stop growling. Its fur was bristled, its mouth lifted in threat, showing off its extremely sharp and dangerous looking white teeth while foam was forming on its tongue and dripping to the ground. Its eyes were darting around without a pause, filling the boy with fear, panic, even though Max wasn't coming towards him but backing away from him slowly. Carefully, the boy stretched his arm towards the animal to protect himself from the sharp teeth that could come snapping towards his face at any moment, or to calm the animal down, he didn't know; his eyes wide with fascination towards how his body was reacting, flickering to his shaking hand as he wandered just how he would be able to stop the trembles. He quickly realised that he will never find out how to escape the situation this way, his breath stopping in his throat as he became aware just how close the wet black snout has come in these few moments, its owner arching his back to make himself look even bigger, more deadly, more frightening, waiting for the right opportunity to strike. Time stopped when Jeremy felt the air moving, the dog's high bark hurting his ears, the drops of its saliva hit his palm and its teeth slammed together.

The pain he expected didn't come, thought, the dog turning around and running to another room without eve shooting him another glance. The boy exhaled loudly, leaning against the wall to come back to his senses, running his still shaking hands over his face. He heard stories about dogs who snapped before, the cases of people in the hospitals because of their own best friends, their best friend that never showed any sign of aggression until the incident. Dogs killing other dogs, killing children... That couldn't have happened to Max, right? He went through his moves from earlier in his mind again. There had to be something that would tell him what started this. His tail was nowhere to be seen. He was scared. He was backing away from him. His eyes were darting, lingered when he looked over his shoulder. Jeremy's heart jumped out of his chest as he turned around in fear, his palms squeezed into fists to protect himself, his body tense until he was able to recognize the face of the person who must have been standing behind his back for a while now.

His sister stood on the other side of the hall the dog has run to, probably on her way to greet their guests, her wings slightly bowed and her gaze sad, her voice quiet as she spoke, distant, everything in it screaming shame. "I... I am sorry… I didn't... I didn't mean to scare you."

"It's fine. Don't worry about it." He smiled warmly at her, letting her know they were fine, even if he had no idea what just happened. He hated seeing this look on her, so not resembling the Elena he knew from before. She had so many things to bear on her shoulders now, and though he trusted in the strength she showed him completely, he would have felt a lot better if she would let him bear at least half of them. It was his fault too. He could have gone with their parents that day, maybe see whatever was on the road that caused the car to spin out of control or help to drag everyone out of the drowning vehicle... do something. But he refused to do so then. He remembered how stupid his excuses had been and how awfully ridiculous they sounded now. He was no stranger to guilt.

"Damon said that the animas… That they can sense if... I am sorry... I just … I forgot, I didn't think." She sat down next to him, yet it felt like she was more lost in thoughts that really talking to him, for which Jeremy was extremely grateful as he probably turned three shades paler, his throat closing and his heart suddenly feeling like it had been stabbed. She couldn't have died, did she? She was here, alive, talking to him… There is no way it happened, right? He never really thought about what happened before she was taken into the centre, about what triggered the transformation. It had to be something powerful, he knew. To drown. The verb sickened him, his brain already making up scenes to play in his head of how she must have felt if it happened, full of paralysing fear, panic, darkness and he would do anything, anything to stop it. "Damon, huh?" He sounded breathless, even to his own ears, the words he uttered nothing more than a desperate try of forcing himself to think of something else. "Want to tell me what exactly is going on here?

….

Damon. She could feel herself starting to calm at just a mention of his name, his sweet actions from earlier making her heart swell once more. She never saw him like that before; Joyful, playful, innocent. As he, without a worry in his mind, let all of the shields that were usually surrounding his thoughts crumble, he let her, without even realising it, to witness his essence. To see what he would have been like if he had the most perfect of lives. There would be no guilt inside of him: no pain, no hatred, no uncertainty - only love. He was pure in that moment, hopeful, naïve to the extend where it hurt her. It hurt her that he couldn't feel like that at all times, hurt her to know just how much this life has broken him. But then again: Hasn't this happen to her too? He didn't deserve it. No one did. And yet there wasn't a person in the world who was left unmarked. They were all ruined, at least in some ways.

She got it now as she looked at her brother's face-pale, careful, worried-that what he deserved to hear wasn't the truth. Not all of it. She needed him to be okay with what has happened to her and between her and Damon. It was selfish, she knew, but she couldn't lose one of them for the other. She needed both of them at her side. And she learned a while ago now, that loosing one's perception of you hurt just as much as losing both the person's soul and body.

"He… He was my researcher… at the Centre." She could almost feel Jeremy clinging on every hesitant word she slowly let herself form, only converting it into spoken one after it has been turned in her head for thousands of times. She knew for a while that she will have to explain him everything, and really, the part of the story she was talking about now might turn out to be the easiest of them all. "He was impulsive at first, so eager to know the things that I couldn't tell him, the things that I didn't have a clue about. Yelling a lot, to the point where it scared me since I never knew what to expect... But he calmed down after a few days, talking to me with respect, letting me know about anything that concerned me or my research, calling me by my name, doing all the things I never thought I will be able to experience ever again when I found out where I was. He was nice to me, and he was all I had.

I never really thought much about why he was acting the way he was. It didn't matter, it still doesn't. He helped me. More than once. And then left everything just to bring us closer. He brought me books and helped me write to you, gave up on the research all together and let us just talk. I could discuss anything with him, except for his job and the things I didn't want to talk about, like you and Jenna. And I could see it. I could see something in his eyes that gave me hope that this wasn't just because of his own interests anymore. That maybe it was becoming more and more about me... But then he didn't come one day. They told me he was gone. That he was moved to another division and that was the hardest time for me. They took everything good with them and the whole place was nothing but a prison again until he came for me one night, risking his life for me to be free again... And he lost it, just like he knew he would. He knew he would never be accepted again, he knew that he would have to run. Knew that there was no way he would ever be able to come home again. He knew it all, and did it anyway. When I woke up here I was a mess. The accident, what happened to mom and dad... Everything came after me, and I really thought things would never be the same. They wouldn't be, I think, if it wasn't for Damon.

He was there for me through all of it, no matter what the time was or what it was that bothered me. He was always there, doing all the right things: calming me, talking to me about it, making sure I was sleeping and eating, said that everything was my choice now. That he would help me do whatever I wanted to do next. He helped me locate you and Jenna, never wanting anything in return. He looks after me, Jeremy. He protects me, cares about me, he is my friend. And I… I just couldn't stand the idea of leaving him behind. He is my rock. I need him with me."

….

Jeremy blinked at his sister a few times. Her voice was laced with such hope, her eyes with such amount of passion and trust that it scared him. But then, he asked himself, who was he to question her judgement? She was never really wrong about something like this before, and she told him she trusted the vampire with her life. If she was telling the truth, if she really did need him... Then who would he be if he didn't let her have this?

He narrowed his eyes. "He never hurt you?"

"No." Elena shook her head, although she knew she wasn't exactly telling the truth. He was the one who operated her and she did get hurt in the process, but that was an accident. He didn't wish for what happened. It was never his intention to harm her in any way, and that was what her brother was asking her about.

The boy tilted his head slowly, contemplating his answer before letting the word slip from his tongue.

"Okay."

"Okay?" She sounded confused now.

"Yes. It's fine. I'm fine with it, stop looking so worried." He almost smiled. "I don't know what you were all panicky about, anyway. I mean it, it's not like I could stop you from talking to him if I wanted to. You told me that he respects you and that you trust him that he would never hurt you in any way. You being in danger was all that I worried about, but after what you told me... I am glad you will have him with you. Even if it will take some time for me to show it." He returned the soft squeeze she gave his arm in an unspoken thank you before his face grew serious again. "I want to ask you something, thought, and I want you to know that you don't need to answer my question." He knew he was probably crossing the line asking her this, but he had to know. He needed to know. The uncertainty was killing him. "Are you…" He could hear his voice shaking. "Did you… Did you die?"

This was it. The question she was waiting for. The one that could change everything between them, the one she was afraid to answer, although she knew she had to. She owed him that much. He had every right to know what it was that happened to her and her parents when the car fell from that bridge. He was her brother. He deserved to know and he deserved to be told calmly.

"I don't know for sure, don't remember... The only thing I know is that I couldn't breathe and that they were gone before I was… I… I saw them floating…" She had to stop and gather her thoughts, her palms shaking. "I blacked out and woke up like this at the embankment. Damon said it had to happen, that anything else happening wouldn't be strong enough to trigger the transformation, but I wasn't sure earlier. I thought I would have to feel the pain. I didn't. I don't remember feeling it at least. The dog, thought... It seems like that would explain it best." She stopped for a moment, glancing at him to see what his reaction was, yet his face was blank, the only sign that the theme they were talking about was a little harder for them that coming up with lunch ideas the green-like colour on his cheeks. "At the Centre they ran some tests…" She traced off to see if he wanted her to continue, the fear making her heartbeats echo in her head.

Her brother's mouth opened on que, yet he was still expressionless. "What… What did they find out?" He was so pale that she seriously considered taking their conversation closer to the bathroom.

"I am not aging psychically, but I can get hurt or sick. I need Vervain the same way that vampires need blood…. And given what that guy, Ethan said was the truth, I might be holding a whole bunch of power." She smiled at him, desperate to lighten up the mood. "We still can't be sure about that one, thought."

Jeremy didn't seem to catch her endeavours, his face starting to harden as soon as she mentioned the group's leader, his voice as cold as a stone when he spoke, full of anger, protectiveness. "What else did they tell you?"

"Not much. Just that if one of the old stories is true, we could use this magic to break the bond between the originals and other vampires... Create peace. Why? What's wrong?" He was really scaring her now. She thought he trusted this people.

"There is something you need to know about the group, OK? They are not as nice as they are right now when it comes so business. They will lie to you if that will make the outcome better for them, it happened to me before. They are calculating at all times, even when they are acting like your friends. They might be your alleys, and they certainly believe they are good people. They do follow their rules, and they do keep their promises, but you have to be really careful about how they state them. I have been with them for a while now, and you must listen to me. There is nothing as important as their goal to them. Not your life and not their own. Nothing."

"Maybe. But if you think about it… Aren't our goals the same? Isn't what they want exactly what we have always dreamed of? We finally have a chance to actually change things, Jer! This power, my power could save people."

"If what they told you was the truth. Have you even once thought that they could be lying?"

"Why would they lie? I mean, they are risking their lives being here. I will work with them, even if there is nothing more but hope that drives me. If there is even the tiniest bit of possibility that I could change something, I will help them. How could I not? Even if you never gave your blood for them before, you know just as well as I do how it feels to be treated like food. And besides, it's not like we have a real alternative. They have connections, they know the right people and they are our best chance not to be killed as soon as we step out of the protection spell's boundaries."

"I know that!" Jeremy raised his voice before shooting her an apologetic look as he saw her tense and lowering it again. "That doesn't mean I like it thought."

"We will be fine." She smiled at him while stroking his arm to calm him. "We have each other now… Right?"

….

The fear was perceptible in her voice, still reminding him that she will need time to adjust to how the thing were now. That he was there and that he didn't care if she had wings or not. He loved her, and so the words were laid on his tongue.

"That, we do."


Dear gaudeamusigitur:

Thank you for the compliments, you are so sweet! I hope you liked the chapter,

Much love,

AGirlThatDaresToDream

Hey, vladelena

I can't say much about the group or Damon without giving anything away, but I must say that I love writing from various pov's, so that you can see the different theories, fears, hopes and views on the whole situation from both sides. Especially the ones we saw trough Alaric when he remembered the meeting with the group about what Elena said to them. I guess we will see how the whole thing will evolve as well as learn more about their plan in the future… And god I love writing about Ethan, Nate, Max, Kylan and Lynn… they are my babies after all. :)

I literally had a mini freak out when I wrote the delena parts of this chapter so I hope they at least put a smile on your face, XD

Love,

AGirlThatDaresToDream

Hi delenalu

I believe I already replied to your last review in the pm once and I am so excited to hear what you will think of this chapter, so write to me soon OK?

I love you, my friend,

AGirlThatDaresToDream :*

Hello Sorrybout'ya!

I hope you enjoyed the chapter! I know it has been a long time coming. Have an amazing week!

Much love,

AGirlThatDarestoDream

Hey jairem

Regarding what you said in your last review I think this chapter is going to be one of your favourites. I can't wait to hear what you thought of it!

Love you,

AGirlThatDaresToDream

My thanks also go to both guest reviewers, you guys rock! ;)


My tumblr where I let you know how I am doing with the next chapter is agirlthatdarestodream, and the review button for you to let me know what you thought is right under this sentence. ;)