Chapter 26 -"Take Me on The Floor" The Veronicas
"Fuck Davies you are one hot piece of ass…" Ashley was standing in front of the bathroom mirror at the Abbey admiring how the tight black dress she was wearing made her buttocks look impossibly perfect. She was hot, she was Ashley; she couldn't help it. She was on top of the world; she had gotten the girl, she had gotten the record deal and she even got to keep her fabulous body. The world was her finger-licking delicious tray of oysters. (Like the ones you get during spring break in Mexico with a bucket of coronas on the side. Fun oysters, with a little bit of mercury to get your blood pumping and your hangover cured.)
Her self-admiration was interrupted abruptly when she heard the door to the semi private bathroom close. She turned her head only to see an equally hot Spencer leaning against the door, locking it behind her. "Hi Pretty…." She gushed as soon as she saw the blonde. Spencer was undoubtedly the most beautiful girl ever in Ashley's book. No wonder there was a website; they were the most attractive duo since Brad and Angie. (True story, she read it on the Spashley newsletter.) Plus Spencer was really embracing the rock star girlfriend look; wearing a leather mini and a white top, she was the epitome of hot girlfriend status. "You look really hot tonight... Extra slutty, just the way I like it." Ashley grinned but Spencer just stared at her intently. She made the over confident brunette suddenly feel awkward. "Yup…" Ashley was nervous now. Damn that stupid moody bathroom, the lighting was dim and she couldn't really read the blonde's expression. She was either really coy or really pissed. She couldn't tell, but she braced herself for the latter. 'Fuck. What did I do now?' Ashley internally interrogated herself. She'd found that she had a knack for pissing off the blonde without even knowing it, but she didn't really mind because their make up sessions were well worth it, especially the ones that started two weeks ago.
What had she done? She noticed Spencer giving her strange looks all night, but she was pretty sure they were the 'I want you now' looks and not the 'you did something wrong and now I'm going to kill you' looks. Unfortunately they were quite similar.
Ashley turned her back to the mirror and leaned against the counter to get a better look at the blonde and possibly to grovel and plead her case. "Ok before you yell at me, can you te-" The brunette's pitiful plea was interrupted as the blonde unexpectedly pushed herself intimately against Ashley's curvy body. "Well hello there." She was right; Spencer WAS giving her the 'I want you now' looks and now, Ashley started to believe there was a God. "Oh, Spencer you naughty little genius."
The blonde anxiously smashed her lips against the brunette's. She'd been craving her the moment she saw her wearing that tight backless dress. She would've claimed her right then and there, but what kind of hostesses would've Spencer been if she made the honored guest late to her own party. (Not a very good one obviously.)
The blue-eyed girl wrapped her arms around brunette's small waist as Ashley lost her fingers in blonde locks, pulling her in as close to her as humanly possible. Ravaging her mouth with all the want in her body. Spencer hungrily pulled away and stared devouring Ashley's neck making the brunette instantly hot. She tugged on the rocker's lobe with her teeth and tongue and Ashley was a goner. She'd let that girl get away with murder at this point. The blonde slid her hands down the brunette's back, slipping her fingers underneath the thin dress material. "Spence…" The brunette weakly moaned as the blonde's hands took property on the brunette's highly desirable asset. Ashley wasn't the only one that noticed how flattering that dress was on her.
She was defenseless as Spencer roamed her collarbone with her tongue and her tactful hands traveled up to her chest. "Fuck. " Ashley feebly moaned as Spencer skillfully massaged her breasts. She couldn't believe how turned on she could get. Ashley loved aggressive Spencer; she was so… aggressive.
The blonde's hands wandered all over the brunette's body while her tongue discovered new ways to pleasure her. Her fingers exposed new forms of satisfaction while her teeth nipped at familiar ones. Their bodies danced into each other, until the conquering blonde pressed the brunette up against a wall.
"Ow" Ashley whimpered while her bottom lip was caught between Spencer's teeth.
"What? Are you ok?" The blonde pulled away alarmed.
"Electric hand dryer"
"Oh god I'm so sorry." Aggressive Spencer temporarily disappeared as concerned Spencer started rubbing the brunette's back.
"No shhhsh. Don't stop." Ashley pulled the blonde back into her lips. Beckoning her back with her body. The brunette held on to the blonde's face quickly convincing the naughty genius to come back out and play.
The gorgeous blonde slipped her thigh between the brunette's legs and Ashley moaned a little louder. Spencer draped her hands around Ashley's toned legs and pushed the tight material up, past her immaculate rear and only stopping once it was sitting above her hips. Brushing up againts her tattoo. She effortlessly slipped dress straps off the brown-eyed girl's shoulders, bearing her chest in an instant. Exposing her completely.
Spencer's tongue traveled down from Ashley's neck to her breast, taking her nipple between her teeth while her fingers softly traced a path from her thighs to her wet center.
"Then she put her whole fist in there…" Chelsea animatedly told Kyla, hand gestures and all.
"Oh I think I've seen that one, Jenna Jameson?" Sally interrupted as she walked back from the bar.
"Paula Dean." Kyla was so naïve but Chelsea smirked knowingly.
"Ugh. That's disgusting. If you're going to watch Food Network porn at least go with Bobby Flay or Giada"
"Ugh. I hate Giada…" Chelsea offered"…she seems like such an uptight bitch…"
"I know! Which means she must be a kinky freak in the sack…the crazy uptight ones always are…"
"How did we get from talking about stuffing a turkey to Giada is a kinky freak?" Kyla asked rhetorically. She was aware of Sally's infamous sexual over-activity and wasn't completely surprised at the turn in conversation.
"Hey, one large woman's culinary talent is another man's wet pornographic dream. You know what I mean?"
"What? No." Kyla didn't even know what to do with that. She must've been a lot more reserved than she thought.
"Hey, where's Spashley? We want to say goodnight before we head over to Truck Stop" Lily and Sandy walked up to the table where the girls were sitting, oblivious to the food porn conversation
"Did you just call them Spashley?" Kyla asked Lily incredulously.
"Yeah. It's faster."
"They're having sex in the bathroom" Sally stated matter of fact.
"Who?"
"Spencer and Ashley. I mean 'Spashley'" Sally corrected herself using air quotes.
"Don't be stupid." Kyla shunned although she believed it.
"Yeah. They wouldn't run off in the middle of the party just to… have sex." Chelsea added although she believed it too.
"Are you fucking blind? Did you not see those 'I wan't to fuck you right now' looks Spencer was throwing Ashley from across the room?" Sally informed the girls exuberantly.
"Oh… I thought Spencer was mad at Ashley…" Chelsea questioned, she had seen the looks and obviously misinterpreted them.
"I know. Her sex face and her angry face are almost identical." The roommate offered.
"That's weird…" Chelsea cringed.
"I know, last time I thought she was coming on to me but it turned out she was really pissed because I emailed Patrick a picture of her and Ashley making out on the couch…"
"You're evil…" Chelsea laughed, obviously not committing to the statement.
"Fuck that! I'm doing the lord's work… and so are they… in there" Pointing to the bathroom door behind her where Spencer and Ashley had disappeared.
"God Sally! Is it always about sex with you? Maybe they just wanted to have some alone time and talk..." Kyla didn't really want to have another conversation about her sister's sex life. It seemed like that's all everyone ever wanted to talk about.
"Sure if by 'talk' you mean' fuck like dolphins', then I one hundred percent agree with you..."
"You mean rabbits..." Chelsea corrected.
"No. Everyone knows Dolphins are by far more sexual creatures than rabbits… Plus HELLO Dolphins are gay." Sally was abundant with useless knowledge.
"What are you a fucking animal expert?" Lily contended.
"You mean zoologist?" Sally's smart-ass corrected.
"I mean, shut the fuck up Jack Hannah..." Lily deadpanned. There had always been a friendly rivalry between the two girls. Neither wanted to share credit for bringing Spashley together, even though it really was a collaborative effort. Plus, if anyone could take full credit it was the Universe.
"See it is always about sex with you..." Kyla concluded.
"I fucking wish! I'm nothing compared to the two horn dogs having sex in the bathroom..." Sally defended.
"They're NOT having sex in the bathroom!..." Kyla insisted.
"Please, you think that's the least offensive and or public place they've had sex in? Just this week alone those two have put my entire sex life to shame… which is saying a lot"
"Yeah you're definitely saying A LOT." Kyla rolled her eyes; she wasn't budging on her stance against Spashley sex talk.
"Well I don't know if this counts as offensive and or public, but I'm pretty sure I walked in on them having sex on Monday…" Lily offered.
"Oooh where?" Chelsea was strangely interested.
"On the roof, where Ashley's pool is."
"In the pool?"
"No… on the pool chairs" Lily corrected Chelsea.
"Yeah sorry. The pool chairs Ashley owns do not count as a public venue…" Sally corrected condescendingly. She was trying to trump Lily's earlier comment by being an ass.
"Whatever" Lily shrugged. "They were both in bathing suits practically naked. Spencer was on top of Ashley. At first I just thought they were just wrestling or playing because Spencer was holding Ashley's hands above her head, but then when I saw Spencer's hand disappear between Ashley's legs, I knew it was time for me to go." Lily chuckled.
"You were watching them you fucking perv?" Sally yelped.
"Fuck you…" Lily glared at Sally "Ashley invited me over because she was going to give me her old sound system… I yelled like crazy but they couldn't hear me over her new sound system…"
"I don't know, sounds kind of pervy to me… Plus the pool chairs in her roof? Lame. Pool; maybe, but chairs are lame! My story is way better." Sally boasted.
"Are we seriously still talking about this?" Kyla was annoyed.
"Hell yeah! We're a bunch of straight ass women sitting in the middle of a fucking sausage fest… But these pricks are more interested in other dicks and frankly they are afraid of our vaginas! …Something about teeth and shit… stupid fucking bitch ass Freud... Anyway what else are we supposed to fucking do? The gays already did their 'Single Ladies' routine." Everyone was in awe of how Sally was able to dictate several euphemisms for penis while citing castration anxiety theories and about a dozen curse words. She was special that Sally.
"You're right…" Kyla conceded. "Continue."
"Of course I'm right! I'm a mother fucking P.I.M.P!…" Kyla couldn't help but smile at Sally; she was so peculiar but strangely entertaining.
"Relax whitey… Now let's see you try and beat my story…" Lily on the other hand didn't think Sally was amusing at all.
"So anyway on Tuesday they totally had sex… on Spencer's Vespa®!!!" Sally said uber excited.
"That's impossible!... That thing is so small..." Chelsea pointed out logically.
"On it, by it, next to it on top of it... according to Spencer it was all very dirty... when you want it bad enough anywhere is possible... I once had sex on a bike…" Sally admitted.
"Oh my word... A motorcycle?" Lily asked.
"No. A fucking two wheeled man powered banana seat beach cruiser …with a fucking basket…" Sally confessed.
"I don't believe you..." Kyla was apprehensive.
"You think I'd lie about shit like that? I had basket prints on my ass for a week."
"No, not you, Spencer… She's so…" Kyla started.
"Uptight? …" Chelsea finished understanding completely.
"Ok, did we NOT just have a conversation about freaky uptight girls… Plus HELLO, she finally got a taste of the good life, she's addicted… Hey Sandy…"-Sally now turning her attention to the blonde next to Lily- "You had a brief taste. How is Ms. Davies in the sack? Was it the best sex EVER?"
Maybe Sally was being inquisitive or maybe she was just pushing Lily's buttons. No one could ever tell with that cheeky brunette, but it was probably the latter.
"Sally!" Kyla yelped.
"Babe, I beg you to please not answer that..." Lily glowered at Sally.
"Yes, Please. I don't need to hear anymore details about my sisters sex life..." Kyla begged.
"Plus you might get punched." Chelsea pointed out, acknowledging her long time friend's recent uncharacteristic violent streak. She was kind of impressed by this new Spencer. Everyone was.
"Boo! You guys suck." Sally pouted. "Anyway I guess I win…"
"Yeah, NO. Because if anyone has the best 'Spashley' sex story it's me…" Kyla rolled her eyes and shook her head. She couldn't believe she was actually participating in this idiotic game. But if anyone should win, it should be her. It was her sister after all.
"Better than sex on a Vespa® no way!!" Sally challenged.
"Yeah because I ACTUALLY walked in on them when they were doing it on Ashley's washer and dryer!" Kyla cringed.
"Oh my god! ... Ashley has a washer and dryer?" Chelsea was incredulous at the fact that the brunette actually owned any type of domestic appliances.
"Was it on?" Lily asked. She pondered that idea for future sexual encounters.
"Ewww no!!!" Kyla freaked out.
"Gross. That's your sister man." Sally teased. She was frankly surprised she got the apprehensive brunette to spill her story.
"Hey guys…" Glen and Madison walked up to the table holding several drinks in their hands.
"Ooooh… Glen why don't you share with the girls here what you saw Thursday before your family therapy session…" Chelsea teased, hoping he would share.
"No thanks." Glen scowled at his girlfriend.
"Come on Glen! What did you see?" Sally begged. She knew this had to be juicy the way his face contorted and turned green at the mention of it.
"Nothing." Glen said firmly.
"Let's just say Glen has you all beat. No contest." Chelsea grinned.
"Oooh" Sally's eyes widened with excitement. This REALLY had to be good if Chelsea thought it was better than sex on a Vespa®. She couldn't believe there was anything better than that. "Come on… you can even spare us the rug munching details if you want…" Sally encouraged.
"Ugh! Gross!!" Glen whined.
"What did you fucking see man?" Sally pressed. She was so over the anticipation.
"No please I'm trying to forget...." Glen cringed and Chelsea chuckled. She knew this story would win this asinine game by a landslide.
"Oh my god just tell us where you caught your sister fucking Ashley" Sally insisted.
"No!" Glen was unyielding.
"Come on! Don't be such a puss!" Madison added. She didn't know what the hell was going on but she loved to tease Glen.
"Fuck that." Glen snapped.
"Come on baby just tell them." Chelsea pleaded.
"Chicken!" Lily joked
"Bitch!" Sally added.
"…ON MY PARENT'S BED OK!!!" Glen broke finally.
"Aaaah!" All the girls squealed before high fiving each other. "You win!" They collectively told Glen.
Glen just shook his head at his admission. Punked into sharing his traumatizing story by a bunch of girls. He wondered how long it would be until the image of his sister's head between Ashley's legs would be permanently erased from his memory. He took a large swig of his drink hoping the vodka would help move along the process.
"Ok fine… so they've been having a lot of sex. They're a new couple it's expected, but that doesn't mean they're doing it RIGHT now…" Kyla was really trying to plead her case. Surely her sister had more self-control than that.
"Well what the fuck do you think they are doing in there?… Talking about the fucking whether?" Sally scoffed at the ridiculous notion.
"…So you're saying it's going to be cold?" Ashley was shocked.
"Yeah… very…"
"Crap. Stupid France… What am I going to do? …I don't own any coats…"
"I know. Don't worry I called your assistant Billy, who by the way, did you know she's a girl?
"Yup… The boobs were a dead give away…" Ashley said sarcastically.
"Yeah but her name is Billy." Spencer was ironically being serious.
"Ok Spencerrrrr… You of all people…"
"I wasn't being mean… I was just saying, she's a girl…" The blonde defended.
"Dully noted…"-Ashley smirked, Spencer was so adorable when she was being insecure-"So why'd you call my assistant, who is also a girl, who you should be in no way, shape, or form jealous of, in the first place? " It was true. Spencer was jealous. Billy was going to get to spend six months with her brunette. She couldn't help it; it was her nature. It was a side affect of her overactive imagination. The same imaginative brain that told her it would be fun to do Ashley in the bathroom was also the one that told her there were a lot of germs in there, deterring her from moving forward with her plans of hot dirty sex on the bathroom wall. Plus after they had sex on a Vespa®, they found it was difficult to top it.
"I'm not jealous…" Spencer wasn't fooling anyone.
"I didn't say you were… I was just stating a fact. Putting it out there."
"Anyway"-Spencer rolled her eyes although she appreciated the reassurance-"…I called HER so she could order you a bunch of cute and tasteful jackets…they should be in your apartment when you get to Paris"
"Awww Spence… you're too good to me…"
"I know… but I figured one day I might get you super turned on and fail to complete the task and-"
"Ok first... Don't call sex a task… and second, ONE day? Oh no honey this is strike two for you… You're lucky I love you so damn much otherwise; germy wall or not the TASK would have been completed. Plus that little stunt you pulled on your parent's bed last night has already put you way ahead of the game. Which either concerns me that you have troubling parental issues or that you're a crazy Nympho…"
"What? I like having sex with you… is that a crime?!" Spencer pouted cutely
"I think only that one time on the Ferris wheel…" Ashley smirked.
"Oh" Both girls began to giggle uncontrollably at the reminder of their wild night on the Santa Monica pier.
"It doesn't matter, I'd go to jail for you any day." Ashley said sincerely.
"Awww Ash you're such a romantic."
"Only with you."
