preface: this chapter started out as just an intro to the next chapter, but it ballooned a bit.


Meet Nala

The other lionesses hadn't bothered waking her up. They had assembled for a hunt, taken a headcount, and realized Tuli wasn't with them. No-one knew where she was, either; her and Zira were always off somewhere, sleeping away from the communal den. They could have gone looking around Priderock to try and find her, but most lionesses were pretty eager to get down to the business of hunting. They left without her. By the time Tuli woke up late in the evening, after dark, and went down to the plaza at the base of Priderock, the rest of the pride had already returned from the hunt, and they'd already eaten, too. Most of them still had their muzzles caked in blood.

Upon encountering Tuli, they were quick to offer all kinds of apologies for not inviting her, of varying sincerity. The other lionesses still looked on her as an outsider, seeing as how Zira and her had been allowed into the pride only a little over a year earlier. It didn't help matters that Zira insisted on keeping her distance, ever suspicious and distrustful, dragging Tuli along. Tuli didn't mind. If she had to endure a bit of isolation for Zira's sake, so be it. That's what friends are for. She could handle a lot worse if it came to that. Zira and her would go through hell and back again for one another. They'd already done as much, really.

She wasn't about to blame the other lionesses, either. If Zira and her chose to keep their distance, it wouldn't be fair to expect the others to go out of their way to include them in everything they did. True, when she saw the other lionesses lounging around contentedly with their bellies full of meat, it stung a bit at first - no one likes to be left out. But Tuli simply let the feeling flow over her, took a moment to look at it from the other lionesses' perspective, and then counted her blessing for being part of the pride.

She joined the rest of the lionesses now busy cleaning and grooming themselves, and struck up a conversation with Winda, mother of Chumvi, one of the older cubs. She asked her about the hunt they'd just been through. Turns out it had been an exciting affair: they had set out to hunt zebra, and settled on a large stallion with a crippled foreleg. Hunting a stallion is a bit of a risk, of course, with their strength and temperament, but there's also a lot of meat on them to make it worthwhile. Plus, how hard can it be to bring down a cripple?

Pretty hard, it turned out.

"So there we were, right, our ambush in place, waiting for the others to drive him away from the herd and into our paws. And that part of the plan went off without a hitch. So you've got this big-ass zebra ambling towards us; beautiful, glistening coat, and you can see the bulging muscles working underneath - my mouth waters just thinking about it! So he's coming at us, but he don't know we're there. Then, BAM, we all jump at him, and of course he's in a panic, but he can't go anywhere with that broken leg of his.

"I jump on, and I try to just grab hold anywhere I can, right - we're just trying to bring him down at that point, so it doesn't really matter, just piling on as much weight as possible. Once he's down, someone else can come up and do the killing. I dig my claws in his flank, super juicy, and I'm thinking, I got this, he ain't going anywhere. Might as well have a quick look at how the others are doing. I look to the side, and who do I see but Sarafina, the Leader of the Hunt herself, crouching to jump at the zebra's backside.

"And I'm thinking, damn girl, watch out, don't come at a zebra from behind, you're old enough to know how dangerous that is. Guess what happens not even halfway through my thoughts - she gets a kick right in the face! And if a zebra kicks ya, that's no joke - buggers could probably kick right through a rock wall if they wanted to. Sarafina topples over backwards, drops down, and doesn't move anymore - looked damn near gruesome, I just couldn't stand it, had to look away.

"So, you know, we finish up with that zebra - kicking Sarafina was pretty much the last thing he ever did, 'cause his knees buckled right after, and as soon as he was down Sarabi went and finished him off. When I felt like I could be sure the zebra wasn't getting up again, I got off, and went to check on Sarafina - mind you, there's already like three others standing around her at this point, and everyone has this grave look on their faces. We're all basically thinking, this is it, she's done, ain't no-one getting back up after that kind of kick. And she was looking bad, not moving at all, nasty gash where the hoof had connected...

"Then suddenly, she opens her eyes, and everyone just backs away, shocked. It's like she's come back from the dead, right? She grunts, lifts her head up, and then she asks: "Did we get him?" Can you believe it? Just, did we get him. So I step up, and I don't really know what to say, so I just go, yeah, we got 'im. And Sarafina just nods, gets up, a bit unsteady at first, but she's really totally fine. And she says: "What are you waiting for, then? Let's eat." And she just digs in. Heavens, she almost died! But she just gets up, shakes it off, and moves on to dinner. Pretty crazy, huh?"

A pretty close call, Tuli agreed. It made her a bit worried for Sarafina, though. She took her leave from Winda, and went to have a look at the injured lioness. Turns out she was hardly the first - by then, pretty much the entire pride had asked her if everything was all right, and she was getting pretty sick of their concern. Still, the Leader of the Hunt allowed Tuli to have a good look at her now swollen face - she had missed the live action, after all. And it wasn't like Sarafina could order Tuli to leave her alone - not in theory, anyway.

As far as these things go, the lionesses of a pride are fairly egalitarian among themselves. There's always the lion on top, regardless of whether he calls himself king, but beyond that no-one really gets to pull rank on anyone else. That's not to say that some lionesses aren't more respected than others, or looked up to. One obvious example was Sarabi, the queen - or rather, former queen. When you take something up with a queen, there's always the unspoken fact that she has special access to the king. And in the case of Sarabi, you should also consider that she made every effort to act queenly, so to speak, plainly choosing to say and do things that she considered right and proper, even if it wasn't what she herself wanted to say or do. That doesn't necessarily win many friends, but it does earn you respect; Sarabi could always be relied upon to be above the fray, and be relied on generally.

Sarafina was another special case - she was the Leader of the Hunt. In principle, all that meant is that the other lionesses had decided she would lead the communal hunts. But the mere fact she had been so chosen told you a lot about how the others felt about her. She was from an old Pridelander lineage, a good huntress, a decent enough leader, but most importantly, she got along well with the other lionesses - she had an endearing no-nonsense gruffness about her. So even though Sarafina had no formal authority to order her around, Tuli'd still do well to listen carefully to what the other lioness had to say.

Their talk was pleasant enough, though. Sarafina seemed not much worse for the wear, and she even managed to make light of the whole affair. Most importantly, she didn't have any headaches or dizziness, which indicated she had weathered the blow quite well. If the gash on her face didn't leave too much of a scar, she'd be good as new in days. Once it became clear that she would be fine, Tuli made sure not to keep the other lioness any longer - it didn't take a shaman to figure out that Sarafina wanted nothing more than to be left alone so she could lay down for a long overdue and well deserved after-dinner nap.

Sarafina had already lain down and closed her eyes. Tuli was just about to take her leave, when she noticed the lightly-colored bundle of fur that lay cradled between the other lioness' paws, sobbing quietly. Tuli bent a little closer. The furry bundle stirred, and up perked the head of a young lioness. Her fur was ruffled, and her eyes looked wet from the tears. Tuli knew this cub to have deep, blue eyes, but now they shone silver in the moonlight, looking up at her. It was Nala, Sarafina's only cub. She looked a bit frightened. Of course she did, Tuli thought, the poor girl probably doesn't even know me - it's not like Zira and I get to spend a lot of time minding the cubs when we're keeping aloof of the other lionesses all the time.

"Hello, little one. You're Nala aren't you?"

The cub nodded shyly.

"Nice to meet you, Nala. My name is Tuli. Maybe you don't know me that well - I don't think we've really spoken before..."

"H-hello," Nala managed, sniffing, "Nice to meet you, too..."

Nala had seen this lioness before, but only from a distance.

"I hope you don't mind me asking, but are you all right? I thought I heard you crying just now."

"I-I wasn't crying."

Nala took on a slightly more defiant air, though not wholly convincing. Tuli couldn't help but smile. She'd wanted to act tough, too, when she was that age, figuring that if she didn't act like a little cub, the other lions would stop treating her like one all the time. Of course it never worked, if only because she never could keep up the act for long. Neither would Nala.

"Okay, I believe you," Tuli said, turning her gaze back to Sarabi, now sound asleep, "Don't worry. Your mom will be fine, you know."

Bullseye. Tears started welling up in Nala's eyes again.

"Then why are you here?" she snapped, "If she'll be fine, why did everyone come over here and stare at her? Why did they all look so scared?"

As she tearily barked questions at Tuli, Nala had gotten up and advanced a few paces. The older lioness, by contrast, sat down, forepaws crossed in front of her. Their eyes were now level.

"Do I look scared to you now?"

"No," Nala admitted, "But you did just now, when you talked to mom!"

"I wasn't scared. I was a bit worried at first, though. Did your mom tell you what happened?"

"No... when she came back from the hunt, she just came to find me, and I remember she licked my face, and I could tell she'd hurt herself, but before I could ask what was wrong, the other lionesses started asking all those questions..."

Well..." Tuli frowned, "I can tell you're a smart enough lioness - you've already pieced together what happened, then."

"My mom almost died!"

"She's fine now, though..."

"You don't get it, she could have been killed! That zebra could have killed her and she wouldn't be here anymore! She'd be dead, like king Mufasa, like Simba!"

The last part, Nala almost shouted, now positively angry. Tuli could tell there was more going on there than just Sarafina's accident. Cubs her age shouldn't talk about death, it shouldn't even register as a concept, much less a lived experience. But here Nala was, not even a year old, and she had already had to deal with the death of her friend Simba. What can you say to a cub like that, justifiably angry at the world?

"I do get it. When I was young, I lost almost all of my friends. I wasn't as young as you, though - I suppose that would make it harder still."

That seemed to get Nala's attention. Some of her anger dissipated, turning to regret, and she looked down at her paws.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know that..."

"It's okay, it happened a long time ago, in another pride," Tuli gave Nala a little bump with her nose, to get her to look back up. "You know, we adults don't like to talk to cubs about death - because it's too hard on you, we say to ourselves, and you won't understand..."

This made Nala frown angrily again.

"... but really, we only half-understand it ourselves."

For a little while, neither of them said anything, and Nala alternated between looking pensively at at Tuli, and looking away ruefully. Finally, she spoke again, barely more than a whisper.

"It hurts... For a while it won't, but then I think about Simba again, and I know he isn't here anymore. I can think about him, but I'll never see him again. Knowing that hurts... I-I'll never get to play with him again, never get to joke with him again...

"And then I heard about my mom having an accident, and I thought what it would be like if she wasn't here anymore, how it would feel... If she wouldn't be here for me, if I couldn't cuddle up next to her... Just thinking about it hurt just as bad."

Nala sat down, looking miserably. Now it was Tuli's turn to get up.

"Nala," she said, "Nala, a lot of thing could happen. Most don't. Right now, your mom is still here. She's here with you now, and she's fine. If you want to be with her, that's what you should do. If you want to know what it feels like to cuddle up to her, you can do that, right now. Doesn't that count for something?"

For a second, Nala looked puzzled. Rightly so, Tuli thought, what do I know about these things, anyway? Still, that last part seemed like gook enough advice.

"Go on, don't just sit there," she smiled, and gently shoved the cub in the direction of Sarafina. Nala obliged, and nestled herself in one of her mother's paws. Reflexively, still asleep, Sarafina pulled her daughter closer.