Sleep.

I missed sleep.

That night I got maybe four hours of sleep and the next it may have been almost three. This sucks! Nowaki's words rang loud and clear in my mind that I could focus on nothing else. Even Akihiko called me later like he said but I was too spaced out to hold a proper conversation. He said something about a boyfriend and being happy for me and asked if he was legal. I hung up when I heard that.

He was not my boyfriend. We were nothing like that. If my family found out I was with a man younger than me then it would cause such a ruckus. Not too mention one who is barely getting into college. I already had an idea of what I wanted my life while he was just barely starting. Yes, it was better that nothing developed between us.

Now if only my heart would stop beating.

Why the hell do I want to torture myself?

The coffee that I ordered was getting cold as I continued to look out the window at the flower shop next door, wearing sunglasses like that would make me invisible. Outside the tall teenager was setting new flowers down in a sort of display. I am so pathetic after coming to the conclusion that it was best for the two of us to not see each other again.

He was smiling as usual, no hint that he was rejected a week ago. Either he is good at hiding it or what happened did not affect him as much. That thought pisses me off. I laid my head on the counter as I continued to watch him. What even about me made him like me? My parents and even Akihiko used to joke that the only guy that would stay with me is myself. Sorry for being an independent woman.

Two high school girls approached Nowaki. They seemed too friendly and even Nowaki was smiling a little too big.. I gasped as one of them grabbed his arm. What was worse is he did not push her off. What the hell Nowaki?! You had this whole narration about loving me and now you going to get close to these little girls? Stupid immature kid!

Good boy Nowaki, I thought as he moved aside to help an old woman. You better get away from those girls or I will…

WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING!?

I am acting like such a stalker. There goes my well built strong pride. Not even my feelings for Akihiko could compare to this. I needed to leave.

"Hiroki?" AKIHIKO?!

"What are you doing here?!"

"You are being loud. Perfect timing though, come sit." Not allowing me to protest he sat me down at a couple of couches in the corner. This is bad. I cannot let Nowaki see me. "I was going to contact you to get your opinion on a new story I am starting."

"Sure." It was strange. My heart did not ache as bad as before, more like a numbing pain. I was able to speak and look at him without being reminded of the painful night we shared. Is this you Nowaki? He handed me the manuscript. The more I read, the more flustered I got. "Um, Akihiko, what is this?" It was a sex scene between a guy and girl! I knew he started with BL stuff but this? "And is this character, me?"

He shrugged. "This popped into my head and I figured I would write it and I thought of using you for a starter." What the hell? So is Akihiko going bi or something? Like hell I would let him use me in something like this. "So can I use you in my book?"

"Of course you can?"

"Thank you so much. I will call you later?" My anger bubbled as he had this conversation with himself. "I will autograph the book if it gets published for you and your new boyfriend."

"THE HELL YOU WILL." Ignoring the remark about Nowaki, I reached for the manuscript he took but held it above his head so I could not reach. The whole time he had that stupid nonchalant gaze. "BAKAHIKO GIVE ME THOSE PAPERS." I did not care about making a scene until a mop of black came into view. "Nowaki?"

He stood there in his apron with eyes wide. This was awkward. "Um, hi Nowaki."

"Hiro-san…"

I felt the air move and turned to see Akihiko gone. "Ah, Bakahiko I am not done with you!" And like a coward I raced out.

That night I sat on my floor, exhausted. I did not catch up to Akihiko and I know if I see any new book with my name I will go set his bear collection on fire. And to make it worse Nowaki had to witness that. The timing was horrible.

I thought to go to bed when someone rang my doorbell. If it is Akihiko I will punch him in the face. I opened the door but quickly tried to close it when a hand shot out to stop me. "Hiro-san." Damn this kid is strong. He was able to overpower me and get the door opened.

"What do you want?" I turned to head further into my place. "I told you not to come here."

"You did but I still wanted to see you." How could he say such sappy stuff? "You were at the coffee house across from my job."

I had to remind myself he caught me with Akihiko and he did not know anything about me stalking him for an hour prior. "Yeah so? You saw I was busy."

"With Akihiko-san."

Why do I feel I got caught with my hand in the cookie jar? "He wanted me to see his new manuscript." Like hell I would tell him the details.

"Did you purposely meet him there?"

"NO. He caught me by surprise." Why do I feel the need to explain myself? It got quiet that I had to turn. He was not smiling but there seemed to be some sort of hopeful look in his eyes. "But, you were there much earlier."

He found out!

I made a move to run but he had his hands around me, tightening them so I could not move. "I was so happy that I could not wait for my break to go meet up but then I saw you with Akihiko. I can not explain how jealous I felt then."

"Such a kid." My cheeks heated up against his chest.

"Maybe, but Hiro-san, can I believe you came to watch me?" I wanted to answer but my mouth would not move so instead I nodded, which was hard since he had it pressed against his chest. "I love you Hiro-san."

And there he goes again. I pushed on his chest, thankful that he let me move away, though his arms were still around me. I could not look him in the eye. "You..you are too forward."

"Do you hate that."

No. "It is not that. I am just not used to it." I barely remember my parents telling me that. And definitely never have been with someone long enough to feel that.

"Then get used to it," I felt a hand grab my chin as he lifted my face. His smile was back and he had such a gentle look in his eyes. "I will keep telling you until you only can hear my voice."

"Cocky kid." Nothing more was said as he placed his lips on mine.

That night was much different from the night I shared with Akihiko. Nowaki was only thinking of me, whispering my name over and over again as he held me gently. It was scary but also exciting, just like a storm, just like Nowaki.

"Hiro-san, I love you." He muttered as he drifted off to sleep, trapping me in his arms against his chest. I could feel his chest moving as he breathed softly.

So warm.

Next morning.

I woke up feeling refreshed but also like a huge weight was off my shoulders. Nowaki was not next to me but I could smell food being cooked. "Good morning Hiro-san." He entered my vision, with no shirt and a huge smile on his face. "Breakfast will be ready soon." Stupid morning person.

I mumbled something and snuggled back into the blankets. God this kid is embarrassing. I felt the bed dip and looked up to see him leaning over me with his elbows resting on the edge. "You were amazing last night."

"SHUT UP." I shot out of bed, hitting his face with a pillow and stormed to the bathroom. My whole body was fire as I could hear he has the nerve to laugh outside the door. "Hiro-san, take a quick shower so you can eat the food while it is still hot."

But a kid I love.