I had several requests not to update in small amounts so I've held off updating until this fic was complete. It's almost done I just have the epilog to write. Wanted to thank those that have hung with me hopefully the ending will be worth the wait. I haven't seen the latter half of last season yet so I really need to catch up before the new season starts. Not planning on writing another Chuck fic unless something inspires the muse this one gave me fits though I did enjoy working on it just turned out much longer than I anticipated.

Title: Sacrifice
Author: Cindy Ryan
Pairings: C/S
Category: angst, AU
Timeline: Alternate ending for Chuck vs the best friend
Notes: This hasn't been beta'd but I've done my best to catch any errors

Detective Paul Sheldon stood and stretched. The bullpen of the tenth precinct was nearly deserted. A couple third shift detectives sat across from each other at the far end of the bullpen.
Paul looked down at his empty coffee mug and shook his head. It was time to call it a night, he wasn't making any progress.

As he shrugged into his suit jacket his laptop beeped. Paul leaned down and peered at the screen…..one of the searches he'd set up hours earlier had a hit.

"Now that's interesting."The young man commented as he sat back down and began to scroll through the information on the screen.

********

The day of Chuck's memorial dawned gray and overcast with a strong chance of rain.
To Sarah the weather seemed fitting.
On a day they were saying goodbye to a good man it didn't seem fair that they should see the sun and blue sky.

"Ready?"Sarah asked as Casey opened the door to his apartment.

John nodded grimly as he stepped outside and closed the door behind him. "Yeah. Let's go."

After descending the stairs Sarah paused in the courtyard looking back at the Bartowski's apartment. It was dark Ellie and Devon having left earlier.

Sarah found herself walking over to the fountain trailing her hand lightly along the edge. How many times had she and Chuck sat there?
Talking, laughing….sharing ice cream…..
So many times she'd almost told him how she'd felt….that she'd wanted what they had to be real….so many chances…..

Casey watched his partner for a long moment. As much as he hated to admit it he was missing Bartowski too.
As annoying as he could be at times Chuck had grown on him.
Shown more bravery in situations than Casey had seen in seasoned agents.

"Sarah."Casey called quietly not missing how foreign her first name sounded to him.
How rarely he used it…..it'd always been Chuck….

Startled she turned towards him one hand still on the fountain.

"We're going to be late."John reminded her gently as he took a step forward.

Sarah swiped a hand over her face before nodding. "Let's go."

********

Pain was all that registered to him.

Everything hurt….every limb, every nerve ending.

Even his eyelids felt like they had elephants sitting on them. He wanted to open his eyes.

Wanted to find out why he hurt.

The strength wouldn't come and he drifted back to the comforting oblivion.

**********

Even as Sarah stepped into the small chapel nothing seemed real.
She knew it was but she couldn't shake the surrealness of it.
They shouldn't be here.
It should be a normal day.

Sarah pushed the thoughts away and glanced at the Buy More group seated in the middle row….Lester, Jeff, Anna and Mike.

She looked around and found Morgan up front with Devon and Ellie. Sarah couldn't help but notice that Anna was here alone and that her gaze seemed to linger on Morgan.

Sarah moved farther down the small isle and froze when her gaze landed on the large picture of Chuck positioned off to the side of the podium. He was dressed casually in a dark blue t-shirt and jeans. Appeared to be at a beach somewhere sunlight shone off the waves in the background….he was laughing….his brown eyes sparkling….

Sarah swallowed hard blinking as her vision blurred. Casey placed an arm around her waist guided her to the left and a pew across from Devon and Ellie. Sarah sat down numbly her gaze never leaving the picture.

She knew she missed him….his arms around her….his laughter. But Sarah hadn't realized how much until she saw his image.
Another cold, stark reminder that she'd never see him again.
Another stab in her soul that it was her fault….that she hadn't protected him.

The minister approached the podium after speaking briefly to Ellie.

Sarah felt her hands start to shake and she folded them together. She wanted to say goodbye to Chuck….it was the least she could do….but she hadn't realized how hard this would be….how very hard….

Suddenly Sarah found herself on her feet and stepping around a startled Casey.

He grabbed her arm as she passed.

"Walker…."

Sarah shook free and walked quickly towards the chapel's doors. She could feel everyone's eyes on her but she didn't look back.

*******

Morgan worriedly watched Sarah leave. Making up his mind Morgan stood and quickly followed.
If it was one thing Morgan knew it was that Chuck would want Sarah to be okay.
That was one thing Morgan could do for his friend….look out for the woman he had loved.

When Morgan reached the outside of the chapel there was no sign of Sarah. He squinted against the late morning sunlight that had started to peek through. Morgan looked around the small parking lot, up and down the nearby street….her car was gone.

"Damn."Morgan cursed quietly as he automatically started to pull out his cell phone than thought better of it. He knew she wouldn't answer.

Footsteps drew Morgan's attention and he turned to see Anna standing just outside the doorway.

"Morgan…."Anna began quietly as her ex-boyfriend started to walk past her and back into the chapel.

"What, Richie Rich couldn't be here?"

"We broke up….."

Morgan shook his head. "Don't expect sympathy from me, Anna….especially today."

"That's not…."

Morgan took a step past her wanting nothing more than to draw Anna into his arms….he needed her….

Hesitantly Anna reached out and touched Morgan's right arm. "Morgan….I'm sorry…."

"For what?"Morgan replied unable to keep the bitterness out of his voice.

"Everything."

Morgan looked at her for a long moment before nodding. He turned and walked back into the chapel.

Anna watched him go wondering if she could ever fix what she'd broken.

*******

"A kind and gentle soul….."

John Casey forced himself to focus on Ellie's tearful words. But he was finding it harder and harder to concentrate.
Professionally it was hard for John to sit there and listen to Chuck's sister knowing he hadn't done everything he could to save him.
Personally John found his emotions slipping through his tight control. Between Sarah's abrupt departure and Ellie's eulogy…..

"A beloved brother who would do anything….'

Memories of that day came back with a vengeance as Ellie's words washed over him.
Chuck's determination to save Morgan….
The vibration under his feet as the bomb went off….
Pulling Sarah back….the heat….the smoke…..

Casey felt his gaze drift to Chuck's picture and he had to blink as it blurred for just a second.

Heroes aren't forgotten and Casey vowed to make sure that some how Bartowski wouldn't be either.

******

For Ellie the rest of the service was a blur. A blur of sympathetic smiles, kind hands and supportive hugs.
She didn't know how she'd gotten through all the speeches. Every person in attendance had spoken kind words about her brother.
Perhaps later Ellie would remember the words but now they all merged together.
All the same.

Ellie stood with Devon and Morgan just inside the main door of the chapel as people left. The only thing registering with Ellie was Devon's strong arm around her waist.

Suddenly the last hand was shook, the last hug given.

"That's it babe, everyone's gone….you ready?"Devon asked quietly is hands gently gripping Ellie's shoulders.

Ellie looked from Devon to the open door and back again.

Gone.
Back to their lives.
While she was left with a huge hole in hers that seemed to be growing bigger.

"Ellie?"Devon called once more.

Ellie nodded not trusting her voice as she leaned into her fiancée's embrace.

Devon led Ellie out of the chapel.

Ellie took a last look at the small building and the tears began.

"I-I still can't believe he's gone."

Devon pulled her close and rested his head on top of hers as he rubbed soothing circles across her back.

"I know, babe, I know."