Ahahahahahahahahha. Sorry.

This chapter took twice as long, because I re-wrote it... twice... it just wasn't flowing right... I'm happy with how it turned out, though! So I hope it was worth the wait..!


Little can be ferocious. Birds can attest to that. If you've ever seen little birds chasing a crow away from their nest, seeing Gon and Killua go at Hisoka was something like that.

But while Gon and Killua were tiny finches, Hisoka was a dragon. He was unbeatable. He was so huge and so strong. How they could face him without hesitation was concerning. I questioned their sanity.

I grit my teeth and forced myself to stand. I loathed that I had to rely on my aura, forcing it to burn to keep me standing. It was an unfair crutch.

Gon jumped into the fight, swinging his fishing pole. Killua darted around, dodging Gon's wild swings and swiping at Hisoka with his bare fists. But as expected, Hisoka was inhumanly quick. It looked like a tightly choreographed dance as he pirouetted, jumped and flipped just out of range of their attacks.

I knew for a fact that they couldn't win. They can't even touch him... I had to think of some other way of ending this fight, before the boys got hurt. Or worse... someone hurt Hisoka. I shuddered at the thought, and out of the corner of my eye, Leorio's knife glinted at me. The blade was just out of reach of his hand, and seeing him laying there made me wonder whose fault it was. Hisoka's..? Or mine...

I clenched my fists and stoked my aura like dying embers and picked up the blade.

Using a switch blade... how desperate have I become..? I frowned down at the knife in my hand, glancing at its unconscious owner. "I'll give this back later, Oreo... for now..."

"Hisoka!" I shouted, pointing the knife at him. He was in the middle of a back-bend, avoiding a kick from Killua. He flipped onto his hands and back onto his feet, landing smoothly. "How do we pass this stupid exam of yours? What are your terms?!"

"Hmmm, interesting question.." He drawled, crossing his arms and shifting his weight to one leg. Gon's fishing lure dove for his face, he easily tilted his head out of the way. Killua ran, drawing Hisoka's eyes as he moved to flank him.

"I suppose... if any of you could land a hit on me." He said, side stepping a lure shot and redirecting a punch from Killua and smiling down at him. "Then I'd let you pass."

I twirled the knife in my hand, getting a feel for its weight as I considered that. My side was aching painfully, and my Ruby Scale was used up so my normal fighting style was out of the question. But damn me if I was going to sit around and hope they could save us! "Fine. Just one hit."

"Ohhh, but that's too simple..." Hisoka added chuckling. He grasped Killua by the wrist as the boy threw another punch. My heart stopped. "I wouldn't want to bore you."

Killua growled and punched with his other hand, aiming at his chest. Hisoka moved out of the way, pulling Killua's arm up behind him. It should have hurt like a bitch, but Killua only glared. Hisoka smirked as he leaned down over the boy's tiny frame, a snake coiled around a small animal. It was disturbing but I was rooted to the spot. "If any of you pass out during my exam, you all fail."

Hisoka's eyes shifted pointedly to me. I swallowed hard.

He was making me the weak link. I'd already almost passed out once. I felt the pressure; it made me slightly nauseated.

"... and you know what it means if you fail, Middle-School-Chan.." He reminded coolly, shoving Killua away. I swallowed hard. I need to stop making deals with a certain red haired devil...

"We're gonna die, yadda, yadda. I get it!" I shouted, charging in. He grinned, smoothly settling into a fighting stance. He beckoned me forward, with a lick of his lips. It pissed me off. And made me want to run in the other direction. But I forced myself forward, sweat running down my neck.

Killua was to my left, and Gon was to my right. I remembered Killua running around to the other side of Hisoka earlier. It was a strategic move. Good idea Killua, we've got him surrounded

We closed in, Killua with his fist, me with Leorio's knife, and Gon with his pole. I was confident. Hisoka can't avoid all of us! As I swung, he jumped in the air and I stared in shock. As Gon's lure smacked into my cheek.

Asdfajksl.

My head snapped aside and I froze. Damn.

"Ah, sorry!" Gon cried, running to me.

"Oi! Get it together, you could have dodged that!" Killua berated, glaring over his shoulder as he ran at Hisoka.

I was frozen in shock and embarrassment as Gon fussed over me. "Are you okay? I should have aimed better, I'm sorry!"

I shook my head and touched my cheek. "No, no, it was my fault, he's right! Let's go, Gon!"

He looked uncertain, but I touched his shoulder with a confident smile. "It stung like a bitch, but we need that kind of strength against Hisoka!"

He was uncertain for a moment but smiled with determination. "Right!"

I was grinning outwardly as we ran to join Killua, but inside I wept. Damn it! I really should have dodged it...!

Killua was unleashing a volley of attacks; he leapt into the air, swinging tightly controlled punches that Hisoka easily deflected and dodged. Killua scowled, bouncing back before launching himself again. This time, he flipped onto his hands and spun his legs like a helicopter.

Gon and I came to a stop at a safe distance. Woah, good idea. That's a wide ranged attack.

But Hisoka proved it was a bad idea. Grabbing Killua's leg, he spun the boy, swinging him into the air and sending him flying aside. "Killua!"

I ran to catch him, but he was falling fast. Damn it, I'm not quick enough!

Then, as he was about to land painfully, he flipped onto his hands and feet, skidding to a safe stop. He was pissed off and indignant, but safe. I came to a stop, relieved.

"Oh good, I was worried you needed to be rescued." I said raising an eye brow. He glared at me sullenly.

"I'd never need rescuing by you." He muttered.

"Hey, what does that mean?!" I said indignantly. To the side, I heard an unsettling noise. Hisoka moaned softly as he dodged Gon's swings. I grit my teeth, glaring over at the two of them fighting. The sight of Hisoka enjoying himself upset my stomach.

"Hey, Killua. If you care about him, you need to get that guy away from Hisoka." I warned quietly. Killua made a thoughtful noise, moving to stand beside me.

"Hm... you're right. He's really strong..."

I cringed at that. "Uhh... yeah, and other reasons."

Hisoka let out a noise of delight as Gon made a clever attack; kicking up dirt and attacking Hisoka through the cover it provided. But quicker than Gon could land a hit, Hisoka had him by the throat. I cursed and started running at them. Damn it, at this rate, Hisoka's going to get so excited he.. UGH!

I really didn't want to think about what would happen if Hisoka got excited.

"Hey, didn't you say he was a pedophile..?!" I heard Killua shout behind me. I felt guilty.

"Uhh, more fighting, less chatting!"

As I approached, Hisoka threw Gon back onto his feet. The boy in green clutched his throat and glared, jumping a safe distance away.

"Mmm, not bad..." The perverted magician purred, grinning. He slid into his fighting stance and beckoned with his fingers. "... show me more."

My heart throbbed painfully. No...

I knew what was happening. It was a nightmare turned reality. For a second time. And just like before, I was helpless to stop it.

I clenched my fist around the knife. No... not yet... I can still stop this! If I move quickly, I can stop this!

"Leave him alone!" I shouted, charging at Hisoka. I didn't have a plan, only anger, a knife and the need to distract him. Hisoka glanced at me with a frown as I closed in on him. And like a latex balloon, he batted me away; my head snapped back sharply on the impact.

He hadn't attacked before... only deflected and dodged..

I couldn't move; I felt myself fall. But strangely there was no impact. My muddled head couldn't figure out why.

My head pounded and spun dizzyingly like it was in a dryer on tumble dry. I groaned. As I opened my eyes, the first thing I saw was Gon, swinging his fishing rod at Hisoka, and the jester dodging with glee. The second thing I saw, was Killua. He was holding me by my shoulders from behind, glaring in concern. As I focused, his lips turned up ruefully. I frowned.

"Ohhh, not dead yet? I was worried you were done for; that looked like it hurt." He smirked, helping me up. I scowled and shook my head to clear it. He must have caught me when I fell... damn it, I look pathetic...! "If you passed out, I was going to beat you until you woke up."

"Hmph. Not even close, Fluffy." I grunted as I rose. I'd lost Leorio's knife somewhere in the fall but didn't feel like looking for it. Irubbed the stars from my eyes and settled into a fighting stance as I watched Gon chase Hisoka. "I won't be going down anytime soon; you haven't seen anything yet!"

"Right." He scoffed, unimpressed.

I charged at Hisoka with a shout, Killua was right beside me. The man was deeply engrossed in his fight with Gon, grinning at the angry boy. When he glanced at me, it was in irritation. I grit my teeth. You can't ignore me! I'm going to stop you this time!

And then his fist was in my stomach. And my feet left the ground. I felt my eyes go wide, and the world got blurry. I felt his breath on my ear.

"You're getting in the way..." The magician muttered. He twisted his fist in my stomach and I coughed up blood. "... of my fun."

Dimly I heard Killua shout something. And then the wind was at my back, and everything was black and numb. Everything but my stomach. My stomach was pulverized agony.

Damn it... why can't I do this...? Is there nothing I can do...? I want to save him... I don't know Gon well, but I know what type of person he is. Happy, naive... innocent... just like you used to be...

I felt myself fall, and slide across the ground. This time my back took the blow, and when I came to a stop, I laid there trying not to move. It hurt so much just to breathe. I wasn't sure how long I laid there and I didn't hear him approach. But I felt his shadow cover me. I opened my eyes slowly. For a moment everything was blurry. When he came into focus, his expression was devoid of emotion.

"He's right, you know." Killua said. For a moment I was shocked.

"W-what?!"

"You're in the way. And you're not helping"

I clenched my fists in the dirt. "Killua!"

"Your punches are pathetic, your form is sloppy, and your reactions are slow. That's why he can knock you away so easily. And why you got hit by Gon's attack. You're out classed."

It stung. So much. To hear it voiced out loud. Even if I knew it deep down inside... I didn't want to hear it. Not from him!

"Stay out of the fight, Clearian." He said, turning and walking away. "Or you're going to get us all killed."

I laid there numbly. Watching the gray, featureless sky. Counting my heartbeats.

they're right... physically, I'm no match... even with Nen, I can't keep up with them... I felt my eyes water. I'm a pathetic fighter.

….. but. I have something they don't have.

Gingerly, I raised myself onto my elbows, trembling with the effort of straining my stomach. Rolling my weight to my left elbow, I used my right hand to snap apart the buttons of my jacket.

It's probably a mistake to use this here. This isn't its intended purpose.

My Hatsu isn't meant for battle.

But what options did I have? Laying there helplessly wasn't an option.

I'll show you who's out classed...

With difficulty, I rolled onto my stomach. Like that, I couldn't see the fight, but they couldn't see what I was doing either. I pulled a pen from an inner pocket of my jacket, and from my shirt, I drew my prized possession. My journal.

If Hisoka catches me before I can finish this, he will murder me... I cringed, holding the book open with my left hand and holding the pen in my right. With my teeth I removed the cap of the pen and put the tip to paper. I have to hide this from him...

I had to use the Nen principal In. It would conceal my aura from him while I used it. But it was a higher form of Zetsu, and seeing how I was complete garbage at Zetsu, I was going to have a rough time. But damn it, I have to try!

Closing my eyes, I focused on my aura. It was like I could feel my soul. And right then, it was weak and fluttering about, like plastic full of holes in a wind. Taking a breath, I gripped my aura with my mind; it stilled accordingly. And carefully, I pulled it inwards, compacting it against my skin. The trick was in reigning it inwards, but not extinguishing it all together; it was like making a thin shell out of my soul. And mine felt brittle.

But still, it was In nonetheless!

I opened my eyes, and touched pen to paper. And wrote because my life depended on it.

A Book of Lies.

The words I wrote were in my own language of squiggles and curls; no one else would be able to read it. But as my pen flew, vivid images formed in my head. And they weren't pretty.

All was fire. I fell to my knees and the agony consumed my sanity. Every inch of me was blazing, burning fire and the will to survive...

I never expected to be in this predicament.

I just wanted to pass this stupid exam, avoid all the craziness of the Hunter world, and live happily with my best friend. I never wanted to see him again.

Hisoka. The Magician.

It was his fault that all of this happened, that my friend was in a coma, that I was taking this exam, that I was fighting him in the first place. He was my worst nightmare. A killer. That preyed on the innocence of the people I cared for.

From the moment I saw him with my friend... I never wanted to see him again. I never wanted to think of him again. And yet here I was.

Probably going to be killed by him.

I winced as my aura bucked against my tight grip on it. Sweat rolled down my neck. It was like trying to hold an enraged bull on a leash; trying not let it go, but not pull too hard either.

If I let it go, then my aura would alert Hisoka. He'd gladly he'd end my life. But on the other hand, if I pulled back my aura too hard and didn't give it enough juice, my Hatsu would fail altogether. I didn't have the energy for another go.

My brow was pinched so hard it hurt. I was gripping my pen so hard its plastic creaked against my fingers. … fled my body and I laid there weak and helpless, I would rather...

For an instant, my concentration broke, and from between the cracks in my mind, my aura slipped out, springing rebelliously to life. Damn it.

I tried desperately to piece back together, but in the corner of my eye, Hisoka's head snapped in my direction. Gon's fishing pole came down on his shoulder in his moment of distraction, but Hisoka didn't care.

His switch was flipped. Like a hungry predator smelling blood in the water. A card slid into his fingers like fangs on a cobra.

Damn it! I was so close to finishing! ... be burnt alive one hundred times...

My heart throbbed in panic as he threw the card at me. I can't move!

But Gon leapt in front of it, knocking it down with his fishing pole. Absently, Hisoka kicked him aside.

Panic gripped my chest and my hand wobbled so badly I could barely read the words … than be put through... He turned towards me. And ran. I don't have enough time! In a white blur, Killua dashed between us. But as soon as he appeared, Hisoka batted him away. And not kindly. I scrawled frantically. … the hell of ever thinking... Gon raised his fishing pole over his head with a roar and brought it down on Hisoka's skull, but it might as well have been a wet noodle. Hisoka was unphased. I can't stop now! A tidal wave of aura. A fifty foot wall of sweeping death was coming to claim my life. To blow it out like a candle in a hurricane. I didn't have time to finish, but I had to try! … of hurting a child ever agai-

I should have ran.

I could have taken the exam next year.

Then I wouldn't be killed like this.

By a literal clown.

Maybe this has all been some terrible joke.

I wish it had been.

Hisoka had his hand around my neck. My feet dangled and my Hatsu crumbled around me and the pen fell from my fingers. Like shattered glass, the scene faded from my mind and my words on their page lost their magic. I was numb. Numb to everything but him. His tight, manic smile. His hot fingers strangling me. Beneath his wavering restraint I could smell it. The wild desire to rip me apart and bathe in my warm blood. To make me scream and break my bones. It smelled like sweet, sweet ambrosia.

Vividly, I heard him breathe. Felt him shiver and saw him lick his lips. Cold sunk into my bones as he whispered, trembling with excitement yet and dark and soft as velvet. "Ahhh... that Hatsu of yours... I really do detest it...if you use that..." He tightened his grip and groaned."I really can't control myself..."

Dimly, I heard Gon's battle cry as he swung at Hisoka again, but this time he didn't ignore him. He was too aroused. I'd awoken the monster in him.

My plan had failed and there was nothing any of us could do now.

Hisoka's freehand whipped out and snatched Gon by his little throat. The fishing rod fell from his hands. I closed my eyes. I couldn't bear to watch. … I'm sorry Gon... I couldn't breathe. My throat was fire. I felt my body raise higher in the air. … I really tried to save you...

Through the black fog of surrender I heard his enraptured moan."Mmm... look at you... so fresh... so... mouth watering..."

.. I tried... I'm sorry Clear.

I just wanted to sleep... let the sweet darkness take me... and gently drift away...