Summary: It was the strangest, most painful feeling ever to miss someone who was standing right in front of her. He was there before her eyes, but what was hurting her was that in just a moment, he wouldn't be.
Words: 536
A/N: Here I am just now writing my first entry to Zutara Month 2016 and it's already day 5. Tarty to the party as always..
Saudade — a longing to be near again to something or someone that is distant, or that has been loved and then lost; the love that remains.
In the times that he was with her, Katara liked to believe that he would stay with her forever. She would convince herself that he wasn't in the military and that he didn't have to leave. For a while, it would soothe her, ease her heartache. And just when she would get comfortable with his constant presence, he would leave and Katara would be rudely awakened from her dreams.
This was the millionth time she had to watch him leave; watch him throw the backpack over his shoulder and walk away with one last smile before joining his fellow soldiers. She could never get used to it — every time he left her she had to keep herself from breaking. He was a solider, her soldier, and she was proud of his bravery. But she was scared. Any goodbye could be their last. She clutched at his chest, fisting the fabric of his jacket. "You could just stay," she said desperately. She always said that, every time with so much emotion that she could see the way his resolve would falter.
"Believe me, if I could, I would," he replied in the same way he always did to her plea for him to stay. He sighed and grabbed her hand that was at his chest.
Katara smiled bitterly. "But you're a soldier to this nation. I come second to that."
Zuko frowned and shook his head. "No, you will always come first, Katara," he kissed her hand. "Please don't ever forget that."
"And yet you keep signing on for more terms," Katara glared at him and knew she was being ridiculous, but he shouldn't have expected her to take this well.
"Katara," Zuko sighed heavily, bringing her closer to him, grasping her face between his hands. "It's my duty as a soldier, as a citizen of this country. But you know that I love you and that I'll always come back for you."
Katara looked at him through teary eyes. "What if you don't, Zuko. What if something happens—"
She was interrupted by a pair of lips on hers and suddenly the world around her froze. In a matter of seconds she threw her arms around his neck, holding onto him for dear life. It was the strangest, most painful feeling ever to miss someone who was standing right in front of her. He was there before her eyes, kissing her and holding her, but what was hurting her was that in just a moment, he wouldn't be.
A voice resounded and suddenly Zuko pulled away from her. "They're calling me. It's time to go."
Katara felt tears pour down her cheeks, but she nodded. "Okay," she smiled. "Be careful, and come back safe."
Zuko smiled and held out his pinky finger for her take. She intertwined hers with his tightly. "I'll always come back."
And that was all he said before he turned to walk away, offering her one last smile before he faced the opposite direction. Katara watched his back until he boarded and suddenly she felt so cold. It was as if he was already oceans apart.
She cried. She knew he'd come back, but that didn't make the distance any easier.
