Ruth continued to moan indignantly as our lifeboat was slowly lowered. I felt sorry for her – it seemed to me that she was smothering her daughter, but I knew too well that awful feeling of leaving someone you love on a ship in distress.
That was when it hit me – I had been persuaded into a lifeboat the night my parents died. My sister and I had left them, albeit unwillingly, on a sinking ship. It couldn't possibly be that I had just been persuaded to leave my fiancé in the same position...could it? I suddenly felt sick – it was too late to climb back on board now that the lifeboat was in the water. But all I wanted was to stay with Will until he got into a lifeboat. Still...he had promised that he would be alright. He would never have said that if he wasn't sure. I took a deep breath. Will would be getting the passengers into lifeboats, then get into one himself. A rescue ship was on its way, and anyway...Titanic was unsinkable.
I shook my head and looked around me. The boat was half-full at most. I could only recognise Ruth, Molly and the seaman who was standing at the stern. What was his name? I racked my brain for a moment, until I remembered – Hitchens. He seemed terrified as he turned and looked up at Titanic. There were two men pulling on the oars and only one was a seaman. However, even he did not seem too capable of rowing. Hitchens was trying to make the two men row quicker, with little success – and that didn't seem to improve his mood.
"Keep pulling. We'll pull together!"
He looked at the ship behind him, an expression of terror crossing his face.
"We gotta get away from this ship..." he muttered, before looking back at the seaman. "Keep pulling. You on the starboard side – you're not pulling evenly!"
The seaman he pointed at was struggling with his oar, "Sorry, sir!"
Hitchens continued, "Pull!"
Molly shifted herself around to face the young seaman who held the oar.
"You look like a duck with a broken wing," she commented in a duller tone of voice than was usual. "Ain't you ever rowed a boat before, sonny?"
The seaman was trying not to break his concentration, and simply shook his head. "No, ma'am."
Molly sighed and motioned for him to move away. "Give me that oar. I'll show you how it's done."
My eyes widened as she took hold of the oar and moved into his seat. I had never seen a woman row before – although, I reasoned, there was no reason why she shouldn't. Hitchens didn't try to stop her, he simply continued with his orders.
"Now, pull! Pull! Pull!"
Ruth had become oddly quiet. She and Molly were staring up at the ship we had just left. I followed their gaze and felt my breath catch – from our new position the extent of the danger was obvious. Titanic was sinking. The bow was barely visible above the ocean. What had happened to cause this ship to start sinking? I couldn't even begin to grasp how it could be possible that the unsinkable ship was, in fact, sinking. I heard Molly mutter something to Ruth.
"Now there's something you don't see everyday."
A rocket was fired from the bridge – if it had been in other circumstances, I would have considered the bright explosion against the clear, starlit sky to be beautiful. At that moment, however, I felt my heart drop into my stomach. This was like a nightmare, one I had lived through once and prayed I'd never live through again.
I just stared at the ship, unable to grasp what was happening. The ship was sinking! Will was still onboard! No, he said a rescue ship was on the way. We would be picked up and safe before the ship went down. He had promised. I shook my head and felt a smile form on my lips. I'd be back with Will in an hour or so.
Hitchens was still ordering the rowers to move faster. His voice was beginning to grate on my nerves.
"Put your backs into it! Pull!"
We had managed to put a decent distance between ourselves and the ship – although I wasn't convinced that anyone knew where we were going. Suddenly a whistle could be heard from the sinking ship. Hitchens ignored it.
"Pull. Come on, put your backs into it! Pull! Pull!"
Another rocket was fired into the sky, and everyone paused as they gazed up at it as it lit up the sky. Hitchens sighed, before continuing.
"Pull! Pull! Come on, pull! Pull!"
Another whistle was heard, followed by a voice from the sinking ship.
"Hey, out there! Come back to the ship! Boat six, come back to the ship!"
I squinted, trying to work out where the voice was coming from. I gave up, distracted by Molly. She stopped rowing.
"Stop!" She called out. "We have to go back!"
"No! The suction will pull us down if we don't keep going!" Hitchens snapped, seemingly determined to terrify everyone in the boat.
"We've lots more room!" Molly responded loudly, looking at the rest of us for support. "I say we go back!"
"No!" Hitchins snapped again. "It's our lives now, not theirs. And I'm in charge of this boat, madam. Now row!"
He roared this command at her. Molly frowned, looked around once more and then continued to row. Another whistle was heard, causing Hitchens to peer back over his shoulder.
"This is the captain! This is the captain! Come back to the ship!"
The calling was in vain. Hitchens was terrified, and rightly so. He had no intention of returning, not to a sinking ship. It seemed so logical and yet...so utterly and completely wrong.
