Alice and Jasper sat in the back seat of the car, Carlisle and Emmett in the front. They were driving back to the hotel where Alice and Jasper had stayed with Bella, and Edward was going to the hospital with her at the moment.
The four vampires had decided that the best way to explain Bella's condition was to simply say that she fell down some stairs at the hotel. It would take a second for Carlisle to slip behind the desk and change their checkout date and time and then some acting. Simple enough, but for a fall that drastic, they needed to create some evidence. Alice and Emmett had playfully argued over which one of them could do a better job, in the end deciding that they would rock, paper, scissors for it.
Naturally, Alice won.
They drove in silence for a few minutes before Jasper felt one of her visions coming. He put a hand on her shoulder as her eyes went blank for two seconds before he felt her abruptly pull out of the vision. He knew by the look on her face that it had not been over yet. She had forced it out of her head--something that she had done only twice in his time knowing her.
She glanced quickly at him, meeting his eyes, looking for reassurance and finding it there.
"Carlisle, may I see the camera please?" Alice asked, knowing the answer already.
"If you want to see it like this, right now, then of course," he said supportively, handing it back to her.
She nodded, "I started to See it. I should watch it now."
She and Jasper looked at each other at the same time. Are you sure? his face asked.
Something along the lines of Its time. was her face's reply.
Her hands shook slightly as she took it. Jasper could feel her nervousness. He cupped his hands under hers to steady them, helping her hold it straight. He admired her calm expression, seeing through it even if Carlisle and Emmett did not. She was afraid.
Her tiny fingers snapped the screen open and hit play in half of a second. Jasper appreciated Carlisle and Emmett's silence as the tape began.
He could hear the rolling of the tape in the background as they saw James torturing Bella. He could feel Alice's pain at seeing her friend hurt, and relief that it was over. But then they continued to watch:
"…The answer was there all along…only time my prey escaped me…stole her from the asylum where he worked…didn't notice the pain…stuck in that black hole of a cell for so long…asylum…shock treatments…like she'd never seen the sun before…no reason for me to touch her then…destroyed the old one in vengeance…I get you, but they get her…regret that I never got to taste…smelled even better than you…."
Guilt. Pain. Regret. Sadness. Confusion. Her emotions swirled so quickly that he could barely keep up. He couldn't take it anymore and snapped the screen shut, grabbing the camera from her. He was trying with all his might not to fling it out the window, in case she wanted to keep it. He knew she might want to, at least just for a short time. It was the only key to her past right now.
Alice continued to stare at where the camera had been a moment ago. She was very still, frozen, breathless. He could still feel those same emotions coming slower now, but still no where near normal feeling.
He could barely process it himself. An asylum. In a dark cell. Alice in the dark. No wonder she couldn't remember anything. In the dark. She was so light and full of life…how could anyone keep her in the dark? He started to get caught up in his own emotions and pulled back. She needed him right now.
He decided quickly to use a familiar technique to help her focus. Sometimes an intense vision could make her emotions flash rapidly like this and it was hard for her to sort it out. The only difference now was that it was real.
"Focus," he murmured.
He watched her finally take a breath. "Good. Breathe."
She listened to him, slowly breathing in and out again, her eyes still distant, staring silently straight ahead.
"Good," he whispered faintly, "Now focus. Find one thought and focus," he continued slowly.
She continued to breathe and he felt her emotions slowing down. During a vision, he could feel her become more calm as she did this, but today was different. There was no calm right now. He itched to help her feel any type of serenity, but controlled himself. He knew what she needed.
He felt her feel her emotions slower, finally focusing on one. The others were still in the immediate background, but she had pulled this one up front. Guilt. And also Regret. They were faint at first, and then very strong. Very strong. He took a breath to steady himself. This was only the first round. But they would do this together and pull through.
She turned her head to look at him and he felt a very small bit of calm sneak into her. He wasn't sure if she noticed it, but he was glad it was there. The guilt and regret still overwhelmed everything else, though. Before she could ask, he shook his head to answer.
She disagreed, nodding yes.
"This is not your fault," he said aloud, forcefully, but quietly.
Her face asked How is it not?
"He would have done it either way. He enjoys torture and twisted mind games." He replied so intensely that she really did believe him. But she couldn't push it all out of her head…
"Alice. Focus. This did not happen because of you," he repeated, softly but firmly.
She didn't directly respond, but the guilt subsided enough that she could focus on the next round of emotions. Pain and Sadness.
He could barely endure feeling Alice experience so much negative emotion. He took her hand lightly, his eyes pleading her to let him take some of it away. She shook her head no and he understood why, but he didn't like it. She didn't deserve to suffer like this, feel so much pain. He knew that they would talk at length about everything together soon, but right now she needed to sort out what she was feeling.
"Jazz…my parents…I must have had them…but…they didn't…" she trailed off, her brow crinkling as confusion weaved in and out of the pain and sadness.
Her expression broke him. He couldn't just watch her hurting like this. It was torturous to him to see her this way. But he knew she knew this, and neither of them regretted it. It was just the way it was. They would do this together.
Alice reflexively breathed to try to calm herself.
She then searched for an answer in his face, "Jasper…what did I do wrong as a human? Why would my family lock me away? Could I have been terrible? Possibly dangerous?" she whispered.
He didn't have to touch her, hug her, kiss her, or embrace her in any way at that moment. He was openly feeling so much love toward her, especially at that moment, that it a simple touch would be pointless. It could never match his feelings for her, and he let her feel that.
"Alice, there is nothing, and I mean nothing that you could have done to have deserved any of that. You did not do wrong. And I don't know how someone could just throw their family…their child…into an asylum...and let people keep them locked up…and treat them like animals. But you have never been terrible. And there is no way that they could believe that their child was dangerous." Jasper replied passionately, his eyes burning into hers.
She closed her eyes, nodding, still taking everything in. She had so many questions…so much to think about.
"Maybe they never saw her on a shopping spree. Pretty dangerous, in my opinion…" Emmett chimed in from the front seat.
Jasper had almost forgotten about Carlisle and Emmett being there. He felt Alice's mood lighten ever so slightly at Emmett's comment, and he smiled reassuringly to her.
He felt her push back the emotions she was feeling, the confusion and wonder still dominant, but the pain and sadness covered for the moment. "Hey, don't tease me just because you're a terrible rock paper scissors player," she replied.
He grinned back at her as they pulled into the hotel parking lot.
Jasper and Alice exchanged a quick glance before entering the hotel.
Will you be all right? Can I do anything? was displayed on Jasper's face.
You're here, that's all I need now. Alice's eyes revealed.
He knew that they would get a chance to verbally talk when back in Forks. Right now, they had to protect their charade.
To Be Continued…
Part two of this chapter comes next, hopefully soon. Reviews make me very happy, even if it's just one word. =) Thanks!
