L and the Death Note


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Raito had been living with L for a little over a week before disaster struck. Which wasn't to say that things had been all fine and dandy before, because they HADN'T, but still, things got even worse.

For one thing, the investigation of the Kira case had been kicked back into full gear because of the recent slew of deaths (the O.C. cast) and this meant that in addition to his continuing battles with the paperclip, Raito also had to work side by side with L on a detective mission to capture himself. To top it all off, Raito was fatter than he had been since eighth grade, all because L forced inordinate amounts of sugar and candies down his throat at every meal. L insisted that the weight served Raito well, filling his curves out (Raito shuddered to think why L had been thinking about that), but Raito had never felt worse.

Things were about to get even more crazy, though. Raito and L were dining, if you could call it that, when Watari appeared and whispered something into L's ear. Raito didn't notice the change in atmosphere immediately, because he had been inwardly glowering over the latest atrocity of the paperclip, but his head snapped up when L called his name the third time.

"Yagami-kun, we have a new lead on the Kira case," said L seriously, dropping his napkin on the table and getting up. "I think we should go and check it out immediately."

Raito's stomach plummeted. What new lead? He hadn't done anything in the past few days out of line…had he?

But L lead him over to the main working area and turned on the television, where the announcer was talking about some video that they had received from Kira. It was a strange video, asking to meet the original Kira. Who was this person? Raito's mind flashed over numerous possibilities.

"I think I have an idea of who this new killer may be," said L sagely, chewing his thumb as he avidly stared at the screen.

"What? Who!?" asked Raito, feeling quite panicked.

"Well, Watari figured it out," L admitted, leading Raito over to the computer monitors. "We suspect…her!" he pointed to a picture of the up and coming model, Amane Misa.

"How the hell did you come to that conclusion?" Raito asked, utterly nonplussed.

"Actually, I have no idea." Said L. "To be honest, Watari does most of the thinking around here; I'm just the figurehead detective. But Watari seems convinced that she has something to with the case, so I'm going to keep an eye on her for a few days."

Raito stared at L, unable to believe that he had considered him a rival. "You—you've already set up perving cameras, haven't you?" he finally asked.

L nodded. "And they're high tech investigation cameras," he corrected.

XxX

Raito and L spent the next several days watching Misa on camera. It was not as fun as it sounded. L got up every five seconds to get more candy from the kitchen, so Raito could never get into a comfortable position on the couch. And moreover, Raito couldn't really concentrate on the video because he was always worrying about the paperclip and what its next move would be.

"Oh my God!" said L suddenly, pointing at the videos.

"What! What is it?" asked Raito.

"She's got a tanline. Look." L pointed it out to Raito while Watari chuckled warmly in the background.

Raito shot a look of disbelief at L. Truth be told, the paperclip was a much more formidable opponent than L had ever been.

After five days of observation, there were more deaths and L himself visited the crime scene to collect evidence.

L carefully considered and put together his findings.

Raito entered the investigation room to find L examining a pile of junk with utmost intensity.

"What's that?" asked Raito, unconcernedly, dropping his backpack onto a desk and logging onto his laptop.

"Evidence from the case," said L pensively. "I think we've got her pinned down this time!"

"Why, what've you got?" Raito asked vaguely, typing up a review of the investigation so far, and making it GRAMMATICALLY PERFECT.

"Nothing particularly incriminating," said L sadly. "I just can't figure out the weapon used to do the killings. It's like this killer had some sort of supernatural powers to kill people just by will, or something…"

Raito hastily changed the subject. "What's the evidence?"

"Well, I did find this hair on the sofa!" said L triumphantly, holding out a small plastic bag.

Raito frowned at it.

"…what does that have to do with anything?"

"It's evidence!" said L crossly. "It has a lot to do with the crime!"

"L, that looks like yours," said Raito, tiredly. "Are you sure you didn't shed it while you were over there and then find it again and think it was evidence?"

"It's got to be Misa's!" L shouted.

"It's short and black!"

"Maybe she has a cat! Yes, that would explain everything!" said L suddenly, getting a faraway look in his eyes. "It all makes sense now! She has a cat that sheds and she keeps it in the room that she murders people in! YEAH!"

Raito rolled his eyes. "Anything else?"

"Yeah, I also found this paperclip," said L, holding out another plastic bag.

Every muscle in Raito's body tensed.

He slowly turned to look at the evidence.

"Check it out," said L, shaking the small plastic bag containing a single paperclip at Raito.

Raito's insides turned to ash. What was he going to do? In the back of his mind, he knew that the paperclip couldn't hurt him from inside the plastic bag, but he really didn't want to be any closer to it than necessary. On the other hand, refusing to examine the evidence would probably look suspicious from L's point of view.

"Raito-kun?" L asked, snapping Raito out of his reverie. "Take it."

"Get that thing away from me," said Raito, saying the first words that entered his mind. L be damned. Case be damned. Kira be damned, Raito was not touching that thing!

L frowned. "What's the matter? I just thought that we could maybe pick up some evidence like a fingerprint from it…"

"Get it away," Raito repeated, pushing his rolling chair so that he was on the other side of the room.

"Raito, what's gotten in to you? Come look at it!"

"NEVER!" Raito got up to run.

With surprising speed, L caught up to him and pinned him to the wall.

"Is Raito-kun afraid of paperclips?" he asked softly.

"No! That's ridiculous! Leave me alone!" Raito broke loose and scurried over to the desk to turn off his computer. However, as he tried to close the Word document, the paperclip popped up, asking him if he wanted to save the changes made to the document. It also tapped its tail at Raito while gazing at him in a very annoying, bulbous way.

"Bastard!" Raito cried, momentarily ignoring L. "Do I want to save the changes? Do I want to save the changes? If I wanted to save the changes, wouldn't I have saved them?! Who do you think you're talking to?"

Ah, it's the computer talk again! thought L. I'd better get a closer look.

He peered around the computer and saw a flash of the paperclip before it vanished with the Microsoft document.

"Aha! So Raito-kun is afraid of paperclips!"

"I'm—not!" said Raito through gritted teeth. "It's just a phase—"

"Then why won't you look at the evidence?"

Raito screamed as L pushed the bag into his face.

"Come on, you're too cute to be scared of this," said L playfully, taking the paperclip out of the bag.

"L, I swear to Kira…" Raito was very pale. "If you...take one step toward me with that thing....."

L grinned. "You'll what?"

"You don't want to know!"

"I really do."

"Why are you playing with evidence as important as that? How old are you?!"

L pounced on Raito, trying to touch the paperclip to his face.

Raito screamed and thrashed away, running to the other side of the room and almost making it out the door before L caught up and tried to tackle him.

"L—stop!" Raito begged, and L giggled slightly crazily.

In the scuffle, Raito didn't notice that his backpack had fallen off the desk. The Death Note had fallen out and skittered across the floor, coming to a rest at L's feet.

"What's this?" asked L, calming down so quickly it was almost scary and picking up the notebook.

Raito froze. This was it. This was the worst thing that could possibly ever happen to him. It was over now. And all because of that stupid, fucking paperclip.

"Death Note?" Read L aloud, looking at the cover. He glanced up at Raito. "What is this? It's yours, right?"

"Uh…yeah…" Raito's mouth had gone very dry. "That's just a…notebook of mine. A personal one. I'd like to have it back, if you don't mind."

"Now, now, now," L wagged his finger in Raito's face. "You dropped it, so I'm going to take a little peek before you can have it back."

"No!" Raito lunged at him as L started to open the book. "It's private! You can't see!"

"Oh, has Raito-chan written down his crushes in here?" L asked, putting a finger to his lips. "Just hold on; I won't look for long…"

"Stop—!"

Raito and L had another little scuffle, but L managed to open the Death Note and scan a few pages.

The childish smile melted off L's face.

Raito buried his face in his hands, bracing himself for death or imprisonment, or a future as L's sex slave, depending on L's mood.

"Raito-kun…" L said seriously, turning to face him with a blank look. "This is…not right."

"It's private…" Raito said again.

"Raito-kun, do you think I'm stupid? I know what this is." Said L in a deadpan voice.

There was a long pause. Raito closed his eyes.

Then L shouted, "It was your list of old crushes! I knew it!"

Raito's eyes snapped back open and he looked up, not daring to believe his ears.

"Yes, it all makes sense now…" said L, partially to himself, leafing through the Death Note. "Raito-kun didn't want me to see because he didn't want me to know that he is gay. But it's alright! Because, you may not have guessed it yet, but I'm gay too!"

"You're—kidding?" Raito managed, sarcasm coming through despite his shock. "I would never have guessed!"

"Yes, it's true!" said L grandly, batting his eyelashes. "I know I am very good at hiding it, but the truth comes out now. I've liked you since I first met you!"

Raito blanched.

L looked back down at the book. "Hm, you had crushes on Ray Penbar and Misora Naomi." He noted. "That's weird, they both died a few months ago, didn't they?" he shook his head. "What a strange coincidence. Well, here's your book back!" he dropped the Death Note back down to Raito.

Raito stared up at him, feeling utterly wrong footed. Was L a complete idiot or…was something else going on?

"More importantly," L knealt by Raito. "Now that the secret is out…"

Raito gulped.

"You have no excuse not to mate with me!" L said triumphantly.

"…"

"…"

"…What!?" Raito bellowed. "This is madness! I won't allow this!"

"Oh, but you must!" said L delightfully threading his fingertips together. "Otherwise, I might just tell your father that his cute little son is a little bit…that way."

"You wouldn't!" Raito said harshly. "And you had no right to go through my notebook! This was all a mistake!"

"Fine," L abruptly stood up, and walked back to his seat. "I'm not going to force you if you don't want to. But you will like me, Raito. I guarantee it." He nailed Raito with one of those creepy stares.

Raito unsteadily got to his feet as well, trying to regain his composure. He stuffed the Death Note back into his bag. At least now he wouldn't have to hide it, since L had already seen it and determined that it was a list of crushes.

"I'm going to the bathroom," Raito announced. "I'll see you…around."

"Undoubtedly," L replied. Raito shuddered. That probably meant that L was going to be watching him on his creepy cameras later. Raito backed away and left the room., cursing the day that God had created paperclips.


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