1:32PM
Rocket Scientist
So I think you need to give me a bunch of last minute advice, Clarke
Clarke took a moment from putting away groceries to peer down at her most recent message, grinning at Raven's theatrics. The girl had been amped up for her date with Anya today, but it seemed last second jitters were getting the best of the usually unflappable Raven Reyes.
1:33PM
Clarke
Raven Reyes, are you freaking out right now?
1:33PM
Rocket Scientist
It's just you know her, there's gotta be some tricks up your sleeve that could make this perfect
Clarke chuckled at her friend before setting her phone down and finishing putting away the few things she'd grabbed to stock up the apartment. Letting Raven sweat a little was a little fun, especially in moments where it was harmless. She knew Raven didn't actually expect any inside information, her friend just wanted to have a distraction, if just for a little while.
1:38PM
Clarke
You're gonna have to make that bed yourself, Asami
Clarke's phone pinged before she even had time to set it down again, which clued her in to the fact that she'd likely spend the next twenty minutes before Raven's final exam helping soothe her friend's nerves. Not a bad way to spend her afternoon.
1:48PM
Rocket Scientist
Oh fuck you for making me smile even when you're denying me the haul of secrets you've learned from her. Though thinking of her as the Korra to my Asami is cute as shit.
Clarke plopped herself down on her sofa and stretched out, legs a little sore from having twisted one after chasing Anya through a park. To her credit, Anya HAD shoved handfuls of snow down the back of her jacket. And maybe she'd stumbled in seeking vengeance, Anya also intercepting her and facewashing her in a snow bank for her efforts. Still, she'd managed to steal one of Anya's boots, ensuring her friend suffered the rest of the walk with a soaked foot. Clarke took minor victories where she could.
1:49PM
Clarke
You do realize that my befriending Anya wasn't an elaborate ploy to gain critical and sensitive intelligence on her, though, right?
1:50PM
Rocket Scientist
You're just telling me this NOW?! Ugh back to square one
1:50PM
Rocket Scientist
But seriously, I know I have to handle this myself, get to know her and all. But...any last minute advice?
Clarke pondered over what to say, unsure whether to really delve too deep into advice. She felt that the two were a good match, but she didn't want to force anything, or influence them. They seemed to be coming together pretty well on their own, and Clarke thought that was pretty special.
1:51PM
Clarke
Honestly, just keep doing what you've been doing. Make her laugh, stay curious about her and who she really is. She likes when you compliment her smile, but I didn't have to tell you that. And don't tell her I said even that pls
1:52PM
Rocket Scientist
Well I guess it's the thought that counts, haha. Gotta get to my exam, wish me luck, Griffin!
Clarke just smiled down at her screen, all the confidence in the world that Raven was going to have a great day.
1:52PM
Clarke
You don't need luck, you've got mad skillzzzzz. I have complete faith in you.
Moments later, Raven went offline, leaving Clarke to an afternoon of general boredom. She'd met O for lunch after her morning walk with Anya, but her roommate was probably just now finishing up an exam and had plans to head to Lincoln's right after. She'd reached out to Monty, one of Octavia's closer friends who she'd enjoyed the company of, but the boy had left campus to head home for the holidays already, like most people she knew. Anya was always an option, but she didn't want to feel like she was smothering her newest friend. Besides, Anya got a lot more reading done without her around, and the woman had noted some frustration about not having finished enough books during the break so far.
So she splayed out on her couch and mentally ran through the list of things she had yet to watch or finish on Netflix. Tangerine had just been added, and she was pretty excited about that one, but she wasn't sure she had the right mindset to head into that, at least not at the moment. She'd made another payment to the school earlier that day, and it only reminded her of the fact that there really wasn't much of an end in sight for her. Not unless she sold her dad's condo, and Clarke was not ready to let that go just yet. There were too many memories, and since she couldn't go back home, she was holding tightly onto what she still had left. Maybe that wasn't entirely healthy, years after the fact, but she wasn't ready to let go. Not while she still had unfinished business left.
The buzzing of her phone drew her from her thoughts; Clarke checked the time and saw it was six after, so it couldn't be Raven. When it buzzed again right afterwards, she swiped at her phone, curious.
2:06PM
OshKoshBlakeGosh
claaaaaaaarke
2:06PM
OshKoshBlakeGosh
help me b a good gf 4 xmas
Clarke rolled her eyes at O's inability to text in full sentences, and got to responding, knowing if O was texting her about ideas instead of her brother or Monty, it must be an emergency.
2:07PM
Clarke
Lingerie + an X-Pole for his basement rec room. Done and done
Clarke counted down in her head, knowing O was about to put her on blast any second, even if the girl wouldn't deny how effective the gifts would be, or whether O would have already thought of them.
2:08PM
OshKoshBlakeGosh
jerk!1 but srsly i gotta leave smth for his bday in feb, n I wanna be good by then. Poles gotta w8.
Her mind went through past memories with Octavia's boyfriend, combing through discussions and anecdotes for a clue, eventually stumbling on one that had Clarke smiling.
2:09PM
Clarke
You could be a total sap and get him some kitchen stuff like a roasting pan, some pots, that kind of thing. He's brought up wanting to host some family dinner stuff at least twice now, complaining he doesn't have any hardware in his kitchen.
2:09PM
Clarke
That could make him really happy, but talk with Anya about it first, she might have already got him something along those lines.
2:10PM
OshKoshBlakeGosh
UR PERFF! But srsly i gotta givem a cookbook hes so bad at it even if hes cute trying to make something edible.
Clarke just smiled, having heard enough stories about Lincoln's inability to care for his home to believe that the man had some difficulty cooking, even if his heart was always in the right place. It really was a cute idea, him wanting a tighter knit weekend family dinner between him, Anya and Lexa, to keep everyone connected and local going forward, which would especially be helpful once Anya graduated. Given her friend's worries, Clarke could only imagine something like that would go a long way to keep Anya and Lexa closer and happier.
More buzzing had Clarke reaching for her phone, but there weren't any new alerts. Which had her reaching in front of her, digging in her bag for her other phone, her heart dropping in her chest when she saw the contact's name.
Memories of the last night spent with him flashed through her mind, and she had to bite back the nausea at the anxiety and disgust that bubbled up. Gotta keep it together, Clarke...it's just a text...who knows what he wants this time...
She took a deep steadying breath and unlocked her phone, checking the message.
2:11PM
Dr. Leekie
I'm inquiring as to whether I could reserve you for a private party tonight between the hours of ten and midnight. The same services are required as last event. If you can be available, respond by seven this evening at the latest. If you require more details, they can be made available on request.
Pure business, like the last four times. Clarke let a shudder ripple through her as she sat back, wondering what to do. The first three times, her dealings with the man had been somewhat tame. A little violent, but paddling a naked guy's ass wasn't exactly traumatizing. But the last time around had been too much, had shaken her to her core, and while she left physically unscathed and with a lot of money, it'd been very hard to handle, and far out of her comfort zone. A rookie mistake, for sure, but knowing what she knew now, she still wasn't certain she should decline.
It was a lot of money. The kind of money she could make in the span of a few days of solid bookings which would be a huge boon. Her short term goals, financially, had been to secure the funds for next year's admission fees and the cost of living over the summer, minus lodging, by the time the winter semester was over. She was just barely ahead of schedule, but something like this, a difficult two hour booking that would probably only require her for half of that time, could put her a half week ahead, give her more flexibility so that if something happened, she could deal without working for a little longer than otherwise. Which was a big deal, since if she didn't reach her goals for the year, then she'd for sure be working from a deficit constantly in the coming months, trying to keep her head above water. Not a fun prospect.
But on the other hand, the client had nearly violated her boundaries, and had made similar but less pushy attempts in the past as well. So part of her knew that the booking wouldn't be comfortable, at the very least, and it could get dicey as hell, even if she was more prepared to handle his creepy shenanigans. But the other part of her knew that she hadn't had a booking in three days, so could she really decline? Especially with her deviantart commissions running dry, and her attempts at pulling guitar lessons drawing a big fat blank.
Clarke rested her head in her hands, unsure what to do, how to handle this. Times like this, she wished she had her father to go to for advice, or Wells, and it just reminded her that sometimes she couldn't be an island and handle everything alone. Going to Octavia would be great, but she'd have to come out to her, and Clarke still wasn't certain how that would go down. Raven was in her exam for another two and a half hours, and Clarke really didn't want to put a damper on the girl's day; besides, she knew Raven would shut down everything to help her, and Clarke was too invested in Raven's happiness to let the girl do that.
Which left Anya. Anya who could handle serious matters and then compartmentalize them. Anya who could flip a switch between being a snarky prankster and an affectionate ear to hear her out. Anya, who she hadn't particularly shared anything tremendously difficult with just yet, but who she got good vibes from.
Her phone was in her hand before she could even think.
2:28PM
Clarke
Hey, can I come over, please
Clarke barely had time to regret giving into impulse before her phone buzzed.
2:29PM
Anya
Can't get enough of me, can you? But sure, you're always welcome. I'll have Ash on the first floor watch for you and let you in.
The immediate acceptance from the woman, despite the upcoming date on her schedule, was what had Clarke tossing her coat on and heading out the door. There was nothing better than finding herself in a complex situation, and being able to find some simple solace on the way to figuring it out, even if that solace might be a little scary to pursue.
Clarke wasn't sure whether time sped up, or if she just happened to speed, but she was parking by Light Hall before she really felt ready to. Still, while her mind was awash in nerves and uncertainty over letting anyone get so close to her well-kept secrets, her body was locking her SUV up and heading into the dormitory, thanking the fellow freshman there for holding the door.
It had been months since she'd let anyone bear a shred of weight for this secret of hers, it had been months since she'd remotely dealt with what had happened that past summer, and while she knew she needed some help right then, it was scary to ask. It was terrifying to open that door and potentially have it backfire, have her trust betrayed in ways that could seriously damage her life. There was a lot riding on Anya being helpful, and not catching on to anything she wasn't ready to put out into the open yet. It all had Clarke feeling as if she was slowly being squeezed by a vise, both really needing someone to vent to and offer support, but also needing to hold onto that practiced distance because the prospect of Anya learning about her so early in their friendship was terrifying.
She felt her knees wobble under her weight as she ascended the stairs to the second level. She felt her jaw clench, mouth wired shut in fear of letting her secrets spill as she made her way down the hall, each step a heartbeat closer to collapse. She felt her hands shake as she knocked lightly at the door. She felt her lungs clench in her chest with a need for air, for her to breathe. At Anya's lazy call, she entered, body feeling tremendously heavier than it had a mere minute ago, vision glassier than seconds ago, cheeks immediately blooming red for a bouquet of reasons she had no desire to interrogate as she crossed towards Anya's bed and climbed on to meet the seated woman.
It wasn't until Anya placed her book down beside them that she realized she'd straddled the older blonde, but it seemed par for the course given things seemed to be unraveling, and she needed an anchor, if just for a little while. And as close to betrayal as her body was, as terrified and skittish as her mind seemed to be, she had to trust she'd made the right call. She couldn't do this alone, not all the time. It had to be worth the risk.
Clarke checked Anya's eyes for any sign of discomfort or protest and found none, so she let herself sag forward, head resting at the crook of the woman's neck, the world finally stilling around her, oxygen finally able to navigate its way to her laboured lungs, secrets sinking back deep inside her to their usual resting place. As her arms encircled her friend, she felt pretty confident she'd made the right call. However this played out, it'd probably be okay, so long as she was smart.
She had to trust it'd be okay.
Anya had honestly been too busy reading about a traumatized scientist to take much note of Clarke when the girl had entered the dorm. When she'd gotten the earlier text, it'd seemed unusually formal, but nothing too out of character. Clarke had texted her plenty the previous two evenings due to boredom and Anya just assumed that the blonde would rather spend her time with real live company than alone at her own dorm.
But when the blonde straddled her, all red-faced and looking a half second away from some kind of breakdown, well, it caught her off guard. Anya wasn't proud of that fact.
She also wasn't very proud that the first thing that escaped her was a surprised, if quiet, laugh. "You know I was two pages away from a chapter break." She let out awkwardly, hoping to play her initial reaction off as a joke, though the lack of response aside from Clarke's labored breathing had her returning the blonde's embrace, red flags starting to pop up. "Just breathe, Clarke. Take your time."
It took a distressingly long time for Clarke's body to relax enough for the girl's breathing to level out, and Anya fought against every little voice inside of her telling her to demand the name of whoever did this to her newest friend. As much as her fear tended to get processed directly into anger and a desire for violence, she was fairly certain that Clarke didn't need that right now. Clarke was more the kind, she felt, to take part in such personal justice, rather than let someone else do all of the grunt work.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Anya asked in hopes of gaining some answers. A muffled, wordless sound impacted against her neck, and all Anya could do was nod, because Clarke Griffin was usually much more wordy than this. The blonde was often insufferably optimistic and vocal, even if she particularly enjoyed that aspect of the girl. Even thinking back to the argument she'd overheard between Clarke and Octavia, the blonde had been tired and succinct and firm. Anya honestly had no clue as to what was going on with her newest friend, but she was thankful to have the chance to figure it out, that Clarke had gone to her.
Feeling a surge of pride and confidence in the trust Clarke showed in coming to her for some sort of comfort, Anya just held Clarke close, cradling the younger blonde's head, just giving her friend time to feel up to being vocal. She filled the silence with distracting words, a whispered breakdown of the novel she was reading, of the protagonist's struggles, of the broken world the character found herself in, of her hopes for how the author would tie the novel up.
The sun was setting outside when Clarke's grip against her shoulder blades finally shifted, alerting Anya that maybe forty minutes had passed since the blonde's arrival. "Are you up for talking, now, Clarke?" She asked quietly, earning a muffled response that sounded a lot like 'yes', which she decided to work with. "Can you tell me if you're alright or not?"
A head of wavy blonde hair nodded against her neck. "Sorry. Guess I freaked."
"Looked more like the start of a panic attack..." Anya mused with a softness she tended to reserve for such sensitive situations. She didn't want Clarke to feel accused or attacked, she didn't want her friend to get defensive. "...and you don't have to apologize for that."
"You wanted to get more reading done..." She heard Clarke start to say, and she couldn't help but scoff at the obvious and absurd deflection. Even if she was thankful it was just a part of a hopefully brief cat and mouse game until the blonde opened up to her.
"And I have, but you're here, and I can decide my own priorities, Clarke. Again...are you alright? Do you want to talk about what caused this?" She probed, hoping her firmer tone would inform her friend that she would support her, but that she wasn't going to take any of her crap in the process. Clearly, Clarke came to her for a reason, and she would get to the bottom of it before the girl left.
"Not exactly. It's not really a big deal." Clarke mumbled, an exhausted sigh washing over her shoulder.
"Big or small, I'm all ears, Clarke." She shot back, hoping that using the blonde's own words against her would manage to convince Clarke that it was safe to talk. That it had been a good decision to come to her.
Another sigh escaped Clarke before the girl turned her head and rested it on Anya's shoulder, nose slightly pressing against the older woman's neck. "It's a work thing."
Anya was quiet as she ran those whispered words over in her head, puzzling over the disparity between the words and the tone. Those same words, or an equivalent, had been used by her mother and father endlessly throughout her childhood, describing all kind of frustrating and tiring issues that they'd felt she was too young to understand. Or, later, to avoid sharing their emotions with her.
It was the utter dread in Clarke's words that didn't match up. She hadn't been friends with Clarke for incredibly long, but she'd known the girl for a few months, and had heard about the girl's odd work schedule. Still, she hadn't heard a single complaint up until now, Clarke often referring to her nights at work as 'boring' or 'decent', and so the response she'd gotten just didn't seem to match up with what she knew. Anya was used to experiencing Clarke being tired from her work, not plummeting towards a breakdown. Clearly I'm out of the loop in some way...this can't just be from sleep deprivation...
"Did something happen at work?" She asked, hoping that being a bit more direct wouldn't backfire on her.
"I'm...I'm on-call. I just got a call that messed me up a bit, I guess." Clarke admitted, though it was clear in the girl's hesitant delivery that she was choosing her words carefully. Which, well, Clarke had a right to do, but it only made Anya more worried.
"What exactly is your line of work, Clarke?" Anya countered, just about immediately regretting her decision to be direct with her curiosity yet again, but Clarke's body relaxing even more in her arms had her thinking that maybe she'd made the right call.
It took Clarke half a minute to answer, her words not really matching up with the tension that had built. "I'm a...a party planner."
Honestly, it was an odd choice of job, but it explained the odd hours of work, and the long nights out. It was no wonder that Clarke was sleep deprived if she regularly helped host parties that likely ran deep into the night. It also meant, as that vengeful voice in her head brought to mind, that Clarke likely dealt with a fair bit of wealthy, entitled clients. Clients who could have upset her friend. "What happened with the phone call? Did a client harass you?"
"No! No...well, it's...no." Clarke stammered out, not sounding the least bit convincing, which only had Anya's internal rage meter ascending closer to her murder threshold. Clarke must have sensed her tension, because the blonde was suddenly clutching at her, that perky nose lightly brushing across her neck as the girl shook her head slightly. "Hey, no. It's...I got a call from a former client of mine. He's just really creepy, and wants me to help him set something up, but he makes me really uncomfortable, and it brought back bad memories."
"Did he harass you last time? Because I could go with you. I could..." Anya started, a choked laugh cutting her off as Clarke shook her head against her.
"I haven't taken the job yet." Clarke spoke, which Anya clearly understood, with the exception of that final word.
"Yet?" It was a simple scenario. Clarke's former client creeped her out, so there was no reason to go along with him.
"He pays really well. Like...really well." Clarke asserted, and by the blonde's tone, that wasn't something the girl wanted to argue about. So, not happy at all with the notion of her friend being uncomfortable, Anya returned to the topic of the client and his job.
"What exactly does he want you to do for him, Clarke?" She asked, drawing a sigh from Clarke, but silence in place of an expected response following that. Undeterred, Anya began running her hands up her friend's back, halfway a reassuring gesture, halfway a massage to relax the suddenly tense body in her arms. "What troubles you about it?" She continued, hand lifting from the back of Clarke's head to stroke the girl's hair when more silence answered her question. A content hum escaping the blonde's throat was a glaring neon PROGRESS sign, and so she continued with that, slipping in moments of scalp massaging to hopefully coax out a few syllables, since her friend seemed to have frozen up.
It was a tiny bit of wetness hitting her neck, probably a single stray droplet, that immediately had Anya alarmed, her head impulsively turning to press her face into the head of blonde hair. It was far more physically intimate than they'd ever been but Clarke had started that trend less than an hour ago, anyways, so Anya tossed away any cares about that as her lips pressed and lingered against Clarke's head. "I'm all ears, Clarke. I have you." She promised, wanting to get past the reluctance Clarke was clinging to, wanting to get deep enough to take hold of whatever worries were bouncing around in her friend's head and suplex the fuck out of them. Until Clarke could be calm and happy and confident again.
"He..." The single word was music to her ears, as were the ragged breaths that followed as Clarke wiped that tear from her cheeks and resettled her face into Anya's neck. "He has me...hire women to attend his parties."
Anya let the statement roll over her, but it honestly took no time at all to get to the root of Clarke's meaning. Creepy client hiring women? "He wants you to hire hookers."
"Sex workers." Clarke blurted out abruptly, correcting her for whatever reason. She honestly didn't think that titles were important in the scope of their discussion. "But...yes. He has me hire sex workers. And his parties aren't...they're shady, okay? He's shady."
"You're concerned about the illegality of it, I take it? That you've already done this before, so he has something on you?" She asked, proposing about as good of a guess as she could muster at the time, though Clarke's immediately shaking head shot that down and only had her more confused.
"I mean, there's always the legal aspect, you know?" Clarke let out far more casually than she could really believe, leaving Anya feeling suddenly unsure what was eating at the blonde if not the very real legal concerns. "It's what...it's what he wants the sex worker to do that makes me uncomfortable."
Anya was still caught up in confusion, trying to wrap her head around Clarke's situation before she caught Clarke referring to a single worker, when she'd referenced plural before. It could have been nothing, but as she mulled it over, hand stroking through the blonde's hair, the pieces started to fall into place. Clarke's creeped out by this guy...she's dealt with him before, and doesn't want to again, except he pays well. She's been really evasive and careful in her wording, and has taken a lot of time to prepare her reasons, which could be emotions at play or her obscuring something. And Clarke's not worried about getting blackmailed by this guy, either. Hell, she doesn't seem worried about the law at all, like it's a run of the mill thing. Like...like it's something she deals with all the time...
Anya felt her hand freeze momentarily in Clarke's tresses as realization struck her like lightning, her head and heart fighting back against the slew of words suddenly piling up in her throat, knowing she needed to reflect before she spoke. Clarke's a sex worker...
It made sense, now, that Clarke was always out late at night and very secretive about her work and where she'd stay away from her dorm. It made sense why Clarke would be tired so often, and sometimes a little stiff and sore in the mornings. It made sense why Clarke was so freaked out about a client who made her uncomfortable before, and was shady as hell, and not the illegality of it all, since a client wouldn't be able to blackmail so easily. And it made sense that Clarke would be reluctant to turn the job down, if the girl was in that line of work out of financial desperation.
She also knew that the worst words Clarke had used to describe her work had been 'dull' and 'boring', so Clarke didn't seem to have much of a problem with it, and clearly wasn't begging Anya to help her find a way out. Which, honestly, Anya had a difficult time accepting, but Clarke had to have her reasons for staying in. She trusted in that much for now, so Anya reluctantly let herself chalk this up as a clearly bad day for Clarke, and engaged the side of herself that Lexa often referred to as 'Mama-Bear-Mode'.
Anya turned her head to press another kiss to Clarke's temple, just wanting her friend to know that she had her support in this. "If this client makes you too uncomfortable, Clarke, you can pass him up. The money might be good, but it's not worth the risk, or sacrificing your comfort for. Okay?" She murmured into the blonde's hair, earning an immediate nod. "If the money's an issue, we can work it out together."
Feeling Clarke burrow closer to her was an interesting sensation, warmth blooming in her heart all while the other side of her wondered how it was that she'd gone so long in life without a friend she could be so close with. She deeply understood the trust and loyalty that came with family, even ones without the strictest blood ties like between herself and her brother. Friends had never come easy to her, though; they had never engaged too far past a surface level, never trusted her with much, never willing to be open any more than the occasional peek here or there into their lives and dreams.
So experiencing Clarke being so warm and open and thoughtful about her family situation earlier in the week, experiencing Clarke going to her and seeking physical comfort and emotional solace, experiencing that level of trust and vulnerability, it had Anya believing that she could offer the same. That friends, at least some special ones, could weave their way into her heart like all the others who had taken residence there.
"Thanks for the offer, Anya, but...but my money's my problem. I just need to handle it myself, as much as I appreciate you willing to help. But...your point about the client...well, you might have a point." Clarke rambled, words stumbling out all thick and shaky, as if the blonde was fearful. Which was absurd, since Clarke had nothing to fear from her at all, though the woman's tense body and the undertones in her words still remained.
Is she worried I'll freak out about her if I knew the truth? Or, suspected what I suspect? Anya mused to herself, had she supposed it wasn't an entirely unreasonable fear, especially with their friendship so new, and all the consequences between that line of work and the rest of the blonde's life. I wonder if she's told Octavia? No, I doubt it, or Clarke would have likely gone to her. I've heard from Lincoln that the girl complains often enough about Clarke's secrets, so yeah, definitely not her. Raven could know, but she's in an exam. And probably not her...oh shit...
Anya felt her heart crack, all the breath in her body escaping her as she remembered Clarke's words from the other day. She and her mother don't speak anymore, Clarke told me that, and she looked so hurt before voicing that much. Does her mother know about this? Clarke's a good kid, there's no reason for them to be so deeply estranged, unless...unless her mom knows. And if she hasn't interfered, or stopped her, then... did she leave Clarke to deal with this alone? Or worse?
She felt her grip tighten around the blonde as she pressed another kiss to Clarke's crown. "Of course I do. Of course I do." The words escaped her in blind syllables, just needing to release some of her tension, allowing herself to release the worry she held for her friend for the moment, knowing Clarke was safe in her arms, knowing that she'd keep her friend safe.
Clarke's wet laugh only spurred her on, wanting the emotional girl to know that if nothing else, if all else failed, Anya would have her back. "Clarke...you can always come to me like this. I'll be here for you...no matter the issue, no matter what you do for a living, I'm not going anywhere."
Anya felt Clarke's face press harder against her skin as her friend nodded, a hitched breath and sniffling preceding the moisture she felt seconds later. All of that was answer enough that her message had been received loud and clear, but the blonde's tears, the hardly stifled crying, the slightly shaking body clinging to her, all told Anya that whatever relief or comfort Clarke felt was mixed with hurt. A hurt that Anya wished she could heal on her own that very second, but she knew would require patience and commitment instead. If her worries of Clarke having dealt with this on her own were true, then she'd make sure her friend had all the support she could offer, and would hope it'd be enough to have Clarke feeling more secure and safe.
Knowing Clarke was pretty overwhelmed at the moment, and knowing she was definitely getting there as well with her own maelstrom of emotions over the blonde, she decided to take some initiative. "Hey, so I woke far earlier than I usually do, and I was thinking of having a nap to get refreshed in time for my date. Will you stay?"
Clarke nodding against her again prompted Anya to shift in bed, bringing them both down slightly to where her friend's head was resting against her neck as well as on the pillow, Anya using her second, less-full pillow to supplement the support of her own. A hand ran through Clarke's hair as the blonde's well of emotions finally ran dry, as the girl's energy levels sank her into slumber; only when she was a hundred percent certain Clarke was deep into her sleep did Anya pick her novel back up.
It only took three pages until she set it back down again, absolutely not in the right headspace to dive into her novel's world when her friend was so troubled. Anya flitted through a mental list of the people she knew, assessing the character and capabilities of each one for potential to help with this newest conflict. Not that Clarke had asked for help, not that Clarke probably even needed it, but she wanted to have the resources ready and available in case Clarke did.
Anya was considering the past shady dealings of an acquaintance of hers when the door to the dorm opened and Lexa strolled in, probably fresh from helping Echo study for her section of the course Lexa had finished up with a few days ago. Her cousin's stride slowed to a halt midway through the room, Lexa's eyes narrowing as those green eyes took in her and Clarke's position on the bed.
"Am I interrupting something?" Lexa asked with an oddly hostile tone, arms crossing and stance widening. It was almost cute how jealous she could get over the blonde, sometimes.
"No, Clarke will likely be drooling on my shoulder for a while yet." She answered with a smile she was sure would feed a little of that fire inside of Lexa. Not that she wanted her little one to get upset, but getting her cousin to eventually admit some feelings for Clarke would be a good step, at least towards them talking about it and helping Lexa deal with them together. And if it took some focus away from Clarke and the blonde's current state, then all the better.
Lexa just grimaced at the detail of Clarke's sleep hygiene, but refused to back down, at least if the girl's clenched jaw was any indication. "And she couldn't find anyone else to drool on? Don't you have a date with Raven, soon?"
"Of course I do, it's..." Anya started, before glancing at her watch. "In about two hours. Of course, you could take over for me if you're in the mood for a nap, or just want to get under her." Anya finished, barely stifling a laugh at how deeply red Lexa's cheeks went at her words.
"I'mgonnagrabdinner." Lexa rushed out, spinning on her heel and hastily escaping the dorm room, leaving Anya and Clarke alone once more. One day, Anya was sure that teasing Lexa would cease to amuse her. Today was not that day.
Still, it did have her mind drifting towards her cousin's feelings for the blonde currently sleeping atop her. Lexa's been so prone to putting Clarke in boxes to distance herself from what she's been feeling, to find an excuse to keep from moving on with her life. If she...if she found out Clarke was a sex worker, like I think she is...would that end up being another excuse for Lexa to shut her out? I'd like to believe Lexa's not so shallow and judgmental, but...she's also scared, and scared people do bad things sometimes if they think it will protect them. Is that why Clarke hasn't made a move on Lexa? Because she wasn't sure Lexa could handle that part of her life?
It was all a bit depressing. Anya peered down at Clarke and ran a hand through the girl's hair, smiling at how the blonde immediately curled in a little closer from the touch. She deserves love and happiness as much as anyone. Her patience, her courage, her heart...they still have me feeling she could be good for Lexa. She could help Lexa get past Costia in ways I never could...she could make Lexa happy. And I know my little one could make Clarke so happy, and feel so special...
Anya sighed at her own impatience, wishing that she could snap her fingers and get the two to sit down and work things out. The walk together had clearly been a good start, but she knew if they could just sit down and really talk, so much could be gained.
It was a bit of a pipe dream, though, especially it happening any time soon. With the holidays upon them, and Lexa's birthday soon after that, and then New Years' after that, there weren't many opportunities to get her friend and her cousin alone in the same place.
Not that she'd stop trying. Not with another name added to the very brief list of people whose happiness she'd fight for. She'd just have to wait and be patient; with her luck as it was lately, perhaps the two would just stumble into one sooner rather than later.
Anya could only hope.
Lexa walked at a brisk pace back towards her dorm from the diner a few blocks away, carrying a full stomach and the knowledge that Anya had likely been picked up by Raven for their date a few minutes ago. Not that she was avoiding Anya in particular, just her cousin's love of teasing her about the blonde; Clarke waking up to Anya taunting her would have been mortifying, so she had left the dorm and kept such a horrible scenario from playing out.
She had also been far too hungry and overcome by the delicious food she'd ordered to check or answer the series of texts she was sure Anya had sent over the past while, judging by the buzzing of her phone Still, it was easier to ignore her cousin and her obligations when Anya wasn't around to hassle her for it. As she ventured home, she pulled her phone from her pocket to see what she'd missed.
5:10PM
Anya
Lexa, I'm getting ready for my date with Raven and I would appreciate it if you could return soon. Clarke is still sleeping and I'd prefer she not wake up alone and get confused because no one's there. Thank you
5:32PM
Anya
I'm borrowing that necklace of yours btw. That ambery brown tourmaline one. I'll keep it safe
5:45PM
Anya
You're not here, so I assume you won't be. I've called Octavia to come over and get Clarke, or keep her company. I don't want her waking up alone. In the off chance she texts you and can't get into the dorm, let her know my key card is hidden under the rock beside the flower pot.
6:04PM
Octavia
hey lexa r u home can u let me in
Lexa couldn't help but feel a little bad at her evasiveness bringing Anya to call on Octavia, especially since Lincoln's girlfriend apparently did show up. Still, she just wasn't ready to handle Anya aggressively teasing her, and she wasn't ready to sit by and relax while Anya and Clarke were all snuggled up together like lovers, barely a few feet away.
Knowing Anya left Clarke in bed, and was worrying about Clarke waking up alone, all while going out on a date with Raven? It honestly boggled Lexa's mind. She had felt quite certain that her cousin was into Raven, not Clarke, and yet, she'd certainly caught the two in a compromising position. Why else would Anya worry about Clarke waking alone?
They have been getting closer...they've napped together before today, though they'd never been tangled in each other's limbs, and Clarke had NEVER fallen asleep on top of Anya. I don't understand...Raven is Clarke's friend, why would she do this to her on the day of their date? Raven asked Anya out, Anya accepted, and Clarke sang to ME, so...why? Lexa wondered, wracking her brain as she made her way down the road towards her dorm, Octavia visible off in the distance. There has to be an explanation. I'm not going to let Clarke confuse things for Anya...but I won't be able to do that if I can't get to Clarke.
Lexa continued her march down the street, eventually waving to catch Octavia's attention, a relieved smile spreading across the short girl's face. "Hey, Lexa! I thought you were inside, Anya asked me to stop by."
"I just saw your text, and she told me to tell you the keycard was hidden under the rock..." Lexa noted as she gestured to the rock in question before grabbing Anya's card. "But I figured since I was a few seconds away, I'd just talk to you myself. Why did she send you by, anyways?"
Octavia's hesitant shrug, the hint of worry and frustration at the edge of the girl's eyes, it all told her that Clarke's roommate knew something was up. "She asked if I'd come by to bring Clarke home or keep her company, maybe cheer her up. Said Clarke fell asleep on her, though, which...well, we don't need to get into. I was just out, waiting to pick up an order I made earlier today, so the least I could do was come over. Clarke's my friend, you know?"
Lexa just nodded along, even if her concerns had her wanting to needle the girl for information. "Clarke is often tired when she comes over, it's rarely an issue. Did something happen to Clarke lately for her to need someone around?" She asked, hoping her questions could earn some answers to smooth out her confusion and concern.
Thankfully, her words instigated enough of Octavia's concern for Clarke, and seemed to loosen the girl's tongue. "I...fuck, I don't know. It sounds shitty, but I really haven't been around much, and I know she's been over here a lot lately, so...I just don't really know. Like, I dragged her old guitar over here in Lincoln's car in case she just needed a little cheering up, but...why would I get called here if Clarke was just sleeping? She and you guys are friends, it's not like you're worried she's gonna steal anything. Maybe something did happen..."
Lexa saw no end to Octavia's worries spiraling out and decided to step in as she peered up at her dorm room's window. "That's very thoughtful of you, I'm sure she'd appreciate it. By the look of it, she's probably still sleeping, with how dark my room is, so if you need time to pick up your order, you have it. I could give you Anya's card, head up, and watch over her until you get back. I'm sure you won't be long, and if Clarke's sleeping, she'll probably stay that way for a while yet."
Octavia jaw set, brow furrowed in concentration as she took in her offer. "It's Lincoln's Christmas gift, and they can only hold it until the shop closes. Which is, like, really soon...I feel bad, but you sure you wouldn't mind? I'll probably only be fifteen minutes, they were checking around back to get everything together when Anya called."
Lexa felt relief wash through her at the opportunity that presented itself. "I'll take good care of her, you just go get Lincoln's things. Why don't I take the guitar up as well, in case she wakes?"
"Yeah, absolutely. Thanks, Lexa, like I said, I'll be back before you know it." Octavia answered, taking Anya's key card from her, offering a brief wave before rushing off to Lincoln's car.
Knowing her time alone with Clarke was limited, Lexa took hold of the guitar case and entered Light Hall, hauling the black leather case up the stairs and down the hall to her dorm. There wasn't any light underneath the door, so she carefully turned the knob and slowly pushed the door open.
The room was pitch black aside from the ambient glow of the street lights filtering in from outside and providing Lexa enough to quietly sneak across the room and turn her desk lamp on. Her gaze turned to Anya's bed, where her cousin had left Clarke, apparently having covered the blonde with a pair of blankets for warmth. Anya was nice like that. The blonde's eyes were shut, and her slow, even breathing signaled that the girl was fast asleep.
Lexa gently sat down on her bed and rested the guitar case on her lap as she considered how to handle the situation. Would she be direct, demanding Clarke explain why she was trying to get between Anya and Raven? Would she try to use what warmth and friendliness she'd fostered with the blonde to coax out the girl's thoughts on Anya? Would she hold a calm tone or a fierce one, knowing differing emotions could prompt different responses? Would she remain seated, or would she stand and use minor visual cues to prompt a higher probability of a submissive response? There's so much to consider, and such little time. I just want to know that Anya isn't being toyed with, eve if she's old enough to make her own decisions. I just don't want to see her get hurt, and if for some reason Anya...if she...for whatever reason, if she wants CLARKE more than Raven, if they end up getting INTIMATE, then I guess, well...I suppose...
"You can open it, you know. Instead of just playing with the seals." A groggy, raspy voice mumbled out, drawing Lexa's attention first to the blonde on Anya's bed, squinting blue eyes watching her curiously. Lexa's gaze then fell to her hands, which apparently unknowingly had been opening and closing the lid for the guitar case while deep in thought, if the newly loose seals were any indication.
Feeling a surge of embarrassment for once again being caught off guard by the blonde, Lexa shoved the case onto her pillow and straightened her posture. Green eyes watched with interest as Clarke sat up and grabbed a stray hoodie at the end of Anya's bed, the blonde swiftly pulling it over her head. "What time is it?"
"Twenty after six." Lexa answer shortly, though Clarke didn't seem affected by her tone at all, just tiredly sinking down at the edge of Anya's bed, directly across from Lexa.
"Ah, yeah. Definitely out on their date then." Clarke noted before yawning loudly, a hand thankfully covering the tired girl's mouth. "Pretty sure Anya's gonna love it. Raven definitely brought her A game with the plan for tonight." The blonde continued, a goofy smile curling her lips upward.
It all had Lexa confused, because why would Clarke want the date to go well if she was interested in Anya? It didn't make sense. "You're not the least bit jealous?" She asked, perhaps giving away her agenda for the sake of hopefully getting a quick, clear answer.
Tired blue eyes squinted with confusion at Lexa for a moment or two, but that uncertainty quickly smoothed out as Clarke's gaze was taken over by a calm focus. "Maybe of what they were getting up to tonight." The blonde noted carefully, watchful eyes peering deep into her with clear curiosity, as if Lexa was a puzzle ready to be solved. "But you thought differently."
Lexa gulped back her annoyance at Clarke quickly having prepared for such a confrontation, that sleepy daze whisked away in a second after the wrong word. It was annoying. "Could you blame me, when I walked in on you and Anya curled up together? On the day of her date?" She asked, deciding to be direct, knowing there wasn't any real tactical advantage left anymore. At least, none that Clarke wouldn't counter or see through.
"Lexa, Anya is a wonderful woman." Clarke stated slowly, a sweet lighthearted air to the last few syllables. It may have soothed a tiny bit of her worry over Clarke's intentions. Just a little. "But she's a friend to me. A friend that I just needed to have today."
Lexa's lips twisted in annoyance at how vague Clarke was being with her reassurances. "And how exactly did you need to have her, Clarke?"
Perhaps Clarke's long, heavy sigh was predictable, but the blonde's low laugh following it certainly wasn't. "Look, you don't want to believe me, that's fine. Maybe fair, even, after what you thought you saw. You're clearly concerned for your cousin, and I get that. It's actually really relieving that you're proving me right about something Anya and I talked about the other day." Clarke spoke, speaking a lot of words but not saying much of anything that made sense or was relevant to the situation at hand. "I needed Anya today for a bunch of reasons, none of which were sexual at all. She's beautiful, but I don't see her that way."
Lexa digested Clarke's statements, gauging the sincerity in the blonde's eyes and seeing no reason to doubt their truth. It was a little relieving, but left Lexa mostly perplexed. "And you needed to sleep on top of Anya, why?" None of it made sense. Anya was intimate with lovers, with family. Her cousin had always, always held that strict divide, and with Clarke not being family, that left one possibility. Or, at least, only one that made a lick of sense.
Clarke scoffed as she moved to her feet and crossed the room, Lexa's body rippling with nerves as the blonde sat down beside her, hands clasped in front. "Lexa, look, I'm friends with Anya now, and I'd really like to find our way towards friendship, too, so I'll tell you the truth."
Lexa was a little surprised at the offer, especially with Clarke taking a spot at her side to do so. Is she going to lie to me? Is that why she's avoiding eye contact? Or...is...well, she does look particularly nervous. She's doing that thing with her right heel again... Lexa mused, watching the girl's right heel sway side to side, something of a nervous tick she'd noticed from her time around the blonde.
"I had a bad day. I was overtired and work got a hold of me on my phone and...look, the long and short of it was I was upset and needed Anya as a sounding board. I came around, and got nervous, because I hate talking about work, I actively avoid it, but I needed some support, and she was there for me. She helped, I vented until I was exhausted, and I guess I must have fallen asleep. We were sitting together, her back was to the pillow since she'd been reading when I came in, so I guess maybe I fell asleep on her, and she just reclined us back." Clarke explained, perhaps not in as much detail as Lexa would have liked, but it certainly painted an odd picture in her mind. "Anya's a great friend. You're lucky to have her as family."
She nodded along at that clear and obvious fact, because of course Anya was great. Lexa's mental processes were more concerned with an image of Clarke being upset enough to go to Anya for comfort and exhaust herself in venting about her troubles. From her perspective, Clarke was consistently unflappable; perhaps the girl could be silly and clumsy at times, but she'd never witnessed Clarke be emotionally vulnerable outside of that one musical performance weeks and weeks ago.
As difficult as it was to imagine, though, it made sense, even if it was something of a first. Anya letting Clarke nap on her like that, Anya being protective of Clarke and requesting she or Octavia watch over her, Clarke being hesitant to provide details on why she and Anya had been wrapped up like that. From personal history, she knew Anya wasn't a fan of discussing such instances, which was good, because she'd found herself in Anya's arms like that plenty of times. Is that how Anya sees Clarke? Is that how Clarke sees Anya? She considered, knowing there was no way that Anya thought of Clarke as pure family, but she also knew that Anya rarely offered that level of security and care to anyone, and basically never anyone outside of her family that wasn't a lover. It was definitely new territory, and left Lexa with some burning questions, but nothing that gave cause for concern. Anya's...finally made a close friend?
"I am." She noted in response to the blonde's words, before lightly patting the guitar case. "Octavia was here to see you, but you were sleeping. She left to finish an errand nearby, but she should be back soon. In the meantime, she thought your guitar could cheer you up."
Lexa pulled the guitar case across her lap and handed it to Clarke, who popped the final seals open with a smile and pulled out a guitar Lexa hadn't seen before. It was different than the one from the party, much older and weathered, taking on a shape similar to an upright stringed instrument in a way.
"This was my dad's. It's been handed down through the family for generations, all the way back to my great grandfather. I'm pretty sure he stole it, actually, and my grandfather used it as decoration more than he played it, but my dad...my dad loved it from the first time he set eyes on it. He took such good care of it." Clarke noted absently as pale hands smoothed over the surface of the instrument. Lexa's chest grew tight hearing about its origins, recalling her own mother's small collection of instruments, recalling promises that they'd be hers one day. Knowing that she didn't even know where any of them were anymore, and yet here was Clarke, still holding on to a family heirloom that her father had graciously handed down. "Do you play?"
Lexa shook her head, fighting instinct, knowing what she did know and could do wasn't enough to say she could. Not when her mom hadn't finished teaching her. "No, just a chord or two." She answered, memory hopping to a fond memory of her mother's goofy little educational songs meant to teach her music theory, even if they weren't very effective. Too often, her mom would slip into a giggle fit at her own songs and then have to start over. Teeth bit into tender cheek as fought back the yearning bubbling up through her insides and up her throat, pressure squeezing at her heart. Her mom had always been so happy.
Clarke set the case aside and took the guitar into her arms, gently picking at the strings and reacquainting herself with it. "My dad took a lot of pride in this beast. He was always on the lookout for anyone else who played one, or something similar...he grew up in Georgia, and was a country boy at heart, and played the hell out of a lot of older country stuff, folk, bluegrass, that whole scene. Can't help but love a lot of that stuff, myself, with how much he loved sharing it with me."
Lexa wasn't sure why Clarke was opening up to her of all people, especially about a guitar, but she wasn't about to stop the blonde now. Not with such a warm, wonderful smile on the girl's face. It wasn't wrong to enjoy seeing someone happy, after all.
"My dad was kind of like Raven in some ways...he tinkered, and had a knack for being able to pick up on things, learn them really quickly. Whether it was fixing cars, playing guitar, skating and hockey, fireman training, or the whole range of his engineering work, things just...came to him. He was a natural, and...well, I was a clumsy little kid. I chalk my ability to play up to my father's patience, and inheriting my mother's stubbornness." Clarke continued, fingers picking idly at some song that immediately had Lexa rapt in attention at its odd intro, intricate melody, and how the blonde just seemed to breeze though the nuanced performance. "I can't play a lot of complex stuff aside from a few songs my dad and I used to run through as daily practice, but I'm okay at improvising."
"Like the Taylor Swift songs at Octavia's party." She found herself blurting out before the words even registered in her mind. Still, Clarke just widened her smile and nodded.
"Exactly. Don't get me wrong, she's alright, I just don't know how to play any of her songs in specific. I've only heard them, and I can usually feel out a performance and make it work." Clarke added, voice trailing off into a quiet hum as her fingers picked away with precision.
"Do you plan to get any better? Learn any new music?" She asked, wondering if maybe Clarke would one day consider learning a Taylor Swift song. Lexa, of course, had a number of selections she thought could be good choices for getting back in the proverbial saddle.
Clarke's shoulder lifted into a shrug, the blonde offering a noncommittal hum in place of an answer until her hands had finished up a particularly intricate little solo. "Maybe one day I'll feel inspired. For now, it's enough to keep it as a relaxing hobby, and to help jog my memory."
That much, Lexa could understand. If she had a guitar, perhaps it could help remember her mother a little better, or at least keep certain memories from slipping away. It was just a little painful to think about reconnecting like that after so long, after abandoning her mother's things because it had been too much to deal with when she was younger. Back then, it had been hard enough not to smash the instruments in anger at them being what her mother left behind, when she would have traded everything she had to get her parents back.
"My mother used to play guitar." Lexa murmured, immediately catching Clarke's attention and stilling the girl's hands, casting the room in silence, a not so subtle gesture for her to continue, she supposed. "Simple songs, mostly. She was a fan of The Carpenters, The Beach Boys, and while she was never wildly skilled, she...she was wonderful to listen to. Her voice was beautiful. "
Lexa smiled at the relief she felt from vocalizing that part of her past; while she still felt her insides squeezed from the pain of her loss, she could still manage a smile at the memory of her mother's airy, infectious laugh. That was a feat in itself.
"She was such a bad teacher, even if she was so patient with me. What little I learned from her, I learned watching her hands and trying to remember their placement when I tried my hand at it." Lexa continued with a shake of her head, recalling how her mom would be endlessly patient with her, and would be so confident in her despite how Lexa so often came out of the lessons having learned nothing. "How did your father teach you?"
Clarke's laugh bubbled up and shook its way out of the blonde, only getting hard as the girl worked at containing it instead of carrying on. "He, uh...trial by fire is probably the best description. I'd always want to play with him, but if I couldn't keep up, I'd have to play rhythm. Which, in hindsight, was a good way to burn the fundamentals into my skull, but he'd always tease me so much, so I'd just hole myself up in my room and practice. If I wasn't at school, eating, playing hockey, or asleep, I was probably playing guitar." Clarke explained, fingers shifting to play a new song, one a little lighter than the last. "This was his favourite. When it was first released, he was so excited, and learned it all in less than a week. I ground away at it until I had it down, and then it kind of got to be a regular whenever we'd play together."
Lexa listened as Clarke's fingers plucked and swept along the strings, looping back to the melody she heard the song start off with, the blonde mumbling along to the song as she apparently went through it. Now, Lexa wasn't a pushy person, she gave people their space, and clearly that song was very near and dear to Clarke, but it did seem a little odd to perform a song clearly with one's hands and not with one's voice. So maybe she gently shoulder-nudged the blonde.
And maybe a laugh blurted out of Clarke, curious blue eyes meeting her own as Clarke's mumbling became clearer. "...school when I was nine, and the sisters said I did just as I pleased." Clarke sang quietly as their eyes held contact, the blonde's fingers picking away at a brief solo. "Even so, I try to be a good girl. It's only what I want that makes me weak...I had no desire to be a child of sin, then you went and pressed your sweet lips to my cheek."
Lexa felt her face bloom with warmth at the last bit there, but she felt fairly confident that it was dark enough in the room to obscure it, letting her mind wander towards the topic of sinning, soft lips, and good girls for a few enticing moments.
Perhaps a few moments too long, because before she knew it, the music was stopping, and Clarke's hands had stilled along the body of the guitar. "Sorry about that, I just have the habit of tuning out the world when I play that song sometimes."
Lexa resisted breathing a sigh of relief at Clarke not calling her out on her gaffe, or perhaps not even catching it. "It's fine, Clarke. You're quite talented."
Which, to Lexa's horror and fortune, had Clarke's cheeks clearly blushing a deep red, ensuring that the blonde likely had witnessed her own embarrassing reaction mere seconds ago. "I could teach you sometime...you know, if you wanted to learn, that is."
"Oh! Um..." Lexa stumbled out, the sound of her phone beeping about a new text providing her with a reprieve from answering that question, at least for the moment. Because, really, she very much wanted to learn. She had a feeling that Clarke's agile fingers could teach her a great many things. That prospect was also more than a little too terrifying to handle at the moment; such decisions weren't supposed to be made in haste. Quickly, Lexa checked her phone and opened her newest message, Octavia's icon greeting her. "Octavia's here, she's just finding a place to park."
Clarke's expression drooped a little at the news, though Lexa couldn't say with complete certainty that it was from disappointment. "She'll probably want to head back to the dorm and hang out. I know Raven will want to stop by and see me later, too, to gush about her date, so I guess I should probably head out. I know Anya will at least have you to help with that, but...you let her know I'll be all ears tomorrow morning, okay?"
Lexa allowed herself a nod as Clarke stood up and gathered a bag, scarf, and coat and bundled up for the cold weather. "In the meantime, can you keep my little beast safe? I mean, feel free to play with it if you want, she's hard to break. And...again, if you ever want to learn, you only have to ask."
The level of trust Clarke bestowed upon her, if just until Anya got home, was staggering. A family heirloom that the blonde clearly treasured, left under her watch. "Of course. Goodnight, Clarke."
"Goodnight, Lexa." Clarke offered with a small wave, one she matched, before slipping out the door, leaving Lexa alone in her dimly lit dorm room with an ancient guitar resting at her side.
Her hand ran along the edge of the guitar's body, knowing she had a few hours until Anya was set to return. Certainly long enough to maybe immerse herself in some old, dusty recollections of her mother, she figured, fingers trailing down the series of strings. Tonight, she'd let herself remember.
A/N: Songs courtesy of Gillian Welch. "Revelator" (the first song Clarke idly picks away at) and "Tennessee" (her father's favourite song, the one she sings a bit of).
This ran long, mostly because there really wasn't a good way to cut things down or split things up, and the next chapter really does need to be structured in a way that wouldn't do well with this chapter's final scene leading it off. And I wanted to do this scene before the date with Raven and Anya. So things just piled up, one paragraph led to another, and we ended up with a lot of material. :P
Anywho, thanks so much for taking the time to read! It warms my heart that so many of you have been enjoying the variety of relationships across this fic.
