Okay so the last chapter was fun to write. I'm not a big fan of Jacob so I don't know how much longer he'll be stuck in my story but as for Edward and Bella…let's continue with the aftermath.

SM Owns!

R&R

BPOV

The next week was a blur. I had double shifts at the small bookstore and midterms to study for on top of that. And Edward called…everyday. His voicemails were often long but after awhile I stopped listening to them. Mostly because, despite the week that had passed, I was the furthest from numb. Any thought that lingered towards his direction sent my stomach back on its never-ending rollercoaster.

Alice refused to talk to me about it until I spoke to Edward himself. She kept insisting that if I had done that in the first place, I might have skipped over this part. I knew she was right but hearing Edward actually say he didn't want me was something I'd rather skip over.

So I was left harboring the broken pieces alone as usual.

"Bella can you pull these three books from the stock room please" begged my boss, Nancy, pulling me from my thoughts.

"Yeah sure" I said, stepping from behind the café counter. As I walked into the back storage room, my phone vibrated. I winced as Jacob's name highlighted the screen. I hadn't really talked to him since the party and felt extremely guilty for the way things had ended that night. I'm sure he didn't expect his night would consist of comforting his hysterical date that he probably thought was some deranged psycho who couldn't control her alcohol intake.

"Hello?"

"Hey Bella!" His voice was chirpier than necessary as if he was surprised I answered.

"Hey Jacob, about last week…" I started.

"Forget about it." He said quickly, cutting me off. "We don't have to talk about it if you don't want to."

"Okay," I said rather easily. Although I felt bad about the situation, I definitely did not want to talk about it. "I'm sorry though."

"You don't need to apologize." He said warmly. "But I do think that you owe me a second date."

"Um…" I said hesitantly. As much as I enjoyed his company at the party-well the part before my breakdown- I wasn't interested in him in that way. He was sweet and charming but better suited as just a friend.

"Jacob, I'm not really looking to "date" anyone right now." It was the truth. I was done dating the day I met Edward. I had found my soul mate even if the feelings weren't entirely reciprocated. There was no point in looking for anyone else. All they would ever be was a placement holder.

"Okay, don't look at it as a date then." He quickly amended, "Look at it as a guy asking his beautiful friend to hang out."

"Beautiful friend?" I giggled. It was the first time I'd heard myself laugh all week. It felt weird.

"Yah, what do you say? I'm thinking tomorrow around 3:00."

"Okay?" I replied after a long pause. In a way he reminded me of Alice. Instead of negotiating, I just conceded.

"Great" he said, again with a little more excitement then I think he intended.

"I'll see you then,"

"Oh and Bella" he said before I could hang up, "Wear tennis shoes. We'll be outdoors and I don't think I can spend the whole day catching you."

"Bye Jacob" I said playfully, snapping the phone shut.

Maybe I wouldn't die from this depression after all.

I shaded my eyes from the unusual heat as I opened the door to find Jacob leaning nonchalantly on the railing.

"Ready to go?" he asked, flashing me one of his wide smiles.

"Do I look okay?" I asked hesitantly. When Jacob had requested I'd wear tennis shoes, I wasn't really sure that still entailed a detailed outfit despite Alice's opinion. I shrugged as I glanced down at my white t-shirt and short khakis.

"Yah, you look fine" he replied, giving me a wink.

As he pushed his weight to his right foot I noticed he dangled a baseball bat in his hands.

"Baseball?" I asked pointing to his hand. My coordination skills weren't the best but after Edward had insisted on having a best friend who knew how to play the game he loved, baseball was the one thing I could do successfully. After the many practices I was dragged to, I had actually managed to become pretty good at it. I had even managed to beat Emmett in a scrimmage that he'd rather not talk about…ever. I chuckled as I remembered his face as I skid into home plate and I sighed as I remembered Edward's proud expression as he declared me safe.

"Yep, there's a batting cage on Wilson's Road I wanted to try out." Jacob exclaimed, pulling me out of my thoughts.

"I know what you're talking about" I said as we walked towards his black Jetta. Grabbing my seatbelt, I thought back to the countless times Edward had taken me there during the summer. As much as I hated sports, we'd always had fun. And as I heard the click of the belt, I couldn't help but to think of how much I truly missed him. Despite the lust that was now driving me away, I missed my best friend. A lot.

The car ride was slower than I remembered. Edward and Alice were both terrible drivers who had no regard for speed limits and so I was surprised by the comfortableness I felt in Jacob's car. It was nice to enjoy the scenery without carsickness pulling at your stomach.

"Okay I have to warn you," I teased as I looked up to Jacob who was handing me my own glove and bat. "I have a pretty mean arm".

I smiled lightly as I noticed that he had given me right-handed glove. I placed it awkwardly onto my fingers.

"Oh is that so" he chuckled as he carefully placed a helmet over my head.

"Yes, I just don't want you to have any mental breakdowns while were in there."

"Thanks for the look out." He said rolling his eyes.

"What are friends for?" I said giving him a wink.

His lips edged towards a smile as we silently walked into the building. The air conditioning felt great on my skin and I couldn't help but to get excited. That is until I saw who was in the first batting cage.

Arms stretched wide, Edward smashed his bat into an oncoming ball. His legs receded and his biceps flexed as he mounted up for the next one. After hitting that one, his body suddenly relaxed and I immediately turned around as I realized he was stretching his neck, his head snapping towards my direction.

Before I could follow Jacob any further into the next cage, I heard him call my name.

"Bella?" Edward said slowly.

I turned around to see his bat clash into the asphalt. And then I just stood there, letting the pain drown me.

"Bella" he said again, walking towards me.

Before I could think, his arms were wrapped around my waist and my head fell into his chest. My body intertwined with his and it felt good. I sunk into every crevice of muscle and fold of his skin. And as naturally as it had always been, I fit.

He pulled me away slowly but not before I had a chance to remove the traitorous tears that were beginning to swell. Still holding me he grazed my cheekbone with his thumb. And at that point I didn't care. I didn't care that the way he looked at me, as convincing as it was, contained no desire. I didn't care that he didn't want me. I was just so happy to be in his arms that everything flew out the window. And as much pain I knew I would feel when he let me go, nothing seemed to feel as right as it did at that moment. I was where I belonged even if life was too unfair to acknowledge it. I knew it and that's all that mattered. Just being with him made me feel as whole as I knew I would ever feel. And even though I knew I was putting all my eggs in one faulty basket as I threw every emotion into him, I still didn't care. I would watch them fall one by one as I always did, with as much content as my body would allow.

Finally releasing me, he looked into my eyes and asked the one question that I never imagined he would.

"Do you hate me?"

His eyes bored into mine and I couldn't help the bubble of a sob that escaped my lips.

"I could never hate you Edward." I whispered, glancing towards the floor. It was the truth.

"Then why are you avoiding me?" he pleaded, grabbing my hand and redirecting my attention. "I miss you so much Bella."

I didn't say anything. There were really no words. Especially since the only thing that came to mind was him kissing Tanya.

"Bella, talk to me. I need you." he said, taking my hand and placing it on his cheek.

I looked into his eyes and watched his expression curl back into the pained look from the hospital. My heart sped.

"I miss you too Edward, its just…" I started.

"It's just what?" he frowned. His body was tense and I could feel the anxiety leaking at his fingertips.

"I…."

"You said you wanted to move pass this." He said, frustration emerging in his voice.

"You said you didn't want us to fall apart."

"I don't " I whispered back.

"Then why are you doing this. You're not even trying" his voice was hard now as he cupped my face in his hands.

Before I could answer Jacob stepped forward.

"Are you okay Bella". He asked. His voice was also hard as he and Edward exchanged death looks.

"Yeah, Jacob just give me a minute". I said through tears.

He gave me one last look before hesitantly retreating into the batting cage. He shook his head from side to side and sighed.

"Who is that?" Edward spat, his gaze following Jacob.

"He's a friend. Alice introduced us a couple of days ago."

He returned his eyes to mine and frowned. "Is he the reason why you've been avoiding me?"

"What…no Edward" I said, shaking my head, "Jacob is just a friend. I barely know him". He looked mad and I didn't understand why.

"Do you want me as a friend?" he said tilting his head towards the side.

"Edward you know that's what I want. You're my best-"

"Then why are you pushing me aside like I'm nothing." His voice cracked with pain, eagerly replacing his anger

"Edward" I sighed, reaching up to caress his cheek.

He pulled me closer and my breathing hitched.

"I need you Bella." He whispered into my ear. "Like air. Please…I'll do anything just don't give up on us."

"I'm not giving up…I just…"

"What. What is it then?" he whispered, "I'll fix it. Just tell me what I need to do and I'll fix it."

"You can't fix this Edward" I cried, pulling away from him. My tears were full force now and he looked scared. "I mean we'll get back to normal" I spat, "but you can't fix this. This is the one thing that isn't fixable."

I wiped away more falling tears and looked at him. He couldn't "fix" the way I regarded him. I would always love him. And as I stood there, face to face with him I didn't want him to fix it. I wanted to love him. I wanted him to fix the fact that he couldn't love me back. I wasn't ashamed and at that moment I wasn't remorseful. In many ways my love for him was one of the most redeeming qualities that I possessed. In no way did I want that "fixed".

"What are you talking about Bella?" He said slowly, advancing towards me once again.

"There's just some things that you can't change." I whispered.

"I'll change for you Bella. I'll do anything, you know that."

I looked at him for what seemed like forever. I honestly wanted to believe him. I honestly wanted to believe that if I finally told him, he would love me back. No questions asked. Something would click and he would just simply love me back.

"You can't change for me Edward."

"Then what do you want me to do!" He was beyond pissed and I couldn't blame him. I wasn't making sense and I was sure I was making everything worse.

"Are you going to answer the next time I call?" he was yelling now as he gripped the sides of my face again,

"Or are we going to keep playing this game? Are you going to be there when I need you? Are you going to let me be there for you when you need me? Or are you going to let some random ass guy take you to our batting cages despite the fact that he cant even manage to give you the right glove." He said as he yanked my right gloved arm that was useless. I was clearly left handed.

"Edward of course I'm going to be here… I just"

"You know what Bella," he said looking into my eyes.

"You do what's best for you. I'll be fine."

And with that he kissed my forehead and was gone.