THE COB BOOK: PART TWO

"And of course THAT was when the Hunter's paintballs ran out!" Owen declared throwing his hands up in exasperation while Ezekiel nodded his head. "So would you do it again eh?" Owen didn't answer so he tried again. "You knoo the paintball. Would you want to play that again eh?"

Ezekiel's faint smile faded immediately as he realized the large teen was ignoring him. Before the familiar pains of rejection once again set in, Owen reacted. "Oh Heavenly Siren! I hear and obey!"

The prairie boy stared at Owen in confusion particularly when the bigger male walked out of the bedroom in a daze. Curiously he followed his guest out of the bedroom and down to the dining room where his mother was placing several covered bowls on the table with Izzy's help.

"Good. I was joost gonna call you for dinner eh." Ezekiel's mom commented cheerfully snapping Owen out of his daze and he gasped. "Wow! You talk just like Ezekiel does!" Ezekiel and his mother chuckled. "She's my mom eh. I get the accent from her."

"Oh." Inwardly berating himself for the stupid question, Owen quickly tried to focus on something else. His gaze landing on his girlfriend who had the red fox draped over one shoulder. Izzy grinned.

"Yeah Zeke takes after his mom on a lot of things. They both can cook, they have brown hair and the same accent, but there are differences. Like he dove off the 1000 foot cliff, rode a shark and stuff like that and his mom has a prosthetic leg!"

"Prosthetic wha?" Ezekiel's mom sat down on one of the chairs with a calm smile and to Owen's horror removed the false leg revealing the bandaged stump underneath. Izzy grinned. "Isn't that sooo cool?!" Owen proceeded to scream bloody murder.

The door to the farmhouse opened and the happy go lucky teen ran outside into the snow with Ezekiel and Izzy running after him. Unaware he was being followed; Owen continued to scream as he passed by the many fruit trees on the property.

Most likely he would have continued running until he hit home or Wawanakwa, but the sight of the Traveling Cam nearby stopped him in his tracks. Eagerly he charged forward.


Traveling Cam

Hidden among the fruit trees

Owen-Great Snowman Carley Brownie and that big snow monster that chases the reindeer and the elf! Man that was nuts! I mean she took off her LEG! AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Owen finishes his scared cry and sighs in relief.

Owen-Man is I glad to get that off of my chest! Now I can concentrate on the fine art that is eating! (He charges out of the curtain.)

Static before Ezekiel peeks inside the curtain curiously.

Ezekiel-Owen? You in here eh?

The prairie boy steps inside the Traveling Cam and fully searches it in case the larger teen is hiding behind him. Ezekiel then sighed.

Ezekiel-First it was Izzy on the tree scaring me, then it was Owen scaring me, and then the snowball ride of doom and now Mom scared Owen. What's next eh?!

Ezekiel turns around to exit the curtain when he notices the camera in his face startling him.

Ezekiel-Where did that come from eh?!


Chris's House

5 minutes prior

Chris McClain had inwardly thanked himself for having the foresight of having the cameras placed in each of the camper's homes particularly Ezekiel's. Especially after seeing how Owen reacted to the Ezekiel's mom's false leg.

The joy continued as Owen found the newly relocated Traveling Cam and then the homeschooler wandered in by accident. "Hahaha! This is great! It almost makes up for our country boy ruining the million dollar briefcase hunt!"


Traveling Cam

Chris's House

Chef-Pretty boy's still steamed that his dramatic entrance was ruined before he got there thanks to Farm Boy leaving a few hours before the special challenge could be announced. The producers axed that the moment Loud Mouth mentioned the boy left. Which meant that Chubby kept the 100 g's, the interns did a lot of editing and that the campers were free to leave when they pleased.

Chris-Which was Boring! I mean come on! 22 campers fighting over a briefcase supposedly full of cash? I mean think of the possibilities! Somehow tractors, hot air balloons and bears come to mind. And sharks. Don't know why, but they do.

Static


Chris had just taken a swig of his soda pop just as a red fox tail appears moving across the television screen in slow motion before disappearing. The red fox tail then appears again traveling the other direction. A few seconds pass before without warning Izzy pops up in view of the camera growling in a feral manner her fingers curled like claws.

Izzy-RAWR!!!!!!!!!

The TDI host abruptly did a spit take much to Chef's great amusement. Chris scowled and wiped his mouth. "Not cool dude!"


Traveling Cam

Hidden among the fruit trees

Izzy is laughing in glee.

Izzy-I love doing that!

The crazy female looks around the new location with interest while cradling the fox in her hand.

Izzy-Woah hey! New confessional place! Awesome! So anyway Snakey is on vacation in the tropics. He hates snowy weather. So I wanted another animal friend in the winter to keep me company! So this is my new fox buddy! Yeah at first I was going to call him Foxy or Tails, but then I realized those names are sooo unoriginal!

Static before Izzy appears again.

Izzy-Oh hey! Almost forgot! Izzy is staying at Zeke's place! I mean how awesome is that?! And you should see all the cool stuff around here! And you know what's even cooler?! Seeing Zeke's mom up close. That picture he showed me back at the resort-


Izzy has goot good eyes eh. It's hard to see in the photo since my Mom is sitting down, boot she could tell there was something different aboot her. When I told her that my mom had a prosthetic leg she immediately checked booth my legs to see if they were real or noot.

Why does that not surprise me.

Gasp! His mom is a prosti-

Prosthetic Lindsay!!! It means she has a false leg!!!

Ohhhh…Why would she need a false leg for anyway?

Whispers.


Confessional Can

Gwen is almost entirely unrecognizable thanks to the vast amounts of barf covering her from almost head to toe.

Gwen-Lindsay drank a skunk smoothie, ate moldy worms, jellyfish pizza and so on and this is what causes her to almost lose her lunch. HEATHER telling Lindsay in detail about amputation CAUSED Lindsay to LOSE her lunch.

Heather is sitting on a fluffy towel to avoid getting vomit on her clothing. She is also smiling.

Heather-I got to say…I actually like Goth girl's new look. Both she and the CIT really bring new life to the…splattered with vomit look. (claps)

Static before a very furious Courtney appears on the screen similarly unrecognizable. Unfortunately she was sitting right next to Gwen during the upchucking onslaught.

Courtney-Ooooh…I have had with this reunion! I'm going to run for office one of theses days and not only do I have to worry about that picture of me being DRAGGED to the dock thanks to HAROLD voting me off, I NOW have to worry about the one with me being COVERED in BARF thanks to the clueless blonde's weak stomach! LINDSAY!!!!!

A few minutes pass before Lindsay appears on the screen with a more then a little sheepish smile on her face.

Lindsay-Wow…she was reallly mad. And I mean reallly. It's sooo not like I did that on purpose. It was when Heather said what happens when you….and the…

The camera catches a brief glimpse of Lindsay throwing up before the screen is covered with the mess.


Back inside the house Geoff holds open the bathroom door open kindly before it's slammed shut by the irate goth. Courtney at the other end of the house is similarly not amused as Tyler courteously did the same for her.

Unlike Geoff, the jock didn't let go of the door in time and some of his fingers got caught in the door frame. As Tyler yelled out in pain the door opened briefly freeing the trapped fingers. Courtney wrapped in a white towel shoved the yelling jock away from the door before it slammed shut once again.


Confessional Can

Tyler is holding a pack of ice over his injured hand and is wincing slightly from both the cold and the pain.

Tyler-Now that I think about it holding the door open for one of the puke covered girls was really bad. Especially since I'm dating the girl who puked on them in the first place.

The jock winced as he tried to flex his fingers.

Tyler-At least I'm not the newest member of the cast club.


"Not that this hasn't been entertaining…but I still have the train to catch. The others will just have to catch up." That said Noah buried himself back into the COB book, letting a bemused smile appear on his covered face.


So today she wanted to play something called volley the ball.

Snickers and giggles echo around the room.


Izzy was starting to shoo me how to play when Tyler and Eva came over and wanted to play too. So it was Izzy and I against them with Noah keeping score. And boy did my hands turn as red as lobsters eh. It took a few hours boot I think I'm starting to get the noose of it.

The noose? (chuckles)

It hasn't killed me yet so I think I'm doing good eh. Then there was this really loud scream of rage. That was the last thing I remembered.

Ahhh….yes…this is where Homeschool Boy gets knocked out by Eva's volleyball. I saw it in my mirror reflection.

Sighs.

(scoffs) He deserved it for taking his head out of the game.

And the scream was Courtney. Izzy said she hid the DVD of the last episode and Courtney found it and didn't take it to well.

Uhhh…hello? Nerd boy got Courtney kicked off!

I wouldn't have resorted to such extremes had you and Geoff actually stopped with the practical jokes GOSH!!!

Yeah but-

The kitchen grease, the underwear sandwich, the peanut butter on the bed, waking up at the dock NAKED!!!! GOSH!!!!! And you IDIOTS wouldn't stop! I may be a person of peace and of mad skills, but even I have a limit of tolerance.

So why did you vote Courtney off huh! Cause you thought she was useless? Cause you hated her?! Or was it because you wanted to hurt me through my girlfriend? Stop me when I'm getting warm.

It's not like I don't regret it. It's just you would… not…STOP!

Do you want me to translate these entries or not?


I think cause I had the minor injury and wore the white bandage on my head it saved me from her wrath. Boot I heard the words Cheater, Harold and Lawyer so many times I could hear it my sleep eh. At least when I finally am able to sleep anyway.

I think that's why I was really annoyed when Harold was the next person here. Especially after this morning. Izzy had me play ping pong. I goot the hang of it faster then the volleying ball. And since Izzy insisted on dollar bills, Tyler and Eva played ping pong at the other table.

Dollar Bills? Oh he means singles.

That Dude has a LOT to learn about the real world. (chuckles) Though you have to admit that word usage of his is a real riot.

Izzy hit the ball really hard at me and I joost swung as hard as I could. It flew past Izzy and right past the CIT who walked in talking on that…ummm…portable phone. She didn't seem very happy eh.

When is she ever happy. (snickers)

OWWW!

IDIOT! He was just stating an opinion. And you almost hit his hand! GOSH!


When she grabbed the paddle away from Tyler I knoo she wasn't happy. It's noot like I tried to hit her on purpoose! She joost walked in. Boot it doon't matter eh. She really hit that ping pong ball and right at me eh! Izzy tackled me to the carpet and the ball smacked into the wall right where my head was. I think it's stuck there eh.

And the mystery behind the imbedded ping pong ball is now solved.

It was the CIT with the ping pong paddle in the game room!!!

I was wondering how that got there…


Back to after. There was a rumor that the lawyer guy that CIT was talking to made it so she goot to go back and compete after the next camper was vooted off. Another one was that noot only would she be back competing, boot a detailed Harold humiliation ceremony would be taking place before he was forcibly kicked off by her own "honorable" hands.

A detailed ceremony…

To humiliate Harold?!

And kick MY baby off?!

Okay now that's crossing the line.

Yeeeahhh…not cool of the dudette.

I don't know….sounds like justice to me. I would have been more then happy to host it.

You would! IDIOT!!!

Gwen and Courtney wrapped in blue and white towels respectfully chose then to walk into the room. "So what did we miss?" Courtney commented brightly.


I still felt a bit soory for him though. Even on top of those rumors. CI- Coortney never seemed to loike him and this I think joost pushed her off the cliff eh. Which is weird since she never jumped.

LeShawna and Gwen give Courtney a look which she pointedly ignored. She however did feel the hand gravitating towards her towel. Scowling she gave Duncan a harsh slap.


So when he ran by still carrying his stuff, I grabbed him. Since it was the hidden staff entrance Coortney did noot notice.

So that's how you got away!


I shooed him how to get to his room without Coortney noticing, boot I told him how I felt. Geoff had made the mistake stripping on a moose and you would have won had Heather noot tried to cheat. If she didn't lean down with the hunting knife to cut the rope, her top would noot have come off eh.

So that's how you saw her boobies?!

Chuckles.

Wait a minute…you showed MY MAN your BOOBIES AND tried to CUT MY sugar baby's rope?!

Last season…old news and continue Noah!

GET BACK HERE!!!!!


When you think aboot it a loot of people ended up cheating since they messed up and stayed when they should have been gone eh. Boot fair or noot switching how people wanted to vote is joost wrong.

HUMPH!!!!


The next challenge is making me sick to my stomach. And Zee… er… Lindsay yeah that's the right name eh…well I goot to agree with her eh. All I have to say is if Chris does a challenge loike that one again to give him a taste of the apple eh!

The eight who had unfortunately participated in the Brunch of Disgustingness agreed wholeheartedly with that one.


Izzy wanted to help cook this morning. And by cook she took one of the raw fish that Chef Pierre was going to prepare for breakfast and she raced off. I chased her to the dock joost in time to see the big white boat was there with Chef on it. The moment he saw us he demanded that we get on the boat cause we were going back on the show eh.

Wait hold the phone!

So EZEKIEL was SUPPOSED to be with you and crazy girl?

Eva scoffed. "Supposed to nothing. I happened to be around to see what was happening and well…I wasn't thrilled. Homeschool tried to convince Chef to let me back on too and when Chef put his foot down on only two campers, Homeschool GAVE UP his spot on the show so I could have another chance."

As expected more then one camper was floored by this.


Confessional Can

Courtney-You mean Ezekiel was going to be on the show again?! And he just gave it up?!! It was 100,000!!! And he just turned around and gave it up?!

Heather-And to Miss Rageoholic? That settles it…prairie people are crazy.

Beth-Oh wow…that was sooo nice of him.

Katie-Totally!

DJ-The more I find out about the dude the more I'm starting to like him. (His smile disappears) And the more I feel really guilty about what happened at the resort.

Harold-It's like starting a puzzle only to find out afterwards that half the pieces are missing.

Bridgette-If Eva wasn't gunning for my blood, or Ezekiel ended up on the island too…there's all those what if factors! As much as I'd like to say I would have NOT voted for Eva had I known what Ezekiel did…I…don't think I would. Eva really freaked me out and well…first and second impressions are important.

The surfer girl sighs and looks down at the floor of the outhouse. Screen fades to static before revealing a similarly downcast Geoff.

Geoff-So that's the real reason Eva ended up back here. Man…there's so much insight and anger and hurt contained in Ezekiel's diary and it already outweighs the good moments he had with Noah and Izzy.

The party boy lets out another heavy sigh before continuing.

Geoff-And it's only going to get worse. Man…Karanda retribution stinks. I HAVE to stick it out though. It's the only way to start the healing process. I'm not looking forward to it though.


Coortney went to war the moment she found out Izzy and Eva goot to be back on the show eh. And when Eva came back in this white thing she made it clear. I think since I goot Eva out of that thing and I gave her the chance on the show I'm the only one noot in the line of fire. On the down side Coortney is on the attack if anyone mentions the words island, show or Harold. The last one especially. I doon't think it would be a good idea to mention what happened this morning eh.

Well well..Homeschool is learning.


Since I've knoon Izzy I've learned noot to question her on moost things. Her sending me a really really big purple snake I question greatly eh!!!!!

You mean…that THING was SLITHERING around the hotel?!!!

Eww Eww Eww Ewwwww!!!!!

Soooo Creepy!


Of course Snakey had to be venomous, had to loike to bite and Izzy had to insist on ME taking care of him until she goot vooted off since she did noot trust her precious snake on the island with Chris! In her words he was the sadistic mongoose out to destroy Snakey eh.

As weird as this is…

And as crazy as Izzy is…

She's got a point.


Traveling Cam

Chris's House

Chris-Now that just hurts.


So snake sitting is hard and harder then it looks eh! Moost of the time I was in one part of my room and trying to keep from being bit by those huge fangs eh! It wasn't until Anilya (which means child of the wind) and her brother Karan (it means helper companion) came to help that I was finally able to relax a little bit.

I do noot knoo Sanskrit, boot Anilya and Karan knoo broken English…enough to let me knoo aboot handling snakes eh! I'm gonna take the opportunity to try and learn that one as well. Though I doon't knoo if I will ever go to India, it is still good to knoo.

He already knows 8 languages! Why does he need to know 9?!! What do you think Bridgette?

Anilya…child of the wind…I'll have to remember that one for later…

Talk of distant future child aside… half an hour and counting and we are now up to when Trent gets voted off and we still have 9 other campers after that.

Then read already!


Soo Snakey has goot his own room now and special heating lamps. We also have music playing at all times and the windows and washroom are blooked off. Each morning I let him oot with Anilaya's or Karan's help and we take him in the kitchen to feed him some whole chickens.

That explains the obnoxious guest on the second floor.

And who wants to tell a 20ft deadly snake that it can't listen to music?!


Since Izzy sent me Snakey to take care off before the challenge ended I never goot to see the end. Boot I heard Trent was vooted off for kissing the mean girl and he and Bunny are now at the hotel. I goot to be more watchful now with a bunny rabbit here. Snake and Rabbits are noot a good combination eh.

You mean the SNAKE was LOOSE at the same time as BUNNY?!!!!

Geoff let's out a nervous chuckle and Duncan shakes his head.


I never seen a water gun before. I loike Chef's though eh. I gotta cheer for Izzy foor taking on Chef. Too bad the mean girl and Zee…Darn it I did it again eh! Anyway Lindsay goot hit first and Izzy slid off cause of the water. She would have been safe for sure had it noot been for that eh! And why did that mean girl bust the big guy and BJ and noot let Lindsay do it too? I mean two girls two guys. And I doon't think there was a busting prize eh.

Lindsay sticks her tongue out at Heather and raspberries while Beth cheers.


As soon as I found oot the surfer girl was coming here I quickly found a place to hide. Boot she was determined eh! She finally found where I hid and she chased me all over the hotel eh!

Courtney and Geoff stare at the blonde surfer who blushed. "Trent told me Ezekiel helped him get rid of the skunk smell and well…I was desperate!"


When I end up upsetting Eva on accident she usually stops the moment we pass the weight room. Boot this girl moost be determined to kill me eh! I'm noot used to all this running around and I hit the wall eh.

Well he got one term right. Hitting the wall in sports is reaching the limit of your energy.

Bridgette's face turned a darker red. "Actually Tyler, Ezekiel literally hit the wall. And after he recovered he spent at least 20 minutes cowering in fear while blurting out apologizes to me." Bridgette threw her hands up in the air in exasperation.

"It took almost forever for him to finally stop long enough to listen to me. After that he agreed to help me with the skunk problem."

Noah raised an eyebrow. "Good. We can skip to the next entry."


I heard once that no good deed goes unpunished. After waking up again in the infirmary I knoo how true that is eh. It happened after I agreed to help the surfer girl. I warned her what had to happen and she agreed. "Anything to get rid of the smell." That was what she said. So I did it oot by the pool so it could be cleaned up and her clothes could be sprayed off easy. Eva, Coortney and several of the other campers came by the moment I dumped the tomato juice over her and well…you can figure oot what happened next eh.


Confessional Can

Beth-I wasth soo mad when he did that to Bridgette!

Katie-Totally! Sadie and I refused to talk to him unless absolutely necessary after that stunt. But…now hearing all this…

Cody-And this is when it starts…the start of the supposed one sided triangle. And man…if you think witnessing it is hard enough, try listening to someone reading his journal. Nothing will be held back. (he sighed.) Including the hurt.


I have everyone still boiled aboot the tomato bath I gave to surfer and there all give me the silent treatment at the pool which I cannot take and…I'm staring at one of the girls playing ball in the water. Why am I staring at one of the girls in the water? Dad always said…Oh no…I can't…this can noot be happening eh. Noot now. I can't loike loike one of them! They all HATE ME after what I did to Surfer!

"Girls in the water playing ball?" Courtney demanded looking at the other females in the room. Slowly Bridgette, Beth, Eva and Katie raised their hands, though Eva was more then reluctant to do so. "Sadie was playing the game too." Katie chimed in helpfully.

Duncan and Geoff snapped their fingers in annoyance and disappointment. "So back to square one on the crush girl." The present four water girls looked at each other with various degrees of emotion.


Confessional Can

Bridgette-Well Ezekiel is still calling me Surfer and he clearly referred to another girl…so Cody is right. The crush girl is NOT me. Now we just have to find out who she is.

Eva-So do I think Prairie Boy has a crush on me? Of course NOT! While I HAVE to admit…he's not as bad as he was in the mess hall.

Katie- Oh first crushes are sooo sweet! I think Ezekiel has a crush on Sadie. She's my BFFFL! I mean how could he not?

Beth-Am I the crush girl? Well…I don'th really know. So far he's made it reeeallly hard to tell who she isth. Do I want to be? I…


Despite the warnings in several different languages posted in plain sight one of the new staff members opened Snakey's door.

And the snake got out.

The SNAKE got OUT!!!!!

(shivers) I thought I felt something heavy move over my foot…

Do I even WANT to know where that thing went?!

Let me read and I'm sure he'll tell you.


It was easy to find oot the one who opened the door. He did noot take finding a 20ft lethal snake in the room too well eh. Finding Snakey was much harder and it took a long time. I finally did and I was happy that I did, boot the way I had to do it…See on the first floor there were these big comfy chairs right by the windows and the sun was shining…

Bridgette abruptly paled and her eyes were wide. "Chair…Sit…Chair…Ezekiel…" Geoff instantly reacted. "Bridge! Snap out of it Babe!" When his girlfriend didn't respond he kissed her. Slowly but surely Bridgette started to respond to his kisses. Keeping his girl preoccupied he waved a hand for Noah to continue.


Snakey was sunning himself on one of the chairs. And Surfer did noot see him and started to sit down. I joost reacted and leaped. Surfer let oot a yell since noot only did I knook her away from the chair I also landed on top of her. I joost froze eh. I doon't think I was even aware of her. I joost kept my eyes on Snakey as Anilaya took him away.

Then Coortney appeared and let oot this enraged scream and that brought me back. Surfer and the CIT were joost giving me these awful looks. I told them that I tripped and fell on Surfer. Which did noot go over well eh. Wot was I supposed to say? Soory I joost saved yoor friend from getting bit by a poisonous snake?


Confessional Can

Courtney-That's exactly what he should have said. And he should have showed us…"Snakey" no matter how much we would have protested. At least then we would have understood his reasoning somewhat.

Lindsay-Oh my gosh he totally just saved Brina's life!

Bridgette-I almost got bit by a Killer Snake…and I never even knew it. But why didn't he tell me that? I would have understood that. At least better then the "I tripped and fell on you by mistake" line.

Geoff-Ezekiel Dude!!! I sooo could kiss you for saving my girl! (sniff) How come you never told us about that?!

The party animal then pauses as it hits him. And he's more then a little depressed by it.

Geoff -Right…We would have yelled at you for lying and punished you for hitting on Bridge.


I stayed in my room until the next day. I joost did noot want to run into them or anyone else so I missed the next person getting vooted off until the next moorning. Karan and Pierre have gooten to be friends and they made a suggestion to me. I wish…I never had took it eh. Wot happened in there….GOD! Am I…that MUCH of a horrible person?! How could people…do something that….hurtful?

Noah closed the COB book to the others great protests and turned to Geoff. "The phone if you will Mr. Party Obsessed." As Geoff handed Noah the phone, the bookworm studied the blinking light with a raised eyebrow. "You have a new message." Noah drawled before starting to push the buttons.


Imagi's Ramblings: Okay this one got even LOONGER then the first. This time I hit…14 pages!!!! So yeah…the COB Book as of now has officially been extended to 3 parts. And don't worry…it won't be more then that! This time I'm POSITIVE!!! :D

So…More craziness with Ezekiel, Izzy and Owen under the same roof, journal entries on Harold, Trent and Bridgette revealed, the reappearance of Izzy's beloved Snakey, vomit, more vomit and some towel scenes with Gwen and Courtney…the surprises at the dock and otherwise…

Yeah.

It's safe for me to say I can wrap it up here. Just means I'll have to work on posting the next chapter tonight. But first…the neglected chores…sigh.

Sooo as always thank you guys sooo much for reviewing. I greatly greatly appreciate it and I'm very glad people are still continuing to read and enjoy my *cough* Christmas *cough* story. :)

Thanks again! :)

Imagi