The Clown Prince of crime had an important event to attend and his plus one was nowhere to be found. Many robberies and capers after the tattoo shop job the Joker had amassed a small fortune. Together he and Harley had purchased an old dive bar in the club district and completely renovated it. Tonight was the grand opening of his newest venture, Sirens of Gotham a strip club with an illegal casino on the basement level. It was the fourth of July, Gotham's nightlife would be thirsty and in the mood to gamble their cash away. The Joker even had Jonny Frost wrangle an ice cream truck for the event it would be parked out front serving alcoholic beverage themed ice cream guaranteed to get you sloshed. Harley was in bed asleep when Joker returned to the penthouse that morning but he'd woken up alone after sleeping most of the day away. Frost was already at the grand opening, he'd called to check where his boss was and find out why he was running late. Frost doesn't get through on the first call so he waits a minute before trying again. Back in the penthouse Joker rolls out of bed and finds his pants from the night before and pulls his phone out of a pocket.

"Harley," he calls out "Get dressed we're already late!"

His voice echoes in the spacious penthouse, where in the hell was Harley? Joker takes a look in the mirror and smirks. His hair was a mess and he needed Harley to do his makeup. The phone rings, it was Frost again.

"What?" Joker had only been awake for five minutes and he was already pissed off.

"Boss," Frost was on his own running the event for now "The fire marshal just showed up they're trying to shut down the ice cream truck."

"Bribe them with some cash and a VIP table," Joker goes into the walk-in closet "I'll handle it when I get there don't bother me again!"

Joker hangs up on his henchman and starts getting ready for the night. Harley had picked out a white tuxedo with a purple and gold harlequin patterned tie. Somewhere along the way Harley had become Joker's stylist. He'd never admit it but he wouldn't be able to find his shoes or dual gun holster without her. Feeling more annoyed that Harley was still absent, Joker gets in the shower and washes the previous night off of him. He gets out of the shower and gets dressed, Harley really had an eye when it came to dressing her Puddin. Joker admires the sharp tux in a full-length mirror, he hangs the tie around his neck and comes back into the bedroom.

"Harley," he does a lap around the penthouse "Time to go where in the hell are you?"

Joker pauses in the living room, he'd heard a floorboard creak. Harley was here and ignoring him, two could play at that game. Joker goes to the liquor cabinet to make a drink and notices a bottle of top shelf vodka is missing. The Joker starts opening closets, looking under furniture. He was going to knock the shit out of Harley for pulling this nonsense on such an important night. Finally, he finds Harley Quinn his parter in crime and business hiding in one of the smaller bathrooms. He'd missed her the first time she was sitting in the bathtub with the shower curtain concealing her. She was still in her pajamas nursing the bottle of vodka. Joker rips the curtain down and yanks the bottle out of her hands.

"What the hell Harl," he hisses "Get up and dressed I can kick your ass later!"

Harley doesn't move other than swaying drunkenly and looking up at him with a blank stare. Having had enough of Harley and her moods, Joker grabs one of her arms and yanks her out of the tub. She stays on her feet for a moment as the room spins then she falls to her knees at Joker's feet, unable to stay upright. Joker raises his hand to slap her then he sees the cause of Harley's sudden disappearance. There was an empty pregnancy test box on the rim of the tub with the test next to it along with a handgun. Joker does a double-take and snatches up the gun, putting it in his holster.

"It's negative," Harley slurs "I was celebrating."

"Are you positive you're negative," Joker kneels and holds Harley's face in his hands "What was the gun for?"

Joker's heart hammers and nearly skips a beat. If Harley got pregnant she'd be of no use to him and the Joker couldn't have a child. The nightclubs and businesses were Joker's children.

"I'm not pregnant," Harley giggles "That's what's the gun was for."

"Jesus Harl," Joker pulls Harley to her feet and holds her "If anyone's going to shoot you it's gonna be me."

Harley just nods and stumbles off to get dressed. Joker waits in the master bath while Harley showers. The showers sobers her up a little bit and she gets out feeling refreshed. She wordlessly goes about getting dressed and doing her makeup. Harley slips into a slinky silver cocktail dress and curls her two-toned hair. Joker stands behind her as she sits in front of the mirror and does her makeup.

"Want me to do your lips?" the first words Harley had really spoken since Joker found her. He sits down next to her and Harley gives him a ruby smile.

"Can you do the smoky eyes again," Joker smacks his lips at the mirror "Were you really going to do it?"

Harley sits on Joker's lap and starts doing his eye makeup.

"Yes," Harley answers both questions "How smoky do you want them?"

Joker grabs Harley's wrist and pulls her closer.

"The last thing we need is an ankle biter," Joker keeps his voice even "The last thing I need is to find you brains spattered everywhere you hear me?"

"Whatever." Harley puts down the eyeliner and starts smudging Joker's eyes for the smoky effect. Joker lets her finish then he grabs her and backs her into a wall, pinning her arms.

"Did you hear me?" Joker shakes her.

"I got it!" Harley yells back. She jerks out of his grasp and picks out a pair of stilettos. Still bickering, the Clowns get in the elevator and go down to the garage level. They get in the Jokermobile and drive to the nightclub district. The grand opening of Sirens of Gotham was going well. Joker hands his car keys to Frost when they arrive. The fire marshal was inside enjoying his free table service and the ice cream truck was still going strong. Joker schmoozes with the crime bosses and Bat villains that had come out to support his endeavor. Harley goes straight for the ice cream truck and gets an alcoholic cone of pineapple rum ice cream. Joker finds her and they walk into the club together. The pair gets mobbed by Clown groupies and Frost is forced to clear a path to Joker's platform. Joker sits on his throne and watches the party with Harley at his side. Penguin approaches them and congratulates Joker on all his recent success. Harley slips away while Penguin and Joker are talking and goes back outside to the ice cream truck. The event would be talked about for years to come but Harley was bored. She bumps into the Catwoman, Selina was dressed to kill and on the clock. The two chat for a moment then Selina spots a woman draped in expensive jewelry.

"There's my mark," Selina kisses Harley's cheek "See you around Harley girl."

Harley sighs as Selina slinks off she missed having friends. Mr. J had become her world. She gets another rum cone and turns to go back inside when a whistle distracts her. Harley turns and sees Eddie Nygma, the Riddler standing in the crowd. He was working on a daiquiri cone and dressed sharp as ever in a green blazer and black pants with his hat.

"Harley Quinn," Riddler takes her free hand and kisses it "We have to stop meeting like this."

Harley laughs and tosses her hair. She'd met Nygma more than once but it was always in passing.

"Looking good Eddie," Harley grins "Aren't you out on bail?"

"I'm afraid my days of freedom are numbered," Riddler grins "Where's your beau?"

"He's a busy man," Harley nods to the building "This is our biggest party yet."

"And yet the smiling princess isn't happy," Riddler cocks his head "How about a dance?"

Before Harley can reply Frost comes lumbering up. He gives Nygma a playful shove and grabs Harley by the shoulder.

"Boss wants you inside," Frost jerks on Harley's arm "Come on!"

Harley plants her heels and slips out of Frost's grasp.

"I'm going to dance with Eddie," Harley heads for the front door "If Mr. J wants me he can come get me!"

Riddler grins triumphantly and gets the door for Harley. The victory is short-lived he gets to twirl Harley around the dance floor for about two minutes before the Joker cuts in.

"Scram Nygma," Joker comes up behind Harley and kisses her cheek "No one dances with my doll but I'll let this one slide."

"Good to see you too." Riddler gives Joker an icy glare and melts into the crowd.

"Come with me," Joker takes Harley by the hand "I have something for you."

Joker leads Harley up to the roof. He'd had Frost set up a table with champagne and more importantly privacy. Harley and her Puddin were finally alone with the Gotham night sky. Joker pours the champagne and looks at his watch.

"What," Harley sips her champagne "You have your sneaky face on."

Joker pulls her close and puts down his glass. He spins Harley around and points at the sky.

"The fireworks," Joker grins "I'm glad you didn't blow your brains out it was a bitch keeping this a surprise."

Harley gasps as the show starts. The fireworks bloom in beautiful colors, a blue and pink heart lights up the sky, a representation of Harley's birth. The show ends with Harley and Joker's faces lighting up the sky brighter than the Bat signal before it fades away. Harley giggles with delight and throws her arms around her Puddin.

"I'm sorry Mr. J," Harley sniffs back tears "Sometimes I forget what I'm living for."

"You little fool," Joker kisses her hair "You live for me and I'll build you an empire, deal?"

"Works for me," Harley looks up at Joker "Shouldn't we get back to the party?"

"Oh Harley," Joker waves a hand dismissively "We are the party."

The Clowns have another glass of champagne before departing the rooftop. Harley spends the rest of the night at her Puddin's side. The party goes till the wee hours of the morning and it seems like years before Harley and Joker are home in bed together. Why can't it always be like this Harley thinks as she drifts off to sleep.

Author's note: another mini-crime this one kinda came out of nowhere I wanted to work on this story but it's too soon for the next chapter. Hope you enjoyed please R&R