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The Rilow household was usually abuzz with some sort of commotion thanks to the four children or the generally talkative parents. Hanschen and Heidi would normally be arguing about something or other, the nine year old twins Franz and Gisele would be running around the house playing some complicated make believe game, and Herr and Frau Rilow would be having some heated conversation about what the world was coming to.

However tonight there was an uncomfortable silence settled over the family as they sat round the dining table. Hanschen and Heidi were seated along one side of the table, the twins along the opposite side and the parents at either end, exchanging glances. Frau Rilow was the first to speak.

'Children. As I am sure you know, there have been a few incidents in the village. Moritz Steifels suicide, that poor Wendla Bergmann's death...'

Herr Rilow took over. 'What your mother and I are trying to say is that this seems to be a poisonous environment for children such as yourselves.'

Frau Rilow cleared her throat. 'We have been forced to make a decision... The family is moving to Weimar.'

'What?' Hanschen was the first to cry out, closely echoed by Heidi.

'Mother, no! You can't - I can't-'

'Children, please.' Herr Rilow said. 'This was a difficult enough decision to make, please don't make it any more so for us.'

As Hanschen sat back, numb with shock, he involuntarily had one thought ever-present in his mind - Ernst. His Ernst. He couldn't leave him. He was sure of it.

'When do we leave?' Heidi asked, her voice cracking.

'Two weeks tomorrow.'

'What?'

'I know, it will be hard for you all to leave your friends. I know, Hanschen, you've certainly become close to that Ernst Robel.'

You don't even know, Hanschen thought bitterly as he flashed a warning look at Heidi. He suddenly wanted to be alone.

'True, mother,' he said. 'I will miss Ernst but I suspect it will be harder for Heidi to leave her new friend. Was it Dieter Karsten you've been seeing a lot of recently, Heidi?'

Heidi's eyes widened, and Herr and Frau Rilow looked straight at her accusingly. Hanschen used this opportunity to leave, sprinting upstairs to his room.

When he got in there he lay back on his bed, covering his face with his hands. Ernst, Ernst, Ernst, Ernst, Ernst. It wasn't fair. Ernst was his study mate, his best friend, his... lover... Usually it was the thought of Ernst or Ernst's awaiting lips that pulled him through the day, and now, he was leaving. And he cared.

It actually scared him a little how much he didn't want to leave Ernst. The shy endearing classmate of his who had only been intended as a release. He'd never meant to feel... anything. He was even hesitant to call himself and Ernst lovers simply because it contained the word "love." He didn't love Ernst... he couldn't... he... He hated that he cared so much, and didn't know what to think.

'Nice going, arsehole,' someone said, interrupting his thoughts. Hanschen looked up. Heidi was standing over his bed. 'You won't believe the interrogation mother and father just gave me.' Hanschen barely grunted. 'Still, I guess it doesn't matter now.' She sat on the bed, pushing Hanschen's legs aside. He sat up grumpily and hung his head. 'If we're moving, I might as well drop contact with everyone I know.' She finished.

Hanschen said nothing. 'Hey,' she said gently. She tapped the bottom of his chin lightly, forcing him to look up at her. 'What are you gonna do about Ernst?'

He sighed. 'Nothing. Like you said, drop all contact.' His sister tutted. 'That's not right. Listen, mother and father said, after you ditched us, that it may not be permanent. We will have this house for ten weeks after we move, and if we do well in Weimar, we stay. But there is still hope that we will stay here. Believe me, I don't want to move. For the moment, just be. But don't burn all your bridges just yet.'

Hanschen nodded. 'Thank you,' he said quietly but sincerely. She smiled and ruffled his hair. He winced but smiled back.

Standing up to leave, Heidi said 'Oh, and one more thing... Involve our parents in my love life ever again and I will have to hurt you.'

'Of course. Goodnight.'

'Goodnight.'

As Hanschen tossed and turned that night, he thought only of the question sparked by his sister's advice. Should he enjoy the time he had left with Ernst, and hope to return? Or leave, quick and painless, clean break?

Oh, Ernst...

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"What the heart has once had and owned, it will never lose."

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