Root's movements returned as Shaw was carrying her up the stairs to her apartment but she was still too weak to resist. Once inside, Root was zip-tied to one of her dining room chairs. Shaw went into the bathroom, returning with a wash cloth. She gently cleaned Root's face and checked her for any serious injuries.

Once she was convinced Root's injuries were superficial, she put the wash cloth back and returned. She looked at Root and took a deep breath. Root wouldn't even raise her head to look her in the eye. Shaw pushed ahead anyway.

"So here's the deal. I'm going to talk to you for a few minutes, then when I'm done I will cut the zip-ties and leave. I won't bother you anymore, but before that you're going to hear everything that happened two weeks ago and why it happened."

Shaw took a deep breath, gathered her courage, and began.

"You're like an itch you can't scratch, you ignore me if I tell you to leave me alone, I can't insult you enough to make you go away and you've gotten under my skin to the point it could be detrimental to the team.

"I don't know what to do with the feelings that have been building inside me since I met you. I've lost sleep at night, been distracted in the field and watched way too many images of you dance across my imagination. I thought if you just went away it would stop and I could go on like before.

"Unfortunately, for me, there is no longer a 'like before'. You managed to get so far inside my head that I can't stop thinking about you no matter how hard I try. This was what caused that night."

Root's face darkened and she interrupted.

"So that's what we're calling it, huh? That night? How about betrayal. You know, I probably could have dealt with the hurt if you'd been honest that you had a date with him, Shaw. But to act like it was just too much effort to acknowledge the day, then to meet him, leave with him, and sleep with him? That's way too much.

"Although I have to give you credit- if you were looking for a way to sever any ties, you picked a perfect situation. As I said that night, message delivered."

Shaw bent over Root and scowled at her. She tried to speak but all that came out was a groan as she shook her head.

"Damnit Root! That's not what happened. You're going to hear what really happened before I cut these ties. And then it's up to you what you believe and what you do- although I can't blame you for walking away when I've given you absolutely no reason to stay."

Before Root could respond, Shaw plowed on.

"I ran into Tomas totally by accident. I was in the park and couldn't shake the feeling that I was being followed. I made him following me, we talked and he asked me to meet him at the club you saw us at.

"I agreed to go because I had just spent the last hour trying to figure out how to deal with all these feelings you were causing to grow inside me. I didn't like them and wanted to get rid of them. Using Tomas seemed the perfect solution. I could prove to myself being with someone other than you was just as good, just as satisfying as being with you was.

"So I met him. Hell Root, he's hot, he's charming and he was coming on to me like a dog in heat. Every second I was with him was like I was two people: one enjoying the flirtation, the dance, the potential conquest, the other…"

Shaw paused and considered whether to share the rest or try to salvage both her pride and Root's feelings, then in a moment of clarity decided- All in. She's getting the whole truth and damn the consequences.

"He asked if I wanted to get out of there and I said 'let's go'. I had every intention of going wherever he took me and doing anything and everything. The goal was to get you out of my mind permanently. Unfortunately, exactly the opposite happened.

"During the ride to his hotel room, I found myself wondering what it would be like if you were with me in the cab instead of him. In the elevator on our way up I found myself wondering what it would be like if you were beside me instead of him.

"As we entered his room, he slammed me against the wall and started kissing me, and I wondered what it would be like if you slammed me against a wall and kissed me. Then my dress was on the floor and I wondered what it would be like if it was you who had just pulled it down.

"Then I looked into his eyes…" Shaw's eyes began to tear up at this. She cleared her throat and continued. "Then I looked into his eyes and what I saw stopped me cold. His eyes held nothing but victory and conquest. And I remembered.

"I remembered the look of affection and I don't know, concern for me whenever we were together. I don't have the right to call those looks love because of what I've done to you, but in my imagination, that's the look I'll always want to see when I'm with someone. And of course I blew any chance of having it ever again with you. I see that now.

"Anyway, I pushed him away and when he became aggressive I put a knife at his throat. I got dressed and took a cab to your apartment. I was devastated by what I saw there because the evidence of how much I hurt you screamed from the dining room to the bathroom.

"I tried calling you a couple times and when I didn't get an answer, I was ready to give up and go home. Then I remembered your friend. I opened your laptop and begged it to tell me where you had gone. It texted me an address, and you know the rest. I looked for you in that bar, found you and made a bigger ass of myself than I thought possible.

"I've spent the last couple weeks wondering how it all went wrong. How I could let the only chance for happiness slip through…. no, that's bull. How I could throw away the only chance I'll ever have at happiness because I was so full of myself and full of pride- oh let's face it- full of shit. I convinced myself I had this disorder so I could never be hurt by allowing myself to be honest about my feelings.

"And my having them was obvious- at least to me looking back. I always could do anger and I let myself care about Bear and the members of our team. You can't just compartmentalize feelings- you either have them or you don't. And as far as you were concerned I had them in spades.

"The problem was I thought I could set them aside at my convenience instead of dealing with them and admitting them to myself and, most importantly, to you. That I'll regret this for the rest of my life is my problem. That I hurt you so deeply is something I'll never be able to get over. I can't expect you to forgive me, but I want you to know how sorry I am for what I did.

"I will regret the way I treated you, not just that night, but the many times I acted like that, for the rest of my life. I let my one true love slip through my fingers- all because I was an idiot."

Shaw wiped her eyes, which had been leaking tears off and on for the last few minutes. She reached into her jeans, withdrew her knife and sliced the zip-ties that held Root tethered to the chair. She turned and headed for the door, stopping at it it briefly. Without turning she said,

"I know it's too late, but I want you to know that I love you and I think I've loved you for quite a while. I'm sorry again for what I did, not just that night, but so often over the past year."

Shaw opened the door and stepped toward the hall. As she reached back to close the door, a hand grabbed her wrist and pulled her back inside, turning her toward the apartment. Startled, she looked into Root's face and saw the tears running down her cheeks while her eyes were wide with wonder, and a hint of the affection Shaw had described.

"Oh no, you think you're getting out of here after that? No way. It's my turn now."

And Root slammed Shaw up against the wall and kissed her, violently and passionately. The kiss seemed to go on for hours, when in reality it was only a minute or so. As they broke apart and came up for air, Root continued.

"How about I forgive you and you spend the rest of our lives making it up to me?" She smirked at Shaw.

Shaw smiled in wonder.

"I can live with that."