Class is odd. The students seem to be in a state of exhaustion, and I can't blame them. Ever since my...discussion with Emi, I've been distracted, too.

Mutou comes in, looking a bit fatigued himself and possibly suffering from the effects of a hangover. Instead of going on a lecture, he simply writes down problems on the board before disappearing behind his desk.

I shrug off the oddity and turn to Hanako, who seems to have decided to stay in class and work with me. I note the Student Council giving her a look I can't readily interpret, but choose to ignore it.

Well, actually, everyone is still staring, and it still makes Hanako nervous. To be fair, I'm not particularly thrilled, either. Doing my best to ignore it, I turn to the girl in front of me.

"Is the shopping trip still on?" I ask the purple-haired girl. She smiles, timidly.

"Y-Yes, unless..." I catch the implied question and shake my head.

"No, I'm still free, unless I manage to get myself in trouble between now and the end of the day." I lightly kick at my crutch, placed under my desk. "You can't really prepare for these things."

"Oh...if the trip would be too difficult...?" Hanako starts off uncertainly, clearly hoping that isn't the case.

"Um, I don't think so. I've been healing well enough." I absentmindedly fiddle with my sleeves. "I should be off of this by tomorrow, according to Nurse."

Hanako looks relieved. "That's good to h-hear. Um..." She pauses, apparently trying to figure out how to say something. I wait expectantly.

"H-How did you...get hurt?" She asks, staring at her desk. I'm not sure if she's asking broadly about my condition or just about my leg, but I'll take the safer and less invasive option.

"Well, for my condition, one of the things I have to do is physical therapy. I might not be able to feel my body, but that doesn't mean it can't be hurt." I reply. "So I have to keep it reasonably fit, and one of the ways to do that is to get consistent exercise. Generally I do that by walking, but the Nurse recommended that I go to the track."

"O-Oh...that's how you started running with Emi?" Hanako asks, looking pensive. I nod.

"I'll hopefully be able to properly run with her soon. It was fun while it lasted, though." I say, not realizing how bitter that sounded until after I've said it. She cringes slightly, and I wonder if I've accidentally plucked a nerve for her.

"Ah, sorry. That didn't come out right, did it?" I frown. It must be especially bad for me to say something callous like that, considering her accident.

"N-No, it's...okay..." Hanako replies quickly, though still looking rather sad. It's painfully obvious to both of us that she's just saying that so I don't worry, but I ignore it, trying to find a safer topic.

"The questions?" I ask, realizing that we haven't even started on the assignment. She starts, apparently having forgotten about them too.

"Y-Yes, let's do that..." We quickly pull out our materials, studiously not looking at each other. Besides the occasional question, nothing else is said.

It bothers me, but there's nothing to be done about it. Hanako is still clearly jarred by my statement, though not nearly as tense as how she was when we first met. Our eyes occasionally meet and flicker away, but the tension isn't as pronounced as it would be before.

People still occasionally glance at us, but, for once, Hanako seems blissfully unaware of this, working on the given problems with a quiet intensity.

When class ends and lunch begins, we move our desks back. Hanako waits for Lilly, I think, but right this second I don't want to be around anyone. With a goodbye to Hanako I escape the room, my bag around my shoulder as I dart away from the classroom, away from Class 3-2, where Lilly is undoubtedly coming from. Right now, it's just better if I stay away from everyone.

My feet take me to the garden courtyard. My garden courtyard. It's not mine and won't ever be, but there's no one to contest my claim in my head. I sit down on the bench next to me, staring blankly at the nearest tree.

I keep forgetting that we're not normal people. That the things we say can and will be taken differently by people like us, because...we've suffered. We've went through so much, lost so much more, and understand things like others can't.

In turn, though, we're not all fragile. We aren't a different kind of person. But we all have our own personal hurts, hurts that have wounded us so deeply...

And I may have inadvertently triggered one of those mines for Hanako. I'm really, genuinely afraid that I've broken what we had, and that's something I'm...

I'm terrified of losing.

I don't want to lose again. That's really what it comes down to. I know it's inevitable, inevitable that I lose that which I want to hold on to. But I don't want to.

I'm sick of losing.

That's why I'm so hurt now. Afraid of losing Emi to whatever darkness she fights, afraid of losing Hanako to my own clumsiness. I hate it, I hate it, I hate it.

But I have an obligation now, and I must do at least this much. To see Hanako through with her shopping. No matter how much I may want to avoid her now, afraid of what she thinks of me, I have no choice. I must face her, and see if she can still stand me.

For now, though, I will hide, trapping myself inside this cocoon of despair and resentment.

...

No.

No!

This is what I wanted to avoid, wasn't it? Doing this. This stupid thing. Perhaps I haven't changed as much as I thought I did, if I find myself in the same cycle again.

I have to do better than this...

But...what if I can't...?

...

By the time I regain my senses, a significant amount of time has passed. The sun is still high up in the air, thank goodness; I don't think I've missed my appointment with Hanako, but...I've probably accidentally cut a few classes. So...it might be better if I deal with that first.

Damnit.

I carefully reach up to my face and wipe off the leftover tears, doing my best to be presentable again. If I can at all avoid it, I won't have everyone know I've been crying.

Where do I go...?

Nurse? I guess. I don't know where the main office is, and I don't want to lose more time figuring it all out. I'll just head to somewhere familiar, I guess.

It's at this moment that I realize I've left my crutch behind. And...that I ran all the way here.

Whatever. I don't think I need it anymore.

...

As it turns out, the crutch is perfectly fine, having been brought to Nurse's office.

After informing the concerned parties that I am perfectly fine, Nurse excuses me for the rest of the day. I thank him gratefully, and he only shrugs, serious for once. I guess he understands my confused and tumbly emotional state right now, and doesn't want to pry too much. He does ask me if I want to see a therapist, in nicer words, but I pass it down, for now.

I don't know if it's the stigma associated with seeing a psychiatrist, or the fact that I don't want to rely on even more people, but something about the idea gnaws at me in a way I strongly dislike.

Nurse half-heartedly lectures me about my mad dash through the hallways, particularly considering my thigh strain, and runs a short physical exam on me. Ultimately he concludes that I haven't exacerbated my healing (healed?) injury and that I should be fine to move around on it.

Yay.

I find it difficult to really care. I'm infinitely more focused on the fact that there are exactly twelve minutes left on the clock before school officially ends. Nurse seems to recognize this, and ultimately shrugs, deciding that I just made a stupid mistake and that I can be trusted not to do it again, without good reason.

He lets me wander off at about five minutes left, and I steadily make my way towards the room in question. Idly, I wonder whether or not I should enter before school ends, but decide against it. There's no need to create a pointless disruption. With that in mind, I make my way up the stairs towards my classroom.

I hope she's still there; I hope that she thinks that I'll be here at the appointed time. I told her that I would be here for her and I don't intend on going back on that promise. I've broken enough things to know what I need to keep.

The bell rings and people stream out like ants, racing to freedom. Some of my classmates give me odd looks as they exit, but most pass by without noticing me. I slip into the classroom as it empties, my eyes scanning the classroom.

Hanako's there, looking up at me with a questioning gaze. I smile upon seeing her, a little selfish pang blossoming in my chest.

She's here. She waited for me.

Thank you.


A/N: I know that resolved itself pretty quickly. Don't worry. It was never meant to be a serious point of conflict. It simply hints at the real conflicts looming ahead.

Speaking of which, there's been some interesting symbolism in this chapter what with the time. A cookie to anyone that figures out what it is. I like to try doing things like this all the time and they exist in other chapters as well, but this one is definitely the most obvious one so far.

The next chapter will likely arrive on Saturday, unless I'm in a good mood. Review if you can, thank you!

EDIT: There is some new stuff on my profile, including a timeline and a poll! Check it out if you wish. Thanks!