Chapter 3 – The window ties us together.
The huge square balcony doors in the apartment framed a world in spring outside. If one laid oneself down on the floor, one could watch a cloud-less, azure sky which if someone opened the window, carted bitter-fresh, frozen winds to the winter tired Konoha. On the other hand if one were to walk as close as possible to the window and look down, one would see between the floorboards of the balcony, schoolchildren walking home in their new spring clothes. And if one pressed the ear against the cool glass one could even hear them laugh merrily as they skipped down the newly-green backstreet, arm in arm with their best friend or someone a little more important.
The old cotton bed-settee rocked as she threw herself down next to me passing the bowl with sweets to me at the same time. As she turned to watch the apartment on the other side of the street through the window I let myself fall down onto my stomach from lying propped up on the side against the back of the couch. Accidently brushing against her hip. May the Father in heaven forgive me. So close, yet so far away.
"It's almost dinner time…Aren't they behind schedule?"
Her voice breaks through the desperate inner prayer I'm sending to heaven.
"Mmmhm… A bit." it feels good to take my time to answer, to laze around. It was such a long time since last time. "Maybe, something happened?"
"….20000 yen on that they've had a fight"
"Pardon? Them? Never! But it's spring so maybe he has had a busy day at work and has not returned yet."
"Sooo…No bet?"
"I don't gamble-" Two big, clear eyes turns in my direction, one eyebrow rising up in disbelief. "most of the time. There's been some exceptions-" a slow smirk crawl over her face. "How many could be discussed, but I have never-" her eyebrow went down again to get caught up in a frown as she tires to not laugh at me. Redemption was drowning in a lake of my own making. Must make a save. Must make a save. "done it I'm in my right mind." I felt lame. And every bit of the geek she sometimes called me.
"You mean you don't make bets unless you're drunk and crawling on the floor?" As the blush burns on my cheeks she grins brightly and quips "Yeah, Jiraya told me. He's an awesome storyteller. Could write a book or something." As she turned away I could not help but feel as if I avoided a destructive blow to my ego and pride, because sadly those two are very dependent upon Kushina's view of me nowadays.
"You don't fear many people but you won't gamble. Oh, well. You wouldn't be you if you weren't a bit meek at the edges."
I will most certainly pretend that's a compliment. Most women like men like that. I'm just responsible. It's a good trait. A trustworthy trait. Should I say something manly about football now to even it out? So I smile stupidly and say stupidly;
"…Soo. Football looks like it hurts huh?" NONONONONONONONONONO!! SO NOT MANLY!
"Shh, here they come. I can't focus if you talk." Funny I was just thinking that I can't focus when you're HERE.
On the other side of the street two teenage boys go about their daily lives in the apartment as usual. Not knowing they're being watched. By one very disturbed kunoichi and one very much in love Ninja. Does me loving her make me even more disturbing than her?
The boys seem to have a brief discussion before the older bulkier boy sink down into the couch which back faces their window, blocking him from view. Kushina curses but I can't help but mumble a "see, they haven't fought" earning me a kick to the shin, which didn't bother me all that much because she had to twist a lot to do it and when she did….I sent another prayer to the father in heaven, hoping he'll forgive me.
After that not much happens in the apartment across the street to my huge relief. The smaller, meeker looking dark haired boy moves about the apartment, cleaning, preparing dinner and what not. Totally innocent – and I thank the divine powers for it. Kushina keeps munching away on her sweets, muttering comments about boredom and how much effort she's made to get here tonight for this entertainment. Then, the teenager that had until then been sleeping on the couch wakes up and calls out to the other one who pokes his head out of the kitchen to listen. They talk for a bit. The smaller teenagers face changing expression from time to time. Then he moves towards the couch while taking of his shirt and – I bury my face in the pillow my head has until now been lying on. I can't believe I agreed to this. Just because she's "curious". Why can't she have the ordinary teenager curiosities? Most girls want to shop, talk about boys and so on. It's not like she'll ever end up in a homosexual relationship like this. She's a girl! I on the other hand am a boy. And this is getting uncomfortable. Suddenly she turns and flops down on her back only to stare at my roof while mumbling thoughtfully –
"I thought there was more mystery to it than that…"
"They're people. People love almost in the same way, that I can guarantee you. The procedures are just a bit different from what you see on TV." I mumble hoping tremendously that it's out of her system and that she'll allow me to go to the kitchen to make US dinner without making stupid comments about how shy I am. Because I'm not. Shy that is.
"Do you want dinner?"
"Mmmm." she seems far away. Thinking really hard about something, while her eyes pierces my roof. I get up to unsuccessfully climb over her and get of the bed-settee without touching her. It was not intentional so I hope that He does not prepare to beat me up when I get there.
As I reach the kitchen I take a moment to take a deep breath. I am going to be making dinner for US. Like a romantic dinner for two. Only I'll be the only one who knows. Thankfully, I'm prepared for this and open the fridge to pull out the minced meat and some other things to make Bolognese. The saucepan for the pasta is already on the stove. It's not boiling yet so I have no reason to focus on it right now. And I get to work.
"Mimi!" Wincing at the nickname she calls me whenever she wants to tease I stick my head out of the kitchen to see what she wants.
"Who would you like to have sex with?" The question is so out of the blue (but not really) and so unthinkably non question-able (but not really) that I can't find my voice. I try to salvage the situation from my squeaking voice box by trying to lean casually against the old wooden door frame that immediately gives me a splinter. And now it is much more noticeable that I'm shaking a bit.
"Wh-a-at? Well, I don't kn-o-ow." Playing it cool is much harder when you have to talk and think at the same time. So much for being a genius.
"Would you have sex with me?" God Yes!
"Uhm, why do you ask?"
"No reason." She shrugs then just turn away to look through the window again. And my hormones let out a painful howl before burning my cheeks like acid. And I really try to put it all together again and go back into the kitchen, but she's so close and her father is so far away and I'm not going to die for another years so I don't care what he'll do and if I could just do it with her I know I'll die happy and….I am a shinobi of Konoha. I am a tool of protection. I will be Hokage. I have responsibilities. I must…Is that smoke?
As Minato starts to scream in falsetto behind me I can't help but muse over what he might be. He did seem bothered by watching the gay men. But it could both be embarrassment and no interest in "other people's intimate business" as he called it when I asked if I could come and watch his neighbours. His reaction to the thought of having sex with me was off too. If he really is gay he might feel uncomfortable saying it to me. Even though I'm his friend. Lucky for him then that I figured it out on my own. I allow myself a satisfied grin as I let my head fall down from its propped up position back unto the pillow.
In a small apartment, in a village that is in the middle of a blooming spring, a man tries desperately to put out a kitchen fire before it spreads while his female companion is too deep into her thoughts to notice anything. Thirty minutes later the male enters into the living-/bedroom carrying a plate with sandwiches that he offers to her. She gives her thanks the only way her pride allows her by saying they taste good as she devours one whole. He just smiles in a relieved manner while thinking that he'll fight for his chance at her at the same time as she plots a date between him and one of her gay friends in a village not far from Konoha. So close, yet so far away.
