Chapter 17

"...so everybody, just go and die."

Rei was jolted fully awake at the utterance of those words from the kitchen. She had heard the crash of the table and cups, but in her previous drowsy state had attributed the noise to the television. As she got to her feet, memories flooding her head and freezing her blood, Pen-Pen was bowled over by her leg as he tried to get the girl's attention with alarmed-sounding squawks.

She didn't need to speak his language to know that something terrible was happening.

Mumbling an apology to the startled avian, who was pointing frantically at the kitchen and more concerned about what was happening there than any physical injury, Rei dashed through the doorway to be confronted with her worst fear. Shinji had a feebly struggling Asuka pinned against the fridge, the girl's toes barely touching the ground.

Rei stared in horror as Asuka's upraised arm dropped limply to her side, until something in the shadow of the fridge next to the dangling limb caught the blue-haired girl's eye and drove her forward.

The broom smacked into the back of Shinji's knees, collapsing his legs and dropping the boy to the ground. Asuka stayed on her feet for a moment longer, before roughly sliding down the fridge door to land harshly on her rear. She immediately began to cough and sputter as fresh air filled her lungs, and a hastily thrown out arm was all that prevented her body from falling sideways.

Realising that the redhead was the more injured of the two teenagers, Rei carelessly tossed the broom aside and knelt down next to Asuka, gently prying a hand away from the girl's throat with one hand while straightening her head with the other.

"It's alright Asuka, let me have a look," Rei hurriedly said, gazing into Asuka's wide eyes. The redhead gulped and struggled to speak, but only a hissing squeak left her mouth. "Don't try to talk. Just relax, and breathe slowly and deeply. Shinji is okay," she added as Asuka glanced past her shoulder. Rei felt a hint of satisfaction at the brief moment of worry in the redhead's eyes that evaporated at those three comforting words.

Rei exhaled in relief as she examined Asuka's neck as best as she could. She found herself suddenly thankful that her brother was in such a poor condition. If he still had the physical strength he possessed from his months of Evangelion training... she would have had to endure the gruesome sound of a neck being snapped, a life being snuffed out like a candle.

Again. Rei thrust that disturbing thought aside and returned her attention to Asuka.

The marks from Shinji's hands on her throat were faint, and would likely disappear by morning. The memory of the attack, on the other hand, would take much longer to fade away. Satisfied that there appeared to be no lasting damage, Rei turned and looked at Shinji, who had curled into a foetal position and was now shaking like a wind-blown tree.

Asuka slid herself forward slightly, and looked at the boy's face. While he was still breathing fast and heavily the madness was gone, replaced by fear in his cobalt eyes. Her own eyes closed slightly and her head drooped, before she leaned back against the fridge. When Rei turned back to face her, Asuka brought a hand to her mouth and mimed drinking, getting a nod from the other girl who stood up and ran the tap.

A glass of water was handed to Asuka, who began to greedily gulp it down until a searing pain in her throat almost immediately made her cough the water up all over herself. A pale hand grabbed the arm holding the glass.

"Slowly," came the calm instruction. Asuka nodded, and began to drink again. The cool liquid flowing down her throat served to ease the pain, and when the glass was finished she handed it to Rei, only to be given a full glass back after a moment.

After finishing half of the second glass, Asuka set it down next to her and hoarsely said, "Thanks, Wondergirl."

Rei frowned. "You should not speak. Your throat may be damaged."

"'m fine," Asuka rasped, before coughing and wincing at the jolt of pain. "Not like I haven't been strangled before." Rei raised a shocked eyebrow at this, but Asuka waved off her unspoken question and asked one of her own instead. "I don't suppose you know what the hell that was all about, do you?"

Rei's immediate turn of the head towards Shinji at the question was as good as any answer.

"Spill it."

"I-I do not know if I should," Rei hesitantly said.

Asuka finished the glass of water before replying testily. "He just tried to kill me. I think I deserve to know."

Rei looked helplessly towards Shinji, before sighing in defeat and saying, "Do you remember me telling you, when we were leaving NERV the day after my return, about the four major events that led to Shinji initiating Third Impact?"

The redhead nodded. "Misato and I dying, and two 'private matters'," she said, bringing up her arms to make finger quotes.

"What just happened was Shinji reliving the final event."

Finally feeling recovered enough to stand, Asuka got up and moved over to Shinji, pulling the boy up by his shoulders and moving him into the inside corner of the kitchen counter to keep him vertical. "I would have remembered him strangling me before." Asuka sat down next to Shinji and rubbed her neck, remembering awakening to those familiar hands around her throat. "Well, before I woke up on the beach."

Rei shook her head. "No, you were not the victim. But at the same time, you were."

Asuka glared at the bluenette. "Wondergirl, it's late and you're not making sense. Fix that."

With what looked like an extreme amount of reluctance, Rei moved to sit in front of the other two pilots. "Alright. I will tell you what Shinji experienced in the moments before Third Impact. But I must warn you, it will be disturbing." The blue-haired girl shuddered. "Ever since my separation from Lilith, my mind has occasionally insisted on recalling that memory."

And so Rei told Asuka of the time when Shinji had begged for her help, only to be coldly refused.

"M-mein Gott..."

Rei bowed her head in apology. "I am sorry you had to hear that, Asuka. If not for your insistence, I would have never told you."

"He... he wanted my help. I was his last hope. And all I did was push him away again..."

"That was not you," Rei was quick to say. "You could not have done anything. It was the Asuka in Shinji's mind that said those words."

"That doesn't matter!" Asuka's voice was starting to return to normal, but she still coughed roughly as she raised her voice. "My attitude, my actions towards Shinji gave him that impression! I'm just as guilty!" The girl turned to the boy next to her and threw her arms around his shoulders, hugging him fiercely to her. "I'm sorry. Shinji, I'm so sorry..." Though there was no response, his shaking subsided as their proximity relaxed Shinji's body.

Rei tried to place a hand on her shoulder, but it was instantly shaken off. She sighed and sat back on her haunches. "You must not blame yourself. You were as harshly shaped by your past as he was. Any fault lies with those who sought to bring about Instrumentality: Gendo Ikari and the men of SEELE."

In Asuka's arms, Shinji's body had stilled completely and his breathing began to slow down from it's near-hyperventilation state, but she didn't move from her position. She knew that, ultimately, the First Child was correct. The upbringing of both the Second and Third Child had been specifically tailored to meet SEELE's demands for a sacrifice and a trigger. That didn't make it any easier to swallow. Asuka had always believed that she would shape her own future, not have it decided for her.

But destiny was clearly a bitch.

"Rei..." Asuka eventually said. "Misato can't know about this."

Rei tilted her head slightly. "Why not? She will at least want to know why the cups and chair are broken. And perhaps the marks on your neck, if they don't disappear in time."

"Because she'll be forced to act. Misato might be able to pretend some things in our lives don't happen, like how we snipe at each other, but her wards actually attacking one another?"

Rei's mouth opened in an O of understanding. "Even the Commander of NERV would be unable to ignore something of this magnitude."

"Mmhm," Asuka hummed in agreement. "Shinji would be locked up, chained to a bed. How would that make you feel, to know your brother is practically imprisoned for something beyond his control?"

"Upset," Rei answered instantly. "Confused, angry perhaps. I would be distracted. I might even lose control again."

"Exactly."

Rei stood up, and began righting the table and chairs, placing the broken one out of the way. "I understand what you are saying. While part of me believes you are once more exaggerating into a worst case scenario, the rest has no desire to take that risk. Shinji is important to me. To us. I will keep this secret until you decide otherwise."

"Then we're in agreement. Don't worry about the kitchen, I'll make something up for Misato tomorrow morning." Asuka yawned into Shinji's shoulder as a brief clatter of pottery marked the disposal of the broken cups into the rubbish bin.

"Wark?"

The two girls turned at the noise, to see Pen-Pen's head sticking through the doorway. He ducked back slightly at the attention, before realising that the disturbance was over.

"It's okay, Pen-Pen. Everything's under control now," Asuka called out. The genetically-modified penguin breathed a sigh of relief, an almost comical act coming from a bird, and waddled into the kitchen. Before he was halfway to his fridge, Rei picked him up and hugged the penguin to her chest.

"I am sorry for injuring you," she apologised. "Are you alright?" Pen-Pen worked a flipper free of the embrace and patted the girl on the shoulder, to which Rei smiled. Asuka too, found the corners of her mouth twitching upward at the scene.

"I will also keep this a secret." At Asuka's confused look, Rei pointed at her and Shinji while cradling Pen-Pen in one arm. "Whatever your feelings are for my brother, they are your feelings. Misato will not know of them either."

Asuka wobbled slightly as she got to her feet. "Uh, thanks?" she replied. "So... you trust me with him now, do you?"

"I have seen enough of your actions this past week, and looked into your eyes to see the truth. I am no longer afraid for Shinji's safety when he is with you."

The redhead froze in the act of reaching down to the boy at her feet. "...what would you have done if something did happen?" she asked hesitantly as she looked over her shoulder.

"They would never find your body." The chill Asuka felt from the immediate answer was lessened somewhat by the smile on Rei's face, which quickly disappeared as she placed Pen-Pen on the ground and walked up the hallway to her room.

There was silence in the kitchen, as both redheads stared after the girl. After a moment Asuka looked down at the avian and said, "This goes for you too, bird-brain. Not a word to Misato."

To Asuka's surprise, Pen-Pen was not taken aback at the menacing words. Instead, he moved across the kitchen to stop directly in front of Asuka. He pointed one flipper at Shinji, then the other at Asuka. Bringing the second flipper up, he drew it slowly and deliberately across his throat before pointing at the stunned girl once more. "Wark," he ominously squawked before waddling into his fridge and shutting the door perhaps a little harder than necessary.

The second the fridge closed, Asuka began softly laughing, and even her sore throat couldn't stop her. After everything that had just happened, an overly-protective penguin threatening her was just what she needed to go to bed in a good mood.


If there was one thing that would never change in Asuka's life, it was that she loathed being rudely awoken before the sun had even begun to think about peeking over the horizon. The tossing and turning of her roommate had been the culprit, and she almost had to stifle a surprised shriek when her eyes opened to reveal Shinji's face a few centimetres away from hers. The curses died in her throat as she realised the source of the interruption.

Asuka remained awake for a while, simply staring at the sleeping boy next to her and wondering when the troubled look he used to have while sleeping had seemingly increased in intensity. Was it when he had been moved into her room, or was it simply because of the previous night? Whatever the case, her hand automatically reached for his when Shinji began to shake in his sleep, and Asuka quickly fell asleep again with the reassuring warmth of the Third Child's hand in hers.

She would have to find some way of thanking Shinji for letting her sleep well for so many nights in a row.

That would have to come at a later date, however. Another interruption to her beauty sleep was even now standing above her with arms folded and a disapproving frown on her face.

"Do you mind telling me why one of my chairs is broken, young lady?" Misato asked.

"Wstfgl," was Asuka's eloquent reply. She shook her head to clear the cobwebs and tried again, but not before glancing down and making sure her blanket was covering her neck. "What the hell kind of time do you call this? Couldn't it wait until it's actually morning?"

"I need to have a meeting with some of the U.N. members, and the only available timeslot is in a couple of hours, so I need to get ready now. Now stop changing the subject and explain what happened."

Asuka's face fell. She had been hoping for more time to come up with a reasonable explanation, but the rude awakening after not enough time asleep had short-circuited her lying sub-routine.

"Well, I-" she managed before a soft voice intruded.

"It was my fault," Rei lied smoothly from the hallway. Misato turned around in surprise, and managed to miss the look of shock on Asuka's face. "I was tired, and tripped over Pen-Pen. Some cups were also broken in my fall." She bowed before the stunned woman. "I am sorry, Misato. I shall pay for replacements."

"...Oh," Misato lamely replied. She shook herself and rallied. "Are you and Pen-Pen okay?"

"I am uninjured, and Pen-Pen was more upset with me than hurt."

"Well... that's alright I suppose." Misato scratched her head. Something didn't add up here, but she didn't have the luxury of time to examine closer. "Why are you up so early anyway?"

"You were not very quiet, and I am a light sleeper."

"...Oh," Misato said again. "Er, sorry." She began to walk out of Asuka's bedroom and down the hallway, but stopped near the kitchen. "Oh yes. We need to get you two back to training before the next Revenant appears. Rei, would you be willing to participate in an activation test?"

"How soon?"

"If you agree, we'll start preparations immediately, and I'll get Section Two to pick you three up when we're nearly ready. We may as well do a sync test with Asuka while we're at it."

Rei glanced into the room at Asuka, who looked back and nodded. "Yes, I will," she said to Misato.

Their guardian smiled. "As I said to Asuka, I will never force anyone into an Eva against their will, so thank you. Now go back to sleep, you two. Oh, and I won't be back for dinner either, so don't make anything for me tonight."

With a wave, Misato went back into her room to get changed.

"Huh..." Asuka said, sitting up as soon as she heard the door close. "You actually covered for me, First. I didn't even know you were capable of lying like that."

Rei smiled. After spending nearly a week living with the girl, Asuka no longer found it surprising to see Rei actually express emotions. "I believe Misato has known you long enough to be able to sense deceit. Conversely, she is not as familiar with me."

"Thank god for that, I had nothing."

The First Child nodded, and was about to turn and leave, when she noticed something odd. "Have you always slept that close to my brother?"

Asuka looked down. Shinji's face had been close to hers when she woke up in the middle of the night, but at the time she had merely thought he had twisted himself closer. Now with the light from the hallway, she could see that their futons were almost touching each other. Asuka blushed slightly as she explained what had happened. "I wish I knew why he fears me so much, but still gets comforted by me whenever his demons attack," she added.

The two girls thought for a moment before Rei answered, "It is only a theory, but I believe that while Shinji's mind equates you with fear, his heart does not." Before Asuka could even begin to stammer, Rei turned out the hallway light before returning to her bedroom.

The redhead stared into the pitch blackness surrounding her. A faint whisper eventually broke the silence.

"His... heart..."


When morning finally dawned, Shinji had migrated back towards his 'normal' sleeping position, to Asuka's slight disappointment. Going back to sleep with the boy's face so close to hers had suffused her cheeks with colour at the thought that he was so close that a minor shift of her neck would bring his mouth in range for...

In the dim light filtering through the curtains, Asuka kicked that thought out of her head as she sat up and tried to ignore the warmth in her face. It would take more than close proximity to make Asuka Langley-Soryu suddenly kiss Shinji Ikari.

'Like being 'bored'?'

Asuka frowned. 'Even if I had a reason to, I wouldn't kiss him. Not until he was lucid.'

'But who would know?'

'I would!' Asuka screamed internally. It was too early to have another argument with herself, so she threw the covers of her futon back and stood up to open the curtains. The athletic young girl stretched the kinks out of her body in the light of a new day.

When her body was finally feeling limber, Asuka moved over to her dresser. The new mirror was not quite the same size as the one she had broken in her despair-driven frenzy, but enough adhesive had solved that minor problem. She leaned forward and critically examined her neck, pulling her hair out of the way for a better look. To her quiet surprise, all evidence of the previous night had vanished, and Asuka smiled in relief.

At the end of her examination, Asuka let her hair go, watching in the mirror as it cascaded downward like a brilliant orange waterfall. Her hair was now past the midpoint of her back, but still not quite long enough to emulate her mother's style. The problem with her plan now was that LCL made hair washing an arduous chore, and she was grudgingly considering getting it trimmed while she was still needed as a pilot.

Asuka smiled as she remembered a time back when she was a little girl, when she had tried to hide behind her mother's hair while playing a game. She couldn't remember who she had been hiding from, though. A friend? A relative?

A movement in the corner of the mirror caught her eye. "Morning, Rei," she called over her shoulder.

"Good morning, Asuka," Rei greeted from the doorway, already dressed for the day. "Did you sleep well?"

"Apart from being interrupted, yeah. The marks on my neck are gone too."

"That is good to hear. Will you be making anything for breakfast?"

Asuka turned away from the mirror and shook her head. "Eh, heavy meals and Eva piloting don't mix well, so we should just have something light for now. We can make up for it by having a big lunch after we're done."

"A wise decision," Rei replied, before heading to the bathroom. Asuka returned to the mirror and ran a brush through her hair, removing the knots that had built up during the night.

When the call from NERV came, Rei and Asuka -towing Shinji as usual- headed outside to find the Section Two agents already waiting for them. They did not speak, instead gesturing for the girls to proceed. The entire trip was made in silence, and Asuka wondered if the agents were ordered not to talk or whether they simply had nothing worth saying.

"Good to see you, kids," Misato said when they reported to her, looking up from what she had been discussing with Ritsuko in her office.

Asuka nodded in greeting. "So what's happening first? My sync test or Rei's activation?"

"We'll do your test first, Asuka," Ritsuko answered. "No offence, Rei, but I want to have her on standby in case of any problem with your activation."

"No offence was taken, Doctor Akagi. Unit-00 has... rarely responded kindly to the tests." Rei looked sidelong at her fellow pilot. "I trust Asuka to subdue my Evangelion if something happens."

"Nice to hear that," Misato said with a smile. "Hopefully it won't come to that, but after what happened with Unit-01 I'd rather not take any chances with our two more... unruly Evas."

"That's what you get for sticking with old hardware," Asuka said, a weak grin on her face.

With a groan and a mock glare, Misato dismissed the bad joke with a wave and said, "I don't think Rei would appreciate a simple hardware fault as a reason for getting hurt. Now get out of here and into your plugsuits!"

After they left, Misato asked, "How are we looking with Unit-00 anyway? Do you think there'll be any problems?"

"I hope not. Giant rampaging robots are expensive to clean up after," Ritsuko replied. "I'm just wondering if it will accept Rei as she is now."

"What about the soul inside it? Asuka said that her mother isn't in there anymore, but is the same true of the other two Evas?"

"We'll soon find out about Unit-00, but until Shinji recovers we can only speculate on Yui's whereabouts."

"True. Oh, speaking of which, did you ever get around to finishing up with Shinji's scans inside Unit-01?"

For a moment the sudden change of topic confused Ritsuko, until she ran the last sentence through her head again. "Oh. Yes. Right. Er..." She rubbed the back of her head. "I plugged the data into the MAGI, but then the Revenant attacked. We were so busy picking up the pieces after that, I kind of forgot about it."

"What kind of scientist are you, to forget to check up on your own research?"

Ritsuko sighed and flopped back into her chair. "A tired one. Ask me again after today's tests, that will give me time to make sense of the results."

The two commanders returned to work. The amount of preparation they had to deal with meant it took fifteen minutes to realise something. "Crap," Misato swore. "They forgot to leave Shinji with me."


"Crap, we forgot to leave Shinji with Misato," Asuka muttered as the trio stopped in the hallway leading towards the changing rooms.

"Would you like me to take him with me when I go to the bridge?" suggested Rei.

"Well there's no point heading back now," Asuka sighed. "Do it when when we split up at the Eva cages."

When they reached the changing rooms, the two girls started putting on their plugsuits, while Shinji sat on the end of a bench, facing the wall.

"What did you mean last night, when you said you had been strangled before?" Rei asked, breaking the silence.

On the other side of the lockers, the question froze Asuka in place with one leg in her plugsuit. Terrible memories resurfaced, as they often did.

'Please, Asuka. Die with me.'

'If that's what you want, I'll die with you, mama. Just don't stop being my mama! Mama! Mama!'

'Mama? Who are you?'

But now they were held off by a much more important one, and Asuka drew strength from it.

'You are Asuka Langley Soryu. My daughter. Not even Third Impact can change that. And there's something else that will never change. I am so proud of you, Asuka, and I will always love you.'

After waiting for Asuka's reply and getting nothing, Rei said, "If you do not wish to speak of it, I will-"

"My mother, or... the thing that looked like her after the Contact Experiment, tried to kill me," Asuka woodenly replied as she resumed dressing. "I can't remember how I managed to break free. Not long after that was when she hung herself next to that... doll." She spat the last word like a curse.

"I-I am so-"

"Don't. Say it," Asuka slowly and exasperatedly said before the other girl could finish. Though Rei couldn't see it, Asuka gestured in the direction of Shinji while she continued. "It's easy to see the similarities between you and him sometimes. You both apologise for things that you shouldn't."

Rei couldn't stop the words coming if she tried. "I'm sorry."

"Oh my god! You're exactly like him!" Asuka palmed her face in frustration, and rubbed two fingers against her forehead. The dredged up memories were now struggling for dominance, and she felt something akin to a headache approaching. Rather than risk upsetting her further, Rei chose to return her attention to her plugsuit.


"I know you do not need luck for something like this," Rei said as Asuka walked up the gantry towards her entry plug. Her own Eva was in transit to the testing cage. "But..."

"Yeah." Asuka nodded, staring into the green eyes of her Evangelion. "I get what you're trying to say, and the sentiment is appreciated. Just make sure that your Eva doesn't go nuts and we'll be fine. I'd rather not have to take down another one." She turned around. "Although I-... Wait, where's Shinji?"

The two girls frantically looked around, but the brown-haired boy was nowhere to be seen in Unit-02's holding pen.

"Damnit, did he wander off somewhere? He could be anywhere in NERV now, the idiot!" Asuka punched the railing in anger.

Rei bristled slightly at the insult to her brother. "Calm down. I will retrace our steps and attempt to locate him. You should get into your Eva and prepare for your test."

"Like hell I will!" Asuka retorted. "You think I'll be able to concentrate with him missing like this?"

An amplified voice filled the cage. "Asuka, we're ready to begin. What's the hold-up?"

The two pilots looked towards the back wall of the cage, where Misato and Ritsuko could be seen in the control room hanging over Unit-02.

"Shinji's disappeared and we don't know where he might have gone," Asuka called out.

Despite it not being picked up by the P.A. system, Asuka could almost hear the curse uttered by Misato. The woman turned away and shouted an order at a subordinate. A minute later Ritsuko said, "The MAGI have found him, he's in Unit-01's cage. Get over there, he shouldn't be allowed to get into his Eva in the state he's in!"

Asuka took off running the second Ritsuko mentioned the purple Evangelion's cage as Shinji's location, Rei close on her heels.

"I knew I shouldn't have let go of him," Asuka muttered as she ran through the blast door sitting between Cage Two and Three. She skidded to a halt on the catwalk after passing the doorway.

Fortunately for everybody, Shinji was nowhere near the entry plug. Instead he was standing on the catwalk in front of Unit-01, staring up into its face. As the girls drew closer, they could hear him mumbling, "...my father's work?" before looking up at the empty control room overhead.

It only took Rei a second to figure out what Shinji was remembering. "It is the day he first came to NERV and met his-."

"Father..." Shinji gasped, unintentionally finishing Rei's sentence before looking away.

Misato's voice came through over the P.A. system once more. "Did you find him?"

"Yeah, it's fine. Just a memory," Asuka replied. To Rei, she said, "Why does it have to be another bad one? Aren't there any good memories in that head of his?"

Rei declined to comment, and Asuka grimly realised the answer to that question quickly.

In front of them, Shinji stood silent for a short time while the conversation in his own head went on without him. Eventually, he spoke again. "Why did... you send for me?... So, you're asking me to take this thing and go out there and fight?"

Asuka struggled to keep calm as the boy spoke. Already she could hear the pain in Shinji's voice as he argued with his mind's image of Gendo Ikari.

'The first time Shinji sees his father in years, and it's to be told that he's just a tool,' Asuka thought, frowning as the one-sided conversation continued. The rubber of her plugsuit squeaked as her fists clenched. When Shinji's face fell at whatever Gendo had said to dismiss him, she growled, "If the bastard ever leaves Instrumentality, I don't care what he is to you and Shinji, I'm beating the crap out of him."

"If that day ever comes, I shall endeavour to be elsewhere," was Rei's impassive reply. She too felt her gorge rising as she remembered the part she had unwittingly played that day. Being wheeled out on a gurney as blackmail in order to force Shinji's hand, and having her injuries become exacerbated by both the movement and the shockwave from the Angel attack knocking her off the gurney. She explained this to Asuka as the redhead wondered why Shinji had suddenly fallen backwards.

The distraction caused by her exposition earned Rei her second fall onto the catwalk as Shinji barrelled into her, narrowly missing Asuka. In a remarkable coincidence, she landed precisely where Shinji knelt down, and was once more held gently in his arms. Apart from the aches of landing on the metal flooring, she was uninjured this time, and so could look into the boy's eyes.

The first time she had been in this situation, Rei had only briefly been able to see Shinji before she was placed back on the gurney and wheeled away, but it had been enough time to see his concern. Now that she had the opportunity -and both eyes- to stare, she did so.

Concern poured off of Shinji as he remembered the past. Or perhaps that was merely his body heat slowly leeching through Rei's plugsuit. Whatever the case, Rei once more felt warmth and safety emanating from the boy. The feeling that he would do everything in his power to protect her despite knowing her for only a few seconds.

Asuka knelt down next to them. "You okay?" she asked. "You hit the ground pretty hard."

"I am alright," Rei replied, keeping her eyes on Shinji. "This does not even come close to the pain I have felt in the past."

"I'll, uh... take your word for that. The memory appears to be over anyway."

Shinji had frozen in place, a hand hovering in front of his face and his eyes glazing over once more. Rei could swear that the warmth she had felt was slowly draining away, and she gingerly removed herself from Shinji's arms and stood up with a sigh. "I shall take him to Misato now," she said, sadness creeping in at the edge of her voice.

Asuka watched them leave, focusing on the back of Shinji's head. "What will it take," she quietly wondered, "to bring you back to m-... us?" She didn't move back to Unit-02 until the blast door closed and cut off her view of the tortured boy, and she sadly whispered, "What more can I do...?"


"Can you concentrate please, Asuka?" came the stern request from Ritsuko. "You're down to 42%, and I know you can do much better."

The pilot of Unit-02 was too distracted by her thoughts to comment.

'I've been looking after Shinji for six months, comforting him whenever his nightmares become too much. The only thing that even cracked his shell was getting into Unit-01. What am I doing wrong? The one time he interacts with me and he tries to kill me while remembering Third Impact...'

"Asuka?"

"What?!" she snarled, before realising who was speaking to her. "Oh, sorry Misato."

The purple-haired commander stared back at her through the comm window. With a sigh, she gently pushed a fussing Ritsuko aside and leaned closer. "Okay, let's pause the test for a moment. Something's clearly on your mind, Asuka."

"I'm fine," Asuka retorted shortly.

"Obviously not, if you're nearly dropping below 40% sync and not even caring."

The girl blinked in surprise. "Forty..." she repeated, then shook her head. "Alright alright, I'm thinking about Shinji."

To Asuka's mild astonishment, her guardian did not seize that opportunity to rib her. Instead, Misato asked, "What happened in the cage?"

"Shinji remembered the day he first saw Unit-01... and his father. Rei told me what she could of what happened."

"I see. Did she also tell you of how casually his father almost threw him away again?"

"She didn't need to. Shinji's body language was enough to make me vow to beat that asshole father of his into paste if he returned."

"Hah!" came the humourless laugh from Ritsuko, standing slightly off-screen. "Sorry, but you'll have to get in line. Practically everyone at NERV, if not the whole world, is going to want a piece of him."

Misato nodded in agreement with her Sub-Commander. "Look, Asuka. I know you're doing your best at looking after Shinji," she reassured the girl. "I believe that placing him in your care will work much better than the best psychologist in the world. Don't be discouraged by what looks like failure. Just by being with him and comforting him, you are doing your job. Never forget that."

Asuka's spirits lifted slightly, yet she still found herself asking, "But why do I constantly feel like I could be doing more for him?"

Misato grinned. "I won't repeat what I said to you a long time ago in the examination room."

The girl flushed slightly, which was fortunately covered up by the liquid surrounding her. "Y-yeah, I remember."

"Good. Feel better enough to try the test again?" Misato asked hopefully.

In response, Asuka leaned forward and grasped the reins of Unit-02 tightly. "Yeah, thanks Misato."

"Thank me by getting to... let's say 55%."

Unfortunately, Asuka only made it to 51% before Ritsuko concluded the test. Misato waved it off, but the failure would eat away at the Second Child for the rest of the day.


The fresh blue paint on the giant bio-mechanical creation shone in the harsh lights of the testing chamber. Just as Asuka did with Unit-02, Rei stared into the cyclopean red eye of her Evangelion, alone on the catwalk.

"Will you accept me as I am now?" she softly whispered. "Have I changed too much?" Predictably, the behemoth remained silent. Her head drooped and she closed her eyes. "I suppose we shall soon find out," she said, a small smile gracing her lips.

Rei climbed into the entry plug and settled into the chair as the cylindrical cockpit slid into place inside Unit-00. The moment it locked into place, a comm window opened to her left.

"Ready to start, Rei?" Misato asked.

"Affirmative, Commander."

"Good. Just remember that we're not expecting miracles. We'll be happy if you can sync, but if not we will make do. Asuka, are you ready?"

"In position," replied Asuka in a subdued tone. Rei glanced at the new comm window, and saw that her fellow pilot was looking somewhat downcast. She was about to switch to a private channel and talk to Asuka, when the order came through. It would just have to wait until later.

"Begin activation test!" Misato's call came, and the bridge crew leapt to action.

"Connecting main power."

"All circuits transmitting."

"Connecting secondary contact."

"A10-nerve connection normal."

Rei felt the familiar sensation as her A-10 connectors came to life for the first time in over half a year.

"Configure language interface for Japanese."

"All preliminary contacts established, performance nominal."

The voices of the bridge crew faded away as Rei closed her eyes and prepared for the mental strain she always had to go through. Whereas the other two pilots only had to open their hearts to their Evangelions, Rei had to battle with the soul inside hers in order to bend the recalcitrant machine to her will.

She didn't always win. Not long before the arrival of the Third Angel, Unit-00 had seemingly attempted to kill her by explosively ejecting the entry plug in a confined space.

As she felt herself sink 'downwards' towards the Evangelion's core and the soul it contained, Rei felt a sense of wrongness. There was something different about Unit-00. She opened her eyes, and saw only blackness.

Before she could begin to wonder at the absence of the soul, a hand stretched out of the darkness and tapped her on the shoulder. Rei whirled around to see...

Herself.

"It's good to see you again, my child," the apparition said.

"...Lilith?" Rei wondered, wide-eyed.

"Almost. Just a fragment of her. Have a seat." The other girl waved her hand, and a couple of simple chairs appeared between them.

"What are you doing here?" Rei asked, narrowing her eyes in suspicion.

Pausing in the act of sitting down, the apparition said, "I'm attempting to put you at ease. Sit down, please."

With a frown, Rei took the other seat. "No, I mean what are you doing inside Unit-00?"

"I am now the soul inside Unit-00. The original being that inhabited this beast has returned to where it belongs," the other girl explained. "Have you not noticed that you hold memories of all three of your incarnations?"

The frown deepened. "I do, but I admit that I had not thought much of it, believing that y-... Lilith had simply gifted those memories to me."

"In a sense, that's correct. It would be more true to say that their lives were gifted to you. Everything that they once were is now within you."

Rei raised a clenched hand to her chest. "I see..." She looked up. "But what does that make me?"

The fragment of Lilith smiled. "You are Rei Ayanami," she said simply. "No more, no less." She leaned forward. "Now then, I suppose I should let you go. I knew you would come here attempting to subdue the previous occupant, and took that moment to meet you face to face."

"Wait!" Rei exclaimed. "You, or rather Lilith, fragmented your soul in order to power Unit-00. Did you do the same for the other two Evangelions?"

"Only for yours. I was able to convince Adam to give a piece of his soul to Unit-02. Just enough to replace Asuka's mother. Since your fellow pilot doesn't have the... connection you and I share, she would likely not have met him like this."

"No, I remember her saying that Unit-02 felt cold and empty."

"Ah, just like him to be rude. It was difficult enough getting him to agree, I had to appeal to his own sense of fair play." The apparition smiled again. "After all, he was the one who rescued Asuka, claiming that he didn't want to win by default with the loss of both the Second and Third Children."

The smile faded, and the fragment of Lilith sighed. "As for Unit-01... I'm afraid I don't know who or what is in there. My initial attempt to insert a fragment was repelled."

Rei sharply inhaled. "It was blocked? By... Yui Ikari?"

"It is only a guess, based on the fact that I was not able to find her in Instrumentality. I did not wish to force my way in and risk damage or injury to the occupant or to the Evangelion, and so I left Unit-01 alone."

"Bi-directional circuits are open. Synchronisation ratio at 42%."

Both girls looked up as the voices of the bridge crew were heard. "You should go. They may suspect a problem if you do not respond soon. Since I will likely not see you again, I will take this opportunity to wish you good luck in the battle against Adam's Revenants."

"Thank you," Rei said as she stood up and bowed. "With your help, our chances of succeeding are much greater." Without a second glance backwards, she drifted away from the still-seated soul.

And opened her eyes.

"Harmonics normal, no problems detected."

"Evangelion Unit-00 has activated."


After their tests, the two pilots quickly showered and changed before returning to the Commander's office. Ritsuko wisely decided to make herself absent as Misato debriefed Rei after the successful activation test. She could sense that her presence would not be welcome yet, going by the sullen looks thrown her way whenever she spoke.

"Well done, Rei," Misato said. "Not only did you manage to activate Unit-00 with no problems, you also achieved possibly your best sync ratio ever."

"Thank you, Commander," replied Rei.

"Hmph, looks like you didn't need me after all," Asuka gloomily said, one elbow resting on Misato's desk with her chin in her hand, and her other hand clutching Shinji's. She was currently staring at nothing, and so missed the glance between Misato and Rei at her behaviour.

"...Anyway, so we now have two fully functional Evangelions and two great pilots to work with," Misato continued. "Although I'm not sure whether to trust the fact that one of them has a soul fragment belonging to our enemy."

"Commander, if you do not know whether to trust Unit-02, then trust me... and Lilith," Rei answered reassuringly. "From what her fragment told me, Adam will not stoop to such treachery, as he wishes for a fair test of our might against his."

"We went through that crap already though!" Asuka exclaimed. "Or was all of last year pointless?"

"It could be said that humanity only failed due to our own treachery, though," Misato mused. "I mean, we did have both SEELE and Shinji's father working to bring about our demise."

Only Asuka noticed the barest hint of a twitch in Shinji's face at the mention of the elder Ikari. She squeezed his hand tighter and slipped back into her native tongue as she muttered, "Aasbande..." hatefully under her breath.

"I don't know what you just said, Asuka, but I agree with whatever it was. Anyway, we need to get you two into some combat training sims soon. It's anyone's guess when the next Revenant will attack, and I want you two working well together."

Asuka merely mumbled noncommittally, while Rei replied, "I will do my best to keep up with Asuka."

"Good. Now-"

Asuka abruptly stood up with a clatter as her chair fell over, pulling Shinji out of his own seat.

"What's wrong, Asuka?" Misato queried, crooking an eyebrow. "I know you're unhappy about Shinji's progress, but today you've been acting like he's dropped back into a coma."

"Just leave me alone, I'm fine!"Asuka almost yelled, before stomping out of the office with Shinji in tow, throwing a glare at Misato's secretary on her way as if the woman had attempted to stop her exit.

"Asu-... damnit. I really hate this job sometimes," Misato complained as she slumped back into her chair after her failed attempt to call the angry girl back. "Everything's fine, just shut the door please," she said to her secretary, who had poked her head into the room to see if anything was wrong.

"Will she be alright?" asked Rei when the secretary departed.

"I don't know, Rei. Asuka seems to think that it's her fault for Shinji not recovering."

"But if it were not for her, my brother might still be catatonic," Rei said uncertainly.

"You know that, I know that, and Asuka knows that." Misato sat up and leaned forward on the desk. "Do you know if something happened to her? She seemed fine yesterday."

Rei hesitated, eyes darting to the door through which Asuka had left, and Misato noticed. "Please, tell me. I might be able to help."

'Misato can't know about this.' The conversation from the night before ran through Rei's mind. 'Because she'll be forced to act.' She took a deep breath, looked Misato in the eyes, and chose to honour Asuka's wishes. "It was nothing major. Shinji remembered something, and it upset Asuka."

"Do you know what it was?"

Rei shook her head. "I do not," she said shortly. "Is there anything else you wish to speak to me about, Commander?"

Misato blinked at the sudden change of subject, but decided to go along with it. "No, nothing else Rei. Dismissed," she said with a sigh.

"Then I shall go and locate Asuka, and see if there is something I can do to improve her mood."

"Careful. You're close to her sync ratio. She might bite your head off."

Rei nodded and saluted before leaving the office. As soon as she had left the area, Misato told her secretary to request Ritsuko's presence in her office.


It took Rei almost half an hour to locate Asuka. Enquiries with passing NERV staff eventually directed her towards a seldom-used stairwell. From the sound of mumbled German she could hear from the other side of the door, Rei knew she had found the right place. She pushed the door open as quietly as she could and stepped through.

Asuka and Shinji were sitting underneath the staircase, apparently hiding away from any passersby. While she was not facing the door, Asuka somehow knew when Rei was close, as she sarcastically said, "Took you long enough," when the other girl got close. "Let me guess, you're going to ask if I'm okay."

Rei said nothing, and instead sat down on the dusty floor next to Asuka.

"Yeah, it's pretty damn obvious I suppose," Asuka continued, as if the question had been asked anyway. "After all, nobody storms out of their superior's office without a good reason."

"Misato is concerned for you," Rei finally said.

Asuka hugged her knees to her chest. "I'm aware of that, First. And I just went ahead and let her down despite the pep talk she gave me."

"She does not care about your sync ratio. It is just a number."

"Yeah, a number that says how well I'm doing."

"Our results during tests have rarely been indicative of our performance in an actual combat situation."

Asuka knew how true that statement was, but still rolled her eyes and said, "I know. Doesn't make it any easier for me."

"You are blaming yourself for Shinji's lack of progress."

Asuka began to retort, but her mouth snapped shut before the first syllable could escape. "Damnit," she whispered angrily. "Why did you have to bring that up?"

"He is my brother, and you are his caretaker. I wish to assist you in any way I can."

"Assist? Assist?!" Asuka's voice rose and she jumped to her feet. "I'm the best person to rid him of his nightmares, for whatever reason! What the hell can you do?!"

Rei could not find an answer to the harsh question.

"That's what I thought." Asuka dropped heavily back onto the hard ground before laying her head on her knees and resuming her mumbling in German.

'She is right, what can I do to help?' Rei thought. 'I do not have any knowledge that would help in this situation.' She glanced sidelong at Asuka, who now had her eyes closed. 'But there must be something I can do to at least comfort and reassure her.'

A flash of inspiration struck. 'Comfort. Hikari hugged me as a means of comfort and support.' Rei turned her head to look fully at Asuka, who was in her own world. 'But I do not believe Asuka would accept a hug from me. Misato is too far away, as are our friends. That only leaves...'

"Please stand."

"Huh?" Asuka's head shot up, almost impacting on the wall of the stairwell. She saw Rei pull Shinji to his feet and sneered, "What, you want to take us somewhere? Think that'll make me feel better?"

"No. Please stand up," Rei repeated.

With an exaggerated sigh, Asuka stood up. "Fine. I'm up. Now what?"

"Please close your eyes."

"Why, so you can try to slap some sense into me?" Asuka folded her arms and shifted her weight to her back foot.

"You will not be harmed. Please close your eyes."

If someone had been at the top of the stairwell, they would have heard the annoyed groan echoing upwards. Asuka was glad she chose such a remote location. "Fine," she said, following the instruction. "Now what?"

There was no response for a moment, but Asuka could hear quiet footsteps and clothing rustle slightly. "Well?"

"Open your arms and take two steps forward."

"What the hell are you planning, Wondergirl?" Her arms remained folded as Asuka remained where she was.

"You will find out quickly."

"I'm not doing another thing until you tell me what the hell you're doing."

"It would spoil the surprise if I simply told you. If you do as I ask and do not feel better in five minutes, you may hit me without repercussion. Is that a satisfactory agreement?"

For a moment, Asuka considered opening her eyes and punching the girl anyway, but she managed to simmer down and say, "This had better damn well be worth it." Her tone indicated she held no hope in whatever Rei's solution was.

Asuka walked forward, sarcastically exaggerating each step, and her arms brushed against fabric. Before she could look at what she was walking into, Rei said, "Keep your eyes closed until I say otherwise." Asuka grit her teeth in frustration, but didn't peek.

She almost did open her eyes when she felt two cold hands grip her wrists and manoeuvre her arms into position on... somebody's back? She could certainly feel the spinal column poking slightly into her wrist. When one of the hands detached and moved to her own back, Asuka felt herself being pushed forward into a very-definitely male chest. The other hand left her wrist at the same time as the one on her back, and she quickly felt two arms encircle her.

"W-what are you doing?!" Asuka exclaimed as she felt her cheeks begin to heat up.

"You may look now."

Asuka cautiously opened her eyes, looked up slightly and saw...

Two sad and empty but still-beautiful cobalt orbs staring directly at her.

"Shinji..." Asuka whispered as she felt the heat of his body begin to merge with her own, and drive away the anger and despair she had felt all day.

"I believe it would be appropriate, in this situation, to place your head on his shoulder," came the quiet but sure voice of Rei from behind her.

Asuka was so focused on Shinji that she simply complied with Rei's suggestion, nestling her head into the crook of his neck and tightening her hold on him as she did so. She felt the boy's arms tighten in return, and decided that she didn't care if that had been Rei's doing or Shinji unconsciously reacting. Instead she simply let the boy's warmth infuse her body.

'Either Shinji's stopped slouching or he had a growth spurt when I wasn't looking. If he gets any taller I really will have to stand on my tip-toes to be at eye level,' Asuka mused.

Rei stood to one side and watched the interaction. She noticed Asuka close her eyes again and burrow her head deeper into Shinji's neck. After a minute, she smiled and silently slipped out the door. While it was quiet in this part of NERV, there were still a few personnel that attempted to enter the stairwell. These people were stopped by a serious-looking teenager who politely but firmly asked them to find an alternate route, and subtly threatened them with the attention of the Supreme Commander of NERV if they still tried to pass her.

Nobody decided to risk Commander Katsuragi's anger.

Fifteen minutes passed, until the door behind Rei was pushed open as Asuka strode through. Without turning to face the redhead, Rei asked, "Do you feel better now?"

She didn't need to turn around to sense the grin on Asuka's face.