Chapter 6 - From Universe to Universe


Barbara gasped as she looked around the new universe. Everything was made out of clay.

"Whoa, this is trippy", Brian said.

"I should say so", Stewie said. "We're in the Robot Chicken universe."

"I love Robot Chicken!" Barbara said.

They looked in front of them to see Peter and Chris sitting on the couch.

"Will you guys move?" Peter asked. "You're blocking the TV."

With no reason at all, some action figures came into the house.

"Look!" Chris said pointing. "GI Joe, Transformers, Thundercats, He-Man! Yay, those shows existed!"

"How's it feel to be on a major network for 30 seconds?" Stewie asked.

"**** you!" Chris yelled at him.

"Bye!"

Stewie pressed the button sending them to another universe.


The next universe was completely miserable. Stewie, Brian and Barbara were in Quahog, but everything was destroyed. It was as if someone nuked the town.

"My god", Stewie said. "This place looks terrible."

"Looks like Quahog was vaporized or something", Brian said.

"This isn't a universe with an alien invasion or Armageddon, is it?" Barbara asked.

"It says that in this universe, Frank Sinatra was never born, and therefore he was unable to use his influence to get Kennedy elected. So Nixon won the 1960 election and totally botched the Cuban Missile Crisis, causing World War III."

"Wow, so I guess Lee Harvey Oswald never shot Kennedy?" Brian asked.

"Nope, he shot Mayor McCheese."

"Look", Barbara said pointing to a TV that was barely working. "Footage of the shooting."

Mayor McCheese rode in a black car with one bodyguard and what looked like Jacqueline Kennedy with him. The roof was down for everyone to see them. Out of nowhere two gunshots rang out and McCheese was laying dead with the meat from his head splattered all over the car. Jacqueline got up and started eating the meat with no concern for McCheese.

"That joke's not in bad taste, right?" Brian said.

"Oh, who cares?" Stewie asked. "He's a cheeseburger!"

"Are you really breaking the fourth wall?" Barbara asked. "Whatever, can we just get out of here?"

Stewie pressed the button.


The next universe was really weird. Everything was poorly designed as if with no effort.

"Ew!" Brian said looking around. "Where are we?"

"I don't know", Stewie said. "The device can't make heads or tails with it. It's just some weird, low resolution, blocky universe."

"This looks like something a third grader would make if he was in charge of animation design", Barbara said.

"Lois, where is my supper?" Peter asked as he moved weirdly.

"Still in the oven!" Lois said with the same movements.

"Will I have it soon?"

"Quite soon!"

"Thank you!"

"You're welcome!"

Then for no reason at all everyone shouted "nyah!"

"I'm frightened", Stewie said.

"Hold me", Barbara said grabbing Brian.

"Let's go", Brian said.

Stewie quickly pressed the button eager to leave.


The next universe was nothing but countryside with fire hydrants as far as the eye can see. Brian smiled as Stewie frowned and Barbara kept a straight face.

"Love it", Brian said.

"Hate it", Stewie said.

"Meh", Barbara said.

Stewie pressed the button sending them to a similar universe. This time it was nothing but countryside and gay men wearing nothing but speedos as they held balloons with a rainbow in the sky. Stewie smiled as Brian frowned and Barbara kept a straight face.

"Love it", Stewie said.

"Hate it", Brian said.

"Meh", Barbara said.

Brian pressed the button sending them to another similar universe. This time it had elements from movies and other TV shows. There was a pirate ship sailing across the sea in the middle of a battle. A wrestling ring was sitting down the hill with two big muscled men wrestling, and loud rock music was playing in the air. Barbara smiled as Brian and Stewie frowned.

"Love it", Barbara said.

"Hate it", Brian and Stewie said.

Stewie pressed the button sending them to the real world. Stewie sat holding the controller. Brian and Barbara said sniffing the air.

"Uh, guys", Stewie said unable to move his mouth. "This feels weird."

"Hit the button", Brian said.

Stewie pressed the button sending them to a universe that looked like a black and white detailed drawing. On Brian's collar was a button that said "Liberal." Stewie wore nothing but a diaper and a sash that said 2002 and was holding a platter.

"What is this?" Brian asked. "Feel like I'm on acid or something."

"How do you know what acid's like?" Barbara said. "Are you keeping drugs from me?"

"We'll talk about it when we get home", he grumbled knowing he was in trouble.

"According to the multiverse guide, this is a universe where everything is depicted as a Washington Post political cartoon", Stewie said.

"I hate political cartoons!" Barbara moaned.

"Good lord, I'm naked!" he said noticing the diaper and sash. "And why am I holding a dinner platter that says McCain/Feingold?"

Brian started laughing leaving Barbara confused.

"That's pretty good. That's funny."

"What is?" Barbara asked. "I don't get it."

"Oh god, let's go quick", Stewie said. "Here comes an overweight cat with dollar signs for eyes and a hat that says Social Security pouring a bucket that says 'Alternative Minimum Tax' over a sad Statue of Liberty holding a democracy umbrella."

Brian laughed even harder.

"Oh, yes! That ought to wake people up!"

"Shut the **** up," Stewie frowned.

"Brian, you're confusing me," Barbara said pressing the button.


The next universe had nothing. There was absolutely nothing. The only thing there was just a white background.

"Oh, my god, now we're nowhere!" Brian said.

"Not quite, Brian", Stewie said. "This is a universe, but its only inhabitant is one really far away guy who yells compliments."

They turned around to see some guy standing in the distance.

"I like your shirt!"

"Thank you!" Stewie yelled back.

"Is that your wife, doggy?" the guy yelled. "She's very pretty."

"Thanks!" Barbara yelled back.

"This was nice," Stewie added.

Stewie pressed the button sending them off. When they reappeared they saw their house behind them.

"We did it", Brian said smiling. "We're back!"

"No, this is the universe of misleading portraiture."

Two guys picked up the cardboard that had the house painted on it and carried it away.

"Oh, wait. It's not so bad. There's the compliment guy! Hello!"

Two guys picked up the cardboard that had the compliment guy painted on It and carried it away.

"Oh, now they got all three of us!" a discouraged Stewie reprimanded before pressing the button again.


Hoster's Note: I've added Stewie's line at the end, and made an adjustment to fit in with the fanfic. I've even made a few more edits in this chapter, like how the show titles are italicized, and how both instances of "(Bleep)" are replaced with "****"; I usually do this last when censoring utterances of the F-word in my fanfics, unless some of them are rated Fiction M, like "The Secret Life of Biran: Extended and Deleted Scenes".