He crouched in front of her, studying her intently. Her heart-shaped face was pale and ashen, her hair lank and dull. Only in the very depths of her eyes did he see even an inkling of the woman he knew her to truly be although that tiny flicker of her true self seemed to wink and gutter threateningly against the full force of her depression. Of course, side by side with that bare inkling was another glint of glaringly bright ire. Aye, she was angry beyond words. The anger almost overwhelmed her depression, almost but not quite.

"Nymphadora, what do you mean by saying it's too late? You haven't been bitten. I would be able to tell if you had." He watched her steadily, waiting for an answer. He decided he would wait just as long as it took for her to speak, all night if need be. He shook himself mentally. Who was he trying to kid? He would stay just as he was, waiting, even if it took more than a month for her to speak.

Very softly, almost too softly to hear, she whispered a reply. "It's too late for me to not think about it. I made a few inquiries. Asked some vague questions of the right people to go to if someone were to wish to exact that particular form of revenge against another." He eyes lost their fury and were so blank they seemed almost dead.

"You didn't…" Remus' voice was just as soft but from shock rather than sadness and hoarse from his own growing horror. He closed his eyes against a mental image he did not wish to see but that came unbidden nonetheless. Drawing a haggard breath, he reached out to gently touch the back of one of Tonks' hands.

Despite the strength of her desire to feel his touch, Tonks jerked away and shrank even further into herself. "Don't."

"Don't what, Nymphadora? You know I would never hurt you."

The fire leaped to life in her eyes again if only momentarily. "You've done nothing but hurt me for months now. You've hurt me far worse than any bite or monthly transformation could." She tightened her hold on her folded legs. "Just leave, Remus. Leave me to my hurting alone."

He shook his head slowly. "Not until I know you have not done something so foolish as arrange an attack on yourself."

"I only inquired. I set up no arrangement."

He hated to ask but forced himself to do so. "Can I trust you to tell me the truth?"

Her reply sounded even more defeated. "I have never lied to you."

"No," he admitted, "you haven't. And you know I have never lied to you. You deserve better than me. You deserve someone who's whole, someone who can stand by your side even in the glow of a full moon."

"I don't care what you think I deserve. You're what I want. Just you, damages and danger and all. I don't shirk from dangerous situations. I'm an auror. Or have you forgotten that?

"I haven't forgotten." The ghost of a smile flickered across his lips.

"Just go."

"Are you still harboring thoughts of becoming a werewolf?"

Tonks did not answer.

Remus did not move.

They stared at each other in the darkened apartment until Tonks' extreme exhaustion finally claimed her and her eyes drooped closed. Remus waited several minutes until he was certain she was truly sleeping before rising and crossing to her bedroom to ensure there was a place for her on the bed. There wasn't. Removing the rolls of parchment and tangled pieces of laundry, he turned back the quilt and smoothed the sheets.

He returned to Tonks and gently lifted her into his arms. As he carried her to the bed, she shifted slightly in his embrace to press her face more securely against his shoulder but did not wake. She might be angry and depressed but she still instinctively trusted him.

As he made to transfer her onto her bed, he discovered himself to be locked in her arms. She had maneuvered herself in transit and snaked her arms around him. She was still sleeping but he found he could not extricate himself from her grip without risking waking her. Knowing she desperately needed the rest, he snuggled down into the softness of the mattress along with her. As soon as she released her hold on him, he would slip from the bed and leave. He fell asleep breathing in the scent of her skin and feeling her warm breath puff across his neck.

/to be continued/