Author's Note: Well. Uh.. the last chapter appears to have gotten a lot of attention. Heh. My bad for the cliffy. I was in fear of death after I posted too, not gonna lie. So here's a chapter in thanks for not hitting my with a bus. Or hanging me. Or any other means of death.
Thanks to my annonymous reviewers! I like to reply to my reviews. But since I can't for you guys, heres the thank you! As for Jennay, uh.. sorry for killing you last night. my bad. This one's for you!
Heartland:
Chapter 6: Fear
Una salus victis nullam sperare salutem
(The one safety for the vanquished is to abandon hope of safety;
Knowing there is no hope can give one the courage to fight and win)
-Unknown
Sawyer groaned, his eyes fluttering open. The first thing he noticed was the weight on top of him. It was only a moment later when he was fully aware of everything that had happened, that he noticed it was Juliet. His first fear was that the sons of bitches had killed her with that monster as he manuevered himself out of her lap and pulled her into his arms. It was the rise and fall of his chest the brought relief to him. He could feel the flood building with the relief, just thankful she hadn't been killed.
He was silently cursing Richard, Widmore and the rest of the others in his head as he stared down at her, gently tracing the outlines of fingers on Juliet's neck. Who the hell had strangled her into unconsciousness? He was going to kill them for it.
Richard watched in silence from afar now, still unsure of whether or not the monster had killed Juliet Burke. It had been a half hour since the attack, and Sawyer had finally woken up to realize what had happened. It was the first time he'd witnessed the monster give judgement upon somebody.
Sawyer frowned placing his forehead against hers and whispering. "C'mon Juliet.. wake up.." He groaned before tapping her lightly on the cheek. "Juliet.."
"James.." she muttered out, slowly opening her eyes.
"Hey.." he said quietly. "You alright..?"
Juliet remained silent at the question. In all honesty, she wasn't sure she would ever be alright again after that. Even know it hadn't actually been her sister, she would still have the memory of her sister strangling her. She would always see it again when she closed her eyes.
"Juliet.."
"I'm fine.." she mumbled, sitting up and moving away from him, out of his arms.
Sawyer narrowed his eyes, watching her carefully. He took her hand in his, frowning. "Tell me what happened."
"Nothing."
"Nothin' didn't put those bruises on your neck," he told her.
Juliet only managed to glare at him as she wrenched her hand back from him. "Just.. stay away."
Sawyer stared, slightly unsure of what to do. "What?"
Richard frowned.
"Stay away from me.." Juliet answered defiantly. "I can't do this.. can't be here.." she whispered, tears filling her eyes once more before she shook her head and forced them away.
Sawyer watched her in shock. He hadn't seen that cold, distant look on her face in years. Was she once again going to revert back to her own world, where she hid away her feelings from everything? She wouldn't be the woman he loved now if she did that. And he'd never forget realizing when he had begun falling for her.
()()FLASHBACK()()
Sawyer had only just sat down on his couch when the he heard the knock on his door. He frowned, shaking his head and putting down the book he was about to read. He was slightly surprised when he opened the door to see Juliet standing there, holding a covered up tray.
"Well.." she said, slightly embarrassed. "In all honesty, I was going to bring you dinner," she said with a shrug.
Sawyer raised an eyebrow up. "Was?"
Juliet shrugged once more. "I dropped it," she explained, removing the cover and showing him the slightly grassy plate of food. She noted his face was unreadable at first, as though he was trying to decide exactly how to respond to what she'd just showed him.
Within a minute, he started laughing. He had to admit, it had been a while since anyone had gotten him laughing so hard, and it had been a real laugh, not one of the fake ones you did to be nice. The fact she had the guts to come and admit she'd dropped the dinner she'd made him in the grass, it was priceless.
Juliet narrowed her eyes, throwing the covering back over the plate. "Its not that funny.."
"Yeah.." Sawyer said, his sides starting to ache as he laughed again. "Yeah it is."
Juliet rolled her eyes now.
Sawyer grinned at her, opening the door further and motioning her inside.
Juliet stared at him. "Why should I come in? You're just gonna laugh at me some more."
"You dropped my dinner and still brought it to me to show me, and didn't expect me to laugh?"
Silence was her only reply. But suddenly a smile simply broke through her hardened face. "Ok, ok. Fair enough," she muttered.
Sawyer grinned as she stepped inside. She was odd at times, but there was something downright likeable about her that made him find her almost.. adorable. This was one of those times. The look on her face when she admitted she dropped the dinner she made was one of the damned cutest things he'd seen from her yet. She always surprised him.
"What were you doing anyways?" she questioned.
Sawyer shrugged, a ghost of a grin still displayed on his face. "Was gonna read, but this was much more entertaining."
Juliet smirked. "Whose being a wise-ass now?" she questioned.
"Don't make me not offer to share my leftovers with you from last night," Sawyer warned, jokingly.
Juliet narrowed her eyes. "Did you cook the food?"
"Yeah."
Juliet smiled now. "Maybe I should run home."
"Hey now, that ain't funny," he said, frowning.
Juliet raised an eyebrow up at him. "I'm pretty sure I recall the last meal you cooked, going up in flames."
Sawyer recalled that as well. "Eh.." he muttered under his breath. "I was trying to impress you with my Martha Stewart skills."
Juliet laughed and shook her head. "Oh.. yes. I noticed you made flaming chicken," she told him. "That does take skill, I'm not sure Horace appreciated the flaming chicken flying out the closed window, breaking it and setting some of the grass on fire though."
Sawyer scratched the back of his head and shrugged. "Part of the performance?"
"Oh.. it was one well played out performance.." she noted with a smirk.
"Don't play cute with me.."
Juliet blinked.
"Coy.." Sawyer said suddenly.
Juliet simply smiled now. "So I'm cute?"
"No.."
Juliet raised both her eyebrows up at him now.
"Uh..that didn't come out right," Sawyer said quickly, putting his hands up.
Juliet held back the laugh she wanted to let out and kept her face serious. "Well.. I should hope not."
"Well.." Sawyer stated, running his hand though his hair. "What I meant.. I mean.. its not that you're not.." he paused, watching the amusement in her eyes. She wasn't actually offended. "Son of a bitch."
Juliet just laughed at his realization. She grinned before kissing him on the cheek. "Thanks for the offer for leftovers," she stated. "But I'm just going to go home."
Sawyer watched her in awe as she walked out, shutting the door behind her with a wink. He found his hand moving to his cheek in sudden awareness. Had she just kissed him? And why the hell did it feel so.. nice? Another knock snapped him out of the reverie and he opened it, hand still on his cheek. 'Son of a bitch..' he thought. Six months and she was starting to wrap him around her finger. How the hell did women do that?
"What?" Miles asked, staring at him. "Did she slap you or something?"
Sawyer was still a little shell-shocked. "She kissed me."
Miles stared at him with his eyebrows raised. "Uh.. good for you, fabio."
()()END FB()()
Sawyer moved next to her again. "Whatever you saw, Juliet.. it wasn't real.."
Juliet shook her head, covering her face with her hands. "I let everyone down.." she whispered. "That.. thing should have killed me.. I wish it had killed me.." she told him in a hushed voice.
Sawyer frowned, hating the way her voice had started to waver. He could almost feel the sorrow dripping off of her. What was he supposed to say?
"Look at me, James!" she yelled out, banging her fist on the ground. "I'm a mess! I've killed someone.. let someone die because of me.. and left my family behind to worry and wonder.." she told him. "It should have killed me for what I've done.."
Sawyer pulled her into his arms, hugging her tightly. "It ain't your fault.." he assured her quietly. "Who you were.. what you did," he stated. "Its done, its over.." he explained. "That monster knows that.. for whatever twisted reason.. that damn thing knows you ain't a stone-cold killer.."
Juliet wrapped her arms around his waist, leaning her head on his shoulder.
"Ben manipulated you from the moment he got his hands on you.." he whispered.
"I wanna go home, James.." she told him, feeling the tears well up once more. "I want to get off this island and never look back.."
Sawyer nodded. "I'll find a way.." he assured her. "I'll get ya' home.."
"Us.." she whispered.
Sawyer smiled. "Yeah.. us."
Richard looked on with uncertainty. He knew it was time to consult Jacob. Perhaps, after what they'd all just done to that woman, he would understand she deserved to go home. Maybe..
()()FLASHBACK()()
Month nine.. it was a day Sawyer knew he would never forget when he opened the door to see Juliet standing there. For three months she would show up every couple of nights either with a plate of food(whether she had done something wrong, whether it was perfect, or even if she had dropped it on the rare occasion.) Today he noted, she had nothing in her hands. She almost never came empty handed, and from the look on her face, she obviously hadn't come empty-headed either. "You alright?"
Juliet simply shrugged in response, unsure what to say, or why she had actually come to him when she wasn't sure if she could actually even open up to him.
Sawyer frowned, narrowing his eyes before making room and motioning Juliet in. "What's wrong?" he questioned, watching the pain and the worry cross her features.
Juliet finally stepped in after he asked what was wrong. It was now or never to ask, no one else seemed to be daring enough to put it out there. "They aren't coming back.. are they James?"
Sawyer's eyes softened slightly in response.
"John.. he couldn't get them to come back."
Sawyer took her arm, leading her to the couch and sat her down. After a moment he sat down beside her. He knew, she was most likely right. Why would any of them actually want to come back to this place? "This about Jack?" he finally questioned. He was beginning to realize that he was forgetting a certain brunette the more he allowed a certain blonde to jump into his heart. Clearly though, she wasn't ready to give up on her hopes with Jack. Then again.. what woman in her right mind would? It least Jack had his head on straight in life as a surgeon. He was a low-life con-man, not exactly love-life material.
"He said.." she muttered. "We were in this together.." she admitted with a shrug. "He promised to get us all off this island.." she explained. "I thought he would keep me safe.."
Sawyer understood how that might upset her.
"He led me to believe.. that he would stay by my side," she told him, putting her head in her hands. "Even though I told him that Ben.."
Sawyer narrowed his eyes. "That Ben what?"
Juliet shook her head, standing up. "I shouldn't have come over."
"Juliet.." he stated, grabbing her hand. "You're already here.." he told her. "It ain't gonna kill you to let it out once and a while."
Juliet glanced down at him and frowned. He was right, in a sense. But when she opened up to somebody, they almost always, would eventually leave her soon after. She sighed and sat down. They were in start 1975.. where was he going to go? "I told Jack.. that the people on the freighter were waging war on Ben.. and that Ben was going to win."
Sawyer only seemed confused.
"And that when Ben won.. he wouldn't want to be anywhere near me.." she admitted.
"Why not?" Sawyer questioned.
Juliet looked slightly surprised. It had been the exact statement Jack had asked her. She simply remained silent.
Sawyer frowned. "Juliet.."
"Because James.. because Ben decided I was his.."
Sawyer looked shocked at the statement. "His?" he questioned in disbelief. The man had 'claimed' her?
Juliet looked away.
"A man can't just claim you Juliet.." he told her, trying to get her to look at him.
Juliet did look at him, this time with a face contorted with slight rage. "You think?" she asked him, her voice filled with an emotion she hadn't felt since the day in Ben's house when she'd screamed and yelled at him for being a liar. "This is Ben, James.." she explained. "He gets what he wants. And he's killed to get me before.. and he's killed to keep me."
Sawyer sighed. "What'd Doctor Feel-good say?"
Juliet smiled sadly. "He kissed me.. and told me.. 'He knows where to find me'."
Sawyer shook his head. So the Doc had screwed around with Juliet's head about as much as Kate had with his own. What did that make the two of them? Just two second-bests, he decided. "Well, you ain't nobody's that you don't wanna be, Juliet.." he told her, putting his hand on her cheek. "Bug-eyes ain't here, and I ain't no Doctor Do-Right," he admitted with a shrug. "But I won't let nothin' happen to you."
Juliet smiled a little. "Thanks, James.." she replied, placing one chaste kiss on his lips before standing up. "I should go.. Amy will wonder where I went off to."
Sawyer watched, once again as she left him sitting there speechless. As she closed the door behind her, he groaned and leaned back against the couch. "Son of a bitch.. what am I getting myself into?" he muttered, shaking his head. Two broken hearts, maybe thats just what it took to piece things together again. He sighed. Why the hell did she make him think so weird?
()()END()()
Um. Least that's not a cliffy?
