I stared wide-eyed out the windshield at the road, not talking. All I could think about was that gruesome sight. That guy, Chris…he was alive not long ago, we were talking to him and then…he was dead. Gone just like that.

I could see my dad giving me glances but I ignored him. "Abby?" He finally said. "You okay?"

I didn't answer right away. "What kind of gun was that?"

My dad breathed out before answering me. "It was a Barrett M82 Sniper Rifle." He told me. "Close range will do that."

"Why would anyone need a gun like that?" I asked still looking straight ahead.

"Well, they're for the military—

"They shouldn't even have them." I cut him off.

"Abby, I think we should—

"It blew the top of his head off." I raised my voice a little.

"I know." He sighed. "That was bad and I'm sorry you had to see that." He was looking at me, but I wasn't looking at him. "But, baby…that's what I was trying to tell you about bad people. Those guys were bad."

I turned to the window. "…we could've helped him."

"No, we couldn't." My dad said softly.

It made me even madder that he was being so calm about it. "Yeah, we could've!" I spoke louder. "We could've took him back with us. He'd be alive now—

"Abby!" He cut me off. "No, we couldn't. I'm sorry, but there was no way I was bringing him back. Listen to me…there were people looking for him. They could've found us. I wasn't risking putting you or Carl in danger. You two are the most important things to me. So, bringing him with us would've just been a lot of trouble."

I looked down fighting back tears and shaking my head. "Yeah, well…now he's dead and you had to kill those guys anyway."

My dad seemed to hesitate. "…he could've been bad too, you know?" He sounded calmer. "He said he stole stuff."

"So he deserved to die over it?" I put my arms out.

My dad sighed. "I had to do it…I had to kill those guys." He said ignoring my question. "You know that, right?"

"I don't know anything." I said getting emotional. "I just wanna go home." I put my head down and cried.

"Shh." My dad started slowly rubbing my back. I just continued to cry.


My dad and I didn't talk for the rest of the car ride home. We got home sometime in the evening. Daryl was standing on the front porch smoking a cigarette. I just slowly got out of the car to help with the bags.

"Back already?" Daryl asked. "Thought you'd be gone at least another day."

I just kept my head down and walked passed him without responding. I knew he gave me a weird look though.

"Yeah." My dad said with a sigh. "We had some trouble, but…we'll talk later."

I went to the back of the car to get some bags out of the trunk, my dad opened it and I saw that gun in there. My eyes went wide. "Holy shit." Daryl said and got it out. "Where'd ya find this?"

I gasped and backed away a little. "Abby, it's okay." My dad said. "Here, just take this bag." He handed it to me. "And just go ahead inside. You don't have to come back, okay? Daryl and I will get the bags." He rubbed my back a little as I walked by. I knew he was just getting rid of me so that he could talk to Daryl.


Narrator's POV

Rick Grimes sort of had his head down, but kept his eyes on his daughter. The man waited until the door closed to start talking. He sighed. "We ran into some guys out there."

"What guys?" Daryl seemed to get alarmed.

"It's okay. I killed them." Rick said. "But…" The man trailed off and sighed. He decided that it would be less confusing if he just told the whole story. "We were in a house and these guys showed up looking for another guy." The father started. "As we were trying to get to the car, we run into the guy they were looking for. Abby wanted to bring him back with us but there was no way. Well, those guys caught up with us and killed him. With that." He pointed at the sniper. "Abby saw the whole thang."

Daryl was silent for a moment as he thought about what Rick just told him. "Damn." He looked down. "I could tell by the look on 'er face that somethin' was wrong."

Rick sighed. "Yeah. I don't know what I'm gonna do." He grabbed a few bags. "She still thinks we could've helped him."

Daryl scoffed but didn't say anything to that. "So, what are we gonna do with this?" He was still holding the sniper.

"I figured I'd take it so someone else doesn't get their hands on it." Rick nodded. "We can lock it up in the shed out back for now."

Daryl nodded. "And hey, don't worry about Abby. She'll be alright."

Rick's mouth pressed into a thin line. "I don't know."

The two men carried in the bags.


Abby's POV

I stayed in my room for the rest of that day and didn't talk to anyone else. My dad came to get me for dinner, but I told him that I couldn't eat. For once he didn't bother me about not eating. There was no way I could. That image of Chris's head in pieces just made me sick. It's all I could think about.

Later that night when it was dark, I felt more scared than before. There's something about darkness that just makes everything worse. I tried staring at the moon out my window, which was my only light, but it wasn't doing me any good. It doesn't work when the thing I'm scared of is in my head.

I got out of bed and went down the hall to my dad's room. The door was cracked open so I didn't bother knocking. I could make out his shape in the darkness.

"Daddy?" I shook his arm.

He rolled over. "What's wrong?" He mumbled.

"I'm scared. Can I sleep in here with you?"

"Sure, baby." He scooted over so I could just crawl right in. I snuggled up close to him.

It still took me a while to fall asleep, but I did feel better with him.


When I woke up, it was morning and I was back in my room. I think I vaguely remember my dad carrying me in here early this morning when he got up. He must have closed the curtain too because it was open when I went in his room last night. I remember because I was looking at the moon.

My mind immediately went to Chris. I didn't feel as bad as I did yesterday but it was still bothering me pretty bad. I still couldn't eat, and I wasn't ready to go downstairs with the others yet either. I just wanted to be alone.

I stayed in my room for that whole day too.

When the night came, I was feeling scared again like last night so I slept with my dad again.

It took me a couple of days to be able to go downstairs and be around people. Once I finally did, I pretty much kept to myself anyway and didn't talk to anyone.

The nights, though…the nights were the worst. My dad tried to help me and stayed with me in my room instead of coming into his room. I always ended up crawling in bed with him anyway.

I started to doze off and felt him get up and leave the room. I realized soon after that I was alone in the dark. My mind went right to Chris and an image of his body flashed through my mind.

My eyes shot open and I wandered down the hall into my dad's room. "Daddy?" I said.

He was just about to get into bed. "Abigail." He sighed. "This is making me not wanna take you on anymore runs." I could tell he was irritated, which made me feel even worse. I began to cry. "C'mere." His expression softened.

I went over to him and sat on his lap burying my face in his chest and crying. "I'm scared."

"Shh shh." He tried to soothe me. "It's okay. I'm sorry." He held me.

I didn't know how I was ever going to get over this.


The next day, Daryl offered to take me hunting with him but I turned him down. The thought of me killing an animal bothered me anyway. I didn't want to kill anything that was alive. Also, I knew Daryl was just trying to be nice. I know he knows about what happened.

I was sitting by the fire in the living room trying to warm my hands. "Why didn't you go with Daryl?" My dad asked me. "You've been asking him to take you hunting."

"No." I said. "I wanted to go with him. I don't want to hunt though. I don't want to kill an animal."

"Abby, it's for food. So we can eat."

"I know. I still don't want to though."

There was a brief pause. "Well, you need to eat something. You've barely eaten in days."

"I'll try." I said to get him off my back.

"Thank you." He said. He bent over and kissed the top of my head as he walked by.


I knew my dad was getting tired of staying up at night with me, so I decided to stop bothering him. Instead, I figured I would just stay up the whole night and then sleep when it got light out. If I sleep in, who cares? I don't care what the others think. I need to sleep sometime, don't I?

However, it was a little cloudy that night and the moon kept getting covered by clouds leaving my room extra dark. I freaked out a little and ended up outside on the back porch where it was a little lighter.

I stared up at the moon asking it for help. "Please help me get over this." I whispered. "I don't wanna be scared anymore."

Just then, the door opened and I heard footsteps. "Abby." It was Daryl. "I thought that was you that I heard come out here." He made his way over to me. "What are you doin'? You shouldn't be out here."

"It was dark in my room. I was scared." I said sadly.

I saw in the moonlight that his expression changed. "Well, how 'bout I get ya light? Will that help?"

I just shrugged and kept my head down. There was a pause.

"You still upset about that guy?" Daryl asked me.

"…they blew his head off."

He sighed. "I'm sorry ya saw that. I know it was probably scary but…ya cain't keep thankin' about it."

"How can I not?" I kept my head down.

"Okay." Daryl sat down next to me. "Look, kid…this world is ugly. And I cain't promise that ya won't ever see somethin' like that again. Hell, it could be worse."

"That could happen to one of us…me." I looked at him.

"I ain't gonna lie to ya, it could." He said. "But that's why you gotta be able to kill bad people, like them guys, so that they cain't hurt no one else."

I thought about what he said. "So…kill the bad people so that the good people can live?" I looked at him.

"Exactly." He nodded.

I put my head down and thought some more. I still didn't want to kill anyone…but I tried looking at it in a different way. If that was my dad on his knees and those guys were threatening to do to him what they did to Chris, would I just let them?

I looked straight ahead now. No. I would do it. I would kill them. Still…it wouldn't be easy. I decided to say to Daryl what I did to my dad. I wanted to hear his response.

"Okay." I looked at him. "I get it now." I nodded. "But…killing someone can't be that simple."

"It ain't." He said. "But if you pull that trigger, ya have to mean it. You don't just kill anyone, you kill who you have to." He looked at me. "Like you said, kill the bad people so that the good people can live." He nodded. "And that was a good way of puttin' it. So…try keepin' that thought in yer head."

I looked down and took all of that in. His response was a million times better than my dad's. "Okay." I said. "I really do get it now."

Daryl gave me a nod. "I know." He stood up. "Now, let's go in." He put his hand out to me, I took it and he helped me up, then we walked in together.


As the days went by and time went on, the image of Chris was fading from my memory. It was still there, but more vague. I was slowly going back to normal. That talk I had with Daryl really helped me and soon I was back to my old self. Once again, making me Team Daryl.


I didn't notice the change right away, but my voice got a little deeper and I finally lost that scratchiness. In my mind, that meant I wasn't a kid anymore. I stared at myself in the mirror. I wasn't as tall as I wish I was, but I don't think I'm going to get much taller. I wasn't blessed with the tall gene. So that's something I'll just have to deal with.

I felt more confident and grown up now. I wasn't scared anymore. Sure there will be times when I get scared, that's just human nature, but…I'm not afraid. I know what's out there now.

I gave myself a nod, then headed downstairs.


I was sitting outside on the front steps attempting to braid my hair. It wasn't exactly working though. That's something I never learned to do, braid hair.

Just then, Glenn, Maggie and Michonne walked by carrying jugs of water. Maybe Maggie knows how to braid hair. "Maggie?" I said, she stopped. "Do you know how to braid hair? I'm trying to do a French braid but…I don't know how."

She gave me a small smile. "I know how, but I'm not really good at it." She told me. My shoulders slumped. "Sorry, honey. Maybe ask Carol."

They walked inside after that. I went back to trying to braid but I only got so far before it just didn't look right. I sighed and gave up.

"I can give you a braid." Michonne said. I didn't even know she was still there.

"Really?" I gave her a surprised look. She nodded. I smiled. "Can you do a French braid?"

Michonne sat behind me on the steps and began braiding my hair. "You seem different than you were before." She said. "How are you doing?"

Her question caught me a little off guard. I didn't know exactly what she meant. It seemed like my emotions have been all over the place for a long time. "Um…I'm okay." I shrugged. "I'm doing better than before at least."

"That's good." She said. "You have a nice smile. I'd like to see it more."

That was one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me so I didn't quite know how to respond. I just let out a small laugh.

"Okay, all done." She said.

"Wow, that was fast."

"It looks really pretty." She told me. "You'll have to go look in the mirror to see it."

I felt it with my hand, it felt nice and firm. I smiled. "Thank you."

She gave me a nod, then started inside.

"Michonne?" I said. She stopped and looked at me. "I'm, uh…glad that we found each other and you came back with us." I smiled. She smiled at me too.


Later on, I was sitting at the table with Daryl, Maggie and Glenn. We were playing poker. I already played with Glenn so he saw my skills, but Daryl and Maggie were impressed at how well I knew my stuff. My grandpa taught me when I was like nine and I used to play with him and my dad all the time. I think he only taught me because he wanted someone to play cards with.

Maggie was out so it was just Daryl, Glenn and me. I won that round and collected my chips. "You guys aren't letting me win, are you?" I was getting suspicious.

"You thank I'd let you win?" Daryl said to me.

"You've played with me before." Glenn said. "You know how I am."

"You're a terrible liar." Maggie told him. They laughed. I looked at her now. "Don't look at me." She said with wide-eyes. "You're just good at this."

"You wanna deal next?" Daryl asked me.

"Yeah." I started gathering up the cards. "I like dealing." I shuffled the cards like a pro, then passed some out to everyone. As we were looking over our cards, I said to Maggie, "so, did you ever have to pull boogers out of your cow's nose's?"

"What kinda question is that?" Glenn asked me.

I laughed. "I saw a video where this guy was pulling these huge boogers out of his cow's nose. It looked like raw chicken."

Glenn and Maggie laughed. "Unfortunately, I have." She said.

I let out a small laugh then took a sip of my drink.

"Hope ya didn't have to pull anythang out its ass." Said Daryl.

I almost spit my drink out, they all laughed. "Don't make me laugh while I'm drinking." I said while laughing. "I'm one of those people that their drink comes out their nose."

"Oh yeah?" Daryl said. I tried drinking again. "If chicken comes out its nose, maybe beef comes out its ass."

I laughed and this time my soda came out of my nose, it burned making my eyes tear up. "It burns." I said putting my hand over my nose. They all laughed at me. I was laughing too, but left the room to get some tissues.

There was a box on the desk in the front room, I was still laughing while wiping my nose. I ran into my dad in there. "Hey." He said. "You seem in better spirits."

"Uh, yeah." I said. "I talked to Daryl the other night. He helped me." I nodded and smiled a little.

"Oh." He sounded a bit surprised. "That's good."

I just smiled at him.


Everyone was at the table eating, I was the last one so I decided to make a grand entrance. "Hey." I said to no one in particular while sitting down. "Did you guys know that koalas eat poop in the first year of their life?" I grinned. My brother laughed immediately.

"No, but thanks for sharing." My dad said with raised eyebrows.

"Thanks for sharing while we're eating." Said Glenn.

"Yeah, thanks, Abby." Michonne said. I just laughed and got some food.

There was a brief pause.

"It's cold in here." My brother said.

"Yeah, it is, isn't it?" My dad looked at him. "Once you eat some food, that should warm you up."

I gave my dad a weird look. "Alright, weirdo." I said. Maggie and Michonne laughed. "We need whiskey like Daryl said." I smirked and looked at him. He let out the smallest laugh.

"If we had whiskey, you wouldn't get any." My dad said with raised eyebrows.

"Why?" I gave him a look, he retuned it with a stupid one. "Whatever." I waved him off.

It was quiet, which I didn't like. I liked making everyone laugh so I tried to think of a funny story or something that I could tell them. "So…this one time, during a school trip," I started, "we went to see this dumb play downtown, and afterwards when we were eating lunch, we were allowed to walk around in groups with our chaperone. And there were stands that were selling things. So, I saw this bag that I wanted and asked the guy how much it was and he said $86, and I was like, 'what? $86? I don't have that.' So he turned away and started talking to a woman, and…I just kinda walked away." I finished.

"With the bag?" My dad asked me.

"Yeah." I nodded and laughed. Some of the others did too.

"Abigail." My dad sounded surprised.

"You stole an $86 bag?" Glenn asked me with wide-eyes. I just nodded and laughed. "Oh my God." He laughed.

"Did your teacher find out?" Carol asked me.

"No." I said. "She didn't even notice." I shrugged. "But I told a bunch of my friends the next day. They all thought it was great."

Everyone laughed. I smiled. That's what I like to hear.


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