Chapter Four
She moved through the dark corridors like a ghost, not touching anything, not part of the world around her. She was alone, so alone... had she always been alone like this? Elsewhere people were laughing, enjoying themselves; she could hear their voices through the walls, but couldn't reach them. She had to find a way to get to them, or they would forget her, and she would never have existed. Did they still know her, care about her? She ran on. The hall was endless, and there was no way out. How she had gotten in she did not know. She ran on.
Now she stood before a pair of giant doors. She would never be able to push them open, but there was no need; they opened by themselves when she reached out and touched them. On the other side were humans, her entire family was there, and she ran towards them happily. They would remember her now and she could live! But none of them saw her. They were all looking the other way, looking towards the spot where she knew she should have been standing, but she was too late, and they had forgotten about her. Now, someone else stood there. He had their full attention. And he turned and looked at her, was the only one to see her, but his impassive eyes only confirmed it; she had missed her chance, and was forever too late, forever doomed to fail.
But I have changed! she yelled. Nobody heard her. The room faded.
She was running through a forest, chasing after her only hope, her only chance to be saved. The trees were impossibly tall and grey as mist, the floor was black and rippled where her feet touched it. There was no sound. She saw his shape running ahead of her, almost out of sight, faster than she could ever be. She could not keep up. She could never keep up. It was her doom. He called for her; faster, faster! he called, but she was too tired and her legs were too heavy... she fell down on her knees, reached out for his image, but he vanished in the darkness, and without him she could not exist because there was no one to know her. The trees faded, the darkness closed in. She was forever too slow. It ended here. The darkness closed in, and she vanished into nothingness...
Hinata jolted upright, her heart going crazy in her chest and her limbs trembling with sheer terror.
Where am I?
She tried to stand up in panic, then knocked her head against the metal frame of the tent and fell back on her sleeping mat, clutching her forehead.
That woke her up properly.
Gradually, she got her breathing under control, and while she waited for the pain in her head to wear off she took the time to organise her thoughts.
It was just a dream. I'm... still here. My legs...
Her legs were asleep but otherwise fine. She started rubbing some feeling back into them.
Just a dream. I'm awake now. It's light outside... it's safe. It was just a dream, it can't hurt me.
Yet it had seemed so real. She closed her eyes, trying to recall the images, but they slipped away to wherever lost thoughts go, leaving her with nothing but a vague uneasiness.
She looked around the tent again, and noticed with surprise that she wasn't alone. Neji was already up and gone, but Naruto had dug himself so deep inside his sleeping bag she hadn't been able to see him at first. As he turned in his sleep, his head became visible, still solidly in dreamland.
It is odd to see him this calm, when he is always so busy and energetic...
Hinata smiled. Seeing him lying there made her calm as well.
He's been right here, next to me, all night... There was no need for me to be afraid. With him near me, I'll always be safe.
Impulsively, she reached out and laid her hand on his head, gently stroking his hair.
Naruto....
"Hinata-sama?"
Hinata shrieked and quickly pulled her hand back. She hadn't noticed that Neji had opened the tent and was now kneeling down in the entrance. Her heart pounded and she felt she was turning red, but Neji didn't remark on it.
"How are you feeling today?" he asked instead.
"Ah, I'm fine..." she said vaguely, not answering his gaze.
"Good. We have a lot of travelling to do today, so get ready quickly."
With some effort they managed to wake Naruto, and within fifteen minutes the tent had been taken down and they continued on the winding path.
Naruto, in spite of the trouble he always had with waking up properly, was unusually alert. He constantly looked for any sign of danger, and he knew Neji was doing the same. They had decided not to tell Hinata about the kunai; her condition was already frail at the moment, and the less she had to worry about the better. Besides, whoever that kunai had belonged to was not necessarily after them. Neji had used his Byakugan to scan their surroundings, but there was no sign of either an attacker or a victim. There was, however, a slight blood trail that led from where Naruto had found the knife to a few hundred yards further, where it ended abruptly. Neji had speculated that someone had been trying to flee, but had got hit by the throwing knife and, after having collapsed due to his or her injuries, had been caught by the attacker and taken away.
Naruto had proposed looking for the victim, but Neji had reminded him that it was none of their business.
"There are always disputes between shinobi," he had said. "If they want our help, they'll send a request to Konoha. We can't help everyone who is in trouble. We have our own task right now."
That may have been true, but Naruto felt bad about it nonetheless. Someone had been attacked and abducted so close to their camp, and they had not even noticed it. Besides, the blood trail might as well have led the other way, meaning that the attacked had actually been heading for their camp. Had he thought he was saved when he saw the light of their fire? If so, it was all the more cruel.
I wonder who the attacker was. Who would be so heartless to wound someone badly, then watch them struggle on towards safety and finish them off just before they get there?
Maybe it was because of these thoughts that he couldn't shake the feeling somebody was watching them. He could almost feel a gaze on him, and sometimes he thought he saw something shifting out of the corner of his eye, but when he turned his head there was nothing to see but trees. When they finally took a break, he quietly told Neji about his suspicions, but the Hyuuga shook his head.
"At one point I used the Byakugan to check the surrounding area, just in case," he said. "There was nobody near us. I suspect it's just paranoia."
He sighed when he saw Naruto's unconvinced stare.
"Naruto, I know you're upset about what happened last night, but don't start chasing ghosts. Even if there is someone following us there is nothing we can do about it right now. I must ask you to focus on our own mission. Remember that we are doing this for Sasuke. I would have thought that would be enough incentive for you to behave rationally."
Sasuke...
For a moment, it seemed as if Naruto would keep arguing; then he turned around, walked over to Hinata, and slumped against the tree next to her. She looked up from her food in surprise.
"N-Naruto-kun?"
He didn't respond immediately, seemingly lost deep in thought, which was quite an unusual sight. Eventually he sighed, and said:
"He's right, of course. I shouldn't be distracted so easily, especially not now, when we only have a few months left."
Hinata stared at him blankly.
"Huh?"
"To find him, I mean. If we don't make it in time we might lose him forever. I'd never forgive myself if that happened."
He clenched a fist.
He's talking about Sasuke-kun, Hinata realised.
She had never really understood the relation between Naruto and Sasuke. Few people had, of course; the bond between them was almost unique, a combination of friendship and rivalry that strengthened them both, and inspired them to work harder every day. Now that Sasuke was gone, all Naruto wanted was to bring him back, but as more time passed their chances of success were ever decreasing. In spite of all his determination and power Naruto couldn't save his friend, and that hurt him more than any physical pain he had ever endured. To see him suffer like that and not being able to help...
"Sasuke-kun... is really important to you, isn't he?" she asked quietly.
"He's my best friend. Or was, anyway. That's why I have to get him back. You can't leave your friends behind, ever."
He prodded the dry dirt absent-mindedly.
"Do you... remember when he left Konoha, and we went after him?"
Hinata nodded. Of course she remembered. She had not been part of the group of five that went after Sasuke, but both Neji and Naruto had. When they had returned, two of them, including Neji, had been half dead and Naruto had been completely worn out. Neji later told her they had ran into some of Orochimaru's jounin, but he never went into details. And nobody seemed to know exactly what Naruto had done, or if they did they weren't about to tell.
"We got split up, one by one," said Naruto. "Eventually I was chasing Sasuke alone. I caught up with him. He said he wanted to break all bonds with me and with the village. We... we fought. We both gave it our best, but in the end, I wasn't strong enough... I got knocked out."
He looked up at Hinata, a flicker of doubt in his eyes.
"He could have killed me, could have broken those bonds right there and then. But he let me live. And that is why... why I think... that he can still be saved."
Hinata listened in silence, not knowing anything to say that would help him or cheer him up.
Naruto-kun... don't be so uncertain about it... I believe in you! I know you can do it! I would help you with all my power if you would let me, but... in your goal of saving Sasuke, there is no place for me, it seems... not yet...
Suddenly, completely unexpectedly, Naruto started to grin.
"But you know what? I haven't forgotten what you told me once. And you were right."
He stood up, once again fully determined.
"I make mistakes, a lot of mistakes. But I learn from then, and I get stronger. And I promise, I won't lose to him next time!"
Hinata looked at him, unable to believe that what she had just heard. For so long, Naruto had given her courage, had inspired her to stay strong and positive, to work harder. And she had strived to become more like him, to have just a bit of that willpower, to be recognised by him as he wanted to be recognised by others. What she wanted was to be of influence to him, to give back a little of that determination, to inspire him like he inspired her. And now....
Are those my words, that give him part of his determination now? My words, that he still remembers even after all those years? But then...
She smiled shyly. Maybe she wasn't completely useless after all. Maybe she really could be important to others... to him. It certainly was a good start.
After about fifteen minutes Neji told them to get ready again. Naruto jumped up eagerly, as he always thought the breaks took way too much time. Hinata took it easier, packing any leftovers and wrappings into her neatly organised backpack first. Nobody would even consider tainting the untouched nature with trash. Then she stood up quickly, which was a mistake.
The world started dancing around her. The trees were spinning, the ground wobbled left and right, she felt she lost her balance and was about to fall, but then Naruto was there to support her. Slowly, very slowly, everything returned to its normal position.
"Hinata! What's wrong?" Naruto asked worriedly.
"Um... I'm okay now, I think..." she stammered, very much aware of the warmth of his arm on her back.
"I thought something like that might happen at some point," Neji stated calmly. "It's probably the backlash of our intensive travelling yesterday. You have only just recovered from a serious illness, Hinata-sama; it was careless to spend so much energy. I should have intervened earlier."
He gave an apologetic nod.
"From here on out, we'll move at walking pace until you've regained your strength."
"N-no, I'm really fine!" Hinata said weakly. "I can go on..."
"It's okay, Hinata-sama. We are far ahead of schedule. Besides, we would have to move slower anyway as we are leaving the set path."
He pointed out the new direction.
"We will travel more or less west from here, a route that will bring us to a slightly mountainous area eventually. Beyond that lies our destination. If you both are ready, then let's get moving."
Hinata still felt guilty, but then Naruto laid a hand on her shoulder.
"Don't worry about it! Like he said, we can take it easy for a while." He grinned. "Besides, caring for your teammates always comes first."
He let go and followed Neji.
Hinata closed her eyes, trying to capture the feeling of his touch, to remember it as long as possible. The warmth of his hand spread throughout her whole body, caressing her senses and feeding the fire in her heart, which had burned there ever since she had met him.
He cares about me.
Then she followed.
Now that they moved at a normal pace for a change, Naruto finally had a chance to properly think about Hinata again. The feeling had been bugging him all the time, but the excitement about the blooded kunai had moved it to the background. Now it was back, and it was different, stronger than before. Even if he didn't look at her but just thought about her he felt that warmth inside, that urge to just be with her and talk to her. She didn't say much, but she listened attentively to everything he said and he knew she was genuinely interested, unlike most people.
He watched with pleasure as she enjoyed the fresh air, the warmth of the sun, the beautiful nature around them, and he noticed she really was different from the Hinata that had joined them at Konoha's gate the day before. He realised that somehow, Hinata had always seemed slightly out of place in the city, as if she didn't really fit in. In the large crowds she seemed to dwindle, and the tall buildings appeared to close her in, to oppress her.
But here, outside of the urban areas, she blossomed, and it was a magnificent sight. She seemed to be one with the nature around her, not an intruder in the cycles of nature but part of them, not an unwanted stranger but a welcome visitor from other parts. The pure air gave her fresh energy, the rays of the sun brought colour to her cheeks, and Naruto couldn't help noticing time and again how pretty she was. She moved with a certain grace that was a mix of the naivety of before and the maturity that was to come, sometimes admiring nature from a distance, sometimes kneeling down to examine a particularly beautiful flower. She never picked one, and Naruto wondered why.
"Don't you like picking flowers?" he asked eventually.
She blushed.
"Ah, I do, really. I collect them, actually. But out here, I can't keep them... I'd just pick them and throw them away later. It would be a waste..."
"They're just flowers," Naruto said, but without malice.
She nodded and smiled, but still refrained from picking any.
She has such a gentle nature. I can see why some people would think her unfit to be a kunoichi. But I know there's a much tougher side of her, hidden behind those kind eyes. She's shown that during the Chuunin Exams, when she just wouldn't give up, up until the point where she had to be hospitalised. That combination of kindness and determination definitely make her one of the strangest persons I've ever known.
It was getting hot again, just like it had been on the days before, so Naruto took off his thick vest and tied it around his waist.
"That's a lot better. I can't remember having any summer this hot in my life!"
He glanced at Hinata, who was dripping with sweat.
"Hey, Hinata, shouldn't you do the same? It's no good being overdressed in this weather. You'll get overheated if you're not careful."
She turned red.
"I would, but... I can't, really. It's not suitable."
Naruto didn't get it.
"Why not? What's not suitable about it?"
"I-in my position... I should dress modestly at all times. It's tradition, in a way."
"Ah, come on! Who's going to mind out here? It's just me and Neji."
"I know!" she said desperately. "But... but..."
She couldn't think of anything else to say. Her resistance melted away in the face of Naruto's practicality; after all, it really wouldn't do her any good to be overcome by the heat. Hesitatingly, she took off her vest and tied it up like Naruto had. Below it she wore a simple fishnet shirt, a garment commonly used by shinobi, which was really just as modest as her vest but at least exposed her arms to the sun. Neji shot her an irritated glance over his shoulder, but she looked away, made defiant by Naruto's presence.
For about an hour, nothing exciting happened. Hinata wondered why she had become so dizzy that morning. Was it really just a lack of energy? She vaguely recalled being dizzy before falling ill in Konoha as well.
I really hope that won't happen here. In the worst case, we'll have to return... then nothing will have changed. I'll still be that burden I was. I can't let that happen.
It was just then that, completely out of the blue, she broke into a violent coughing fit that seemed to rip up her lungs from the inside, and another wave of dizziness caused her to fall down on her knees. Again, Naruto was the first to come to her aid. Neji looked on from a distance, but the irritated look he had been wearing had disappeared, and when she finally stopped coughing he relaxed, clearly relieved. Naruto was holding Hinata's hand, and stared worriedly into her eyes.
"Hinata, what's wrong with you? Don't become sick, please don't. We need you."
Her white eyes stared into his blue ones, and she felt the world stabilising.
I can't let him down.
She forced herself to stand up, ignoring the pain in her chest.
"It's over. I'm fine," was all she managed to say.
But Neji held up his hand. "Wait."
"I mean it, Neji-nii-san. Let's go on-"
"No! Quiet! There's something else!"
Neji looked around for a moment, then closed his eyes.
"Byakugan!"
Veins started bulging on his temples to deliver extra chakra, and when he opened his eyes again the pupils were outlined much stronger than before, signifying that he had activated his Byakugan.
He stood perfectly still for a while, but the others knew he was scanning their surroundings and they waited patiently for the results.
"I can't see anything," he admitted eventually. "Strange. I was sure that just now..."
They wouldn't find out what he was so sure of, because suddenly an extremely bright flash of light blinded them all, hurting their eyes and disorientating them. Hinata grabbed Naruto's hand tighter. Then she heard something move in front of her, and Neji's familiar voice said:
"Eight Divination Palms of the Hand, Heavenly Spin!"
She could feel his chakra swirl around them, protecting them from all sides, and when the technique ended there was silence.
As sight slowly returned to her eyes, she could see why Neji has used his defensive jutsu. All around them, kunai knives lay scattered over the ground, obviously deflected by Neji's chakra.
Who threw these? Why would anyone just attack us like that?
She looked around, but the dust thrown up by Neji's spin made it hard to see. Was that a human shape over there, just a few dozen yards away?
"Who are you?" Neji asked angrily.
The answer came immediately, as if prepared in advance and rehearsed so many times.
"Your doom."
