Chapter Six
At the old desk in the small, windowless, wood-panelled chamber, a young man was working by the light of about a dozen candles. He was calmly scribbling large amounts of text on an empty scroll, in a clean, curvy handwriting that betrayed a good education. His fairly short, ash blonde hair was neatly combed and his pale blue eyes stared at the paper with a relaxed look. His face gave the impression that he spent too much time reading books, but he also possessed the confident and self-aware air of those who know they're doing what they are good at and have nobody to fear.
He did not seem to be in any hurry to finish his work. Every now and then he would stop writing and let his gaze wander idly through the room, as if checking whether something interesting had happened yet. Sometimes, though not as often, he would also turn around to check on his shadows on the wall, which were vague and smeared out without the light of the hearth-fire to pale that of the candles. When nothing happened to them, the man would vaguely smile to himself and return to his work.
For a long time, the scribbling of pencil on paper was the only sound to be heard.
Then, a hushed voice called:
"Rousoku-sama?"
The young man looked over his shoulder and stared at the newly formed shadow.
"Hi," he said in a calm, almost mellow voice.
"Modosu?" responded the shadow in surprise. "What are you doing here? I must speak to Rousoku-sama. Tell him it's urgent."
Modosu put his pencil away, turned around and kneeled down on a dusty, threadbare mat which, while looking completely out of place in the office-like room, was at least slightly more comfortable than the hard floor.
"I'm afraid Rousoku-sama is not in at the moment. He's praying in the Temple, and he may not be disturbed. Can I take a message?"
"No," the shadow replied immediately. "Forget it. I will contact you again later-"
"This is about Ingou, right?"
The shadow fell silent, and Modosu knew he was right. Of course, he had already been fairly certain before. That was why he had been waiting here, after all.
"I shouldn't be surprised, I suppose," continued the shadow eventually. "There seems to be little that you don't know of."
Modosu shrugged the comment off. He knew it wasn't meant as a compliment.
"I simply happened to be there when the boy was sent out. He was chosen by Rousoku-sama personally, you know."
"You knew about this and yet you didn't even try to stop it. Sometimes I wonder if we're even on the same side."
"I don't see why you are so upset. It was just a kid, surely he couldn't have gotten in your way?"
"He nearly managed to kill them, nearly ruined everything! Rousoku-sama himself told me that the rest of the plan would be my responsibility, so why does he insist on sending his own minions to make a mess of things?"
"He's an impatient man. The lack of any action on your part may have caused him to think you wouldn't get the job done yourself."
"Lack of action?"
Modosu could almost feel the eyes of the shadow widen in disbelief.
"Haven't I already led them all the way here? Of course I haven't struck yet, what would be the point at this stage? The closer I lure them to you, the less effort it will take when the time is right."
"I know, I know. And I agree with you," Modosu said in a placating voice. "But my advice often falls on deaf ears with Rousoku-sama, even though I'm the only one he dares to trust. His fear of failure and the risks involved in this plan have made him even more paranoid and stubborn than before, and combined with the power his position grants him, that makes him..."
"A liability!"
"And to his own plans, no less. But he won't see the truth in those words, and I cannot change that; my job is to serve and advise him, no more."
He spread his arms out in a typical 'so be it' gesture.
"But what does it matter anymore? The boy was defeated, and soon it will be your turn. Once they are safely within our grasp our success is almost guaranteed."
"Yes. Tell Rousoku-sama I will bring them in tomorrow night."
Modosu smiled gently, knowing very well that his facial expression would not be visible on the other side.
"He'll be pleased to hear it. So, is that all? I'm really rather busy."
"I'm sure you are. I'll be in touch."
And with those words, the shadow split back up into the vague, fractured shape it had been before, leaving Modosu alone with his piles of scrolls.
He reflected on the conversation for a moment, as if playing it back in his head. Then he smiled a very satisfied smile.
"A liability...? The ignorance of some people..."
He glanced at the amount of work left for him to do, then shrugged. There would be little time for normal paperwork the next few days. Maybe never again, if things turned out badly. He absent-mindedly rubbed his knuckles.
"For the people," he spoke softly to himself. "For the clan."
Then he nodded, extinguished all but one candle, quickly left the room and locked the door behind him.
***
Hinata woke up with a start, her eyes wide open, her body immediately ready to strike, deflect or make a run for it, whichever the situation required. As her eyes became accustomed to the dark, she could make out Naruto´s curled up shape next to her. At her feet, near the entrance, sat Neji, who touched his lips with one finger, then gestured at the opening of the tent.
Hinata, relieved, nodded sleepily, wondering what Neji could possibly want to talk about at this hour. She put on her socks and sandals, then followed him into the cold, damp darkness of the night. One of the things she noticed directly was that the weather had changed; the sky was now cloudy, and the bright moon was only sporadically visible between the huge moving shapes high up in the air. Another thing was that Ingou, who had been lying tied up just outside their tent, was gone. The ropes that had held him captive were tossed aside carelessly. Hinata shot Neji a shocked glance, but he beckoned for her to follow him and walked off into the woods.
They walked in silence for a minute or two, and Hinata could already feel the initial rush of waking up wear off. Her limbs felt as though they were made of lead, and yet she felt as if she was floating rather than walking. She wondered vaguely whether it was just lack of sleep or something else that made the trees wobble slightly and moved the moon around like that. She had barely slept at all, too busy trying to suppress the violent coughing that had been pestering her all night, and had only just fallen asleep when Neji had woke her up. Maybe she ought to tell him she really wanted to sleep. But he wouldn´t have brought her out here if he didn´t have something important to say, would he?
She nearly bumped into him as he suddenly stood still and turned around. He observed her carefully, and a guilty expression flickered over his face.
"Hinata-sama," he said softly, "you don't look good. If I had known this I wouldn't have brought you out here in the cold."
He paused.
"Well, now you're here anyway we might as well get this over with quickly."
"Y-yes," she stammered. "What happened to... that Bloodline Limit user?"
Neji looked surprised.
"Oh, him? He escaped. Mere ropes can't hold a shinobi, you know that as well as I do."
"Then why-"
"Because the alternatives were a lot less appealing. We could either have brought him along on our mission or killed him on the spot, both of which were inconvenient, to say the least. Besides, since he was hit with the full Sixty-Four Strikes he won't be able to fight at full strength again for at least a week, and by then we should be back in Konoha."
He made an impatient gesture.
"But this is not what I wanted to talk to you about. I wanted to talk about you."
"M-me?"
"You and Naruto."
Hinata blushed.
Me and Naruto? What does he mean?
"I'm not sure what there could be to say..."
"Don't pretend you don't know. You have feelings for him, everyone can see that."
He folded his arms, waited to see what she had to say.
A faint smile crossed Hinata´s face. She felt a bit embarrassed to talk this over with Neji, but she also felt proud, proud to admit how she felt.
"Yes… for a very long time, I have… I have watched him, wanted to be with him… and now that he's returned, I found out that… that I really l-"
"But that ends here!" Neji interrupted fiercely.
Hinata looked up in shock. "W-what?"
"Your endless stuttering, your blushing, your fainting, it has to end! You have to let go of this childish crush!"
Hinata had to lean against a tree to prevent herself from falling as a wave of light-headedness washed over her, destabilising her further in a world that had already been turned upside-down.
"Let go? I don't... understand..." she stammered, but her display of weakness only seemed to agitate Neji further.
"You and Naruto can never be together! Any feelings you have for him, that you think you have for him, are doomed from the start, and if you keep chasing this petty dream, this fairytale, then you'll end up broken and alone before you have a chance to see the danger!"
"But why?" she cried out desperately. "What's so wrong about it? Why can't we be-"
"Hinata-sama, you are the heiress of Konoha's oldest and most influential clan. Naruto Uzumaki is a nobody when it comes to status. Your father would never allow you to be together."
"My... my father?"
Suddenly it dawned on her, so obvious and clear she couldn't believe she had not seen it immediately.
"Did he... order you to tell me this?"
Neji was taken aback for one moment, but rallied easily.
"Only to warn you that you have to take a different path in life. Hiashi-sama is not a cruel man, but he is set in his ways and values tradition and honour more than anything. And I can see he is right in this case. The way you act around Naruto is a complete embarrassment. You grovel at his feet! You would do anything for him, if only he asked! Such submissive behaviour is totally unacceptable for someone in your position!"
Hinata stared at the ground, not knowing what to do or what to say now that just when she thought she finally had a chance with Naruto, another obstacle came up in the shape of her father. Was that what she had been struggling for all those years? To just have her dreams smashed again? She felt the panic mounting as she realised the implications of what Neji said. If her father didn't want her to be with Naruto, then she wouldn't be – his power in the Hyuuga clan was absolute. The idea was ridiculous, impossible to imagine, but one look in Neji's serious eyes was enough to convince her – this would be her last mission with Naruto, ever!
"Honour..." she whispered, in a futile attempt to understand what was going on. "This is all about honour?"
Neji shook his head impatiently.
"That is only half of the problem. The other half lies within yourself."
He brought his face closer to Hinata's and stared relentlessly into her eyes. She unconsciously tried to back away, afraid of what he would say.
"You are weak, Hinata-sama. You have always been weak, and you will always remain weak if you don't change. That is the biggest problem... but I guess it has always been, for you."
Fear took hold of her heart, and a cold feeling spread out from there throughout her body.
"Weak? But... I have worked so hard! For so long, I... I have worked to improve, to prove myself..."
"And still," Neji interrupted mercilessly, "you are weak. You never trained for yourself, you only trained for Naruto, and by relying on him so much you have neglected to become strong yourself."
Hinata winced as if he was hitting her.
That's not true, that's unfair! My life, my whole life I tried to get stronger, and I really have! I have changed, so there has to be a way... this can't be really happening!
"Y-you are wro-"
"Don't argue! There is no point. This is your father's decision, not mine. He sees the negative influence Naruto has on you, sees you are still too weak to become the leader of the clan one day. And he is determined to change this pathetic situation."
He stared impassively at her scared and confused face, and sighed.
"Just accept the facts, Hinata-sama. Your weakness has determined this outcome for you. I'll only say this once more. Forget about Naruto. The dream is over, and it's time to wake up. From here on out, you will stay as distant from Naruto as circumstances allow, and eventually your father will find someone who is better suited for you. That is your future, and you cannot change that."
He looked up at the sky.
"The weather is turning bad, so let's get this over with. Are you going to accept this proposal or are you going to make a fuss? The outcome will be the same. Your father's word is law."
A cold wind started to whistle through the trees. Dark clouds passed overhead and hid the pure white moon from sight, and a soft drizzle began to fall, hardly obstructed in its downward journey by the far-apart trees. The small drops settled on Hinata's dark hair and light skin, forming droplets that ran from her forehead down her nose and dripped on the ground, where they were soaked up by the dry earth.
She didn't reply. She was frantically trying to work the crazy situation out in her mind, but she couldn't find a way out, couldn't find a solution. It was all happening so fast, she didn't have time to organise her thoughts. Neji's words and the casual tone with which he ripped her future apart were like red hot pokers, feeding emotions she had rarely ever felt before, and she felt the pressure rising on the inside.
"Well?"
Almost unconsciously, she clenched a fist.
"So what..." she said softly, almost without producing any sound at all.
Neji raised an eyebrow.
"I'm sorry?"
"So what?!" Hinata yelled suddenly, causing Neji to stumble backwards in surprise. Her face was wet with the rain and tears, and her expression was distorted by her outburst of cropped-up frustration and misery.
"So what if my father doesn't like it? I don't care anymore! I'm old enough to know what I want! And I want Naruto! That's all I want, all I ever wanted! How is that too much asked? Why can't I just be with him?"
Neji held his hands up in a supposedly calming gesture.
"Hinata-sama, you are the heiress-"
"I know who I am!" she screamed. "I am Hinata Hyuuga, and I have the right to live my own life the way I want to, just like anyone else!"
"Is that so? You really think you're living your own life?"
Neji raised his voice as well.
"Just look at you! Look at what being near him for two days did to you! You are no longer yourself!"
"I am more myself than I was ever before! And if father doesn't like me the way I am, then... then... I'll leave this rotten clan, and he can find himself another stupid heiress!"
In a sudden and completely unexpected movement, Neji's hand shot out and grabbed Hinata's chin, then forcibly pulled her face close to his own.
"Enough!" he hissed through his teeth, and Hinata was immediately silenced, realising she had crossed an invisible border. As she was forced to look into Neji's cold, angry eyes, she was suddenly afraid of him in a way she had never been before.
"Enough," he repeated, while trying to get his breathing under control. "You will stop acting like a child now. Don't you ever think before you speak? Leaving the clan, what idiocy is that?"
She tried to wriggle loose, but he held on tightly.
"Look at me. Look at me!"
She did. In his eyes she saw determination, but also regret for his sudden outburst, and once he had her attention he slowly let go of her and lowered his voice.
"Nobody ever leaves the clan, at least not for long. The secret of the Byakugan must always be safeguarded, and the elders won't hesitate to order your death if you run away."
She couldn't look away, was forced to face him, but she felt the net of her life close around her, slowly cutting off all escapes until there was only one option left. She made a decision.
"If that´s how it is..." she said with a shaky voice. "If I have to choose between death or a life without Naruto... then my choice is already made..."
Neji huffed, unimpressed.
"Don't be so selfish. This isn't just about you. Do you think your friends will stand by idly? Do you think Naruto will? They will try to protect you, they will fight the clan if necessary. No matter who wins, many will die. Because of you."
He sighed.
"Are you still unable to see there's no way out of this? Don't you see every argument you could possibly make has already been anticipated and countered? It's pointless to struggle."
Hinata looked at him incredulously. She started to realise that she had lost the battle long before she had known she was fighting at all, and now it was too late to change anything. No matter how much she had told herself she had grown, she was still just a pawn, being used by others and not allowed to do anything significant herself, and with this realisation came a new wave of pain and sorrow, but this time there was no way to avoid it, no good feeling to fend it off. She gasped and clutched her chest as the pain shot through her heart.
Why, why me, why now? I thought I could change myself... I thought I could be with him if I worked hard enough... but...
She sank on her knees, on the wet moss, and her fingers cramped as she uttered a sob that spawned from the very depths of her soul.
But it was never meant to be!
Another sob, and she could not hold back the tears which started flowing down over her cheeks again, mixing with the increasingly heavy rain that was now beating down on them.
Neji looked down upon her, his arms folded, his gaze expressing both disdain and pity.
"Just look at you," he said in a contemptuous tone. "You're even weaker than you were three years ago. What a waste."
Hinata couldn't bear it, couldn't take any more of his words. She turned around and ran away, not looking back even once, even though she heard him call after her. She splashed through newly-formed puddles, cut her hands on wet tree branches, tripped over roots, but she kept going because all she knew how to do was run, run in the same way she had ran away from her problems when she had been little, before Naruto had given her hope. She ran until she could go no more, until dizziness and fatigue and the cold caught up with her and she fell full length on the ground, panting and sweating. The rain kept falling mercilessly, soaking her clothes and cooling down her skin, but it was nothing compared to the gruesome storm inside of her. All the happiness, all the relief and all the hope had disappeared, had faded from her heart like colours fade from clothing, washed away by torrents of water or sadness and fear alike. Helplessness took their place, accompanied by a mounting feeling of despair that rapidly grew stronger as Hinata could feel everything she believed fall apart, everything she had worked for be erased by those horrible words, words containing horrible truths which were all different and yet all meant the same: her dreams would never come true.
She shivered, coughed and wheezed, then shivered again and couldn't stop it anymore. It was so cold around her, so cold...
Naruto-kun, what would you do... what can I do without you...?
Her vision blurred, reducing the vaguely lit trees around her to indistinguishable blobs.
I don't want to live a life of loneliness... and I can't leave it all behind me... perhaps it would be best if it ended here...
The cold numbed her, up to the point where she didn't even feel it anymore. The world around her grew darker, the murmur of the rain sounded unreal and far away, and then there was another sound. Footsteps?
Naruto-kun...?
Gently, ever so gently, the tip of the sword was rested on her throat, and a young but rough voice said, slowly and clearly:
"Get up. You're coming with me."
