Hello Everyone!

Hope you like this chapter. It's my longest chapter yet! Yay. I would've had it out sooner, but with Christmas and everything my co-author and I were pretty busy. You'll be happy to know that I'm over half-way through with the next chapter, so I should probably have it out before New Year depending on how long it takes my co-author to look it over.

Read and Review!

-TG


Ignorance is Bliss/ Little White Lies

Jasper POV

I watched our newest recruits' every move, studying their jerky, unorganized movements and uncertain expressions. It was almost amusing watching them try to cope with their new abilities and their corresponding emotions. They were so confused. Their new minds could wrap around so much more than before, that they could barely find information to fill that empty space. It was pathetic in a way- I mean, they were practically toddlers. Finally, I couldn't just observe. Unlike these amateurs, I didn't have to think about strategy. More than a hundred years of continuous battle and training had morphed my mind into instant strategy. There was no such thing as premeditation when your mind could think faster than you could you could blink.

So in one swift, fluid motion- so different from those of these amateurs -I had both recruits pinned in place. One had been lunging, one had been dodging. The dodging one couldn't have been more than 17 when he was changed. He didn't show any particular talent, but he was pure brawn. You could tell he was much better at lunging than dodging, considering the fact that it took longer for him to get so much solid mass out of the way. He had an army-like buzz cut, so he looked suited for fighting already. At that moment, I had that recruit pinned on the ground. A soldier's balance had to be absolutely perfect to reflect a blow, but his faulty balance made it it too easy to shove him face-first into the ground.

At the same time as this blow, I had the other recruit, a more lithe-looking creature that had an eerie, snake-like appearance to him, by the neck. He had shaggy black hair, which hung in his face shielding his red eyes, fresh from his first hunt. This recruit showed little promise in physical bulk, but he had an uncanny ability of stealth- even more so than the usual vampire. His attack was clearly atrocious: his stance was weak and awkward, and his arms were stretched at the wrong angles for a successful attack. In the same instant as I had taken down the big one, I had deflected this recruit's weak lunge and held him suspended in the air by his neck.

The dirt on the ground had picked up in my attack, and I could see the individual dust particles settling down around us again. I closed my eyes and used the full forces of my power, reaching deep into each of their emotions to sense their exact reactions. The big one was dumbfounded- slightly in awe -and the other one was afraid. He knew perfectly well that he wouldn't die if I was to crush his neck in my hand, but he knew it would hurt. If they joined forces, they could probably overtake me with their newborn strength, but they didn't dare cross me. I'd shown them who was in control, who had more experience.

There was a slow, thudding clap resounding through the clearing. The whole group had paused to watch my outburst of frustration for these newborns. Maria was the one clapping. Nettie let out a giggle, and Lucy had a knowing smirk on her face. The other newborns looked on sympathetically towards the new recruits, knowing well the pain of first training. Not wanting to provide a show, I dropped the recruit I had suspended in mid-air to his feet, and I flipped over the other with a swift nudge. They immediately sprung into their army stances, intimidated in the presence of all four leaders.

"See, Jasper, I knew you couldn't resist this for long... even with what's-her-name long gone." I winced. I had been distracting myself fairly well, keeping my thoughts of Alice on the back burner in my mind. I had been trying to focus on training, not because of the need to fight but because I needed something to keep me here where I needed to be -instead of in the meadow with Alice, where I wanted to be. But now that Maria mentioned even the idea of Alice, I couldn't help but think about her.

It had been exactly 223 hours, 43 minutes, and 27 seconds since I had left her side to rejoin this place. It had been exactly 58 hours, 9 minutes, and 56 seconds since I had last seen Alice. Last time I had seen her it had been... rough, to say the least. She had taken to sitting in the meadow, keeping her mind open for me so she could make sure I was safe. Her irises had been almost completely pitch black when I saw them last. There had only been a subtle difference between her pupils and irises, so small only a vampire could have noticed. As needy as her eyes looked, Alice wasn't showing any signs of pain. Every time I had visited her in the past week, she had assured me that she was fine... but just thinking about those hours that stretched between now and our last meeting, I longed to see her, to check on her again.

In the few seconds that passed while I thought to myself, no one moved. They were all waiting in anticipation for me to do something. Maria's emotions were the only steady ones. There was not a hint of anxiety in her feelings. Quite the opposite, actually. She was feeling a strange sense of gratification as she mistook my frustration and anger as a confirmation. She had this crazy idea that I couldn't resist a life of violence and war, and- to her -this only proved her point. Ever since I had arrived back at camp, I had remained aloof; always sneaking away to the meadow when I got a chance. Maria, however, had been trying to keep me busy with recruiting and training since the moment I stepped foot into of the clearing. That had made it hard to see Alice often without it looking suspicious.

I turned away from the group, walking at my full speed towards the edge of the clearing. I longed to see Alice. As I was reaching the edge of the clearing, I recognized a pair of footsteps sounding in sync with mine as they rushed to catch up.

"Another one or your walks, Jazzy?" Maria said in a sickeningly sweet voice. I cringed at the nickname, for it sounded wrong coming from any voice but Alice's.

"I was planning on it, yes." I replied, shirking from her subtly as she inched away the distance between us.

"If you wanted some company, I could-"

"I don't." I said quickly, trying desperately to lead her away from the direction I was actually going. Her feelings were hurt, but I didn't pay her any mind. Leaving her behind, I ran ahead, making a swerving path so it would be practically impossible for anyone except perhaps a Volturi tracker to find me. I waited until I was miles away from camp and from hearing distance to make my way towards the meadow.

I made it to the meadow in record time, my longing to see Alice driving me to go faster than I'd ever gone before. When I broke through the trees, I looked around the meadow for her. I could feel her emotions somewhere. That strange calm and giddy emotion that was unique to her seemed to surround the entire meadow. She was no where in plain sight...

Then I felt little soft hands wrap around my eyes and a voice that sounded like bell-chimes whisper, "Guess who?"

I smiled and wrapped my hands around the tiny wrists of my mystery person, and pulled her around to my front. I kept my eyes closed, enjoying the feeling of relief her presence brought to me as I wrapped my arms around her. I smiled when I felt her similar feelings of relief. I didn't want to open my eyes yet and face the truth. I couldn't see what the effects of her starvation were yet.

I delayed watching for a little while longer, whispering next to her ear, "How are you?" I wanted to be prepared for what I was about to see, maybe her status would give me an inclination of that.

"Now I'm wonderful." That didn't help. I would just have to see for myself.

Finally, I pulled away and braced myself for what I was about to see. Opening my eyes, I saw her. She was still my Alice, but she had obviously changed since the last time I had seen her. Her irises and pupils were pure pitch now, and the black looked to be spreading. Little veins of black were winding through the whites of her eyes like little lightning bolts protruding from the dark clouds of her iris. Even in the new, bright sunlight of morning her skin looked pallid. It was no longer sparkling, but merely shimmering beneath what looked to be a translucent layer of skin. I was staring at her face with a concerned look, and before long she touched her hand to her cheek self-consciously.

"What? What is it? Do I look that bad?" She said, a hint of worry escaping her words, but, strangely enough, not her emotions. Before I could think about her lack of changing emotions, she was walking away from me towards the reflective surface of the water. I didn't want her to have to see herself this way, so I quickly grabbed her wrist and pulled her back into my chest.

I kissed her forehead gingerly and said, "You are beautiful." She smiled and closed her eyes, accepting the complement instead of risking seeing for herself. She took my hand that was still wrapped around her wrist in hers and walked with me slowly- well, for a vampire anyway.

"So, what's the update from camp? Any news?" Yes, I thought. Actually a lot had happened at camp. Maria had already found two new recruits- the two that I had just been "training." She was preparing for a full, blown-out war. I wanted to tell Alice about Maria's plans, but I was afraid of what this information might do to her. She was probably already suffering enough physical pain from her situation; I didn't want to add guilt and emotional pain by telling her about the plans for war.

I replied with a lie. "Oh, you know. Same old routine; training, drills, some more training..." I instantly felt bad about lying to Alice, and I was grateful that our gifts weren't reversed so she could feel my regret. I silently hoped that when someone, somewhere once said that "Ignorance was Bliss", they knew what they were talking about.

Alice POV

I took another deep breath and assumed a yoga-like pose; I was cross-legged on the soft ground. I had my eyes closed, and I was focused. I had to be in order to get a vision nowadays. I had been paying very close attention to my reaction to not eating. When I'd seen my reflection in the glass surface of a pool that had separated from the river, I'd seen that my eyes were getting darker and darker. It was spreading through the whites of my eyes like a demonic force taking over. Not only were my eyes being affected, but my "sight" as well. I'd noticed that visions weren't coming frequently or involuntarily anymore. I had to think about something or someone to have a vision about them, and even then I had difficulty. But I couldn't think about any of that now. I needed complete focus to have a vision, and I need to have a vision soon.

I pulled up a picture of Jasper in my head and focused on that. I paid attention to each contour in his face, and I thought of his voice when he spoke. There! I thought happily as a vision appeared. Jasper looked flustered as he walked through the forest, with Maria at his heels. I mentally scowled, but ignored her for now. I need to find the sun, the sun the sun..... the sun! The vision ended as I lost focus, but I had gotten what I needed. Jasper was on his way to see me in... ? I looked up at the sun to see how long until Jasper would be here. 45 minutes?! I needed more time. I needed to get to work.

For the past few days I had been doing one thing, and that was meditating. I had been sitting here in this spot, trying desperately to control my emotions. I thought of everything that made me emotional: When I wanted to be sad, I thought of my sister out there somewhere... and when I wanted to be angry, I thought of Maria. I think that now I've come to master the art of controlling my emotions. Sure, it was hard at first. Every time I thought of Bella, I told myself she would fall in love with someone she could grow old with and have a bunch of kids with. But then remorse came as I realized that I wouldn't ever get to meet my future nieces and nephews, and I would never grow old and have kids with Jasper. But that didn't happen any more, because there was no room for emotion when you're keeping a secret. Honestly- how are you supposed to keep a secret from the one person who can tell when you're feeling guilty?!

I mean, I wish I didn't have to keep secrets from Jasper. But there's a time in everyone's life where they have to tell just a little white lie to keep from hurting the one you love. What he didn't know wouldn't hurt him, right?- at that thought I knocked on the bark of a tree. I didn't think I used to be a superstitious human, but when you're a vampire you tend to believe in the supernatural. All I know is that I love Jasper, so I can't tell him how much pain I'm in.

Darn it. I was doing so well... That was another good thing about meditation; it kept my mind from focusing on the agonizing burning feeling surging through my throat like some kind of acid reflux on steroids. As a moronic idea, I had actually tried to drink water just to see if it would put out the fire. It looked so cool and soothing, and it felt so good against my skin that I figured it had to feel just as good to my throat-- it didn't. After I had taken a sip, I had promptly spit the stuff out, revolted from the disgusting liquid that tasted terrible and- not only that -but also proceeded to make my throat ache more. It's been just over a week without eating, and while an experienced vampire like Jasper can withstand that long easily, I was a newborn. My strong, fresh muscles needed the kind of sustenance that I hadn't provided for them.

I waited out the last 42 minutes before Jasper would be there, anxiety building up in the pit of my stomach at the thought of putting my control to the test. Just thinking about Jasper's face, the one that mesmerized me, I doubted I'd be able to control my unsteady emotions.

I had just 2 minutes to go. As soon as I thought of what to do, I was already doing it (one of the perks of being a vampire, which I was still getting used to). I sprung up from where I was sitting and started running in one fluid motion. I stood exactly where I'd seen Jasper entering the meadow, trying to figure out the best hiding spot from his perspective. I saw an old tree with a trunk the size of a pillar. I ran behind it, completely hiding myself. I counted down until I heard Jasper's footsteps approaching. I closed my eyes and focused on staying calm and collected.

Finally, after he'd glanced around for about three seconds, I climbed up into the tree silently. I jumped lightly from branch to branch until I was in the tree directly behind Jasper. I jumped behind him before he could respond and reached up to wrap my hands around his eyes, and whispered, "Guess who?

I felt his face pull up in a smile before he reached up and captured one of my wrists in his hand, pulling me around to his front without protest. As he pulled me into an embrace, I noticed he kept his eyes close- probably to avoid seeing how I had been affected by not eating. I felt my emotions waver as I succumbed to the relief of being in his arms again. I tried to control my emotions again, focusing less on the intoxicating scent that surrounded me and more on controlling my emotions.

Always concerned for me, he whispered, "How are you?" into my ear. The reminder made the burning come back, but I pushed the thought into the back of my mind.

"Now I'm wonderful." It was true in some ways; I was always happier when I was with Jasper. But I wasn't wonderful- I was in pain. Ugh... there I go again.

Finally, Jasper pulled away from me, and I instantly missed being in his arms. His eyes widened as he took in my appearance, I could imagine his brain wrapping around the bruised-shadows under my eyes and the black spreading through my eyes. I knew what I looked like, but I was self-conscious anyway. As I put my hand to my face, I tried to control the worry in my emotions from showing. "What? What is it? Do I look that bad?" I said. I started walking towards the water, wanting to see if my appearance had changed since I had last looked at it. He pulled me back though before I could get away.

He kissed my forehead and said, "You are beautiful." Liar. I thought as I smiled and closed my eyes, hoping that if I couldn't see him, he wouldn't mesmerize me so much. I took his hand and started walking, hoping to talk about something other than my current condition.

"So, what's the update from camp? Any news?" I had been watching him, and this morning I had seen him take down two newborns that I didn't recognize. I had hoped at the time that these weren't what I thought they were, but in my mind I knew that these were the recruits that Jasper had warned me would inevitably be added to the army. In my heart, I was hoping Jasper would deny my suspicions.

"Oh, you know. Same old routine; training, drills, some more training..." I frowned to myself, hiding the hurt in my emotions as I realized he was lying to me. With a photographic memory, you don't just forget what people look like. Those two newborns were recruits, and he was helping to train them. I could sense it; I might not be an empath, but he was tense, wound up, as if preparing himself emotionally for battle. And I knew it as well as he did. There was a battle coming.


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