A/N: I can't even tell you how many times I wrote and re-wrote this chapter. I think it's clear that this fic is going to take me a lot longer to update than usual. I usually aim for weekly updates, but I think it's fair to say that the next few chapters will come in 10-14 day intervals. Hope you enjoy :)
Regina looked up from her novel when she felt Emma enter the room, their eyes meeting briefly before she looked away. She noticed the white, crinkled paper clutched tightly in Emma's hand, and her cheeks burned with the knowledge that Emma was now all too aware of one of her deepest secrets. Regina was still embarrassed, and she didn't want to have this discussion, no matter how much she knew they needed to. Even if she and Emma chose not to incorporate power play into their intimate relationship, they still needed to have this talk and to settle things between them. Knowing they needed to talk did not do anything to lessen the dread she felt, however.
Emma, noticing Regina's tight expression, immediately walked up to her lover and sat down next to her on the couch. She removed the pillow from Regina's lap and set her book down on the coffee table before pulling the woman into a long, tight hug. She poured everything she had into the embrace, wanting Regina to feel nothing but comfort and safety. Regina was stiff at first, but she melted into Emma's arms after a few seconds, losing herself in the warmth and security she was offered. Regina inhaled deeply, breathing in the scent of her lover, closing her eyes and focusing on the soothing up and down motion of Emma's gentle hand against her back.
"I love you," Emma breathed against her temple. "Thank you for writing this letter."
Regina, unsure of how to respond, simply nodded against Emma's strong shoulder. Emma pulled away slowly, reaching up to cup her cheek. When Regina looked away, Emma tilted her chin so that their eyes met.
"Don't do that, baby. I'm sorry for making you feel hurt and rejected. That's not at all what I wanted. Never. And I know you're embarrassed, but please don't be, okay? It's just me, and I'm never gonna judge you. I want what you want, remember?"
"I've never before spoken of this," Regina confessed after a moment. "It's terribly difficult and uncomfortable. I feel utterly exposed."
Emma, hearing the vulnerability in Regina's voice, cupped her cheek and kissed her softly on the lips. She stroked her thumb again the smooth, olive skin of Regina's jaw, pulling away after a moment to look her in the eyes.
"I know. And I'm sorry it's so hard for you, but I promise it's going to be okay. You've done the hardest part, right? You said it out loud. You finally faced it. And it's gonna be hard to go into details, to share more about what you want, but you've taken the first step. And trust me when I say that I really do want this with you, Regina. I don't want it to be hard for you, even though I know it will be, but I want you to know I'm going to be here every step of the way and I'm going to do everything I can do make it easier on you. I'm not gonna use any of this information against you, okay? I'm not going to use it to hurt you or to humiliate you. I'm going to use it to give you what you want, what you need, and to keep you safe. Okay?"
"Thank you."
Emma waited, hoping Regina would speak some more, but when she was met with silence, Emma opened the letter and flipped to one of the spots she'd wanted to discuss.
"Is it okay if we talk about it? Or do you need a minute?"
"No. We… it would be best if we discussed the letter now."
Regina knew that if they waited, she would retreat into herself and would not speak of this again. It was best to get it all out on the table sooner rather than later.
"Okay." Emma reached out and squeezed Regina's hand before turning back to the letter. "I didn't know- I had no idea you felt that way about Daniel. That he… did you and he do what we did?"
"In part, but to a much lesser degree."
"Will you tell me about it?"
Regina swallowed, tucking her hair behind her ear nervously. She looked down at her knees, rubbing her hand against the material of her jeans as she spoke.
"When I was young, I was timid, unsure of myself. I overthought everything and I was an incredibly anxious child. I preferred not to make decisions as I continuously questioned whether or not I was making the correct choice and would agonise for days when I was forced to decide something as simple as what colour would be most suitable for my ball gown. Mother did not help my fears and anxieties. In fact, she is likely the cause for them. She would criticise me relentlessly and reprimand me regularly for making, what she felt, was the wrong choice. It seemed I could never choose correctly; therefore, I became almost unable to form my own opinion. It was agony and induced great stress when I had to select something for myself.
"I felt safe, as well as incredible relief, when I was with someone in whom I could trust to make decisions for me. And Daniel… he was so kind, and gentle, and thoughtful. It was easy to feel secure with him, as I knew he would always select the choice that was most beneficial to us, to me. He continually put my needs before his own, and every time that he did, my trust in him grew. And as time passed, I grew to depend on him more and more, until it was entirely natural for me to follow his lead unquestioningly. He led and I followed, always. In nearly all aspects of our relationship. I was glad to. He read me so perfectly that it was easy to allow him to make decisions that affected both of us, especially when it came to our physical relationship."
When Regina flushed, looking away, Emma reached out and gently grasped her chin. She turned her lover's head gently, waiting until Regina finally met her eyes.
"Please don't be embarrassed."
"I can't help it."
"You have nothing to be embarrassed about."
"I feel as though I do."
"Why?"
"Because I am not supposed to be this way, Emma! I am not supposed show this weakness. I never meant for this to happen. I never meant for you to know…
"This town, the people within it, you, Henry… you all believe I am strong and confident and that I demand power and control. You believe I enjoy being in charge, that I would never wish to cede power to another. If you knew what I truly- if you only knew. You'd look at me as though I were incredibly weak. Or perhaps even silly. How could you take me seriously ever again?"
"Submitting to someone has nothing to do with weakness, Regina. It has everything to do with trust. You submit to someone you trust, to someone you know won't hurt you. It's not because you're weak."
Emma took a deep breath, looking into Regina's eyes and imploring her to believe her.
"When I look at you, I see a beautiful, confident, extraordinarily strong woman who trusts me enough to allow herself to be vulnerable, to lower her walls and hand over her carefully maintained control. Do you know how humbling that is? Not to mention erotic.
"I'm not looking at you any differently than I ever did before, Regina. Well, not in a bad way anyway. I look at you a little differently now because you're admitting to wanting to do things that I never dreamed would ever be possible with you. Things that I'd really, really like to do to you. With you. Looking at you, knowing you want me to take you in a way that I really freaking want, it doesn't make me think you're weak. If anything it makes me weak. Right in the knees."
Regina couldn't help the tugging at the corner of her lips when Emma tossed her a lopsided grin.
"That was a poorly executed joke."
"It was a joke, but only sort of. Do you know how hot it is to know you want me to top you, Regina? Do you know how sexy and exciting it is to me to know that you trust me enough to hand over that control? That you, Regina Mills, mayor of Storybrooke, single mother extraordinaire, probably the single, most powerful magic wielder in this town (Emma ignored Regina's protest of 'Rumple is far more capable') wants me to tie her up and fuck her?"
Emma shifted, her nipples hardening as they scraped against her bra when she moved. She was forced to swallow hard before continuing her train of thought, trying to ignore the stirring of arousal in her belly. God damn if talking about Regina's desire to submit didn't turn her on.
"You take control in every situation, we both know that. I know you've explained to me before that because of the shit you went through in the past with your mom and with Rumple and with all those shitty people who hurt you, now you feel safe when you have control and you decide what happens. You could only trust yourself to make decisions for you. But now, now you're telling me that you want to hand over that power over yourself to me. You want me to have control over you. Do you know what that tells me? It tells me you trust me completely, and that is a huge fucking turn on. And it's also really humbling.
"I've had these types of relationships in the past. I've been more than one person's Domme. I know you know about it because we've talked about it, but I want you to know that I've never wanted to top anyone as much as I've wanted to top you, Regina. But I never have, never even hinted at it, because I didn't think you'd want that. I honestly never thought you'd trust me enough because of how badly you've been burned in the past. But to know that you do… fuck, Regina." Emma took a deep breath. There was nothing quite so arousing as knowing that someone trusted you so implicitly that they were willing to cede all control over to you. And for someone like Regina, who trusted no one… It stirred something deep within Emma. "I really, really want it, Regina. I really want to be your Domme."
Regina took a deep breath before nodding.
"I do as well."
Emma took a moment to let those words sink in. I do as well. Emma shivered.
"Good. That's why I wanted to have this talk today," Emma said gently, tucking an errant hair behind Regina's ear. "So that we can do this safely."
"I know. You were correct to deny me the other day; I understand that now. You were looking out for my best interests, and I thank you for that. It just felt like a rejection at the time and it hurt. It still does, if I'm to be honest."
"I'm sorry, baby. I'm sorry that it hurts. I never want to hurt you. I was just trying to look out for you by stopping something that could have quickly and easily turned really scary for you."
"I know."
And Regina did. Emma took care of her in ways that no one else had. She did incredibly thoughtful things, things that reminded Regina that Emma was always looking out for her. Like in the winter, Emma would brush off Regina's car in the morning before leaving for work. She would hold her hand against Regina's belly before they crossed an intersection, checking both ways before then sliding her hand to Regina's lower back and guiding her across the street. When Regina had a headache, Emma would insist she take a painkiller, drink more water, and lay down on the couch while she made dinner. She brought Regina lunch, often, because the mayor would simply forget to eat as she powered through meeting after meeting, attended functions, or lost herself in budget proposals. Emma would even, at times, (gently) physically remove Regina from her desk when the woman refused to leave- despite the fact that she'd have been at work for over twelve hours. Regina would get irritated in those moments, but Emma pushed back, refusing to back down because she was looking out for her. And ultimately, Regina would cave and accede that Emma was right, that she was sore and hungry and needed to get away for the evening. Emma was constantly taking care of her, and it was for that reason that Regina felt so safe with her, so comfortable.
"I am never going to reject you, Regina. I promise you that. That night, if we would have played the way you wanted to, it would have broken one of my rules. And that is unacceptable," Emma said seriously. "I have many rules, and they're all in place to keep you safe. I will not allow us to break any of them, Regina, no matter how much you might want me to. Your safety is my number one priority. Nothing will ever take precedence over it."
When Regina nodded her understanding but didn't say anything more, Emma took the opportunity to continue her train of thought.
"My rules are there to make sure you're safe, that you're protected, and that your needs and wants are met. They're also there in order to ensure your boundaries are respected. I will never cross a line that you draw, Regina, and if you ask for something that I don't feel you're ready for, or that I think would hurt you, I'm gonna deny your request, just like I did Monday night. You asked me to do something that could have hurt you, and that is something that I'm never gonna allow. Every choice I make is about you, and that was an example of me choosing your safety over your want."
Regina nodded again, squeezing Emma's hand in thanks.
"I have some questions, but first I want you to tell me if you feel safe enough with me now to be open and honest."
Regina nodded.
"I do."
"If there's one thing I will always demand of you, Regina, it's that you're honest. This relationship won't work if you aren't, and I definitely can't have you submitting to me if you're not always telling me the truth. If I ever find out that you're lying or that you lied about something, I'm going to stop. I'll never punish you for being honest, but I will punish you if you lie to me."
"I understand."
"Good."
Emma reached forward and cupped Regina's cheek, kissing her softly on the lips before pulling back and smiling at her. When Regina smiled back, Emma decided to finally proceed with her questions.
"So, you've wanted this from the beginning?"
"Not entirely, no. Only as our relationship began to grow and I grew to trust you did these feelings make themselves known. And when I learned that you had participated in this type of relationship with others, when you told me that you had dominated lovers in your past, well," Regina paused, blushing, "of course my desires surfaced."
Emma smiled at Regina's reddened cheeks. It was adorable to see the woman blush, and, if Emma were honest, a real turn on too. She liked shy Regina, but unfortunately she only very rarely made an appearance in their relationship. Only when Regina felt especially safe did she allow herself to show such vulnerability, so these hidden moments were only shown when they were alone. And even then, they were rare.
"Will you tell me a little about your desires?" Emma finally asked.
Regina chewed her bottom lip as she contemplated her response. She pulled away, putting a little space between them in order to think. She took a moment of silence to work up her courage, playing with the creases on her pants before finally speaking.
"I enjoy being restrained. When you had my wrists pressed against the mattress and I couldn't move them, I enjoyed that very much." Regina's voice wavered at first, but her confidence grew as Emma nodded in encouragement. "I liked when you told me what you were going to do to me. It, um, it created anticipation and that was pleasurable. I liked it when you made demands of me- when you ordered that I tell you what I wanted, that I express to you how good it felt as you touched me. I also relished the fact that you did not allow me to remain silent when you asked a question, that you commanded that I answer you. I also liked that you punished me when I didn't do as you asked. And I… I enjoyed your praise. Very much."
She enjoys praise? And being restrained and punished? Fuck. Emma's panties just got much, much wetter than they already were. Her stomach clenched tightly as the possibilities of future scenarios popped up in her mind. There were endless scenes she would love to play out with Regina, but for now, she needed to get as much information as she could. The more details she had, the better she could plan out scenes that Regina would be sure to enjoy.
"Thank you for answering. I liked that you gave specific examples. Can you give me more examples of things you liked or tell me some things that you'd like me to do in the future, that maybe I haven't done?"
"Yes. I… I like when you praise me, as I stated. I enjoy when you slap my thighs or my backside," Regina's cheeks burned as she began confessing deeper secrets. "I would like you to tie me to the bed. I would like to be spread for you and for you to… to not allow me to hide from you." She looked down, rubbing her palms against her thighs. "This is very embarrassing."
"You're doing well, Regina. Please continue."
Regina felt her insides swell when Emma encouraged her, squeezing back when Emma grabbed her hand. With renewed determination, she continued.
"I have fantasies… that you 'force' me to endure things that I say I dislike but clearly enjoy. Or that you force me to obey rules you know I cannot or that are impossible to obey, so that you've then no choice but to punish me."
Emma's heart was beating a mile a minute. Fuck, this woman was fucking perfect. Emma was secretly somewhat of a sadist. She loved making demands of her subs that she knew they couldn't obey so that she'd get to punish them later for their disobedience. One of Emma's favourite fantasies was one that involved bending Regina over and spanking her for being a bad girl. To hear now that Regina was into the same thing… fuck.
"Such as?" Emma forced her voice to remain even, but she was beyond horny listening to Regina describe her desires. She could tell the woman was nervous and embarrassed, and damn if that didn't also secretly appeal to Emma's sadistic side. She wanted to keep her talking, wanted to continue watching Regina nervously lick her bottom lip and follow the blush as it crept from the woman's cheeks, down her throat, and spread over her chest. Emma stroked her thumb along Regina's fingers to support her as she spoke, wanting her to feel her support and encouragement as Regina opened up to her.
"Perhaps… you tie me to the bed and force me to pleasure you with my tongue, having informed me I am to remain still and not become aroused as you ride my mouth and touch my body. It would be impossible, of course, and when your hand moves between my legs, you discover that I'm unbearably wet. This, inevitably, would result in a punishment."
"Describe the punishment."
Regina licked her lips as she worked to calm her racing heart. It pounded heavily in her chest as she did as Emma instructed.
"Verbal reprimand. Or you'll flog me, refuse to allow me to climax until the following day." Regina chewed her bottom lip nervously. There was more to the fantasy, but she couldn't help the unbelievable embarrassment gripping her belly, stealing her ability to speak.
Emma, noticing the Mayor's desire to continue (she could see Regina opening her mouth slightly, the way she swallowed when she closed it), reached out with her free hand and gripped her knee.
"You're thinking something you'd like to share."
Regina nodded slowly.
"Why are you having trouble?"
"I'm feeling incredibly self-conscious."
"No one can hear you besides me, and we've already established that I will never judge you. I'm here to learn as much as I can about your fantasies, not to make you feel ashamed. If there's something I can do to make you feel safer or if you need reassurance, I can do that. Do you need me to reassure you or make you feel safer?"
"No. I feel safe, just slightly embarrassed."
"Do you need to stop?"
"No."
"Would you like to stop?"
"No," Regina said softly.
And she really didn't. She liked telling Emma about her desires, and she liked the way Emma's attention was focused solely on her. She could feel the intensity of Emma's gaze as it burned into her as she spoke. She could feel the intensity with which Emma was looking at her, listening to her, and Regina liked that Emma was watching her so closely. She liked that she currently wielded every ounce of Emma's attention. Part of Regina also secretly liked that Emma was insisting she open up about something that embarrassed her so thoroughly.
"Then you will tell me what's on your mind now, please."
Regina swallowed, working up her courage to finally voice the one thing she had never before said aloud.
"Don't be mistaken. It was phrased kindly, but you don't have a choice, Regina. You will tell me."
Regina looked away, digging her nails into her palm.
"I like to be called names," Regina whispered. "Certain names, after becoming aroused, wet, when I shouldn't have. For enjoying things I was told not to enjoy. I like to be punished for being a- a-"
"Slut?"
"Yes."
Regina looked at the floor, cheeks flushed, her heart pounding as she finally admitted the truth. She felt utterly exposed, unable to look anywhere but at her feet. When she felt Emma's hand tug on her wrist, asking her to turn to face her, Regina couldn't do it. She was overcome with a wave of shyness.
"Look at me, Regina. Right now."
The steely voice cut through Regina and caused her to react instinctively. There was no room for argument in that tone, and she turned instantly. When she met Emma's gaze, Regina's stomach clenched at the obvious desire in the other woman's eyes. Emma's pupils were dilated, blown black with arousal, and she was clearly trying to regulate her breathing. She was almost panting though, and the knowledge that Emma was aroused tugged deep at Regina's belly.
"You're fucking perfect, you know that?"
Regina reddened further, chuckling slightly under Emma's insistent tone. They sat quietly for a moment before Regina's suddenly spoke up again, admitting another of her desires.
"I have often thought about being… used. By you."
"Oh? Can you continue that thought for me?"
"I," Regina paused, taking a deep breath for courage, "I often fantasize about you using my body for your pleasure, all the while you are telling me that I'm yours to use as you see fit. That I'm present only for your pleasure. I quite enjoy the idea that you- that you objectify me, that you tell me that you're not being interested in my wants or my pleasure. Perhaps you handle me a little roughly, speak to me harshly."
Emma knew for a fact that after they finished this talk, she was going to need a moment alone. She had gotten off more than once on the thought of pinning Regina down, of telling her she was a whore for enjoying the way that Emma used her body. In the fantasies, she often manipulated Regina's body in a way that she never would have in real life (well, perhaps now she would…), and Regina would encourage her, would beg Emma to use her. In these fantasies, Regina was always dripping for it, leaking like a sieve as she was spread open for Emma and pleading with her to do whatever she wanted with her body.
Emma's mind raced through her vast repertoire of fantasies that involved Regina, but she was suddenly all too aware that she didn't know what her limits were. Just how roughly could she use Regina? How much was too much? It was vitally important to know what Regina's boundaries were, so Emma decided to ask her.
"Will you tell me some limits? Some boundaries?"
"Alright. I don't wish to feel pain, true pain. I know you can be quite eager when it comes to my breasts," Regina teased, shaking her head at Emma's wolfish grin, "but I don't like true pain, nor would I like you to ever hit me so hard as to leave a bruise. I do, however, enjoy seeing the evidence of your forceful grip upon my skin. That is acceptable, and encouraged. I simply do not want to be struck with such force that a mark is left."
Emma nodded. Not that she ever would have done that to begin with, but she wanted to encourage Regina to continue.
"I will never want to involve wax or things of that nature. I don't want to feel truly degraded or humiliated. A little humiliation is something I enjoy. However, I do not want to feel genuinely ashamed. I know I will never want to participate in a threesome or-or an exchange of partners. I will never want to be given to another Dom. I understand that some people participate in exchanging partners. However, I know I will never want to do such a thing."
"Good. I won't either. I don't share," Emma growled, a possessive hand gripping Regina's thigh. "This body is mine and there is no way in hell I am letting anyone else touch it."
Regina nodded eagerly. She really, really liked the sound of that, of being Emma's.
"Will you tell me some things that please you?" Regina asked, after a moment of quiet.
"Definitely. But I'm going to be perfectly clear here: if any of the things I mention are things that scare you, don't interest you, or that you just don't want to do, we're not going to do them, ever. Okay?"
"Okay."
"A lot of the things you mentioned are things I like doing: spanking, talking dirty, calling you names, pretending to use your body for my pleasure. I'm going to make it clear now though that it's a game. I will always make sure that you enjoy what I'm doing. I may be using your body, but in the end, I'm making every decision with your pleasure in mind. Every choice I make will be about you, always."
When Regina nodded in acknowledgement, Emma continued.
"I also like giving commands, making you beg, praising you when you behave and punishing you when you don't. My favourite form of punishment is spanking you with my hand or with a paddle and making you count each hit, or forcing you to do something you don't really like doing… like staying silent while I touch you or not letting you come. I'll expect a thank you for every punishment I deliver, but we'll talk more about that later.
"I like you to kneel, call me 'Ma'am', and you will respond to every question I ask and you will obey every command I give you, unless it makes you uncomfortable or feel unsafe. Going with that thought, I'll always expect you to be honest with me, Regina. I know I said it earlier, but it's important, so I'm saying it again. The only way I can keep you happy, keep you safe, and make sure you enjoy the experience is if you're completely honest with me."
Regina held Emma's eye contact, nodding the second she was finished speaking.
"I know. I- I understand how important it is to be honest when we are … playing."
"Good. You're trusting me to take control of your body and I'm trusting you to be honest with me at all times. What happens if you break that trust and you lie to me?"
"We stop playing."
"Good girl." Emma reached out and stroked Regina's cheek affectionately. "In every healthy Dom/sub relationship, there is a safeword. Do you know what that is?"
"Yes."
"What is it?"
"It's a mutually agreed upon word that is used to halt a scene."
"Why would you halt a scene?"
"If one of us feels unsafe or does not enjoy something that is occurring."
"Exactly. You can also use it when you need a break or you need to check in. I will always be watching you, doing my best to tune into you and to observe your physical reactions, but that isn't always enough. I can't read your mind or know what's going on up here," Emma stated with a smile, lightly tapping Regina's temple. "You might be in distress and I'm not picking up on it, which is why we need a safeword so that you can let me know you're not okay. Have you thought of one?"
"No."
"Then you're going to think of one for me and you're going to tell me what it is. Before we ever play, there's going to be a definite safeword. The other night, I told you to tell me to 'stop' or to tell me 'no' if you didn't like something. Now, I'm telling you that I want you to think of a specific word that would never be said between us while we were having a scene. That way, the second you say the word, I know we need to stop. And I will always stop, Regina. Always. I'm going to get off on topping you, yeah, and I'm really looking forward to getting to play out some of your fantasies, but this is all about you. And the second you stop liking it is the second I stop liking it, okay?"
Regina nodded, Emma's grave tone conveying the seriousness of her words.
"Alright."
Emma looked at Regina for a long moment, wanting her words to sink in. When she was satisfied that Regina seemed to grasp the importance of her message, she nodded once.
"How are you doing?" Emma asked. "Do you need a break?"
"No." Then Regina paused before adding, "Perhaps we could get a glass of water though?"
"Of course."
Emma got up, holding out her hand and taking Regina's in her own. She led the way to the kitchen, gently pressing Regina against the island, indicating that she wanted her to stay put. Regina took the hint, staying in place and smiling softly when Emma pressed her lips against her temple before moving to the cupboard. She watched the blonde as she moved to the fridge, pouring her a tall glass of water and then handing it over. Regina gulped it down gratefully, the liquid cooling her and calming her stomach. While she was incredibly aroused, her stomach was also riddled with knots. It wasn't that she was worried or scared, but she had never spoken so openly about such a private subject, and she was a touch apprehensive about being so exposed. Emma had made her feel safe though, secure, and for that she was incredibly appreciative. She never would have been able to speak so freely, so easily, without her lover's calming presence.
"Better?"
"Yes, thank you."
Emma took the glass back, placing it in the dishwasher. She then made her way over to Regina, wrapping the woman in her arms and nuzzling her throat.
"You okay?"
"Yes. I am."
"You're quiet."
"I'm simply processing. I've never before admitted these desires to another, and although you've made me feel comfortable and safe, I still feel embarrassed and a little unnerved."
"Can I do anything to help?"
Regina looked at her, smiling softly.
"Simply comforting me as you are is of great help."
"Good," Emma said, squeezing Regina tight and tickling her neck with her nose.
"Emma!" Regina protested through giggles. "Stop!"
"Nope."
Emma pinned Regina to the island, lightly tickling her sides as they both laughed. She let up once she had Regina in tears of laughter, kissing the woman's cheek affectionately. They'd had an incredibly open and honest talk, and she knew it had been difficult for Regina. Regina had been brave though, had pushed herself to expose parts of herself that she'd kept hidden from the world, and Emma felt unbelievably humbled that Regina chose to share those secrets with her. Emma's heart swelled and she was filled with affection for the woman in her arms, snuggling her close as she poured all the love and tenderness she could in the embrace. She held Regina close as she breathed in her scent, rubbing her back gently and kissing her softly.
"I love you," she murmured against Regina's throat.
"I love you too, darling."
Emma led them back to the couch after several more minutes of hugging, pulling Regina into her arms as they sat.
"Will you help me think of a safeword?" Regina suddenly asked.
"I will if you can't think of anything. I'd like you to try on your own though. Your safeword should be something easy for you to remember, which is why you should be the one to come up with it."
"I've no idea what word to use."
"There's no rush."
Regina bit her bottom lip.
"But, I had hoped we could… tonight."
"Oh?" Emma asked, eyebrow raised. Her heart thudded in her chest, excited at the prospect of playing so soon with Regina.
"Yes."
"Then you had better come up with something or else we won't be able to."
Regina looked disappointed, and the brunette's expression tugged at Emma's heart. She hated seeing her lover in such a state, so she weighed her options. They could play a little now, a simple scene to give Regina a little taste and to perhaps aide her along in her quest to think of a word. Emma had something in mind anyway, a small scene that would serve as a brief introduction to what their future might hold. She considered if it would hurt or frighten Regina, and Emma decided that it wouldn't, not if she reminded Regina that she could say 'no' at any time. For now, 'stop' would be her safeword.
"Give me the cushion next to you, please."
Regina looked at Emma curiously before doing as she was asked. She watched as Emma dropped it onto the floor between her feet, wondering what in the world she was up to.
"Get up and stand in front of me, facing me."
Regina frowned in confusion, but did as she was told. She got up and stood before Emma, who looked up at her with a pleased, but stern expression.
"I'd like to try something now. Your safeword for the time being will be 'stop'. If at any point you don't like something or you feel uncomfortable, I want you to say 'stop'. Understood?"
"Yes."
"Good. Now, kneel on this pillow."
Emma's stomach dropped with arousal the second Regina kneeled before her. She looked so good on her knees, cheeks flushed, doing as she was told. Desire pooled low in Emma's belly as she reached out and stroked her lover's cheek, smiling at her.
"Good girl."
Emma pulled her hand away, regarding Regina seriously.
"We're going to establish a few rules now. Are you ready?"
"Yes," Regina answered breathily.
"First rule: I expect you to be honest at all times. If I as you a question, you'll answer me honestly, even if the answer embarrasses you or you think it will displease me. Is that clear?"
"Yes."
"Second rule: You address me as Ma'am. If I ask you a question, you'll answer me yes, Ma'am or no, Ma'am. Understood?"
"Yes." Regina then quickly added 'Ma'am' when Emma narrowed her eyes.
"Third rule: You will never, ever do anything that makes you feel unsafe, uncomfortable, or uneasy. You will safeword and we will stop immediately. Is that clear?"
Regina held Emma's gaze. Her eyes were sharp, steely, and it was clear that there would be no room for negotiation. Regina swallowed hard before nodding.
"It's clear, Ma'am."
"Good. Do you feel uncomfortable right now?"
"No, Ma'am."
"Would you like to stop what we are doing?"
"Definitely not. Ma'am."
Emma bit hard on her tongue to concentrate against her racing heart. Fuck, Regina looked good like this. She wanted to grip the back of the woman's neck and plunge her tongue into her mouth, force it into every nook and cranny until Regina was left as breathless and as horny as Emma was right now.
"If that changes, I want you to tell me," Emma said slowly. "Now, I have something I'd like you to do for me, pet."
"Okay," Regina responded softly.
"I'm going to move to the other end of the room, go to the laptop, and check my emails. You're going to stay in this position, looking straight ahead at the wall, while you think of a safeword for me. I don't care what word you choose. It doesn't matter if it seems simple, or silly, or weird. It can be a word, a place, a name. It can be a verb or just a random statement. But I want you to think something that will be easy for you to remember. Do you understand?"
"Yes."
"Yes what?" Emma demanded.
"Yes, Ma'am," Regina immediately corrected, fire burning in her belly at Emma's displeased look.
"Better. If at any time you become uncomfortable or you don't like this anymore, you're going to use your safeword and the scene ends. Do you remember your safeword?"
"Yes, Ma'am."
"What is it?"
"It's 'stop', Ma'am."
"Good." Emma got up, looking down at Regina when she was finally standing. Fuck. The sight of Regina on her knees was one that Emma had been fantasizing about ever since they'd gotten together. To see her now… Emma definitely needed to get away for a minute to calm her roaring libido.
Emma got up, making her way to the desk at the other end of the room. She powered up the laptop, her eyes drifting over to where her lover was still kneeling, staring at the wall before her. Emma's mind raced as she watched her. Regina was subbing for her. Regina was kneeling for her. Regina was right there, right now, on her knees, thinking of a safeword because she wanted to play. She wanted to sub for Emma.
"Fuck," Emma mouthed behind the laptop screen, typing in the password and waiting for the home screen to appear.
