Vir Cotto scurried after his superior, panting at the effort it took to keep up with Londo's purposeful stride. What had started out for Vir as a perfectly normal trip to visit Lennier in Medlab, a trip he had been taking every couple of days, had turned into panic when Londo had suddenly announced that he was coming, too. Vir, who knew that Londo was not exactly Lennier's favorite person, had tried everything he could think of to talk him out of it without letting on that Lennier was less than fond of the Centauri ambassador. In Londo's mind, he and Lennier were friends. Vir happened to know that this opinion was based on exactly one night of playing cards, which if memory served had ended in a bar fight and Lennier taking the blame for something that had not at all been his fault. And much had happened since that night, and none of it had served to bolster Lennier's respect for Londo in any way.
Vir had to admit that Lennier's dislike of Londo did make him a little sad. Londo was loud, annoying, drunk all the time, quite needy, and made questionable moral choices on a regular basis. But despite all of this, Vir did care about him. Londo was lonely, and Vir didn't like to see people lonely. And Lennier was a genuinely good person, which was why Londo had targeted him for an attempt at friendship – the rather desperate ambassador had known that the polite young Minbari would be very unlikely to turn him down. Instead, however, Lennier had built up a quiet resentment for Londo over time – a resentment which Londo, of course, had no idea existed. Vir understood why Lennier felt that way about Londo, and he supposed he could not really blame him. But he did not have to like it.
However, that matter was of less importance right now, because Londo was utterly convinced that he was going to go and visit Lennier at that moment, and Vir really did not think that was a good idea, a fact that he tried fervently to explain.
"Londo, I just don't know if Lennier is going to be feeling up to having all these visitors yet. It's probably for the best if you wait a few days."
"You were going to visit him, and have been for several days now," replied Londo, with the pedantic tone of a parent explaining something to a child for the five hundredth time. "If he is well enough to see you, then surely he can handle little old me."
Vir heaved an internal sigh of frustration. Londo feigning humility was perhaps the least convincing act he had ever seen. Vir frantically wracked his brain for excuses that would convince Londo to abandon his quest without hurting his feelings.
"But…I have only been going for short periods, just a few minutes at a time. He tires very easily. And…Londo, please just stop walking for a minute so I can talk to you."
To Vir's mild surprise, the ambassador did finally stop. Londo turned to face him with a look that said Vir's next excuse had better be a good one.
"Londo, you know Lennier. He's…well, he's Minbari. Their dignity and honor are so important to them, and I know Lennier would want as few people as possible to see him like this. It's already been very hard on him, what with having to be in Medlab and being too sick to take care of himself. As…as his friend, wouldn't you rather save him from further humiliation?"
Vir thought it was a rather well thought out excuse. By appealing to Londo's sense of mercy, he hoped that his employer would feel as though he had power over the situation, and that might obliquely convince him to give up his resolve. But of course, Vir would not be so lucky.
"Yes, Vir. But as his friends, would it not be better to let him know he has our support and our good wishes? I should think spending all that time in Medlab would bore a bright, active mind like his into another dimension – surely having someone to talk to will do him good."
You mean someone to talk at him, thought Vir, his heart sinking as Londo turned on his heel and continued his directed march toward Medlab. Vir hurried after him, praying that at the very least Delenn would be there to defend her poor aide from the overbearing good wishes of the great and bombastic Londo Mollari.
Vir caught up to Londo just as they entered Medlab. Doctor Franklin was just coming out of his office, and while he was doubtlessly accustomed to seeing Vir around quite often by that point, he seemed mildly surprised that Londo was with him.
"Ambassador. Something I can do for you?"
"No, thank you, Doctor. Vir and I are here to visit Mr. Lennier…"
As Londo was engaged in his brief conversation with the doctor, Vir scampered away down the hall of the general ward. When he reached Lennier's room, he looked in the window and saw that his friend was alone, sitting propped up on his pillows, his nose buried in The Three Musketeers. Frantically, Vir rapped on the window with his knuckles. Lennier looked up immediately, smiling when he saw his friend. Vir gestured wildly in the direction of where his employer stood talking with Doctor Franklin and mouthed "LONDO! LONDO!" as emphatically as he could. After a second's contemplation, Lennier's eyes widened in alarm. He quickly rested the book pages-down over his lap and then laid down, pulled his blanket over his chest, folded his arms across his torso, closed his eyes, and remained still. Vir sighed with relief just as Londo approached.
"Well then, Vir, shall we go in and see how our good and dear friend is faring?"
Vir shook his head emphatically and motioned for Londo to look through the window. "He's asleep, Londo. We can't wake him."
Londo peered through the glass, and finally Vir saw his determination deflate. The ambassador's shoulders slumped, and Vir could not help but feel bad for him. Londo really did just want to be a good friend. But Lennier was uncomfortable enough around Londo that, after what he had been through recently, it just did not seem fair to condemn him to any interaction with the overzealous ambassador.
"Ah," said Londo, much more quietly now. "Yes, I suppose you are right. We must let our friend get his rest." A sad smile played on his lips. "He does look rather peaceful, doesn't he?" There was a fondness in his voice that almost made Vir regret his part in the deception.
"All right," sighed Londo, turning away from the window. "Another time, perhaps. Come, Vir, there is nothing more we can do here."
Vir held up an index finger. "Actually…" He thought quickly. "…While I'm here, I ought to make an appointment for my annual checkup. It's been over a year, as the doctor keeps reminding me. I'll join you in a few minutes."
Londo raised an eyebrow. "A checkup? Pah. Centauri don't need checkups. There is nothing that can ail us that a bottle of good Brivari cannot fix." But then he glanced once more through the window at Lennier, who was still putting on his best performance of a peacefully sleeping convalescent. "But then again, I suppose I should not take the health of my attaché for granted. I imagine Delenn is having quite a difficult time without hers for so long. Make your appointment; join me in my quarters when you are finished."
"Thank you, Londo," said Vir respectfully, and he made to head in the direction of the receptionist. However, as soon as Londo had left Medlab, Vir hurried back to Lennier's room and stuck his head in the doorway.
"All clear. He's gone."
Lennier opened his eyes and sat up as Vir approached and settled into the chair next to the bed.
"Thank you for that," Lennier said with a smile. "I'm afraid I am not quite feeling up to dealing with Londo just now."
"I thought you might say something like that," replied Vir with an unhappy sigh. Lennier regarded him inquiringly.
"He means well, Lennier. I know he's done some bad things, and you have every right to be upset with him for that. But he cares about you."
Lennier scoffed softly. "I have never particularly gotten that impression from Londo. I do distinctly remember nursing a black eye on his behalf, though."
His reaction upset Vir more than he'd thought it would. "Lennier, you didn't see him. When we thought you were dying, he was genuinely really upset. He sees you as a friend, and he's not asking anything of you – not anymore. I'm not saying you have to do anything now – you absolutely deserve to have all the time you need to recover before you deal with Londo. But at some point, maybe…maybe give him a chance? Just a little one?" Vir held up his forefinger and thumb, spacing them a hair's breadth apart, to illustrate his point.
Lennier's eyes flashed, though his tone was as calm as ever. "With respect, Vir, why should I? What has Londo ever done for me, or for anyone for that matter?"
"Because friendship isn't about owing something to someone." Lennier lowered his eyes, obviously contemplating Vir's meaning. Vir continued. "The Religious Caste are all about understanding right? Can't you try to understand Londo just a little bit?"
"Oh, I've tried to understand Londo. And I've failed miserably," muttered Lennier. But Vir wasn't going to give up.
"Lennier," he said plaintively, "Londo's my friend. I care about him. He was really disappointed when he couldn't talk to you just now, and I don't like to see my friends hurting. So if you don't do it for him, or for yourself, could you do it for me? Please?"
For a moment, Lennier looked as though he was going to protest. But then he sighed resignedly and hugged Delenn's shawl close to his body.
"All right, Vir," he murmured, running the soft red and gold cloth through his fingers. "If it is important to you, then I will give Londo a chance, as you say. And I am sorry if my previous attitude toward him caused you pain. You are my friend, Vir, and the last thing I want to do is hurt you."
"I know." Vir pulled his friend into an embrace, making sure to be gentle on his yet fragile body. He heard Lennier catch his breath softly, but then the little Minbari warmly returned the hug. When they separated after several seconds, Lennier was smiling.
"Thank you," said Vir. "This means a lot."
"You are welcome," replied Lennier. "And…thank you. Even though I spent the majority of my life in temple, apparently I occasionally forget that we are all children of the universe, and therefore we all deserve a chance. Maybe even more than one. You reminded me of that."
Vir smiled wide enough to reveal his pointed front teeth, unable to suppress his joy at the fact that these two people whom he cared very much about might finally get along. They would never be the best of friends, he knew – Vir was a dreamer, but not delusional. But maybe Lennier would not be so palpably uncomfortable around Londo anymore, and Londo's attempts at friendship would actually be reciprocated, at least a little. Satisfied with that particular situation for now, he felt finally able to move on to actually visiting his friend.
"How've you been feeling?"
"Better. I'm getting a little stronger every day. Doctor Franklin says that in a couple of days I should be able to get out of bed a bit." His eyes danced with enthusiasm, reminding Vir intensely of the very first time they had met in the bar. Here was the Lennier he knew. His heart felt warm.
"That's wonderful news!"
"It won't be anything grand – just short walks up and down the hall, with assistance. But it will be such a welcome change." The excitement faded a bit from his eyes then, and Vir found himself longing for it to return. "I am so desperately tired of being confined to bed. I want more than anything to go back to work. I know I am nowhere near well enough to do so, but I cannot help but wish I were at Delenn's side once more. It is like my purpose has been taken away from me, and I am less than whole without it." He hugged the shawl around himself again and stared down at his blankets.
"And you miss her, don't you?" asked Vir softly, reading the meaning between Lennier's words. Lennier startled a bit at the forwardness of the question, but then nodded.
"I know I shouldn't. She has given so much of her time and of herself to me since I've been ill. I have kept her from her work, her life, everything. But even so, I cannot help but wish she were here with me." He hugged his knees to his chest, looking guilty.
"It's okay. You've been through an awful lot, Lennier. It's normal to want comfort when you're not feeling like yourself. And I think Delenn understands that."
"I know she does," said Lennier softly, his gaze distant and full of love. "Delenn has been so indescribably kind and caring throughout this whole thing." He focused on Vir then. "And I'm grateful for your company too, Vir. It is nice to know I have friends who care about me."
Vir wondered how someone as nice as Lennier could ever have doubted that he had friends who cared about him, but he supposed his friend did have a bit of a tendency toward insecurity. He smiled reassuringly.
"Of course I care, and so do lots of other people. I mean, we're all stuck in this tin can together. We might as well be a team."
Lennier chuckled. "Don't let Captain Sheridan hear you call it a 'tin can'. He might take offense." But his eyes shone with gratitude.
Vir nodded toward the copy of The Three Musketeers that was still spread open across Lennier's lap. "How's the book?"
"It's very exciting!" exclaimed Lennier. "There's adventure and friendship and things about religion and history. I am very much enjoying it. I must thank you again for it – it is making my time in bed far more bearable."
"You're welcome, although as I said before, Commander Ivanova deserves credit for the recommendation."
"Did someone say my name?" As if on cue, the Commander poked her head through the open door, startling both of the room's occupants.
"Hi, Commander!" exclaimed Vir cheerfully.
Lennier triangled his hands and bowed as best he could from his place in the bed. "Commander Ivanova, what nice surprise. Is there something I can do for you?"
"Actually, now that you mention it…" Ivanova stepped fully into the room, and they could see that in her arms she bore a very large tray of chocolate chip cookies. Franklin followed her in, nibbling happily on a cookie of his own.
Vir's eyes widened. "That is a lot of chocolate chip cookies."
"Yeah," Ivanova acknowledged. "I had a rare afternoon off, so I decided to bake. And when I bake, I bake."
"No kidding," said Vir weakly. The tantalizing smell wafting from the tray was beginning to severely compromise him.
The commander continued. "Of course, once I'd finished my massive baking endeavor, I found myself with a problem. I have all these cookies and no one to share them with. So I, being the good and nice and kind person that I am, decided to distribute them around the station. I am the Santa Claus of baked goods, and today everyone loves me! I should do this more often."
"Yes, you should," agreed Vir. His mouth was watering so much by this time that he had to swallow.
"Oh, stop toying with him," chuckled Franklin, taking another bite. His eyes danced with amusement.
"Don't tell me what to do! I'm cutting you off. No more cookies for you, ever." Franklin threw up his hands in surrender. Ivanova rolled her eyes, but then turned back to Vir and laughed as she held out the tray. "Would you like a cookie, Vir?"
"Yes, please!" Vir chose a particularly chip-filled treat from the platter and immediately bit into it. "Mmmmmmm. This is delicious. Thank you, Commander."
Ivanova chuckled. "You're welcome, Vir." She then turned and offered the tray to Lennier. "Would you like one, Lennier?"
Lennier looked over at Franklin, his eyes wide and hopeful.
"Doctor, may I?" His voice was so plaintive and his expression so pleading that had Vir been the doctor, he would have found the request impossible to deny, even if Lennier's life had depended upon him not eating a cookie.
"I don't think just one will hurt you." Franklin winked, shoved the last of his cookie into his mouth, and then headed back to work. Lennier delicately selected his own cookie and then sniffed at it experimentally.
Ivanova raised an eyebrow. "You eat it, Lennier."
"Yes, of course," said Lennier hesitantly. "It is only…I have never before eaten a…what did you say they were called? A chocolate chip cookie."
Ivanova's eyes widened in disbelief. "You've never had a chocolate chip cookie? Ever? In your whole life?"
"We do not have them on our world, and while I have tried many foods from other cultures during my time on Babylon 5, this one appears to have slipped under my radar. Although I must say, it smells wonderful." He took what seemed to Vir to be an infuriatingly small bite, and suddenly his eyes went wide and bright.
"This tastes amazing!" He quickly took another bite and chewed it with his eyes closed, looking positively blissful.
Ivanova stared at him, looking absolutely flabbergasted. "I cannot believe you have never had a chocolate chip cookie before. That my cookie is the first you have ever eaten."
"I am assuming these little spots are the chocolate chips?" Lennier asked, pointing.
Ivanova stopped dead. "Lennier."
"Yes Commander?" The young Minbari looked a bit concerned at the seriousness in her voice.
Ivanova spoke very slowly. "Lennier, please don't tell me you have never had chocolate."
Lennier shook his head innocently. "No, this is all a new experience for me. But it is a good one. Thank you very, very much, Commander. Although I know that the healthy meals the doctor has been prescribing are important to my recovery, this is a vast improvement over Medlab food."
"Wow. I just…wow." Ivanova turned to Vir. "He's never had chocolate. How has he never had chocolate?"
Vir just shrugged, wishing she would offer him another cookie.
Ivanova blinked a couple of times and then shook her head vigorously. "Okay. I'm good. I'm over it. How're you doing, Lennier?"
"Much better than I was. Thank you for asking," replied Lennier with his characteristic politeness and giving a little bow. "Vir told me you recommended The Three Musketeers for me to read, and I must commend you on and thank you for that recommendation. I am very much enjoying it."
"Good, good. I like it a lot, too." She paused for a moment and then chuckled softly. "You know Lennier, you remind me a little bit of Aramis."
Lennier smiled softly. "I will not deny that I have drawn that parallel just a bit myself. Aramis seems an upstanding individual, brave and honorable and a good friend. There are characters I would less like to be compared to."
"Yeah. You're right. Anyway, I have many more cookies left, and therefore the opportunity to make many more people love me. I'm glad you're doing better, Lennier." Ivanova turned toward the door, and Vir's heart sank at the vanishing prospect of another cookie. But his hopes were immediately restored when she turned back around.
"Lennier?"
"Yes, Commander?"
"Do you know if Delenn has ever eaten chocolate before?"
Lennier looked thoughtful. "I am not sure. I have never seen her eat it, nor heard her mention it."
"Oh wow. Okay. Um, here's a tip. You want to make Delenn happy?"
Lennier blinked curiously. "Yes, of course."
Ivanova grinned. "Trust me. Hand her some of this stuff, and you'll be her favorite person."
Lennier opened and closed his mouth in surprise and confusion as Ivanova walked out. Then he turned to Vir, looking incredulous.
"I cannot believe I have never heard of this seemingly magical substance before."
Vir furrowed his brow thoughtfully. "Do you think it would work with Londo?"
Lennier continued to progress in his recovery with the support of his friends. Doctor Franklin told him it would be beneficial for him to start taking very short walks, just up and down the hallway in Medlab. The first time he had tried to stand, he had been much too overzealous. Luckily, both Delenn and Doctor Franklin had been supporting him, so they lowered him gently back onto the bed when dizziness overwhelmed him. Once the room had stopped spinning, he tried again, more slowly this time; to his delight he was able to remain standing this time, though he had needed to lean heavily on the doctor and Delenn. (He had not wanted to use Delenn for support at first, but she had reassured him that she still had enough of her Minbari strength that he could not hurt her. And who was he to argue with her?) With their help, Lennier had managed to make it a whole twenty feet before he suddenly began to feel quite weary. By the time they made it back to his room, it was all he could do to collapse on the bed, humiliated by how weak he was. Franklin, however, brought his spirits up by saying that tiring so easily was perfectly normal when one had been as seriously ill as Lennier had been, and that Lennier had actually done very well. But it was Delenn's happy smile that had made the exhaustion truly worth it.
However, aside from his daily turns about the hallway, Lennier remained confined strictly to bed. It was not an ideal situation, and he continued to lament having to remain away from his work and his service to Delenn for so long. But his friends made his bed rest far more bearable, a fact for which he was grateful. Mr. Garibaldi had popped his balding head in once to say hello, and Vir came to visit at least every couple of days. Once Lennier had finished The Three Musketeers, Vir loaned him Londo's copy of The Great Centauri Republic: A Magnificent History. Lennier had been excited to read the large tome, which provided a combination of history and other cultures, two things in which he was very interested. However, he had his concerns about the source of the book.
"Vir, did you ask Londo if I could borrow this?"
Vir shrugged. "No. He won't miss it."
"How do you know?"
"Because he won't even realize it's gone. Londo isn't exactly the reading type. He owns that book for show. I doubt he's ever even opened it."
"So I take it your histories are more commonly passed down verbally?"
"Have you ever known a Centauri to not talk?"
He had a point.
Delenn, although she had needed to resume her ambassadorial duties, came to visit him every morning and evening without fail, and more often if she could make it. She would tell him of her day and ask about what he was reading, and they would just sit and talk, like close friends should. No matter how lonely Lennier got when Delenn was not there, his anticipation of the next time he would see her carried him through and gave him strength. They finally had the closeness he had always desired, and Lennier knew that he would go to the brink of death a million times if he had to, if only it meant he and Delenn could be that close forever. But because of what Dukhat had told him, he knew he would not have to. However, Lennier still had difficulty wrapping his brain around the concept of he and Delenn being equals – he still considered Delenn to be his superior, and he still did not wish to trouble her with the problems and worries of his life because she had so many other concerns. But he reveled in her presence and the comfort she gave him. From her, he drew the strength he needed to recover.
After over three weeks in Medlab, once Lennier had finished his course of intravenous antibiotics and was strong enough to walk to and from the bathroom on his own, the doctor finally discharged him from the hospital and allowed him to return to his quarters to finish convalescing. He was still required to come to Medlab every day – a nurse would come fetch him in a wheelchair – to receive an intramuscular injection of Pseudocyanin ubique antibodies and have the antibody levels in his blood tested, as well as allow the doctor to examine him and monitor his recovery. While Lennier was not particularly thrilled with the idea of being wheeled about the halls of Babylon 5 on a daily basis, he was more than willing to make this compromise if it meant he could return to his quarters where it was quiet and there was not the bustle of daily Medlab life. And he was so very ready to sleep in his own bed – his blessedly comfortable bed, wonderfully firm and at a perfect forty-five degree angle. He had missed it very much.
Delenn accompanied him when he was moved to his quarters to help him settle in. He attempted to go to the kitchen to pour a glass of water for himself and to offer her one as well – now that he was back in his own quarters, he could at least begin to offer Delenn the hospitality she deserved. But he had barely made it through the door when Delenn caught on to his plan.
"Do not think you are going anywhere but straight to bed, Lennier," she said with simultaneous sternness and affection. "Do not forget, the doctor said you are still on strict bed rest for at least the next ten days. I will help you with whatever you need while I am here, and Vir has offered to look in on you regularly as well. All you need to concentrate on is resting and getting well." She laid a hand on his back and steered him toward his bed as she spoke.
"But Delenn, I am supposed to be the one serving you." It was a feeble protest – he knew it was useless. He was still very weak, so there was little he could physically do, and they both knew it. But it felt so wrong.
"I know it feels strange to you," said Delenn kindly, helping him into bed and pulling the blankets up around him. "But you are my friend and you are ill and I am here to help. I want to help."
Lennier looked up at her from where he lay. He might have relinquished his romantic feelings for her at the river in his vision, but he could still not help but think how perfect she was in every way. Her heart was so bright and beautiful that it made everything around her, including himself, seem dim in comparison.
"I don't deserve you, Delenn," he whispered, lowering his eyes instinctively.
"No, no. None of that," she reprimanded gently, taking his chin into her hand and gently angling his head up so he had to look into her eyes. "You have the sweetest, most gentle soul of anyone I have ever met, Lennier. You are absolutely deserving of every single moment of care I have given you, and so much more. I wish you would see that."
"Forgive me," Lennier murmured, forcing himself to meet her eyes. "I am, as the humans would say, a creature of habit. I value our friendship more dearly than anything else in the universe, Delenn. But I am afraid it may take me some time to become accustomed to being, as you say, your equal. In temple, had I even thought such a thing…"
"I understand," said Delenn with a warm smile. "We are both products of a lifetime's exposure to a single system. But as fond as I am of my years of training, I am glad we have been able to see what more this grand universe has to offer, including each other." She pulled a chair from the table in the kitchen up next to the bed and sat in it. "Anyway, soon you will be well again, and then you can serve me to your heart's content. But for now, it is still my turn to look after you."
In a rather uncharacteristic display of impulsiveness, Lennier reached out and took Delenn's hand. "Thank you." He hoped his voice expressed just how much he meant those words.
Delenn squeezed his hand in return, and her smile told him that she understood perfectly.
"You are so very welcome, my dearest of friends." She sighed then. "At the very least, it keeps me from worrying about you so much if I am kept busy and in a place where I can keep an eye on you."
Lennier's heart sank at the thought that he was, by nature of his illness, still causing her pain. "But Delenn," he protested, trying to sound encouraging, "I am feeling much better. Doctor Franklin would not have let me out of Medlab if I wasn't."
"I know," she reassured him quickly. "And I am so pleased with your progress. But the thing that troubles me now is that we still do not know why you became so terribly ill. The doctor told me multiple times while he was trying to figure out a way to treat you that there must be some underlying problem that caused you to become so sick from something that does not even bother anyone else – something that stops your body from making those antibodies. And while Valen only knows how happy and relieved I am to have you healing, there is always a little piece of my mind that worries that I will have to see you go through this all again soon. I try to push such thoughts out of my head, because I cannot bear them. But sometimes they slip through."
She pulled her hand out of his and crossed her arms over her chest as though she were protecting herself. Lennier came so close to telling her what Doctor Franklin had told him several days ago, on his first day in the room in the general ward. But once again, he stopped himself. Delenn was already upset, and it was mere speculation at this point. There was no purpose in worrying her even further until he knew for sure.
So instead, Lennier did the only thing for her that he had been capable of recently – he tried to comfort her.
"Do not worry, Delenn. The doctor says that the antibody injections he has been giving me are working – the levels of the antibody in my blood are much higher than they were, and they are still improving. So I will be fine." He hoped he sounded more certain than he felt.
"With the strength you are showing, I believe my faith in you to be fully justified," said Delenn affectionately. "But I am afraid that before I intercepted you, you were on your way to the kitchen. Did you want some water?"
Lennier allowed himself just the smallest resigned sigh. If Delenn heard it, she did not acknowledge it.
"Yes, please."
