"The City Must Survive" from Frostpunk

CVII. Earth – Harbinger, Sin of Invidiousness

(Shepard)

Survive.

Survival at all costs in this storm.

Surviving the painful, unending reminders of what brought us here. What I had sacrificed to get here. The corpses, the blood, the love discarded. Everything set aside for this. Nothing completely forgotten, as it forever followed in my wake, even now, never leaving me. Old ideas I'd had before had fallen away in these winds. Those ideas of not needing anyone outside of myself to crash through these doors, the barriers in my way. I knew now how much I needed Liara with me. Without her, I couldn't have pushed past these barriers: slamming through them, door after door, wall after wall, ceiling after ceiling. Achieving and achieving. Climbing, clawing up this rough side of the mountain in the freezing snow.

In the midst of this struggling, I led my team to our first destination:

The San Diego International Airport, where those thousands of refugees had taken up shelter.

We endured this mix of traveling on foot through the storm, and riding Hammer team's Alliance trucks wherever we could. We took the trucks when it was safe—when we didn't have to worry about Reaper infantry getting in our way. When it wasn't safe, we would leave the trucks to punch a hole through the enemy lines. The light from Glyph and from Tali's tactical scans glowed through these wintry streets we passed through. This constant stop-and-go, in-and-out, made the cold somewhat more tolerable. Staying on the move, switching things up: we didn't have to focus on our cold or comfort for too long. But for every advantage we found, the storm found more ways to challenge us, trying to break us down.

That larger storm had reached the city. The one that had loomed some miles away up until now.

Blowing over us as a freezing cascade, the stronger blizzard nearly wiped us out.

Constant waves of snowy tundras gusted through the streets, stirring up a tornado of sleet and snow. This powerful whiteout, this cacophony of confusion could've ended us. Our visibility on the battlefield only extended out to maybe an arm's length. Only one exception. Tali's tactical scans glowed stronger through the storm, alerting us to dangers we otherwise would've missed. Those long-range ravager beams would've burst through the fog and decimated us if Legion and Garrus hadn't reacted sooner, sniping the ravagers before they could snipe us. Those husks could've easily flanked us, their mindless moaning muted in the strength of these winds, if Wrex and Jack hadn't noticed in time, keeping our flanks protected as I'd ordered. Hordes of brutes trudged through the streets, but our powerhouse biotics rained down enough artillery fire, taking those monsters out before they could charge at us.

Those banshees could've easily teleported into our group, grabbing us and murdering us on the spot.

We couldn't even hear their wailing in the distance. Not over the stubborn raging of these cold winds.

I spotted those unnatural silhouettes glowing through the fog, sniping them dead as an ashen dust.

Somewhere across the horizon, safely hidden in these winds, Harbinger awaited at the Alliance base. Surrounded by the storm, surrounded by the last of its forces, that Reaper ship dared me to come near.

I protected my team on this path to Coronado. I acted as this extra light through the storm. Ready to follow me anywhere, my team fought their hardest. Even as this storm kept trying to break us down. Yet I noticed some of our struggles. Garrus and Jack. They'd held on just fine before the storm's escalation. They could manage with their thermal armor, with Glyph sending my implant's warmth to the group. Now I noticed them slowing down. Now I noticed Jack's slower reaction times as she protected our flank. Now I noticed Garrus' sniper aim wavering in the winds. And once we made it back to the trucks, they shivered the most, needing more and more time to get back to a neutral state like everyone else.

This next truck ride took us directly to the airport. Right along the roads leading to the nearest terminal.

Jack sat next to me, her arms wrapped around herself. She bent over, shivering even worse than before. Garrus did the same from where he sat with Tali and Kaidan. No one else did, and it made me worry.

"Jack, Garrus," I addressed. "How are you two holding up?"

Jack tried to tell me, "I-I'm fine, Shepard. I'm good. Totally good." Her very breaths from inside her helmet sounded as if they'd frozen over. "C-Can we…take a break inside the airport? That'd be great."

Alarming me more, Garrus couldn't make himself speak. He did his best to nod in agreement. Acting like he had everything under control. But I knew better. I knew I needed to make a decision about this—fast.

Liara knew the same.

She looked to her drone at the center of the truck, asking, "Glyph, how cold is it outside right now?"

Glyph responded, "The current temperature is -45 degrees Celsius, or -50 degrees Fahrenheit. Weather experts predict temperatures will continue to drop to -73 degrees Celsius, or -100 degrees Fahrenheit."

This collective sense of disbelief passed over everyone inside the truck.

Dangerous levels of doubt crossed through Garrus' eyes, Jack's eyes. I understood what this meant.

As our vehicle brought us to friendly territory, I watched the screens monitoring outside activity. We passed by a number of Immortals, their elegant black and blue garb camouflaging them in the winds. They'd programmed the inner layers of their uniforms to keep them warm—as much as possible—without the need to wear bulky armor. Safe to move freely, they'd put in work with their artillery strikes at strategic locations, keeping this perimeter clear from any Reaper ground forces. Rannoch's silent guardians watched our trucks pass by in respect. Then they returned their focus to the cold distance.

As we left our trucks for the airport entrance, my team scrambled to help Jack and Garrus, shielding them from the storm as much as possible. Shielding them from the isolation of this snowy landscape: those cold, frozen echoes ringing out from the blizzard, the white winds. Pallid, colorless. Lifeless.

Getting my people inside the building's warmth only felt as a temporary relief.

Several thousand civilians had taken shelter here at the airport. These refugees had all been displaced by the war. Overcrowded with refugees in place, and with Alliance soldiers standing guard or on patrol. Even on a busy day for commuting, the airport had never reached this capacity. Loud with conversation. Necessary conversations to distract them from the ongoing struggle of this situation. Forced to sit and shelter in-place with nowhere else to go. Not until we dealt with Harbinger and ended this war.

No one recognized us right away. Probably for the best.

First priority: I brought Jack and Garrus with me to a rare open corner. Hidden here right by the terminal entrance, near a set of Alliance equipment for our comms. With no chairs to sit on, I guided them to sit on the floor, more and more concerned over their non-stop shivering. How they could barely even look at me. Tali and Liara stayed at either side of Garrus and Jack, offering as much support as they could. Kneeling in front of them, I brought out the supplies I'd packed away.

I found the thermal canteens I'd labeled with their names. Jack and Garrus drank the warmth as quickly as they could, showing an immediate improvement. I gave Tali and Liara these blankets for them, too. They wrapped the blankets around Garrus, around Jack, helping to warm them even more. But with the temperatures scheduled to plummet over the next few hours, I knew we couldn't sustain them. I had to make up my mind about whether or not to keep Jack and Garrus with us, or to evacuate them instead.

Not too far away, I noticed Kaidan with one of the Alliance higher-ups in charge of the airport.

Tali offered, "Go ahead and speak with the Alliance, Shepard. We'll keep an eye on Jack and Garrus."

"All right. Let me know if you need anything else."

As I passed by the rest of my team, they'd converged around Glyph's center, staying warm. Everyone nodded to me, looking ready and able for anything. I trusted they would be just fine.

Heading over to Kaidan, this other Alliance officer introduced himself.

"Commander Shepard," he said, saluting me. "The name's Major Coats. I'm responsible for keeping this airport safe. We were told to expect you. Glad you made it in one piece. The storm out there is brutal."

"Getting worse and worse by the minute. What's the situation, Major?"

"Just like with your neighborhood, the Alliance is holding the airport at all costs. This area has the single largest concentration of refugees in the entire city. We can't lose this area. Thankfully, the Immortals from Rannoch have been a tremendous help. With their assistance, we're confident we can keep holding on—as long as the power grid remains stable. If we lose power, these civilians will die."

"I understand. With so many people here, is there any danger of running out of food or supplies?"

"We've got it covered. All the restaurants in the food courts are a godsend. Managed to make use of the kitchens in there, keeping everyone fed as best we can. The thing is, we've pushed the place past its maximum capacity. We still have more refugees coming in by the hour. But we won't turn them away."

I looked to the picturesque picture windows, open to a full view of the storm. "What about these windows? The winds are getting stronger. You think the glass will hold? This is a structural weakness."

Major Coats admitted, "I'm afraid we don't have the resources to handle it. We've judged the risk to be relatively low. Anything we could use as a barricade, we're already using to fortify the area's perimeter."

I still didn't like the sound of that, but I wasn't in charge here.

"Then I'll take your word for it. My team will be here for a while longer to rest and recharge. You don't need us to help with the area's defense, do you?"

"No, Commander, leave that to us. You should focus on your team. If anything does come up, I'll be sure to contact you."

As Kaidan retreated with me back to the team, he shared my concerns.

"You were right, Commander," he said. "About the windows. These things can't be safe. They're lining pretty much every single wall in the whole airport. The winds are bound to break through at some point! And if that doesn't happen, what if the enemy breaks through instead? Hell, even if they just parked some vehicles or aircraft around the building, that's better than nothing. These civilians are vulnerable."

"I know, Kaidan. If the Alliance says the risk is low, we have to believe them. Not much else we can do."

All the more reason to reach that beam as quickly as we could.

"Okay, Shepard, if you're sure. What should we do about Garrus and Jack? They're looking a bit better now, but I'm still concerned. This storm isn't getting any warmer. I'm worried they might not make it."

"I hear you. Go ahead and stay with the rest of the team. I'll ask Liara and Tali what they think. While we're over there, I want you, Aria, and Miranda to keep the peace for our group. Stand by for now."

"Aye, aye, Commander!"

As I returned to Tali and Liara monitoring Jack and Garrus, I weighed our options.

We'd only arrived at the first stop on our journey through the storm. The first out of four before the bridge leading to Coronado. Garrus and Jack had both warmed up by now—mostly. Garrus could finally look me in the eye, trying to convey his willingness to carry on. Jack didn't want to abandon the mission; she didn't want to abandon me. But I looked to Tali and Liara, gauging how they felt. The muted worry there in their expressions, in their energies. Their judgments told me everything I needed to know.

So I decided: "Garrus, Jack. I'm calling the shuttle for an evacuation to the Normandy. You can't go on like this. I don't want to lose you. Not for anything."

Deeply disappointed, yet understanding, they accepted my judgment as well.

"Come in, Cortez. This is Shepard. We're at the airport. Can you reach us for an emergency evac? We need to get Jack and Garrus back to the ship."

"It'll be tricky, but I can make a quick pickup. Should I land at one of the gates for the civilian planes?"

"That'll work. We'll meet you there soon."

"Copy that!"

Liara and Tali joined me in escorting Jack and Garrus to the gate. I ordered the rest of the team to stay put. I wanted them to stay here in case the enemy happened to breach the terminal's entrance. As we went, I brought up my schematics of the airport. I'd been here plenty of times before. Enough to know my way around. Cortez marked his planned arrival gate on my map. Our group headed in that direction.

Walking through the airport to the boarding area, I held Jack close to me, keeping her insulated in this blanket. She kept on drinking from the canteen I gave her. Garrus did the same as Tali and Liara supported him. They'd both resigned themselves to this outcome, ultimately trusting in my decision.

Passing through security felt meaningless. I didn't see any of the usual TSA agents standing guard by these luggage conveyor belts and security scanners. Just a handful of Alliance soldiers on patrol, likely enjoying the welcome break from fighting outside in the snow.

In this larger area past security, we walked past scenes of even more refugees. They took shelter on the seats in the waiting area, or they lined in rows on the cold hard floor. People used backpacks and bundles of clothes as pillows. The refugees sitting around with designer name luggage did their best to stay away from those who'd had to pack their belongings in trash bags. As if they really had a choice. Somewhere in the vicinity, I heard the vague sounds of someone sobbing into their blanket. And compared to the terminal entrance, only a few conversations drifted through: of parents talking their kids through the wait, or neighbors sitting in groups, praying together, or commiserating about wanting to go home. Many people had a faraway look in their eyes, looking outward to a more hopeful future.

Everyone had left room for a narrow corridor of space. We took the path between these large groups, past this persistent smell of body odor everywhere. The lines to the public restrooms, and to the makeshift soup kitchens in the food court wrapped around the building. The overhead vid screens played broadcasts from the Alliance News Network nonstop. They had no entertainment. No escape.

If not for the overcrowding, maybe I could've fantasized about heading for a civilian flight somewhere. Maybe taking a vacation away from this storm. The sight of the snow out there did look beautiful—in a morbid way. It almost reminded me of Port Hanshan on Noveria. This view had once promised the perfect tourist delights that my hometown had in store. Not anymore.

Then I noticed Liara and Tali staring in one particular direction across the way.

Several volunteer caregivers—regular refugees sheltering from the storm—sat with groups of children. Children who'd lost their parents to the war or had just gotten separated. The groups had spread out throughout the food courts and shopping areas, there along the backdrop of the blizzard raging just outside the tall picture windows. The volunteers—adults of all ages and older teenagers—passed out a bunch of stuffed toys to the young children. Other volunteers worked in a makeshift call center, trying to contact and locate the parents whose children had found their way to the airport. More volunteers talked with the kids through their trauma and pain, reassuring them that everything would be all right.

I heard their genuine promises: "Commander Shepard and her team will save us."

I didn't hear any of the kids crying. They looked distressed, clinging to their stuffed toys for safety. But having these dedicated volunteers and Alliance personnel protecting them made all the difference.

At the designated gate, Cortez already had the shuttle waiting for us. We had to say goodbye…for now.

Garrus told me, "Sorry, Commander… I really hoped we could make it all the way."

"It's not your fault," I insisted. "This storm isn't letting up any time soon. I'd rather have you alive."

Jack pleaded with me, "Just promise you'll make it back soon. You have to."

"We will, Jack. As soon as we can. Now get back to the Normandy."

They boarded the shuttle, taking off for the skies and to the ship. Dr. Chakwas would take care of them.

Walking back to the team, I held Liara's hand, Tali's hand, the two of them at either side of me.

With two of our people gone, our remaining numbers had a heavier burden to shoulder. Liara, Tali, Kaidan, Wrex, EDI, Legion, Miranda, Aria, Samara. One of our snipers down; one of our biotics down. Yet if we had lost Garrus and Jack to the frost, I could only imagine what would've happened to our morale.

Then I noticed something going on outside.

The winds picked up to dangerous speeds out there. The strength of the snow and the winds both battered against the glass. Barely, just barely, I spotted the tiniest cracks forming in the window. No sounds yet. Nothing to alert the hundreds of refugees in the immediate area. Tali and Liara didn't notice, missing Jack and Garrus. But once everyone else noticed, this place would suffer a large-scale panic.

I could have, should have shouted out to warn everyone. To give them some time to run to safety.

Or I could've ignored that, prioritizing Liara and Tali's safety instead.

I had such a horrible flashback to the first day of the Reaper invasion. Leaving my apartment; rushing to the monorail station with Aria. That crush of people rushing through the dark of the station. How they'd trampled over that police officer trying to maintain order. How they did the same to so many others.

Innocent as they were, these refugees would very likely do the same. They would in their panic to get away from the windows, away from the freezing cold. They wouldn't care that Commander Shepard and some of my team were in the crowd with them. We would end up lost and piled over in the panic-crush.

Senses heightening, I noticed a vent higher up on a wall. There down the hallway next to the restrooms, the hall itself leading to a number of stairs and escalators. A rare empty hall where no one would notice:

I made this split-second decision, right as those cracks in the windows lengthened as fissures.

This decision to protect my family over these hundreds of helpless refugees.

I activated my tactical cloak. Tali and Liara disappeared to invisibility with me. Disoriented and confused, it took them a moment to follow along with me. They knew I'd picked up on some kind of danger. They trusted me. They both went with my motions as I hurried us down the hall, heading toward that vent. Tall enough to reach, I used my omni-tool to make the opening. All as these people heard the louder cracking from the windows, undeniable now. Initial screams, initial panicking. We couldn't stop it.

Liara and Tali flinched away from those sounds. The screaming terror resounding through the airport. I got this vent open. I helped Tali get in first, lifting her up to the opening. Then I did the same with my wife, making sure she safely crawled through after Tali. Too much of an enclosed space for Liara to turn around and help me. I climbed up the vent on my own. Tali and Liara waited for me, calling out for me to hurry. I got inside just as the window shattered, rushing a deadly current of cold air inside the building.

Up ahead, Tali cried out over the screams, "Shepard, are you in now? How did you notice that in time?!"

"I'm in, Tali. I was concerned about the windows when first we got here. Must've been hyper-aware."

Liara praised me, "Thank the goddess for your awareness. Should we seal the vent after us…?"

"I'll handle it."

I maneuvered my omni-tool arm around to seal off the vent behind me. I did this as Liara and Tali kept shuddering in fright, reacting to those haunting echoes through our metallic surroundings. The loudened sounds practically rattled against us from the metal. Thankfully not from someone who'd noticed our escape, trying to crawl into the vent after us. I felt horrible…but I couldn't risk that kind of crowding.

Miranda contacted us via radio: "Shepard, we heard what happened with the windows! Are you hurt?! Did you manage to evacuate Jack and Garrus? Are Tali and Liara still with you? Please respond ASAP!"

"We're okay, Miranda. Cortez left with Garrus and Jack a few minutes ago. After we left the boarding area, I noticed the windows breaking before anyone else. I escaped into a vent with Liara and Tali."

"Thank God you're all right! The rest of us are still waiting at the entrance to the terminal. Major Coats is ordering the Alliance to handle the madness that's ensued in the affected area. There's no telling if they'll be able to seal the windows. People are already dead from trampling each other in the chaos."

"Damnit, they should've barricaded the windows a long time ago. This was a complete logistical failure!"

"I agree with you, Commander. I noticed the same issue when we arrived at the airport. That area suffered the worst because it's currently facing the brunt of the storm. The winds are barreling straight in that direction. The Alliance's careless mistakes nearly compromised us. We could have lost you…"

I urged her, "Don't focus on that, Miranda. The Alliance needs to deal with it. This is on them. I promise we'll be back with the team soon enough—once we get through these vents. Shouldn't take long."

"Understood. Kaidan and Aria will help me keep the team together. We'll see you soon."

Liara couldn't turn around. But she still extended the armor of her gloved hand out to me—behind her—needing my touch. Tali had done the same for her at the front of our line. I held my wife's hand in a quiet reassurance. And I felt her gratitude, bittersweet and all. How I'd had to make that instinctive choice to protect us. Even if it meant letting so many others suffer. I couldn't regret my decision.

I gently guided Tali forward, giving her directions as she led us at the front. Using the airport's building schematics, we took advantage of the vents to get where we needed to go. Tali and Liara both would stop to flinch every now and then, again horrified by the sounds coming from all around us. We couldn't escape the agony. I remembered my patience, making sure they remembered our focus for the mission.

Once we reunited with the team, we called for Hammer to pick us up again. The panic had rattled the refugees in this area of the terminal, yet the Alliance somehow maintained order. Only because they just now started barricading these windows nearby, well after the fact. I didn't have the stomach to yell or admonish anyone. I cared more about keeping my people alive and making sure we stayed on track.

Cortez soon reported back to the Normandy with Garrus and Jack. They'd made it there safe and sound.

Leaving in these trucks, we left behind the tragic plight of the refugees. We reaffirmed our next plans, our next destination: the marinas and restaurants along the harbor. Grand Vizier Razfahd and the Imperial Army held on in that location, fending back the enemy as much as they could before we arrived. So we took these trucks as far as we could, getting the hell away from that blighted airport.


My hometown's urban harbors, sitting just by the tall city center, had mostly frozen over. The once-idyllic marinas and restaurants had populated the area, gazing out to the sea: those endless horizons extending outward, opposite the crowded bustle of the city's skyscrapers. Multiple boats, yachts, and old military ships had docked along the waterfront, adding to the beauty of these surroundings. The water itself had ever reflected the colors and imagination of the sky: pale mornings and heady twilights.

But now the storm and the war had blasted and destroyed most of this area.

The boats and ships sat frozen in place in the icy waters. Just past them, though, the Alliance had carved these maritime express lanes through the ice, allowing for our naval ships to cross through the city.

And these Reaper ground forces had swarmed the harbors, ruining my memories of this place.

We found Grand Vizier Razfahd's quarian and geth forces fighting back against the enemy. A wall of technological force against those Reaperized monstrosities. Non-stop rocket strikes from the ex-Flotilla marines; a barrage of heavy weaponry from the geth and geth primes; and unending bombardments from the quarians' geth spitfire assault fire. The Imperial Army held the line against these infantry, but they couldn't quite push back against them, either. A powerful stalemate had whittled down both sides.

As my team reinforced Rannoch's army, we heard Kal'Reegar's rallying cry:

"Here comes the cavalry! It's Shepard and her team!"

Fighting alongside his troops, Razfahd shouted over the snow, "Commander Shepard, you're just in time! We need your help to punch through this wall! The Reapers have dug in!"

With such a long frontline, we had to avoid the temptation to spread out.

Better to stick together for a focused, coordinated push.

Seeing an opening, I ordered, "My team, stay clustered around me! We need to punch through as a spearhead! Grand Vizier, make sure your troops reinforce behind us! We'll keep encircling the enemy!"

"Brilliant, Commander! My people nearest to you are prepared to follow behind!"

"Kaidan, Miranda, Aria, Wrex—clear an opening for us! Push as hard as you can!"

Absolute strength from our strongest, most stubborn frontliners. As a group, they punched through the Reapers' line. They charged through this wall of cannibals, husks, brutes, and marauders in our way. They pushed against the snowy tundra pushing us back equally as hard. Constant slews of sleet hammering down on us, the winds pushing and ramming against us. Yet my people had found this will to defy nature, to defy the forces around us. We forced this path through the crowd of enemies, circling around and around, bending all the way around, with the Imperial Army reinforcing right behind us.

As we trapped the enemy in our encirclements, Razfahd's forces joined with mine. We obliterated the enemy as we cut them off from their allies; as we cut off reinforcements; as we stopped them from fleeing. We did this over and over again. Again and again my most powerful biotics coordinated on tactical explosions, ripping the enemy apart. Again and again our strongest techs coordinated on cryo explosions, freezing the enemy to death as sadistic payback for the storm. Again and again we circled around, encircling in these strategic spots, cutting the enemy off one cluster at a time. We destroyed the enemy section by section, group by group, casting them off to the frozen waters along the harbor.

The Alliance rushed in to support us from the seas.

Several massive battleships arrived, sailing through the maritime lanes across the ice. Targeted shore bombardments: the ships fired at the enemy along the harbor, clearing out scores of infantry at once. We took advantage of the opportunity. We bulldozed more spearheads, forcing the Reapers toward the shoreline. There in that forcing, they faced down the threat of these constant bombardments from our ships. Our strategic zoning of the enemy left them with no choice but to die to our superior naval might.

All as the temperature continued to drop.

Glyph continued on as our group's center alongside me, acting as this portable heater for us.

My team, and the Imperial Army, fought on with no regard for the cold anymore. In this flow state, everyone had again turned into a hivemind. Everyone pushed on with no regard for their own well-being, for their own individual self. My team stuck to me, followed me. Wherever I walked, wherever I led them, they created this magic as seamless spearheads. The head of a thrown weapon barreling non-stop through this crowded wall of enemies—pushing and pushing and pushing, spearing them to death.

As Razfahd's army shored up our six, and the Alliance naval ships protected our seaside flank, I watched the skies.

Ominous spreads of dilapidated wings flapped through the air.

With this limited visibility, and the freeze fogging my helmet's slot of sight, I couldn't see everything. I assumed those things had to be harvesters. And as I fired my sniper rifle, I found that I'd assumed right. The airborne harvesters exploded as they died. Those explosions acted as flashbang grenades of light across the sky, temporarily improving our visibility through the thick fog. That light helped me see more:

Those harvesters had brought more danger with them.

Actual Reaper ships had come to reinforce this area. Reaper capital ships, destroyers. With us out in the open by the harbor, this left us exposed on the ground. My team didn't notice. Razfahd didn't, either.

I gave the order, "Liara, Aria, Samara—we have Reaper ships inbound! Protect us with a biotic field!"

That loud, obnoxious brass blaring from the Reaper ships startled my team to decisive action.

Strengthening each other in unison, our trifecta of asari powerhouses got this done.

They raised a biotic field over our whole team, over the grand vizier's entire battalion. A show of true force wrapped around our space as an airtight field, a translucent biotic blue protecting us all. The Imperial Army stopped in place, gazing up in wonder at the marvel of this biotic defense. Aria, Liara, and Samara held on against this Reaper dreadnought fire. They held on against those dangerous crimson beams lasering through the frost. They held on as I called the Alliance for backup, knowing our naval ships couldn't survive for long. I watched as the Reapers decimated those ships, explosions blasting through the icy seas. We could only protect the ones around us, fighting on the ground. This biotic field sheltered us.

As we waited for aerial backup, I did what I could to help us hold on.

I stood right behind Liara in this center of the group. My presence emboldened her, helping Liara push as hard as we needed her to. To my right, I grabbed hold of Aria's shoulder in support. To my left, I did the same for Samara. All three of them powered up with my touch, my undeniable belief in their strength. They held the hell on, protecting everyone on the ground. Our team and our allied forces pushed back against the enemy, just as our requested cavalry arrived.

Leviathan appeared there in the skies. With its superior gifts, it disabled the Reaper ships one after another. Those gargantuan menaces fell out of the sky, landing somewhere in the city, crashing into those skyscrapers as their new coffins. This show of force from Leviathan discouraged any more of those ships from coming over. As we wiped out the Reaper infantry, we guaranteed the security of this area.

Even with our decisive victory, no one wanted to celebrate out in this freezing storm.

We hurried inside one of the few restaurants still standing along the harbor. The Top of the Market, where I'd taken Miranda for dinner last year. Last year on Valentine's Day for our first date. I felt those memories passing through me as we passed through the rickety entrance. Fond memories of yesteryear.

My team and Razfahd's battalion of geth and quarians packed inside the darkened restaurant. Only the light from the once-scenic windows helped us see anything. That not-so-idyllic view from the harbor had frozen over. Reaper infantry corpses piled along the black ice of the shore. Piles of bloodied masses of guts from shredded cannibals, husks, marauders—those deaths soaked into the ice, coloring everything as crimson. Such a morbid painting of the aftermath of our battle. But we'd cleared the entire shoreline from my apartment to here. We'd made it halfway to the Coronado Bridge. Two more stops left.

Exhausted from the fight, Samara, Liara, and Aria sat down on the floor right by the entrance. I rummaged through my packed supplies, finding just what they needed. I handed them their canteens filled with warm fruit juice. They needed the extra sugar intake to replenish their energy. Drinking fruit juice this warm wouldn't have been anyone's first choice. But the three of them seemed to appreciate my foresight. They each drank from their canteens, catching their breaths and collecting themselves.

The rest of our people sat down at the many tables spread throughout the building. This place had been so used to fine seafood dining along the waterfront. Now the white of these tablecloths had dirtied with decay and disuse. I couldn't imagine any food or alcohol left in the kitchen. Probably all looted by now.

Kal'Reegar had joined Tali, EDI, and Kaidan at one of the tables close by.

"I heard what happened at the airport," he said, dimmed with remorse. "Sad to hear about those refugees who lost their lives. Just glad you and your team made it out of there."

"Thanks, Reegar," replied Tali. "Shepard's quick thinking saved us. We wouldn't be here without her."

Kaidan added, "The Alliance really messed up back there. Hopefully they have the situation under control now."

Reegar agreed, "Yeah, can't imagine what'd happen if your civilians lost faith in the military. I heard you had to send two of your people back to the Normandy. You're missing a couple of familiar faces."

"That is correct," confirmed EDI. "Garrus and Jack could not withstand these lower temperatures. I have noticed their absence, as we would have won the previous battle more quickly with their participation."

A little ways away, I noticed Legion chatting with the army's geth forces, possibly exchanging tips and battle stories.

Miranda's nostalgia had gotten the better of her. She went to sit at that table. The exact table where she and I had sat during our date. Seemingly ruining the moment, though, Wrex went to sit across from her.

"Wrex…? What are you doing here? Can I help you?"

Wrex asked her with a grin, "Think you'd ever have one of those fancy dinners with me?"

Too stunned to react, Miranda didn't know what to say.

"Hey, play along with me. Don't you know how strong you are, Miranda? You're one hell of a woman."

Now Miranda scoffed in amusement, trying not to laugh. "Playing along, are we? I'm afraid you've come up short, Wrex. You'll have to work much harder than that if you want to get me on a date."

"Is that so, huh? And here I thought my sexy battle scars would be enough to charm you."

How bizarre.

I turned my attention back to Liara, Samara, and Aria.

"How are you feeling now? You okay to keep going?"

"I think so," answered Liara. "The juice helped a great deal. I'm happy you remembered our small tradition. This goes all the way back to Therum when we first met. You surprised me back then."

"It's a 'small tradition' that's kept you and our other biotics going. You should expect this from me."

Samara noted, "Shepard, you are underestimating the strength of your gesture. It is remarkable that a non-biotic would even remember such a thing. It is particularly meaningful for you to do this for us."

Aria pointed out, "You've always been a thoughtful leader. Little things like this add up over time. You could say it's inspiring."

"I'm just glad you're all okay. We survived the fight. We don't need to evacuate anyone else. We can keep going once our team's ready to head out."

Grand Vizier Razfahd found me in gratitude. "We can't thank you enough, Commander. The Imperial Army is prepared to keep fighting. Once you depart, my troops and I will keep holding this area."

"Good. The Reapers are bound to send in reinforcements eventually. Though I doubt they'll send as many as they did before. Maybe enough to maintain a presence here, but no more than that."

"Agreed. It's clear we've shattered their morale with our victory. They'll want revenge, but they won't be foolish enough to send too many units over. My forces will hold back any reinforcements; keep them from following after your group as you proceed to the next area. Where are you headed now?"

"We're off to a red light district to meet with the salarians. Padok Wiks and his troops made it there ahead of time. We'll need to help them fend off the enemy just as we've helped you."

"Understood, Commander. You have my word that our imperial forces will hold on until the end. We have no choice but to survive this conflict. Best of luck to you and your team. Rannoch stands with you."


Approaching this red light district, we couldn't recognize it from the buildings around. We only spotted recognized the once-busy brothel on this side of the street. The rest of this place had corroded from the war, much like everywhere else in the city. Yet we heard the signs we'd made it to the right place:

Booming bass blasted from the 94's interior, dulled and diluted outside the building, but still quite loud.

That experimental, industrial ever blasting with the old promise of a good time inside those doors.

Against all odds, the 94 remained open and running in the middle of a war.

Aria could hardly believe it. "Is that music from the club? Looks like they really are still operational."

"Sure sounds like they are," said Wrex. "A real sign of resistance against the enemy. Gotta respect it."

Looking around, I'd expected us to run into the salarian battalion by now. We couldn't hear anything except for the music. No fighting, no other signs of resistance. Unless…

An urgent whisper called out, "Commander Shepard, over here! It's Padok Wiks. We're taking cover!"

I crouched down with my team, heading toward Padok Wiks and his troops. They'd taken cover behind a pile of abandoned skycars. The salarians gripped their weapons close to their chestplates, heaving for breath from inside their helmets. The natural frontward bends of their anatomy had bent more, and more as they doubled over, unable to look up anywhere. Each and every breath they let out sounded shallow, shaking. Something had rattled Wiks and his people. Something had nearly overwhelmed them.

Salarians in general weren't the best at a straight-up fight, as I remembered all too well from Virmire.

But even this seemed more treacherous than that fated operation.

Reaching Wiks' side, I asked him, "What's going on? Why are your people so spooked?"

Before he could answer me, the salarians perked up from Glyph's presence. They felt the heat it had brought over from my temperature implants. This unexpected warmth had warmed their spirits anew.

"What a miracle!" praised Wiks. "This drone is invaluable, Commander. My people are struggling in the cold. It wasn't helping us deal with our other situation. There's an issue on the battlefield."

"Right, what's the issue? What's the situation?"

He pointed to the nearest salarian corpses. "We've lost a number of soldiers to the enemy. Specifically the ravagers. Those rachni-snipers. They're posted across the area, usually in unexpected locations. The ravagers are shooting anything that moves. There's no way to get a foothold. The storm is also affecting our visibility. We're unable to pinpoint where the ravagers are. I'm afraid this place is a death trap."

"We can take care of that."

"Really? How?"

Without any prompting from me, Tali activated her tactical scan again. Several of those ravager-shaped, omni-tool orange outlines glared through the fog. Padok Wiks and his people marveled over Tali's tech, while also scorning the sight out there, confirming their worst fears. The sheer number of those rachni-things would've overwhelmed just about anyone. Their long-range fire packed a punch. And not being able to see the damned things to fire back—I understood the salarians' struggle. They'd gotten sniped at over and over, seemingly out of nowhere, leaving them with no choice but to wait for my team's arrival.

For science, I bundled up some snow in my hands, packing together a decent enough snowball.

As soon as I threw the snowball across the street, the ravagers sniped it down.

My science experiment detonated from the force of those attacks. Long-range volleys of red lasers fired over and over, obliterating my poor snowball. Those lasers angled from all kinds of vantage points. The ravagers had to be on rooftops as well as the ground level. The ground beneath us rocked a bit from the weight of the brutes passing by. They also went over to where my snowball landed, deciding to investigate. Deranged moaning sounded from a bunch of husks, too. No piercing wails from any banshees, at least.

I scoured the area for a safe vantage point—away from the ravagers' locations.

My search landed at another familiar place. The taco shop I'd taken Liara to on our shore leave, when we'd met James there before the suicide mission. The mixed-zone building had a few residences upstairs. Presumably the taco shop's owners had lived there before. The place looked empty now.

"If the ravagers want to play this game, we can play it, too. Wiks, do you have any snipers with you?"

"Yes, Commander," he replied, beckoning over his experts. "If you have any ideas to overcome the rachni, my troops are yours."

"I'll bring your snipers with me to a vantage point. Legion, you're coming with us, too. Once we deal with enough of the ravagers, my team and your other troops can handle the rest of the enemies."

"Understood! We will stand by until the field is clear."

"All right, let's move!"

Legion readied its Widow. "With Shepard-Commander! Setting ranged targeting priorities!"

As I left, I made sure to hold Liara's hand for the briefest of moments. Squeezing a bit in affection. My unspoken promise to be back soon. Liara's touch, even separated by the armor of our gloves, thawed the stubborn cold from my hand. She treasured this moment while she could, watching me head out.

The salarian snipers followed Legion and me to the Mexican restaurant.

Much like the Top of the Market, this taco shop looked unrecognizable.

Running on adrenaline, I led Legion and our salarian allies upstairs.

Up these broken, splintered stairs: paths uneven, foundations unreliable. Yet still we reached a suitable vantage point. With Tali's tech as our guide, we aimed our sniper rifles outside the windows—without physically protruding our weapons outside, to keep the Reapers from spotting us too easily. Constant sniping in unison or not, we dealt with these ravagers, shooting them from unusual and unexpected locations. On rooftops, in strange corners, inside dilapidated buildings. Those flesh-colored sacs popped in a revolting satisfaction, one after another.

We gave our teams the cover they needed to deal with the enemies on the ground.

But as our people cleared the streets, I felt more of my limitations. This freeze had gotten worse. Worse and worse as the minutes passed. My trigger hand started to slow, held back by these limitations of mine. That even with my implants, this frost had started slowing me down. I looked to Legion next to me, how it kept shooting, unimpeded by the frost around us. I took that as my needed inspiration, forcing myself to keep aiming correctly, to keep sniping in precision.

My slowed reaction times also hampered what else I could notice.

There in the streets, Wrex had decided to play the hero. He took on several waves of cannibals and husks on his own. A mighty krogan headbutting and smacking away the meager enemies around him, sure. Yet some of his choices looked downright reckless. Another well-hidden ravager had almost sniped him down—until one of our salarian snipers dealt with the threat in time. Wrex didn't notice a thing. He just kept on going. He kept up his rampage, seemingly in a battle trance as he killed and killed and killed.

Wrex even stole some of Aria's kills, forcing her to notice what else he had done.

Aria's frosted rage reverberated down the street and back. "Damnit, Wrex, what the hell are you doing?! I can handle these things myself! Who asked you to go on an all-out rampage?"

Wrex laughed as he tore another cannibal apart. "It's all part of the sport, Aria. I'm a krogan! Besides, maybe the music's got me all excited. Anything that helps me fight through this cold is a good thing."

EDI advised him, "So long as you do not over-extend yourself, Wrex, we will continue to support you."

"Okay, okay. I get the picture, EDI. I'll keep my head on."

Soon after, Liara called out her report to me, "Commander, it appears we have cleared the area now! It should be safe for us to retreat inside the 94."

Padok Wiks confirmed, "Yes, all clear on this end as well! You and our snipers did a fine job. Thank you for your timely assistance!"

I couldn't imagine the Reapers just leaving the club alone.

But as we approached the well-guarded, well-barricaded entrance, it turned out to be true. The Reapers really had left the club alone. Or at some point, they'd tried and failed to storm this fortified entrance. And when that did fail, they'd turned to stalking the streets for anyone else trying to get in the doors.

Keeping this music playing really did seem like yet another act of resistance and defiance.

Making ourselves known as friendlies, the club's security let down the fortress for us to enter safely.

That same bouncer stayed posted at the door—armed this time—letting us in. "Good to see you again, Commander Shepard. Appreciate you and your people taking out those Reapers. You all can come in."

"Thanks. I'm surprised you're still at it. How's the 94 still up and running?"

As my team and the salarians passed through, he explained, "We had a bunch of refugees seek shelter once the invasion started. Some of them were off-duty Alliance soldiers who couldn't get in contact with their commanding officers. While waiting for orders, they decided to fortify this place. The club's owners brought in as many refugees as we could. Managed to keep our supply chain going, too. It's safe here."

Aria mentioned, "I have to say, I admire your dedication."

"High praise from Afterlife's owner. Stay as long as you'd like. Drinks are on the house."

The music that had blasted outside now came into focus, materializing all around us. The warmth from the building wrapped around us, too, thawing the frost from our armor. Utterly relieved to take a break again, my people and the salarians took seats on the couches and booths throughout the main floor. Some of them went upstairs to do the same. A lot of refugees remained here as well, though not nearly as many as the airport. Everyone looked glad to see us, anyway, enjoying their warm drinks all the same.

Glyph remained our strongest heating system, staying put in a central location on the main floor.

Liara made the rounds, making sure everyone on our team had one of those drinks—non-alcoholic for the mission. She checked on everyone in general, too, taking stock in my stead. She knew I needed a break, yet Liara also knew not to make a big deal out of it. I didn't want anyone to see that I needed to take this seat at the bar downstairs. That I definitely needed this warm drink of my own, boiling over my internal freeze. After that battle outside, I almost couldn't feel my hands anymore. Way too cold.

This dense urban area had protected us from the forceful winds, but we could never escape the frost.

Tali took the seat next to me, feeling my pain without a word.

"How are you doing, Shepard? Are you in any pain?"

"Not exactly," I said, noting my pain meds hadn't worn off yet. "I've been running on adrenaline and survival instincts this whole time. No idea how sustainable that is."

"It isn't sustainable at all. You should at least drink something to warm you up."

I had a hard time even wrapping my hand around this heated bottle. The drink I'd ordered from the bar.

Tali helped me out. She helped me remove the armor of my gloves. Only the stretch-fabric of my under armor stayed over my hands. Taking my hands in hers, Tali rubbed her gloved palms over my fingers, my knuckles, down to my wrists. Friction acting as the magic heater I needed. Direct contact, direct touch. Enough to wake up my sense of touch, restoring the motor movements in my hands. I could function again.

"Thanks, Tali. You've helped us a lot on this mission. Your support's invaluable."

"That's what I'm here for, Shepard. I'm always glad to assist."

Gently she watched as I drank my drink, warming and heating. The next magic of this liquid heat extending outward from my core. The same liquid heat undulating—digitally—over the dark walls as cool decorations. How the gold morphed and moved with the waves of the music's beats. Just another part of the atmosphere of this place I'd always loved. I'd loved getting to share this nightclub with the team: bringing them here for shore leave before. And now taking shelter from the storm raging outside.

The magic of Liara's touch found me, too, as she found us at the bar.

She let us know, "Everyone seems to be doing fine. I also spoke with Wrex about his reckless fighting. Apparently this really is the best way for him to deal with the cold. Krogan don't do well in the snow, either. But he is managing in the only way he knows how."

"Cost of doing business, then," I reasoned. "I'll keep an eye on him."

"What about you, Shepard? Are you all right? I get the feeling this journey is starting to take its toll."

"It's starting to, yes. We only have one last stop to make before the bridge. I'll make it."

Liara willed herself to believe me. "Okay. I will check on you again once we reach our next stop."

Tali asked in dread, "Isn't it that hotel? The US Grant. The same one we stayed in before…"

The requiem's origin point.

Liara remembered all too well. But she wouldn't let that deter her from what we needed to do.

"Let's not worry about that, Tali. I will be fine. Are we due to meet with General Victus this time?"

"Yes," I confirmed. "He has the turians and the krogan under his command. I'm sure Victus will want to help us strategize for the final push. We could use his input."

As Liara sat with us, taking a moment to drink and warm up, I wondered how else to spend this time.

I considered going up to my perch on the roof. But the storm and the enemy had probably damaged the area by now. Besides, I had too many memories up there. Memories I didn't want to revisit any time soon. Memories that only would've distracted me—as they tried to do now, just from me thinking about them again. I couldn't help seeing her face, her smile. Hearing these echoes of her words, her laughter.

Again and again, I wanted to believe those days were a mistake.

That I had made some error of judgment with my choices back then.

That I would somehow be better off if I had taken some other path instead.

Yet in a morbid way, those experiences and those mistakes had brought me here. Right here to this point, this juncture, this precipice. My talks with Sha'ira on the Citadel had helped me accept this idea. To this day, I had some difficulty believing it fully. That the wrong paths somehow led to the correct one.

Easing me from my thoughts, Padok Wiks came to find us.

"Commander Shepard, thank you again for your assistance. I understand you're now waiting on Hammer team's vehicles for transportation. Are you headed farther into the city?"

"Closer to the bridge leading to Coronado. Harbinger's waiting for us."

"Then my troops and I will remain here. This nightclub is a valuable location for your citizens. For the sake of humanity's morale, we would be better off holding this area. So long as we can prevent the Reapers from gaining another foothold, we won't have any repeats from before."

"We'll leave it to you. I think it's time for my team to head out. Hammer should be here soon."

"Of course, Commander," replied Wiks. "I have every faith you will succeed. My people are with you."


This struggle.

This descent into physical madness.

Continuing this journey through the snow—stop-and-go with the trucks, stop-and-go on foot again—I felt myself breaking down. I felt myself breaking my limitations. And I should have stopped long ago. Given up and accepted this limit, this wall. Yet I kept moving forward. I kept leading my team ahead, knowing they still had the strength and stamina to keep going. I shattered the walls in front of me. The walls of my limitations, one after the other. In still going, in still fighting, I created a limitless expanse. Peerless.

Even as I felt my breaths heaving. Breathing harder, grunting harder within the confines—or within the safety of my helmet. Confines, maybe, as I felt my mind close to tearing apart, just from pushing myself this much. Pushing as I walked through the frost. Walking against the wind. Walking forward, refusing to give up, even though I should've fallen a long time ago. I should've given up right then and there, feeling the frost cutting through my armor. Digging into my skin, my flesh and bones, forcing out every scrap of exhaustion from my body. This added weight didn't help: of our emergency supplies over my back, and the love of my Black Widow I gripped in my frigid hands. Oddly enough, focusing on the weight and this grip helped to distract me. Something else to focus on. A powerful distraction from the frozen elements.

These distractions could only distract me for so long.

Our team soon met up with General Victus and his troops, yet I barely realized it. I couldn't hear the sound of the general's voice as he spoke to us. I couldn't hear anything—not even the winds—over this constant ringing in my ears. A sudden light-headedness. Too close to collapsing, fainting on the spot.

Blinking hard, I thought I saw a dense gathering of orange outlines in the distance. Tali's tactical scan had revealed something coming toward us. An enemy ambush…?

Miranda's frantic order sheared through my senses: "Shepard, get down! Stay behind me!"

Kneeling down to the snowy ground, hard, I felt these danger levels rising. I needed to stop. I needed to take a breath. I needed to get us to that hotel just within reach.

I heard the powerful crash of Miranda's omni-shield against the ground. She knelt there in a strong defensive position, shielding me from the bullet hell. Victus synergized his troops with mine, our frontliners charging ahead with his, running headlong into the assault. In the midst of this combat storm, I felt Liara's touch. How she held me close, knowing I couldn't go on like this. Not as I felt this creeping pain through my limbs, searing, close to setting my arms, my back, and my legs on fire. The sheer agony.

My pain meds had worn off, and I was—ironically—in too much pain to take them again.

"Shepard, can you hear me?! Please say something! Anything!"

I grabbed hold of Liara's grip around me, unable to speak. I couldn't say a word.

I could only wait for our people to deal with this ambush. It didn't take long for them to push the enemy back. Miranda protected me the whole time, shielding me. Liara did the same as she kept me in her hold. Now I actually had to stand up. Now I actually had to walk to the hotel. If I didn't, my team would notice the problem. They'd lose focus, lose morale. I couldn't let that happen. I forced myself to move.

Heading to the hotel, I pushed up against this next edge. The edge of yet another of my limitations. Just in pushing forward through this snow. Lifting my boots over the piles of bloodied snow at my feet. Leading my team forward, acting as this central sun for the group alongside Glyph. My team followed me with General Victus and his troops. I knew my team would follow me to the ends of the universe and back. Even as I raged against this edge of reason, trying not to fall clear over the cliff, down to my death.

Liara supported me well away from that death. She still remembered that pain from this place. She pushed past her terrible memories of this hotel, focused on me more than anything else.

I was so worried about Wrex's recklessness earlier when I should've been more worried about myself.

Inside the broken glass doors, Victus ordered the turians and krogan: "Secure the area!"

"Sir!"

Everything else felt as a blur.

The general movement toward the first-floor common room.

My team's idea to light a few bonfires, using the fallen wooden beams as fodder for the flames.

Bypassing the common room, Liara brought me inside one of the hotel rooms. Filled with collapsed wreckage, the windows had at least held on, even if the door hadn't. We had to settle for this lack of privacy, as the rest of the rooms on this floor didn't look much better off. Liara helped me sit down on the bed first. Even as I felt this urge to care for the team. The supplies I had brought for everyone…

Liara knew. "I will hand out the supplies to everyone soon. Don't worry. Let me take care of you first."

She eased my helmet from me, opening to these fuller breaths. Then Liara eased me back against the headboard. Enough for me to sit up as she helped me drink this warmth. The warmth I had packed away in the thermal canteen for myself. The drinks we'd had at the 94 did help, but this one felt as a godsend at a time like this. More so as my wife helped me take these pain meds, refreshing. Even as she hesitated over the sheer dosage I needed. Anything less wouldn't have worked. We both knew it.

"You need to rest," she said, helping me lie down. "Close your eyes. Get a bit of sleep while you still can. I'll make sure the others have what they need. Then I will be right back by your side. I promise."

As she kissed me, encouraging me to sleep, I heard the other reassurances. The nearby sounds of conversation drifting through the door. That conversation from just around the corner. Victus and his troops had secured the building. Our people had cleared the area. I could afford to get some sleep…

"I need you to believe in me. I need your true unwavering belief in me. Please don't give up on me."

"All right, Shepard… Well-played. Very well-played. You win."

.

"You did good, child. You did good. I'm proud of you. Keep going. Keep fighting. Don't you dare give up now."

.

"You can't see this from my eyes. I've watched the news, how they praise you. Like you're everyone's savior. Except they have no idea what goes on behind-the-scenes. No one else sees how this has been affecting you. This will only get worse over time. Because even if we do finish this mission, there will be more. The asari councilor said our team will be immortal once you take down Harbinger. We'll always have the next thing to face down. The next overwhelming challenge, the next galaxy-ending threat. For the rest of eternity. I can't stand the thought of putting you through this forever. I can't do that to you."

.

"You shouldn't have to suffer like this, Shepard… I refuse to let this go on forever. Not for them."

.

"Even if it is a burden, it is yours to carry with me. Just as mine are for you. I want us to work together on this. I spent years suffering under my own burdens alone. I feel better these days because of you. Because you helped me take this weight from my shoulders. Now I'm here to do the same for you."

.

The certainty of Liara's touch stayed with me as I slept.

She had moved my head over her lap, letting me rest here. Better than lying my head over these old dusty pillows. Liara caressed my face; she smoothed down the edges of my hair, blending her softness over my scalp. We could've stayed like this for a while. A long while. If not for the next interruption that found us: the flickering of the city's lights outside the window. Those rays of hope that had glowed through the storm—they flickered on and off, dimming to dangerous levels, until the lights each cut out.

"Goddess, no… This looks far worse than a temporary power outage."

Tali rushed inside the room. "Liara, the whole city's power grid has failed! Everyone's losing heat!"

Stirring from the news, I tried my best to sit up. Liara didn't want me making any sudden movements. She and Tali supported me as I woke up—all the way up—sitting in place over the bed. I stared out to the cold horizon beyond the windows. The entire war seemed to halt as the Alliance realized what happened. No lights. No heating. No power sources for radios, computers, or other vital devices. Any food people had stored away in refrigerators would start to spoil. If they didn't freeze to death, then everyone in the city would eventually starve. At the airport, the 94, my apartment building. Everywhere.

Genuinely torn, Liara asked me, "Shepard, what should we do? People will no doubt start dying from the cold—even indoors—without adequate heat. The temperature has dropped to well below -80 degrees Celsius by now… But you still need more rest. We can't finish this mission without you leading us."

"We only have a few hours before people freeze to death. They're counting on us—now more than ever. We have to keep going!"

Pushing against this struggle, I forced myself to stand up anew.

Again Liara supported me. She helped me through this mind-ending, life-ending pain. I defied everything with her by my side. I stood up when I shouldn't have; I walked out of this room when I shouldn't have. Tali and Liara both stayed with me, heading down to the common room, even as I should have fallen.

I found my team gathered around this bonfire. The worry on their faces vanished somewhat once they saw me again. Everyone looked refreshed and ready to go. They just needed me to catch up with them.

General Victus didn't notice a thing. "Shepard, there you are. It would seem our much-needed rest has been interrupted. The city's power grid went out. Looks like a coordinated strike from the Reapers against multiple sources. They aimed for the most impact. It's unfortunate that they succeeded."

"All the more reason for us to keep going. Our only path forward is across that bridge."

"Yes, I agree. Luckily, because of the attack, the Reapers are spread out at the moment. They're doing their best to keep our allies from going in and repairing the city's grid. I'd say this gives your team an opportunity to sneak over the bridge, and through Coronado, mostly undetected. It's no guarantee."

"This is our only shot. It's time. Everyone, let's move!"

Out of the utmost respect, General Victus saluted me. I saluted him right back. Our silent, respective wishes of good luck to the other.

As we left the building, Victus went to support the N7 team providing that distraction to the south. They'd make sure the Reapers couldn't flank us as we crossed to the island. Meanwhile, I brought my team through this last stretch in Chicano Park, with pops of color from the destroyed murals over the broken walls. The highway-bridge was within reach. We just had to cross over and reach the beam.

We trudged through this snow that had piled over the bridge.

We circled around the masses of frozen, abandoned cars piled over the road. We used those same cars as leverage to grab hold of, to keep the wind from blowing us clear off the bridge. We doubled over, not to bow to the storm in submission, but to pierce headlong into the winds. We moved forward as one.

I gripped Liara's hand, needing her closer than close. I needed her support now more than ever.

Riding along this cliff, this edge of insanity—I had done it before. For years before. Mentally, emotionally. Not physically. Not like this. Hampered by the limitations of my condition, my physical weakness as my body kept breaking down. Still I pushed ahead, leading my team across this bridge. This was the risk I had taken in refusing to give up. The price I had to pay for my victories against the Reapers. I knew I had one last price to pay in bringing Harbinger down. Sacrifices to win this war.

However much I sacrificed, Harbinger refused to make this easy for us.

Claiming the island as its supposed territory, the Reapers' supreme general brought the fight to us.

Glows of gold through the frost, Harbinger's intimidating size appeared in the sky above our heads. There over the bridge as an army of one, our target had abandoned the beam, hell-bent on finding us. Mere mortals crossing this bridge, helpless to gaze up at its majestic size. I felt my team lose their nerve. They had stopped breathing to stare at that monster stealing the skies. We couldn't just stand here!

"It's about to fire at us! We need a biotic field, now!"

Raising up, Harbinger acted as I reacted, clawing its legs around its firing chamber, heating in the fog.

Aria woke the hell up first, taking the initiative. She raised her strongest protections above our heads. Samara and Liara layered their defenses with Aria's, their combined support glowing a stark violet-blue against the snow around us. Not taking any chances, I ordered our hybrid biotics to do the same. Wrex, Kaidan, and Miranda joined their strength to the field, fortifying and reinforcing as hard as they could.

Unable to help without biotics of their own, Tali, EDI, and Legion had locked in their helplessness.

I refused to fall to my fears—even as Harbinger beamed down its might over our shared defenses.

My refusals, my determination empowered the rest of our team.

Our biotics held on even as they struggled. Even as they screamed, their pained cries spanning the entirety of the frozen bay beneath the bridge. I called on the Alliance for backup, knowing they couldn't get anyone to us in time. Not with the rest of the city slowly freezing to death. So I believed in my team to hold on. They buckled and they wavered, but they fought their hardest to protect us—to protect me.

Kaidan ground out through his pain, "Shit, we need Jack with us! This is…this is too much!"

Aria refused to relent. "Shut up and keep this goddamned field going! Our lives are on the line! Shepard's life is on the line! I don't want any fucking excuses—"

No excuse, then, as the might of my team's determination worked against us.

For as hard as Harbinger beamed down on us, and as hard as we fought to defend ourselves, we couldn't win this fight. We didn't have complete control over the battlefield. The brittleness beneath us:

As our centermost point, the bridge beneath Aria's boots began to crack. Cracking and crumbling under the snow. Failing under the sheer magnitude of Harbinger's attack and our stubbornness to repel its force. The very ground we stood on started to sink, these foundations weakening and giving in. The entire fucking bridge gave out beneath us, plunging us down below! Suddenness of slipping down an incline of a rollercoaster; this out-of-control feeling overwhelming my core, my center of balance. This repeat of what had happened before in falling down to the waters, to this same bay. The ice shattered from the force of the falling bridge. Everyone fell through this jagged opening into the freezing water.

In this freefall, I grabbed hold of Liara, keeping her with me.

Our sound from above-ground broke as we hit the water.

Underwater after the crash—I reached for Tali's hand, pulling her with me, too, through the shocking-cold of this ice water. Paddling my legs as hard as they would go, I spotted the nearest land mass. Before I swam over in that direction, bringing Tali and Liara with me, I looked around. Kaidan had grabbed hold of Legion and EDI nearest to him. Samara, Miranda, and Aria swam after Wrex as he plunged down like a sinking boulder, the giant hump over his back and his short arms and legs working against him. Soon they grabbed hold of him, working together to swim in my direction. Kaidan did the same with EDI and Legion, their synthetic platforms suffering the worst malfunctions in this water. We all swam to safety.

Making landfall at the base of the island, everyone collapsed over the dry ground. No one left behind. Our suits of armor soaked over the icy land. We could hear the Earth's regular sound again. These sounds of war, and of the storm. Of everyone freezing around us, shivering from the worsened cold. I kept Liara and Tali close to me, glad that they gripped me for safety, for comfort. Miranda, Wrex, Kaidan, Aria, and Samara also sat in place, trying and failing to warm up after that scare. We couldn't help worrying over Legion and EDI the most. How Legion's child-like headlight glowed wider, as if saddened and discouraged, unable to change. EDI's head swiveled over her neck, her speech stuttering.

Out of order.

Staring up to the island's higher surface, I knew I needed to make a decision.

Harbinger had already retreated back to the beam. Maybe it assumed our team hadn't survived. Or maybe it posed another dare to me, daring me to go and find that beam, even now.

If my team stayed out here for too long, they would freeze to death. The more advanced safeties in my N7 armor had better protected me from that shock. The shock of the ice water practically immobilizing everyone. Glyph's perpetual warmth kept my team on this bleeding edge, moments away from completely freezing. The way Tali and Liara trembled against me…if we kept going, I knew they wouldn't make it.

No amount of magic from my leadership could change this risk.

I made the call: "Joker, we need an immediate evac to the Normandy! We took a fall and the team needs to warm up. I'm going on alone!"

"Shit, okay… It's gonna be dangerous, but I'll get to your location for the landing. Hang on!"

Liara and Tali gripped me harder, not wanting to let me go. They didn't want me to do this on my own.

I had to. They knew it.

By the time the Normandy landed near us, offering this brief sense of safety, they boarded with the rest of the team. They climbed atop the gangplank leading back inside the cargo hold. In this temporary reprieve from the cold, Dr. Chakwas helped everyone aboard, ready with thermal blankets. Jack and Garrus helped, too, the two of them looking much better off than before. Only Liara lingered with me.

Garrus understood. He came over to Liara, wrapping her in that blanket as she desperately needed. He held her up, supporting her as any friend would do. I wanted to do the same for her. I wanted nothing more than to go back home with her. Especially as Liara looked at me in this learned helplessness of hers. How she knew she couldn't stop this. She couldn't fight against these endless forces that now forced us apart. I had to push on alone. I had to push past Harbinger and reach the beam—by myself.

That blue light from the beam—faint in the fog—lit up the breadth of emotion shimmering in her eyes.

"Shepard, please don't go… Please don't leave me. Don't leave me behind."

As she reached out to me, I held her hand. Not to bring her with me. But for this touch. To remind her of what we had, and that nothing could take this away from us. In the past, on Ilos, I had gone on ahead to the Citadel by myself, seemingly leaving her behind. During the suicide mission, I had found that human Reaper on my own. And now this next ending had brought us here. Not because I wanted to go off by myself. Only out of necessity. As my way of protecting her and the rest of our team. I needed to do this.

Liara felt my meaning.

She knew exactly how I longed for her, how I wished I could stop everything for this moment.

"Liara, I need you…so much. I wish we didn't have to do this. I need you to trust me. Trust me to finish this mission—to keep you safe. You are everything to me. You're my motivation. I'll get through this—because of you. Always because of you. Always and forever."

Backing away, stepping away, Liara extended the length of our touch, our hands intertwined. As far as it would go. But I kept moving back, back down to the land below. Liara stayed in place, with Garrus still supporting her. I needed her to stay with the others as my second-in-command, as my executive officer. My wife. I needed to know Liara would take care of everyone. That she and the team remained safe on the Normandy. They would be okay. They would survive while I finished this, bringing everything home.

My ship took off, retreating back to the skies.

I took off, hurrying deeper into Coronado, cloaked to invisibility as I rushed down these snowy streets.

Making this final push all the way to the ruined Alliance base.

Pushing on as a lone infiltrator against the storm, against all odds.

Summoning every ounce of my strength, I headed for that beam in the distance.

Burning the icons of my omni-tool's radar into my sight, I maneuvered around the enemies in my way.

Again and again, second after second, I felt those temptations. The temptations to give up and give in, letting the elements take me. To give up and go off to the void, leaving this all behind. But I remembered my mission. I remembered my promises. I remembered this feeling from my team, reaching me, even now—their hopes, their wishes for me to win this. So I pushed past my exhaustion.

I crossed the island while cloaked, again using the blasted buildings and rusted vehicles around as shields from the winds. I skirted around the black ice on the roads, how the freeze had practically camouflaged into the asphalt beneath my boots. I passed by these dozens, if not hundreds of frostbitten corpses in the streets: of people who'd gotten run over, or shot down by the Reapers. I blocked everything else out, crossing through the entirety of Coronado, knowing the way. Knowing which streets to follow to reach the base. Knowing to not let Harbinger intimidate me—how its form loomed over the frozen horizon. I ran alone, and I struggled alone, but my team's unwavering belief stayed right with me.

Everyone else watched in a cold silence.

Unbreathing.

How they feared this would all end in a blaze of heart-wrenching failure. Because so much else before this moment had failed. Failures and heartbreak and endings and rage and betrayals. Sacrifices.

I sacrificed everything, running through this freezing cold.

The temperature on my omni-tool read: -101 degrees Celsius; -150 degrees Fahrenheit.

I ran for my life to force this warmth in my body.

I ran toward this approaching beam, there at the bottom of this crater of Harbinger's position. Again that gold glow of its sight—how it acted as a morbid ray of hope through this storm. I could've knelt before that power, before the frost. I could've easily collapsed and died on the spot. As if Harbinger itself told me to give up. As if this twisted nature told me to die. I refused, I refused, and I refused.

My mental strength propelled me forward, down this crater. Down this final battlefield in stealth.

My willpower kept me going, kept me running past these corpses from the Alliance. Countless soldiers that had made this journey, only to fail in the end. Not a single one had reached the beam. The beam there at the end of my grasp, within reach. My mental fortitude kept me whole. My memories.

Liara.

My goddess evermore.

My determination pushed me ahead now—from her. Running alone in this cold. No other support. I survived out in this impossible freeze of my own emotions. Knowing what awaited if I failed; if I succeeded. The immortality of carrying this burden forever. Never letting anyone down. Repeating this impossibility, of achieving the impossible again and again. Persisting alone for millions, billions, trillions, with Liara as my truest inspiration. My inspiration, preservation. I persevered because of her. Without Liara, without her love, without our connection, I would've given into this nihilistic void long ago.

"Everything that I am…is because of you."

The source of all I had become in defying nature, defying reason.

Exceeding my potential as I reached this beam.

I pushed and thrived and survived, all because of her.

Lifting up through this bright blue light, up to the skies, to the heavens. The eternal guiding light of this unknown brought me all the way up. Floating upward through the beam and into this inevitable known-unknown.