Chapter II: A Patchwork Black
"All the truth in the world adds up to one big lie." –Bob Dylan
Mizuki scowled in annoyance when he saw Iruka approach Naruto and begin demanding to know why the freshly minted genin had stolen one of village's most prized possessions.
"These things never really go as planned, do they?" The traitor asked himself before quietly unsheathing one of the fuuma shuriken on his back. "Oh well… bad timing, Iruka…"
The rogue chunin took careful aim at the back of his former student's head before swinging his arm and hurling the gigantic shuriken at him. Mizuki grimaced as the fuuma shuriken imbedded itself in the flesh of Iruka's back. The white-haired shinobi jumped down with a sneer of contempt.
"You just had to get involved, didn't you Iruka? You always were a bit too nosey, and now you've gone and butted into some personal business between Naruto and I…"
"Mi-Mizuki…" Iruka panted as he drew a kunai to defend himself with, "what is the meaning of this!?"
"Why, Naruto's just earning his spot as Rookie of the Year, is all!" Mizuki cackled, "And he was doing just fine until you decided to stick that scarred nose of yours where it didn't belong!"
Iruka gripped his kunai tighter. "You used him, Mizuki! What were you really plotting!?" The chunin snarled.
"Very well, I guess I might as well tell you… it really won't matter in a few moments…" Mizuki said, grasping for his other fuuma shuriken. "I've grown tired of being held back by this worthless village, so I've decided to go someplace where my talents will be appreciated… and I'm taking the Scroll of Seals with me. And, I've decided to offer Naruto a place by my side… a place where he'll be appreciated for what he–"
"Stop Mizuki, it's forbidden!"
"You're in no position to make any demands, Iruka!" The traitor yelled before turning to Naruto, "So how about it, Naruto? You wanna know why the villagers all shun you, do you know why they want you dead?"
Naruto felt his blood run cold; this was not what he expected. "What do you know about that?" He whispered.
Mizuki smirked as the bait was taken. "You know of the Yondaime's exploits, yes? Even you wouldn't neglect to learn about the most powerful shinobi that ever came from our village," Mizuki sneered, chuckling at his own joke, "But what do you really know about the night Kyuubi no Yoko attacked Konoha? Do you honestly believe a demon such as the Kyuubi can be killed?"
"What the hell are you talking about, Mizuki!?" Naruto demanded, drawing his own kunai.
"Don't listen to him, Naruto! Run! Find help!"
"SHUT UP, IRUKA!" Mizuki bellowed, "It's time he learned the truth. it's time someone was honest with Naruto… for you see, Naruto, Yondaime-sama couldn't defeat the Kyuubi, he was forced to seal it away with a jutsu that can be found in that very scroll. Twelve years ago, Hokage-sama used the Shiki Fuuin to seal the Kyuubi into a newborn baby… that child was you, Naruto! You are the Kyuubi no Yoko!"
"He's lying, Naruto! You are not the fox! You are its prison, no more, no less!" Iruka shouted, his hopes fading as he watched Naruto stiffen.
"Is it true, Iruka-sensei? Did Yondaime really do this to me…?"
"Naruto, I–"
"It is true, Naruto! The whole village has lied to you and treated you like garbage! But I offer you a different choice…"
The masked jinchuuriki looked up. "Choice?"
Mizuki's insane grin cracked wider. "Yes, join me and we'll leave this village behind for a place where our talents will be appreciated and nurtured! We will offer the Scroll of Sealing as a gift, and receive power for it!"
"No, Naruto! Don't let him have the scroll, he mustn't get his hands on it!"
"Forget about him, Naruto! He's just like the rest of those useless villagers; they don't care about you or what you have to offer! Give me the scroll, and together we'll make this village regret underestimating us!"
Iruka felt his heart break when he watched Naruto slowly make his way to Mizuki and offer the scroll; his blonde student's name dying on his lips as he fell into unconsciousness. "Naruto…"
The traitorous chunin cackled with glee as he accepted the scroll. "Excellent work, Naruto! Now we'll just set our sights on Ta no Kuni!"
Mizuki paused as he felt a small amount of resistance from Naruto when he attempted to take the scroll.
"Thanks for the information, Mizuki-sensei… I honestly didn't know about the Kyuubi. But I'm afraid we aren't going to be going anywhere tonight…"
The chunin's face quickly grew enraged. "What are you babbling about you little–"
"I meant that you won't be presenting Orochimaru with the Scroll of Sealing, Mizuki."
The white-haired man's eyebrows raised and his eyes widened. "H-How…?"
Naruto grinned under his mask; playing with "prey" was always amusing. "We know everything that goes on within the village walls, Mizuki. Especially things that concern the safety of our Sanctuary; it is in the Brotherhood's best interests that this particular artifact remains in the village, safe from Orochimaru's traitorous hands…"
Mizuki was beginning to sweat, when the Brotherhood set their sights on you, it always meant death. "W-Wait… we can work something out, I'll give you the scroll, and you let me walk away…"
Naruto shook his head in the nugatory. "We don't want the scroll, Mizuki; it would draw too much unwanted attention. The Brotherhood cares not about treasonous plays for power and inter-village politics; we are only ensuring that our… work remains–"
The genin stopped abruptly when he felt Mizuki's kunai pierce his ribcage.
"You won't be doing anything, you little shit!" Mizuki snarled triumphantly.
To the chunin's horror, he saw Naruto's mask stretch as he grinned, muttering the last word he would ever hear.
"Boom."
Two simultaneous explosions shook the small forest clearing as Naruto and the Scroll of Sealing erupted in a burning inferno that towered over the nearby trees. What was left of the traitorous chunin flew back, crashing into a tree before sliding down pitifully as the real Naruto dropped from his perch, the Scroll secured firmly around his torso.
"So stubborn, Mizuki-sensei… it didn't have to be this painful," Naruto remarked as he watched Mizuki quiver and struggle to hold onto life, even though three of his limbs were nothing but bloody stumps with jagged and charred bone protruding at odd angles.
"Still," Naruto muttered as he withdrew a kunai and small pouch from his jacket, "I suppose I owe you one small act of mercy for informing me of my… unique situation in life," the blonde explained as he drew a few violet petals and rubbed them on the blade of his kunai before gripping the dying man's head.
"Say hello to the Night Mother for me, Sensei," the assassin whispered before dragging the kunai across Mizuki's neck, putting the traitor out of his misery.
The blonde stood and began making his way over to Iruka, eternally grateful that his teacher had lost consciousness at the best possible time. The scarred shinobi would be able to confirm Mizuki's treachery when Naruto was hauled in for questioning.
The genin knelt down and gently shook his teacher awake. "Iruka-sensei, are you okay?"
The teacher slowly roused before jumping up and drawing another kunai. "Where's Mizuki!?" He shouted, head whipping around and scanning for threats.
"He's dead, Iruka-sensei," Naruto answered, pointing a finger in Mizuki's direction.
Iruka turned to look where Naruto was pointing.
He immediately regretted the action. The sight of his former colleague reduced to a helpless lump of flesh was indeed a shocking one… it was the type of violence he hadn't seen since the Kyuubi's attack–
Iruka shook his head to banish those thoughts; Naruto was not the Kyuubi. "What exactly did you do, Naruto?"
The young shinobi scratched the back of his head as he let out a dry chuckle. "Mizuki-sensei told me that if I stole the Scroll of Sealing and mastered a jutsu from it, I would be named Rookie of the Year over Sasuke. I managed to figure out that Mizuki was using me, but not before I learned the Bunshin Daibakuha…"
Iruka winced, that was truly a horrible way to go… "But if you did that, why did you slit Mizuki's throat?"
"He had lost, Iruka-sensei… there was no point in his continued suffering."
The chunin nodded, happy that his student possessed the capability for mercy. As much as Iruka was loathe to admit it, he knew that a lot of his former pupils would grow to like torture and killing, they would learn to take pleasure in the suffering of others; it was somewhat comforting to know that the student he thought of as an adopted brother of sorts had emerged from his first kill with his humanity intact… for now.
Iruka killed that line of thinking and placed a comforting hand on Naruto's shoulder. "I'm proud of you, Naruto. You showed quick thinking in a tough situation, and more importantly, you saved my life."
Naruto smiled behind his mask. "I've got you back, Iruka-sensei!"
The scarred ninja smiled back. "I'm glad… Now, I think we'd better get this scroll back to Hokage-sama, Naruto."
The blonde nodded as teacher and student made their way back to the village's main square. "Yeah… I don't suppose that you could include this incident when you decide who gets Rookie of the Year, could you?"
Iruka chuckled as he ruffled Naruto's hair. "Naruto, you stole a priceless village artifact and then you blew up a teacher! You've kind of removed yourself from the running…"
"Some might consider that as going the extra mile, Iruka-sensei…"
The chunin let out a hearty laugh as he steered his wayward student to the Hokage Tower.
"What did the Hokage tell you, Naruto-kun?"
"He simply explained that I was not going to be reprimanded for my actions and thanked me for returning the Scroll of Sealing."
"That's good–" cough, cough "–Naruto-kun. It seems your mission was a success, as dictated by the Speaker, I know confer upon you the rank of Assassin. Congratulations."
The masked blonde bowed. "Thank you, Hayate-sensei."
"Did anything else of importance happen?"
"No, Sensei. No one suspects that I was sent to assassinate Mizuki, they all believe I was tricked into being his patsy."
Hayate coughed before smiling and withdrawing a long, ornate black box. "I am proud of you, Naruto-kun. Over the past six years I have watched you grow in strength and cunning. You have taken to the way of the sword like a fish to water, and it has been an honor to instruct you. As Assassins, we are now equals… something that I am proud to say.
"However," Hayate continued after another cough, "you will be handling contracts of harder difficulty, and you are now eligible to be given contracts that involve other shinobi. These types of missions can prove quite dangerous, so I've gotten you something that will prove to be invaluable when you find yourself in an unfavorable situation."
"Thank you, Hayate-sensei." Naruto said as Hayate laid out the obsidian box on the table between them.
"This is the Ebony Blade, Naruto," Hayate explained as he opened the box, revealing a katana with a barely noticeable curve and simple black hilt, topped off with a bronze tsuba, and its scabbard. "Legend says that this blade is empowered with the blood of Sithis and blessed by the Night Mother herself. This is one of the finest swords known to man, and will never fail you. It is with a great deal of honor that I bequeath it to you."
Naruto reached out and accepted the offered katana. "Thank you, Hayate-sensei, it's beautiful," the blonde remarked as he examined the blade. The katana's hilt seemed unusually cool to the touch as Naruto ran his fingers over the numerous seals engraved into the pitch black hilt. "It truly is a masterpiece, Sensei."
The sickly jonin smirked. "You are indeed a lucky swordsman, Naruto-kun. But the Ebony Blade is made from a rare metal known for its rather unique properties… try channeling some of your chakra through it."
Naruto did as told and was shocked when black flames began to dance along the blade's edge before flickering and dying.
"It seems you'll need to continue your kenjutsu training if you ever hope to master 'Mephala's Bite.'"
The jinchuuriki sheathed the sword and bowed low. "Thank you for this gift, Hayate-sensei, I'll use it well."
Hayate gave a dry cough as he placed a hand on his pupil's shoulder. "I am sure you will remind this world why that blade is an artifact of legend, Naruto-kun."
"Is this a joke, Hokage-sama?"
Sarutobi sighed in resignation. "I assure you, Kakashi, the teams were placed as so for a reason."
"I am not an idiot, Hokage-sama. There is obviously a very specific reason you put this team together, and there is another– most likely more specific– reason you have charged me with their training…"
"You know that no one else can train–"
"I meant besides the obvious fact that I can help the Uchiha further develop his Sharingan, Hokage-sama." Kakashi politely interrupted.
The elderly man glared at his subordinate before withdrawing three folders and laying them out on his desk. "Read them, but remember that what they contain stays between us."
The silver-haired jonin grabbed the three files and gave each one a onceover, his lone visible eye widening after he finished each file.
"These three genin are unique, Kakashi. We are placing the Nara, Yamanaka, and Akimichi clan heirs together because their clan jutsu have been proven to be most useful when combined. The Hyuga, Inuzuka, and Aburame will make one of the best tracking and retrieval teams the village has ever seen… but Naruto, Sasuke, and Sakura will be something more, Kakashi."
The copy-nin was beginning to see where Sarutobi was going; he hoped he was wrong.
"Why are they even allowed to be ninja? According to their files, Naruto is believed to have killed over a fifty-seven people from several of the neighboring villages, Sasuke is obsessed with gaining power to surpass his brother, and Sakura is nothing more than a smaller version of Anko with a revenge complex… why are any of them allowed to wear hitai-ite?"
Hiruzen withdrew his pipe and lit, inhaling the sweet smoke. "Because there is nowhere else for them, Kakashi; shinobi is all they have. Do you honestly think this village would accept Sasuke as anything but a shinobi? Do you think someone in Sakura's position could accept anything less than justice?"
The jonin nodded, acknowledging the Hokage's argument. "But what about Naruto, Hokage-sama?"
Kakashi watched Sarutobi glance out the window and stare forlornly at the Hokage monument, looking every one of his sixty-eight years.
"What else does the boy have, Kakashi? Twelve and a half years ago, we decided that the need of the many outweighed the need of any one individual. It was an easy and logical choice for Minato, Jiraiya, and I to make; had we not, the village would not be standing today. But what about young Naruto? Out of everyone living in this village, he is the only person standing on the other end of that choice."
The Hokage sagged in his chair and Kakashi found himself truly pitying the man. "I'll never forget watching Minato's heart break when he realized what he was condemning his son to. I have survived two Shinobi Wars, and nothing will ever compare to that haunted look in Minato's eyes when he realized that he had been forced to compare the worth of his only son to that of the village and conclude that the village had won.
"The entire populace of the village has shunned and hated him until they drove him into the arms of the Dark Brotherhood. We all prospered and moved forward while no one bothered to consider the little boy who was left behind." The Hokage took another deep drag from his pipe before leveling his gaze at Kakashi. "Your three students have one thing in common, one fact about them that unites them."
"What is that, Hokage-sama?" Kakashi asked, intrigued by Sarutobi's tale of his late sensei's last moments with Naruto.
"Not one of them has anything to tie them to this village. Sasuke seeks the power to destroy Itachi, something that the other villages would be more than willing to give him in exchange for the Sharingan. Sakura is determined to find her father's murderer and avenge him, a task that does not require her to remain in the village. And Naruto… his loyalty belongs to the Brotherhood, so long as he has them, he doesn't need us.
"You see, Kakashi, they have been placed under your instruction because you are the only one capable of handling them. You are the best jonin under my command and I am tasking you with their training because if these three aren't handled properly, they may very well turn against us to achieve their own goals. And I honestly don't think we could come out victorious against the power the three of them have to throw at us."
The jonin sat down and pinched the bridge of his nose. "What is it you want me to do exactly, Hokage-sama?"
Sarutobi exhaled another lungful of smoke as he collected the files and put them away. "Train them, Kakashi. Help them realize that there is more to life than vengeance, killing, and hatred. I know it won't be easy, but you have to show them that they haven't seen or done it all yet. I need you to get them ready to handle missions that I won't be able to assign to other shinobi."
Hiruzen Sarutobi set down his pipe and looked straight into Kakashi's visible eye, over fifty years of shinobi life swimming behind his dark brown orbs. "I need you to turn them into this village's next 'Shadow' team."
"Hokage-sama, with all due respect, do you have any idea of what you're asking of me? How can you possibly expect me to train another set of Sannin? Don't you remember how that turned out the first time?"
"I am not asking you turn them into the next Sannin, Kakashi. The time to be blunt has arrived," Sarutobi answered, "They are killers. One of them has killed before, and the others will kill in the future. I am asking you to take these three children and help train them to kill the right people, train them to be the saviors of this village, capable of handling the gravest of problems."
Kakashi shifted uncomfortably in his chair. "But Hokage-sama, why me? What makes you think I can succeed where you failed? How can you possibly think that I am capable of turning these three genin into Sannin-caliber shinobi?"
The aged Hokage smiled. "Because, Kakashi, you are the only one capable of truly understanding them."
"What the fuck are you wearing?"
"Language, Sasuke-kun. There are ladies present," Sakura chided, indicating herself and their other female classmates.
"Hn. Answer the question, dobe."
The Uchiha's interest had been captured when his blonde classmate had entered the classroom dressed in a most peculiar fashion. The katana strapped horizontally to Naruto's lower back had only added to Sasuke's curiosity.
"This," Naruto began indicating his attire, "is what we call a shinobi shouzoku or 'ninja gear' for our more challenged students. It's what a ninja wears, Sasuke-chan. Do you know what a ninja is? Come on… those people who jump real high, run real fast, throw sharp things, and use fancy jutsu…"
"Hn." The Uchiha sneered, once again closing his eyes and leaning back in his seat.
Naruto grinned beneath his mask as he made his way to his seat between Hinata and Shikamaru. "He he he. Naruto: 1, Sasuke-chan: 0…"
"Good m-morning, Naruto-kun."
"Mornin', Hinata-chan!" The blonde answered as he plopped down into his seat.
A resigned sigh caught the masked shinobi's attention. "Naruto, as troublesome as it is to ask, is there a particular reason you're dressed like that?"
The Nara heir found his friend's new appearance to be rather odd. Naruto was clad in a sleeveless, black ninja gi that he had tucked into a very loose fitting pair of shinobi pants that were tied off at Naruto's knees and tucked into a pair of armored greaves that protected his shins and feet, which were currently occupying a pair of tabi boots. The jinchuuriki also wore a pair of gauntlets to match his greaves that extended from his knuckles to his elbows; the entire ensemble was completed with a black mesh undershirt and Naruto's usual shinobi mask.
The Kyuubi container chuckled and scratched the back of his head. "Heh… I like to think I'm in my 'work clothes…'"
Before the shadow user could respond, Iruka entered the classroom and informed the graduates that the time for team assignments had come.
"Before I announce the teams, I'd just like to say how proud I am of all of you. I've spent the last six years training all of you, and I am confident when I say that I expect…" The chunin trailed off as he spotted a familiar mop of blonde completely covered in black clothing. "…Naruto, what the hell are you wearing…?"
"Work clothes…" Was Naruto's half-hearted reply as Hinata attempted to hide her giggles.
Iruka shook his head, far too used to his student's eccentricities to be too perturbed by his odd style of dress. "Anyway, I look forward to hearing of all of your future accomplishments, and believe me when I say I expect great things from you all. Now for the teams…"
Hinata fidgeted in her seat as she heard Iruka begin listing off teams until a familiar name drew her attention. "Please let me be with Naruto-kun…"
"Team 7: Naruto Uzumaki, Sasuke Uchiha, and Sakura Haruno… Team 8: Kiba Inuzuka, Shino Aburame, and Hinata Hyuga… Team 9…"
The Hyuga heiress sighed as her hopes were crushed. "You are on a very talented team, Naruto-kun."
The blonde grinned as he patted Hinata on the back, causing her to blush slightly. "Of course it's a talented team, Hinata-chan; I'm on it, after all!" Naruto joked before adopting a more somber tone. "I'm sorry we couldn't be on the same team, though. Even if we would have been stuck with our lazy-ass friend, it would have been worth it, Sunshine."
Hinata smiled at the play on her name. "It'll be alright, Naruto-kun. I'm sure Sakura-chan will be able to keep you out of trouble."
"…Team 10: Shikamaru Nara, Chouji Akimichi, and Ino Yamanaka…"
When Iruka finished listing off the new teams he once again wished them all luck before departing to begin preparing all the paperwork to have the students' files transferred over to the shinobi registry.
Naruto leaned back in his chair while he idly chatted with Hinata and Shikamaru until a woman with tussled brown hair and dark, crimson eyes entered and announced herself as Kurenai Yuuhi, jonin commander of Team 8. The blonde bid goodbye to Hinata and wished her luck, promising to catch up with her when he got the chance. The waiting continued until a man smoking a cigarette arrived and introduced himself as Asuma Sarutobi, jonin commander of Team 10.
The jinchuuriki grinned as Shikamaru sighed heavily and slouched away, his only farewell a lazy wave of his hand.
Shaking his head at the Nara's laziness, Naruto turned to examine his new teammates. Sakura and Sasuke were in their usual seats next to each other, Sakura casually twirling a kunai on her finger– a look of absolute boredom plastered on her face– while Sasuke sat back in his chair, eyes closed and fingers steepled.
The Pinkette noticed Naruto looking in their direction and gently nudged her desk mate. "Sasuke-kun, how about we go sit with Naruto and start… 'bonding' as a team. You know… get to know each other a little better, we'll be working together for awhile, after all."
"No." He didn't even bother to open his eyes.
Sakura rolled her eyes and began walking over to Naruto, stopping and raising an eyebrow when the blonde coughed into his hand. "What was that?"
"Oh, nothing, just a little cough. Erhm! Erhmsasukesapussyerhm!"
The pinkette's eyebrow ticked. "I hate that word, Naruto. It's so damn disgusting!"
Naruto's mask stretched slightly as he grinned. "It's a normal word, Sakura-chan. 'Pussy,' it's just part of being a girl," Naruto stated matter-of-factly before adding, "Nothing disgusting about it."
The girl huffed in exasperation. "Ugh! Boys throw that fucking word around so casually! Like any of you would even know what to with one," she scoffed.
Naruto was thankful his mask hid the blush coloring his cheeks, but his pride would not allow him to back down. "Well how about you let me take you out tonight after we meet our sensei, and I'll show what I know…" The jinchuuriki proposed with a suggestive wink.
"Why wait… Naruto-kun…" Sakura asked as she slowly sauntered over to her blonde teammate. "We're in a classroom, after all," she continued, using her foot to slide Naruto's chair away from the long desk, "How about you teach little old me exactly what you can do with one…" Sakura whispered as she sat down, straddling Naruto's lap and causing his eyes to go wide.
"S-Sakura-chan…?"
"Come on, Naruto-kun," she whined, leaning into him to whisper into his ear, "You talk too much… but I know that tongue of yours is gotta be good for something else…" Sakura suggested in husky voice.
Naruto shivered when he felt Sakura's nails scrape over his scalp as she entwined some of his hair in her fingers and tugged gently. "I…"
Next to Naruto's ear, Sakura grinned triumphantly, Anko's words ringing in her ears.
"They think with the head between their legs and are conditioned to respond a specific way to every situation. When you act disgusted, they think they've won and act accordingly. Call 'em on it; make them try and think with the head on their shoulders… signals get crossed and it's like watching a chicken run around after getting its head lopped off."
Sakura pushed forward, forcing Naruto back and sending the chair crashing to the ground. The blonde genin suddenly found himself flat on his back with Sakura straddling his chest, pressing a kunai to his throat. "What's wrong, Naruto-chan? No witty comeback? Cat got your tongue? Or maybe you've just realized that–"
"I hope I'm not interrupting anything."
The pinkette looked up to see a tall, masked man with a mop of silvery hair standing in the doorway. Comprehension dawned on her and she dropped her kunai.
The masked shinobi chuckled. "A good first impression if I ever saw one," he remarked with the smallest of giggles, "Meet me up on the roof when you're all finished here." The jonin instructed before disappearing in a swirl of leaves.
Sasuke immediately shunshin'd away, eager to escape the classroom and put the six years spent sitting through Iruka's lectures behind him.
Sakura, with as much dignity as one could muster while blushing like a tomato, gently rose off of Naruto and fixed him with a stern glare. "I hope you've learned your lesson," was all she could come up with before she turned on her heel and made her way out of the room, praying to God that her new jonin sensei wouldn't tell Anko about what he saw.
"Now that everyone's here," the jonin began once Naruto came up the stairs and sat to the far right placing Sasuke between himself and Sakura, "we can begin the introductions!"
"What exactly are we supposed to say?" Sakura asked.
The jonin scratched his chin. "Hmmm… names, likes, dislikes, hobbies, dreams for the future… all that good stuff."
"Why don't you go first then, and show us how it's done, Sensei?"
"Fair enough. My name is Kakashi Hatake. Likes and dislikes… hmmm… you gotta enjoy the little things, I suppose. Dreams for the future… I haven't really given it much thought. Hobbies… I'm a man of many interests."
The three genin could only stare at their sensei as he gave a self-satisfied nod of approval before pointing to Sakura. "You're up first, Anko Jr."
The pinkette scowled. He was definitely going to tell Anko. "My name is Sakura Haruno. I enjoy hanging out with Anko-neechan, and I despise idiot boys who don't know which head to think with," at this point Sakura shot Naruto a pointed glare and the blonde gave her a cheerful wave in return, "My hobbies include reading and cooking, and my dream for the future is to see a long forgotten murder case solved, and the one responsible brought to justice."
Kakashi nodded and pointed to Sasuke. "You're up next, Sleepy."
Two crimson eyes opened to glare at Kakashi before Sasuke finally began, his Sharingan never deviating from Kakashi's masked face. "My name is Sasuke Uchiha. I like very few things, but some of the things I dislike include the Sun, loud noises, and Naruto–"
"Love you, too, Sasuke-chan!"
"–I don't have hobbies, and the only thing certain in my future is that I will finish another man's work by killing him and ending what he started."
The jonin raised an eyebrow. "What about your clan? Do you not wish to restore it?"
The six tomoe in Sasuke's eyes sped up as the teen stared long and hard into Kakashi's lone visible eye before speaking. "Uchiha is dead."
"Interesting," Kakashi muttered as Sasuke once again closed his eyes, "And now, the stereotype of our little group…"
Naruto cocked his head to the side. "'Stereotype?'"
"Well, the shinobi shouzoku fell out of favor over a hundred years ago. At the time, it was what every ninja wore, regardless of rank, affiliation, or gender. When civilians tell cliché stories about ninja lurking in the night, the shinobi shouzoku is what they're talking about."
Naruto adopted a thinking pose, cupping his chin with his hand. "That's an interesting point, Kakashi-sensei. But, tell me, did you ever wonder why it was universally worn by every ninja at the time? Maybe the only reason it became a cliché reference was because everyone was wearing it… and maybe the only reason everyone was wearing it was because it was effective. Clichés and stereotypes only exist because the masses have put them into widespread use, but that doesn't mean that the original idea behind them is flawed."
"Interesting," Kakashi remarked, "But how do explain the mask?"
"My face is my own business."
"I like this one, he's got the right mindset to go far…" "If you say so, but you neglected to introduce yourself."
The blonde scowled and crossed his arms. "Fine. I'm Naruto Uzumaki, I like ramen, and kenjutsu. I dislike ignorant people and assholes who think they're better than everyone else. My hobbies are training, learning new jutsu, and horticulture. And dreams for the future… well, I guess I'd like to settle down and start a family of my own." Naruto divulged, his eyes softening at the mention of beginning a family.
"An odd dream for a shinobi…" "Excellent!" Kakashi stated, ignoring the fact that the only real things his students told him were their names. "Now, the three of you will need to meet me at training ground thirty-seven at six a.m. tomorrow morning for your survival test."
"What's the point of this test, Kakashi-sensei," Sakura asked.
"Well, you've all passed the graduation exams, but that doesn't necessarily mean you're ready for the responsibility of being a shinobi. Tomorrow, every team will be tested by their jonin sensei, and only about thirty-three percent of them will pass. Those that pass will begin undertaking missions, those that fail will return to the Academy for six months of 'remedial training.'"
Kakashi repressed a chuckle as his three students shuddered in horror. "Well… I believe that's it for today. I assume you're all eager to begin preparing for the exam, so I'll leave you with some free advice: Naruto, you might want to skip breakfast, otherwise that mask will ensure you drown in your own vomit. Sakura, don't bother asking Anko about the test, the only thing she can tell you is that I've failed every genin team I've ever been given. And Sasuke, go home and take a nap; you'll need that Sharingan of yours at full power if you hope to make it through tomorrow without a nasty case of chakra exhaustion."
The jonin watched in satisfaction as Naruto glanced forlornly in the direction of Ichiraku Ramen, Sasuke bristled in anger, and Sakura paled at the realization that Anko wasn't going to be able to save her this time.
"Guess I'll see you kids bright and early tomorrow morning!" Kakashi said jovially before he vanished in swirl of leaves.
Sakura, Naruto, and Sasuke simply stood there, struggling to comprehend the horrible turn of events, the phrases "failed every genin team" and "six months of remedial training" the only thing occupying their thoughts as a gentle breeze rustled their hair and clothing.
Finally, after what seemed like hours of silence, their reverie was broken by Naruto who had finally discovered the proper way to describe their situation.
"Fuck."
No one had the heart to contradict him.
A/N: Well that was a fun one to write, particularly the classroom scene. Ah, high school… so awkward and unpleasant when girls become offended by crass language. Looking back on it all, I probably should have just shut the fuck up and saved everyone the trouble. Oh well, censorship is for communists. Anyway, this chapter actually served a purpose, gotta feed you all a little bit of characterization before we move too far ahead. You might want to keep the title and quote in mind as you think it over, too; everything serves a purpose. As for the Ebony Blade, that's a little something for all the Oblivion fans, plus it hints at the larger picture when one considers its demonic origin. As always, I welcome all questions and comments, so you should review to make me feel better. See you next time for the Bell Test.
-Andrew
