CHAPTER 29: THE FAT LADY SINGS

The next morning at breakfast, Analese and Ella were back to their usual routine of devouring over half a dozen double-chocolate muffins and a stack of chocolate chip pancakes.

"What did I tell you, my brother?" Fred flashed a cocky grin to his twin as he took his seat across from the Honorary Gryffindor.

As the sisters sent skeptic looks to the pair, the Great Hall doors crashed open and slammed against the wall. In walked the Slytherin Quidditch captain, dressed in a surprising outfit. Now, Snape as a cat lady was brilliant but was surpassed in greatness by this prank.

Flint's usual scowl was even more noticeable with the addition of Gryffindor red lipstick. His narrowed eyes were heavily lined with ebony black eyeliner. The shadow that was covering the span from his thickly mascara-accented eyelashes to his freshly plucked eyebrows was shimmering, metallic gold. His nonexistent cheekbones were coated with blush, completing his heavy stage makeup.

Flint's fashion choice for the day was entirely out of uniform, not to mention gender. He was dressed in the attire of a female Viking. The bodice was held up with invisible straps, lucky for the population of Hogwarts. The top of the costume was a replica to that of a famous opera singer, down to the snail shell swirl-like bra. The skirt reached Flint's pudgy knees, revealing his 'glow-in-the-dark' white legs. It was similar to the skirt that Xena, the Warrior Princess from Muggle comic books and television show wore.

On top of his head was a Viking helmet with two long, black braided pigtails swinging down past his shoulders and reaching his waist.

Every person eating a cinnamon roll dropped their food and spat out the bite they had been chewing. The people who had ever read or watched 'Xena' now silently vowed to never willingly see her again.

As Flint walked to the only seat at his table that was left, which happened to be way up by the staff table, the students behind him started snickering, having seen something that snapped them from the shocked trance. Not even trying to be polite, the Gryffindors simply broke out into hysterics. Taped to Flint's back was a message from the Muses.

Figuring out what was so funny, Flint grabbed blindly for the paper. His hand finally gripped the parchment and pulled. The phoenix of the Muses had been taped to his back, and unbeknownst to the Slytherin, had a replication charm on it. When the top parchment was removed, an exact copy was conjured out of thin air.

As Flint finally reached the open spot at the Slytherin table, McGonagall recovered from her disbelief. She stood from her seat at the staff table beside Dumbledore. "Flint, why are you out of uniform?" she demanded angrily.

Flint hesitated for a few moments, finally deciding that not answering the stern professor was worse than having everyone know the worst part of the prank. "I do not know." the replying voice was that of a female soprano opera singer.

The high notes triggered the cartoon-inspired announcement. A loud, resounding bang exploded at the ceiling. A tightly wound roll of parchment shot out from a cannon that was hovering in the left corner behind the staff table.

As it unraveled, the real message from the notorious Muses was revealed, written in a neat, curling script.

'The Muses, having warned you fairly, will give you until after lunch to break the engagement. If you fail to meet this demand, the pranks will not only escalate in occurrence, but also in amount of humiliation. Once again, thank you for your continuous and willing participation.'

Fred and George had no idea that the Muses had another prank for this week. Now, the twins couldn't believe how perfect the entire week had ended.

"Engagement is off, Sinesstra." Flint's soprano voice rang out as he raced out the Great Hall.

"I guess it's true what they say." Analese stated thoughtfully.

"What's that?" the twins inquired.

"It ain't over till the Fat Lady sings." the sisters chorused, highly amused.