Janus — The Heirs, He Who Wishes To Wear the Crown, Endure Its Weight

-Ship Voyage arc-

Chapter XLIII:

I Don't Need A Man, So I Can't Be A Lady (Damaged Lady)


Title: Janus (Sequel to 'A Kiss To My Prince and The King 2 Hearts)

Summary: Yuri's character is like a thorn bird, strong and courageous who continues to embrace people around her but she can only brings out her best at the cost of great pain. A thorn bird is a mythical bird who searches for a thorn tree from the day it is born. When it finds it, the bird impales itself upon the sharpest thorn, and rises above the agony to sing the most beautiful song ever heard.

Pairing: Sebastian x OC x Ciel with Claude x OC x Alois


"My name is Yuri Park. There was an incident and I woke up in 1887. Am I mad, in a coma, or back in time? Whatever's happened, it's like I've landed on a different planet. I decided to stay in this world...and this is my story."


Thank you guys for those who reviewed and alerted my other story: 'A Kiss To My Prince' and 'The King 2 Hearts'

'A Kiss To My Prince'

Guest#1- Thank you so much! ^^ Glad you enjoyed it keke!

Guest#2- Kuku who shall have them with Yuri soon! Of course, but remember Hannah also meant Ciel and Alois too in a sense that even if they were humans, their heart/behaviours is as dark as devil.

Guest#3- Haha glad you love the harem! More to come~!

Cruly Fries- Thanks for reading ^^

'Janus'

Dontgotaclue88- Keke glad you loved it! Hope this chapter is up to your expectation ^^

VampireSiren- Haha well I guess for once my timing was perfect! (I am infamous for having worst timing) MechaCon?! OMG I hope you had lovely time there! Wish I could one day visit it! Johnny Yong Bosch?! I know him because I used to watch power rangers lol! Childhood time, brings back memory! But also because he is Korean decedent! So did you got his autograph? Yes Ciel is spoiling Yuri with plenty of gifts! Let's hope Sebastian will know how scary Yuri will be if he kills her dog haha!

Wonderwomanbatmanfan- I know right! When I saw they took Ciel out and replace with a girl in guy disguise I was like NO BRING BACK CIEL! But its set in modern time so I guess they had to ㅠoㅠ Although I will forever be sad there's no Ciel, the movie actually looks promising!

sebby-fan- Well he's gonna have to learn to live with it! LOL! Cuz Pluto is here to stay for a longgg~~~ time!

Mirage- Yuri favor all four of them equally but it was Ciel whom she met first and came to like when she came into Kuroshitsuji world so Ciel will always have that special place in her heart. Yes it will be some time before Yuri turns into a demon but fingers cross it won't be THAT long..

AriaTheScarletRose- Yes it's Ronald Knox! Yuri will meet him later keke!

xXxStrawberryJamxXx- I love criminal mind too! And yes I got the zugzwang reference from CM! OMG I know right! Hated for killing Maeve off like that! Poor Reid! Hahaha yes Yuri as a nun?! Well that will be one hell of a party!

Cereza101- Yes I am going to include Undertaker's theory! It will be nice and mystery! Not to mention, one of the theory was actually right! I don't know because I'm actually following the manga plot strictly and even I'm confused whether he's good or bad..it's like he's in between. Well just in case, have some sugar honey iced tea handy! Haha!

SomeoneThatExists- Glad you loved the chapter! Which quotes may I ask? Glad the extra info was helpful! I wouldn't want my readers to get confuse and having to search them up!

Yugao702- I apologise for the embarrassment I've caused ㅠ-ㅠ Well, Ciel is a demon now and he have to have and know everything! He is young but his personality is definitely not! Titanic was the greatest film ever made, I watched the 3D version when it was 100th anniversary which I think was 2 years ago.. *Cry* I actually wrote this while watching Titanic so hope it gives off those melancholy vibe..ooh...bad idea eating when watching zombie film or book..except popcorn.

LufenCrosszeria- HERE'S THE SHOVEL! *Hands the shove* I'm actually finding myself unable to sleep..is it possible to feel unsafe when you're suppose to be sleeping?! I'm really tempted to put sharp, pointy things under the slipper you know for 'self-defense' *wink wink* Yes save my soul..seriously! My brother is so sensitive like a girl on PMS! Ughh! I wasn't that bad when I was going through puberty! OMG my friend is like that with Infinite and B2ST! She even threatened to hurt my family unless I go to Infinite and Super Junior concert with her -_- Extreme fangirls scares me...I have a feeling Ciel as a dog would be like those pampered, spoilt dog who expect everyone to be his beck and call..kinda like a cat! Hahaha! 'DDDUUUUUUHHH. UH WHAT? YOU WANT UH RULER?!' Add a calculator there as well hahaha! Join the club sistar #FailOfAnAsian! I wrote this when I was watching Titanic and listening to 'My Heart Will Go On'...ㅠㅠ I haven't cried like that since my dad stole my Ben & Jerry ice cream..enjoy~!

Paxloria- Thank you ^^ for the scene when Arthur ran out, I've recorrected it so Claude, Alois or Yuri was not there when Snake explained how he ended up there so thanks for pointing that out :) OMG it's like you've read my mind XD yes, Sebastian and Claude will go down to cargo to sort those zombies out before the party but kukuku there will be a plot twist.

lexi- Glad you loved this chapter hehe! Hope you like this one too! Well I kinda followed the half season 1 of Kuroshitsuji anime then sipped into manga arcs then into season 2 of Kuroshitsuji anime. After that, I went into manga arc once again since anime was finished and I wasn't satisfied with the anime's ending ㅠㅠ and in my opinion, the manga plot was far more appealing.

darkangel- Haha yes I love that page! Share with some of my friends and there are some funny ones we literally LOL in middle of the class because of that haha! Glad you liked the rewritten version ^^ yes, the Spanish version link is on my profile hehe thank you! Awww thanks although I still know I can improve my ability as a writer more. OMG thank you so much for

FanFicForever21- Thank you for your warm welcome ^^ I'm excited too with the ship arc kekeke! Hope you enjoy this chapter!

myonesecret- Thanks so much! XD Here's the update you've been waiting for! Enjoy~!

Areanell- Woah? Blown away?! Catch my hand! (If it's not too late) 0_0 In a week? That's very quick! I don't know if I'm allowed to accept such prestigious compliments *blushes* I really hope you will enjoy this chapters :)

MrsGooglyBear- I hope this chapter is worth the wait! XD Hope you enjoy!

sleepy kirby- I have no social life..we should like make a club for it hahaha! Hahaha hope you weren't suddenly bursting out into laughter in front of oblivious people because that happened to me probably more than I can count and yea...this society still do not accept bursting out into random laughter as normal! Sasuke..I don't even know what's going on with him..glad he wasn't born as a girl or the world might end because he don't have his morning coffee or something XD I cried during that emotional reunited/bonding moments between the father and son! Yep, it's translated into Spanish keke thank you! Oh yes, Grade 12 is tough alright ㅠㅠ hope it will be worth it! There better be those end of year party teachers were discussing about. Fighting! ;) (I love KPOP too)

DeathlyIceMaiden- Here's more! XD Enjoy~!

Shiroranzuki- Wow..finished the stories in one day...damn. Can you read 2000 words in a second or something? Here's another chapter you've been waiting for and hope you enjoy it!

fairuz- Keke don't worry, hope this chapter will save you from dying :D Glad you liked it! Enjoy~!

Maesha Fairuz- Woah! My fan! So nice to meet you XD Glad you love my (imperfect) writing. Well, who will get stabbed by Undertaker? There will be a twist keke! OMG William will definitely come and hope you will love it when he does my choto bon (I don't know if it's right but it meant 'little sister', do correct me if I'm wrong ㅠㅠ) So I made you Alois fan XD My my, Yuri in danger and surrounded by zombies= 4 overprotective, ultra-angry demons.. someone read my mind *wink wink*

Guest#1- Thanks for reading and hope you enjoy this chapter!

Guest#2- Hehe you will see Claude, Sebastian and Yuri interacting more in later chapter :)

Enchanted Elf- So happy you loved the chapter :D and no you didn't comment twice just to assure you but I don't mind at all! Yes, Yuri has a dog named Pluto! Whoo hooo! Well, Ciel was Yuri's first love and first person to meet so Ciel will always have a special place in her heart. I mean, most of us can't forget our first love for a lifetime.

chibiamu- Don't worry! Hope you internet is fixed and don't worry, my computer have been having its own problem as well so I understand how frustrating it can be! XD thank you for such great, prestigious compliments even though I'm still imperfect and have long way to go ㅠㅠ Hope you love this chapter as my previous ones! OMG you would dedicate your story to me?! XD I actually screamed when I read your review and I was literally standing in middle of London so you can imagine the crowds looking at me like I was some mad woman haha! We are already messaging each other and just skype or PM me or anything! Oh, do PM me on FF when you want to skype because I normally logged out in my phone to save my batteries (when I'm logged on for the whole day on my phone, they drain my battery so quick) I used to have tumblr but I deleted the account because I didn't know how it worked and it was so complicating...ㅠㅠ and then I created another because my friends keep nagging me but I don't really go there much but here's my tumblr ID: blueciel

I also have FB and twitter and I'm active on either two by the way.

MizukiUchiha1999- Yuri's reference to Titanic..I mean who wouldn't when you know you're actually walking to your ship of doom with your own two feet willingly(?) haha!

Guest#3- Here's the update! Hope you enjoy and thanks for reading :)

Guest#4- Yuri will interact more with Claude and Sebastian later chapter ^^

Melissa Fairy- Thanks for reading ^^ I have explained to your question via PM :)

Otaku1267Freak- Well here's another long chapter! Yes the story is quite long but it is following the manga plot til the end. I apologise for making you re-read my stories when there is more interesting stories around ㅠㅠ kuku well, their marriage won't be for anytime because Yuri wants her mum there no matter what. Their kids would be so cute..have you seen half Korean, half English children?! I have and they are the most cutest half bloods ever! XD


This chapter contains: 5th Arc of Kuroshitsuji manga 'Ship Voyage Arc' chapter 52.


"A strong woman understands that the gifts such as logic, decisiveness, and strength are just as feminine as intuition and emotional connection. She values and uses all of her gifts." Nancy Rathburn


Damaged lady: -A woman who is emotionally affected by something, that might damage her chances at forming a new relationship with someone.

-Someone whose personal history is weighed down with excess unresolved emotional baggage.

-A woman with a once happier time in her life and their ultimate loss of innocence.


-1st Day, April 17th-

The crowd of cheering well-wishers waves heartily as a black wall of metal moves past them. Impossibly tiny figures wave back from the ship's rails. Campania gathers speed. The bow wave spreads before the mighty plow of the liner's hull as it moves down the River Thames toward the English Channel.

On the catwalk Thomas Andrews, the shipbuilder, watches carefully as the engineers and greasers scramble to adjust valves.

Towering above them are the twin reciprocating engines, four stories tall, their ten-foot-long connecting rods surging up and down with the turning of the massive crankshafts. The engines thunder like the footfalls of marching giants.

In the boiler rooms the Stokers chant a song as they hurl coal into the roaring furnaces. The 'black gang' are covered with sweat and coal dust, their muscles working like part of the machinery as they toil in the hellish glow.

The enormous bronze screws chop through the water, hurling the steamer forward and churning up a vortex of foam that lingers for miles behind the juggernaut ship.

Smoke pours from the funnels as the riven water flares higher at the bow as the ship's speeds builds. Captain Smith steps out of the enclosed bridge onto the wing. He stands with his hands on the rail, looking every bit the storybook picture of a Captain... a great patriarch of the sea.


Up on the deck, six figures stood and faced each other.

"Did you brought what I asked of you?" Ciel asked or more like demanded, his hand outstretched expectedly.

Alois simply smiled before dropping two glistening objects into his palms, "Of course. Since my uncle is a member it was not that hard to obtain the badge."

Upon close observation, I realised the two badges was an aurora society membership ones that would give them access in a way would not be outed as first timers. But it was the number of the badge that puzzled me before the realisation dawned me in a way I could relate.

The two was obviously meant for Sebastian and Ciel, Madame Red would probably have one herself but undoubtedly collecting dust somewhere in her house from long nonuse, Ciel didn't want his aunt anywhere near when they experiment with it. From fear for her safety and perhaps quite cruelly, one less person to look out for constantly.

Ciel had ordered me to put Elizabeth, her family, me and Madame Red to the lifeboats and get out to safety if the disaster could not be stop in controllable level.

I ran up to embrace Hannah, whom was dressed in a simple blue dress, before realisation dawned me, "What are you doing here? The ship might sink!"

"I'm a demon, Yuri. I don't die easily." Hannah comforted, "I will be a good assistance to you later if it becomes inevitable."

Before anyone could speak, a cheery girly voice brought our attention to the side.

"CIEL~~!" Without any further warning, Elizabeth threw her arms around her cousin in loving gesture of affection and welcome. It was as if she never saw...the 18+ scene.

"I'm so happy you said yes to our invitation." Lizzy squealed, giving equally enthusiastic greetings to Alois.

"Elizabeth!" I could feel my back automatically straightening out at the familiar strict tone as Frances Midford, looking stern as always, calmly approached the noisy crowd, "Please do not display such indecent behaviour in public!"

Two Midford male followed behind their respective mother and wife, black and severe in her majesty, who obviously was the respected and feared alpha of the family despite the misogynistic era we were in. The great lady is seen whole in a gorgeous aerial portrait, black and severe in her majesty.

I recognised the two men immediately, one was Edward Midford — the eldest, absolute traditional son and Marquis Alexis Leon Midford — is a middle-aged man with cleft chin, thick eyebrows and a mustache upon the outer surface of his upper lip who dressed in sophisticated attires to signify his prominent status.

He was austere looking as well but I knew the man was warm hearted and kind (just like his daughter and son).

I stared as Edward face became hotly red when his eyes landed on me and greeted with a stutter. Pfft, how cute. I thought, I was probably the only girl (other than his sister) he somewhat knew. Edward Midford with crush? Ultra puppy cute.

"P-pleasure to meet you again, L-Lady Yuri!" Edward attempted feebly.

Then his face turned into a scowl and sneer, pointing accusingly, "I STILL HAVEN'T ACKNOWLEDGED YOU AS MY RIVAL OK?! SO GET OFF HER ALREADY!"

"What? Come on, brother! Why are you still saying that?!" Elizabeth sighed in disbelief. He may be her beloved brother but he could be too stubborn for his good.

But it wasn't Edward whom me and Ciel worried about. The breaking of engagement would have undoubtedly reached the Marquis ears and the heartbroken of his daughter as the person in question scrutinised Ciel with intensity.

"M...Marquis Midford, I have not seen you in a while." Ciel managed to say as he seemed to flash toward us in a way it reminded me of that horror film cliche where a light in a corridor goes out and the ghost that was standing in distance continue going out toward a scared woman every time the light goes out one by one.

"Um...I would like to introduce you to, Miss Yuri.." Ciel trailed off as the man's eyes widened in a way that struck fear(?) in our heart before the man hugged us in tight grip in affectionate gesture.

"Long time no see, my little nephew! You're cute as ever. I am very delighted to finally meet you, Miss Yuri! I have heard lot about you from my daughter! Oh my future daughter-in-law!"

D—daughter-in-law?

"W-what?" I choked out.

"DEAR!" Frances berated.

"Father that is not fair! I want to hug him too~"

"STOP IT YOU TWO!"

Alois sweat dropped as he watched the rather..unique family in front of him. Alexis Leon quickly schooled his expression and cleared his throat as he extended his hand to shake toward Alois.

"I am Marquis Alexis Leon Midford, please to make your acquaintance." Alois shook his hand firmly.

"I am Earl Alois Trancy."

"You know my nephew?" Alexis asked happily, it was good his little nephew had a friend in similar age as him.

"Ciel is an..." Alois started, staring at the Phantomhive Earl then me with cryptic gaze before saying, "Ein alter Freund mit ähnlichem Geschmack. (Old friend with similar tastes)"

I frowned, having not understood any of that while Alexis and others nodded in approval as they headed to the inside of the ship. That sounded German for sure..I think. Yea, I should have paid more attention to language lesson in school but then again, our school didn't taught us German. I did have a German friend that I said 'guten tag' to and that's about it. I missed my friends and family...

"All of London is talking." Elizabeth said with knowing smile as she hooked her arm with mine.

I shifted uncomfortably due to the tightness of the corset. It was crushing my ribs and believe me, I have large ribs due to unfortunate gene selection from my mother's side..they say Adam's ribs were taken out, but I'm the one who really needs them taken.

"About what?" I replied quickly, shaking myself out from the train of random thoughts.

"Where shall I start?" She teased, "Well first of all, you are a person of mystery who appeared out of blue all of a sudden into the spotlight then your 'shady' relationship with the two powerful Earls and thirdly, your visit to Her Majesty's palace."

"Let them talk." I said nonchalantly, "Rumour are always exaggerated."

Lizzy stopped in her track, pulling me back with 'Are you kidding me?' look.

"Yuri.." She spoke very slowly, to make me realise how important this was, "Her Majesty the Queen had allowed you to call her by her nickname."

"Yea, Drina." I said as Lizzy gasped.

"The nickname is preserved to those within her family. For one other than her family to be given such honour as that would obviously travel through all ladies of society." Lizzy revealed, "Did you not heard how Her Majesty described you to one of her attendants after you left?"

I shook my head no.

"She is reported to have said: 'Miss. Yuri was so handsome, so agreeable, so obliging in her manner, that I am quite in love with her. I can't tell you all the civil things she said, and really they deserve a better name, which is kindness embellished by politeness. Her character is by far is of strong and courageous character, honest, kind-hearted and full of love with such an extraordinary outburst of enthusiasm as I had hardly ever seen in London before; she possesses never before seen humour and had entertained me greatly that any other would be dull in comparison and I was immensely amused and roared with laughter. Even cynics like Earl Grey found their resistance worn down by Lady Yuri's unforced charm and directness. What surprises me greatly is her revolutionary independence which I encourage every women of our time to uphold and have, for women is damsel in distress no more in today modern age. Any woman who understands the problems of running a home will be nearer to understanding the problems of running a country. A man's got to do what a man's got to do. A woman must do what he can't. A woman with a voice is by definition a strong woman. But the search to find that voice can be remarkably difficult. However, I believe I have found such woman today. Even with such short meeting, I am passionately fond of her as one might be of one's daughter.' She is an ideal woman; I hope she will illumine and reform our contemporaries!"

How come rumours travel so fast when they don't even have feet? I thought but I was more amazed how a person could actually memorise all those sayings word by word because I sure can't even remember what I had for dinner last night. (Although anxiety might have something to do with it..)

"How did you managed such feat?"

"Um..well.."


-Flashback-

So this is what Windsor Castle really looked like in the inside. I thought as I looked around the room in wonder and awe. I admit I visited the castle but no tourists — except the Royal family and nobles — were ever allowed inside the castle so this was a honour for me.

A normal person should feel so nervous at this moment right? But for some reason, I was quite calm to the point of worry. Meeting perhaps one of the greatest Queen is pretty good reason to be nervous, isn't it? Do I really have to compliment the Queen? I'm sure she heard a lot throughout her life.

"Do you know what is the best ploy in human relations? There's just one, it's flattery. Flattery. Everyone likes flattery," Ciel advised, "And when you come to Royalty you should lay it on with a trowel."

I'd rather they act normally. I thought differently. Too much flattery would make Queen feel like some public meeting rather than a woman. Not to mention Ciel actually dared to have put me through excruciating manner and etiquette training just for this...

"Smell it first." The governess Hyatte said in elegant voice.

I did, scrunching my nose since I generally disliked tea.

"Ahem." She cleared her throat, obviously having seen my indiscriminate behaviour.

"Now, as if you're teasing, get it close to your lips."

Lifting up the fine china cup and the plate up to my face, "Like a butterfly sitting on a flower, put your lips on the cup. Then into your mouth."

My tongue touched the scorching liquid, "Hot, hot!" I dropped the cup as the governess skillfully caught the dropping cup with a long stick, balancing it on top.

"Just drink it." She deadpanned.

The governess, who was also Ciel's dance teacher, came to conclude this two were absolutely hopeless in the respective departments. No wonder even the famous Phantomhive butler gave up.

John Brown, personal butler and favourite of Queen Victoria, marched forward, "The Queen shall see you now."

I was led to the gigantic garden, beautiful and well-kept, where the Queen Victoria was waiting with delicious looking snacks and tea.

"John, will you please call for my Charles'?"

"Of course, Your Majesty." John bowed before going to fetch the two butlers.

"Please sit, my child."

I did, before putting five spoonful of sugar and whole small pot of milk much to the Queen's amusement.

"My, my, you truly are beautiful." She complimented.

"Of course, I was always this pretty. I am daughter of my parent, after all." I joked light-heartedly as Queen Victoria chuckled then with serious tone, "You don't have to please others all the time."

"It's what I've been brought up to do. Difficult lesson to unlearn. I need to be adored. That is my weakness."

"Then before we speak further," I added, "Excuse me if I don't say anything flattering or anything you are used to hearing." The Queen raised one of her aristocratic brow in amusement, "To others, another word for acknowledging is flattery; to me, acknowledging is to act like myself to those who deserve it." I said.

Queen Victoria's lip parted in surprise and hint of shock, but she also looked impressed and nodded. Then the Queen smiled, her eyes twinkling mischievously this time before starting with a, "I have heard a rumour."

"Yes?"

"That I will soon be addressing you as The Right Honourable, The Countess of Phantomhive."

I coughed, spilling the tea with indignity that would probably have made anyone around us (thank goodness the garden was empty) gasp and faint at my behaviour in front of the Queen. But this only made Queen Victoria roar with laughter in delight at such fresh outlook unlike the rigid and stiff mannerly she was accustomed to see at the court.

"Or is it The Right Honourable, The Countess of Trancy?" Queen Victoria grinned, glancing back at my shoulder as the two figure approached from distance.

"I won't get married." I revealed, surprising the two butlers/Earls' who had arrived in hearing distance at the moment to the Queen's calling. The two Earl would have viewed my opinion as comical and absurd for any lady to wilingly destined themselves to the life of spinster. 'Won't' is a definite statement different from 'Don't wish to' which is more of a 'I'm not prepared/realise the importance'.

Maybe it was my young age and my stubborn independence coupled with how I was brought up but right at this moment, marriage was the last thing on my mind. Who knows in ten years time, I'll change my mind.

Not to mention, I don't think me and Ciel or Alois is at that kind of stage where it's like when Adam and Eve first met, when he loved her to death. At least not there at least.

After-all, my mum did say (comically) people who says they won't get married are the first to be married off and those who says they will get marry young were the last one to go because marriage wasn't something you easily decided on. It was a life-time commitment that required deep thoughts after deep thoughts.

Also, because me, Alois and Ciel were inexperienced with love that we might hurt each other with the love we learnt from words and realise too late the effort and trial of married life.

"Pleasure to see you again, Lady Yuri." Charles Phipps bowed as I bowed back in equal respect. Grey only stared expectedly.

Queen Victoria chuckled, "Please excuse Grey, he's a little angry with you. However, the two wished to join when they knew our little rendezvous if you don't mind."

"Your Majesty..." Grey sighed, voicing out his distaste at having his feeling exposed.

"It's all right. I, too, dislike him." I said, thinking 'hate' is too much and rather extreme, "And I don't mind them being here. They say three's a crowd but four is a party. More the merrier."

There was a pregnant pause before Queen Victoria asked, "What an interesting proverb. But may I ask your dislike toward Grey? He's a very charming company and acquaintance to have; an useful ally."

I simply smiled and said, "I've always disliked the ones I started disliking from the start. Because the ones I dislike keep on doing things I dislike. I disliked him from the start. And he did something, which couldn't have been worse. I'm certain he'll continue to do things I dislike and I will continue to dislike him. Did you know he called me a whore when we first met?"

Victoria gasped, "Charles!"

"It's alright." I dismissed, "Isn't a whore, a woman with the morals of a man?"

"Oh, my my!" Queen let out a bemused laughter.

Grey frowned, slowly morphing into that of an anger before Queen Victoria stepped in to change the sensitive subject, "Back to the subject, you would lower yourself as a spinster?"

I simply smiled and said, "I prefer bachelorette instead of spinster; it's unfair how an unmarried man get to be called such glamorous name, bachelor, while women is called spinster."

The three occupants frowned, while certain person in question also frowned but in entirely different emotion.

"Bachelorette?" Queen Victoria repeated in confusion, "I believe I have never heard such terms."

I inwardly realised the word wasn't used till 1900 in America, "It's my creation. A feminine version of bachelor."

"Very ingenious." She complimented, "However, why do you not wish to get married?"

I thought for a moment, "Because I don't need a man, therefore, I can't be a lady. Woman do not marry just because they want to be with the man. Instead, they want to marry all the things connected with a wedding. Even though it's like a warm spring breeze when men first approach you, it turns into a cold winter wind as soon as you're married. The woman's expectant heart will only get hurt in the end."

"What do you think engagement rings are? Just proof that a man can pay for his bride." Queen Victoria let out a delighted laughter while the three men could not help but shift at my answer. In interest or awkwardness, who knows.

"Look, caveman would go steal a woman from a neighbouring clan. He'd tie her hands and her feet till she wouldn't run away. Once she'd stay put, he would only tie her finger, just to remind her. To people here, marriage is not romance. It's a contract with the state. It's an investment in their future."

Queen Victoria seemed intrigued at the information she had learnt.

"You would marry for love then.." Phipps interlaced gently. He greatly respect the ideology of this woman.

"But they say, if a man loves a woman, he opens his wallet for her." Queen Victoria added.

"A good house, beautiful jewels, coutures, will these things bring happiness?" I questioned, "To me, what they buy me doesn't matter. There's nothing that can move a person's heart better than sincerity. If you don't have it, then just live modestly without it."

Queen Victoria gave me one of her wrinkled smile, "There are many women who comes to love their husband. Will his compliment and love at first sight confession will do you?"

I couldn't help but laugh quite loud, one of the manner that wouldn't be acceptable in this era. The three men noticed this but for some strange reason, found it quite refreshing. After-all, she did not hide her lip behind her fan or masked them unlike all the ladies of the society they were used to. She was opening herself up to others. There was no hidden motive or agenda, but she was sincerely finding the Queen's question entertaining.

She did not even try to please the Queen in effort of materialistic favour.

"I don't fall for any compliments that a man gives me. Because it's all just their ploy to seduce us. If a man ever tells you he fell for you at first sight, punch him. It's just another way of saying he wants you in bed and stop wasting time."

This was when Queen Victoria roared with laughter, Phipps, Brown and even Grey who seemed to have forgotten all his anger toward the woman, could not help to smile and chuckle that crept up to their lip. Her chosen words was crude and they were used to hearing it in the company of other gentlemen but certainly not amongst ladies.

"Love isn't about making a deal, so there's no betrayal involved. Because you started liking somebody. Just because you force it, it doesn't make it 'love'. Love is beautiful only when it's genuine."

"Then any man will do you?" Grey sceptically asked.

"Just because you were born male, doesn't automatically make you a man. Becoming stronger from losing, yielding even though it is unfair, running away even though it's shameful, overcoming self confidence over time, that's how one becomes a real man. I don't want a man that's successful. I want a man that's going to be by my side. I want my man to be confident no matter."

I added, "If people were to be concerned only with money and materialism, this world wouldn't exist. While living our lives, there are times when we feel that this world is liveable. That's when we should be grateful. To those who chose love instead of money. To those who chose friendship over work. We have to be thankful to the people who sacrificed themselves for the better good. Because thanks to them, this earth has yet to be blown to smithereens."

"I must admit, Miss. Yuri," Started Queen Victoria, "I have never met a woman like you with such complicity."

But I countered, "I eat, sleep, cry, laugh, love, weigh and even hate. If something good happened yesterday, then I'd laugh yesterday, not today. I don't live a complicated life. I smile now because I'm happy now. That's the joy of small deviations."

"But in life, there are bound to have some complicity."

"Yes." I agreed, "But I can't just get angry when the world doesn't go my way. I don't like worrying for nothing or clinging to trivial things, it's not good for the health."

Every-time it's too troublesome I feel like dying, just for that day I just hang out with my friends, have a chat and throw it away. (And finish the whole Ben & Jerry ice cream.)

"Anyway, this world is rough and harsh on its own and blaming to death would only make me tired." I added, "We live in a world that doesn't have just one or two troubling issues; even children know that. What is so hard? I just have to eat well, sleep well and do well too, and then do well."

"I must admit your philosophy is something I rarely comes across." Queen Victoria mentioned and I knew it was

"Wealth and status means nothing to you?" Grey challenged knowingly. He had met many women who outwardly disregard prosperities and materialism. He would believe that when the pig fly and hell freeze over.

I sniffed and to his shock with unwavering eyes, "Are you serious? I love money. I'm greedy with money. There is nothing in the world that money can't do, only that... you may not have enough money. 'You can be happy without money?' I don't know about that. I want to be rich enough to realise that I can't buy happiness. In this world, there are two kinds of money. Money that you can see, and money that you cannot. Money that you can see is honest money. Money that you can't see is dirty money. There's no limit to earning money. To me, whether is it clean money or dirty money, it's all the same."

"But.." I said, "When things go well for a little bit, you get greedy. If you get greedy, you may die from wanting too much. The greater the power, the greater the potential for abuse."

Queen Victoria couldn't hide her smile, "And you believe owning them does not matter to you."

I nodded, "Just because I have money in my hands does not mean that it is mine. The owner of money is not the one who earns it, but it is the one who spends it."

The Queen made a pleasant hum that she was satisfied by my answer before challenging once more, "How do you feel about the recent economy? We have been charitable to the poor and less unfortunate yet they are still angry with us. They want an apology."

I knew the Victorian era was infamous for inequality and the living condition of the poor. Many had been evicted from their own home by rich landowners and factories builder.

"They fight, win and hear that we're sorry, do their life get any better? An apology? From whom? Who's responsible? The landowner? The rich? The construction company? The police? Why are they all so blind? I believe everyone in this country is responsible. Everyone who buys land and kicks out the poor. But they're no different. They'd buy land too if they had money. Why hide behind idealism? If they're angry, make money. Buy land."

For the first time, Queen Victoria's eyes slightly widened, "For a young person, you are awfully full of wisdom."

"I just know quite a lot about money." I said.

She chuckled, "For someone who have no care for money, you are more greedier than anyone I know."

"That's how I live and that's how I'll live." I said, "It's not something people like you would understand. How I used to be in the past wasn't something I'm proud of. I hid my true self in order to hear that I'm a good girl because while my family was not rich, we weren't poor either but it wasn't enough."

I sipped the tea roughly before starting to tell my tale, "There are some fairy tale characters I'm jealous of. Cinderella. She lived on easy street thanks to a prince. And Juliet. She had a man to love for life. Oh, and Snow White. Sleeping Beauty met a prince while sleeping. I told myself, 'Just wait, Park Yuri, you'll beat them all.' There's seems to be always a man behind a woman's happiness."

"I used to think, I'll just get a job then I'll get married into a wealthy family. Then I'll just quit my job right away then I'll live happily ever after. My dream was to become a wealthy homemaker. I would call that circumstance happy enough. During the time that other people are working to death, I wanted to do shopping in leisure. To us, obnoxious rich people were most annoying. While possessing everything and pretending to have lofty ideal. Honestly, we were anxious to live the worthless life of rich daughter-in-law like them."

Before anyone could ask I said, "Why? Because living is so tough. Studying in school so much you could die, coming out and when you finally get a job through multiple recommendations, you end up in serving sector job. In my generation, it was hard to get a proper job. We could scrimp and save but it still won't be able to afford even a single handbag. To me, luxurious handbag was the goal of my life. That was my objective. I'd also liked to live generously at heart. I'd also liked to not have to ever wet my hands and use money like water when I want, live in a nice house, wear nice clothes, carry nice handbags. That's how I'd wanted to live. I didn't wanted to live like my mum who has to hesitate before giving mere allowances to us."

"What made you change?"

"I grow up. I can blame other people, but it's impossible to transfer that misfortune to those people." I told, "In this world, nobody can choose her parents or be born the way she wants. The only thing that we can choose is just one thing — 'Today how I am going to live it ' — is the only thing. 'Never', there is no 'never' in this world. You can't be so certain about the future. I'm not afraid of the future that hasn't happened yet. What is future after all? Isn't it just what the moments right now turn into? No one can say for sure about life until the end of the road. Everyone does her best to live her own life."

"You sound very educated. Perhaps more than I expected." The Queen commented.

"I was on my way to apply for university." Before I came here, I silently added.

"They accept women?" She said, scandalous.

"Where I'm from, it's a free choice." Then I bent down to whisper in her ear much to the dismay and curiosity of the three butlers. After few minutes of explaining, I sat back down.

There was a choked gasp before she regarded me with scrutinising eyes as if mentally gathering what she knew and coming to a conclusion. Queen Victoria nodded in acknowledgement.

"Education to my family is very important so I came to know about many things." I explained.

"Well, in that case, they certainly prepared you above my expectation."

"In my country, being first is the only way not to get ignored. To not be stepped on, I had to step on them first. To not be hated by others, I had to hate them first. But they say hate is also a feeling of affection. Even now, the only thing I could trust definitely in this world is money and my source of food."

In Korea, students was pressured to be number one and lived a world in between dreams and reality where we were made into studying machines. Anyone who wanted to play and eat, make good money were viewed as crooked.

It was either the S.K.Y(1) or nothing. But will the parent be really happy? My parent was mild when it come to their expectation of me but it didn't meant they didn't conformed to the norm.

"We didn't have dreams, there was no time to rest." I sighed, "It was a cycle of school or home, everyone lived the same life. They classify us to either being number one or dropping out and trapped us in borders. There's no choice but to consent. Even if we think simply, it's the survival of the fittest but it was them who makes us step on even our close friends to climb up. Adults say that hardships are only momentary. To endure a little more, to do it later. The grown-ups confess that we have it so easy. They say that we are happier than our portion but I always asked, 'Then how do you explain my unhappiness?'. There was no conversation topics beside studying; we were trapped in someone else's dream."

I always did question myself if anything was worth it. Good grade, good school and universities. Outside, there were so many students like me who's grade was as good as mine; who's intelligence outshines mine. Grades can get good or get bad, so what? Results can go up or fall down, it was something that happens like sun coming up every morning. Sometime, it's good to take some rest because surely everything has its time.

Queen Victoria's face dropped sympathetically, "There are no words I could say to defend our ways; but as a mother, any mother would want best for their daughters."

"Tell me about your mother, Miss. Yuri." She asked, "I am very eager to hear about her person."

"When I was growing up, my mother never said 'I love you' to me, or to my brother. However, none of us ever doubted her depth of love. One day, when my school teacher made her annual home visit, she told my mother, 'Yuri is a good student but I want to know what kind of a person she is at home.' To this, my mother answered, 'She is reliable and trustworthy in all things at home and never causes any worry. I have great confidence in her as a person.' To this day, I try to behave well so as not to make a liar out of her even though she's somewhere far away. To me, that statement was equal to a million declarations of 'I love you.' That's who my mother is."

Queen Victoria looked as if I shocked the hell out of her. Maybe she expected my mum to be a typical Victorian mother or something.

Phipps and Grey looked at me cryptically. A hint of awe, respect and admiration (of course, only on Phipps side but little of those could be seen in Grey's as well.)

"Tell me more about yourself, Lady Yuri. I am very curious of your character more."

"Um.." I hummed thoughtfully. I played and eat, didn't come out of the house for months during school holiday (to the point my mum was begging me to go out and my friends got quite worried when they haven't heard from me since the last day of school before holiday), I lazed around, don't study much (and study a day before the exam).

"I love sport."

"A lady who loves sport.." Queen Victoria hummed pleasantly.

"Do you know why I like sports?" I asked, "Talents don't discriminate between rich and poor."

"That is true." She agreed, letting out a humourless laughter.

"I also did used to work before I came here." I added.

Queen Victoria gasped, "Worked?"

"Yes." I said, "For my mother's friend. She owned a clothing shop so I used to help her out during the weekends."

And for Ciel's company, I inwardly added, it was more of giving advices, designing the new products with inspiration I get from the modern time and some sort of taster as well, I guess.

Grey snorted, "Even so, despite your family being middle class, a so-called-lady still works."

I looked up at him, not angry but willing to elaborate, "How many people are there who do it because they like it? They do these things to feed themselves, to live and not to die. Living is just like that. Who are you to do the things you like or find funny?"

This instantly silenced the famous Earl as I told her.

"I don't want to make an easy money, live a joyful life on the men's money or live on the money of my parent. I don't need a man so I can live well without a man. I watched my mother growing up. I watched as she got a job, over the 25 years, rain or snow, I watched her endure and worked as hard as she could so I can't live without working."

"Truly?" Queen Victoria asked.

"Yes." I answered confidently, "Since when men have to feed us for our survival? I buy my own food, I buy my own clothes. It may not be enough but I know how to be satisfied, that is why I love myself. I don't want to spend my parent's allowance as my own; I'm too old for that. Isn't it a given to not be burdensome to them? That is why I am proud of myself."

"If you are married, your husband's property and wealth is rightfully yours'." Queen Victoria explained, "Marriage is about supporting each other."

I shook my head, "What a fairytale. If they aren't going to respect me, I don't care because the thing about women is.. the most common of woman can become a queen, and the rarefied woman can become a maid according to how she is treated by the person she loves. I think the moment you become dependent on your husband, you start to fight. I think if you don't depend on your husband, you'll fight less. Beside, all those materialistic things; it's not like you're going to take it when you die." I shrugged as Queen Victoria giggled, "If I have a life and a career, I can't throw away everything for a man. Why should a girl sacrifice for a man? Can a man give up their life for a girl?" I looked at the three men, all silent.

"If I love her, I can and I will." Phipps revealed confidently, leaving me with a surprise look.

I briefly smiled, "Any women will be lucky to have you. But I want to take care of myself. The other girls may have rich parents or a rich husband and live comfortably but I'm not interested in that. I had to wake up early every morning and I'm busy all day that I don't even time to eat a proper one meal."

Queen Victoria gasped as I continued, "But I do this because I like it. The money may be little but it's from my own sweat. My clothes, my food – I bought it all on my own. I bought them after putting money into savings, after giving allowance to my parents. If you trust men and play, what will you do when they leave you?"

Queen Victoria let out a bemused laughter, throwing her head back in amusement and amazement, "I am truly envious of you, Lady Yuri."

I grinned mischievously, "If you're jealous, you lose."

"Charles," The two Earls' in question stiffened at the familiarity I was using on them, "Not you, the other one."

"Yes?" Phipps inquired, sweat dropping as Grey fumed at being dismissed like some insignificant object.

"What time is it?"

"Two o'clock in the afternoon." He said, checking his elaborate silver pocket watch.

"I gotta go." I said with sadness, "It was nice meeting you."

The three butlers couldn't hide their surprise. It was an universal rules, one should not be dismissed unless the Queen dismisses them. The girl crossed the dangerous path.

However, the Queen was not at all insulted but amused once again at her bold yet respectful approach rather than carrying on the conversation with dull enthusiasm.

"Of course. Please, it was a pleasure in my account to see and get to know you." Victoria said, giving a warm embrace.

"John, please fetch Lady Yuri's carriage and Charles', escort Lady Yuri to the exit." Queen Victoria ordered, "I cannot accompany you to the door as I have other duties I must attend."

"I don't mind." I said, "Don't worry about it." I was also about to voice out my protest of being escorted but I might get lost in the huge castle so getting escorted seemed faster way to go back to home.

My eyes noticed the book beside the Queen's tea, recognising the title and the book cover, "On a stormy night? You're reading a good book."

"Do you know this book?" She asked, "My daughters have been urging me to read them for past months. They say it is a rather revolutionary story-lines."

"It's a well known author," I informed, "The wolf and sheep both like each other, it's a book about them being together."

Queen Victoria raised a brow, "How can a wolf and sheep be together?"

"I know right?" I agreed, "They're things that shouldn't be together yet they did anyway, so the one who liked more dies. The one who liked the other most was the wolf. Usually, someone who loves more is the weak one."

As I was walking away, Queen Victoria called me.

"Oh, and by the way, Lady Yuri." I glanced over my shoulder, "From now on, call me Drina(2)."

"OK, Drina." I said, waving goodbye, oblivious to the shocked expression of the two butler in front of me.

The Queen Victoria could not help but chuckle at the girl's naivety to the honour of calling her 'Drina'.


I yawned as I followed the two Charles to the door. So tired and hungry, I thought, as various images of delicious looking food appeared in my head.

Phipps opened the door for me to step out as I turned to say goodbye.

"Goodbye, Charles. It was nice seeing you."

"It was my pleasure." Phipps nodded before doing something that caught me off guard. He took my hand in his, brought it up to his lip for a brief chaste and let my arm fall back to my side once more.

"Grey." I motioned my head with quick chin thrust before turning around to head to my awaiting carriage. I yelp in surprise as something hard grabbed my arm and tugged me back that I was staggering toward Phipps.

"Grey.." Phipps sighed warningly.

"Someone needs to teach her some manners." He growled, "A mere commoner dare to ignore me?"

I rolled my eyes, be mature about this. Be mature about this.

Forcing a big smile on my face and turning around, I did something that shocked him and Phipps into a halt. I hugged him as if he was a friend I have not seen for a long time (an action deemed very very much inappropriate in Victorian time).

"It was so good to see you, Charles. Ever since the party at the manor, I just wanted to see you so much! Next time, we should meet again." I patted his back before squashing my 'happy' tone, "Satisfied, Mr. Earl?"

Grey shook himself from the shell shock at being touched by a woman so intimately before grabbing my arm again, "How dare you?!"

"Grey, stop this." Phipps intervened, trying to loosen his grip on my arm, "This is an utter inappropriate manner."

"Let go, Phipps." Grey shrugged his fellow Earl's hand and took a deep breath.

"Just who are you, huh?" Grey frowned, "How is it you act honest in front of others yet you single me out as the subject of your distaste. You do not know me."

"And you don't know me." I said, "If you think about it, isn't it simple who wronged who first? I said I dislike you. I'm too busy to have time to hate you. Go away — you play around and you'll get hurt. You'll be yelled at if you keep on doing this. Just go play somewhere else. Go play with the other cute kids."

I shook my head, prying open his fingers around my arm slowly before trying to walk away again only to be pulled back. My shoulders rose up and down as I try to meditate my breathing to normal, "You know what I'll tell you now so listen carefully."

"Listen what?" Before the Earl could say much further, I came out with it.

"Yeah, I've never been honest with you." I admitted, "Whose fault is that?"

"You are saying this is my fault?" Grey frowned as if he couldn't comprehend it.

"Ah what the fuck." Phipps and Grey gasped, "You wanna go there? I'm gonna talk informally from now on."

"Lady Yuri.." Phipps trailed off in shock.

"Did you just say..?" Grey found himself speechless.

"Yeah, I have a dirty mouth. Every-time, I open my mouth, only swear words comes out. Three bottles of vodka won't get me drunk and am I some baby's doll? I hate dresses like this. This is proper goosebumps. Damn it, it's because of jerks like you, girls have to play innocent so tiredly. It's so hard to live as a girl. You know! I don't know how they birth such precious old fogeys like you? You look down on commoners. How great do you have to be born so that you can stand above others and be more precious than all other people?! And so if you're rich, then you can mistreat other people? How can you rich people lack so much humanity and sincerity to another human being? How can they look down on people? Is commoners not a human being?! Whether a person is a commoner or a noble by birth, they're all the same people. Do you know what it means that they're all the same people? When you die, you and I all end up the same." I shouted.

He became silent, my words undoubtedly left Grey curious.

"By chance do you like drama?" I asked, this time more calmly but equally intimidating if not more.

Micro expression of pure confusion stole through Grey's face as I continued, "I'd like to tell you something from a drama I like called Gossip Girl. There is a very important line from there, 'I'm the crazy bitch in this town'." They gasped once again, "What you tried to do to me from the moment we met, I've already been doing that and been done that many times. Trying to mess with me for their benefits and reasons, there does not need to be more than one of them. Don't hurt me, who just recently opened my heart to others,"

Grey was startled by our close proximity I initiated as my fingers trailed the outline of his white uniform, "Quietly.. have some fun then get going..." Roughly slapping the long ribbon to his chest, "Huh?!" before stomping out of the castle into the carriage

"Mister, go quick!" I ordered, leaving the two Earls' standing there as if they were drenched in cold water.

-END OF FLASHBACK-


"That's what happened." Elizabeth's jaw dropped.

"Y-you didn't actually said that to Earl Grey..did you?" She stuttered unsurely, doubtful of her own words.

"Every words." I confirmed with dazzling smile.

"Why? It sounds as if Earl Grey likes you!"

"Being cocky won't work with me. I don't know about anywhere else, I may not be as well off as him but I overflow with confidence. If he isn't going to respect me, I don't care who he is."

"Earl Grey isn't going to like that.." Lizzy warned, "He's famous and very respected, you know that."

I tried to gather what I came to know about him. Yes, he was handsome but it was his personality that marred the physical aspect of him negatively. Grey was like those type of men whom you know it won't be 'serious' or anything like that. A playboy.

He was that kind of guy who slightly looks at you few times and poke at you for a reaction, thinking he could have a girl like some conquest. If that's how it's going to be, it was better for them to leave. Slowing hunting and quickly hooking, quickly rising and quickly getting annoyed, thinking of it too easily — that's not right. The love that I know isn't like that. Patiently waiting and patiently approaching and genuinely wanting, making a girl tremble— that is the right way.

"I'm not interested in his 'game', Lizzy." I replied, "I have other things making my head hurt besides him, I'm busy trying to do my own thing well, I don't have time to play around with a little kid like him."

Lizzy gave out a smile, "Some time, I think you came from a different world."

I couldn't help but grin at how right she was, "Like I always say, the thing about women is the most common of woman can become a queen, and the rarefied woman can become a maid. All depends on how she is treated by the man she loves. Come on, it's time for lunch." I said with a smile.

Food!


Campania stands silhouetted against a purple post-sunset sky. She is lit up like a floating palace, and her thousand portholes reflect in the calm harbor waters. The 150 foot tender Nomadic lies-to alongside, looking like a rowboat. The lights of a Cherbourg harbor complete the postcard image.

Entering the first class reception room from the tender are a number of prominent passengers. A broad-shouldered in an enormous feathered hat comes up the gangway, carrying a suitcase in each hand, a spindly porter running to catch up with her to take the bags. The entourage strolls toward the dining saloon where I was handed the luncheon menu and my eyes widened at the number of foods (even the ones I've never heard of) was written on 4 pages of paper:

LUNCHEON

Consomme Fermier
Cockie Leekie
Fillets of Brill
Egg a L'Argenteuil
Chicken a la Maryland
Corned Beef
Vegetables
Dumplings

FROM THE GRILL

Grilled Mutton Chops
Mashed, Fried & Baked Jacket Potatoes
Custard Pudding
Apple Merinque
Pastry

BUFFET

Salmon Mayonnaise
Potted Shrimps
Norwegian Anchovies
Soused Herrings
Plain & Smoked Sardines
Roast Beef
Round or Spiced Beef
Veal & Ham Pie
Virginia & Cumberland Ham
Bologna Sausage
Brawn
Galantine of Chicken
Corned Ox Tongue
Lettuce
Beetroot
Tomatoes

CHEESE

Cheshire
Stilton
Gorgonzola
Edam
Camembert
Roquefort
St. Ivel
Cheddar

-Iced draught Munich Lager 3d. & 6d. a Tankard.-

I put the menu down awkwardly, unable to decide what to eat.

"You are not going to eat?" Ciel whispered.

"Order anything for me." I whispered back.

Ciel placed the order for two Grilled Mutton Chops and something else I didn't catch.

"So you will be with us for the whole three weeks?" Marquis Midford asked.

"Yes. I hope you do not mind my intrusion." Alois replied apologetically but the head of Midford shook his head.

"No, no!" He rebuffed with roaring laughter, "More the merrier! Beside, I have heard many great stories of you, Trancy Earl, and I have always wished we could meet and chat. I am more happy Ciel has a friend of his age."

Ciel made something like an amused chuckle behind his throat as he sipped his wine.

"We have never been together for so long before!" Elizabeth giggled, "Escort me to the dinner party, okay Ciel? If it's alright with you Miss Yuri." She quickly added.

I shrugged carelessly, "Do whatever you want with him."

Ciel frowned but did not voice out the reason, "Okay, okay."

"Then it will be I who shall be escorting you then, Yuri." Alois smiled.

"Sure."

Edward growled, glaring at Alois, I was supposed to escort her!

"What the hell..." Ciel muttered distastefully at Edward's jealousness while Alois only chuckled understandingly.

"The meeting will be held on the night of the 19th." Sebastian whispered behind him, "How about taking a good rest occasionally?"

Ciel sighed, "Well..."

"We have everything planned and can get rid of the undeads tonight when others falls asleep; you shan't worry too much." The crow demon suggested.

"I guess it's okay occasionally.."


"Just watch, all of you men. I'll show you what a woman can do…I'll go across the country, I'll race to the Moon… I'll never look back." Edna Gardner Whyte


Preview of the next chapter:

"It is always a delight, when one is on holiday, to request a few words of wisdom. So without further ado it is a great honour to hand over to our most distinguished guest..." Sir James Hare, an attendee, paused for a dramatic effect, "When she appears, every eyes are upon her; when absent, she is the subject of universal conversation. And what we see her wearing tonight," An attendee at the soirée remarks to the crowd, "I look forward to seeing the rest of you wearing tomorrow! The empress of fashion herself, Lady Yuri."


Author notes:

*Sigh* the fanfiction won't let me add more than one punctuation ㅠㅠ no matter how much I love fanfic, there are some things that would be good to improve. And yes, I got my chapter title from Kara's new song, Damaged Lady :p

Oh by the way do you like the new book cover of Janus? Of course it will be temporary till the end of the zombie arc but check out the picture if you can and if you can't or missed it, just look at my profile under the name, 'Janus—Zombie arc cover'.

(1) S.K.Y - an acronym for the top three universities in Seoul; Seoul University, Korea University and Yonsei University.

(2) Drina - The name 'Drina' was the Queen Victoria's nickname while she was growing up which was used by her family. The Queen Victoria's full name was Princess Alexandrina Victoria (Victoria being the middle name and Alexandrina her first name.) Drina is the shorter version of Alexandrina. Because the nickname was only privy to Queen Victoria's family and closest friends, Yuri being given the right to call her by the nickname which is a very intimate use to address a Queen is a very high honour.