Opening Montage

Music: "Who Says You Can't Go Home" by Bon Jovi, featuring Jennifer Nettles

First shot is Quinn seated on a train. Jim takes the seat next to her and they start talking. Cut to a shot of Quinn and Jim's wedding five years later. Then cut to a hospital room a few years later and we see an exhausted Quinn and smiling Jim holding newborn triplets. Cut to present day and we see the now nine-year-old triplets. Teddy is reading a book while Tommy and Timmy fight over the video game controller. Cut to Teddy rolling his eyes disdainfully at his immature brothers. Next, cut to a shot of Jim working on a car while a tripod mounted camera records the whole thing. Next shot is Quinn making a S'mores 'n' Pores video in the kitchen. Next shot is Jim chatting with Jamie, Chuck and Kevin over beer while Brittany and Daryl make out in the background. Next shot is Jamie teaching a history class at Lawndale High. He notices that the current quarterback is making out with his cheerleader girlfriend in class, causing Jamie to have a DeMartino-style meltdown. Next, we see Teddy hanging out on the playground with a girl his age who is visibly of mixed European/East Asian heritage. They watch the 'normal' kids play with visibly disdain, implying that this girl is the Jane to Teddy's Daria. Next, we see Quinn, Jim and the triplets stand on the front lawn and smile at the audience. The following caption appears under them...

Lawndale

S. 2, Ep. 17

"The Angel Among Us"

written by

WildDogJJ

Lawndale Memorial Gardens, day...

Quinn, Sandi, Staci and Nicole were standing before a grave in the cemetary, each holding a bouquet of flowers with sad expressions on their faces. The four struggled not to cry as they looked at the headstone. The headstone read as follows...

Here Lies...

Tiffany Blum-Deckler

October 17, 1982 - April 30, 2022

Quinn was the first to lay her bouquet at the grave. After this, she stood up and wiped a stray tear.

"I...I still can't believe it's almost been a year since...since..."

"I know, Quinn," said Sandi as she lay her own bouquet on the grave, "I know." Sandi then turned her attention towards Tiffany's headstone. "I'm sorry."

Stacy lay her own bouquet on the grave before putting a comforting hand on Sandi's shoulder.

"It wasn't your fault, Sandi," said Stacy.

Nicole placed her bouquet on the grave before turning to her friends.

"Sandi," said Nicole, "That explosion was a freak accident."

"If I'd been there," said Sandi, "I could've stopped Tiffany from lighting a cigarette in front of a bunch of leaky propane tanks."

"I...I know," said Stacy as she felt a crying fit coming on.

For those who don't know, Tiffany spent the last few months of her life working as the manager at the gas and electric section of Wal Mart. She'd been careless with some propane tanks, which resulted in the stems on several of them spewing gas. Tiffany then made the mistake of lighting a cigarette in front of said tanks. Obviously, that was the end of Tiffany Blum-Deckler.

"I...I...," Stacy stammered, "I STILL CAN'T BELIEVE MY OLDEST FRIEND IS DEAD!" She proceeded to cry hysterically after this.

Quinn placed a hand on Stacy's shoulder. "It's okay, Stacy."

Sandi sighed. "At least her death wasn't the result of you being remiss in your duty."

Nicole raised a curious eyebrow. Since she and Tiffany were never more than casual acquaintances, Nicole was the one most able to keep it together. "Sandi, what do you mean by that?"

Sandi explained. "I...well, I always protected Tiffany. As you well know, she was a simple girl who was not very knowledgeable of the world. I developed an almost maternal desire to shield Tiffany from herself. While Stacy loved Tiffany as a sister, my feelings towards Tiffany were more maternal in nature." She sighed before continuing. "Because of that, I can't help feeling guilty about her death. Logically, I know that there's nothing I could've done, but it's hard for me to not blame myself for what happened."

Stacy fell to her knees and continued to sob uncontrollably. Quinn knelt next to Stacy in an attempt to comfort her, only to start crying herself. Sandi and Nicole proceeded to join them in the cry fest in short order.


Meanwhile, at the Thompson house...

A flashy, top-of-the-line Ford Mustang pulled up in front of the house and came to a stop. Out of the passenger side stepped eighteen-year-old Angie Thompson, Kevin and Brittany's daughter and a senior at Lawndale High. The car was being driven by her boyfriend, star quarterback Bryce Palermo.

"Thanks for the lift, bae," said Angie.

"No problem, Ang," said Bryce.

Angie closed the car door. As Bryce sped off, Angie made her way to the house. She stopped at the mailbox and opened it.

"Yes!"

There were four letters. One from Great Prairie, one from Middleton, one from Lawndale State and one from State U. Angie excitedly skipped into the house with the mail.

The kitchen, a short time later...

Excitement gave way to disappointment as Angie read the letter from Great Prairie.

"Miss Angela Thompson, Thank you for your interest in Great Prairie University. Unfortunately..."

She read the next part silently before putting the letter down and reading the one from Middleton.

"Thank you for applying to Middleton College. We regret to inform you, however..."

She dejectedly put the second rejection aside before reading the one from State U.

"Unfortunately, we don't think State University if a right fit for you at this time."

She finally read the one from Lawndale State.

"Unfortunately, you fall short of our standards of excellence in academia."

She then slumped her shoulders and sighed. Every college Angie applied to rejected her.


The Thompsons front porch, afternoon...

Jim, Kevin, Chuck, Jamie and Chris were hanging out on the porch drinking beer and talking.

"...so Quinn's been really down since she got back," said Jim, "Which makes sense. I mean, she did just visit Tiffany's grave."

"I know what you mean," said Chuck, "Stacy's been uncontrollably crying since she got home from the cemetary. Can't say I blame her. She and Tiffany went all the way back to preschool."

"Even Nicole's kinda morose today," added Jamie, "And she wasn't even all that tight with Tiffany."

"Guys," said Chris, "Did anyone see anything last night?"

"I saw Brittany stumble into the house around two in the morning," said Kevin, "But that was just because her afternoon workout with Daryl ran longer than expected. I can't believe how lucky I am. My babe loves me so much that she's willing to put in tweleve hour long workouts just to look hot for me. She was all sweaty and out of breath when she came home."

The other guys frowned.

"Don't you think that's kinda weird," asked Jim.

Kevin was dismissive. "Nah, she was working out. I know because her sweat smells just like Daryl's cologne."

All the other guys rolled their eyes. Kevin just doesn't get it.

Chris immediately moved things back on topic. "I meant has anyone seen a strange woman walking around. For the last few nights the station's been getting citizens reports of a strange woman walking the streets of this neighborhood. Since I live here, the chief wants me to ask around. The description is of a skinny East Asian woman with a purse. Then, last night, I was patrolling the main road in my squad car and saw a woman walking towards this neighorhood who matched the description. I got out to confront her, but by the time I'd gotten out of the car she was gone. I only took my eyes off her for a second, but it was suddenly like she'd never even been there."

"Now that you mention it," said Jim, "I heard a noise outside my bedroom window last night. I looked out the window and saw a woman walking across my yard who actually looked a lot like Tiffany. I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes, but when I looked again she was gone."

"Dude," said Kevin, "Tiffany's stalking this neighborhood!?"

Chuck rolled his eyes. "Kevin, Tiffany's been dead for almost a year. You should know. After all, you're the one who actually peaked into her coffin at the funeral."

"Maybe it's a ghost," said Jamie in a joking tone.

The other guys all laughed, believing this strange woman to merely be someone who looks like Tiffany. After all, people don't just come back from the dead and start haunting the part of town where all their old friends live.

Or do they? As this conversation went on, there was a mysterious figure watching from the shadows. The silhouette was of a skinny woman with a purse on her shoulder, though the shadow obscured any distinguishing features. This person was clearly eavesdropping.

Back on the porch, Kevin decided to switch topics. "You know, Angie's really bummed. She, like, heard back from all the colleges she applied to today. They all, like, rejected her."

"Probably because she spent too much time being popular and not enough studying," Jamie muttered under his breath.

Kevin hadn't heard that. "I tried to make her feel better. After all, she can just marry Bryce. That's what Brit and I did."

"Kevin," Chuck reminded him, "Brittany dropped out of Great Prairie and married you because you got her pregnant with the first of five kids."

Kevin scratched his head in thought. "Uhhh...Oh, yeah."

Everyone else sighed.


Meanwhile, in another part of town...

Angie was walking in a parking lot, constantly checking to make sure no one was following her. The reason was that she was approaching Cafe Risque, a strip club. There was a sign out front that said "Dancers Wanted, Inquire Within".

After taking one last look to make sure no one she knew was around, Angie quickly entered the strip club.

Inside Cafe Risque...

The club's owner, Jason Vorchevsky, who'd taken over after the retirement of his father, Ivan, was talking to the bartender. Jason was a handsome young man in his late twenties with dark brown hair who dressed in business casual attire. The bartender was a fat man with dark hair named George.

"Dammit, George," said Jason, "Why are you dumping out the ice?"

George explained. "Mr. Vorchevsky, when the ice melts it dilutes the drinks. No one wants watered-down scotch."

Jason rolled his eyes. "Hey, you don't have to see the monthly statements for this place. Do you have any idea how much it drives up the overhead when you waste ice?"

Angie approached the two.

"Excuse me."

"WHAT," Jason barked as he angrily turned around. He immediately calmed down when he saw the voluptuous blond eighteen-year-old. "Sorry, caught me at a bad moment. What brings you here?"

Angie explained. "I'm looking for a job and saw the sign out front."

Jason briefly looked Angie over. She was wearing stylish clothes that showed off her curves. "Let me see some ID, please."

Angie reached into her purse and handed her driver's license to Jason.

"So, you're eighteen," said Jason.

Angie nodded. "Yes, I'm a senior at Lawndale High."

"You have any dancing experience," he asked.

Angie nodded again. "I'm a varsity cheerleader and took ballet for five years when I was younger. I know, that's not the same thing as exotic dancing."

"The skill set in cheerleading and ballet easily translates to dancing in a place like this," Jason explained, "I only wanted to see some ID because you have to be eighteen or older to dance here."

Angie nodded in understanding.

Jason went on. "We're having try outs next week. Based on your appearance and skill set, I'd be more than happy to add you to the line up."

Angie smiled. "Thanks, Mr. Vorchevsky."


Ruttheimer House, late that night...

In the master bedroom Chuck was sleeping soundly while Stacy sat up in bed with a morose frown.

I can't believe it's almost been a year, Stacy thought, Almost a year since Tiffany died. I still can't believe that she's gone!

Stacy could suddenly feel another crying fit coming on.

Dammit, Stacy, pull it together! Tiffany's dead and I have to accept it! Waking up my whole family with another crying fit won't bring her back!

She then tried to force herself to think of something else. Anything to keep her from crying for her deceased friend for the hundredth time that day.

I need a drink!

Stacy got out of bed and left the room.

The dinning room, a short time later...

Stacy opened the liquor cabinet and proceeded to pour herself a scotch.

Maybe this will help me get some sleep tonight.

It was at this moment that Stacy heard a sound coming from the backyard. It sounded like someone walking on grass.

What was that!?

Stacy looked out the window. It was a clear night, so she could see that someone was walking around the backyard. She couldn't see any of the intruder's features, but someone was definitely out there. In response, Stacy ran to the kitchen.

The kitchen, a few seconds later...

Stacy took a butcher knife out of one of the drawers in order to defende herself. She then made her way to the back door in order to confront the intruder. She turned on the outside light by the back door before quickly opening it. The intruder was standing right there, just outside of the light. Stacy spoke in the most intimidating tone she could muster.

"WHO THE HELL ARE YOU, AND WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING ON MY PROPERTY!?"

The intruder said nothing but stepped into the light. Stacy gasped in shock and dropped the knife when she saw who it was.

"NO! How...it...it can't be!"

A slim, attractive Asian woman in a tight, sky-blue dress with a green prada purse slung over her purse smiled at Stacy and spoke.

"Heyyyy, Staaaacyyyy."

Yes, it's...

"TIFFANY," Stacy blurted out in total shock, "Wh...How...You're supposed to be dead!"

Smiling, Tiffany turned her back to Stacy. The latter gasped in shock upon seeing the beautiful white dove wings growing out of her friend's back. Tiffany then turned back around and smiled.

"I'mmm annn angellll nowww."

Stacy fainted from the shock.


Act II

Ruttheimer house, nighttime...

Stacy was passed out at the back door while Tiffany stood over her. The reason for Stacy's shock was the fact that not only is Tiffany supposed to be dead but also that Tiffany now has a pair of white-feathered wings growing out of her back.

"Ummmm, Stacyyy, aree yoou oookaayyy?"

Stacy regained consciousness and began to stand up. She rubbed her head.

"Ow...What happened?"

Tiffany spoke again. "Youuu faiiinteddd."

Stacy gasped in shock.

"No! Y...This is a dream! That's it! Just a very intense dream!"

"Staacy," said Tiffany, "I'mmm reeaall. I'mmm an annngel nowww."

Stacy willed herself not to freak out again.

"Okay, if you're Tiffany, then tell me something only the real Tiffany would know."

Tiffany did just that. "In firrst graade you peeed yourr paants annd I puut waater on myy paants sooo youu wouuldn't feel embaarraassed."

Stacy gasped. Neither she nor Tiffany had ever told anyone about that. Stacy's shocked expression quickly morphed into a huge smile.

"Oh, Tiffany!"

Stacy threw her arms around Tiffany and hugged her.

"I missed you so much!"

Tiffany returned the hug.

"Iii missed youu tooooo."

Music: "Life in a Northern Town" by The Dream Academy

Stacy and Tiffany continued to hug as they skipped happily.

The Salvation Army band played

Stacy and Tiffany entered the house.

And the children drank lemonade.

Stacy and Tiffany drank tea in the kitchen.

And the morning lasted all day.

All day.

Stacy and Tiffany were in the living room reminiscing as they watched old home movies of themselves on TV.

And through an open window came.

Adult Stacy and Angel Tiffany had a laugh as they watched Quinn's famous pore freakout.

Like Sinatra in a younger day.

Stacy and Tiffany were now going through old issues of Waif Magazine, just like when they were teens.

Pushing the town away

Ohhhh

Stacy and Tiffany were now in the backyard frolicing together like back when they were children.

Ah hay ma ma mommy doo-din-nie-ya

The woman and the angel smiled contentedly, as if no time had passed since they were childhood friends.

Ah hey ma ma ma heeyyyyy-yyyyaaaahhhhhhhhhh

Life in a northern town.

It went on like this all night. It was almost sunrise by the time it ended.

"Staaacy," said Tiffany, "I haave too go nowww."

Stacy was sad.

"Can't you stay?"

Tiffany shook her head.

"I caan't."

Stacy was about to cry when Tiffany put a reassuring hand on her shoulder.

"Staacy, you'll see meee aagaain. Iiii proommise."

Stacy was relieved to hear that.


Casa Carbone, morning...

Quinn, Jim and the triplets were having breakfast with a visiting Stacy. Stacy was visibly excited.

"You're in a really chipper mood, Stacy," Quinn pointed out.

Stacy had a huge smile on her face as she began to explain.

"I had a religious experience last night!"

Both Jim and Quinn drew the wrong conclusion.

"Stacy," exclaimed Jim.

Pointing to the triplets, Quinn said "Oy-bays too oung-yay!"

Stacy stifled a giggle. "Not THAT kind of religious experience!"

Quinn and Jim were visibly relieved while Tommy and Timmy were confused.

"Teddy," said Timmy, "What's going on?"

Teddy sighed. "Mom and Dad thought Mrs. Ruttheimer was talking about sex."

"TEDDY," Jim barked, "Language!"

Teddy sighed. What is it about parenthood that makes people born in the eighties act like it's the fifties?

Stacy then dropped the bomb. "Tiffany visited me last night!"

Quinn gasped in shock, Timmy's eyes went wide, Tommy choked on a piece of bacon, Teddy rolled his eyes and Jim spilled his coffee.

"WHAT," exclaimed the entire Carbone family in unison.

"Tiffany's back," said Stacy, "She's an angel now!"

Teddy couldn't resist the urge to make a deadpan remark.

"Mrs. Ruttheimer, have you been eating my grandfather's kitchen sink stew? That's been known to cause hallucinations."

"Um, Stacy," said Jim, "I really don't think Tiffany's come back as an angel. That just doesn't happen."

Added Quinn, "You probably just had a really vivid dream. I mean, we did visit her grave yesterday."

"If it was a dream," said Stacy, "Then so's this conversation. I haven't slept. I'm too excited."

"Yep," Teddy quipped, "Definitely a hallucination."

"Teddy," said Timmy, "How can you say that? Angels are real."

Tommy added his two cents. "Says the one of us who still believes in Santa Claus."

Teddy was impressed. "Well, stranger things have happened, like Tommy being smart enough to make a deadpan remark just now."

"BOYS," Quinn barked before turning her attention back to Stacy. "Stacy, I really don't think Tiffany's back as an angel."

Added Jim, "She's right. Dead people don't come back as celestial beings."

"Tiffany did," Stacy insisted, "And I'm surprised. I figured at least Quinn would believe me. After all, she had that guardian angel phase back in high school."

Quinn blushed with embarrassment.

Stacy stood up. "Look, if you guys don't believe me, that's fine, but I know what I saw last night." With that, she got up and left. Once Stacy was gone, the others drew their own conclusions.

"I think the grief's driving her crazy," said Jim.

"Definitely," said Tommy.

"I guess," said Timmy.

"No question," said Teddy.

Quinn said nothing but sat there looking thoughtful.


Thompson house, a short time later...

Angie was in her room setting up a stripper pole that she'd secretly bought and snuck in so that she could practice for the upcoming audition and Cafe Risque. Once the pole was set up, she admired her handiwork.

Perfect!

Angie then untied the bathrobe she was wearing and let it fall to the floor. Underneath, she was wearing a skimpy black string bikini and go-go boots. She then walked over to the floor length mirror to check herself out.

D-cup boobs: check! Firm, flat stomach: check! Hourglass figure: check! Bottom so skimpy in front that one can easily tell that I shave down there: check! Perfect legs: check!

She then turned around to check her rear. The bikini bottom was a thong.

Perfect ass: check! I'm ready.

Angie then walked over to her computer, hooked up her I-Pod, and picked a song.

Music: "Anaconda" by Nicki Minaj

My anaconda don't...

My anaconda don't...

As the racy song played, Angie sensually made her way to the pole. She suggestively shook her ass to the music the whole time. Angie then proceeded to work the pole like a pro. She erotically swung around, grinding the pole in time with the music. At one point, Angie even licked the pole in a manner that would drive any man wild with desire.

Meanwhile, in the hallway...

Kevin was making his way towards Angie's room.

Angie's room...

Angie slid down the pole in a perfectly erotic manner. She then rubbed her bare ass on the pole in a sensual manner. She was beginning to undo the stirng bikini when..

"Yo, Ang," said Kevin as he entered his daughter's room without knocking, "Have you seen my.." He saw what his daughter was doing. "...GAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! WHAT THE HELL!?"

Angie stopped stripping and looked to see her father standing there.

"EEP!"


The Thompson's porch, the next day...

Jim, Chuck, Jamie and Kevin were drinking beer and hanging out. Kevin was ranting about what he saw the previous day.

"...so I, like, told Angie she's grounded! No daughter of mine's gonna be a stripper!"

The other three were in no mood.

"Kevin," said Jim, "Right now we have bigger things to worry about than your daughter making a really bad career decision."

Added Chuck, "Stacy's convinced that she saw Tiffany the other night. That's got me worried."

"But, like," said Kevin, "My daughter didn't get into a college with a good cheerleading program and now she wants to be a stripper! I gotta do something, man! I won't stand for that kind of filth in my own house!" Something then caught Kevin's attention. "Hey, Daryl."

"Hey, Kevin," said Brittany's personal trainer/adulterous lover as he made his way to the door. "Don't come up for the next three hours or so. You know how Brittany doesn't like to be disturbed during our workout sessions."

"Okay," said Kevin, "Work her hard."

Daryl had a sly grin. "Oh, I will." He then made his way into the house.

Kevin turned to the other guys. "What a nice guy. I mean, he actually comes here to help my wife exercise."

The other guys all frowned as they know what Brittany and Daryl are really going to do while he's here.

"Hey," said Kevin, "So, Stacy, like, really saw Tiffany's ghost the other night!?"

Jamie rolled his eyes. "Kevin, it was just a dream!"

Added Chuck, "I'm worried that my wife's convinced it's real."

"You're worried," said Jim, "My wife's the one who probably gonna have to find a way to snap Stacy out of this."

"Dude," said Kevin, "Tiffany's back! My daughter wants to be a stripper! I just, like, figured out what's going on!"

The other guys looked at Kevin questioningly.

"THERE'S A PORTAL TO HELL IN MY HOUSE!"

Cue the collective face palm.


Meanwhile, in the Carbone's backyard...

Quinn, Nicole and Sandi were in bikini's sunbathing by the pool.

"Guys," said Quinn, "I'm worried about Stacy."

Nicole sighed. "This is about Tiffany being an angel, isn't it?"

Quinn was surprised. "You know about that!?"

Nicole shrugged. "Not much happens in Lawndale. When someone comes back from the dead, believe me, it gets around."

"Well," said Quinn, "Obviously, Stacy's not thinking straight. I mean, dead people don't just come back as angels."

Sandi was equally skeptical. "Even if they did, why visit only Stacy and not the rest of us? After all, I'm much more in touch with the divine than Stacy is."

Both Quinn and Nicole rolled their eyes, as Sandi is clearly on another ego trip.

"What makes you say that," asked Quinn.

"Yeah," Nicole added, "You never really struck me as the spiritual type."

"Oh, really," said Sandi, "One time I was at the beauty salon. While my hair was drying, I could've sworn I heard a voice say 'Jesus is love'. Explain that."

Both Quinn and Nicole had 'yeah,right' expressions.

Casa Carbone, a few hours later...

Quinn was in the master bathroom holding a blow dryer to her ear at full blast. Jim walked by. Upon seeing what his wife was doing, he rolled his eyes.

"Oh, God," said Jim, "Sandi told you that 'Jesus is Love' story again, didn't she?"

Quinn suddenly turned off the hair dryer, but remained unaware that her husband was behind her.

"Ohmygod! I heard it again!"


Sloane mansion, nighttime...

Tom and Sandi were both asleep in the master bedroom when the intercom by the bed started beeping. This woke them both up.

"S..yawn...Sandi, cud you...yawn...ans'r that?"

As Tom went back to sleep, Sandi rubbed the sleep out of her eyes before pressing the talk button.

"This had better be good!"

A male voice came over the speaker.

"Mrs. Sloane, the silent alarm was tripped. We have a trespasser!"

Sandi was right to the point. "Release the hounds!"

"That's another problem," said the voice on the intercom, "They won't go out of their pens. In fact, it's almost like they're scared." There was a brief pause. "And I'm not seeing anything on the surveilance cameras. It's almost like the intruder's a ghost."

Sandi rolled her eyes. "The system must be malfunctioning. Get maintenance on it first thing in the morning."

"Yes, Mrs. Sloane."

After this, Sandi let out a frustrated sigh. Damn false alarms!

Suddenly, the bedroom door opened. This did not improve Sandi's disposition.

"Shane," she hissed, "How many times have your father and I told you to knock first."

She gasped upon seeing the intruder wasn't her and Tom's son.

"Heeeyyy, Saannndeeeee," said Tiffany as she stood in the doorway.

Sandi just sat there in wide-eyed, open-mouthed shock.


Act III

Sloane mansion, night...

Sandi was in total shock as standing right there in the doorway to her bedroom was her deceased friend Tiffany.

"H...How?"

"I'm annn angelllll," said Tiffany, "Aaa guarrdiann anngelll."

Sandi turned to her sleeping husband and tried to wake him.

"Tom! Tom, wake up!"

"Heee woon't waake uuup," said Tiffany, "I'm usinggg myy poowerrs too keep him aasleep."

Sandi stopped trying to wake Tom. "Why?"

"Weee need too taalk," explained Tiffany, "Saanndee, myy death waasn't yourr faault."

"I should've been there," said Sandi.

"Youu couldn't bee there," said Tiffany, "Iii screwed uup. I'm thee onee whoo liit a cigarrette in fronnt of proopaanne tannks. It's myy ownn faault I'mmm deaad."

Sandi stood up and approached her friend. She reached out an touched Tiffany's face.

"Oh...my...God! Y...You're really here!"

Sandi smiled. Tears of joy streamed down her face as she pulled Tiffany into a hug.

"Tiffany! I missed you so much!"

Tiffany returned the hug. Soon the embrace ended.

"Iiii haave too go noww," said Tiffany, "Buut, you'll see mee aagaain."

"C...Can't you stay just a little longer?"

"Iiii caan't tooniight," said Tiffany, "Jeesus annd Mohaammedd arre throwwingg a paarty forr Buddhaaa. It's gonna bee awwessoomee."

Sandi smiled. It was the same old Tiffany. "Far be it for me to keep a friend from a party."

"Doon't woorryy," said Tiffany, "Wee caan caatch uup laterrr."

With that, Tiffany faded with a smile on her face.

Sandi just stood there, smiling contentedly.


Casa Carbone, the next day...

Jim was in the home office paying some bills when Quinn entered. Jim looked up from his paperwork.

"Hey, Quinn," said Jim, "How was your girl's afternoon out?"

"Jim," said Quinn, "Tiffany really is back!"

Jim's eyes went wide. "WHAT!?"

Quinn proceeded to explain. "Sandi told us that Tiffany visited her last night. I mean, I didn't believe Stacy but the same thing happening to Sandi? That can't be a coincidence."

Jim rolled his eyes. "Quinn, Stacy had a vivid dream and now Sandi's had the same dream. Nothing more."

"Jim," said Quinn, "Too many things are happening for it to just be a coincidence. Remember when you thought you saw Tiffany in the front yard last week?"

"Quinn," said Jim, "I was sleepy when I saw that. It was just a figment of my imagination."

"How can you be so sure," asked Quinn, "I admit, it seemed stupid at first, but what if this is real?"

Jim groaned in frustration. "Like I don't have enough craziness to deal with!? You know, Kevin thinks Tiffany opened a portal to Hell in his house. Last thing I need is you thinking Tiffany's come back as some divine being."

Quinn rolled her eyes. "Jim, why is this so hard for you to accept?"

"Because I live in the real world," said Jim, "And dead people don't come back as divine, mythical beings in the real world."

Quinn had her own take. "Look, Jim, now that I've accepted the possibility that Tiffany's still here and watching over us I've actually felt more at ease than I have in the longest time. Stacy's finally over her grief. Sandi's finally let go of the guilt she feels over what happened to Tiffany. If we choose to believe that Tiffany's back then what's the harm?"

"The harm," said Jim, "Is in the expectation that some divine being is going to take care of all our problems. Don't get me wrong, I believe there's more out there than we know but I also believe that the same force that created the universe has better things to do than solve all of our petty problems. God helps those who help themselves."

"And believing in angels flies in the face of that belief," said Quinn, "That's why you're so skeptical, I think."

Jim said nothing but looked thoughtful.


Thompson's porch, the next day...

Jim, Kevin, Tom, Chuck and Jamie were hanging out drinking beer. Jim was telling them what happened.

"...so now even Quinn believes in this thing."

"Dude," said Kevin, "Angie's auditioning at Cafe Risque tomorrow!"

"I thought you grounded her," said Chuck.

"I did," said Kevin, "But then I caught her praying to Tiffany in her room. I lifted the grounding so Tiffany won't drag me to Hell."

Jim rolled his eyes. "Kevin, there is no portal to Hell in your house."

"Actually," said Jamie, "Tiffany visited me last night. She had a message. She said all the enemy combatants I killed in both Afghanistan and Iraq had all forgiven me, that God understands that I was just a soldier doing his duty. This morning, Nicole actually prayed to Tiffany to thank her for helping me finally slay the last of my inner demons."

"Chuck," said Jim, "Could you please smack some sense into him?"

"Jim," said Chuck, "I'm not going to incur the wrath of Tiffany."

Jim was shocked. "Y...You're serious!?"

Chuck nodded.

Jim turned to Tom. "Are we the only rational adults left in town?"

"Actually," said Tom, "With everything that's happened lately I'm inclined to believe."

Jim rolled his eyes. "Oh, God, Tom! You too!?"

"Jim," said Tom, "I admit it sounds far fetched, but too many things have happened for it to be just coincidence. I believe in Ockham's Razor: the simplest explanation is probably the right one. The simplest explanation is Tiffany coming back as an angel."

"I have a simpler explanation," said Jim, "Stacy had a dream so vivid that she thought it was real, Sandi had a similar dream and now everyone's falling for the power of suggestion. Even if angels are real, they don't make their presence known."

"Dude, don't say that," said Kevin, "You'll be dragged into the portal to Hell!"

Jim emitted a frustrated groan. "Kevin, if there is a portal to Hell, then it's in my garage, next to where I keep my tools. Think about that the next time you wanna borrow my stuff without asking first."

Kevin panicked. "AAAAAAHHHHHHH! I'M GONNA GO TO HELL FOR SWIPING THAT BELT SANDER!"

Jim buried his face in his hands out of frustration.


The next day...

A pink Corvette Stingray was driving down the road. Inside, Angie Thompson was at the steering wheel as it's her car, a Sweet Sixteen present from her grandfather, Steve Taylor. Angie was on her way to audition to be a stripper at Cafe Risque. Suddenly...

"Annngieee."

Angie looked over to find Tiffany sitting in the passenger seat.

"Tiffany!? You...You answered my prayer!"

"Nooooo," said Tiffany, "I diiidn't."

Angie was confused. "But...Dad lifted the grounding and let me go to this audition."

"Aaactually," said Tiffany, "Yourrr fatherr thiinks he'll go toooo Hellll ifff hee doesnn't let youu dooo thisss. I haad noothingg tooo dooo withhh iitt."

"Then," asked Angie, "Why are you here?"

Tiffany explained. "I haave aaa messaage fromm Jeesusss. Heee saaidd noott too dooo thee auuditionn. Youuu arren't goingg tooo maake theee cuuutt."

Angie's eyes went wide. "What!?"

Tiffany reiterated. "Jeesusss saaid youuu'll failll theee auuditionnnn."

"But," said Angie, "I didn't get into any of the colleges I applied to."

"Beecaausee yourr cheerrleadinng daays arre overrr," said Tiffany, "Youuu haave too aacceptt iiittt."

Angie wanted to cry. "How can you say that!?"

"Jeesuss saaid iiiittt," said Tiffany, "Noottt meeee."

"You don't understand," Angie protested, "If I can't be a cheerleader, then stripping's my only option."

"Jeesuss saaid youuu're meannt forr soommeething elseee," said Tiffany, "Buut heee wouuldnn't sayy whaat."

Angie was angry. "Dammit, Tiffany, if you.."

"LOOOKKKK OUUUTTTTTT!"

Angie turned her attention back to the road and saw that she was now driving into oncoming traffic.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

Panicked, Angie turned to wheel hard to avoid a head-on collision with an SUV. Unfortunately, she did crash into a street post. The air bag deployed as the car came to a violent stop. As the airbag began to deflate Angie took several deep breaths to calm herself down. She briefly looked over to find that Tiffany was no longer there. Angie then nervously stepped out of the car.

As Angie looked around, a young woman approached. This woman was black and accompanied by two friends, a brunette and a blond. All three appeared to be around Angie's age.

"Hey, miss," said the black girl with concern in her voice, "You okay?"

"I...I..," Angie took a few breaths to calm herself down, "I'm fine, thanks."

Angie then looked at herself in the car's rearview mirror. Upon seeing that her hair was messed up and she had bruises and smeared makeup, Angie freaked.

"Ahhhhhhhh! I LOOK TERRIBLE!"

"So," said the blond.

Added the brunette, "Nobody looks their best after a car accident."

"It's no big deal," said the black girl.

"You don't understand," said Angie, "If I don't look my best, I'll fail!"

Angie's lack of context led the other girls to draw their own conclusion.

"You have a test with Professor Myers, don't you," said the blond, "Figures!"

"God," said the brunette, "That guy's such a creeper!"

It was at this point that Angie noticed where she was. She was right by the campus of Lawndale Community College.

"Wait," said Angie, "You...You think I'm a student here?"

"Well," said the black girl, "Aren't you?"

"No," said Angie, "I'm a senior at Lawndale high. I was gonna go to college, but they all rejected me."

The brunette had a suggestion. "Why don't you come here next year? All you need to get in is be a New Jersey resident with a high school diploma."

Added the blond, "We can show you around. Also, you can transfer your credits to any state school later on."

Angie didn't know that was even an option. She began to think. I don't have to be a stripper after all! She suddenly smiled. Thanks, Tiffany.


The Thompson's back yard, a few evenings later...

The Thompsons were hosting a cookout and had invited everyone they knew. Quinn, Stacy and Sandi were by a refreshment table. Quinn was explaining the reason for the party.

"...so Angie didn't go through with the audition after all. After graduation, she's enrolling in community college."

"Thank God," said Sandi, "As a former stripper myself, I can say it's not an ideal career. Not only will you be out of a job, but it's quite humiliating. The money's good, but it's still pretty degrading to dance naked while horny drunks throw money at you."

A fourth person joined them.

"Sheee goottt thee messaageee."

Quinn, Stacy and Sandi all gasped in shock when they saw who it was.

"T...Tiffany," said Quinn.

"Heyyy, Quinn," said Tiffany.

Quinn turned to Stacy. "I'm sorry I didn't believe you at first." She then turned towards Tiffany. "Oh, Tiffany!" Quinn pulled her into a hug. "I've missed you so much!"

As the hug ended Stacy noticed something. "What happened to your wings?"

"I'mmm tryyyying nott too drawww too muuch aattentionnnn," said Tiffany.

"I see you've remembered my lessions in fashion," said a proud Sandi, "Dove wings at a party are sooo obnoxious...unless, of course, it's a costume party."

Tiffany stifled a giggle. "I toold youu you'dd see mee aagainnn."

Stacy suddenly looked worried. "Will we see you again after tonight?" She nervously feared the answer.

"Ooofff courrsee," said Tiffany, "I'mmm aaa guarrdiann anngelll. I need tooo check innn regularlyyy."

The former Fashion Club then entered a group hug, glad to be a foursome once more.

Later that evening...

Music: "Life in a Northern Town" by The Dream Academy

The party was over and most of the guests had left. The former Fashion Club, including Tiffany, exited onto the sidewalk.

"It was great to see you again, Tiffany," said Stacy.

"Ittt waas greeat too see youuu guyys too," Tiffany replied.

"Tiffany," said Quinn, "Feel free to come back to Earth for a visit anytime you want."

"Iiii willll," said Tiffany.

The four shared one last hug. After this, Tiffany said "Goooddd niighttt."

The angel then walked down the street. Quinn, Sandi and Stacy all watched in amazement as Tiffany's wings reappeared. At the same time, Tiffany reached into her purse, took out her halo, dusted it off and placed it above her head. Rather than fly, Tiffany continued to walk until she was out of sight.

Ah hay ma ma mommy doo-din-nie-ya

Ah hey ma ma ma heeyyyyy-yyyyaaaahhhhhhhhhh

Life in a northern town.


Epilogue...

Chris Carbone was in his living room on his knees with his hands folded in prayer.

"Tiffany, I need a woman. Please, give me a woman, any woman! I'm so lonely! I don't ask for much!"

He waited a few seconds, but nothing happened.

"Please! WHY ARE YOU HELPING EVERYONE ELSE, BUT NOT ME!"

He then sank into a crying fit.

Yes, Chris is such a loser that even Heaven won't cut him a break.

End Chapter.