BPOV

Oh my God. Oh my Freaking God. Would someone please tell me this is not happening? Because I absolutely, definitely should not be sneaking up to Mike Newton's house in the middle of the night with a grinning Edward beside me.

"This is ridiculous!" I whispered furiously "What is wrong with you Cullens? Why can't revenge be simple and normal with you, huh? We could just TP his house and be done with it!"

"Well, Emmett's creativity is a little out of control" Edward admitted "But it'll be fun! And besides, that creep owes us"

"I just don't see the point" I huffed. Edward shushed me and pulled my mask over my head tightly.

"From now on, we are burglars, OK?" He asked. I nodded and climbed on his back. Then, he ran around the house and jumped up into Mike's bedroom window.

This brings back lots of memories… I thought with a shudder as Edward walked over to the bed.

"You know, I like it better when it's you I'm looking at asleep in a bed, not Newton" He whispered. I stifled a giggle with my gloved hand.

Edward put his finger to his lips and started tying Mike's hands and feet together with a length of rope, waking him up.

"Wha-"

"Another sound and you die" Edward threatened darkly, his grin hidden by the sock with two holes he wore proudly on his face. Mike shut up, terrified. I slipped a blindfold over his head and giggled.

"Did you leave the ransom note?" Edward asked, saying his lines carefully and convincingly.

"Here it is" I answered, taking a note out of my pocket and leaving it on Mike's pillow. He couldn't tell, but what it actually said was that he was leaving with Eric and Tyler for two days. In Mike's handwriting.

"Good" He told me. Then he nodded towards Mike "Hope your parents got two million dollars handy, or it's a date with death for you, Golden Boy"

Mike shuddered and a tear slid down his cheek. Another one followed, and another one, and more after those, until he was a wet and miserable mess being carried in Edward's arms. I jumped into his back and held on tight as he ran towards the forest.


JPOV

Alice giggled as we ran to Eric's house. Edward told us he had been involved with the phone call after all- as had Tyler- and we decided the three boys must pay on equal terms.

My wife and I were dressed as kidnappers. She had a mask on her head, as did I. When we got to the house, we drew to a stop. All the lights were on.

"I'll go in first" I whispered, feeling as excited as I had during my first day as a soldier in the Civil War.

I had lost, but this time- with Alice on my side- I would succeed.

With a small thump, I landed on Eric's window. He was playing a perverted and sick videogame on his computer. He was a soldier, and he ravaged towns and raped the women. Just like the Nazis.

I took out a fake gun and pointed it at him. He turned.

"If you make a sound," I threatened "Make sure you're ready to meet your Maker beforehand, child"

Alice landed beside me, smiling.

"Where shall I leave the note?" She asked, glancing around.

"There" I answered, gesturing towards the bed. I blindfolded Eric "Your parents better have lots of cash ready for us, kid"

The creep started stuttering and shaking and bawling, all at the same time. I was disgusted. Did he not know how to be a man? To be a coward- and in the presence of a lady- was revolting. Enough to make me gag.

"Hush, young one" Alice whispered dramatically, slapping him hard. "You shall not be harmed"

"Yet" I corrected, jumping out the window and rushing into the black night.

"Yet" My wife agreed as we passed the edge of the huge Forks forest.

We both laughed evilly, mocking Eric all the way to unconsciousness.


RPOV

"Cat woman, I repeat, Cat woman, please, answer. Over" Emmett whispered into his Walkie-Talkie. I groaned.

"Cat woman here, Sexy boy. I repeat, Cat woman here. Over" I replied unenthusiastically.

"Aw, come on, Rose!" Emmett whined, slinging his arm around my shoulders. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing" I answered "Your idea is great, really. I just wish we could cut the crap and kill Tyler already"

Emmett kissed my forehead.

"Ok, then. Up we go!" He grabbed me and suddenly we were flying, up, and up, and…

WHAM! Emmett's large frame shook the window. He set me down gently as we peeked inside Tyler's room.

The freak was watching a video! A home-made porn video.

"A word will get you killed" I said slowly, pointing a gun at the little pervert's head. God, I wished I could just pull, but Emmett needed me, and I wouldn't fail him.

"Hands behind your head!" Emmett snapped. Tyler paled and obeyed immediately.

"The ransom note" I reminded him. My husband nodded and placed the note gently on the bed. He turned off the TV, grabbed the DVD and smashed it in half. I smiled at him gratefully.

"He looks rich" I commented. Emmett nodded and slipped a blindfold over Tyler's head.

"Let's just home he's got enough cash to please us" He muttered. I laughed happily.

"Oh, he better" I threatened subtly.

"Let's go" Emmet ordered. I jumped out the window and heard him fall softly behind me. We started running, and in a few minutes I felt the city fade from view and the forest slowly appear.


EPOV

We all got to the clearing at the exact same time. I checked my watch- it was midnight.

"Perfect!" Alice giggled.

"The trees, brother" I reminded him subtly. He put Tyler down and tore the area of a small circle of trees bare except for a huge oak in the middle.

"Blindfolds off" Rose ordered. "This'll be a night they'll never forget"

"They won't" Alice assured her.

"Stop crying!" Bella snapped at Mike. "It's ridiculous, and extremely annoying"

"You should be glad she told us to take off your blindfolds instead of your heads" Jasper commented lightly.

We all laughed evilly.

The blindfolds had come off, and our hostages saw the forest surrounding them darkly.

"Who are you?" Eric whimpered

"Please, don't hurt me; please, don't hurt me" Mike begged. Bella reached for him "No! Don't touch me, please"

She drew her hand back and laughed at the sobbing teen. God, it was all so pathetic.

"Stop fooling around and tie them, guys" Rose recited perfectly. In truth, she wanted us to do anything but.

"Oh, we will" Emmett answered "We just wanna have a little fun first"

At that, the boys started crying, shrieking and twisting, all at the same time. They all got slapped, too.

"Do your parents have two million dollars?" I asked them bluntly. They shook their heads.

"Such a waste" Alice said regretfully.

"Alright then, honey" Rose drawled. "We'll have fun"

"Just tie them, dude" Jasper ordered. Emmett shrugged and complied quickly, tying the creeps to the tree trunk in the middle silently.

"And the fun begins" Bella purred. Oh, God, she was taking her role way too seriously.

Alice took out a brand-new cell phone and placed it a couple of feet away from them, just out of their reach.

"You may call someone" She said "If you can"

"If you can't, we'll just leave you here" Rose shrugged.

The boys tried. They really did. But it was impossible, and after ten minutes, Emmett got bored.

"Too bad" He said "Guess we gotta go now"

As we were turning around to blend into the shadows, Tyler snapped.

"Who are you?" He yelled desperately "Dammit, who are you?"

We were going to be caught, in the end. Alice had seen it, and so I decided to have a little fun.

I whirled around to face him and took off my mask.

"We're the Cullens"