A/N Thank you to all the readers, reviewers, favourites and followers. I'm really sorry about Saturday when I uploaded and then deleted. I really wasn't happy with it and it was far too long. I've cut it down, but it is still really long and I'm still not happy with it! As it turns out, deleting it was the right thing to do as in fact I accidently loaded chapter 34 again! Therefore it would have been even more confusing. I was slightly distracted, my husband had the Eurovision on in the background, so I'm blaming that for the mistake. By the way, I love Belgium's entry!

Writing about the 40s has had a bit of an influence on me. I'm going to a wedding this weekend and all females have been requested to wear a hat or fascinator. I was really drawn to a 1940s fascinator and will actually look quite girly, considering I'm a ripped jeans and Adidas gazelle kind of person. Anyway...

ljvs - Thank you for your review. I'm glad you liked the outcome. Edie is evil, just how evil, we'll have to wait and find out ; ) thank you also for pointing me in the right direction of the help desk when there was that new chapter email issue.

AudreyK- Thank you for your review. I'm glad you like the extras. I'm building up to the new ending, so hopefully Ron's involvement is a positive one!

LolaJGreen - Thank you for your review and you're welcome. Glad you liked the chapter. Edie's plan starts off quite slow and tame I think... Fin has an explanation for not knowing about her pregnancy, we'll get to that bit eventually. I have Taylor's letter all planned out, can you guess what it says?!

augustah - Thank you for your review. Glad you liked the chapter. Edie is just warming up I'm afraid!

Der Mond ist aufgegangen is a German children's song.

Ok, sorry for the long A/N!

Hope you enjoy.

...

"Come on lads! Stop dallying!" Cara shouted as she jumped out of one of the jeeps her and the Easy lads had taken to the hospital to see Shifty.

Cara ran ahead first and entered the building, she felt guilty for not seeing Shifty straight away, but there was no way she would have missed her goddaughter being born. She had tried to enquire after, but the brute of a matron wouldn't allow visitors outside of visiting times. Cara ran down the corridor with the lads hot on her heels, they all arrived together. The ward Shifty was on was full. The Allies had started to ship back POWs and they were in a state of poor health indeed. Cara could see he was the third bed down on the left.

"Er...excuse me! It's only three visitors allowed to one bed at one time!" a voice hollered as they walked past the nurse's station.

"Woah! That's far too many numbers in one sentence nurse! We're only cannon fodder, don't mistake us for the Air Force now!" Fin called back receiving sniggers from the lads.

Shifty looked up to see the commotion his fellow troopers were causing as they took over most of the ward. The other patients seemed pleased, there did seem to be few other visitors.

Shifty smiled at the site of them all. They were all there apart from the officers, except Fin of course, but she still saw herself as one of the NCO's. "Hey Shifty!" Fin smiled as she sat down in the chair next to his bed as the rest of the men surrounded him, Perconte and Liebgott perched on the end of his bed. "Whiskey!" Fin announced as she slipped the bottle behind his pillows "For when you get bored!" she winked, leaning over and giving Shifty a kiss on the cheek.

"Just couldn't go home could ya!"Luz began to joke "You had to go attention seeking didn't ya!"

Shifty grinned shaking his head "Trust me, I can think of better ways of attracting attention!" he said in his all familiar gentle tone. Fin suddenly feeling sad at how much she had missed his voice.

"Pass me the clipboard" Fin asked as Perconte obliged lifting it off the end of the bed.

Fin flipped through Shifty's notes "Internal bleeding! Bloody hell Shifty, I'm so glad you're ok!" she exclaimed horrified at the seriousness of the injuries he had received in the truck accident.

"Internal bleeding? Well what's wrong with that? Blood is supposed to be internal!" Malarkey quipped as the men groaned and shoved him around a bit.

Shifty laughed before coughing and holding his ribs in discomfort. "No more jokes lads!" Fin called out seeing that he also had a couple of broken ribs.

"Well only shit ones!" Luz replied

"You just crack em' then!" Christenson teased Luz.

Shifty laughed again, this time groaning at the pain.

Fin turned to the lads and pointed her finger at them all in turn. "Hey Fin last time you pointed your finger like that at us, you were dripping wet in a tiny towel being escorted by Sparky!" Malarkey laughed as the other men joined in.

"Ahh, I regret the day I wasn't in your hut!" Shifty replied missing out on the prank.

"Speaking of Sparky!" Luz began "Him and Fin are only getting married!"

Shifty turned his head slowly to a smiling Fin "Really?" he asked sad but surprisingly not as devastated as he thought he would be.

Fin nodded.

"We all reacted the same Shifty, it was a week of mourning across the whole battalion!" Luz joked receiving a soft slap on the leg from Fin, a little too close to his crotch.

"Careful there Fin, nearly got my nuts!"

"I didn't nearly get them, I missed!" Fin laughed.

Disapprovingly of the nurses, but unchallenged with no matron in sight, they managed to stay with Shifty for a good few hours. The men filled him in on their exploits and plans for when they got home, unfortunately making Shifty a little sad that he wouldn't be returning with them. Fin was desperate to tell him there was a chance she might not be heading to America with them either, it would all depend on when she gave birth, but she couldn't tell him about her pregnancy before Ron. In a way she thought it would be nice to sail to America with Shifty so that he wasn't on his own, but she also desperately wanted to set foot in America as a family with Ron and the baby.

As they all started to say their good-byes, Shifty held onto Fin's arm as she was the last to leave. She sat back down. "Everything ok? I can pop back tomorrow?" she asked concerned with the sadness in his face.

"I missed out" he said.

"Missed out on what Shifty?"

"You"

"I don't understand?"

"I have more than a soft spot for ya Fin" Shifty finally admitted.

"Oh Shifty!" Fin sighed "You'll always have a special place in my heart, we have a bond"

"I know, I'm glad you're happy and I think he'll look after you or you look after him!" Shifty managed a small joke.

"I just got too close to you lads, there was no chance for romance"

"Yeah, we became too much like brothers to you, didn't we?"

"That's right, but I have no doubt that you will find someone you truly love, you're such a gentleman" Fin complimented.

"Thank you" Shifty smiled pleased that his admission didn't ruin any friendship they had "If they let me out for a few hours, can I come to the wedding?"

"Of course without question! I want all my Easy lads there!" Talking about the wedding brought back Fin's anxiety but she managed to smile through and hide it from Shifty.

"Hey Fin! Come on we're waiting!" Tab called from the ward entrance. Fin waved at Tab and then leaned over to Shifty and placed a peck on his lips. "I'll see you tomorrow!" Fin said as she waved good bye to him.

Shifty watched as Fin left with Tab. He would have liked to have married her, but he always wondered deep down if he would have been the right man for her. He liked the quiet life and he wasn't sure that would have been right for Fin. They had their marksmanship skills in common, but if he was being honest, that's all they had. Was Speirs a better match for her? He was unpredictable and took risks and she was the same. He had a temper and from what Tab said when he left Fin after she was shot it sounded like she could have one too. Speirs didn't get close to her like they did either, he had been able to romance her without being her friend. Come to think of it, he was always popping up in places where Fin was before he joined Easy. Maybe the man had fallen for her way before he had. He would be talking to the men though, one of them would have to have 'the talk' with Speirs. Fin no longer had brothers or a father, therefore one of them, her new brothers would need to lay down the ground rules to Speirs if he wanted to marry their sister. Shifty grinned, that would be a funny conversation or scary one depending on how Speirs took it!

...

Fin stepped back out into the bright sunshine, suddenly regretting her jacket, but the beauty of being British is that you knew how to dress for all weather, layers. Fin removed the first layer and felt instantly cooler in her shirt.

"Hey Fin can I borrow ya?"

Later that afternoon, Cara missed her lunch date with Ron, she sent a message with Luz to deliver to him and hoped that he would understand. Cara spent her lunch watching the kind and gentle Eugene Roe marry his sweetheart Vera. Cara had no idea he had someone until he revealed it in Bastogne and that they had tried to marry on June 6th 1944 having no idea that he wouldn't make that date. Now she watched him marry this petite, angelic looking girl, she had the look of her Aunt Clemmie, a natural kindness with no bad bone in her body. Cara envied her, she was full of bad bones, evil bones really, she had not felt one single regret after killing Nazis, although Cara thought she must feel something for her kills because she would tell herself they weren't Germans who were conscripted. Her kills were all cruel, death loving Nazis, a probable lie she had told herself so many times now, that consciously she believed it.

Cara dropped the newlyweds off at their B&B and drove back to the cottage her and Ron had been billeted with. This was the last day they would spend together before Ron moved in with Nix that evening, Ron insisted this time that they spent a few days apart before the wedding. Cara had without reluctance agreed, it would make hiding her bump easier and give her uninterrupted time to expand the skirt waist band on her no.1s for the wedding day. Eve had been terribly upset that neither of them had brought the dress Eve wore to marry Nix back with them for Cara to wear, but they had given it to Antonia for her wedding to Chuck Grant and simply failed to ask for it. Cara didn't mind, Britain would still be under rationing for a while yet and plenty of service women had married in their uniforms and made the day no less special. Ron didn't know, she was sure he wouldn't be happy with this, he'd rather her in a potato sack than her uniform.

Cara drove down the country lane on the edge of the village and pulled up outside the cottage. She smiled as she looked over day dreaming that one day they may own a little house, maybe both of them out of the military, a little house in America, or even England, who knew where life would take them. Cara jumped out of the jeep, placing the keys into her pocket.

"Cara"

Cara looked round to see the handsome figure of Freddie standing before her in the blue of his RAF uniform.

"Freddie?" Cara questioned a little shocked to see him.

"Can we talk?" he asked as he moved some small stones around beneath his shoes, his hands fumbling around in his pockets, his peaked cap tipped to one side.

"What now?" Cara glanced at the cottage, Ron hadn't come to the door, he obviously hadn't heard the jeep.

"Come for a drive, we won't be long, I'll deliver you back to your yank in good time" Freddie said with a little hint of jealousy in his tone "For old time's sake"

Cara looked back at the cottage, still no Ron. She looked at Freddie who was nervously kicking the small stones with his shoes now. It wouldn't hurt to get some closure maybe? Cara thought, they never had spoken about what happened properly, always brushing over it. It might help her anxiety about the packed church she'd be facing in a few days. "Whose driving?" Cara asked as she walked away from the cottage and towards Freddie.

Freddie sped down the winding roads making Cara a little apprehensive as to how far they were driving away from Aldbourne. She was feeling guilty, this was cutting into the time she had left with Ron before he would swap places with Eve.

Freddie slowed and pulled his Aston Martin off the road and into a secluded lay by. "Fancy a walk?" he asked getting out without waiting for a reply.

Cara followed him "What is this about?" she asked lengthening her strides to catch him as he walked quickly up a small hill.

"I don't really know Cara, just heard about your…well, I wanted to see you" he called back, berating himself over the whole mess he had never tried to fix.

Cara broke into a little jog and caught up beside him "This is a bit selfish of you Freddie, your timing is rotten, but then you always did have a problem with time keeping"

Freddie stopped and looked ahead at the view. Cara followed suit, Freddie always was good at finding beautiful spots Cara quickly silently scolded herself, so was Ron, with the meadow he took her to on their first date and where he proposed to her. Cara began to get angry, Freddie was clouding her mind.

"I know, I live with the regret every day" Freddie replied still looking ahead, he didn't want to look at Cara, he knew they'd be anger there and all he wanted to see was a little love for him in her eyes.

"Why did you do it?"

"I'm sorry Cara, like I said after Berlin, we got caught up in our jobs and... well I didn't want to leave a war widow" he lied. He turned to face her now, just as he thought, she was angry.

"Well you could have broken up with me long before I got to the church!" Cara raised her voice, the anger growing more now that he had decided days before her marriage to Ron to turn up and say sorry for causing her that awful pain. "Look how things turned out, we both made it"

"Do you remember the day we first met?" Freddie smiled at her.

"Don't change the subject Freddie, I'm not here to reminisce!" Cara knew full well what he was up to, she wasn't letting him off lightly, she needed closure off him and she wanted it quickly.

Ignoring the stunning blonde he let slip through his fingers, Freddie carried on "I do, we were both so young, neither of us had seen much action at that point, well I hadn't, you had a bit more under your belt!" Freddie chuckled "You delivered that repaired Lancaster to us after the ATA pilot had fallen ill. I'll never forget the fuss you caused as you climbed out, the ground crew boarding the aircraft because they couldn't believe you were the pilot and the only one on board. You sauntered across that airfield like you were in charge of the place shaking your long blonde hair loose "Brewing up lads?" you said!" Freddie remembered her sweet voice as if it was yesterday. "I fell in love with you instantly."

Cara sighed, they were fine memories, but this wasn't doing either of them any good. "That love didn't last long though, did it?"

It was tearing Freddie apart, he had a secret. He wanted to tell Cara, but he knew now that it was too late and wouldn't change anything except cause her more pain and he'd inflicted enough of that on her already. "You're better off with him"

"I know"

"I thought you had forgiven me?"

"I had, after Berlin I realised I had, but that wasn't a few days before my wedding! Bloody hell Freddie, I'm shit scared to walk in that church because of you!" Cara revealed the extent of the damage Freddie had done to her "I thought I could never love or trust another man again!"

"I'm so sorry Cara, I really am, if I could have done things..."

"Don't Freddie, please just don't!"

"Do you still care for me Cara?"

"I'm in love with Ron"

Freddie screwed his face up "I can't stand to hear you say that with someone else's name!" Freddie snapped.

"You did this Freddie! Not me, I waited for you...You did this!" Cara scolded, she wasn't going to let him leave her with any kind of guilt on the matter.

Freddie sighed, how could he be angry at her, she had fallen in love with someone else and it was his own fault, he may have been prevented from getting to that church, but he was still partially to blame "Can we part on good terms please Cara, I'm sorry, I can never tell you enough how sorry I am!" Freddie pleaded, it's all he could do now, he had waited too long to talk to her properly and now it was too late, he could only try to salvage forgiveness and friendship from her.

Cara had loved him so much that she could feel a little of that heartache still. She had often wondered to herself over time that if Freddie ever came back to her could she have forgiven him? Back then, before Ron, she thinks she would have done. He was her charming, brave pilot. He had known pretty much everything about her from the beginning; he had been supportive, promising her the world and a future of happiness and adventure. Cara shook her head, there would be no regrets and marrying Ron was the right thing to do. She loved Ron and carrying his baby made no difference, her love for Freddie had disappeared and replaced with the true love she had for Ron. She turned back to Freddie. He looked sorry, he looked sad, for an unemotional man, he actually looked regretful. Cara did care for him, how could she not? But she didn't love him and now she knew that whatever love she had felt for him it wasn't anything compared to how she felt for Ron. "Yes we can Freddie, I do care for you and I want you to be happy, I hope you will be soon" she said sweetly, genuinely wanting that for him.

"I'd hold you but I wouldn't let you go"

Cara dropped her head into her hands and a little pang of sadness hit her stomach, I'd hold you but I wouldn't let you go he said those words on purpose, he knew she'd remember the first time he said that to her. Cara paused, she thought about stepping closer to him but a little flutter in her stomach replaced the sadness reminding her of the life time of happiness waiting for her. Cara felt anger again, how dare he say those words and what exactly did he hope for? "You have no right Freddie, are you trying to mess with my head because it's not working!"

"I still love you always have done!" Freddie blurted out, he hadn't wanted to, he knew it was her turn to break his heart now. "I know there's a place in your heart for me! You wouldn't be here now otherwise!"

"Oh Freddie" Fin sighed reaching out her hand and squeezing his gently. Why did she feel pity for him. She shouldn't not after what he did to her, but it was because she knew that crushing, suffocating feeling of unrequited love. The panic of not being loved back by the one who was your world. When Ron rejected her after Foy, she couldn't breathe, she couldn't function. If it wasn't for Doc and the lads, she wouldn't have coped at all. Now she was the one rejecting someone's love and it felt terrible. "Freddie, we weren't meant to be, we can't change the past, but we can both move on from it"

"I'm sorry Cara, I know I did a dastardly thing, I'll never forgive myself for letting you go"

"You will because I have" Cara would make this as easy on him as possible, no more anger.

"I don't want you to forgive me!"

"Why ever not?" Cara looked at his sad eyes, perplexed as he moved his fingers under his cap and rubbed his head.

"Because it means you're free of me, if I can't conjure up intense feelings inside of you, even one of hate, then there is no hope for me and you"

Freddie cursed himself, why didn't he tell her that he didn't choose to abandon her? Because that's all the family she has and he didn't fight for her, he didn't try to win her back. If he was being honest with himself, he didn't think she'd make it through the war; she took risks and stupid ones at that. He also didn't expect her to find someone else. She wasn't that sort of girl, her job was her love and she liked the danger of it. When he saw her in the POW camp, she acted like it was just a walk in the park, how she had treated the whole war as far he knew. His beloved was confident, cocky and brave. He thought about talking to her back then, but she was focused and a novelty to the men at her blasé entrance. "I'm not staying lads, just a flying visit!" she had giggled at her own joke to the imprisoned airmen. He'd had his chance, he could have tried to woo her back, but he didn't and now he'd lost out. She was in love with the Yank and no matter the revelation, she'd still be marrying him.

"Freddie" Cara let his hand drop and placed her arms around his neck, she held him tightly and he held her back "There is someone out there for you, it wasn't me. I know you think I am, but I'm not" Cara sighed, she was about to speak words she didn't really believe, but her job now was to make sure Freddie would be ok, she didn't want him to feel the full extent of lost love "Not marrying me was the right thing to do, what you're feeling right now is guilt. I forgive you and I want you to be happy. We share wonderful memories and I'll always treasure the time we had together"

Freddie rubbed his face into her hair; she always was so kind, always putting someone else first no matter how they treated her. If this Yank ever messed up, he'd be there that was for certain. "How can you be so understanding?" he mumbled as he closed his eyes and pretended the war was still on and they were in the early days of their courtship. "You're in love with someone else and I can't win you back!"

"You did this Freddie, but there is no point punishing yourself for it any longer. Time is a healer, I know, you'll heal too"

Freddie smiled and reluctantly ended their embrace. He turned and took her hand "Come on, I need to get you back, I've heard about your fellas reputation!" They walked in silence back to his car, Freddie still battling his conscience. I didn't do this. He cursed the day he let her Uncle persuade him not to show up, but it would be a secret he would keep, he didn't want her to dismiss the little family she had left. Freddie thought back, forcing the lump down his throat as he did so.

The morning of their hush, hush wedding, with Cara unaware that the ceremony was a secret. He was on his way down that fateful country lane to take Cara for his wife, when the British Prime Minister finally found him and ordered him not to marry his niece. Cara was not to be a wife, she was not to get pregnant, she was to have no distractions and in order to achieve all three, Freddie was ordered to break her heart. He reluctantly did so and took the blame, making Cara think all this time that he had just got cold feet and put his job first . They had bumped into each other a few times over the years until he flew her to Berlin. Her friendliness then told him she had moved on even though he still tried to talk to her after the mission. He unwillingly broke her heart and now it belonged to someone else, the American timing his relationship just right with her. How he wished he could turn back time. He had never put the fault on her Uncle entirely, he should have fought for her, he walked away too easily.

As he drove her back to another man, they glanced at each other, sharing a smile and remembering happier times. I'll never forget you Cara Rebecca Churchill

As soon as she walked through the door she was in Ron's arms. "Only a few hours left now" he said gently. Cara buried her face into his chest, she felt guilt as if she had cheated on him. "I love you"

"I love you too baby"

"I witnessed Doc marry Vera" Cara said, intentionally avoiding telling Ron about Freddie.

"That's nice, our turn next" Ron breathed in his fiancé, running his fingers up and down her back feeling her body quiver at his touch.

"It was so small and intimate, I wonder if we should do the same?"

Ron leaned back and brought a hand round, he gently stroked her chin with his thumb "What's the matter?"

"Nothing, I just thought it would be nice, no fuss" Cara lied, clearing the air with Freddie did nothing for her anxiety, if anything it made her feel worse. The girl who enjoyed making an entrance, the girl who danced on tables, the girl who sang on stages, the girl who would walk into a room full of Nazis and not batter an eyelid, the girl who ran into gun fire, who faced down a tank, who fought in hand to hand combat was shit scared of walking into that church. Rejection that's what she was afraid of. Freddie rejected her and Ron rejected her in Foy, what if he did it again? She didn't want him to know about the baby yet, she had her special moment planned, but what if he was having second thoughts? Only the baby could secure him to her, but she didn't want to trick him into marriage like Edie had done. Cara fought back the tears, after everything she had been through in this war, it was her love for a man that would break her.

"Can you do small and intimate Easy company style?!" Ron asked trying to lift her mood.

Cara nodded her head in his chest.

He knew she had gone with the RAF pilot, he had watched her from the window. He saw her look at the cottage a couple of times and then walk towards the other man. He didn't know what it was about, he assumed it was the old boyfriend the one who abandoned her. He'd hunt that man down if he had any influence over Cara at all. If that man as much as put a slight doubt in Cara's mind, he would be spending time in prison after he had finished with him. The more Ron thought about Cara with the other man, the more he wound himself up. He didn't realise that he had tightened his hold on her and that she was trying to wriggle a little more space. Without thinking he grabbed her hand and pulled her upstairs despite her protest that Eve would be arriving soon.

Ron spun her into the bedroom, immediately going for her clothes. He looked at her, she seemed excited and a little shocked. He wasn't excited, he was angry, not at her, partly at her. She shouldn't have gone with the pilot, she shouldn't have spoken to him. He should have gone out and not stared at them from the window.

Cara struggled to keep her shirt on, Ron's hands were everywhere. She didn't want him to see the bump. He gripped both her hands with one of his and swiftly removed her shirt, once the shirt was gone he released her. Cara looked at his eyes, they were darting all over her body, he wasn't taking anything in, Cara sighed in relief, but equally started to worry that something might be wrong.

Ron crouched down pulled off her trousers and then dragged her knickers down, he pushed her further up the bed and climbed on, he undid his shirt buttons and his pants, slightly undressing himself and leaving Cara exposed, he pulled his trousers down just enough to bear down hard. He momentarily regretted the roughness of his action as she arched her back in response. She had closed her eyes, he watched as her body shivered, he was completely ravished by her beauty. Closing his eyes too, he moved to the euphoric sounds of her moaning his name.

...

Edie sat across the table from her Uncle as he sang Der Mond ist aufgegangen to his great nephew. There was a buzz in the village, another wedding would be happening soon and she knew whose it was. She'd discussed her plan with Uncle Hugo in the car as soon as he'd picked her and Charles up from the hospital. It was all she could think of and needed to get things in motion. Uncle Hugo thought her plan was too much of an open threat and would be taken as so. It didn't matter, Uncle Hugo was plan B, if Ron failed to take her seriously, then he would suffer the consequences more than whatever pain Uncle Hugo could inflict on Cara Finney. The whore was indeed facing a whole new world of agony and torment if Ron didn't do as he was told. Plan A was the quick way for Edie to get what she wanted and for the three of them to leave Britain quietly, Plan B would be a lot more risky and they had argued over the strategy. Uncle Hugo wanted it done quickly, Edie wanted to make the whore suffer slowly, like her heart had suffered, she want to prolong the pain. She literally wanted her heart to break.

...

"Cara! There's a parcel for you!" Eve called wearily from the front door of the cottage. Ron and Eve had swapped places and they had stayed up talking into the early hours "I'll leave it on the kitchen table, I'm just going to feed Rebecca"

"Thank you!" Cara called as she skipped down the stairs and entered the kitchen, feeling a lot more spritely than she really should. The parcel was quite large, wrapped in brown paper tied with string. Cara carefully unwrapped it, she was excited, she had literally never received a parcel before.

Cara felt like it was a game, after several layers of brown paper, she got to some white tissue. Eventually Cara revealed a beautiful, modest white wedding dress, made of silk and chiffon. It was full length with long sleeves and a high collar. A note fell out as Cara pulled the dress up to look at it in all its splendour.

My Darling Niece Cara

Your Uncle revealed to me that as you're military and not civilian you were not eligible to collect rationing stamps for wedding attire. I'm afraid I couldn't allow you to marry in your uniform. Therefore I have gifted you my wedding dress and veil. They are a little old fashioned, please use them to redesign a dress that is both stunning and fabulous, I will expect to see this in the photographs! It will also act as your 'something old'

I have also enclosed a new blue garter edged with white lace as your 'something blue'

I can't tell you how devastated I feel not being there to dress you on the morning and give you some words of wisdom before you start life as a married woman. I'm afraid your Uncle feels it best for you to carry your life on anonymously away from the Churchill name. It's an ongoing argument where I want the family to know about you and embrace you.

I am still hoping that your Uncle and I will make some sort of brief appearance on your wedding day, I constantly plead with him.

I wish you every inch of happiness in your life with your new husband.

I will sign off simply with what was said to me

The husband maybe the head of the house, but the wife is the neck and she may turn that head any direction she wants! (Most of the time!)

All my love to you

Aunt Clemmie

"Ooh! What is it?" Eve asked rocking Rebecca in her arms as Cara finished reading the letter.

"It's my Aunt's wedding dress, she's asked that I redesign it and wear it!" Cara beamed as she accepted Rebecca from Eve and gently patted her back. "She going to be a heartbreaker!" Cara cooed, her attention now on the beautiful baby.

"I think we need to get to work on your dress, we haven't got much time!" Eve instructed holding the gown up "Oh it is beautiful but we definitely need to cut a lower neckline in for starters!"

"I'll go get the sewing box" Cara said as she moved towards the door.

"Is everything ok?" Eve asked suspicious, her best friend was not her usual bubbly self.

Cara turned and leaned against the door frame as Rebecca gurgled adorable sounds. "I think so"

"What does that mean?"

"It's Ron, before he left, we had sex and he wasn't his usual gentle self, he was well... a bit different"

"Oh, could it be nerves?"

"Ron!? Nervous?!"

"Mmmmm..., those words don't fit together, how was he different?"

"A little rough, no foreplay, it was amazing, but..."

"Not him?"

"He was a little like that the first time, but this time, I felt he...oh I don't know, I'm probably reading into it too much."

"If it's enjoyable, just go with it, I mean if he has different styles, then that's great really, your love life isn't going to get boring"

"Yes you're right as always Eve! I guess I was just expecting maybe a little more love before the wedding"

"You take him next time, slow him down, I did with Lew now and again, but with Rebecca here, we'll probably just squeeze it in when we can!" Eve chuckled

"Don't blame Rebecca, you and Lew unable to keep your hands off each other created those future quickies!" Cara laughed "Oh I have tried to take charge, but he likes to be the dominant one, I might have to get him pissed and take advantage when he's too inebriated!" Cara stood up straight "Right, come on Miss Nixon let's go find that sewing kit"

...

Eve sat in the wooden rocking chair, Lew had brought over from their cottage, she rocked back and forth slowly soothing Rebecca off to sleep. Lew had been over so often, she thought he'd welcome the break from the sleepless nights, but he wanted Rebecca to see him always, his son had only a photo of him, something he was eager to change when he returned to America. Eve watched as Fin stitched the dress, rationing had certainly brought out hidden talents in British women, making and sewing their own clothes more than ever. Eve admired how careful Fin was with the delicate fabric, taking her time. "I'm just going to pop Rebecca up to her cradle" Eve murmured, being careful not to stir the baby.

Fin looked up, she put the dress on the table "Let me"

Eve smiled and handed the sleeping tot over to the Godmother. Fin gently rocked Rebecca and walked up the stairs, carefully avoiding the boards that creaked too loudly.

Eve went over to the dress and picked it up, it was looking damn fine, Ron was a lucky bastard, although he'd probably be more concerned with getting the dress off! Eve chuckled. She patted the skirt down when she felt something. Eve turned the skirt inside out and sure enough, there was a pocket sewn in how strange! Eve thought, she stuck her hand in and felt the rustle of paper. Thinking it might have been something Fin's Aunt Clemmie had left, Eve took the envelope and carefully opened it. The glue wasn't overly sticky, it may have been opened before and resealed. Eve took the paper out and unfolded it.

"Everything ok?" Fin asked as she watched Eve fiddle with the dress

Eve looked up "Yes, just thought I'd continue stitching for you"

"I'll put some tea..." Fin was interrupted by the sound of Rebecca crying "Oh I was certain I got her down first time!"

"I'll go" Eve smiled as she stopped Fin and stood up. Eve looked back as Fin sat down and picked up the needle oh Fin, my dear best friend, please never need to read that note a tear ran down her face as she went to tend to her daughter.

...

Dearest Ron

I am struggling to come to come to terms with the fact that you may never come back to me. I wish I could move on and forget about this heart shattering episode you have put me through, but I can't.

My thoughts lay directly with you, day in day out. At night I lie awake thinking of what could have been, what should have been. I replay our relationship over and over trying to work out where the crack began. That's the problem, there was no crack, we were a perfect match. Your head was turned, she gave you something I didn't and I can't think as to what that could be.

Therefore, I have come to the only conclusion I can in order for me to live my life in peace. I think you owe me that much.

So here it is...

Do not marry her!

You must never see nor speak to Cara Finney ever again if you want her to live a full life.

Why?

Because if you do carry on your relationship with her, I will spend every waking moment of my life trying to hurt her. One day I might hit her with my car, one day I might push her into traffic, one day I might stand over her while she sleeps in your bed watching her chest rise and fall before pushing a knife slowly through her heart... She cannot hide because I will spend every second looking for her. You will not always be there to protect her and I will never leave her alone. I will never stop. EVER.

She will bleed the pain I have felt in my heart for you. I promise you this.

I love you Ron and will love you always.

Your darling Edie

Edie carefully sealed the envelope, spraying it a couple of times with some of her perfume. She had to do it this way, she knew he loved the whore, so how else was she going to keep the two of them apart? Threaten the one he loves, if he loves her enough, he'll protect her the only way he could...by not being with her and that suited Edie just fine, if she couldn't have him then she'd be damn sure the whore couldn't have him either.

Edie stepped out of her front door feeling confident things would be going her way. As she walked down the path and through the front garden gate, she headed over to where the groom was getting ready to deliver her promise. If this, wouldn't work, then she always had Plan B to fall back on.

Edie stood at his door, bent down she pushed the envelope under. The handle went and she darted away to the side of the house out of sight. She looked out to see Ron, he retrieved the letter from the floor and looked at it curiously. She watched as he opened and read it, she then watched as he crumpled it in his fist holding it there as if the letter would disintegrate in his hand before pocketing it and stalking off down the path. She was pleased it delivered the desired affect. She couldn't allow him to be happy on his second wedding day, he should only ever have been married once.

Edie was about to step out when she saw the brunette rush out the door and chase after Ron. Something was amiss maybe she had acted prematurely, maybe the whore was doing her job for her? Edie felt more confident than ever.

...

Cara stood in the bedroom, she had locked the door and as far as she felt right now, she would stay in there. She had completely panicked. Seeing Eve all dressed up with Rebecca and the Easy lads had come over in their dress uniforms, it just... who'd have thought her, Agent Loralie would be scared of a church full of people? Well she was and would much prefer walking into a room full of Gestapo right now. At least with Freddie, he had abandoned her in an empty church with only three witnesses. This time round she'd be abandoned in a full church. Who would make sure Ron would be there? No one because they were all shit scared of Sparky. Ron could do what he wanted and no one would challenge him. If she was abandoned at the altar for the second time then there would be absolutely no way she could marry a third time everything happens in three's you see. Cara fumbled Taylor's note between her fingers. She was tempted more than ever to read it, something to distract her mind...but she couldn't what if it said something to make her feel worse? She lifted her dress and popped it into the little pocket she'd sewn into the skirt.

Cara put her head in her hands, how had she allowed this? She promised herself not to fall in love again and most definitely not to get married. Cara felt a little flutter in her stomach. I know my sweet, you deserve a family

Knock knock

"Cara are you ok?" Eve asked gently from the other side of the door.

Cara heard the handle go, Eve would soon realise the door was locked.

"Cara, I know what this is about, but it's going to be ok"

Cara didn't answer, she didn't want Eve to know she was crying and therefore scold her for ruining her make up.

It went quiet, Eve had left and then not long after Cara heard footsteps once again.

"Baby?"

It was Ron, Cara froze, she didn't want him to know any of this, she would have pulled herself together? Or would she? She felt so anxious she didn't know what she was or wasn't capable of right now. They didn't cover this in training.

"Baby open the door" he asked gently. Cara liked this side to him, before they became a couple, his tone would change so much with her, mostly he would be angry.

"You can't come in" Cara managed to reply, disguising her emotional state.

"I won't, lets talk without a locked door between us, please baby, trust me"

Cara melted at his words of course she trusted him, she always would. Cara turned the key and leaned against the wall next to the doorway. The door opened and as he said, he didn't enter the bedroom.

Ron leaned against the other side, their backs against each other with only a thin wall separating them "Give me your hand" he asked

"We can't see each other it's bad luck" she replied just above a whisper

"I won't look at your hand"

"Ok"

Cara slowly moved her arm so that her hand was in the open doorway, she waited as Ron blindly located it with his. He stroked her soft skin as their fingers entwined, he held her gently, but firmly "Cara, you're shaking!"

"I'm fine"

"Baby you're not, but it's ok. You don't have to be brave all the time, you're allowed to have fears." Ron felt the anger he had the other day after she returned from that pilot, deep down he knew it was nothing and it wasn't Cara's fault. He took a deep breath and listened to her breathing. It was slow and calm considering he could still feel a slight shake from her hand. If only he could hold her, the soothing rhythm of her heartbeat would settle his anger quickly.

Ron had to talk through this, reassure her somehow, just say what you've always wanted to say "Out there during the war, all I could think about when the bullets were flying and the ground was exploding, was you, I wanted you to be the last thing I saw if I had to close my eyes for good. I tried to always be there for you, I sought you out so many times and you never knew. Just to watch you and make sure you were ok. I could hardly breathe when you were taken away from me."

Cara placed her free hand over her mouth and choked back the tears. What had Freddie done to her? Ron wasn't Freddie, she needed to stop being so pathetic! It was only a church, a church full of people who cared for her. She shook again, but this time through regret of putting Ron through this unnecessary worry.

Ron felt her shaking increase "Do ya know what you do to me? When you hold me and I can feel your heartbeat, it calms me, when you kiss me I quiver and go weak, when you look at me I question what you could love in a man like me. You waited for me, you spoke your feelings to me when I didn't. You forgave me when I didn't deserve it, you forgave me when I broke your heart. I'm gonna spend my life making you happy and to start, I'll be waiting at that altar, I'll wait there an eternity until you feel you can join me. I love you Cara."

Ron lessened his hold and reluctantly let Cara's hand slip from his. He slowly walked away.

"Ron!"

Ron stopped and turned "Yeah baby?"

"I love you too!"

Ron smiled "I know baby, you've always made sure I've known"

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have made you worry!"

"Baby, you're only human, just remember I'm never going to abandon you! You don't have to do anything but love me!"

"I do, I always do"

Ron chuckled "Save the 'I do' for the church!"

Ron walked away confident that Cara would be ok now. It was him, he was the one for her. He was her protector. Ron thought about asking what happened with that pilot, maybe one day he'll ask but right now it wasn't important.

"Ron!"

"Yeah?"

"There has never been any choice between you and Freddie, it's always been you darling" Cara called as if she had read his mind.

"Thank you baby" Ron smiled, she knew him too well.

Cara continued to lean against the wall as she heard Ron's footsteps fade away. The tears were starting to dry, she did feel a little calmer now that she'd heard his voice and his loving words, felt his hand, his firm hold comforted her. It was the same hold when she stumbled drunk on sherry that Christmas Eve, that held her against that tree in Bastogne, the same hold that desperately searched for her naked body underneath that towel in Hagenau, the hold that drunkenly took her up against the door in his room in Germany, the hold that held her on that stage in Zel am See after she returned from her gunshot wound, it was the same hold that held her after his proposal. She was ready, she was ready to walk down that aisle towards her future and marry the man she loved. She was ready to feel that hold again when the vicar would say Ron could kiss his bride, she was ready to feel that hold at their first dance as man and wife and she was ready to feel that hold intensify when she gave her husband his wedding present.

...

Ron paced up and down Nix's lounge feeling eager to get on with the day. He wanted to be in that church waiting for her. He couldn't be more happier, she knew that no matter what they went through as a couple, she could always talk to him and rely on him. Ron looked at his watch, it was time to join the men at the pub.

"Captain Speirs Sir" Luz called peeping his head round the door. He looked up at Luz with Tab, Malarky and Perconte hiding behind him "Come in" he replied to the Technician.

"Are you ready Sir?" Luz asked

"Why aren't you with Cara?" Speirs asked nervous that they might be bringing worrying news like Eve did.

"We've come to have a talk wiith you" Tab replied from behind Luz still.

Keeping a straight face Speirs laughed inside his head "You'd better come in and take a seat then" sitting down himself.

"We'll stand if that's ok with you Sir" Luz asked turning to glare at the men who slowly made their way out from behind him.

"Yeah that's fine by me and if it makes this any easier, we'll ignore ranks for you to say your piece openly"

"Thank you Sir " Perconte was heard saying from the back still.

"Well... erm..." Luz braced himself, he never imagined in his wildest dreams he'd be talking to Sparky this way, having drawn the short straw he had insisted that he had back up. "we just wanted to warn you that if you do anything and I mean anything to hurt our Fin, now or in the future..." Luz began bravely.

Speirs raised an eyebrow, his arms crossed his chest, he sat in amusement waiting for Luz to continue his speech.

"...erm... well...Fin will probably beat the crap out of ya! I would say we'd do it for her, but let's face it, she can look after herself, especially with that massive fuck off knife she keeps strapped to her leg!" Luz exclaimed "Ron...can I call you Ron?"

Speirs nodded putting his hand across his mouth to hide his grin.

"We're wishing you all the best of luck really, I mean if you two get in an argument, then our money is on Fin..." Luz continued "...sorry Ron, but it is. Our advice is don't piss her off and you'll have a great marriage!"

"Don't play poker with her either, she's really good!" Malarkey piped up

"Or ibble dibble, she's good at that too" Tab added "She tells dirty jokes and can drink you under the table" Tab prattled on.

"Oh and she dances dirty and sings rude songs and rhymes and she's pretty knowledgeable, maybe don't challenge her to a quiz" Luz joined Tab in the prattling. "And she shoots real good, so maybe another reason not to piss her off"

"And she swears a lot so watch her mouth around your mom!" Perconte concluded.

Speirs struggled to stifle his laughter, but managed just about as the four men stared at him. Instead of 'the talk' they basically just ended up ratting Cara out! He knew all this about her already, but he'd humour them nonetheless. Speirs composed himself "Well thanks for that, I didn't know you all cared so deeply for me!"

"Only looking out for ya Ron, Fin can look out for herself!" Luz replied as all they all burst out laughing.

On cue, Nix walked in confused "Thought you were right behind me?" He said to Ron

"I was but Luz and the men needed to get something off their chest" Speirs smirked. "We're back to Sir now as well!" he said as he chuckled silently to himself.

Nix looked at Luz "Good to hear Fin has you lot looking out for her!"

"Actually, they were looking out for me!" Speirs replied as he stood up, straightened his uniform and headed for the door, he definitely needed a little Dutch courage now.

Ron strolled over to the pub with Nix and Winters, He brushed his uniform down feeling Edie's crumpled letter in his pocket. He would bin it. There was no way he was ever going to leave Cara abandoned at the altar. He would always be there to protect her. Edie was also highly underestimating Cara, she had no idea of the skills Cara possessed. Thinking this didn't fill Ron with all hope though. Edie's letter had been direct and confident. He could hand it to the police, but they would probably only warn her and he didn't want to antagonise her on his wedding day. Once again, he would call her bluff.

...

"Fin?" Luz spoke calmly, still a little in disbelief that Sparky hadn't shot him.

Fin looked up from fixing her make up in the bedroom mirror to hear Luz's voice.

"Can I come in?"

"Yes"

Luz pushed the door open that Fin had only set ajar after Ron left, Fin turned to see the best expression on his face. "You approve?"

"Shit! Yes, Sparky is one lucky bastard!" Luz stared at Fin, he never thought she could look more beautiful, she looked so radiant he could have mistaken her for an angel if he didn't know her as being the total opposite. Snapping himself back into reality he pondered his question for only a moment "Look we all know no one is walking you down the aisle, we're guessing it's because you love us all and don't want to choose"

Fin smiled, nodding.

"I'm sorry to say that there was a bit of a fight..."

Fin looked at Luz full of concern "A fight?!"

Luz nodded "Afraid so, there were some underhand tactics, a lot of swearing...downright low and dirty actions from some of the men..." Luz paused and looked distant "a bit of crying and wondering about the meaning of life...but...finally after the onslaught..." Luz made eye contact as he swore Fin turned paler "the war was fucking easier, I'll tell ya!"

"Luz?" Fin questioned confused, wondering what the hell had been going on.

"Well... I finally beat em'" Luz picked up a bottle of something or other and fiddled with the ornate glass, running his fingers over the etchings.

"Beat them?"

"At rock-paper-scissors, so I could ask if you'd let me walk ya down the aisle!?" he grinned cheekily "I'm not best pleased about handing you over to Sparky, but I'll do it, just don't tell him I said that!"

Fin burst out laughing "Bloody hell Luz! You're going to ruin my make up!" she said dabbing her eyes with some tissue. "Oh you're still the funniest lad I've ever met!"

"Is that a yes?" he asked wide eyed.

Fin nodded "Of course it is you daft bugger! thank you so much" Fin walked over and embraced one of the lads she would always class as a best friend.

"We did actually play rock-paper-scissors ya know!" Luz confirmed making Fin laugh again.

...

Fin walked down the stairs as Eve, baby Rebecca and Luz waited for her. Eve gasped at the sight of her gorgeous best friend simultaneously admiring their handiwork on the dress. They had redesigned the dress with a sweetheart neckline, using the excess material to make a wider looking band around the waist. The layered silk and chiffon skirt then flowed outwards from the waist and kissed the floor just covering Fin's peep toe strapped heels. They had shortened the veil to the length of the dress and used the left over delicate netting to make capped sleeves after removing the longer ones. Cara had thought about it a lot , but finally left all her weapons in the bedroom. Her hair hung loose needing no decoration with the fancy veil. As much as Eve gushed over her friend, she could see the pocket on the inside of the dress, it wasn't visible to anyone, not even to her, but that pocket containing that heavy burden stood out a mile.

"Will I do?" she asked as she reached the bottom of the stairs relieved she hadn't fallen making another sort of entrance.

Eve nodded unable to speak from fear of blubbering instead. Luz grinned handsomely in his dress uniform and offered out his arm to escort the bride on the short walk to the church.

As they walked outside a black and grey Daimler screeched to a halt right in front of them causing Luz to smack the roof with his hand in anger. The driver peeped his head out and Luz stuttered an apology.

The driver ignoring Luz, grinned from ear to ear "Quick jump in Cara I'm here to rescue you!" The recognisable raspy voice of the British Prime Minister called.

Cara laughed doubling over as the driver's and passenger doors opened and Cara's Uncle and Aunt stepped out. Aunt Clemmie rounded the car quickly and embraced her niece. Pulling away she hastily revealed a long blue box in her hand, she opened it to reveal an ivory pearl necklace to which she immediately clasped around Cara's neck. Cara's Uncle took his turn to embrace his niece before handing Eve two envelopes for safe keeping, the larger of the two addressed to Captain R. C. Speirs the other addressed to Captain & Mrs R. C. Speirs.

"I am being serious Cara, I can whisk you away right now and we'll go find you a spiffing English gent!" Winston boomed, enjoying his own tomfoolery.

"No we won't! He's trying to be funny!" Clemmie chuckled at Luz who stood still shocked that he was standing in front of the British Prime Minister.

"Be a good Yank and pass this onto the groom and groomsmen!" Winston instructed handing a box of his favourite cigars over and then getting a single one from inside his coat and placing it in Luz's pocket for him.

"I...I will Sir, thanks!" Luz smiled finally closing his fly catching mouth.

Cara thanked her Uncle and Aunt for taking the risk to come and see her, although brief, she appreciated their effort as her only relatives to have been there. Once gone, Cara took Luz's arm again, she could smell the comforting odour of one of her Uncles cigars on him as they continued their short journey to the church, the village was surprisingly quiet with only a few locals out to see the bride. Little did Cara know that most of them were inside the already packed church.

...

Edie stood by a lamp post on the opposite side of the road, her tired eyes watched as the heavenly bride appeared to float across the road towards the church. Edie hated her even more, the whore couldn't possibly be this perfect. There would be a weakness and Uncle Hugo would find it, the matter now being in his hands. Her ex husband had indeed dismissed her letter like her Uncle had warned. A foolish move by Captain Speirs, for he would now be responsible for Cara Finney's death.