Here you go everyone, the final chapter of this book! A heck of a long chapter too! And yes, Myrana and Kai will have troubles for well... Pretty much until Day of the Departed. Maybe they'll get their acts together, but I doubt it. Thank you Rina Hawski for saying that my fanfiction fits yo're criteria, that's what I was hoping for when I made this! Anyways, without further ado... The last chapter of When You're Afraid of Breaking Time!
The light of the morning woke me up, along with the others. I packed my sleeping bag up, and went into the woods. I stayed around the border of the forest, not daring to lose myself inside. Eventually, I sat down and watched the Ninja from afar. I didn't feel like talking, not now.
Admittedly, I was worried what the Ninja were thinking of me right now. I know Lloyd is likely on his own last straw, despite him getting encouragement from me. Kai despises my secrecy, and demands control. Jay is accustomed to my presence, but he doesn't talk to me. I think he's still afraid deep down, he just isn't able to handle it as well. Cole never talks to me often, I think he doesn't see me as someone on the team. He respects that I am not a Ninja, or part of the team, and so he doesn't order me around. Zane likely sees me as a learning tool, something to learn about exotic worlds. However, he is able to handle my crimes easier.
Now Sensei is someone who doesn't talk to me too often either. However, he last asked me to take care of the Ninja. If that's anything to go by, I guess he must imagine me as some sort of guardian angel for his team. Sensei Wu is sorely mistaken, if that's the case. Misako doesn't talk to me either, perhaps I am an oddity in her eyes. After all, I gave her strict rules about asking me questions. Zane's father doesn't know me well enough, perhaps he is like Misako. Though I think he is able to brush over it easier than Lloyd's mother.
I stopped pondering on the others when I noticed Kai and Lloyd arguing. Lloyd looked really upset, and Kai pointed towards me. I stood up, and I had a rough guess about what they were fighting about. Surely it was about me! I didn't want them to have to fight over me. They shouldn't have to in the first place.
Walking out of the brush, I noticed the argument grew larger, and clear sides were taken between the sides. Lloyd and Zane were on one side of the fight, both looking exasperated. Kai, Jay, and Cole were on the other side, giving the sense of a clear line between the team. Kai looked frustrated, likely unable to get his point across. Cole seemed in a determined supportive pose, obviously agreeing with Kai. Jay shivered hesitantly, looking unsure and hesitant about arguing. I got closer, and started to hear the argument.
"-She's dangerous! She also has been keeping secrets, and I think she knows the future!" Kai aggressively yelled.
"I may suspect the same thing, but she is still young, and everyone has their secrets. You cannot blame her for such things." Zane retaliated.
"Besides, she's my sister! If she really didn't care, she wouldn't be there when I needed her! I understand that she can't help me when I'm fighting, no matter how much I want her to help! It's you who can't get over it, Kai!" Lloyd yelled back.
"You know, you all got good points. Though I think that I might need to explain this again. I'm here to observe, so I can only really be here for morale at the very best. Anyone can be dangerous, it just takes a little bit of knowledge and a motive. Have you not looked at yourselves? I can only swing around a metal stick, while you guys are legitimate trained assassins. Think about that, a kid against someone who can create a tornado with only their body. Using dangerous as a description is a double edged sword for you guys. Like Zane said, we all have our secrets. It's natural, guys. I understand you're likely on edge, and you probably don't like what I do. I get that, but I'm not here to hinder you. I'm here to make sure everything stays the way it should, I can't turn everything in your favor forever. One day I'll be completely useless, and there will be nothing to stop that.
"However, I am here now, and right now we need to focus on different things. If you haven't noticed, there's a giant cloud above Ninjago, and it doesn't look like a puffy friendly cloud. If you want to dethrone Napoleon, then I suggest you start thinking of some sort of way to get back to Ninjago." I finished, trying to keep the argument from going on any further.
"Well, she isn't wrong." Cole shrugged.
"But you've avoided my key point, do you know the future?" Kai growled. I didn't know how to answer, so I remained silent.
"Kai, I think that's enough…" Jay meekly warned.
"No it's not! She's constantly given the chance to help Lloyd, and she never does! She knows things that she shouldn't know! Like 'oh, we have to keep time on track, they mean this or that.' I'm tired of being kept in the dark!" Kai yelled, and Sensei came over to intervene.
"That is enough Kai. We have more important matters." Sensei Wu said, guiding Kai away from me.
"I'm just going to go back to the forest, maybe try to find something to do. You all have your opinions, and you are entitled to thinking whatever you want. See you, I guess." I awkwardly shrugged, and Lloyd hopped behind me. I turned, and decided to help him towards the forest's edge.
"You know, you haven't exactly talked too much about being at my father's camp." Lloyd noted as I helped him sit beside me.
"Well, I can't exactly remember too much about being there. They tried to use the Dark Matter on me, but apparently I got a bit drunk or something, and I rambled about things I shouldn't have been. Your dad didn't seem to understand it, which was good, but he'll fit the pieces together too. After that, I was left in that room and isolated until you guys came around and opened the door. I was fed, which was nice at least. Since I didn't interact with anyone, I suppose that there isn't much to share." I explained, and Lloyd nodded.
"Did you get hurt at all?" Lloyd said as he made tried to make sure that I didn't hide any injuries.
"No, I'm fine. Sadly, it seems you can't say the same." I sighed, looking towards Lloyd's broken, or at least fractured, leg.
"As long as you're alright, sis. I'm sorry about Kai, he doesn't trust you very much. He doesn't like what you've done in the past, and we all know how stubborn he can be about things like that." Lloyd explained, and I shook my head.
"There's no reason to be sorry for what isn't your fault. Kai's completely justified, I understand. His fear is completely rational, and that logic applies to most people. Even though I can understand, I don't exactly enjoy it. It just gets a bit stressful after a long time. Besides, there is still a long way to go for all of us. Maybe one day we'll fix everything, but for now I am just going to leave him alone. He needs to give up something for me, because I have given up a lot myself." I defended Kai slightly. After all, would any person who was normal stay relaxed with someone who has had past incidents of violence?
"You still forgive him?" Lloyd questioned, a bit surprised.
"Forgive? No. Understand? Yes. I still have my own opinions, and so does he. I get where he is coming from, but that doesn't mean I have to enjoy it. Kai is a bit too much of a hothead for his own good, and there isn't anyone to stop him sometimes. I'm practically a frustrating, unsolvable puzzle, and he wants control. I don't think he likes not being in control, I suspect something in his past caused that. Besides, I'm scrambling for the same thing. Control, because my life used to be bright and the future looked good for me. Then something out of my control happened, and I've been trying to catch up." I replied, remembering the day I had simply popped into existence.
"What is there to control? Us, or something else?" Lloyd wondered, looking towards me with concern.
"I want to control my future, have a good education, and live a good life. I can't get that now, everything here is different. Your history is completely messed up, and I can hardly make sense of Ninjago's age. Physics here are completely different, and your very culture is separate from mine. I want to make sure you guys have a bright future too, and that you climb to greatness together. But I can't help forever, and I dread the day I become nothing more than a stupid girl with outlandish dreams." I lamented, worried for my own future, and what I'd become.
"No, no! That's not true, you aren't stupid! You're special, just like the rest of us. You matter, got that? Because we care for you, even if we argue about you. I think even Kai would save you if you were in danger." Lloyd reassured me. I remained silent.
"Look, I know you've had it rough, especially compared to us. But that doesn't mean you're stupid." Lloyd tried to support me.
"My understanding of the world is very different than yours. My understanding doesn't fit your world, and cold hard facts of science are swept away here. Evolution, the Big Bang, physics, quantum mechanics, and so much more just don't exist here. There isn't spinjitzu, there's no Ninja to just swoop in and save the day. There's no magical enemies, or people with powers. If my worldview and understanding of the world is different than everybody else's then I'm wrong to you. Then you want to fix that, and having that different view would make me look stupid." I sadly sighed.
"You have your own special circumstances for that. Since you're from another dimension, then of course there are different rules! You've just gotta realize that you're smart, in a different way." Lloyd retaliated. I went silent again. I didn't know how to reply, I felt what he was saying was untrue. However, I just didn't know how to retaliate.
"You're too loving for your own good." I responded simply.
"You are my sister, of course I care! You've just been having a rough time." Lloyd deduced, and gave me a hug. I hugged him back, I must have been dreaming! No one would ever lay out their heart so readily, especially for me!
"Thanks for keeping your promise." I whispered in happiness, and Lloyd just pat my back.
"I understand what you were talking about now, I trust you." Lloyd quietly mumbled.
"Then forgive me in the future, please. I'm afraid I'll blame myself too much for it, or I won't bother with it until I snap." I admitted.
"It?" Lloyd asked worriedly.
"I don't want to talk about it…" I trailed off, and we let go of our hug.
"Alright, but just be careful. You've really been stressing me out for the past while." Lloyd said.
"I'll do the best I can, brother." I promised. We sat in silence for a while, looking at the dark cloud covering Ninjago. After a while, Cole motioned us to come back to the camp. I helped Lloyd hop back down to camp, still feeling partially guilty for the leg.
"What's up? Did you guys find something?" Lloyd asked as we approached the camp.
"Not quite. We were hoping that we could get you two on good terms. It's affecting us all more than we thought it would." Cole explained, looking exhausted.
"I can try my best. Extending the olive branch is never easy, but I have to try. If not for me, then for you guys. You shouldn't even have to deal with these arguments anyways." I sighed, and Cole blinked confusingly. I didn't want to get on good terms with him, not at all! He's been a complete jerk, and he just doesn't stop! But I had to, if it was affecting everyone else so badly. It would be catastrophic if a wrong battle was lost because Kai and I fought.
"Not sure what a branch has to do with all of this, but if you think it'll help… Go ahead. Kai's been very… Uh, whiny and aggressive since yesterday." Cole admitted, and I nodded. I walked around to find Kai, and I found the others looking tired out too. Jay fidgeted when he saw me, but stayed on the ground tiredly. Soon enough I found Kai throwing pebbles into the sea.
"What is it going to take for us to stop fighting and being stubborn around here? I know we might never get along, but we need to tolerate each other for your team's sake. Cole looks exhausted, and so does everyone else. We have to think about them a little, we can't just keep fighting if this is the outcome." I called out to him, and he turned sharply, irritation on his face.
"Why is it always you? You keep causing problems, and every time you can help," A pebble was thrown angrily, "You just ignore the chance!" Kai yelled.
"You tell me, Kai. I didn't willingly come here. I once thought that escaping my reality would be amazing, but it's not. I didn't think about any of the consequences. Any! I can't do everything for you guys either! I'm not your mother, and I'm helpless too! I can't donate money to help feed you, I can't get people to rain supply packs from the sky! I have to act, speak, and live within specific rules every day, and get used to the physics, the social rules, culture, and so much more! I-I can't help because I'm already having trouble helping myself. I didn't want it to be me. I understand your fear and skepticism, I get it. I had to live with the idea that being in a coffee shop was dangerous if it were touristy, because someone might intentionally kill everyone in the shop. But we need to stop fighting and tolerate each other, because no one is benefitting from it. We can't force everyone else to deal with us. Truce?" I rambled, hoping that Kai would understand.
"Truce? You seriously can't be trying this with me!" Kai growled out, still quite angry.
"What else am I supposed to do? It's affecting everyone else, you should've seen how exhausted they were! We have to tolerate each other, for them!" I shouted back desperate.
"Why should I believe you?" Kai raged, stepping forwards to stare down at me.
"What do you want? I can't keep arguing forever! Please Kai, I need something! Anything! This can't just go on for eternity. We'll both go crazy." I desperately cried out, but Kai did not hold back.
"You tell me if you know the future, then I'll leave you alone forever." He demanded. I looked down, pondering.
Was it worth it? Was it worth telling him, the one secret that I would rather die for? Could I trust Kai to never tell anyone?
No.
I can't trust him, and I was willing to die for my secret. No one will know until the day after Day of the Departed. If he wants to pummel me into the ground, and I die, so be it. It's too dangerous.
"Good day Kai." I stared into his eyes for a moment, and his anger flared. He growled, but turned his back. I turned away too, heading back to the camp.
"Did you guys solve your problems?" Lloyd asked as I came back.
"No. Kai's still angry with me, and I'm still angry with him. There's just been too much lately, and you have Napoleon to take down. Maybe someday, but not today." I explained, and Lloyd sighed in disappointment.
"I still don't understand why you can't get over it. It shouldn't be too hard right?" Lloyd asked in complaint.
"Not this time Lloyd, not this time." I sadly spoke, looking out into the distance.
Then the falcon swooped and circled above us, giving out a piercing cry to get our attention. I stood up, helping Lloyd get up too.
"Hey. it's the falcon!" Lloyd pointed out the obvious.
"I think the falcon wants to show us something!" Julien explained, and the falcon screeched in agreement.
"Then what are we waiting for? It's got to be important!" I shouted in approval.
"We can take the mech, it'll be faster." Kai suggested, and we got on the mech. Kai wasn't pleased wit me being on his mech, but we were on bad terms. We had to be civil, just for the sake of the team.
"So what are you guys even fighting about? It's getting tiring hearing you two go on and on against each other." Jay complained as Kai followed the falcon.
"I want to know if she knows the future." Kai coldly replied, giving me a harsh stare.
"I want to be left alone. I've got too much on my mind already. Besides, what Kai is asking is kind of silly." I shrugged off Kai's harsh response.
But deep down, I knew that he had figured everything out. He knew, he just needed confirmation. Confirmation that I will defend and die for. I refuse to be tortured into telling, I want a quick death, then nothing in life will matter to me.
"I beg to differ, Starlord. You've given multiple clues about your knowledge. I must agree with Kai if he believes you know the future, as you have given a lot of evidence to prove you do." Zane practically asked.
"Okay then. Then think for a split second. If I truly know the future… Why should I tell you? We had the incident of time travel when Garmadon decided to try and stop Lloyd from becoming the Green Ninja. Did you tell your past selves what was to come? Chances are you didn't, because that might ruin too much of the future. Come on, you're trying to talk time travel with a Doctor Who enthusiast over here!" I counter argued
"What's a 'Doctor Who?'" Cole asked, confused. I gasped in mock-horror.
"What? You haven't heard about a television show from another dimension about how a timelord travels in his TARDIS through space and time? How shocking." I sarcastically stated, knowing that it wasn't his fault he didn't know the greatness of Doctor Who.
"Geez, I get it. No need to get so riled up about it." Cole grumbled.
"Sorry, just on edge lately. I just haven't had the time to cool down as much as I would like." I apologized.
"And you still haven't answered my question." Kai mumbled.
"Yeah, you can get the answer if you wait patiently, or I can tell you and jump off a cliff to certain death. Even then, I'd still probably jump off the cliff without telling you." I angrily replied.
"Then you do know!" Kai accused. I growled. I am done with this camp, I am done with these people, I am just done. I jumped and reached for Kai, an obvious punch raised to hit him square in the face. Kai let go of the controls to block me, and the mech tipped dangerously mid step.
"DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW STRESSED I AM EVERY SECOND OF MY EXISTENCE? STOP ASKING ME STUPID QUESTIONS! HERE, JUST FREAKING LEAVE ME ON THE BEACH UNTIL YOU DO YOUR LITTLE 'DEUX EX MACHINA!' I CAN'T STAND YOU!" I screamed as I relentlessly attempted to punch Kai, and he easily blocked them all.
"Sis, stop!" Lloyd cried out. I gave him a short, curt, and colorful response that made even Kai gasp in surprise.
"Where did you even learn that word?" Cole yelled at me. I tried to strangle Kai for one last time, before deciding to jump down and run to the beach before they could catch me.
"We will see each other again on the beach, we have more pressing matters." Sensei Wu guided his students, but there was a twinge of disappointment in his voice. I sprinted for a short while, before I found a perch overlooking the beach. It was towards the edge of a cliff, a rocky little stick of land above everything else.
Kai just couldn't stop, could he? I tried everything, and I'm sick and tired of him trying to poke his nose where it doesn't belong! Even he should know that I didn't want to talk about my knowledge like that! Being so aggressive, it was so unlike him! He usually would back off at this point, I guess he did once. Just… Maybe not with me and my special circumstances.
"This is more complicated than I thought it would be…" I trailed off, staring at the ocean down below. I pulled out my pen from my pack. I was glad that Garmadon didn't confiscate it, but I had to admit that I never carried any knives. From what I already have done, it would be really risky to give me anything sharp.
"Why do I do exactly what I don't want to do? I hate it!" I shrieked at the sea, holding my pen up in protest.
"Why me? I don't want this! I don't want to tarnish a happy world! I don't want to ruin their lives!" I screamed as I waved my pen around angrily, pointing at the seas. I accuse this cursed land for bringing me here! I screamed in frustration before I took deep breaths. I stared at the ocean for a moment longer, then moving down the hill down to the beach.
Walking upon the sand, I dragged my feet to make a big 'X.' At least they would be able to see me. I sat in the center, and I started to wonder again. Why was I here? Why me? I'm not special, I don't have some sort of 'great' power, I'm not important…
A roar pierced the air and I jumped at the suddenness of the noise. I suppose they found the mech, and Lloyd's probably enjoying it.
Oh man, I swore at him! Ninjago has little swearing, if any at all! Well, it seems like they knew the word, but just never used it. God, I must seem like a horrible person to them… And I swore at my own brother! What kind of person was I to swear at my own brother? On Earth, very few people cared, but this wasn't Earth. This was Ninjago, a whole different world filled with new cultures and lifestyles. And I swore at my own brother. Lloyd was older, that I knew, but he's still a bit kid-like on the inside. He needs support too!
"I want the world to stop, but the world will never stop. No matter if I die or live, everything will go on into eternity." I lamented to myself. They should just leave me here on this island, I mess up too many things for us to live together.
"Starlord?" Zane called out to me from the forest behind me. I stood up abruptly, and looked back in surprise. Where were the others?
"Zane? Where's everyone else? I also heard the dragon too." I called out to the nindroid. Zane paused for a moment, looking unsure.
"They… Are having a hard time processing what you did. We won't leave without you, but you definitely made an impact." Zane replied, walking up carefully. Was he afraid too?
"I'm having a hard time too. I didn't mean that… I just want people to leave me alone. Actually, I just want Kai to leave me alone. There's been too much going on for me! How did I even fool myself into doing this?' I sniffled, the pressure starting to take it's toll. Zane didn't say anything, he just walked up to me slowly, before putting a hand on my shoulder.
"You're afraid, aren't you?" I whispered, looking up at Zane sadly. He didn't say anything or move. I dropped to my knees before finally curling up into a ball, sobbing into the sand.
"I-I messed up e-everything! I e-even swore a-at L-Lloyd! I-I…" I cried into the sand, stuttering as I thought about what I did. Zane kneeled down beside me, unsure of how to help.
"S-Starlord?" I heard Lloyd call out to me. I curled up even tighter, ashamed of what I did.
"Are you okay? Are you hurt?" Lloyd rushed as he came over, inspecting for injuries.
"I'm sorry Lloyd! I didn't mean to, I was angry and I-I…" I weeped out, hugging him quickly. He jumped back in surprise, but didn't hug back.
"I'm sorry that I said that to you! I shouldn't have fought with Kai, or yelled at you! You just wanted to help out, and I-I did something unacceptable! I'm sorry, I'm so so sorry… I'm so-orry…" I weeped into Lloyd's shoulder.
"I can't keep doing this…" Lloyd sighed, not hugging me back.
"What do you mean?" I sniffled out.
"You're so… I don't know, contradicting. You always say that you care, and you always say sweet little things and then you just go ahead and knock down everything you said… It's getting too hard to deal with it." Lloyd whispered out, his body starting to shake slightly. I stiffened, unsure what he was going to say next. I had a guess though.
Was he going to leave me behind?
"We're just going to take you back to Ninjago, and then once all this is over, you have to go home." Lloyd told me, spitting up our hug.
I swore I heard my heart shatter.
"Are you still my brother?" I weeped out, tears flowing from my eyes. Lloyd didn't answer.
I put my heart into him, I gave him my life!
"I loved you like a brother! I put everything into you, I gave you more than I did to anyone else! You even figured out one of my biggest secrets and now you push me away?" I sobbed hysterically, moving away from Lloyd.
"I-I..." Lloyd stuttered, and I ran away, not listening to another word of what he was going to say.
"Leave me on this island for all I care! It's better than having to live in a world where I see an empty memory of a family in a new world!" I screamed as I ran away, attempting to get away from the two.
"Starlord!" They both called out to me, running behind me. I didn't dare look back, I couldn't. I breathed heavily and erratically as I ran, desperately pushing my limits to get away. A hand grabbed my arm as I was running and I screamed.
"LET GO OF ME!" I yelled at the top of my lungs, tears blurring my vision to see a green blob. A white blob came up and grabbed my other arm.
"Calm do-" Zane started to say, but I kicked at him mid-sentence.
"NO! LEAVE ME ALONE!" I cried out, thrashing against the two ninja.
"P-Please, you've got to come back. Once this is all over then you can go ho-" Lloyd started but yelled at him mid-sentence.
"HOME? YOU USED TO HELP ME MAKE A HOME HERE! NOW IT'S ONLY HIM WHO WILL EVER MAKE THIS PLACE FEEL LIKE HOME!" I raged at Lloyd, and he flinched back.
"S-sta-" Lloyd tried to defend himself, but I was hurt too much inside to care.
My fragile heart was broken.
Between Kai and Lloyd, I just couldn't handle it anymore.
"YOU BROKE MY HEART! YOU'VE SHATTERED IT! GO ON AND BE WHAT DESTINY WANTS YOU TO BE WITHOUT ME! I-I D-oOn't ca-a-re a-any-ymore…" I weeped out, my resistance fading.
"Starlord, will you walk back with us?" Zane asked carefully.
"You'll have to drag my body." I angrily whispered, childishly slumping against the sand. Lloyd picked me up, Zane letting go. I was being held bridal style by Lloyd as he started to walk back to the forest. Zane followed behind, but I made it very hard for Lloyd to carry me by not holding on to him.
He can feel my pain of that moment, where he did not embrace me back.
He broke my heart into a million shards.
Lloyd was the only one who I put some sort of heart into on this team. He was my brother, was the only one who truly believed in me, was the only one I trusted with my heart.
And now he just threw that all away.
He knew what I looked like, he saw me at my weakest. He saw me when I broke down. He held my heart in his hand, and he crushed it.
Nothing but dust now.
We arrived at a clearing where the Ultra Dragon was standing, along with the Ninja on its back. The Golden Mech stood nearby, inactive.
"What's wrong with Starlord?" Misako asked with concern. I didn't respond, just remaining limp in Lloyd's arms.
"Later." Lloyd snapped back, his tone serious. He took me into his Golden Mech, somehow fitting both of us inside. I took my pen and one piece of paper from my pack. It was my last piece of paper.
The people with the hardest outsides, have the most fragile of hearts.
I wrote it in complete English, and I handed it back to Lloyd. He took the paper hesitantly, unsure about what would be written on it. As soon as he looked at it, his brows furrowed in confusion.
"When you can read it, then I will talk to you again." I said, staring out the mech.
"But, I can't. It's written in some weird language." Lloyd muttered.
"Exactly." I curtly replied, watching the others fly the dragon up, before we lifted off too. It was a silent ride to Ninjago, the ocean bland and boring. The dark clouds ahead were foreboding, and we flew above them.
Lloyd dove down into the clouds, and I scrambled to grab something, screaming with my mouth shut. I didn't like the drop!
Things started to blur a little, and the glowing mech I was in seemed a lot brighter than it was before.
"Why does the mech look brighter?" I slurred, starting to pet and drag my hands over the mech's golden surface.
"Are you alright?" Lloyd asked, looking at me with concern.
"Dind't I tell you I got heh or drenk last time I had bean around derkness?" I tried to speak.
"Oh no. Just sta- st-ll alr-t?" Lloyd spoke, but everything seemed so blurry.
"I rember dat you was gon get eld, you wissed dat you wise. She ded fer a ew sec. Germy ded too. Ne one specul." I started to mess with Lloyd. I heard the others say something, but I was focusing on Lloyd's shiny shoulder-thingies.
"You were bro. You held hert. Brok et. Famely. Gerne nu. Only un left. Nu mer tust." mumbled, toying with the shiny gold.
"Wh-t?" Green blob spoke.
"I herv creppln dpressn." I happily replied. Then we hit ground, and I got taken out of the big golden thing. I was given to white blob, and gold blob left wit green blob.
I heard blue blob cry out, and I looked to see a big black extra-blurry blob. It hit me, and I fell down.
Everything was so blurry and bright and the smooth ground felt like nails! Everything felt oversensitive, and I screamed and sobbed as I felt it all over my body. I heard the blobs talk, before they walked away, and I was left behind. I wailed and screamed, and more blobs surrounded me, but grey with purple dots. They tried to touch me, but I screamed louder if they did, and everything became a blank blur.
"We did it." Lloyd said as he leaned over me, the sun burning brightly in the sky.
"What happened? It looks like you won… But what happened to me? I got drunk or whatever again, along with everything becoming oversensitive. That was really painful, it still hurts a bit, and now I have a headache." I groaned out, not sitting up.
"You were screaming earlier, and the guys had to leave so that their cover wouldn't be blown. After a while, you passed out and it took us an hour to find you because we thought you moved." Lloyd replied, moving to block the sun. Garmadon walked up to Lloyd, peering down at me.
"Nice to see you're yellow again. Say, can you tell Zane to go and have fun with his dad? Play catch or something, I don't know. He isn't going to last forever, and I'll admit neither are you." I whisper-yelled, trying not to make the headache worse.
"Uh, alright..?" Garmadon hesitantly agreed.
"Thanks. I'm going to pass out again here, I'm really tired." I whispered as the world went dark again.
Beep! Beep! Beep! Bee-
I woke up slowly, pressing a random button on the alarm clock next to me to silence it. Yawning, I looked at the room I was now in. My pack was on the floor nearby, and a letter was on the nightstand next to me. I had a TV, and a small chair with a desk. Looking at the letter, I grabbed it and opened it. Parts of it were scratched out.
Starlord,
I feel bad for what I said on the Dark Island, but it had to be done. I still see you as my big sister, but I hesitated. That broke your heart and I'm sorry for that. But you have to go home, and I think you know why. This hotel room will not last into tonight, so you have to move today.
You have to go. I -. I want to say I'm sorry for hesitating. I shouldn't have broke your heart like that. It - -. Argh, I don't know how else to say it! I'm so sorry for breaking your heart. -
Go back to your home. See your old friend or something, just don't come back. It's too dangerous to have you around. -. -
See you when I figure out what you wrote.
Lloyd
I took off my hood, and a tear stained the side of Lloyd's name. He still saw me as a big sister… But he was pushing me away? I don't even know where he is! I took my hood, and yelled into it, just like I did before Lloyd comforted me as a child. I screamed about my stupid heart, my stupid life, and how stupid they were to let me go. I was going to come back whether they liked it or not, but it still hurt.
Everything hurt.
I sobbed into the hotel pillow and my hood, clutching the letter tightly. I kept thinking on and on about how stupid I was to say yes that day. It hurt too much, and I just couldn't live with them. I soon put the hood back on, afraid to stain the letter.
Was this what a true broken heart felt like?
If it was, I didn't ever want to live with it again. Heck, why live?
A nagging voice inside me yelled, "Vastu!" But he could live without me. He had Rahu, and he could find someone else. I wasn't that important. Nobody else wanted me around, and I didn't even belong anyways. My knowledge has already been suspected, so why not just jump out the window?
I slowly walked to the window, looking down. It was a good six stories. I opened the window with hesitance. Did I really want to do this?
What else did I have?
Nothing. Nothing but a pen and hands covered in the blood of others.
I sat inside the window frame, staring at the ground beneath me. People moved around, trying to clean up the streets. None of them looked up at me, nobody noticed. I stared down at them, still contemplating whether I should slip forward and drop. It wouldn't take much effort at all, the smallest of movements and I would fall to an irreversible death.
Little things kept making me hesitate, and s-
Lloyd?
"AHHHHHHHHHH!" I screamed as I fell down, Lloyd's appearance scaring me out of the window.
"Starlord?" Lloyd yelped in surprise, but he soon gained a determined look and he spinjitzu-ed up to catch me. I landed on top of him as we hit the ground, my fall greatly slowed down by Lloyd. Before I could even think about what just happened, Lloyd was hugging me.
"Oh my goodness, you're alright! You're safe, you're not dying…" Lloyd whispered in relief. The citizens noticed us, but turned away quickly when they realized that this was more serious than what they could see. However, as soon as I opened my mouth to say something, Lloyd broke the hug and held my shoulders tightly, staring me in the eyes.
"What did you think you were doing up there? Are you crazy? You could have died! Why were you even sitting in the window like that?" Lloyd demanded, and I flinched back slightly.
"I was wondering if I should suicide." I whispered, and Lloyd immediately softened.
'Why in the world would you even think about that?" He softly asked, putting his hands on my shoulders.
"Wh-hy shouldn't I? P-People don't n-need me-e and I wi-l-ll nev-ver belong…" I cried, looking down. Lloyd lifted my chin, gently making me look at him.
"You are worth so much more than that! I need you, you're my sister! I could hardly stand the thought of having to push you away, but I had to do it because the team struggles to have you around. Maybe you don't belong with them, but you do belong with me. I love you big sis, and I don't want you to ever try anything like that again! I'm going to stick to you like glue, because it looks like I can't trust you to be on your own." Lloyd insisted, and I just stared at him.
"And the t-thing is… I can t-tell you're telling the truth b-because you s-suck at lying.." I laughed out, and Lloyd pouted a little. But he soon smiled, and hugged me again. I slowly hugged him back, sighing into his shoulder.
"Please, gosh, please don't ever do that again… I care about you too much to have you…" Lloyd trailed off, too afraid to finish his sentence.
"I know, I know now. I'm not going to go and try to die anymore." I reassured Lloyd.
"You know I can't trust that. I'm not letting you near danger for a long time now. Sis, I just can't imagine a world without you!" Lloyd said. Yet, I still could. It still hurt to know that I wasn't really needed. But maybe, just maybe… I did belong.
"Thank you. You still manage to be here when I really need you…" I sighed, relieved I hadn't lost my brother, my lifeline. If something happened to him and I didn't know about it, well that future can wait.
"That's what siblings are for, right?" Lloyd chirped.
"Yeah…" I happily sighed as we hugged for a little while longer.
God, what was I going to do when Zane dies? If this already nearly pushed Lloyd to the edge, would he really leave me if I knew that Zane was going to explode? He's my lifeline! If he leaves, then I'm not going to survive! I can't have an emotional bond like that broken, especially not here. I could go back to Vastu, but I'd have to face an empty memory every time the Ninja went on a mission if Lloyd left. I stressed for a bit more, before deciding that it was finally time to stop hugging on the street.
"I think I should probably check out..." I awkwardly laughed, and Lloyd let go of me.
"It's fine, I already got that covered. Do you just want to head back home?" Lloyd asked.
"Yeah." I simply answered, getting up and stretching.
"Here I can giv-" Lloyd started but I cut him off.
"No dragon! We're going the old fashioned way. Besides, I could use a little stamina and it wouldn't hurt to look around Ninjago while we walk." I refused, rather wanting to walk.
"You want to walk?" Lloyd asked incredulously.
"Yes. Bringing a dragon will freak people out, and do you really want to trust me on a moving object with little safety measures when you couldn't trust me with a six-story high hotel room?" I questioned. Lloyd 'oh'ed in response, and quickly agreed.
"Good. Pack up something, and I have food. I didn't eat too much on the Dark Island, so I have enough rations for the two of us for a week. I've got about one-thousand nine-hundred Jyn, so if you need clothes I can get you something for cheap. I'm surprised I haven't spent that much. I think it's because I could shower and do laundry for free on the Bounty." I shrugged, and Lloyd hesitantly accepted my offer. He didn't have any money. We bought a little bit of clothes and started walking to Jamanakai.
"Come on, it's a disguise…" Lloyd whined as we walked out of the city.
"So what? Money makes the world go 'round! Capitalism! You've got to have money if you want to do anything!" I poked fun at him.
"You and your weird words…" Lloyd laughed. However, the mood darkened quickly.
"I wasn't always this serious, you know." I said as I looked up at the bright blue sky.
"Really? It's kind of hard to imagine you any other way…" Lloyd responded.
"I was once a lot more cheery. I used to have a more outgoing social life. I felt like I was going to take over the world! I had a bright future ahead, I was perfectly set, and I was even still decent at PE. It's just… This set everything off, and now I'm not going to be the hero I wanted to be. I wanted to cure the deadliest of diseases, or travel across the stars… But I guess I traveled to a different world, alone." I admitted, reflecting on my past.
"You aren't alone now. I'm here for you..." Lloyd comforted.
"And how long will that last when things happen that I can't change?" I whispered.
"I love you as a sister Starlord… Nothing will ever stop that!" Lloyd reassured. I remained silent in response.
"Look, I know you're having all of these doubts, and that's exactly what I had… But in the end, everything will be worth it." Lloyd tried to cheer me up.
"I can only hope…" I sighed, and Lloyd put his hand on my shoulder. Eventually the mood lightened up, and we began to reminisce on all the humorous times of the past.
"Yeah, and remember Kai wanting to be the Green Ninja so bad?" Lloyd laughed. Well, he wasn't the only one who wanted to be the Green Ninja. That wouldn't be important until Possession of course, but the little things matter.
"And I remember you were quite the prankster when you were younger! Also, be a better liar. You suck at lying." I joked.
"Hey, I can't help it!" Lloyd poked back.
"Whatever you say…" I teased, and we continued walking until we reached a small side town. We were able to get a map, and see we were about a third of the way to Jamanakai. After we managed to set up the tent, we ate our rations.
"Not bad for being something that never rots." Lloyd complimented as we ate.
"I wholeheartedly agree. I've tasted a lot worse… Such as fries that don't mold because there are so many preservatives. Those are horrible." I spoke, eating happily.
"Yikes… Did you ever have any good food?" Lloyd asked in between bites.
"Oh yes! I was lucky my parents made me travel all around the world, so I've tasted a lot of food! I think the best I had was somewhere in the Czech Republic, it was chicken with potatoes… But it tasted amazing! There was no food like that place's food. How about you? Favorite food other than candy?" I wondered.
"I'm a fan of sushi and noodles, not really a beef and chicken supporter. I'll eat most everything, I just refuse a few vegetables here and there." Lloyd shrugged.
"Ah, I've always had a distaste for seafood. Came from my dad, he and I are sweet toothed people." I spoke, finishing my food.
"Really? Seafood is great, you can't just not like it!" Lloyd responded, shocked.
"You once hated vegetables. Everyone's got a specific taste. I'm just a fan of beef and chicken more." I retaliated.
"Well, you aren't wrong…" Lloyd pouted.
"I've faced down food conversations like this before, of course I'm right. After all, be happy if someone doesn't like all of the same food you do. It just means more for you!" I snubbed a little, it was nice to be a bit childish every once in awhile.
"Arrogant much?" Lloyd retaliated with an eyebrow raised.
"Come on, let me have a little childishness in my life! I'm still too young to be considered an adult, let alone someone who can be stoic all the time. If I were stoic all the time, then… It would be a lot easier than someone who smiles too much. There's too many people like that." I sighed. Being optimistic was not my strong point.
"What would smiling too much have to do with anything?" Lloyd asked, concern lacing his tone.
"Lloyd, there are so many things Ninjago has never faced. Your world is young, and the people are happy and content with everything! My world had so many places, opinions, and that caused a lot of issues. Words hurt more than you know, and so do actions. Sometimes, people do what I did successfully, and it's never nice to see." I sadly revealed, slowly giving away pieces of Earth's culture and issues. Lloyd remained silent.
"I shouldn't be telling you all of this should I? It must be such a shock to have to listen to what I say... " I trailed off, looking at the dark night sky.
"No, no! It's fine! You're right that it's a lot to take in, but it means you trust me, and that means a whole lot more to me." Lloyd comforted, and I looked at him.
It's really going to hurt if he leaves me again in the future. Why couldn't I have just stayed away? But whatever the consequences may be, he's family now, and he's my little brother.
"Thanks." I whispered quietly, and we soon headed in for the night, preparing for another day of walking.
"Wuss!" I laughed as we took a break halfway up the mountain where Jamanakai resided.
"How… Do… You… Do… This?" Lloyd panted out.
"Walking with a weight on your back and practice. After all, you're the ninja here, not me. I can't do all of your fancy flips and tricks. I just rely on bluffs and some elbow grease. Come on then, we're almost there!" I urged Lloyd on, and he slowly started to jog upwards. I jogged with him, I suppose that it had been a rough few days for him.
Towards the end, I dragged Lloyd up the hill, he was panting and looked extremely tired. I was still ready to move, as I had gotten used to walking long distance. Besides, I was surprised Lloyd was not used to high altitudes. After all, he did live on a flying boat.
"We're here! Let's go see if Vastu will be able to house us for tonight, and if not we still have my tent." I told Lloyd as the villagers stared at us. It seemed unlike the rest of Ninjago, Jamanakai citizens knew that I was with Lloyd, and they knew who I was. We walked up to Vastu's door, and Vastu answered.
"Oh! You're back! Please come in, it's been a while! I see you've also brought another guest. You are welcome to stay!" Vastu greeted kindly, inviting us both in. Together we stepped inside, and Lloyd collapsed on Vastu's couch.
"Sorry about that! He's not used to long distance walking, somehow. Say," I flicked Lloyd for being rude, "How have you been? I'd like to hear how the shop has been doing first, then I'll tell you about or most recent… Incidents." I nervously tried to goad Vastu into talking. I wasn't going to lie to him anytime soon, nor hide things well. He deserved to know everything, and I felt that covering things up badly would be… I don't know, somewhat trusting. It gave away how bad it would be, and whether he should pay attention or not.
"You're being obvious about something, tell me. You are only obvious to me when you did something big. Did you have another violence incident?" Vastu demanded answers, but he was certainly concerned.
"Well, uh, I'll start from when we arrived on the Dark Island. Long story short, I get captured by Garmadon, Lloyd breaks me out, the team gets into a fight about me, Kai gets angry and demands I tell him if I know the future, more fighting, and then Lloyd hesitates when I asked him if he was my brother because I swore at him," A gasp and disappointing glare from Vastu I tried to ignore, "Then Lloyd said I had to go home after everything, then I get all weird during the Final Battle, after that Lloyd leaves me a letter about how I have to go home, then I breakdown and go suicidal…" I meekly finished before Vastu shot up like a rocket.
"What! Did I hear that correctly? What were you thinking?" Vastu demanded, inspecting for injury.
"I-" I started, but was cut off by Vastu.
"No refusals! This is behavior even I did not expect! You could have died! You matter too much to do such a thing! You are now under house arrest, and you may only leave if I am with you!" Vastu ordered.
"Bu-" I tried again.
"No! You are the daughter I never had, and I cannot have you trying to kill yourself! Lloyd will also be your chaperone when I am not there, you hear? Becoming suicidal is not a joke, and I care about you too much to give you the opportunity to do it again!" Vastu explained loudly, and Lloyd nodded in agreement.
"Exactly, sis! You're worth too much to just die on us! We love you as family, there is no way we're going to let you go that easily!" Lloyd agreed, and I sighed.
"Gosh darn it." I complained, not enjoying the house arrest.
"You can still work, I understand it is a necessity for you. But you shall not leave this house without someone to watch you. You can tell me the details after dinner, both of you!" Vastu ordered.
"Alright." I hesitantly agreed.
"Of course..." Lloyd yawned.
"We should get him to bed." Vastu noted as he saw Lloyd drifting out of focus.
"It's been rough for him… Walking so far seems to have taken a toll." I simply replied, getting a tired and dizzy Lloyd off the couch. Vastu guided us to a room, and Lloyd passed out as soon as he hit the mattress face first. I had to admit, it was a bit funny, seeing Lloyd just fall asleep like that.
We shut the door behind him, and I walked with Vastu back to the living room.
"Oh, Myrana. What was going through your head? Suicide is not the answer for whatever you may be facing." Vastu pleaded, a concerned tone spreading throughout his voice.
"Well, Lloyd had told me on the Dark Island that I had to go home… I was heartbroken that my brother wanted to push me away, especially when I can't run the risk of everything falling apart. I had asked him if he were my brother, and he hesitated and didn't say anything! Gosh darn it he didn't say anything!" I weeped out, taking off my hood and trusting Vastu with all of my worries.
"I know it is tough for you, especially because you were raised differently. You have lived an entirely different way, and how you percieved our reality makes it even tougher for you. It's amazing that you are already able to do so much. It's just hard to imagine that you would go so far…" Vastu sighed as he hugged me fatherly.
"Well, I did get minor brain damage, so… I don't know. Mood swings will probably happen? I'm not sure. Besides, I'm still a kid so I can't exactly say I have the most stable and well thought out actions. It's just… I'm not exactly good at fitting in, or even just existing around here. I've messed up so much… And if I stay things will get bad, if I leave then it might be even worse. Heh. 'If I stay there will be trouble, if I go it will be double…'" I cried softly, desperately holding onto Vastu. He remained silent as we both sat hugging each other. Eventually we let go and headed into the kitchen for dinner.
"Hi guys. I don't think I properly introduced me earlier, I'm Lloyd. Your name is Vastu right?" Lloyd asked, still a bit unsure with Vastu's name.
"Yes it is. Nice to meet you Lloyd. Someone who is there for Starlord as often as I am is always welcome here. Dinner will be ready soon." Vastu replied, welcoming in Lloyd.
"Is there anything I can do to help prepare?" Lloyd offered, and I nodded.
"Erm, please take care of grabbing things from the cabinets please. I'm still too short, which is annoying." I huffed, and Lloyd laughed.
"We were all there once." He smiled, grabbing out plates and other table necessities.
"Of course tall people, of course... " I replied in good humor.
"I think it's ready!" Vastu pointed out, turning off his stove.
"Sweet!" I cheered, finalizing the table and other items in the kitchen. Soon enough, we were all laughing and chatting, eating with an air of a happy reunion and Lloyd as the new addition.
"LLOYD. STOP PUTTING STICKERS ON MY BLANKET! WHERE DO YOU EVEN GET THESE FROM?" I yelled at my brother, he kept messing around with my room, and put stickers on my blanket.
Vastu was a kind man and gave Lloyd his own room, and soon enough his room looked like a stereotypical green room filled with random trophies and posters. He didn't like the trophies though, he felt that there were too many. Lloyd would leave for a week about once every two months to get a bunch of trophies, but he ultimately decided to stay with me. It was because of my incident, and I know that none of them have forgotten about that. We still live happily, and there's even a poster of us as a family. Rahu works with us as well, but he has his own life. He's more of a family friend, rather than a family member.
It had been about two years since that incident. During that time, I forced Lloyd to mail the Ninja with me, so we stayed in contact. Kai never really talked to me, but I would write to him all the same. I didn't have time to hate or refuse to acknowledge him. Admittedly, once he found I had an email, he blocked me. The nice thing about snail mail is… You have to touch the letter! Nya apparently makes Kai read the letters, otherwise she reads it in front of everyone to him.
Zane was doing well, but he complained that his students were very rebellious in his class. Actually, everyone was complaining about them! I did try to give them advice, and some stuff worked, but not everything.
Vastu was still careful with me, but he lifted the house arrest not too long ago. He felt confident that I wouldn't go trying to jump off a cliff. We celebrated each other's birthdays, and I was given two blank journals by Vastu and some colorful pens from Lloyd on my last birthday. I'll admit I used the journals more often than the pens. I used one journal to write down as much as I could about humanity in English. Lloyd would ask me about it, but he needed me to read it to him if he wanted to know what was inside.
The second journal was about what I thought about Ninjago and Earth. It held all of my personal opinions, which I tried to keep out of the history journal. Of course, the two would sometimes stumble upon my writings, but they could never read it.
Walking to the computer we had, I checked my email.
Hey Starlord!
We got acceptance to have a field trip to Borg Industries! The students will like it for sure. We'd like to invite you to come with us if you want, and we'll let Borg know. It will be nice to see New Ninjago City, especially since the last time we saw it, it was in ruins. Sorry I have to cut this short, I have a busy class coming up soon.
-Nya
"LLOYD GET YOUR STUFF, WE'RE HEADED TO YOUR DAD'S PLACE!" I yelled, grabbing my pack and my stashes of money. I had raised a lot more money, I now had a solid six thousand Jyn. I left two thousand with Vastu, for security purposes. I took four thousand with me, and it was tucked away in my pack.
"Why?" Lloyd yelled back.
"IT'S TIME GREEN BEAN! LET'S GET MOVING!" I hastily replied, running over to his room to bother him.
It was time for another round of suffering and heroes.
This time… I don't expect I'll get such a happy ending. Nor for anything else until Day of the Departed.
Ninjago's destiny was going to throw it's worst at me.
And I'm not sure if I really am ready.
I hope I wrote that ending well enough, I wanted to make it good. Still, there's a lot more to go! I'm glad so many of you have enjoyed this, and I want to give a final THANK YOU for this book! I don't know what I would've done without you guys! Now, I'm off to continue writing the next book! See you all later!
Review, favorite, follow, share, whatever. HAVE A GREAT DAY!
