Author's note: this list is always here

Note #2: I do not own any characters or book series this is a fan fiction

Note#3 : character personalities and traits may slightly differ from their respective books this is a fan fiction.

Characters list:Today's characters: Warriors: Jayfeather, Bluestar, Tigerstar, scourge

GGH: Twilight, Otuhlissa

Sight:Fell, Morgra, Larka

Inheritance trilogy(eragon):Sapphira

Brightclaw and Mosshadow

P.S I gave up writing with Redwall characters as hosts.

Pre-show

Jayfeather, Fell, Otulissa, Twilight and Tigerstar are backstage. The camera and effects crew is there too. Mosshadow is watching.

Jayfeather: okay we have 30 minutes before the next episode start, but since you're just reading this we might show you want fans get for reviews!

Otuhlissa: absolutely, it would be highly time consuming if we were to go through every thing on stage! This is much more efficient.

Fell: you sound so nerdy.

Otuhlissa glares at Fell.

Jayfeather: and today's camera crew is Midnight, Coryn......( rambles off)

The crew leaves to their positions.

Mosshadow: and readers if you want to suggest things for future shows you can ask in a review for your fic to be interviewed.

Tigerstar: I wonder where that stupid wolf who shoots me a lot is.

Morgra and Larka enter.

Tigerstar: (sigh)

Larka: hi

Fell(her brother): hi! You're here as a guest host today?

Jayfeather(looks up from a sheet of paper): yeah, (cynically) Mosshadow thought it would be nice to have your girlfriend on stage, as long as we don't have long romance scenes.(snickers)

Every one gives Jayfeather a quizzical look.

Jayfeather: um, what?

Larka: I'm his sister!

Jayfeather: oops!(face palms)

Morgra and Fell: idiot!

Fell: but I love her of course!(licks Larka)

Mosshadow begins playing a love song on his violin.

Twilight: shut it mossy!

Mosshadow: fine!(grabs his guitar!)

Twilight: no! Not that either!

Mosshadow grabs a electronic keyboard!

Twilight: you know what I mean punk!

Mosshadow: did you just call me a punk! I am the author! You're just an owl!

Morgra: ooooo! Specism !

Tigerstar: I am going to get you for hurting me last episode! THIS IS SPARTA!(charges)

Morgra: um... okay thats great....(sidesteps)

Tigerstar knocks over several spare lights and a camera.

Jayfeather: as we were saying reviewers get prizes! Give me the crate.

Fell nudges a crate over to Jayfeather.

Jayfeather: um can you open this since I'm blind?

Fell: okay!

Fell rips the top off violently.

Morgra: ever heard of using the handle?

The rest of the cast comes in.

Bluestar: LOL !( acts happy and giddy)

Mosshadow: what's that bottle you have in your paw?

Bluestar: oh this ? These are happy pills!( unscrews lid and begins popping pills.)

Jayfeather(makes a call to security.): um hello this is code JF12 please detain and search code BS14 for suspected narcotics, section 5b!(puts down phone).

Several security guards jump Bluestar and grab her bottle of red colored pills.

Bluestar: NOO!! not my happiness. NO!!! ( the guards drag her away)

Jayfeather, Mosshadow, Otuhlissa and Fell crowd around the crate.

Mosshadow: when you review you get virtual plushies! ( he pulls out a plushie of a black cat with blue eyes) this is a Jayfeather plushie! And it plays cute sound clips when you squeeze the paw!( he presses gently on the paw)

Jayfeather plushie toy: Shut up and go away!(gets pressed again) ack! No duh I'm blind!

Jayfeather: grrr! Come on, do I talk like that?

Morgra: yes you do!

Mosshadow: don't tease him, I have one for you too!

Morgra: (gulp)

Mosshadow lifts a light gray wolf missing an ear up.

Mosshadow: like it?

Larka:cute.

Morgra makes a slit throat gesture to Mosshadow, but he does it any way.

Morgra plushie: Grrr I hate you! Go to Hell/I gonna kill you *bleep*/ Stupid cub eat this!( there is the sound of a wolf cub being slapped)

Mosshadow: and I think I better stop this right now so I can RUN AWAY!

Morgra chases the author out of the studio in a rage.

Jayfeather: um okay.... your aunt has some, anger management problems.(there is the sound of the author being violently beaten.)

Fell: tell me about it.

Brightclaw (randomly appears from another door): it's huggy time!

Everyone: OH NOOOOOOOOOO!

The camera being used to record this section shuts off.

Camera turns on again. Everyone is back.

Morgra: argh my ribs.....

Mosshadow: can't be any worse than falling off a bridge.

Morgra: just shut up! Wait ! How did you get here!? I shoved you out a window!

Mosshadow: authors are invincible sucker!

Morgra:why me?

Bluestar: I'm back!

Jayfeather: huh?

Bluestar: those were candy! I just had to many of them!

Jayfeather: okay.

Mosshadow: that good we need at least one reasonable, responsible, sane adult.

Tigerstar: hey I'm-

Brightclaw(cuts him off): no you're not and you suck.

Tigerstar: that hurt.

Morgra: I'm reasonable and responsible and -

Larka: no offense but nahhhhh.

Morgra:hey!

Mosshadow(grabs another plushie): continuing on plushies we have Sapphira the dragon plushies.

Brightclaw: oh you mean Eragon's dragon!

Scourge: why that plushie? We never had dragons on this show!Crash! (everyone turns around, a blue dragon has landed behind a pile of props.) OMG! AHHHHHHHHH!

Scourge runs towards a door and slams flat upon it since it was locked. He falls down unconscious.

Sapphira: hello little ones.

Mosshadow(calmly):hi glad you could make it.

Everyone else is stunned.

Bluestar: how'd you get in?!

Sapphira: retractable roof.

Above her a sliding panel has opened up. She takes up most of the space.

Morgra(suspiciously): so therefore you brought her here for a reason, something to do with the interview perhaps?

Otuhlissa: hmmmmm yes, it is rather suspicious.

Scourge(half unconscious): I got some coconuts and they pwn yo mama.(pauses) I'M TOO SEXY FOR THIS SHIRT! TOO SEXY FOR THIS.............

Twilight: what should we do.

Morgra leaps over to Scourge and bashes him with a heavy camera, he slumps fully out.

Larka: Morgra!

Morgra: oops so sorry, I think I might have screwed the hard drive.

Larka: no not that.

Morgra: well the lens is fine, not like I broke any thing. Why are you complaining?(evil smile)

Larka: (sigh)

Jayfeather: lets squeeze the plushie already.

----------------------------------------A few more minutes of plushie squeezing---------------------------------

Jayfeather: 10 minutes to go time to get on stage.

Brightclaw: yay(hugs Larka) you're so cute and fluffy!

Larka: um thanks.... my ribs.....

Meanwhile in the tech booth.......................................................

Lyze: while I was checking the security cameras I noticed that Jayfeather's sister Hollyleaf was there near the camera and electrical systems.

Midnight: hmm not good.

Lionblaze: she wouldn't be doing anything wrong though it is suspicious.

Back to the stage.........................

Jayfeather: hello and welcome to Jayfeather talk! Today we will be interviewing several other fanfictions.

Audience: (CHEERS)

Bluestar: okay and we are interviewing Brightheart from the fanfiction A scarred face and a torn heart by Liza Taylor. Then we'll talk to Angelpaw from the fic Amnesia by Details Matter.

Harry Potter(in the crowd): BY THE WAY THANKS FOR GETTING MY WAND BACK FROM EDWARD!

Mosshadow: your welcome. I hope everyone who reads this dislikes Twilight as much as I do!

Jayfeather: and now we shall read reviews!

Twilight pulls out an envelope.

Twilight: and we have 3 review from Night-shimmer who co writes Twisted Reality that we plan to interview later this season. Him or her review is mostly about running from Morgra who has a gun.... I'll skip the first two the last says your good at this. Thanks.

Mosshadow: thanks I really appreciate that.

Mosshadow tosses a Morgra, Jayfeather, and Sapphira plushies to Night-Shimmer, they fall out of Night's computer and bop Night in the forehead. Brightclaw follows to give Night a hug but gets threatened with a hunting rifle. She runs back to the fanfiction quickly.

Brightclaw: well that reviewer doesn't like my awesome hugs!

Morgra: no one likes your hugs!..... OMG DONT HUG ME-(gets bear hugged)!

Brightclaw: thats what you get *bleep*.

Jayfeather: and next is.......

-----------------Author skips what happens next--------------------------------------------------------------------

A quick thanks from the author.

To Arius Winter: thanks !

Silverstorm of Riverclan: sure, I have enrichment classes but I'll try.

Hockey10: yes sure, he's freaky though. (Fantasizes about Morgra torturing the *bleep* out of him) and I just foreshadowed!

Nightmist88: well she's here!Finally a sight fan! She would have been here in episode 3 but I changed it.

Silverwing:thanks.....

Dsrox: was that you earlier as Wildheart? The crazy cat from your fic?

Wolfstar4: sure.... however I am a little backed up by at least 5 more.

And you all get lots of plushies! Plus a Otuhlissa one that tells you random nerdy scientific equations!

---------------------End random comment----------------------------------------------------------------------------

(song dedications have been skipped) (you can send in song dedications)

Mosshadow: wow thats a lot of song dedications my violin needs a new E string.

Bluestar: what ever.

Tigerstar: gimme a espresso Mossy!

Mosshadow: um okay...

Fell: gasp! Mosshadow didn't argue... suspicious!

Larka: nahh.

Brightclaw: now time for calls! Morgra! Twilight!

Morgra(gets up from ground):can't talk, ribs hurt too... much .. argh...(faints and her head lands in a cup of hot tea that Mosshadow had been drinking and set down while getting Tiggy's coffee)AHHH DAMMIT! Sonova …..(gets ticked off dangerous look).

Twilight : and our first caller is from Romania so we all know who that's for !

Caller: (Russian guy accent)hey Fell, can I hook up with your Girlfriend Tarla? I am much cooler than you!

Fell: um what!

Caller: this is Vladimir , I have recently moved and I need a girl and yours is hot so ….

Fell: HOW DARE YOU *BLEEP* I BEAT THE LIVING *BLEEP* OUTA YOUR SORRY *BLEEPING* HIDE , YOU BETTER WATCH OUT LITTLE *BLEEP*.

Fell angrily dashes off stage and through the doors to bash up some Russian wolf who's trying to get his girl.

Larka: sigh.

Mosshadow: here's your coffee.

Tiggy: yes!(drinks it all down) Ohh yeah baby now I'm caffinated! Yeah!

Brightclaw: before we continue me and Mossy are going to have A MICHAEL JACKSON TRIBUTE! YAHOOOO!

Mosshadow: stop calling me mossy! And when was I going to dance Beat it with you?

Brightclaw: right now! (grabs her co-author and they dance while she sings)( Twilight and Larka are chorus)

They told him don't you ever come around here
Don't wanna see your face, you better disappear
The fire's in their eyes and their words are really clear
So beat it, just beat it

You better run, you better do what you can
Don't wanna see no blood, don't be a macho man
You wanna be tough, better do what you can
So beat it, but you wanna be bad

Just beat it, beat it, beat it, beat it
No one wants to be defeated
Showin' how funky and strong is your fight
It doesn't matter who's wrong or right
Just beat it, beat it
Just beat it, beat it
Just beat it, beat it
Just beat it, beat it

They're out to get you, better leave while you can
Don't wanna be a boy, you wanna be a man
You wanna stay alive, better do what you can
So beat it, just beat it

You have to show them that you're really not scared
You're playin' with your life, this ain't no truth or dare
They'll kick you, then they beat you,
Then they'll tell you it's fair
So beat it, but you wanna be bad

Just beat it, beat it, beat it, beat it
No one wants to be defeated
Showin' how funky and strong is your fight
It doesn't matter who's wrong or right

Just beat it, beat it, beat it, beat it
No one wants to be defeated
Showin' how funky and strong is your fight
It doesn't matter who's wrong or right

Just beat it, beat it, beat it, beat it
No one wants to be defeated
Showin' how funky and strong is your fight
It doesn't matter who's wrong or right
Just beat it, beat it
Beat it, beat it, beat it

Beat it, beat it, beat it, beat it
No one wants to be defeated
Showin' how funky and strong is your fight
It doesn't matter who's wrong or who's right

Just beat it, beat it, beat it, beat it
No one wants to be defeated
Showin' how funky and strong is your fight
It doesn't matter who's wrong or right

Just beat it, beat it, beat it, beat it
No one wants to be defeated
Showin' how funky and strong is your fight
It doesn't matter who's wrong or right
Just beat it, beat it
Beat it, beat it, beat it

Beat it, beat it, beat it, beat it
No one wants to be defeated
Showin' how funky and strong is your fight
It doesn't matter who's wrong or who's right

Just beat it, beat it, beat it, beat it
No one wants to be defeated
Showin' how funky and strong is your fight
It doesn't matter who's wrong or right

Just beat it, beat it, beat it, beat it
No one wants to be defeated
Showin' how funky and strong is your fight
It doesn't matter who's wrong or right

Just beat it, beat it, beat it, beat it
No one wants to be defeated
Just beat it, beat it
Beat it, beat it, beat it

(lights flash and strobe)

Brightclaw: now that was fun wasn't it!

Mosshadow: gasp....(faints)

Larka: ha hah ha!

Tigerstar : I feel strange... as if someone put an epically large overdose of laxatives in the coffee! Oh no ! AHHH WHERES THE DIRT PLACE I NEED TO GO!

He runs frantically off stage and into the back area! Unfortunately he apparently doesn't make it as there is a large explosion!

Scourge: ooooo.... that not good.

Janitor(pops out from a door): do I get extra for cleaning up Tiggy's remains?

----------------------------------------a few minutes later-------------------------------------------------------------

Jayfeather: and our next caller is.... umm.... PlayTom magazine! And it's for Scourge!

Caller: Hi Scourge we would like to note that you are due right now for immediate stripping and posing!

Scourge: hallelujah! I love to strip in front of cameras! (Runs off to PlayTom headquarters.)

Sapphira:ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ.....

Jayfeather: and now we are severly running off schedule since it's Page 10 already! Bring in Brightheart!

Brightheart(poofs out of nowhere): hi !

Jayfeather: hi!

Bluestar: hi !

Larka: hello!

Sapphira:yawn!

Morgra: shut up.

Otuhlissa: salutations!

Twilight: yo what up my man!

Jayfeather: we are talking about your role in A Scarred Face and A Torn heart.

Larka: you sure killed lot of cats.

Brightheart: aww come on! Why would I do that?

The other Brightheart inside Brightheart's head: just stall this stupid author can't get anything out of us. Soon we'll be back to cause more havoc and destroy that lame kitty pet!

Morgra: because it says so in the fanfiction!

Brightheart: um......

Bluestar: you're becoming so evil, Star Clan is not happy!

Twilight: any body want Pop tarts?

Sapphira; sure!

Brightheart: AHHH! WHAT THE HELL!

Jayfeather: oh she just here for an episode.

Mosshadow: so in the fanfiction you just murdered Sol and Sandstorm has confided in you that she thinks someone in ThunderClan is doing the killing.

Larka: and you're becoming darker and darker. More deaths are being added to the list soon.

Brightheart: so! I NEVER HAD AN APPRENTICE BECAUSE FIRESTAR IS SUCH A*BLEEPING**BLEEPOT* YOU ALL HAVE SUCH PERFECT LIVES ALL HAPPY IN STARCLAN OR AS A MEDIECENE CAT OR WHERE EVER YOU LIVE! YOU'RE ALL SO LUCKY!!!!!

Jayfeather: woah that was a surprise!

Morgra: what do you mean your life sucks! Ever seen mine !?

Brightheart: shut up! I hate you all!

The other Brightheart: what was that you idiot!

Brightheart: sob sob … she's taking over me ! Sob I can't take it! Sob sob.

She runs off stage !

Bluestar: what just happened ?

Angelpaw: why hi. (evil smile)

Larka: I'm not liking that smile.

Morgra: I'm going over to Yellowfang's den to play Halo co-op!

Larka: what!

Morgra: see ya!(runs off stage to play Xbox with Yellowfang. )

Angelpaw: MU HA HAH HA HHA H AH HHA ! Less targets to destroy! It is time for me to start my plan for world domination! Ha hah ha ha!

Everyone: huh?

Angelpaw: I shall kill you for no reason other than that Mosshadow needs to move the plot forward!

Larka: traitor!

Mosshadow: sorry.

Angelpaw: ha ha !

She suddenly attacks Bluestar with her demonic magic!

Bluestar( poofs into a bunny); ahhh!

Twilight : oh *bleep*.

Otuhlissa: heck yeah!

Morgra(comes back): hey guys Yellowfang's Xbox is broken! Any one got a PS3?

Larka: OmiGOD help us!

Morgra: okay... hey look this grenade launcher is randomly lying here maybe I should use it.

Twilight: um sure!(draws ice sword) die !(gets blown up!)

Sapphira: ( breathes fire on Angelpaw)

Angelpaw: ha ha ! I eat fire!(sucks in all of the fire ! And gets drunk) um ha ha hh....

She staggers around drunkly.

Morgra: how bout I just shoot her already!

Jayfeather: sure!

Morgra: DIE!!! HA HA !(begins firing!) MU HA HA HA !

Angelpaw(drunkenly): ah gonna killa youa! (gets blown up by a grenade) ack nooo! I'll be evil and murder tons of people for no reason.

Fanfiction ends for no reason because Morgra began shooting the cameras in her bloodlust!

Larka(in the dark): sigh..... review people..... and vote for the poll on the profile page... STOP SHOOTING ALREADY!

Hollyleaf: darn I was going to blow up the electric room... must wait until next episode to be evil!