Wells was dead.
I hadn't known him very well, but something about the way he'd died shook me to the core. Tim had found him in the early hours of the day, lying face down in a pool of his own blood at the bottom of the grave he'd been digging for Atom. Bellamy had tried to hide the body before Clarke could see it but he was too late. Her scream had echoed throughout the camp and I could only watch as she threw herself at Wells, trying to revive him. But he was long gone.
There had been no trace, no clue to lead us back to the killers. The Grounders had gotten him less than ten yards away from camp, quick and silent. We were all terrified, Charlotte especially. She barely slept and spent the day working in silence, a haunted look in her eyes. She wouldn't speak to me, could barely even look at me. She was so young. Too young to see things like that. I had finished her bow but she didn't even touch it.
Bellamy had decided everyone was to remain in camp. That meant no hunting for me. I was only allowed to check the traps, never alone and always armed. We were all on edge. The only silver lining was that everyone had gotten to work. Some built the wall, others carved spears…everyone was busy and no one was complaining.
I was coming back from the woods with Amara, having just set up new traps when Clarke ran past us, knocking into another kid without a care. Exchanging a look, we followed her. She headed straight for Murphy.
'You son of a bitch!' she yelled as she pushed him roughly.
'Hey, what's your problem?' he asked, laughing.
'Recognize this?' Clarke said. She was holding a knife that had obviously been made of metal from the dropship.
'It's my knife, where'd you find that?' He tried to take it from her but she took a step back.
'Where you dropped it after you killed Wells!'
Around them, whispers broke out. I didn't understand. Hadn't Grounders killed Wells? But then, if Murphy had done it, it explained why there were no tracks leading away from camp. The killer had come from within. And it was no secret the two hated each other. But still. Murphy wasn't an idiot. Why would he have dropped the knife? Even if he hadn't meant to, he would have come back for it.
'Where I what?' he asked.
Bellamy, Octavia and Jasper joined the group that had formed around the two. I shot Bellamy a questioning look but he just shook his head.
'The Grounders killed Wells, not me,' Murphy defended himself.
'I know what you did, and you're gonna pay for it.'
'Really? Bellamy, you believe this crap?' Murphy asked, clearly looking for support. But Bellamy didn't say anything.
'You threatened to kill him!' Clarke insisted. 'We all heard you. You hated Wells.'
'Plenty of people hated Wells. His father was the Chancellor that locked us up.'
'Yeah, but you're the only one that got into an actual fight with him!'
'I didn't kill him then either.'
'He tried to kill Jasper too,' Octavia said suddenly. That was news to me, and apparently, to Jasper as well.
The air was thick with tension and Murphy seemed to realize the crowd was turning against him. I knew without a doubt this was going to get ugly. I searched for Charlotte. She looked terrified and I made my way towards her, pushing people out of the way.
'Come on, this is ridiculous,' Murphy was saying. 'I don't have to answer to you, I don't have to answer to anyone!'
'Come again?' Bellamy said.
I reached Charlotte and pulled her against me. The crowd was getting restless. A lot of them had weapons in their hands and were looking at Murphy with hatred in their eyes. He walked to Bellamy but I couldn't hear what they said to each other. I pulled on Charlotte's hand.
'We have to go,' I told her. 'Come on.'
She wouldn't budge, as if paralysed.
'Is this the kind of society we want?' Clarke asked the crowd. 'You say there should be no rules. Does that mean that we can kill each other without punishment?'
'I already told you,' Murphy protested. 'I didn't kill anyone.'
'I say we float him!' Connor yelled.
'Oh God…' I whispered. This was going to get really bad, really fast and I knew I had to get out of there. It was a coward's choice, but at the moment I couldn't care less.
'Charlotte, come on!' I begged. I pulled on her arm but she dug her heels in the ground, staying put.
'That's not what I'm saying,' Clarke told Connor.
'Why not? He deserves to float. It's justice.'
'Revenge isn't justice!'
'It's justice. Float him!'
The crowd started chanting, led by Connor. Murphy, realizing his life was in danger, tried to run but someone tripped him. He crashed to the ground and people rushed to get to him. Someone knocked into me and I lost my grip on Charlotte's arm. By the time I turned around, she was gone. I yelled her name but there was so much noise, it was useless. Everyone was shouting, whether it was insults or protests. They pulled Murphy up and I could see they'd gagged him. They were going to kill him.
They led him out of camp and I was pulled with the crowd, trying to get a glimpse of Charlotte. Clarke was screaming, begging them to let him go but no one was listening to her. After days of fear, tension and stress, it was no wonder they broke. And they needed a scapegoat. The right thing to do would have been trying to save Murphy. But as it turned out, I wasn't as brave as I thought I was. I didn't have the courage to face the crowd, too scared to get hurt, and so I ignored Murphy's muffled cries of pain as they put a rope around his neck and pulled him up, his feet barely able to find purchase on a crate. I finally saw Charlotte next to Octavia and Bellamy and ran towards her. Her eyes were wide with fear. Clarke ran to Bellamy, and I watched as she begged him to stop them.
'They'll listen to you!' she shouted.
'Bellamy!' Connor called. 'You should do it!'
The crowd chanted his name and in the commotion, our eyes locked. I shook my head, silently asking him to stop it. This wasn't right. This wasn't justice. It was murder.
'I saw you in the woods with Atom!' Clarke told him. 'I know you're not a killer. Bellamy, don't do this. Don't do this.'
He looked at her. Looked at Octavia, and at me. He pushed his way toward Murphy. And kicked the crate.
Clarke screamed. So did Charlotte. I could only watch as Murphy dangled from the rope under the crowd's cheers. I could have pushed my way to the rope, cut it with my knife, did something, anything to stop this monstrosity. But I stayed frozen, gripping Charlotte's hand.
'What the hell are you doing?' someone yelled.
It was Finn. I hadn't even realized he wasn't there with us.
'Cut him down!' he shouted, before turning to me. 'Y/N, get Charlotte out of here, now!'
I snapped out of my trance and pulled Charlotte with me. She tried to fight it but Octavia helped me and we started pushing her away from the scene.
'Just stop, okay!' she screamed, shoving me. 'Murphy didn't kill Wells. I did!'
The world stopped turning. I could hear people shouting, and the sound of a body hitting the ground but I only had eyes for Charlotte. She looked on the verge of tears but I couldn't bring myself to comfort her, like I would have usually done. It wasn't possible. She couldn't have killed Wells. She was Charlotte, my sweet and brave Charlotte, who had surprised me with arrows and couldn't stand to watch as I killed rabbits. She was a kid. Just a twelve-year-old kid.
Her eyes met mine and I saw overwhelming guilt there, as well as heart-wrenching pain. How could I have missed this? Bellamy approached and put a hand on her shoulder.
'We have to go,' he said. She nodded silently and looked at me. I followed without a word. Bellamy led us to a tent, where we were quickly followed by Clarke and Finn. Charlotte was staring at me, tears rolling down her cheeks. I didn't know what to say to her. She was a murderer. She had said so herself. And yet, there was no denying the fact that I loved her like a sister, I had since I'd met her. And I knew some part of it was my fault. She was my responsibility and I had failed her. I hadn't seen the signs. I was as much to blame as she was.
'Charlotte, why?' Bellamy asked.
'I was just trying to slay my demons like you told me.'
Bellamy looked as if he'd been slapped. I remembered the cave, the advice he'd given her. Everything had gone wrong, and for a moment, I wished we were back in there, trapped by the acid fog. We would do things differently, Charlotte wouldn't kill Wells and everything would be fine.
'What the hell is she talking about?' Clarke asked.
'She misunderstood me. Charlotte, that is not what I meant.'
Outside, Murphy started shouting. Of course, he had rallied the crowd to him and was now looking for revenge.
'Bring the girl out, Bellamy!'
Charlotte flinched and looked at me.
'Please don't let them hurt me…'
'They won't hurt you,' I said without hesitation. In the face of her fear, I forgot about Wells, forgot about Murphy, forgot everything except Charlotte. 'Nothing bad will happen to you. I promise.'
She sobbed and I pulled her into my arms, hugging her tightly.
'If you guys have any bright ideas, speak up,' Bellamy asked Finn and Clarke.
They looked at each other and didn't say anything.
'Now you stay quiet?' Bellamy scoffed.
'Hey, those are your boys out there!' Finn said.
'This is not my fault!' Bellamy protested, before looking at Clarke. 'If she'd listened to me, those idiots would still be building the wall.'
'You wanna build a society, Princess?' Murphy yelled from outside the tent. 'Let's build a society. Bring her out!'
'No, please, Bellamy!' Charlotte cried.
He leaned down and put his hands on her arms, looking at her reassuringly.
'Look, Charlotte, hey. It's gonna be okay. Just stay with Y/N. She'll keep you safe.'
He looked at me and I nodded firmly. He then slipped out of the tent. I immediately sprang into action. Pulling out my knife, I slashed the tent so we had a way to the woods without being seen by the crowd. In complete silence, I took Charlotte's hand and pulled her in the forest, followed by Clarke and Finn.
Behind us, Murphy was shouting but I focused on getting us as far away from him as possible.
'Don't step in the mud,' I told them. 'Try not to leave any tracks they could follow.'
Charlotte was shaking beside me and I squeezed her hand.
'Do you trust me?' I asked.
She nodded, tears in her eyes.
'Then trust me when I say you'll be fine. Okay?'
We had barely walked for an hour when I suddenly heard someone shouting. Mike and Liam had found us and they had spears in their hands. I knew we couldn't outrun them and I took a decision immediately.
'Take her,' I said to Finn and Clarke. 'Keep her safe. I'll hold them off.'
'Y/N, no!' Charlotte sobbed.
'I'll find you', I told her softly before turning back to Mike and Liam. I heard the others start running behind me but I stayed focused on the boys. I tried to look as threatening as I could, which wasn't easy without my bow.
'Get out of the way, Y/N. We don't want to hurt you.'
'Then go away.'
Mike smirked and attacked with the butt end of the spear. It smacked painfully against my ribs but before he could draw back, I gripped the spear and pulled violently. He had been careless and when he lost his grip, the metal end cut his palm deeply.
'You bitch!' he cursed.
'Leave,' I said once again but this time, I was armed.
'Come on, Y/N,' Liam begged. 'We just want the girl. It's justice.'
'Screw your justice.'
'Alright. You asked for it.'
They both ran forward. I swung with the spear and hit Mike in the head but Liam was already there and he knocked me to the ground. Furious, I kicked my leg up and got him in the knee. I heard a satisfying crack but before I could get up, Mike had landed a blow in my ribs. I gasped from the pain, and he kicked me again, in the head this time. He went for a third time when suddenly, a branch smacked into his head. I immediately got up, ignoring the sharp pain in my chest and kneed Liam in the stomach. He doubled over and I hit him as hard as I could in the head. He collapsed to the ground, unconscious. I wiped the blood off my mouth and turned, not surprised to see Bellamy there.
'You okay?' he asked.
'I'm fine,' I said. In truth, I was pretty sure my ribs were bruised and my head was killing me but I didn't have any time to lose. Not when Charlotte's life was on the line.
'Charlotte is with Finn and Clarke,' I told Bellamy. 'We have to find them.'
I had to admit, Finn was good at covering his tracks. The fight with Mike and Liam had only lasted a few minutes but it was long enough for them to disappear. Bellamy and I walked for hours, but as it got darker and darker, I was getting desperate.
'Y/N,' Bellamy called. 'Y/N, you have to slow down.'
'I can't.'
He seized my arm, stopping me in my tracks. Furious, I shoved him.
'What the hell? Don't you get what is happening here? If Murphy finds her first, he'll kill her. We can't slow down, not until she's safe!'
'I know that,' he said softly. He put his hands on my arms, looking at me straight in the eyes. 'Trust me, I want to find her just as much as you. But I'm gonna need you to calm down, all right?'
I took a deep breath, realizing he was right. Anger would only blind me and keep me from finding her.
'Better?' Bellamy asked with a smile.
I nodded and he squeezed my arms. We set off again, more slowly. I don't know how long we walked until we heard a branch snap. Crouching behind some bushes in case it was Murphy, we carefully looked between the leaves.
It was Charlotte but as I was about to run to her, Bellamy stopped me. He gestured behind us and my eyes widened when I saw torches. Murphy was near. Silently, we ran towards Charlotte and Bellamy grabbed her. She screamed and he shushed her, putting a hand on her mouth.
'Charlotte!' I whispered. 'It's us, calm down.'
I saw the relief in her eyes, and something else I didn't recognize. Murphy and his friends were getting closer and I took Charlotte's hand, leading her away. Bellamy kept an eye on our surroundings, following closely.
'You have to let me go,' she said softly.
'What? No, why the hell would I do that?'
'Y/N, please. Let me go.'
I shook my head, bewildered. Charlotte sighed. And then, she started screaming. Bellamy jumped, putting a hand on her mouth again but even then, it wasn't enough.
'Charlotte, what are you doing?' I whispered. 'Shut up, they'll hear you!'
She managed to get out of Bellamy's grasp and tried to run away but I caught her.
'Let me go!' she shouted.
'We're trying to help you!' Bellamy said.
'I'm not your sister!' she said. 'Just stop helping me!'
I flinched, hurt. She's lashing out, I thought. She doesn't mean it.
'I'm over here!' she screamed and I cursed. We didn't have time for this.
'Are you trying to get us all killed?' Bellamy asked.
'Just go, okay? I'm the one they want!'
'Look,' I said, leaning down and grabbing her shoulders. 'I get it. You feel guilty about Wells and you want to get punished. But this isn't the way. I will die before I let them hurt you. You hear me?'
Charlotte breathed in sharply, a tear rolling down her cheek.
'I deserve to die,' she said and the pain in her voice broke me. Bellamy turned her towards him, his eyes boring into hers.
'Okay, Charlotte, listen to me. I won't leave you. Y/N won't leave you.'
'Please, Bellamy.'
I tried pulling her away again but she broke out of our grasp once more, running towards Murphy. Bellamy seized her and put her over his shoulder. She started screaming once more, ignoring my pleas.
'Run,' I said. We went as quickly as we could, weaving through the trees but Murphy was gaining on us and Charlotte never stopped screaming. I gripped my stolen spear tightly. Suddenly, Bellamy stopped and I almost knocked into him. I looked around him and cursed. We had reached a cliff, so high we couldn't even see the bottom. We were trapped between Murphy and the edge. He set Charlotte down and I pushed her behind me as Murphy and his friends broke the tree line.
'Bellamy!' he said. 'You cannot fight all of us. Give her up.'
'Maybe not. But I guarantee I'll take a few of you with me.'
Suddenly, Clarke and Finn ran in. She saw Charlotte behind me and breathed a sigh of relief.
'This has gone too far,' she said to Murphy. 'Just calm down. We'll talk about this.'
Murphy looked at her, then Charlotte. Suddenly, he grabbed Clarke and held her against his chest, a knife to her throat. I raised my spear but he looked at me threateningly.
'Don't even think about it, Y/N. And Finn, back off.'
'No, please. Please don't hurt her!' Charlotte cried behind me.
'Don't hurt her?' Murphy scoffed, looking at the young girl. 'Okay, I'll make you a deal. You come with me right now, I will let her go.'
I grabbed Charlotte's arm with my free hand, keeping her behind me. She tried to fight me to get to Murphy and Bellamy took her other arm, helping me.
'Don't do it, Charlotte!' Clarke begged.
'No!' she screamed. 'No, I have to!'
'Stop!' Bellamy ordered and miraculously, she seemed to listen. He let her go, focusing on the others. I didn't let go of her arm, though. I was too scared she'd try to run to Murphy.
'Murphy,' Bellamy said. 'This is not happening.'
'I can't let any of you get hurt anymore,' Charlotte said softly. 'Not because of me. Not after what I did.'
'Don't say that,' I answered, turning back to face her. I cupped her face between my hands. 'Everything will be fine, you'll see. This is a messed up situation, but we'll figure it out together, all right? Like we always do.'
She smiled, tears rolling down her cheeks, and hugged me. I closed my eyes, holding her tight and kissed her temple. At that moment, I truly believed everything would turn out fine. Murphy would give up and we'd go back to camp. Charlotte would make amends her entire life for what she'd done to Wells but she would be alive, and she'd get better. Life would go back to normal, or as normal as it could.
And then, she shoved me away. Too surprised to catch myself, I crashed into Bellamy and looked up, just in time to see Charlotte throwing herself off the cliff.
The scream I let out was inhuman. I scrambled forward, falling to my knees on the edge of the cliff, staring at the abyss beneath me.
'We have to get down there!' I said frantically, looking at Bellamy. 'She might be hurt, she needs our help.'
He didn't answer and stared at me, tears in his eyes.
'Bellamy, come on!' I begged, grabbing his arm and shaking him. 'We have to go, we have to help her!'
'Y/N,' he said and his voice was weaker than I'd ever heard it. 'She's gone.'
'No, she's not, she's waiting for us, come on.'
'She's dead, Y/N.'
Without thinking, I slapped him. I was breathing hard, anger blinding me. How could he say that? Charlotte trusted him, I trusted him. Why did he refuse to help her?
'Fuck you!' I shouted. 'She's not dead! She can't be!'
Fine. If he wouldn't help me, I'd get to her myself. I tried to get up, intending to find a way to the bottom off the cliff but Bellamy grabbed me, crushing me against his chest. I fought him, pummelling his chest with my fists. I tried to kick him, bite him, do anything to get out of his grasp but he held on, grunting as my hits landed.
'Let me go!' I tried to scream but my voice broke. Something terrible had just happened, but I wouldn't believe it. I couldn't. If I did, there was no turning back. Over Bellamy's shoulder, I looked at the bottom of the ravine. It was so deep. Too deep.
'Oh God,' I choked. 'Oh God, Charlotte.'
In my mind, the image of her jumping off the cliff played on a loop. And finally, I couldn't lie to myself anymore. No one could have survived that fall.
I broke down and Bellamy tightened his hold on me. I sobbed violently, choking on my own tears as I struggled to breathe. She was gone. Charlotte was gone and I felt so alone. What was I supposed to do? What was the point of me being here if I couldn't take care of her?
'I'm sorry…' I sobbed. 'I'm so sorry!'
I don't know how long I cried, crushed against Bellamy's chest, my mind a mess of grief and pain. But I felt it when he let me go. I had no tears left to shed and I just stared at the abyss in silence, feeling numb. I heard Bellamy yelling and turned slightly. He was holding Murphy down, beating him to a pulp.
Good, I thought. He deserves it.
Minutes or maybe hours later for all I cared, Bellamy came back to me and grabbed my arm, pulling me up. I didn't fight it. He led me back to camp, in complete silence, his hand never leaving my back and I almost felt like laughing. What was he afraid of? That I was going to throw myself off a cliff too?
The others were waiting for us, in complete silence. They saw Bellamy's bloody knuckles and Murphy's absence. They saw Charlotte wasn't there either. No one asked any question and I was grateful.
'Do you want to go back to your tent?' Bellamy asked me quietly.
I shook my head. I would never step foot in there again. The memories were too painful. Bellamy nodded and led me to his tent instead. He was sharing it with Octavia but she wasn't inside, something I was relieved to see. I sat down, looking around me. Of course he'd have the biggest tent in camp.
'There's nothing left to eat,' Bellamy said quietly. 'But I could get you water if you want.'
I shook my head wordlessly.
'You can sleep here tonight,' he added.
When I still didn't answer, he turned around to leave. But I had one thing I needed to say.
'It's not your fault.'
My voice was hoarse and barely audible but he froze, looking back at me.
'You couldn't have known she'd take your advice like this,' I continued. 'You didn't do anything wrong.'
He took a deep breath and sat down next to me.
'Didn't I?' he answered. 'I gave her a fucking knife, Y/N.'
'And I gave her a bow. But that's not the point. The point is, she was troubled from the start. There was nothing you could have done.'
And if anyone's to blame, it's me, I thought. I should have seen it coming.
Bellamy didn't answer. I was about to insist when I suddenly felt a sharp pain coming from my wristband. I yelped and grabbed my wrist, wincing.
'What is it?' Bellamy asked.
'I- I don't know. Something's wrong with my wristband.'
I looked closer and saw that it had gone dark. My heart sinking, I jumped to my feet and ran outside. All those who had kept their wristbands were looking at them. Each was as dark as mine.
It wasn't hard to understand. Our last mean of communication from the Ark was gone.
'Looks like you got what you wanted,' I said to Bellamy as he joined me. 'They think we're all dead.'
I went back to his tent so he wouldn't see the tears in my eyes. The Ark would think we'd all died due to radiations. They wouldn't come down to Earth, and they would die from lack of oxygen, including my own family.
And there was nothing I could do about it. Once again, I had failed.
