Pick Me, Choose Me, Love Me
Hermione woke the next morning on the long Gryffindor couch, Ron was sprawled on his back against the lounge chair that Harry was sleeping in, mouth slightly open. She sat up, stretched, and let herself smile at her friends. They really were the loves of her life, and she had no doubt she would continue to fall in love with the both of them for the rest of her life.
Harry woke next; opening his eyes slowly he reached groggily for his glasses on the end table beside Hermione. She grabbed them for the visually challenged boy and he accepted them with a smile.
"Morning." He said with a sleepy smile.
"Morning." She replied, happy to see another morning with him.
"I should tell you," he said slowly, "I had a little chat with Malfoy last night. I honestly think he might be genuine after all."
Hermione narrowed her eyes. "What did you say, exactly?"
"Nothing much." Harry said with a shrug. "We just…you know, cleared the air a little. Considering we have yet to talk in our entire lives without wanting to hit one another, I think it went rather well. He said I was the lucky one, no one expected me to destroy the world, and in a very twisted sort of way, I understood where he was coming from. Whether people expect you to destroy or save the world, it's a lot of pressure no matter how you look at it."
Hermione felt her heart lighten considerably, and she was really quite unsure why. She knew deep down that this war could not be won without Draco's help, but there was something more. She felt that there was some deeper desire within her that Harry be okay with Draco.
Ron was finally stirring as Harry and Hermione continued to talk.
"Where's Jess?" Were the first words out of his mouth.
Hermione giggled. "She's in their room, I'm sure she'll be down soon.
No sooner had she said it, Jared and Jessica walked down the stairs from the dorm rooms above.
"Morning." The chorused.
"Ready for breakfast?" Ron asked, always thinking with his stomach.
The five teenagers laughed, then continued together to the Great Hall.
As soon as Draco entered the Great Hall for breakfast, he scanned the room for Hermione. He saw her sitting at the Gryffindor table, surrounded by her friends. His insides twitched a bit, feeling left out. He was always the outsider looking in on others lives. He never really minded before, he knew his life was set, and he had no interest in it. He always kept himself occupied by looking in on others, he would make up stories about his classmates, where they came from, what their dreams and aspirations where. Up until a very short time ago he figured his life was going to revolve around crushing those dreams and aspirations, but recently he wanted nothing more than to have some of his own. He was hoping that it wasn't too off base. Even more strangely, his mind often wandered to Hermione. He couldn't shake the feeling that there was something more than just wanting to take Voldemort down. Sure, Voldemort was half the reason his entire existence was horrible, but part of him still felt aloof to the fate of the muggle world. He still really didn't give a damn whether all the muggles lived or died, but he cared about Hermione, and he cared about the muggles that she cared about. What has happened to him?
Hermione caught Draco's eye as he stood scanning the Great Hall. In a second she made a decision that shocked everyone present.
"Draco! Come sit with us!"
As expected, the entire student body turned from the Gryffindor table to the blonde boy standing in the doorway. Hufflepuffs, Ravenclaws, Slytherin's, Gryffindor's, and the entire long table of teachers stopped in mid conversation or mid bite and watched what went on before them.
Draco froze for a moment, aware of hundreds of eyes directed at him. He was never one to falter under pressure however, and as calmly as he could, he headed to the Gryffindor table and sat himself directly beside Hermione.
Almost immediately furious whispers started in all around them. Draco merely smirked at Hermione and the others.
"So, what's for breakfast?"
Everyone at the Gryffindor table just looked at Hermione and Draco sitting together. Some looked as though Voldemort himself had waltzed into the breakfast hall and made himself at home. Others were slightly opened mouthed, like a fish on a hook. Others looked completely livid.
Hermione greeted the Slytherin warmly and passed the eggs. He was playing it cool, and if she wanted to play off the double life they had started, she needed to be just as cool.
"We'll be meeting in the room of requirement later." She told him quietly. "Don't worry about going to class, I've been told that we're to have private lessons with Professor Rain."
Draco smirked. "I knew being a good boy had to come with some perks."
"We're still doing work." Hermione replied coolly.
"Yes, but this is interesting stuff worthy of my talents," Draco shot back. "Not turning teacups into rats."
Hermione didn't want to admit it, but she had to agree. Whatever the professors had in store for them had to be much more interesting than anything the rest of their year was learning.
An hour later Jessica, Jared, Hermione, Draco, Harry and Ron all were gathered around Professor Rain in the room of requirement.
"Just because you no longer are required to attend classes, does not mean you no longer have a workload laid out for you." Professor Rain started. "You are all very painfully aware that dark times are in front of us, maybe worse than before. The good thing this time around, however, is that we are better prepared, and we have those among us who can work both sides. Harry, Ron, Draco and Hermione will be concentrating for the next few weeks on defense and offense spells. Jessica and Jared will be putting full effort into healing spells. All of you will also need to work on closing your mind, I assume you're familiar with this for of magic Harry?"
Harry nodded and Rain continued.
"Jess and Jared, the two of you will be training with Professor Snape and Madam Pomfrey, working both with healing potions and incantations respectfully. You will be meeting them in the hospital wing of the castle. I trust you remember where that is?"
Jessica and Jared nodded.
"Alright," Rain continued. "You are to go meet with them now. As always, be cautious in the school. Remember what I've taught you."
After Jared and Jessica made their exit, Rain turned to the remaining four. "As I've said, we're going to be concentrating on defense and offense spells. You may be a bit weary of the things you're about to learn, but I do insist that you put your full effort into each and every one of them. Now is not the time for petrifying spells anymore. The people you are facing will surly not be using them on you, and unfortunately now is not the time for mercy."
Professor Rain let his words hang in the air, and then continued. "Today we will be working on tier three curses, can anyone tell me what they are?"
Hermione of course jumped at the opportunity to answer. "It's the step right before you get to the unforgettable curses." She said. "They are curses such as pain, where you can draw blood by waving your wand, or ones that invade your mind, alter their sense of reality. There are tons of curses that we're not supposed to be aware of, but they exist. Most will give you a couple years in Azkaban, but not as awful as the unforgivable."
"Correct." Rain said, "Today we're going to learn the cutting curse. It was formulated in the Middle Ages when sword fighting was popular among muggles. There are different techniques that can be used with this curse. As Hermione said, the curse depends on how you use your wand, and much like the unforgivable curses, it depends on how much emotion you have behind it. It does sound terrible, but you truly have to have the drive to hurt your opponent. You can slash, stab, do just about anything you want within your emotional limits."
For the next two hours the four students practiced the spells on random robed targets that Rain conjured up. To no one's surprise, Draco excelled on the slashing curse. He was able to even cut a few of the figures in two, much to the awe of the other three. Hermione and Ron, on the other hand, were only able to produce minor scrapes, the emotional power behind the attacks were lacking. Harry was able to produce severe-looking cuts, as well as deep gouges in the robes. It was as though the spell directly reflected the emotional state behind the caster.
"I think we've had enough for today." Rain said as the robes disappeared into clouds of smoke. "We will continue tomorrow, and start touching base on protection shields."
The group disbanded, and Harry and Ron went to meet with Jessica and Jared. Hermione and Draco made their way outside, attempting to get some air.
"You were amazing, Draco." Hermione said with a smile. "You look like you've had practice."
"Are you surprised?" Draco asked. It was a rhetorical question however, and they both knew the answer. "My father practically wrote the book on violent curses."
"I'm sorry," Hermione said. "I didn't mean it the way it came out. Your father may be a jerk, but you definitely have the talent and skill that reflects your family name. After all this is over we're not going to forget it. Your father may have soiled your family name, but you're going to make the name Malfoy something to be proud of."
Draco, for the first time in a long time, smiled at Hermione. "You have no idea how much that means to me." He said.
"I don't know about you sometimes." Hermione admitted. "Lord, you scared the shit out of me earlier this year. You weren't Malfoy anymore, you were this creature that seemed bent on my destruction, simply because I existed. You really were scary. What changed?"
Draco was silent for a long time, he looked out to the grounds and got a faraway look in his eyes. Hermione was almost about to change the subject when he finally replied, "I don't know." He stopped, then continued, "I think it's when my mother died. She gave me something, something I've been meaning to show you for a long time now. I realized that she was always so much kinder than my father, quiet, rather stuck up, but kind deep down. She never yelled or hit me, or cursed me. She was always nursing whatever sort of bruise I had, whether it was my body, my ego, or my mind. She loved me. It just took her dying for me to really realize that."
Hermione felt like crying. She could never imagined growing up in a world feeling like no one loved her. Even though she knew that the people she grew up with were not her blood parents, she also realized her parents cared for her enough to hide her from those who would do her harm.
"I don't want you to think I've had a full change of heart." Draco said, almost as an afterthought. "To be honest, I still agree with some things my father says. I do think muggles are below us, but I don't want them killed. I do think that you need to do what you have to do to get what you want in life. You don't get anywhere by being a doormat, but you also end up going nowhere fast when you do something that lands you in Azkaban. I suppose right now I'm looking for that middle point. I'm not going to go proclaim muggle rights, and I think our worlds should remain separate at all costs, but killing them would just be a wasted effort. There are too many."
Hermione gave him a half-smile. She appreciated his honesty, if anything. "What was it you wanted to show me?" She asked.
Draco stopped for a moment. He was still unsure if he was willing to share this piece of his mother with her…just yet. "When the time is right," he said, "I'll show you, I'm just not ready right now."
Hermione was slightly disappointed, and her curiosity was getting the best of her, but she remained quiet about the subject and changed the subject. "When will we be expected back at Malfoy Manor?" She asked.
Draco thought for a few minutes. "It would probably be best if we could get an update from Snape. I'd like to know what we're walking into before we go back. I would imagine they are probably expecting us by next week. We really need to keep up appearances and show up every once in awhile, to let Voldemort think he's giving us orders. We're also going to need to talk to Dumbledore, to see what needs to be found out, and what sort of information we can pass along to keep Voldemort from thinking we are anything but loyal to him now."
"You seem to have already put thought into this." Hermione observed.
"When you've spent your whole life living with my father, you learn to stay a couple steps ahead of him." Draco replied.
The two of them found themselves doing laps around the quiddich pitch. They took turns talking about their past. How they grew up, what it was like to grow up in the magical versus the non-magical world, where they saw the world in ten years…it was all very new and different for them, to be conversing like old friends. Before they knew it, it was mid day, and lunch would be served soon.
"Wow, where did the time go?" Hermione asked after glancing at her watch.
Draco was looking at her. "It flew," he said. "I didn't even realize…" He suddenly could not take his eyes off of her, and even stranger, he didn't want to.
Hermione caught his stare and looked at her feet. "Well. I guess we should go grab some lunch, we've been out here long enough."
"Wait," Draco said, and lightly touched her arm. "There's something…" he stopped, and felt himself being drawn towards her, towards her warm body, her lips, he could almost feel her breathe start to quicken…
Hermione's eyes widened when she realized what was going on, and caught her breath. "Oh Draco, I'm so sorry…" She then turned and dashed back to the castle, leaving Draco alone in the midday sun.
WOW! So, I was checking my email the other day, and realized I'm STILL getting people asking me to update, so I did. A lot has changed; I can't believe I started this in '03. I was a high school sophomore and probably around 17. I'm a junior in college now, and 21. I'm thinking I can finish this, but to be honest I have no idea where I was going with this story 4-5 years ago. Maybe, if anything, my writing has improved. I still don't use a beta, I apologize for that, and I'm just too lazy, ha. In any case, I have a nice desk job now which enables me to stare at a computer screen for 8 hours a day, so maybe, just maybe, I can get this sucker finished.
Until next time,
Ariel )
