On the fifth day of Destiny 2,

My true love gave to me;

Five, war chickens!

"Alright!" Cayde smacked the pointer on the surface of the chalkboard. "Here's the low-down; we've got twenty-four hours until we all die. BUT, there's no guarantee of that if you all do EXACTLY as I say."

He whirled, and pointed with the pointer. "YOU, will infiltrate and execute a shadow operation against enemy command. Whatever you do, whoever else falls, do not let Ghaul out of your sight; you hear me ranger!?"

"And you three will be with me. Our goal... is to pull a Tevis Larsen #12, like the summer of '89. Dark time, dark times." he paced back and forth, hands behind his back. "I expect each of you to be at your sharpest. I won't lie... Billy Joe, you might not make it out alive. We'll be sure to honor your sacrifice for the greater good of all."

"And then we had you, my greatest pride." he crouched down, meeting his student in the eyes. "I'm count on you most of all. You're our moral support, you're our fire. I know you won't let us down... Captain Mcnuggets."

The bird looked at him blankly, and then simply strut forwards several steps before picking at the Hunter's half-eaten sandwich. It stopped after several tries, and the Exo chuckled, reaching out to stroke the chicken's neck.

"Yeah, I thought you'd agree; pumpernickel just don't taste right." carefully, slowly, he slid his other hand under the knighted Mcnuggets, and lifted him up. The other Guardians just didn't get it; you didn't have to be fast to catch a chicken; you just had to be slow, let them come to you, and let them give you permission. If the bird didn't want to be handled, boy, they would let you know.

"Just what are you doing with those poor animals?" He looked up at Hawthorne, leaning against the entrance to the barn.

"Poor animals?" he huffed. He waved one hand to indicate the other four chickens. 'Billy Joe' was quite literally pecking at a rock(hence Cyade's doubt he would survive the coming battles). "These are war chickens."

"War chickens?" she raised one eyebrow incredulously. "Capes, you've got a screw loose in that head of yours."

"'Capes'? You sure your not the one with a screw loose, with that nickname?" he teased.

"I'm not the one with a bucket for a head." she shot back. The Exo rolled his eyes.

"The race card is unladylike." he drawled in good humor. "Devrim would be so disappointed."

"Har har." she said. "You met that Asher guy yet? He's like a mad squirrel on caffeine."

"I remember him from the Tower; he's one of those people you can only handle in small doses." Cayde nodded, rubbing his fingers through the feathers on Mcnuggets' neck.

"What is it with you and the birds, anyway?" she changed the subject. "They run from most Guardians, but it's like you've got some magic touch or something. Even Louis likes you... and he usually doesn't like anyone but me."

"I'm a Hunter. We're good with animals." He shrugged.

"I don't see any other Hunters sleeping in a chicken coop."

"Maybe chickens are my favorite animal."

"Bullhockey."

"I'm not using any hocus-pocus space magic on them, if that's what you're worried about."

"... I still think you're crazy, Cayde."

"Good to hear; I have a reputation to uphold, don't I?"


I... sorta maybe ship Cayde and Hawthorne. Just a little.