Dean had called her name as he caught Manda on an angle around the waist with one arm. He felt the heat radiating from her as he held on to her, and knew that what had happened earlier was happening again. Something was wrong with her, but he had no idea what it could be.
"What the hell is going on with her?" Chuch inquired. She'd seen her friend going down out of the corner of her eye, and then how quickly Dean had grabbed her.
"She gets a little weak in the knees around me," Dean quipped sarcastically. He shifted Manda a little to be able to pick her up, and then bent to get her legs.
Sam watched his brother lift Manda without hesitation, and then how he held her protectively close against him. "Something's wrong with her, Dean."
"I know that, Sam," he grunted out. Then Dean sighed as he looked around for somewhere to put her down. There was no where but the ground or one of their cars, so he decided on her car since it was closer than his. "Come on, get up and quit playing the damsel card with me, Manda." His voice was hard, but held a trace of softness in it as he looked down at her.
Chuch and Sam traded looks of wondered and started to follow.
Dean sat back on the hood of her car, loosened the hold he had on her to lean her back a bit, and then tightened it again to keep her there across him. Then he took his arm out from under her knees, and started tapping her face and calling her name in an attempt to wake her up.
Sam could see the protector coming out in his brother, and just how much he cared for the female hunter in his arms then.
A soft groan came out of her, but Manda didn't come to yet.
"Chuch, go get her some water," Dean ordered harshly. Manda was still so warm, and a little cold water couldn't hurt. Then he went back to tapping her face. "That's it, Manda… get your stubborn ass back here."
Sam's look for Chuch was apologetic since his brother had basically snapped his order at her.
Chuch shrugged it off since she knew what Dean could be like at times, and that right now he was worried about her friend. Then she hurried towards the bar.
He can't save you either. The whisper spoke again, and then its menacing laughter roared in Manda's head as her eyes shot open. The dark feeling in her was stronger now than it had been any other time.
"Welcome back, Chambers." Dean greeted her with a weak smile when she came to. Then he saw the terror in her eyes, and felt her go completely stiff. "What's wrong?"
"She might need a minute to become alert." Sam could see the fear on her as he stood there watching. Then he saw Dean pull her up a bit and a little closer to him at the same time.
The laughter disappeared from her head, and while it disturbed Manda, it was the last whisper that repeated in her head as she looked up at Dean that bugged her more. She wanted to just fling herself around him, but couldn't bring herself to actually do it. "I… I…" she started, and then lost the words. Then she tried pulling away from him and only managed to get her butt off his legs and onto the hood before he gripped her tighter.
"Don't try it." Dean's voice was firm, and his expression was serious as he looked at her. Then he flashed his brother the 'give us a minute' look. "Sammy, go get a couple of drinks in, we'll be in soon."
"Sure," Sam headed back towards the bar. He knew Dean would calm her down first before getting her to talk about what had happened just now.
Chuch was coming out of the doors as Sam was nearing the doors. She knew what it meant without him having to say anything, so she headed back inside the bar with him.
"Okay, it's just you and me now. What's going on?" Dean asked her.
Manda just looked at him and wasn't sure where to start. She knew she had to tell him about the voice she'd heard twice now, and what it probably meant. She turned her head and pressed her forehead against his shoulder.
"Hey… you're all right." Dean wrapped his other arm over her then to make sure she felt safe there with him. "But you've got to tell me what's going on, Manda. Did the same thing happen again?"
"I… I was here," she said quietly. She turned her head again and just leaned against him. "The clerk in the hotel remembered me and gave me the same room I was in a few days ago."
"You should have said something, we can question him," he said. As much as he wanted to get angry with her right now, she'd pull away even more than she already had if he did.
"I don't even need to go in this bar to know I was here. I saw a flash of myself walking in before I passed out… the murder… I know I did it even if I can't remember it." Her voice got distant and hollow.
Dean sighed. He'd been thinking this might happen before they got here. "What else?"
Manda closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "Let go of me first."
"Agree not to run and I will," he replied. He really didn't want to let go of her, but if it kept her talking then he'd do it.
"Deal." It would be easier this way for her. She knew he'd get pissed off when she told him the rest.
Dean let go of her completely and watched as she moved to hang her legs over the front of the car and slid over more to leave some space between them. He wondered what she had to say, and why she chose distance again instead of staying close to him.
She felt dizzy as she sat up straight, and then the pain in her head kicked in. Manda took the keys out of her jacket pocket and handed them to him. "There's a bottle of whiskey with the med stuff in the trunk… get it please."
He looked at her oddly thinking she really didn't need any alcohol right now. "Okay… but maybe you should wait until you're in the bar."
"Just get it, Dean." She sighed, unzipped her jacket and then took in a few more deep breaths of the cool night air as she tried to work up the nerve to talk, and to clear her head.
Dean hopped off the hood and headed for the trunk. He found the whiskey quickly, and opened the partially full bottle as he walked back to her. He pocketed her keys as he stopped right in front of her, and held out the bottle.
Manda took it and downed a long sip. She went to offer it to him, but then put it back to her lips for an even longer sip this time.
"Go easy there," Dean said as he reached for the bottle. When she gave it to him, he put the cap back on it and then placed it further back on the hood. "How about you start telling me whatever it is you've been holding back now."
She absently grabbed at the chain around her neck, holding on to what she had put there instead of the symbol now. It would still keep her safe, but it offered her more strength, and was a reminder she needed with her. "I think I'm beyond screwed, Dean."
"Why?" He looked at her and waited for an explanation.
"It's… it's not done with me." Manda's tone was calm but detached. "I've heard the bastard in my head twice now. Both times before I passed out and when I got back up now, I heard this voice say something to me." She kept her head tilted down because she couldn't bear to look at him.
He stared at her, and was a little pissed with her for not mentioning it before. "What did it say?" Dean's tone was stern as he demanded to know.
"There was whispering that I couldn't make before, but then at the cemetery… it said my parents couldn't save me this time," her voice broke and she paused. "It welcomed me back here before I fainted… and then when I came to… it said… it said you couldn't save me either." Manda knew he was pissed, she could sense it from him without looking at him.
"Son of a bitch," Dean growled out harshly, and then turned around briefly. He was quiet as the anger towards this demon rose in him. It had to be messing with her still somehow, and he didn't know how it was managing to do that without possessing her still, unless it near here. His eyes scanned around then to look around, but also because he didn't want to turn around just yet. He was angry with Manda too, but he didn't want to fight with her, and knew that's what would happen if he started in on her now. He took a deep breath, and tried to push his anger at her aside.
"Is that it?" he asked seriously as he turned back around to face her.
"Yeah," she got quiet again.
Dean lifted her head up to look at him. He needed to see she wasn't lying now, that she'd finally told him everything. "You're sure?"
Manda knew he thought she was holding something back still, but she wasn't. "I think it's linked to me somehow, but I don't know exactly why or how. And because of what it said, I'm starting to think it's the same demon I met years ago." She just looked at him, her eyes wide with fright.
"You should have told me this earlier." He stared at her, and could see all the fear in her then. As much as she tried to hide it, she couldn't, and her toughness was cracking before him. And now Dean just wanted to find the damn thing and kill it for what it had done, what it was still doing to her. If it thought he couldn't save her, it had another thing coming, because that's exactly what he intended to do now as he looked at her sitting there like this.
"I wasn't sure what I was hearing… there's crazy and weird for us, and then there's just plain crazy, Dean. I had to make sure it was what it was before I said anything," Manda admitted faintly.
Dean moved his hand up to the side of her face and rubbed her cheek with his thumb. "What the hell have you gotten yourself into, Chambers?" His eyes searched hers as he wondered just how she had ended up in this mess, and if he had played some part it in somehow.
Manda shrugged. She wasn't sure, but she had an idea and if it was that, she feared what would happen soon enough. "Trouble like always. And history, I think… and if that's the case, then you need to go before it catches up with me again."
"No," he said defiantly. If she thought he was going to leave her here to deal with this alone, she was mistaken, because there was no way Dean was going anywhere until this was over and she was in the clear from whatever was happening.
"I won't lose more people this way, Dean… I can't do it. I'll die before I let it happen again." Manda spoke rapidly as she felt the panic setting in at the thought of the price she might have to pay again.
Dean could see her starting to break, so he put both hands on her shoulders. "It's not going to come to that. I'm not letting it come to that."
"Don't you get it? I'm here… here in this goddamn town where all this shit happened years ago… where I came completely prepared to die." Her voice was louder, but breaking. "You need to go. Just turn around, get Sam and Chuch too, and just leave me here to get it right this time." She knocked his hands off her then, and slid off the hood. "I don't need you, Dean," she yelled as she pushed him. "Just go."
He knew she was trying to send him away by attempting to hurt him, she'd done it before. "Stop it, Manda, just stop." Dean's voice was serious and loud as he tried to get through to her. He stepped closer to her again since she'd managed to push him back a step or two.
"Go… just go. Forget about me for good, and get the hell out of here and away from me." She started smacking her fists against his chest when he was in front of her and tried to push him back again.
Dean took a few of her hits since he knew she needed to get them out. Then he grabbed her by the wrists and pulled her against him. "You know I can't do that, Manda."
And then Manda finally lost it. Everything finally piled up just right and hit her like a ton of bricks. The tears started to fall then and she leaned into him. "I'm so tired of this life," she mumbled through her tears. "I'm sick of it, and everything it costs."
Dean let go of her wrists and wrapped her in his arms tightly. As much as he wasn't used to this kind of thing, he'd been waiting for her to break down completely, so he just let her cry there against him. Her sobbing wasn't hysterical, but almost silent, like it was something to hide. "I know… believe me, I know." His tone was gentle as he related to how tired he was of it himself.
She slipped her arms around him. If anyone understood how tired she was of hunting and all the crap that came with it, it would be Dean. He'd been through too much, more than she had, and yet here he was being strong and dealing with her. She looked up at him through her tearful eyes. "I'm sorry," she managed to get out without choking on the words. "Sorry for just how much you understand that."
He didn't believe that even in her moment of weakness, Manda was apologizing to him for things that weren't her fault, and something they had in common. It was the hunter life that had introduced them to each other, but it was also the same one that would keep them from being together, and he knew it just as much as she did. "Don't be… it's just something else we get about each other." Dean put his hands on her face, and kissed her forehead.
She nodded, and made herself stop crying then. "Sorry for losing it, and for being such a girl on you again."
"I won't hold it against you, you're not Sam," he chuckled. Then he let his hands fall from her face.
Manda sniffled with a small laugh. "Thanks." Then she let go of Dean and wiped under her eyes with the sleeves of her jacket.
He watched her, and then noticed something that bothered him. The symbol was gone from around her neck and replaced with a set of rings. "Where's the symbol that should be hanging from that chain?"
"It's covered, Dean, but go ahead and take a closer look at the rings to make sure," she said. Manda knew he'd want to check it himself to make sure she actually was still safe.
Dean lifted the chain up from her chest. He barely made out the tiny engravings that covered both sides of each ring as he looked at them. "Were they your parents'?"
"Their wedding rings…. dad made me promise to keep them in case I… in case there was anyone one day." Manda had no idea why she was telling him about the promise she'd been forced into, but she just let it out. She had never found anyone who needed the larger one, and while she cared for Dean, a part of her knew this thing between them would never last for very long anyway.
He was silent for a minute. He knew those rings would only ever end up where they were now as he let the chain fall back against her chest. Manda didn't do relationships, and this thing she had with him was as close as it got for her. If Dean was honest about it, this was as close as it got for him too. "Keep them on okay?"
She nodded at him and then took a step back. "Guess we should head inside, so I can fill them in on the rest."
Dean could see she was willing to talk now, but he wondered just how much she'd let them help her with this. "None of us are going to let you do this alone, so if you're doing shutting us out…"
"I am," Manda cut him off quietly. Then she turned around and grabbed the whiskey off the car. "Hey… you still have my keys." She spun back around and looked at him.
He chuckled. "Uh huh, and you're not getting them back tonight."
"Then go put this back where it came from." Manda held out the bottle.
Dean laughed as he took it from her before walking to the back of the car. "Chuch can drive your car back to the hotel. You're riding with me when we're done here." He just wanted to keep an eye on her, and have her close to him just in case something else happened to her again.
"Okay." She followed him quietly to the trunk since there was something she needed in there.
He was sticking the bottle back where he had found it when he noticed her beside him then. "Done fighting me tonight?" Dean asked, a bit surprised. She hadn't even tried to argue about not being allowed to drive her own car back.
Manda reached in, pulled out a messenger style bag and swung it over her shoulder. "Yeah." She was done fighting him tonight. She'd tried to make him leave, and he had stayed and put up with her crap. And now Manda was almost ready to be done with fighting how she really felt about him because of that too.
"Good… got everything you need, weapons included?" Dean asked her, and waited to close the trunk.
"I'm sure you felt a few things on me, and if none of that covers it, there's whatever you have on you," she answered. "I know you've got my back if anything goes down."
"True." He had felt a few things on her when he picked her up, and she was right, if she didn't have what was needed, he probably did. He would always have her back when he was with her too, and he was glad she trusted that. He closed the trunk then.
Manda turned, looked at him and put her hand on his arm. "Stay with me when we get back to the hotel?"
Dean turned to look at her and smirked. She was reaching out, and she wanted him with her again. "Did you really think sticking me with Sam tonight was going to work in the end? You know you can't get rid of me that easily, Manda."
Her laugh was warm as she reached up and let her fingertips brush his cheek. "What am I going to do with you, Winchester?" she asked as she gazed in his eyes.
He raised a brow at her. "I can think of a few things," he teased and told the truth. He needed to shift the mood to something lighter for just a while with her.
"I'm sure you can... and maybe I'll let you show me a few of them before dawn." Manda raised her brow back at him, and gave into the opening he'd given for a lighter atmosphere between them.
Dean grinned at the words, and at how she had matched him without hesitating. "Challenging me, Chambers? Because you know I'll hold you to it."
She laughed as she turned around and walked back to the side mirror to look at her face. "Great, I've got the just-cried-out-my-eyes look," she muttered as she leaned down and looked in the mirror.
He checked her out as he came up behind her. "It doesn't matter," he mumbled.
"Quit checking out my ass, Dean," Manda chuckled, and then stood up straight and turned around to find him a few steps behind her.
Dean's smirk was sheepish at how she'd busted him. "Ready to go inside?"
"Are you walking in with me or before or after?" She looked at him not sure of how he wanted to play this if they still wanted to find out some answers.
"With you." He knew he'd see a few sets of eyes in there wander over Manda, and he would rather have them know she was with him.
"Okay, if that's how you want to play it." She smirked as she turned around and started walking to the door.
"It is," Dean chuckled, and caught up to her in a step. "So, what's in the bag?"
"Something that will tell me if I'm dealing with the same thing or not," Manda paused. "It's everything I was too young or stupid to know or pay attention to years ago, and what I never went through after my parents died… everything they had on that demon."
Their hands hit as they both reached for the door at the same time, and then they looked at each other.
"It's going to be a long night isn't it?" Dean sort of groaned.
"Depends on how fast you can read or just hand it over to Sam or Chuch to let them do it." She smirked at him, and dropped her hand.
"I like the way you think," he said as he opened the door and they walked in.
Neither of them saw the man with the evil grin and black eyes walk out from the shadows around the bar once they had walked in, or how he slipped away into the night laughing.
This is where it went in my head... and hopefully it worked out fine. Hopefully once again I haven't butchered Dean with the softness I have given him when it comes to Manda.
If you've been waiting - sorry! Hope you enjoyed it!
Thanks for reading, or checking it out. If you wish to comment, go ahead, it's appreciated and welcomed :)
