He is angry.
Angry at Sam for having a knack for getting into trouble. Angry at Sam for making Ed doubt her loyalty. Angry at Ed for making him follow Sam as if she isn't worth their trust. Angry at Sam for making him doubt because deep down, Danny knows her, he knows that at the end of the day, Sam's loyalty lies with her. Utterly and solely. But still he refuses to believe that she would ever do anything to hurt them, to hurt him.
Still, he's angry at her. Because she drives him crazy with her stupidities and her nonchalance about everything that could get her killed.
Yet, he wanted to go with her, because he promised, promised her that he wouldn't let anything happen to her. And something might happen if he isn't there, because it's Sam. Something always happens. She smiles, bats her eyelashes and trouble ensues. But Ed said no. He said that he would handle it, that he didn't need him and Danny, angry but obedient, stepped back. He glared at Sam, at her challenging face so that she could see how mad he was at her. He was worried but mostly, strongly, he was furious and the last thing he told her was "Don't be stupid" when all he wanted to say was "Don't die out there".
Then he left to get back a stupid horse when it was Sam who needed him. Now the horse is where it's supposed to be and Danny still hasn't heard from Ed. He sighs, and checks his phone again.
Mike looks at him. "I'm sure she's fine."
Silence.
"Ed would have called if she wasn't, Danny," Mike adds.
Danny nods because he knows Ed would have called if something went wrong, but still, the bad feeling in the pit of his stomach remains.
"Where is she?"
Ed thinks Danny looks half-stupid, half-unprofessional, with his hair all over the place, dirt on his pants and shirt and out of breath as if he ran his way up here. He keeps the thought to himself though.
"How's the horse?" he asks instead.
Danny's entire body tenses, Ed can see it, yet he chooses to ignore him. This is his office, and he doesn't appreciate when people barge into it like they own the place.
"Ed..."
"How is the horse?" he repeats.
Danny waits, counts to three, then says. "Horse's fine. Back to his owner. I did what you asked."
"Good. Now, sit down."
"I'm fine standing."
"Sit down."
Ed keeps glaring at him and Danny eventually yields. He has the feeling Ed wouldn't say anything to him if he didn't have his ass on the chair.
"Sam is fine," Ed tells him because that's what Danny needs to hear to stop being so tense and worried and bratty.
"Really?"
"Really," Ed confirms.
Danny lets out the breath that was crushing his lungs, the pit in this stomach is no longer tight, and his heart feels lighter. Sam is fine.
"What happened there?" Danny asks.
Ed leans back in his chair, crosses his arms and tells him everything. "…Nothing Sam couldn't handle. She's a tough girl. She can be stupid sometimes, stubborn on her good days, but today, today she was very brave," Ed isn't really smiling, but he isn't really not smiling, he doesn't smile so often, but Danny can see the genuineness of his words. "I couldn't have been prouder."
That makes Danny smile a little.
"You told her that, right?" Danny asks, because he can picture Sam, he can see her, running a hand in her hair, being overwhelmed, being happy that Ed, of all the people, would be proud of her. "You told her you were proud of her?"
"I did."
"Good. 'Cause she thinks you don't like her, not like she's ever told me that, but well, I know her so yeah, that must have mean a lot to her."
"You're all my kids," Ed says as if it explains everything, and it does in a way because Danny nods. They're all his kids, but Sam, she's special, she's different. Mostly, she's difficult, acts tough, pretends not to care but one gentle word, one warm caress, and she would break like the little girl she kept safe and guarded inside her. She's the kind of kid that needs the most of love. Ed may not trust her entirely, he doesn't trust anyone completely, but he sincerely likes her.
"Why didn't you want me there? I could have helped," Danny says, his voice even. Yet, his tone sounds reproachful.
Ed isn't phased or surprised. He expected them from Danny, the reproach, the anger, he expected all of it. He knows Danny as if he made him himself.
"You would have got her hurt or worse, you would have got her killed," Ed says, looking at him dead in the eyes, daring him to interrupt or to contract him. "When it's about Mary, you're not objective, which is not great. I've told you before. But when it's about her, about Sam, Danny, you don't think straight, you don't think at all to be honest. Your common sense flies out of the widow and your emotions are all over the place when it comes to Sam," he pauses, and when he sees Danny's face, when he sees him look away, he knows he stroke a nerve. He knows he's right and Danny does too. "We both know you would have tried to play the hero, endangered the mission and Sam in the process. I did what I thought was best for her."
Danny turns back to Ed and there's a flash of anger in his eyes. He doesn't like what Ed is implying, as if he would deliberately put Sam in danger. "She could have died though. Even under your watch."
Ed smirks. Danny has some guts.
"But she didn't. I got her out on time. She's fine," Ed repeats.
Danny stares hard at him. "I would have never forgiven you if something had happened to her."
"I know. That's the reason why I didn't let anything happened to her."
He knocks, once, twice and when she doesn't answer the door, he invites himself in. The door is closed, but he can see there's light in the bathroom.
When she walks out, feet wet and wrapped in her towel, she finds Danny sat on her bed, the bed they used to share. The sheets don't smell like him anymore.
If she's surprised to see him, she doesn't show it.
"Hey."
"Hey yourself," She feels like she should get dressed. He's looking at her so intensely that she feels naked and flustered. But she doesn't move. "What are you doing here?"
"I wanted to check up on you. To make sure you were okay."
She allows herself to smile. His concern is appreciated. "I am."
"Ed told me what happened there. How brave you were," he continues. "He's very proud... So am I."
"Thanks," she says and she means it. Then she tilts her head, glares at him. "You had me followed."
Danny remembers the look on her face when he told her. He had hurt her feelings. Again. He is getting good at this, as good as her. "I was just following orders. Nothing personal."
She doesn't look mad, or disappointed, or tense. Her face seems simply resigned. "Did you think I was..."
"No. I didn't."
His response is quick and not really convincing but she believes him all the same. She likes to think he really didn't think she would ever try to harm the Montecito and the people working there in any way. It's nice to have someone on her side for once. It doesn't happen often. She never lets it happen.
"Okay," she says and drops the topic.
It's awkward. He hasn't been in her room since they broke up, and now he's looking at her like before, like nothing happened. He smiles at her, gently, softly, then pats the bed, waits for her to move. And Sam obliges, because it's him, and sits next to him. They're not touching but the familiarity engulfs her nonetheless.
He feels warm. Like being home after a long, and harsh winter.
"You could have died today," he's stating the obvious but it feels nice having the words out. It's nice that she didn't die.
Sam has her hands on her lap and Danny notices she doesn't have her nails perfectly done, as if she had bitten them too much, too hard. He wonders if she was scared there. He is certain she would lie if he asked her.
"I know. I didn't though. Just like you asked. 'Don't die out there',"He looks at her like she's crazy because he never actually said those words and she rolls her eyes at him. "You said it with your eyes. Your angry eyes," she proceeds. "You were angry and all you said to me was 'Don't be stupid' which I am never," she said with a frown, "but I know you enough to decipher your coded messages. So no dying today like you asked. I'm fine, McCoy."
Out of habit, his fingers come up to caress the skin of her face and brush the crease off the forehead. "Promise?"
"Sure thing. Not the first time I see people get shot and die."
She realizes that was the wrong thing to say when he sighs, his fingers leaving her face. "Sam..."
"Sorry. Bad joke. But I'm fine. Don't worry about me," she tries to smile but it looks too fake even for her. She's tired. She's seen enough dead people for a lifetime or two.
"I always worry about you."
"Then don't. I'm okay."
She gets up to move away from him but he grabs her arm and forces her to turn around. Now she's right in front him, looking down at him, her mouth half open, her eyes big and bright. She's missed him. She sees him every day, yet, he's not really her Danny when he's working. He's not really her Danny anymore.
"You shouldn't be here, McCoy."
"I shouldn't," he confirms with a smile. "You're married."
"Yeah. But I don't really care."
That makes him laugh. "I've noticed, Marquez."
It's her turn to smile triumphantly, brilliantly, as if she's won. "Danny?"
"Hm?"
"Do you miss me? Us? I miss us."
They say that people who love each other, they end up thinking about each other at the same time, that their thoughts meet, and intertwine, and blend together. Often Danny wonders if Sam ever thinks of him because he thinks about her quite often.
So he nods as an answer to her question, his hands grab at her hips, bringing her closer. "All the damn time."
So she leans down, her hair tingling his cheeks, and kisses him like never before.
xxx
Europe is great, and fun, and hot but internet sucks and it makes me want to cry.
But I miss home a little, a lot, like Danny misses Sam.
